Remarkably, it turns out the 'Chupsack is all that it appears but no more. I'm as surprised as you are, because I was totally expecting someone to leap out of it and shake this story out of it's fetch-quest rut Ah well. She decants some 'Chup into the palm of her hand, dipping a nugget in deep and savoring the sweet, sweet 'chup on the spicy nugget crumb. "mmmmmm that's good chup!" she confirms.
TBK's impassioned defence seems to move her (or she's still in the throes of Chupstacy), she seems ready to accept that he might be a Mason, but balks when he starts insisting the Burt is a mason of good standing. Everyone knows the only thing in the quarry he'd give a good hammering to is sitting in the boss lady's chair. "Wait, if your arms and legs are in the quarry, who's arms and legs are these?" - She slaps the Knight's arm with her chup-stained palm.
All carnivores in the team must roll a Wisdom save vs DC 10 to avoid being overcome with the urge to take a bite out of that delicious be-saused arm. 1HP damage per bite!
"I'm afraid I must ask you to leave while I discuss the particulars of this trip with Leonard and Ca- Guys! Where are you going?"
The pair of masons, who were taking this opportunity to leave the meeting, freeze on the stairs.
"I - uh - We feel like we've served our purpose. We're gonna go back to work, see if there's any creepy stone-faced pervs around, and ask if maybe they want to go on this treasure hunt, it's not our thing"
"Yeah, I'm not treasure hunt material. I'm gonna go home to my wife and kids"
"You have a wife?"
"Lenny, you were best man at my wedding!"
"Is *that* why you were all dressed up!"
They exit, stage ... uh... down? Alys grabs a handful of nuggets from the buffet and then climbs back up on Krauss. (Alyss is on Krauss. Alyss on Krauss. Do you see how much effort I'm going to for you guys? ...I give up...). "Ok, I guess we're done. You guys can have the room, and the left over nuggets if you like. I suppose I'm not going to need this map to Tricklerock Cave after all - I'll just leave it on this table beside the Halfling-sized bottle of ketchup. Masons, OUT!" - Krauss stomps down the stairs.
As soon as she leaves, the bottle starts to shake again and compress on it's own before a *surprise* halfling pops out, opens it's mouth and more ketchup falls out. Or at least you assumed it was ketchup until you saw the missing tongue and now are no longer sure what was coming out of the mouth. Said halfling goes to walk out the now empty room and looks around seeing the room was not as empty as he thought and runs behind the bottle. You both hear in your mind "You didn't see anything...… honest"
Also, the treasure map is now gone and a small red handprint is left on the table
OMG! Swiftg....uhhh...I mean, some random halfling looks to be joining our quest! And apparently can't talk! Which is the best kind of woman, I don't really know about halflings myself. And yes, I did notice the Alyss on Kraus thing, I was waiting for the perfect moment to make my own joke about it and it was RUINED. I'm probably not bitter about it though. I digress. Halfling! We need that map! We've gotten very strong DM hints that it is probably our next quest, along with something about a plague for a 7 year old.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
You hear the voice in your head again. "Why yes that was a SWIFT entry if I say so myself. I mean... There is no halfling hiding here and even if there was I think you would find they are most certainly not a woman. Also, this map which I most definately did not steal is not as useful. I didn't think through my theft and may or may not have smudged ketchup on it."
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Burt, by the way, chose to fail his wisdom save and takes a large bite out of Hammy's arm. Look, I'm not drunk anymore, I know what I saw. And 'chup besmirched map reading is one of my specialties. So don't you worry about that, half-lady-ling. And speaking of you being a lady... Burt aims one of his famous winks her way, attempting to wink his way through the hiding spot.
Wink check: 21
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
Given the halfling has no defined gender on their sheet I'll let them decide if they need to roll a save, or if they don't want to be saved for that matter. Feel free to take your squelching to pm. But bear in mind that chupskins aren't 100% effective, even if you're both male.
Burt eyes the bottle for a moment, then decides against. Bad memories from that time of the month.Anyways...we're trying to move a little more efficiently through the module, here. Bring that map, and lets go get some treasure! And the plague! And possibly solve a crime or two!
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
Surprise comes over the face of sir Igknightus Most Darkus as he exclaims, "Er... Ouch!" He glances at his arm, over at the previously occupied chuppage, down at the dwarf (physically you people, we're all equal here some are just lower to the ground is all, geesh), and then back to his arm and finally over to Burt. "Hey, uh... Not sure but I feel the old bones rolling there proves you to be mostly wise, at least more that 10 wise. Maybe let's not eat the arms just yet?" And then he adds as he looks over at the new member, "Yeah... he's a little of kilter sometimes, you may want to watch your appendages. So uhhh, let's see that map tinny there. "
Pfft...Petro is literally the greatest character I've ever made. With the exception of this one. And probably most others. He's definitely the best bard I've made that's level 4 and is in the Karamore campaign. Again, I digress. He studies the ridiculously detailed map he was just given, trying to figure out the best route to the treasure. Well guys, it looks like if we travel to the middle of the ketchup stain and go south, we should find it.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
"It certainly looks bloody" (once again in your heads the halfling has no tongue and so I will stop saying in your heads. It is always in your heads. In fact this whole game is in your headsso the voice is in your heads in your heads) the halfling eldritch licks the ketchup off the map and heads to progress plot, jumping on stumpy for a ride even though he has no way of knowing stumpy is involved in the campaign
Stumpy looks at his new passenger, forlorn. He says nothing but one look into those deep, mournful eyes is enough to tell you that it is quite late at night and he doesn't fancy venturing out into the wilds till morning.
Damn....shorty started getting all existential in that post. Feel free to stay up 'chuppin it, smalls, but we done kilt some snoutlaws and need some rest. Like, 8 hours worth, roughly.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
From downstairs they hear an accented voice declare "come, mein chums - wir shudden to guest hovel returnen! Ze von up ze street frum der fancy Inn mit de exschplodink kitchen!"
As residents of the town, Burt and Iradon would surmise they're talking about Mother Yalantha's run down slum-hostel around the corner, the cheap alternative to the Swinging Sword. As an outsider, TBK would merely know it was top quality exposition. Of course you could just find a tarp and use Greg as a crossbeam for a jerry-rigged tent?
Burt nods emphatically behind Hamton.
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
Remarkably, it turns out the 'Chupsack is all that it appears but no more. I'm as surprised as you are, because I was totally expecting someone to leap out of it and shake this story out of it's fetch-quest rut Ah well. She decants some 'Chup into the palm of her hand, dipping a nugget in deep and savoring the sweet, sweet 'chup on the spicy nugget crumb. "mmmmmm that's good chup!" she confirms.
TBK's impassioned defence seems to move her (or she's still in the throes of Chupstacy), she seems ready to accept that he might be a Mason, but balks when he starts insisting the Burt is a mason of good standing. Everyone knows the only thing in the quarry he'd give a good hammering to is sitting in the boss lady's chair. "Wait, if your arms and legs are in the quarry, who's arms and legs are these?" - She slaps the Knight's arm with her chup-stained palm.
All carnivores in the team must roll a Wisdom save vs DC 10 to avoid being overcome with the urge to take a bite out of that delicious be-saused arm. 1HP damage per bite!
"I'm afraid I must ask you to leave while I discuss the particulars of this trip with Leonard and Ca- Guys! Where are you going?"
The pair of masons, who were taking this opportunity to leave the meeting, freeze on the stairs.
"I - uh - We feel like we've served our purpose. We're gonna go back to work, see if there's any creepy stone-faced pervs around, and ask if maybe they want to go on this treasure hunt, it's not our thing"
"Yeah, I'm not treasure hunt material. I'm gonna go home to my wife and kids"
"You have a wife?"
"Lenny, you were best man at my wedding!"
"Is *that* why you were all dressed up!"
They exit, stage ... uh... down? Alys grabs a handful of nuggets from the buffet and then climbs back up on Krauss. (Alyss is on Krauss. Alyss on Krauss. Do you see how much effort I'm going to for you guys? ...I give up...). "Ok, I guess we're done. You guys can have the room, and the left over nuggets if you like. I suppose I'm not going to need this map to Tricklerock Cave after all - I'll just leave it on this table beside the Halfling-sized bottle of ketchup. Masons, OUT!" - Krauss stomps down the stairs.
Strix, Shifter Shadow Monk in Lost Mines of Phandelver ¦ Sihegiall Human Soulknife Rogue in In Search of Molly McGuffin
As soon as she leaves, the bottle starts to shake again and compress on it's own before a *surprise* halfling pops out, opens it's mouth and more ketchup falls out. Or at least you assumed it was ketchup until you saw the missing tongue and now are no longer sure what was coming out of the mouth. Said halfling goes to walk out the now empty room and looks around seeing the room was not as empty as he thought and runs behind the bottle. You both hear in your mind "You didn't see anything...… honest"
Also, the treasure map is now gone and a small red handprint is left on the table
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
OMG! Swiftg....uhhh...I mean, some random halfling looks to be joining our quest! And apparently can't talk! Which is the best kind of woman, I don't really know about halflings myself. And yes, I did notice the Alyss on Kraus thing, I was waiting for the perfect moment to make my own joke about it and it was RUINED. I'm probably not bitter about it though. I digress. Halfling! We need that map! We've gotten very strong DM hints that it is probably our next quest, along with something about a plague for a 7 year old.
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
You hear the voice in your head again. "Why yes that was a SWIFT entry if I say so myself. I mean... There is no halfling hiding here and even if there was I think you would find they are most certainly not a woman. Also, this map which I most definately did not steal is not as useful. I didn't think through my theft and may or may not have smudged ketchup on it."
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
Burt, by the way, chose to fail his wisdom save and takes a large bite out of Hammy's arm. Look, I'm not drunk anymore, I know what I saw. And 'chup besmirched map reading is one of my specialties. So don't you worry about that, half-lady-ling. And speaking of you being a lady... Burt aims one of his famous winks her way, attempting to wink his way through the hiding spot.
Wink check: 21
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
Given the halfling has no defined gender on their sheet I'll let them decide if they need to roll a save, or if they don't want to be saved for that matter. Feel free to take your squelching to pm. But bear in mind that chupskins aren't 100% effective, even if you're both male.
Strix, Shifter Shadow Monk in Lost Mines of Phandelver ¦ Sihegiall Human Soulknife Rogue in In Search of Molly McGuffin
Look again... And I thought the picture was good enough for gender. Wis save, advantage for chup bottle, +5 for not being attracted to males.
27 and the wink really turns on the bottle. Just not the halfling
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
Burt eyes the bottle for a moment, then decides against. Bad memories from that time of the month. Anyways...we're trying to move a little more efficiently through the module, here. Bring that map, and lets go get some treasure! And the plague! And possibly solve a crime or two!
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
The halfling magically appears behind you. (11 - definately not a stealth roll to move around while you are looking at the bottle) "Here is the map"
To TBK (telepathy, so Burt can't hear however much he tries)
Jeez what is wrong with him?
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
Burt reads the spoiler: Pfft. Better psychiatrists than you have asked that question. Burt attempts to decipher the map.
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
The halfling (whose name I need to remember but it came from the random name generator) once again talks ONLY TO TBK
That means no reading Burt. If you read this then Petro loses all his charm... Because he is dead
Okay Petro is getting all the attacks for the rest of the campaign targeted on him.
Nothing is actually said though
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
Surprise comes over the face of sir Igknightus Most Darkus as he exclaims, "Er... Ouch!" He glances at his arm, over at the previously occupied chuppage, down at the dwarf (physically you people, we're all equal here some are just lower to the ground is all, geesh), and then back to his arm and finally over to Burt. "Hey, uh... Not sure but I feel the old bones rolling there proves you to be mostly wise, at least more that 10 wise. Maybe let's not eat the arms just yet?" And then he adds as he looks over at the new member, "Yeah... he's a little of kilter sometimes, you may want to watch your appendages. So uhhh, let's see that map tinny there. "
Though not currently a member, seeking admission to the really long and important signature club. Please consider this as a current CV.
Other personalities... Burgee , The Colorless Knight, Fiorello, RW Goodbarrel, Dred, Evrik - Out of the Abyss & Dungeon of the Mad Mage
Site Rules & Guidelines || Tooltips || Homebrew FAQ || Snippet Codes || Syllvva's Guides
Strix, Shifter Shadow Monk in Lost Mines of Phandelver ¦ Sihegiall Human Soulknife Rogue in In Search of Molly McGuffin
Pfft...Petro is literally the greatest character I've ever made. With the exception of this one. And probably most others. He's definitely the best bard I've made that's level 4 and is in the Karamore campaign. Again, I digress. He studies the ridiculously detailed map he was just given, trying to figure out the best route to the treasure. Well guys, it looks like if we travel to the middle of the ketchup stain and go south, we should find it.
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
"It certainly looks bloody" (once again in your heads the halfling has no tongue and so I will stop saying in your heads. It is always in your heads. In fact this whole game is in your headsso the voice is in your heads in your heads) the halfling eldritch licks the ketchup off the map and heads to progress plot, jumping on stumpy for a ride even though he has no way of knowing stumpy is involved in the campaign
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
Stumpy looks at his new passenger, forlorn. He says nothing but one look into those deep, mournful eyes is enough to tell you that it is quite late at night and he doesn't fancy venturing out into the wilds till morning.
Strix, Shifter Shadow Monk in Lost Mines of Phandelver ¦ Sihegiall Human Soulknife Rogue in In Search of Molly McGuffin
But... But... I'm not tired. And no one needs a long rest. Iradon (finally looked at his name) presses the skip night button
After joining more my signature got out of hand so I am now a proud member of the extended signature club!! :)
Damn....shorty started getting all existential in that post. Feel free to stay up 'chuppin it, smalls, but we done kilt some snoutlaws and need some rest. Like, 8 hours worth, roughly.
Back and ready to DM and chew bubblegum. And I'm alllll outta bubblegum.
From downstairs they hear an accented voice declare "come, mein chums - wir shudden to guest hovel returnen! Ze von up ze street frum der fancy Inn mit de exschplodink kitchen!"
As residents of the town, Burt and Iradon would surmise they're talking about Mother Yalantha's run down slum-hostel around the corner, the cheap alternative to the Swinging Sword. As an outsider, TBK would merely know it was top quality exposition. Of course you could just find a tarp and use Greg as a crossbeam for a jerry-rigged tent?
Strix, Shifter Shadow Monk in Lost Mines of Phandelver ¦ Sihegiall Human Soulknife Rogue in In Search of Molly McGuffin