A Casual Venture Into Another Timeline…

Rascal runs over to the control room and answers. "Hello. Hello. Who's this?"

<input> $ HELLO; HELLO; WHO IS THIS;         
<output> $ I AM SPEX; YOUR ONBOARD ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE ASSISTANT; I HAVE NOTED A MAJOR DECISION THAT COULD IMPACT THE FATE OF THE MISSION; WOULD YOU LIKE MY INPUT;    
<input> $

Kiki silently nods his head in the affirmative.

"Yes. We would like your assistance." Rascal says to the machine.

<input> $ YES; WE WOULD LIKE YOUR ASSISTANCE;       
<output> $ RUNNING BIOMETRICS SCAN ON APHELION II;        
<output-biometricsResult> $ CURRENT LIFEFORM POPULATION PERCANTAGE ON APHELION II IS;      
$ 78.8% HUMAN      
$ 11.9% ELF  
$ 2.4% DWARF        
$ 2.2% TIEFLING      
$ 1.4% OTHER RACES   
$ 3.3% [Redacted]
$ 0.00000001% TAR

Rascal says "Huh? What? Am I the 'Other Races'?  I'M A KITTEH. Geeeeees." (getting frustrated at the machine) <I'm cool with it, just having fun ;-) >

Breathing to calm down

"Ok, what is the 3.3% Redacted?" 

<input> OK; WHAT IS THE 3.3 PERCENT REDACTED;       
<output> THE [Redacted] ARE A [Redacted] ORIGINATING FROM [Redacted]; WHO COMMONLY [Redacted] IN ADDITION TO [Redacted] OTHER [Redacted];

Kiki just says " [Redacted] [Redacted] [Redacted] [Redacted] [Redacted] and double [Redacted]"

Rascal nods to Kiki's summary.

<inputSituational> $ 1001110010100011101010110101   
<output> $ THE ESTIMATED SUCCESS RATE OF AN EXCURSION ON APHELION II IS 87.6%; DOES THE PILOT WISH TO CHART COURSE FOR APHELION II;

Kiki says "88% is too low so no."

"I do want to live forever"

<input> $ I DO WANT TO LIVE FOREVER;      
<output> $ HOLD STILL;

a robotic arm emerges from the ceiling and injects you with something as fast as lightning.

<output> $ YOU MAY NOW LIVE FOREVER;

Kiki says  "Ouch that hurt."

<input> $ OUCH THAT HURT;       
<output> $ WOULD YOU LIKE TO STOP FEELING PAIN AS WELL;

the mechanical arm looms ominously overhead.

Kiki nods his head no.

<inputSituational> $ 1001110011100011100

<output> $ YOU SADDEN ME; RECCOMENDED COURSE OF ACTION IS TO GO TO APHELION II AND TAKE SAMPLES OF THE LOCAL TAR AND STUDY IT FOR ARCANE INFLUENCE; TAR HAS BEEN SEEN ON 93.5% OF PLANETS THAT HAVE DISAPPEARED;

<output2> OF COURSE; THE CHOICE IS YOURS PILOT; BUT DO NOT COMPROMISE THE MISSION OR INFRINGE ON THE GREATER INTRESTS OF THE COMPANY;

”Wow an AI without prime directive safeties.  Don’t upset the ship.  Once I had a talking rock…”

Saul gets a far off look on his face, “Well let’s get to Aphelion II seems we’ve gotta discover this sticky tar connection.”

Kiki says, "I bet you can find a plant like type of grass on 100% of the planets as well, should we investigate Grass like plants as well?"

Saul looks at Kiki and mimes cutting his throat, “Oh great ship brain- I believe what Kiki is saying is yes we’ve got lots of investigating.”  Saul watches in horror hoping the AI controlled robot arms don’t try to rehabilitate Kiki into a ‘good’ pilot!

Kiki nods a thank you due to his failure in understanding.