So, from my understanding of what you've shared, you have one player who's making every effort to make the game fun and two players who are making every effort to ruin the first player's fun. You need to talk to these two dudes away from the table and make it clear that their behavior at the table is unacceptable.
Males characters do not approve being tiefling whilst all around us are demons and so on, thats why they reject her and if something happens badly (which make the story really interesting and funny) they blame her or ignore hers quite interesting ideas what to do. Then there is one or more "cuz u r woman" even if the tiefling is male..
This right here? This is BS. Your most creative and dedicated player is being harassed at the table because she's a woman. No more excuses from them, or from you. It needs to stop if you want to preserve your game. If they can't stop, boot them and find new players.
Anyways, the girl is doing the best job at roleplaying and creates fun stuff in the game. After last session she felt really badly (she had nice idea in game and rolled a 1, happened to hurt other characters and get arrested and in the got bullied because of it) and is thinking about changing character a bit, being more silent maybe just to appease others. But I really dont that the-only-fun and impactful character to destroyed itself.
This is just sad. Your most creative player thinks it's on her to be quiet at the table so she can appease these two jerks? You need to give her some support here. Let her know you appreciate the creativity and enthusiasm she's brought to your game. A bad roll can happen to anyone at any time. The other players bullying her for it should be out of bounds at your table, and you shouldn't be afraid to say so when they pull that $#!+.
In summary, stop making excuses for these guys. Boot them from the game if they can't change their ways. You are in danger of losing your best player because you can't step up and curate a space that's fun for all your players.
Don't work on the problem when the game is running. Do it before you start, even better a few days before.
Your female players needs some emotional support. Tell her she does well and her actions and role play make the game fun for you as a DM. Encourage her not to give up and show up the next meeting.
Tell the guys they need to change the ways they are treating the female player at the table. Period. No wiggle room to argue. If they can't treat her with respect, they are out of your game. If they have not turned their back on you and the game night, tell them that how the female player is playing the game as you intended it to be (role play, creative ideas, initiative to progress the story) and you want them to try to play along that way. Because you want to include them and their interests, you tell them to include some of their input into the next session (so they do not get all negatives here and they have a chance to show their good will - and a chance to get rewarded for that). I am sure, your female player can adapt to a new story line, before you cater to hers again .
If everything fails, Boot the guys and play with the female player. I have done a lot of 1 player, 1 DM game sessions the past few years and they have been a lot of fun.
I will say that this is a game and supposed to be fun. If at any point during the session fun is not being achieved, then maybe it's time for a break. Everyone takes a step back to chill and remember to just have fun.
Now if some think that ruining anothers fun is fun for them, there are therapists for that.
Think perhaps your lady player might have two or three of her friends who might like to be introduced to TTRPG? I bet that group would be a lot of fun for which to DM.
Sometimes it just doesn't work. I honestly don't know that I would even give one more chance. Tell them why they are gone and then let them be gone. Totally on board. UNACCEPTABLE.
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Thank you. ChrisW
Ones are righteous. And one day, we just might believe it.
I agree with all statements and sentiment expressed above by the various posters.
I do believe most have overlooked a small, yet pretty important facet of the story:
I cant think of any ways to change their attitude quickly, its kind of grown into the bones thing however idiotic is that and I cant afford to lose players because they are everything I have.
You will lose her if the situation isn't resolved. Nobody wants to devote hours of their time for a poor, hurtful experience. As 'chriswalrath' mentioned, replacing the boys and expanding the group with those of her invitation may steer your party in a better direction. If left without any option - I would work with her individually. Have conversation about the state of the party and the way she is treated. Discuss potential options with her, as she is the one being abused on a routine basis. Perhaps knowing that you're also observing this and the confirmation that these guys are out of line will help her feel more at ease. Aid this further by crafting the story RP to empower her, maybe to the point where she gets to decide their fate.
I don't want to start a full rant, but find a way to make it enjoyable for her, or she'll likely bail on the group. Best course of action would be to stifle the inappropriate remarks, of course.
So, from my understanding of what you've shared, you have one player who's making every effort to make the game fun and two players who are making every effort to ruin the first player's fun. You need to talk to these two dudes away from the table and make it clear that their behavior at the table is unacceptable.
This right here? This is BS. Your most creative and dedicated player is being harassed at the table because she's a woman. No more excuses from them, or from you. It needs to stop if you want to preserve your game. If they can't stop, boot them and find new players.
This is just sad. Your most creative player thinks it's on her to be quiet at the table so she can appease these two jerks? You need to give her some support here. Let her know you appreciate the creativity and enthusiasm she's brought to your game. A bad roll can happen to anyone at any time. The other players bullying her for it should be out of bounds at your table, and you shouldn't be afraid to say so when they pull that $#!+.
In summary, stop making excuses for these guys. Boot them from the game if they can't change their ways. You are in danger of losing your best player because you can't step up and curate a space that's fun for all your players.
I'm 100% on board with Jolly here.
I will only add that playing with 1 player can be super fun. I've been doing it for nearly a year now, and it's pretty great.
"Quality over Quantity", as they say. :)
Don't work on the problem when the game is running. Do it before you start, even better a few days before.
Your female players needs some emotional support. Tell her she does well and her actions and role play make the game fun for you as a DM. Encourage her not to give up and show up the next meeting.
Tell the guys they need to change the ways they are treating the female player at the table. Period. No wiggle room to argue. If they can't treat her with respect, they are out of your game.
If they have not turned their back on you and the game night, tell them that how the female player is playing the game as you intended it to be (role play, creative ideas, initiative to progress the story) and you want them to try to play along that way. Because you want to include them and their interests, you tell them to include some of their input into the next session (so they do not get all negatives here and they have a chance to show their good will - and a chance to get rewarded for that). I am sure, your female player can adapt to a new story line, before you cater to hers again .
If everything fails, Boot the guys and play with the female player. I have done a lot of 1 player, 1 DM game sessions the past few years and they have been a lot of fun.
I agree with the other guys.
I will say that this is a game and supposed to be fun. If at any point during the session fun is not being achieved, then maybe it's time for a break. Everyone takes a step back to chill and remember to just have fun.
Now if some think that ruining anothers fun is fun for them, there are therapists for that.
There are no male or female players at my table, only players who contribute (or at least try to) to the fun, and those who do not.
Beyond that, any advice worth giving has already been given.
Philosopher. DM. Chronic Pain Adventurer.
Think perhaps your lady player might have two or three of her friends who might like to be introduced to TTRPG? I bet that group would be a lot of fun for which to DM.
Sometimes it just doesn't work. I honestly don't know that I would even give one more chance. Tell them why they are gone and then let them be gone. Totally on board. UNACCEPTABLE.
Thank you.
ChrisW
Ones are righteous. And one day, we just might believe it.
I agree with all statements and sentiment expressed above by the various posters.
I do believe most have overlooked a small, yet pretty important facet of the story:
You will lose her if the situation isn't resolved. Nobody wants to devote hours of their time for a poor, hurtful experience. As 'chriswalrath' mentioned, replacing the boys and expanding the group with those of her invitation may steer your party in a better direction. If left without any option - I would work with her individually. Have conversation about the state of the party and the way she is treated. Discuss potential options with her, as she is the one being abused on a routine basis. Perhaps knowing that you're also observing this and the confirmation that these guys are out of line will help her feel more at ease. Aid this further by crafting the story RP to empower her, maybe to the point where she gets to decide their fate.
I don't want to start a full rant, but find a way to make it enjoyable for her, or she'll likely bail on the group. Best course of action would be to stifle the inappropriate remarks, of course.
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