Hello! This is my first time homebrewing on D&D Beyond, and I'd love some feedback on this new spell. I think it's kinda silly that necromancers' whole schtick is "animating the dead to do their bidding," but they don't get to do this until level five. I like the image of a novice necromancer trying their best to animate a skeleton, but their control is tenuous and the spell doesn't always work.
I just copied the Animate Dead spell and made adjustments so that the spell is appropriate as a level 1 spell. I also limited it to the Necromancy sub-class, which they would get immediately upon choosing this school at level 2. In my opinion, the necromancy sub-class is a bit weaker than comparable wizard sub-classes (Divination and Evocation, for instance). This is a buff.
Some changes I made from the original Animate Dead spell:
Only for necromancer wizards, automatically attained at level two.
Duration is concentration for an hour, instead of no concentration for 24 hours.
Casting time is 1 action instead of 1 minute.
No way to extend control of animated creatures.
If you lose concentration, the creatures turn on you, rather than simply ignoring your commands.
To end concentration, you need to spend an action.
If a creature take damage, there's a 5% chance it turns on you.
There's no good way to create a "horde" of skeletons or zombies with this spell, since there's no way to re-assert control over creatures. The spell can be upcast, to control one additional skeleton / zombie per level above 1st. Once the necromancer learns Animate Dead, they'll probably stop using this spell. The only advantage that Unstable Animate Dead has is that the casting time is 1 action instead of 1 minute. I'm picturing an expert necromancer who is short on time, and needs to cut corners to create some zombies for a quick getaway.
Is this balanced for a 1st level spell? If it's overpowered, I'd rather lower the power than make it a second level spell, since the whole point of this is to get our babby necromancers a skeleton pal as soon as possible.
Do not publish your work before you get the feedback, instead, copy and past it in the forum thread asking for feedback. Doing things this way avoids excessive enumeration on the published homebrew, and it will also be easier for you to modify it according to the feedback. As published content is well... published, it is public, and it is generally best practice to try and publish finished products.
Now for feedback on the actual spell, I love the idea of uncontrollable creation turning against you if you dare to lose concentration even for a split second, but the few existing spells with similar mechanic are higher level, and this in my opinion, cause a single zombie or skeleton ain't a big enough threat for this spell to be a problem.
Let's take an example, this is a 2nd level spell, so a group of 4 lvl 3 adventurers, including a wizard with this spell. They fight rebel soldier, 4 or 5 of them. In this example, a single additional zombie against the party won't really change the balance, and this despite the action economy. But the zombie when under the wizard control, follows its order, and can be used to better control the terrain, to force enemy movement, etc... Basically, this monster is more dangerous as a tool to control the battlefield than as an actual opponent, at least in my opinion.
So I'm not sure this spell is balanced, nor how to improve it, my only suggestion would be to adapt the concept to a much stronger spell, with monsters that could actually be a threat to the party.
Just like Elek said, don't publish until your done and agree with with comments. Now I do think a way that this can be fixed, is if the spell functioned closer to danse macabre then animate dead.
Let's take an example, this is a 2nd level spell, so a group of 4 lvl 3 adventurers, including a wizard with this spell. They fight rebel soldier, 4 or 5 of them. In this example, a single additional zombie against the party won't really change the balance, and this despite the action economy. But the zombie when under the wizard control, follows its order, and can be used to better control the terrain, to force enemy movement, etc... Basically, this monster is more dangerous as a tool to control the battlefield than as an actual opponent, at least in my opinion.
If I understand this correctly, you're saying that skeleton is way more useful to the party when under the control of the wizard, and merely a nuisance if it turns against them. In other words, too powerful for a 1st level spell as written. Fair enough. Another adjustment I considered is forcing the wizard to use their action (not their bonus action) to issue commands. This would prevent the wizard from casting most other spells while controlling the undead, limiting the action economy benefit.
Now I do think a way that this can be fixed, is if the spell functioned closer to danse macabre then animate dead.
Oh, this is great! I hadn't looked at danse macabre, but yeah, that's very similar to what I'm going with here. I'll consider adapting this spell to my needs.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
To post a comment, please login or register a new account.
Hello! This is my first time homebrewing on D&D Beyond, and I'd love some feedback on this new spell. I think it's kinda silly that necromancers' whole schtick is "animating the dead to do their bidding," but they don't get to do this until level five. I like the image of a novice necromancer trying their best to animate a skeleton, but their control is tenuous and the spell doesn't always work.
I just copied the Animate Dead spell and made adjustments so that the spell is appropriate as a level 1 spell. I also limited it to the Necromancy sub-class, which they would get immediately upon choosing this school at level 2. In my opinion, the necromancy sub-class is a bit weaker than comparable wizard sub-classes (Divination and Evocation, for instance). This is a buff.
Here's the homebrew spell: https://www.dndbeyond.com/spells/965918-unstable-animate-dead
Some changes I made from the original Animate Dead spell:
There's no good way to create a "horde" of skeletons or zombies with this spell, since there's no way to re-assert control over creatures. The spell can be upcast, to control one additional skeleton / zombie per level above 1st. Once the necromancer learns Animate Dead, they'll probably stop using this spell. The only advantage that Unstable Animate Dead has is that the casting time is 1 action instead of 1 minute. I'm picturing an expert necromancer who is short on time, and needs to cut corners to create some zombies for a quick getaway.
Is this balanced for a 1st level spell? If it's overpowered, I'd rather lower the power than make it a second level spell, since the whole point of this is to get our babby necromancers a skeleton pal as soon as possible.
First and foremost, general advice:
Do not publish your work before you get the feedback, instead, copy and past it in the forum thread asking for feedback. Doing things this way avoids excessive enumeration on the published homebrew, and it will also be easier for you to modify it according to the feedback. As published content is well... published, it is public, and it is generally best practice to try and publish finished products.
Now for feedback on the actual spell, I love the idea of uncontrollable creation turning against you if you dare to lose concentration even for a split second, but the few existing spells with similar mechanic are higher level, and this in my opinion, cause a single zombie or skeleton ain't a big enough threat for this spell to be a problem.
Let's take an example, this is a 2nd level spell, so a group of 4 lvl 3 adventurers, including a wizard with this spell. They fight rebel soldier, 4 or 5 of them. In this example, a single additional zombie against the party won't really change the balance, and this despite the action economy. But the zombie when under the wizard control, follows its order, and can be used to better control the terrain, to force enemy movement, etc...
Basically, this monster is more dangerous as a tool to control the battlefield than as an actual opponent, at least in my opinion.
So I'm not sure this spell is balanced, nor how to improve it, my only suggestion would be to adapt the concept to a much stronger spell, with monsters that could actually be a threat to the party.
Feel free to check out my hombrew: Magic Items, Spells, Monsters, Species, Feats, Subclassses, and Backgrounds. More detail in my Homebrew Compendium.
If you have any comments, suggestions, or ways to improve my homebrew, tell me, I'm always looking to improve!
Map commission Here.
Just like Elek said, don't publish until your done and agree with with comments. Now I do think a way that this can be fixed, is if the spell functioned closer to danse macabre then animate dead.
My Homebrew | Background | Feats | Magic Items | Races | Spells | Subclass | Homebrewery
To see my more recent homebrew creations, please check out my content on Hombrewery.
Thanks for pointing that out! I was unaware of this norm, but it makes a lot of sense and I'll bear it in mind moving forward.
If I understand this correctly, you're saying that skeleton is way more useful to the party when under the control of the wizard, and merely a nuisance if it turns against them. In other words, too powerful for a 1st level spell as written. Fair enough. Another adjustment I considered is forcing the wizard to use their action (not their bonus action) to issue commands. This would prevent the wizard from casting most other spells while controlling the undead, limiting the action economy benefit.
Oh, this is great! I hadn't looked at danse macabre, but yeah, that's very similar to what I'm going with here. I'll consider adapting this spell to my needs.