This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
The air got thicker and mustier as you approached the temple doors in pursuit of the foul demon. As the doors open a stench beyond humanoid comprehension assaulted your nostrils. And then you saw it.
Greasy rolls of fat encasing its body in a grotesque armor. And tiny stubby little legs that, surely out of divine punishment, somehow haven't collapsed upon the being's own weight. The frog demon. It smiles in delight as you enter, absent-mindedly sucking down a halfling trapped in its mouth. "I think I'll have you with garlic and rosemary." he remarks. There's a sheen of delight on his face, or perhaps it's sweat from the raging braziers behind him?
But now is not the time to debate lighting. Now is the time to roll initiative.
”It’s kind of you to think of me, but I’ve always believed that I’d go better with a nice coating of cranberry sauce,” Weslocke replies, a smile on her face as she unsheathes it and directs its tip towards the foul thing. “But I’m not going to get eaten today!”
(OOC: Initiative 11 in character sheet)
Ford, on the other hand, stares, head cocked as that of a disoriented dog. “Ros-uh-mary?” he asks, his voice a deep drawl that matches his appearance. “Will you—uh—will you share?” Although he’s wary of the beast, he also looks a little interested, as if the glistening, demonic frog could be a friend.
(OOC: Initiative 12 (he has advantage on initiative), also in game log.)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning. DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask) You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you. Extended sig here, check it out!
[[ I'll be honest, when I first made the statblock I completely forgot about legendary resistances... But considering part of my desire here was to test him this and he is supposed to be able to fight a party, I probably should've done that... Particularly since I started thinking, "Wait, 1 v 4, I need to redesign him..." Plus this would be a rather anticlimatic finish after all the prep and tech issues... So, I'm going to add those legendary resistances and refactor his HP to keep the same CR. So with 1 hold monster you took out ~90hp from him! Won't add legendary actions at the time now though probably will make a later iteration.
So, 1st, you won! 2nd, timey wimey demonic magic stuff excuse. ]]
Jack looks as the Grompster holds out his hand to cast a spell. For a moment he seems to freeze, eyes glazing over, when a vile shroud descends over him and he breaks free. With a laugh he says, "The munchy wants a fight."
Grompster Ford <---------- currently up Weslockes Schlompy Jach Hackett
Party is 65 ft from Jack Hackett. (To help Baalz have a general layout.)
Ford sprints towards the creature, holding his axe high -- it appears that he's experienced a sudden change of temper. "I...AM...NO...MUNCHY!" he shouts bravely -- although he doesn't quite reach the beast in time.
(Action: Dash. Sadly, nothing else. Weslocke's turn'll be later today.)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning. DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask) You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you. Extended sig here, check it out!
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Weslocke, on the other hand, has some tricks up her sleeve. A swirling ball of fire erupts above her palm, its light flickering across the dim stone. "We're having frog legs for dinner tonight!" she shouts, grinning as she releases the fireball towards the demon.
(OOC: 5th-level fireball, DC 17 DEX save, 34 fire damage)
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A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning. DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask) You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you. Extended sig here, check it out!
Shclompy, the heavily armored clown, jumps around on all fours before throwing the spear in his hands, then drawing another and throwing that one too. He moves forward 5ft, but stays close to the squishy casters so they can benefit from his Aura of Protection.
Shclompy, the heavily armored clown, jumps around on all fours before throwing the spear in his hands, then drawing another and throwing that one too. He moves forward 5ft, but stays close to the squishy casters so they can benefit from his Aura of Protection.
Attack: 6 Damage: 9 Attack: 8 Damage: 9
(OOC: I love it, Baalze)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning. DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask) You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you. Extended sig here, check it out!
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Weslocke, on the other hand, has some tricks up her sleeve. A swirling ball of fire erupts above her palm, its light flickering across the dim stone. "We're having frog legs for dinner tonight!" she shouts, grinning as she releases the fireball towards the demon.
(OOC: 5th-level fireball, DC 17 DEX save, 34 fire damage)
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Weslocke, on the other hand, has some tricks up her sleeve. A swirling ball of fire erupts above her palm, its light flickering across the dim stone. "We're having frog legs for dinner tonight!" she shouts, grinning as she releases the fireball towards the demon.
(OOC: 5th-level fireball, DC 17 DEX save, 34 fire damage)
Jack DEX Save: 5
[[ Between cooking and eating dinner and then a church group in the evening, took a little longer between posts than I initially anticipated. ]]
The fireball explodes around Jack, engulfing him in its flames. But at the end he looks at the bard and say, "That tickled."
[[ Fire Resistance, half of 34 is 17 damage taken. ]]
When Schlompny prattles around and throws spears they bounce off the demon's fat rolls. He picks one up and begins using it as a toothpick. As he fidgets with it he remembers Ford by his feet. "Munchy!" he says.
Bite @ Ford Attack: 21 Damage: 16 piercing damage and 23 poison damage.
Also (forgot to include in prior post) On a hit from bite the target is grappled (escape DC 13) and restrained
With Ford grappled in his maw, Jack then looks at the other group of munchies and leaps forward in what, frankly considering his overburdened legs, should be an impossible feat. The ground rumbles beneath his weight as he lands.
Bonus Action: Impossible Leap to go 30ft forward
And then waddles forward another 15ft
He then holds out his hands to call down demonic vengeance upon the casters. Centering his spell on Schlompy he says, in a muffled voice as he keeps hold of Ford, "You have no power here, paladin!"
Flame Strike w/ necrotic instead of radiant @ Grompster, Schlompy, Weslockes 17 necrotic and 11 fire damage DC DEX 18 for half //do remember you are all getting the +5 bonus from Schlompy
@Baalze, Grompster is 15ft from Jack; Schlompy is 10ft from Jack There are also pillars either could reach to get out of sight
Initiative Grompster <---------- currently up Ford (grappled DC 13 and restrained) Weslockes Schlompy Jach Hackett (17 damage, 1 leg res used, 1 5th lv spell slot used)
(OOC: Oof. Wow. Laughed out loud when I saw the damage. Weslocke DEX 17 -- man darn it, so that'll be all the damage :/)
Ford cries out in the giant frog's grip, his fingers slipping on his axe as he valiantly tries to escape. "No munchies!" he cries. "No munchies!" Blood streaks along his side, giving him a ghastly pallor as it begins to drain away. "No! No! No!"
Weslocke sees the frog beginning to tense, running as it leaps, but its muffled spell gets through, even as she throws herself behind a pillar. "Ouch...that thing really packs a punch."
(OOC: Also just realized that Weslocke has 49 HP :0)
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A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning. DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask) You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you. Extended sig here, check it out!
The Grompster frowns deeply, raising a hand as he backs up, moving up to 30ft to any available cover. "Yuz will pawwish... swowly."
DC 17 CON save or Elemental Bane for Fire (I got lucky last time, so I'm hedging my bets)
Schlompy laughs maniacally, bathed in black flame. "UNBOTHERED. IN MY LANE. MOISTURIZED."
(OOC: Wow)
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A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning. DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask) You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you. Extended sig here, check it out!
DC 17 CON save or Elemental Bane for Fire (I got lucky last time, so I'm hedging my bets)
Jack CON Save: 20
I saw a 16 first.
The demon looks perplexed as the spell begins to take hold. "Y'all got any Fireball whiskey?" he asks as the Grompster schleps away.
Initiative Grompster (concentrating on elemental bane Ford (grappled DC 13 and restrained) <---------- currently up Weslockes Schlompy Jach Hackett (17 damage, 1 leg res used, 1 5th lv spell slot used) current effect: elemental bane fire
The air got thicker and mustier as you approached the temple doors in pursuit of the foul demon. As the doors open a stench beyond humanoid comprehension assaulted your nostrils. And then you saw it.
Greasy rolls of fat encasing its body in a grotesque armor. And tiny stubby little legs that, surely out of divine punishment, somehow haven't collapsed upon the being's own weight. The frog demon. It smiles in delight as you enter, absent-mindedly sucking down a halfling trapped in its mouth. "I think I'll have you with garlic and rosemary." he remarks. There's a sheen of delight on his face, or perhaps it's sweat from the raging braziers behind him?
But now is not the time to debate lighting. Now is the time to roll initiative.
Jack Hacket: 5
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
”It’s kind of you to think of me, but I’ve always believed that I’d go better with a nice coating of cranberry sauce,” Weslocke replies, a smile on her face as she unsheathes it and directs its tip towards the foul thing. “But I’m not going to get eaten today!”
(OOC: Initiative 11 in character sheet)
Ford, on the other hand, stares, head cocked as that of a disoriented dog. “Ros-uh-mary?” he asks, his voice a deep drawl that matches his appearance. “Will you—uh—will you share?” Although he’s wary of the beast, he also looks a little interested, as if the glistening, demonic frog could be a friend.
(OOC: Initiative 12 (he has advantage on initiative), also in game log.)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning.
DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew
Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask)
You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you.
Extended sig here, check it out!
*I will say that I can't see images on DDB, so if that's a battlemap I'm effectively blind*
*I'll try to post later today, but I just got up and I just generally feel that tactical decisions aren't going to go very well for me*
*But nonetheless, Initiative*
Grompster: 15
Schlompy: 9
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Is it a DDB general issue or imgur-specific?
Initiative Order
Grompster <---------- currently up
Ford
Weslockes
Schlompy
Jach Hackett
[[ monster at the bottom of initiative, not good for him ]]
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
*Both, actually*
The Grompster holds up a hand. "Schtop it. No munchiis."
Hold Monster. DC 17 WIS save or Paralyzed.
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Jack WIS Save: 11
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
[[
I'll be honest, when I first made the statblock I completely forgot about legendary resistances...
But considering part of my desire here was to test him this and he is supposed to be able to fight a party, I probably should've done that...
Particularly since I started thinking, "Wait, 1 v 4, I need to redesign him..."
Plus this would be a rather anticlimatic finish after all the prep and tech issues...
So, I'm going to add those legendary resistances and refactor his HP to keep the same CR. So with 1 hold monster you took out ~90hp from him!
Won't add legendary actions at the time now though probably will make a later iteration.
So, 1st, you won!
2nd, timey wimey demonic magic stuff excuse.
]]
Jack looks as the Grompster holds out his hand to cast a spell. For a moment he seems to freeze, eyes glazing over, when a vile shroud descends over him and he breaks free. With a laugh he says, "The munchy wants a fight."
Grompster
Ford <---------- currently up
Weslockes
Schlompy
Jach Hackett
Party is 65 ft from Jack Hackett. (To help Baalz have a general layout.)
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
(OOC: Wow. Ford's useless if outside of range.)
Ford sprints towards the creature, holding his axe high -- it appears that he's experienced a sudden change of temper. "I...AM...NO...MUNCHY!" he shouts bravely -- although he doesn't quite reach the beast in time.
(Action: Dash. Sadly, nothing else. Weslocke's turn'll be later today.)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning.
DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew
Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask)
You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you.
Extended sig here, check it out!
Weslocke, on the other hand, has some tricks up her sleeve. A swirling ball of fire erupts above her palm, its light flickering across the dim stone. "We're having frog legs for dinner tonight!" she shouts, grinning as she releases the fireball towards the demon.
(OOC: 5th-level fireball, DC 17 DEX save, 34 fire damage)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning.
DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew
Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask)
You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you.
Extended sig here, check it out!
Shclompy, the heavily armored clown, jumps around on all fours before throwing the spear in his hands, then drawing another and throwing that one too. He moves forward 5ft, but stays close to the squishy casters so they can benefit from his Aura of Protection.
Attack: 6 Damage: 9
Attack: 8 Damage: 9
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
(OOC: I love it, Baalze)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning.
DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew
Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask)
You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you.
Extended sig here, check it out!
Jack DEX Save: 5
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
[[ Between cooking and eating dinner and then a church group in the evening, took a little longer between posts than I initially anticipated. ]]
The fireball explodes around Jack, engulfing him in its flames. But at the end he looks at the bard and say, "That tickled."
[[ Fire Resistance, half of 34 is 17 damage taken. ]]
When Schlompny prattles around and throws spears they bounce off the demon's fat rolls. He picks one up and begins using it as a toothpick. As he fidgets with it he remembers Ford by his feet. "Munchy!" he says.
Bite @ Ford
Attack: 21 Damage: 16 piercing damage and 23 poison damage.
[[ Jack's turn still going ]]
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
Also (forgot to include in prior post)
On a hit from bite the target is grappled (escape DC 13) and restrained
With Ford grappled in his maw, Jack then looks at the other group of munchies and leaps forward in what, frankly considering his overburdened legs, should be an impossible feat. The ground rumbles beneath his weight as he lands.
Bonus Action: Impossible Leap to go 30ft forward
And then waddles forward another 15ft
He then holds out his hands to call down demonic vengeance upon the casters. Centering his spell on Schlompy he says, in a muffled voice as he keeps hold of Ford, "You have no power here, paladin!"
Flame Strike w/ necrotic instead of radiant @ Grompster, Schlompy, Weslockes
17 necrotic and 11 fire damage
DC DEX 18 for half
//do remember you are all getting the +5 bonus from Schlompy
@Baalze, Grompster is 15ft from Jack; Schlompy is 10ft from Jack
There are also pillars either could reach to get out of sight
Initiative
Grompster <---------- currently up
Ford (grappled DC 13 and restrained)
Weslockes
Schlompy
Jach Hackett (17 damage, 1 leg res used, 1 5th lv spell slot used)
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
(OOC: Oof. Wow. Laughed out loud when I saw the damage. Weslocke DEX 17 -- man darn it, so that'll be all the damage :/)
Ford cries out in the giant frog's grip, his fingers slipping on his axe as he valiantly tries to escape. "No munchies!" he cries. "No munchies!" Blood streaks along his side, giving him a ghastly pallor as it begins to drain away. "No! No! No!"
Weslocke sees the frog beginning to tense, running as it leaps, but its muffled spell gets through, even as she throws herself behind a pillar. "Ouch...that thing really packs a punch."
(OOC: Also just realized that Weslocke has 49 HP :0)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning.
DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew
Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask)
You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you.
Extended sig here, check it out!
Saves:
Schlompy: 23
Grompster: 26
The Grompster frowns deeply, raising a hand as he backs up, moving up to 30ft to any available cover. "Yuz will pawwish... swowly."
DC 17 CON save or Elemental Bane for Fire (I got lucky last time, so I'm hedging my bets)
Schlompy laughs maniacally, bathed in black flame. "UNBOTHERED. IN MY LANE. MOISTURIZED."
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
(OOC: Wow)
A professional goofball, writer, and frisbee player. Probably the best thing to happen to you since you woke up this morning.
DM: Liquid Swords - A Historical Wuxia Campaign, In the Depths - A Fantasy Homebrew
Flying Pig Cultist of the Cult of Flying Pigs (don't ask)
You're amazing, don't you know that? All of you.
Extended sig here, check it out!
Jack CON Save: 20
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida
*RISK RISK RISK*
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
I saw a 16 first.
The demon looks perplexed as the spell begins to take hold. "Y'all got any Fireball whiskey?" he asks as the Grompster schleps away.
Initiative
Grompster (concentrating on elemental bane
Ford (grappled DC 13 and restrained) <---------- currently up
Weslockes
Schlompy
Jach Hackett (17 damage, 1 leg res used, 1 5th lv spell slot used) current effect: elemental bane fire
This is a signature. It was a simple signature. But it has been upgraded.
Belolonandalogalo Malololomologalo Tumagalokumagalo, Sunny
Eggo Lass, Bone and Oblivion
Tendilius Mondhaven Paxaramus, Drakkenheim
Silverwood Group 1 | Silverwood Group 2 | Hacking the Hackett
Get rickrolled here. Awesome music here. Track 51, 10/23/25, Viva La Vida