I am curious if others see one of my recently created characters the same way as I do. So based upon the information below, if I came to your table with this character, what kind of character would you expect me to be playing. I have purposefully not included his full character sheet or backstory because I want to see what kind of character others would expect.
So basically, what class would expect this character to be, what race or races. What would you expect his backstory to be like, what events would you expect to have brought him to adventuring at such a relatively young age and any other expectations or inferences that you'd care to make about him.
Name: Cedrik Hornraven
Age: 17
Height: 5 foot 11 inches (180 cm)
Eye colour: Its difficult to tell as sometimes (most of the time) they appear to be brown but at other times, when he is quiet and still - they seem to take on a greenish yellow tint. This instantly vanishes though and goes back to being brown as soon as he notices anyone looking at him.
Body type: Athletic and well proportioned.
Description: When he is not playing the fool and making merry or showing off his athletic prowess, Cedrik likes to find a shady spot where he can loose himself in thought. In these moments, one could be excused for believing that Cedrik was actually some great ethereal being as his long, long hair wafts around him like black smoke, its tendrils curling and moving of their own volition. His cloak — or perhaps that is his hair too — shifting in an unfelt wind as pain and grief silently chase each other across his moonlike face. There is something else too— something that sends icy chills down your spine, something dark and mesmerising that is not entirely human, shifting just beneath the surface as though it were some savage beast searching for a way to break free from the confines of its cage.
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I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
From what you're giving us, my guess would be some sort of half-orc lycanthrope honestly. Maybe a warlock class, or fighter, or sorcerer.
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My mother told me once that the stars were heroes whose days have long since passed. And that they burned for as long as someone remembered them. But when people forgot about them, they burned out. So even after they die, they continue to shine for millions of years until they are forgotten. And it is only when you are forgotten that you truly die.
If this was a cyberpunk world you would totally be correct LOL. Sadly though its a high fantasy D&D world.
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I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
Half-elf of wood elf extraction, any class with a touch of nature magic about it. Perhaps a subtle Genasi, earth, air or fire. Perhaps he's a human who has been touched by otherworldly power - sorcerer, fey pact Warlock, druid.
If you showed up at my table with that character, I'd be expecting you to play some other character.
Any reason why in particular? I am honestly interested in how you would expect him to be like.
I honestly won't take offense or be upset if you tell me the reason you don't like him.
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I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
It isn't the character per se, but you have woven this quasi-supernatural mystique about him that is not really fitting for a beginning level character. Also, he has the slight odor of a Mary Sue character about him and those never turn out well in my experience. Finally, you probably have a long and intricate backstory for this character and, frankly, backstory is the part of the story that wasn't cool enough to be in the game. A character that comes into the game with such a backstory means you are heavily invested in that story and it really leaves no room for character growth and development. So there you go.
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As for me, I choose to believe that an extinct thunder lizard is running a game of Dungeons & Dragons via Twitter!
It isn't the character per se, but you have woven this quasi-supernatural mystique about him that is not really fitting for a beginning level character. Also, he has the slight odor of a Mary Sue character about him and those never turn out well in my experience. Finally, you probably have a long and intricate backstory for this character and, frankly, backstory is the part of the story that wasn't cool enough to be in the game. A character that comes into the game with such a backstory means you are heavily invested in that story and it really leaves no room for character growth and development. So there you go.
I see the points that you are making and they are genuine concerns for both a players character and the wider game.
The way I have created him though, is rather simple and he doesnt have any long or complicated backstory.
Before he was an adventurer he was pretty much just a peasant. Yes, he was born with this supernatural aura about him that does make him appear different but other than his appearance - it really doesn't have any real possitve effect on his stats or anything.
In actuality it gives him a negative in charisma because people tend to be afraid of the way he looks at first and so mostly people don't want to really get to know him much and sort of ignore him in the hopes that he will just go away.
He was born to good parents, although they were peasants, they were good people and they loved their child despite the way he looks but the other people in his village would blame him for everything that went wrong, other kids would bully him (when they were brave) and nobody really made him feel welcome or that he belonged there with them.
That's why he is an adventurer when he is so young. He left home to travel to different places in the hopes of finding other people like him or at least finding out the reason why he is so different. He hasn't been successful in his quest yet, but it remains a his ultimate goal and his travels brought him naturally into the adventuring life.
He's pretty inexperienced (he is only 17 after all). He had been travelling for a year before he meets the party he eventually joins, so he is a Level 1 character - higher level that the level 0 he was as a peasant before he started out but still just really a beginner.
He does wear hide armour and a thick cloak (which sort of merges into his aura but again it's just cosmetic looks) and he actually found it on a dead bandit. He also found an old rapier of pretty average craftsmanship and a dagger and 50 gold pieces (which he has mostly spent over the last few months since he found them).
I am a little confused still about his class. I wanted him to be a bard because he likes performing but with his low charisma I think he would be a pretty unsuccessful one. Though he does have a natural intelligence. I gave him that because I thought I was important for him to be able to research why he looks the way he looks.
So in reality, apart from his supernatural aura, he is nothing complex or world breaking and is pretty much a blank slate as far as adventuring is concerned.
He could join a level 1 party who I would expect to be a bit stand offish at first because of how he looks but over time (a few sessions) would come to realise that under his menacing looking aura, is actually a pretty nice person who is really just happy to have people who aren't ignoring him or shooing him away (childhood experiences)
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
I agree with Auberginian, we'd have to have a session zero on your character before the campaign began. The story you've crafted for this character would have been much better realised over the course of a campaign. Perhaps as a warlock, where your pact slowly transforms your character's physical appearance - but the bond's power is too tempting to resist.
Not wanting to trample on your idea, it's just that unusual or, in this case, 'mystic' appearances for the sake of 'being unique' are a personal pet-peeve of mine - particularly when it causes others to be suspicious, wary, or distant. As a DM, it's frustrating to have to fit an outsider into the world. As a player, you'd get frustrated eventually too when there was no adventuring to be had, as - by your own wish - other players would struggle to engage with you, and NPCs won't give you directions to the goblin cave because, in their eyes, you're a freak.
Any level 1 character idea that results in you getting arrested the moment you walk into a town should probably be reconsidered. But chat to your DM, and see what you can work out. Mainly, I'd ask yourself why you want your character's main defining point to be 'looking different', and how you want that to fit into the wider campaign.
In my experience characters that are presented as mysterious or “chosen” are less fun for the group. The player far too often has a set idea of what the characters is and hope for too much of the spotlight. If the others are fine with it, that can work, but it’s seldom a good option. I would rather stress to try and bring elements to the group that allow that character, and the other ones, to become unique down the road, without a blueprint as to how or why. Both as DM and players, story hooks that can engage many, not just one, are good for the campaign and the whole group.
In your example, I would rather see your character as the undistinguished country bumpkin whose much older brother was weird and then just disappeared. Then it’s a story hook the whole group can engage in (where is the brother, why the funky eyes etc) and all can develop from (finding him and solving the why means you all do special stuff and perhaps you get a wonky appearance as well many levels down the road).
BTW, in my mind 17 is not terribly young for an adventurer. Children were generally working quite hard by age 10 in Ye Olde Times, married and starting their own families long before 17.
Back to your regularly scheduled discussion.
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Perpetually annoyed that Eldritch Knights can't use Eldritch Blast, Eldritch Smite, and Eldritch Sight.
What are the flaws, traits, bonds, and ideals for the character? That would help get a better picture of the character. A lot of assumptions can be made about the backstory, so I’m trying to clarify where your mind is at.
This seems a sketch more of what a Player wants the character to become, or a sketch for a character in a novel, than an actual playable RPG character.
As a DM, I'd look at that whole last paragraph ( in the OP ), and say "Don't tell me, show me. There are no mechanics for making other players think or feel what you're describing. If you can act well enough to convey that to other Players, then more power to you".
I'd allow the mysterious eye color changes - that seems harmless enough - but in Session 0, I'd also want to know what your character's personality is, what his goals are - what does he want to do.
And that's where it seems to fall apart: you don't seem to have an idea of what you want this character to be, as you summarize the character as "So in reality, apart from his supernatural aura, he is nothing complex or world breaking and is pretty much a blank slate as far as adventuring is concerned".
His whole concept appears to be outsider misunderstood teenager who has been touched by something seeks friends to whom he can relate. So far as I can see, there's no reason for this character to be an adventurer. He could accomplish his goal easily enough being a travelling circus performer, or a courier, or an itinerant farm hand moving from county to county with each season. In fact he's more likely to find people like himself in the circus/carnival world.
One of the few restrictions I have at my table is that you need to create a character who a) Is an adventurer, and b) is willing to adventure in a group - as "outsider characters" who can't/won't mesh with the group cause problems with table dynamics, and to be blunt - if I'm in an adventuring group which has to periodically fight for survival, I need to have ( or quickly develop ) trust that my teammates will have my back because they're part of my team.
I don't get the impression that this character concept fulfills either condition.
It's a suitably dramatic flavor text to describe part of a background for a character, and I think someone with suitable acting talents could brings facets of these ideas to an adventuring character - but as it stands I don't think it's a viable full blown character concept, yet.
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I was trying to make a very misunderstood character, you are correct.
People assume he is some kind of monster, or some Fey-like being or some kind of fiend or something else because of the way he looks. The way he looks make people take a back step but if you can get beyond his outward appearance (which most people don't even try to do) you find a young person who is kind and considerate and will always back you up (though hes quite inexperienced) - he will at least try.
Especially if you get close enough to him to call him a friend.
I had toyed with the idea of him first joining the circus but getting asked to leave as nobody was coming - even in the circus, he was just too different. In the end though, I abandoned that idea because I wanted him to still be a teenager when he started to adventure and set off on his quest to find other people like himself or discover why he was born this way
It seems that most people agree though. Either he is not yet a playable character or it wouldn't be possible to play him in his current form.
I am going to go back and take his character sheet - just to remind myself about the the character that I have created so far - and then start to create him from the start again. I still want to have a misunderstood character but maybe that doesn't have to be because of his appearance. I could just make him a standard human character who is loud, likes performing and playing pranks on people, which sometimes get him into trouble and so people think he is a bad apple or something when he is actually a nice person.
Instead of being judged by some mystical aura , he could be judged because of how he acts instead. So instead of people thinking he is a monster or something, people just think that he is childish and silly and always getting into trouble.
Maybe instead of adventuring to find people like himself - he adventures to get rich because in his inexperienced opinion, if he was rich, people would respect him. This could be like a point of growth, where he realises through his interactions with the rest of his party that people don't necessarily just respect you because your rich but because you're honest, hardworking and reliable and generally a good person who doesn't just act out all the time.
That way I could make him a bard like I wanted him to be and play him through the campaign, slowly growing up and eventually realising (by the end of the campaign) that he doesn't actually want to be an adventurer because he likes performing much, much more and that he doesn't just want to be a bard either. So when the campaign ends he he has become much more mature and grown up and having found his purpose in life decides to set out on his own with the new goal of becoming a folk hero. Sharing his joy of living and through his performances, bringing light and hope to all the forgotten people of the world.
This would be a much different character than I had originally wanted to play and I a not even sure if that would be any better than he was before.
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
That way I could make him a bard like I wanted him to be and play him through the campaign, slowly growing up and eventually realising (by the end of the campaign) that he doesn't actually want to be an adventurer because he likes performing much, much more and that he doesn't just want to be a bard either. So when the campaign ends he he has become much more mature and grown up and having found his purpose in life decides to set out on his own with the new goal of becoming a folk hero. Sharing his joy of living and through his performances, bringing light and hope to all the forgotten people of the world.
I'm glad you're revisiting your character - it's well worth taking the time to create a character that you, and everyone else, will really enjoy. You'll be playing as him for a long time, dice-rolls considered!
That said, I still think you're being too detailed. The quote from your post has laid out an entire story for your character before you've even started!
Why not create a canvas with a few strokes, rather than saturated with paint? Choose a few traits, bonds, flaws and a loose objective for your character. E.g:
Traits: I'm notoriously cheeky, always tip-toeing the line between an eye-roll and a slap across the face with my quick-wit and cocksure smile
Flaws: I'm not always great at reading people, and my banter and pranks can get me into trouble
Bonds: I want to shake off the shackles of my peasant upbringing. Soon the world will know my name - and the sound of my lute!
And then see where the campaign takes you! Grow your character organically in response to the world. Play to your character, evolve and learn. Have fun exploring your character - something tragic might happen on the adventure that completely changes your character's outlook on life. He might come into great wealth, or plummet into poverty. The exciting part is not knowing.
Most of the people here are touching on a very important aspect in creating a character, you've painted yourself into a corner. You feel that you've left the door open to all these wonderful opportunities and possibilities, but in the end you've almost tied your, and the DM's, hands based on the key points of your design.
As Chequers put it, you'll have to create the broad strokes of your character, and give some thought into the 5 Ws.
Who is your character? I am the unwanted child of a political power, sent off to a military camp to be trained as a soldier.
What does your character hope to achieve? I want to obtain massive power as a sorcerer and use that power to overthrow the government which imprisoned me. From there I will gather others like me to create a new order.
When? This is up to the DM.
Where does this start? This place is held secret by me, only the DM will know. Where does the adventuring start? In a cemetery outside of Neverwinter.
Why is your character adventuring? I was a prisoner who wanted to over throw the current status quo. In my attempt to escape I accidentally opened a planar portal to the abyss. With the assistance of an Imp, we managed to escape into the prime material.
How do you plan to accomplish your goal? I will seek out wizards and sorcerers, their libraries and hidden tomes, learning all I can about the arcane arts. How do I relate to the world? I am apprehensive and defensive around women, I hide my appearance from everyone, and I disguise myself when I interact with people to hide my identity.
---
In the end I had to explain a few things to my DM about this character, but I left enough open to let the DM play with this however he felt. I got my Imp familiar, the only request I made due to my description, and I played a Drow Sorcerer for many years. The information I gave to create the character left many open things for the story to go where ever it needed, my story didn't assume anything about the world around me, other than being Drow, and it allowed me to interact with a party without causing problems.
That type of approach to your character is probably going to be best, talking with your DM about what you want to have happen with your character, and RPing the quirks about your character will all take care of reaching that final image you have in your head about what your character will become.
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So guys, I have been working at making my character better and more like a playable character than a story character. I have basically, completely redesigned him from the group up. Gone is the dark supernatural aura and the antsy teenage brooding. I also discarded the loner aspect as well and changed his look and feel.
Also, he is now a Bard/Sorcerer multi-class character who draws his power and talents from his Draconic bloodlines.
He is basically an entirely different character than he was before, but he seems to be much more playable now and I am actually excited about finishing his backstory, which is all I have left to do. He is pretty much finished now though and so I thought that I would share him with you https://ddb.ac/characters/4299128/2o5SQv because I am excited to hear what you guys think of him now, compared to the ideas that I had before.
Is he more playable?
Does he look interesting?
Have I improved him, made him worse or not really changed him at all?
Also, anything else you would care to share about his redesign would be greatly appreciated.
Looking forward to reading all your comments and opinions on him now.
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I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
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I am curious if others see one of my recently created characters the same way as I do. So based upon the information below, if I came to your table with this character, what kind of character would you expect me to be playing. I have purposefully not included his full character sheet or backstory because I want to see what kind of character others would expect.
So basically, what class would expect this character to be, what race or races. What would you expect his backstory to be like, what events would you expect to have brought him to adventuring at such a relatively young age and any other expectations or inferences that you'd care to make about him.
Name: Cedrik Hornraven
Age: 17
Height: 5 foot 11 inches (180 cm)
Eye colour: Its difficult to tell as sometimes (most of the time) they appear to be brown but at other times, when he is quiet and still - they seem to take on a greenish yellow tint. This instantly vanishes though and goes back to being brown as soon as he notices anyone looking at him.
Body type: Athletic and well proportioned.
Description: When he is not playing the fool and making merry or showing off his athletic prowess, Cedrik likes to find a shady spot where he can loose himself in thought. In these moments, one could be excused for believing that Cedrik was actually some great ethereal being as his long, long hair wafts around him like black smoke, its tendrils curling and moving of their own volition. His cloak — or perhaps that is his hair too — shifting in an unfelt wind as pain and grief silently chase each other across his moonlike face. There is something else too— something that sends icy chills down your spine, something dark and mesmerising that is not entirely human, shifting just beneath the surface as though it were some savage beast searching for a way to break free from the confines of its cage.
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
From what you're giving us, my guess would be some sort of half-orc lycanthrope honestly. Maybe a warlock class, or fighter, or sorcerer.
Finnish Death Metal fan
If this was a cyberpunk world you would totally be correct LOL. Sadly though its a high fantasy D&D world.
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
Half-elf of wood elf extraction, any class with a touch of nature magic about it. Perhaps a subtle Genasi, earth, air or fire. Perhaps he's a human who has been touched by otherworldly power - sorcerer, fey pact Warlock, druid.
If you showed up at my table with that character, I'd be expecting you to play some other character.
As for me, I choose to believe that an extinct thunder lizard is running a game of Dungeons & Dragons via Twitter!
Any reason why in particular? I am honestly interested in how you would expect him to be like.
I honestly won't take offense or be upset if you tell me the reason you don't like him.
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
It isn't the character per se, but you have woven this quasi-supernatural mystique about him that is not really fitting for a beginning level character. Also, he has the slight odor of a Mary Sue character about him and those never turn out well in my experience. Finally, you probably have a long and intricate backstory for this character and, frankly, backstory is the part of the story that wasn't cool enough to be in the game. A character that comes into the game with such a backstory means you are heavily invested in that story and it really leaves no room for character growth and development. So there you go.
As for me, I choose to believe that an extinct thunder lizard is running a game of Dungeons & Dragons via Twitter!
I see the points that you are making and they are genuine concerns for both a players character and the wider game.
The way I have created him though, is rather simple and he doesnt have any long or complicated backstory.
Before he was an adventurer he was pretty much just a peasant. Yes, he was born with this supernatural aura about him that does make him appear different but other than his appearance - it really doesn't have any real possitve effect on his stats or anything.
In actuality it gives him a negative in charisma because people tend to be afraid of the way he looks at first and so mostly people don't want to really get to know him much and sort of ignore him in the hopes that he will just go away.
He was born to good parents, although they were peasants, they were good people and they loved their child despite the way he looks but the other people in his village would blame him for everything that went wrong, other kids would bully him (when they were brave) and nobody really made him feel welcome or that he belonged there with them.
That's why he is an adventurer when he is so young. He left home to travel to different places in the hopes of finding other people like him or at least finding out the reason why he is so different. He hasn't been successful in his quest yet, but it remains a his ultimate goal and his travels brought him naturally into the adventuring life.
He's pretty inexperienced (he is only 17 after all). He had been travelling for a year before he meets the party he eventually joins, so he is a Level 1 character - higher level that the level 0 he was as a peasant before he started out but still just really a beginner.
He does wear hide armour and a thick cloak (which sort of merges into his aura but again it's just cosmetic looks) and he actually found it on a dead bandit. He also found an old rapier of pretty average craftsmanship and a dagger and 50 gold pieces (which he has mostly spent over the last few months since he found them).
I am a little confused still about his class. I wanted him to be a bard because he likes performing but with his low charisma I think he would be a pretty unsuccessful one. Though he does have a natural intelligence. I gave him that because I thought I was important for him to be able to research why he looks the way he looks.
So in reality, apart from his supernatural aura, he is nothing complex or world breaking and is pretty much a blank slate as far as adventuring is concerned.
He could join a level 1 party who I would expect to be a bit stand offish at first because of how he looks but over time (a few sessions) would come to realise that under his menacing looking aura, is actually a pretty nice person who is really just happy to have people who aren't ignoring him or shooing him away (childhood experiences)
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
Fallen aasimar.
I agree with Auberginian, we'd have to have a session zero on your character before the campaign began. The story you've crafted for this character would have been much better realised over the course of a campaign. Perhaps as a warlock, where your pact slowly transforms your character's physical appearance - but the bond's power is too tempting to resist.
Not wanting to trample on your idea, it's just that unusual or, in this case, 'mystic' appearances for the sake of 'being unique' are a personal pet-peeve of mine - particularly when it causes others to be suspicious, wary, or distant. As a DM, it's frustrating to have to fit an outsider into the world. As a player, you'd get frustrated eventually too when there was no adventuring to be had, as - by your own wish - other players would struggle to engage with you, and NPCs won't give you directions to the goblin cave because, in their eyes, you're a freak.
Any level 1 character idea that results in you getting arrested the moment you walk into a town should probably be reconsidered. But chat to your DM, and see what you can work out. Mainly, I'd ask yourself why you want your character's main defining point to be 'looking different', and how you want that to fit into the wider campaign.
In my experience characters that are presented as mysterious or “chosen” are less fun for the group. The player far too often has a set idea of what the characters is and hope for too much of the spotlight. If the others are fine with it, that can work, but it’s seldom a good option. I would rather stress to try and bring elements to the group that allow that character, and the other ones, to become unique down the road, without a blueprint as to how or why. Both as DM and players, story hooks that can engage many, not just one, are good for the campaign and the whole group.
In your example, I would rather see your character as the undistinguished country bumpkin whose much older brother was weird and then just disappeared. Then it’s a story hook the whole group can engage in (where is the brother, why the funky eyes etc) and all can develop from (finding him and solving the why means you all do special stuff and perhaps you get a wonky appearance as well many levels down the road).
BTW, in my mind 17 is not terribly young for an adventurer. Children were generally working quite hard by age 10 in Ye Olde Times, married and starting their own families long before 17.
Back to your regularly scheduled discussion.
Perpetually annoyed that Eldritch Knights can't use Eldritch Blast, Eldritch Smite, and Eldritch Sight.
What are the flaws, traits, bonds, and ideals for the character? That would help get a better picture of the character. A lot of assumptions can be made about the backstory, so I’m trying to clarify where your mind is at.
This seems a sketch more of what a Player wants the character to become, or a sketch for a character in a novel, than an actual playable RPG character.
As a DM, I'd look at that whole last paragraph ( in the OP ), and say "Don't tell me, show me. There are no mechanics for making other players think or feel what you're describing. If you can act well enough to convey that to other Players, then more power to you".
I'd allow the mysterious eye color changes - that seems harmless enough - but in Session 0, I'd also want to know what your character's personality is, what his goals are - what does he want to do.
And that's where it seems to fall apart: you don't seem to have an idea of what you want this character to be, as you summarize the character as "So in reality, apart from his supernatural aura, he is nothing complex or world breaking and is pretty much a blank slate as far as adventuring is concerned".
His whole concept appears to be outsider misunderstood teenager who has been touched by something seeks friends to whom he can relate. So far as I can see, there's no reason for this character to be an adventurer. He could accomplish his goal easily enough being a travelling circus performer, or a courier, or an itinerant farm hand moving from county to county with each season. In fact he's more likely to find people like himself in the circus/carnival world.
One of the few restrictions I have at my table is that you need to create a character who a) Is an adventurer, and b) is willing to adventure in a group - as "outsider characters" who can't/won't mesh with the group cause problems with table dynamics, and to be blunt - if I'm in an adventuring group which has to periodically fight for survival, I need to have ( or quickly develop ) trust that my teammates will have my back because they're part of my team.
I don't get the impression that this character concept fulfills either condition.
It's a suitably dramatic flavor text to describe part of a background for a character, and I think someone with suitable acting talents could brings facets of these ideas to an adventuring character - but as it stands I don't think it's a viable full blown character concept, yet.
My DM Philosophy, as summed up by other people: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rN5w4-azTq3Kbn0Yvk9nfqQhwQ1R5by1/view
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--- sorry for the bad formatting and the way this is written but I am writing it on a mobile device ---
I was trying to make a very misunderstood character, you are correct.
People assume he is some kind of monster, or some Fey-like being or some kind of fiend or something else because of the way he looks. The way he looks make people take a back step but if you can get beyond his outward appearance (which most people don't even try to do) you find a young person who is kind and considerate and will always back you up (though hes quite inexperienced) - he will at least try.
Especially if you get close enough to him to call him a friend.
I had toyed with the idea of him first joining the circus but getting asked to leave as nobody was coming - even in the circus, he was just too different. In the end though, I abandoned that idea because I wanted him to still be a teenager when he started to adventure and set off on his quest to find other people like himself or discover why he was born this way
It seems that most people agree though. Either he is not yet a playable character or it wouldn't be possible to play him in his current form.
I am going to go back and take his character sheet - just to remind myself about the the character that I have created so far - and then start to create him from the start again. I still want to have a misunderstood character but maybe that doesn't have to be because of his appearance. I could just make him a standard human character who is loud, likes performing and playing pranks on people, which sometimes get him into trouble and so people think he is a bad apple or something when he is actually a nice person.
Instead of being judged by some mystical aura , he could be judged because of how he acts instead. So instead of people thinking he is a monster or something, people just think that he is childish and silly and always getting into trouble.
Maybe instead of adventuring to find people like himself - he adventures to get rich because in his inexperienced opinion, if he was rich, people would respect him. This could be like a point of growth, where he realises through his interactions with the rest of his party that people don't necessarily just respect you because your rich but because you're honest, hardworking and reliable and generally a good person who doesn't just act out all the time.
That way I could make him a bard like I wanted him to be and play him through the campaign, slowly growing up and eventually realising (by the end of the campaign) that he doesn't actually want to be an adventurer because he likes performing much, much more and that he doesn't just want to be a bard either. So when the campaign ends he he has become much more mature and grown up and having found his purpose in life decides to set out on his own with the new goal of becoming a folk hero. Sharing his joy of living and through his performances, bringing light and hope to all the forgotten people of the world.
This would be a much different character than I had originally wanted to play and I a not even sure if that would be any better than he was before.
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)
I'm glad you're revisiting your character - it's well worth taking the time to create a character that you, and everyone else, will really enjoy. You'll be playing as him for a long time, dice-rolls considered!
That said, I still think you're being too detailed. The quote from your post has laid out an entire story for your character before you've even started!
Why not create a canvas with a few strokes, rather than saturated with paint? Choose a few traits, bonds, flaws and a loose objective for your character. E.g:
Traits: I'm notoriously cheeky, always tip-toeing the line between an eye-roll and a slap across the face with my quick-wit and cocksure smile
Flaws: I'm not always great at reading people, and my banter and pranks can get me into trouble
Bonds: I want to shake off the shackles of my peasant upbringing. Soon the world will know my name - and the sound of my lute!
And then see where the campaign takes you! Grow your character organically in response to the world. Play to your character, evolve and learn. Have fun exploring your character - something tragic might happen on the adventure that completely changes your character's outlook on life. He might come into great wealth, or plummet into poverty. The exciting part is not knowing.
Most of the people here are touching on a very important aspect in creating a character, you've painted yourself into a corner. You feel that you've left the door open to all these wonderful opportunities and possibilities, but in the end you've almost tied your, and the DM's, hands based on the key points of your design.
As Chequers put it, you'll have to create the broad strokes of your character, and give some thought into the 5 Ws.
Who is your character? I am the unwanted child of a political power, sent off to a military camp to be trained as a soldier.
What does your character hope to achieve? I want to obtain massive power as a sorcerer and use that power to overthrow the government which imprisoned me. From there I will gather others like me to create a new order.
When? This is up to the DM.
Where does this start? This place is held secret by me, only the DM will know. Where does the adventuring start? In a cemetery outside of Neverwinter.
Why is your character adventuring? I was a prisoner who wanted to over throw the current status quo. In my attempt to escape I accidentally opened a planar portal to the abyss. With the assistance of an Imp, we managed to escape into the prime material.
How do you plan to accomplish your goal? I will seek out wizards and sorcerers, their libraries and hidden tomes, learning all I can about the arcane arts. How do I relate to the world? I am apprehensive and defensive around women, I hide my appearance from everyone, and I disguise myself when I interact with people to hide my identity.
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In the end I had to explain a few things to my DM about this character, but I left enough open to let the DM play with this however he felt. I got my Imp familiar, the only request I made due to my description, and I played a Drow Sorcerer for many years. The information I gave to create the character left many open things for the story to go where ever it needed, my story didn't assume anything about the world around me, other than being Drow, and it allowed me to interact with a party without causing problems.
That type of approach to your character is probably going to be best, talking with your DM about what you want to have happen with your character, and RPing the quirks about your character will all take care of reaching that final image you have in your head about what your character will become.
Don't get me wrong - he's interesting as a fictional character. I'm not trying to detract from your imagination.
But fictional characters overlap with, but aren't identical to, playable RPG characters.
My DM Philosophy, as summed up by other people: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rN5w4-azTq3Kbn0Yvk9nfqQhwQ1R5by1/view
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So guys, I have been working at making my character better and more like a playable character than a story character. I have basically, completely redesigned him from the group up. Gone is the dark supernatural aura and the antsy teenage brooding. I also discarded the loner aspect as well and changed his look and feel.
Also, he is now a Bard/Sorcerer multi-class character who draws his power and talents from his Draconic bloodlines.
He is basically an entirely different character than he was before, but he seems to be much more playable now and I am actually excited about finishing his backstory, which is all I have left to do. He is pretty much finished now though and so I thought that I would share him with you https://ddb.ac/characters/4299128/2o5SQv because I am excited to hear what you guys think of him now, compared to the ideas that I had before.
Also, anything else you would care to share about his redesign would be greatly appreciated.
Looking forward to reading all your comments and opinions on him now.
I am an online author and sci-fi lover who plays table too roleplaying games in his free time. See all my character concepts at: Character Bios – Jays Blog (jaytelford.me)