Hello, I (DM) have what i believe is a problem player on my hands. and i was hoping to beseech the great council for advice. 

to lay it out plainly, this player has been spoken to, multiple times about their behavior at the table, and no real progress has been made, so i am considering asking this person to leave the table, but i want to be certain it is not my own perceived slights leading me to this conclusion, or if, this person is indeed a problem player. 

Here is a breakdown of the issues

-disruptive (by this i dont mean their character is disruptive, i mean, they bring up topics that arent relevant to the game, randomly leave the game with no warning, argues arbitrary things like pronunciation of fictional things, prices, ETC, interrupts the game)

-is only concerned about their character story, has outright stated they do not care about the main story, and has to be corrected on information by both myself and the other players on the rare occasion this person does participate, they rarely pay attention, unless it is something they directly benefit from

-never roleplays, even when prompted by other players or myself (the DM)

- is passive aggressive and pushy about game time, levelling up, whether or not the session should be cancelled based on real world issues (for example, and the main thing im referencing here, i had a severe allergic reaction, and had to see my doctor on one of the days we were supposed to have a session, and when i notified the players the session was cancelled, the problem player repeatedly insisted that i was fine and that i should run the game, state that I shouldn't cancel on such short notice (I cancelled about 9 hours before the session started).  

-makes remarks and comments that are arbitrary to the game, and (at least how I perceive it) only serve to upset people. 

-consistently makes comments about things that could be done better, but never directly addresses his concerns about the game (for example, i have made the choice as the DM to not include all the names of locations on a world map, only revealing them to the players when they either learn about, or visit that location, this particular choice has been a point of contention, and i cannot think of a single session where this was not mentioned by the problem player Sidenote, the other players are fine with this method) 

It has reached a point now where i feel uneasy in the pit of my stomach, and the game is no longer fun for me, but I feel an obligation to the other players, i understand this is only 1 point of view, and i might have some biases when referring to this person, but i have tried my best to play out the information in an unbiased manner so, AITA or is this a problem player in your eyes, and if so, does this kind of behavior warrant being asked to leave the game?

Thank you, i suppose i am too close to the situation to see it from a less adversarial standpoint, thank you for your input, and wise words, it is appreciated. 

I'll be blunt, as you've noted, we're not going to pretend able to judge. We haven't seen what's happening, the tones, we don't even know you. Every single point that you've said, I could see being a reaction to and exaggeration of fairly normal behaviours where you're being oversensitive. For example, you say he doesn't roleplay - it could just be that he's very self conscious about it. Perhaps he felt annoyed the short notice and maybe you didn't tell him why - it can get very annoying when people cancel short notice, and if it's frequent, if can feel very much like excuses. I could go on.

None of that is to say you're wrong or a jerk or anything. I promise you I'm not trying to say that you are the one who is in the wrong. Just...that we literally can't say. We don't know what's going on. It sounds bad, but that doesn't mean a lot.

What I can glean is that he seems upset and unhappy. He seems like something is bothering him. Perhaps what's best is to take him aside, mention that something seems to be bothering him. If he doesn't open up, mention that his behaviour is upsetting you, and ask if you've done anything to offend him. Just try to resolve any problems. If it is not resolvable, then regardless of who is in the right or wrong, the relationship isn't working and it's probably for the best that it ends.

You make some fair points, I will definitely try talking to him again, and, while arbitrary, we have only had 4 cancelled sessions, only 1 of them resulting from my cancellation. thank you for your time and advice.

You say he has been spoken to multiple times about his behavior and it has not changed. As others have said we are in no position to  determine where he is in the wrong but I think it is clear that he doesn't like the way you run the game and you don't like the way he plays it. I would just take him aside and say that even after speaking ot him multiple times it is clear that he wants different things from the game than you and that the best solution is that he finds a table that is more compatable with what he wants.

Whether you or the player is right or wrong is almost irrelevant. It seems like you do not have fun when you play with this person. That’s really all it takes. You don’t owe them a D&D game. If playing with them makes you (not to mention the rest of the group) miserable, cut them loose. You are not doing anyone any favors by keeping them around.

Just say your Playstyles seem incompatible, and wish them well.

Quote from Xalthu >>

Whether you or the player is right or wrong is almost irrelevant. It seems like you do not have fun when you play with this person. That’s really all it takes. You don’t owe them a D&D game. If playing with them makes you (not to mention the rest of the group) miserable, cut them loose.

This, with the caveat that it's not necessarily up to the DM to decide who goes and who stays. It's a group thing. If it's him or you, let the group decide as a whole. Chances are they'll prefer you to stay, but it should be a decision from the group as a whole. Explain you're not only not having fun, but that the way things are going now is actually upsetting to you. Setting the proverbial fuse like that might also serve as a final warning to that player if the rest of the group supports that he either shapes up or ships out.  

As others have said, I would just ask the player to leave. Regardless of whether who is right or wrong, I do not think it makes sense to keep playing with them if it is not enjoyable.