A small glimmer of light presents itself in the distance as you approach. It would almost be unsettling if it wasn't followed quickly by a loud familiar voice.
"Another 5 minutes in this direction and I should be back at the camp." HELIOS is heard saying as the beacon of light in his hand slowly becomes more visible. Upon spotting the rest of the group he rushes up to them finally dropping his arm back down to a resting position.
"I was unable to locate an entrance to the sewers. By my logic that would mean the only option would be to scale the broken wall to the east. The sewers are no longer an option. East should be this way" he says pointing across his body to the East. "Awaiting your command Sergeant."
Buoyside is eager to get to the battle, he walks briskly, his enormous sword constantly dragging in the muck behind him. He fantasizes of chopping down enemies without mercy, the guts, the screams, all that shit. He needs to get there before he grows soft, before the other one comes back with his stupid ****in' smile and empathy, his selflessness. If he shows up, I'll miss the whole party. I'll be a ******* field medic, a motivational speaker. I'll be tongue deep in the enemies' ****. That can't happen.
He turns to the group, "will you ********ers hurry up? We're missing--" He suddenly jerks his head back around towards the glowing light. "Look alive!" He cries as he forcefully whips his sword to the side in a large arc across his body, throwing the sheath from the blade. It hurls nearly 15 feet before slamming down in the mud, he holds the blade up ready to attack, only to be greeted by the chattering construct. He lowers the blade, looks dejectedly back to the group before trudging over to retrieve his sheath. He slides his hand along the length to clear the mud from it. "I...I, ****...I'm gonna need someones help to get this thing back on."
Ryloos's follows along with the collective group, attempting to cover her wounded pride from her jumbled spell. Her shame is just about forgotten as soon as she recognizes several familiarly worn stones on the White Road. However, something feels off. It is as if the fog is the corrupting everything around and within her. This bothers her on a level she can barely rationalize. This ******* fog. Taken so much from me and still it takes more. She clears all thoughts from her mind focusing on the task at hand.
As Helios rejoins the group, she hears what the sun-imbued mechanism says. If it is over the east wall, they must go she will ensure that they make their way as intelligently as possible. She'll save that til the time comes. She looks to Lofty skeptically.
"Right, ah" Lofty stoops to pick up the discarded sheath and holds it steady while addressing the warforged. "Excellent scouting there soldier, lead the way." He wonders, not for the first time, what the metal warrior is thinking. There aren't many folks brave enough to walk into the mist alone and Helios treated it like an errand. Was it bravery, did it know fear?
The eerily drawn out rasp of Bouyside's blade sliding home shakes him from his reverie. "I've got a tainted health potion for the first soldier to climb into the breach and secure a rope for the rest of us."
"Yes Sergeant. Please follow me this way." HELIOS raises his hand high above his head, reforming the ball of energy as a light to lead the lost. He heads deeper back into the fog to the East towards where the wall and the collapsed parapet were told to be. "I should have no problem scaling the wall upon arrival, I was built to be quick and agile and as a result can scour vertical surfaces with ease. Just provide me with a rope and I will find a place to secure it."
Keep a close eye on the surroundings as he walks forward HELIOS attempts to guide the group forward to their destination.
The fog covers the plains between the camp and the high walls of the city. As you progress forward, you occasionally stray from the White Road...and would have been lost, had it not been for Ryloos' keen eyes. Reoriented, you follow the White Road for a time. Unfortunately, the fog is so thick that you can barely see one another. You know that your trajectory should place you on the trail of the saints and the landsknecht, that the front - and with it, a number of friendly faces - should be somewhere ahead. Instead, you become increasingly more and more disoriented. The sounds of battle seemingly grow more distant until you are surrounded by a deafening silence. A massive object looms in the fog; after an initial panic, you realize that it is merely a ruined, abandoned siege engine. Its wooden boards, painted the brilliant colors of Ardun Ghariba, are shattered and splintered in such a way that it suggests an impact of tremendous force.
HELIOS
You note dispassionately that the boards bear large, linear incisions consistent with an enormous, serrated claw. You are unfamiliar with the exact identity of the beast, but deduce that it is likely quadrupedal and supranatural. And capable of overwhelming violence. You all note a surprisingly lack of corpses in the siege engine, an incongruity that your sentience algorithm attempts to parse several times unsuccessfully before accepting it as a epistemological blackbox.
ALL
What appears to be snow begins to fall from the sky. It breaks lightly on your skin, but does not feel cold. You stand there - looking up to the sky, precipitate dusting your face - when you hear the squelch of a boot in the sodden slurry of grass and mud behind you.
"it appears something large and very dangerous caused the destruction of this siege engine. I bet it would make for a mo..." As Lofty's command comes HELIOS turns around with what seems like an unnatural speed, and breaks into a prepared, defensive stance, a small ball of energy forming in each hand. Unlike the energy before, this time it seems to have the intensity of a great fire instead of just a soft bright light.
"st formidable opponent. Even with our numbers, the sheer size of this beast is something to watch out for." He finishes his statement without any hesitation. If you hadn't seen him spin to attention mid sentence one might have assumed he didn't even hear the Sergeants words.
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Xantlin stands idly by, observing the massive destroyed weapon and attempting to figure out the source of the warm snow, when he hears the sudden sound being the group. He quickly spins around, though not as quickly as the supernatural spin of HELIOS, drawing his mace and preparing for whatever comes. The fog continues to make the surroundings a mystery, he tries to figure out what approaches.
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Buoyside turns to the sound, readying his blade but not unsheathing again...he can't bear the embarrassment of a premature unsheathing again. "Come, mother****er!" He hollers into the mist. "Your ashen snow is not a bother to the WUSS, you gaudy queen!"
Ryloos quickly stands guard with the rest of the group, wielding her rapier. She takes notes the discrepancy between her armor and the rest of her compatriots. "No problem, I'll just have to adjust," she whispers to herself. She eyes the mist surrounding them. Something primal stirs within her as she looks upon the siege engine for a moment. Her eyes fall upon Helios and for the first time, she is glad to witness the machine and his power.
From out of the mist stumbles one of the landsknecht, dressed in bright blues and purples. He appears...intoxicated, his gait ataxic and unbalanced. He woozily leers at your group, standing as you are in a loose semi-circle, before winking salaciously at Ryloos. He takes a step forward...
...and collapses to the ground, his back a mess of shorn ribbons of flesh, blood pouring from countless cruel lacerations.
It is at this moment that you are ambushed by the leathchinn.
They come out of the fog so suddenly that your group is blindsided - first two, then four, then six creatures come stumbling out of the fog. At first glance, they might pass for a man; after all, they still bear the livery and pinions of their home provinces and many are still clad in mail or leather armor. But the illusion is quickly dispelled; their limbs bend at unnatural angles (and often not where a joint would anatomically lie), their gait staggering and unstable. Their faces...well, their faces will haunt your dreams: stretched perpetually in a voiceless scream of agony, their expressions bespeak a horrific and unspeakably painful death. Without a sound, the leathchinn wordlessly waylay you.
One of the beasts surprises HELIOS from behind, wrapping its shockingly strong arms around your chest. Helpless, you are pulled away from the group and into the fog.
FIGHT TIME BABY.
For practical purposes, the remaining four of you are standing in a group, roughly five feet apart. There are six leathchinn in your midst, one of whom is noticeably larger and more hideous than the others. HELIOS is roughly 10 feet away, though you are uncertain of which direction he has been moved. He is not currently visible to you due to the thick fog.
The leathchinn use the same stats as your usual zombie. The big one is identical to the others, save that its HP pool is 30, its strength is 16 (+3), and its armor class is 12.
You can attack in any order. Specify your target by giving them a number (i.e., "leathcheann #5") with leathcheann #1 being the closest to your group and leathcheann #6 being the superzombie.
HELIOS, you will need to succeed either an athletics check (strength), acrobatics check (dexterity), or persuasion check (charisma) to escape the leathcheann's grasp. We'll say the DC remains at 10. I really am shocked that you failed that damn grapple - I even used dexterity as your saving throw! Escaping a grapple serves as your action for a turn. If you fail to escape, you cannot move or act otherwise.
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
HELIOS is ashamed to be taken unaware. He attempts to kick back at the leg of the leathcheann that grabbed him and break the grapple.
Acrobatics check - 11
Succeeding to knock the foul creature off balance with the kick he quickly rolls forward onto the ground turning to face the leathcheann and reforming the radiant energy in his hands.
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
Damage roll - 6
Ryloos bull-rushes leathceann #1 wielding her rapier in her right hand. As the undead lunges at her, she slides to its right and swings up: lopping off the zombie's right leg. In what appears as one swift movement, Ryloos's foot catches an upturned stone of the White Road which she uses to stop, turn and bring her rapier down across the beast's back. Unfortunately, the stone is a foot too far from where the beast falls and she only leaves a shallow slash from its right shoulder to left hip.
Sergeant Lofty places a hand on Bouyside's shoulder. The big man was in one of his foul moods, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Lofty focuses on the well of power within himself and begins to draw from it, siphoning as much of that volatile energy as he can into the paladin beside him. "I think they want to fight you." Bouyside shimmers for a moment and begins to grow rapidly until he's roughly the size of a barn. "The fools."
I cast Enlarge on Bouyside. His sword is enormous.
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
It seems only natural to let the now even more enormous Bouyside lead the line, so Xantlin makes a quick jump back and to the side of the giant, ensuring he is far enough away to avoid a wayward swing of his outrageous sword.
Fearing Ryloos's charge into battle may have been a bit hasty, Xantlin decides to support her in attacking leathcheann #1 with a Firebolt
This post has potentially manipulated dice roll results.
3
With a murmur and a flick of the wrist, Xantlin conjures a firebolt that flies through the air and smashes into leathcheann #1 in the beast's midsection.
Buoyside’s eyes light up with joy as he watches his enormous blade extend, growing out to an absolute unit 18 feet. It isn’t until he looks down on Lofty before he realizes that his entire being has doubled in size. He laughs a deep, hearty laugh. “I am now your lord. I am a powerhorse, I am the moon, the sun and the stars.” He raises his sword high into the air “I smite you, you decrepid husk!”
he brings the sword down on zombie #2.
(I rolled a 19, I don’t know how to copy and paste it here. Matt, you can check my JohnRoep orokos to confirm)
the enormous blade smashes into the rotting creature, pounding it into the ground and sending large chunks of the earth out in an explosive shockwave.
Damage: 15 (14 on initial roll (I accidentally did 1d10+7 on my roll, should have been 1d10+4 so I subtracted 3 from the 14 I rolled. Then the extra 1d4 for being big and got a 4. Sorry this got messy)
The first leathcheann does not so much collapse as involute, a smoldering ruin of a corpse.
Is the zombie dead? (DC 19 [5+14]) 12That's one dead zombarg.
It collapses to the ground and, after a moment of writhing, lies still. Forever. The smell of its burning flesh is cloying.
ZOMBIE 2 - BUOYSIDE
The second beast races forward only to be pulverized by Buoyside's now enormous blade. Its bones are shattered, its rotting flesh mashed into a jellied pulp. It lies in its crater, a quivering mess of stale blood and bent limbs...but then begins its inexorable crawl forward, its progress undiminished.
The creature feebly attempts to grab your ankles, but its pulverized frame little affords it the mobility or dexterity necessary to attack. It merely begins gnawing on the corner of your immense boot.
ZOMBIE 3 - RYLOOS
Your fancy, high-falootin' attacks may have may short work of the zombie, but they leave you exposed to attack. Leathcheann #3 races towards your back, arms outstretched.
You manage to sidestep the first leathcheann, its idiot legs carrying it stumbling past you. You are less fortunate with the second creature, however. It strikes you - some might use the word "slap," even - directly across the face, dislodging a tooth and filling your mouth with the taste of blood.
ZOMBIE 6 - HELIOS
The bastard stands a full two feet above you - you appreciate that he must have been a colossus as a living man. Like the other leathchinn, he is mute; and mutely, he throws himself into the task before him. Namely, murdering you.
The beast's first blow strikes you in your armored chassis. You correctly assess that you have sustained no structural damage. However, as you shift your weight to spin away from the leathcheann, it swings a second time.
This second blow lands on one of the articulation points of your body's fuselage. These joints are somewhat weaker than the plates they connect, and you feel the weld yield dangerously. Your sentience algorithm estimates roughly 5% reduction in your overall operational functionality.
You may feel neglected, Lofty, but there are other things lurking in the fog. And they are coming for you.
A small glimmer of light presents itself in the distance as you approach. It would almost be unsettling if it wasn't followed quickly by a loud familiar voice.
"Another 5 minutes in this direction and I should be back at the camp." HELIOS is heard saying as the beacon of light in his hand slowly becomes more visible. Upon spotting the rest of the group he rushes up to them finally dropping his arm back down to a resting position.
"I was unable to locate an entrance to the sewers. By my logic that would mean the only option would be to scale the broken wall to the east. The sewers are no longer an option. East should be this way" he says pointing across his body to the East. "Awaiting your command Sergeant."
H.E.L.I.O.S - Warforged Sun Soul Monk
AC - 19
Buoyside is eager to get to the battle, he walks briskly, his enormous sword constantly dragging in the muck behind him. He fantasizes of chopping down enemies without mercy, the guts, the screams, all that shit. He needs to get there before he grows soft, before the other one comes back with his stupid ****in' smile and empathy, his selflessness. If he shows up, I'll miss the whole party. I'll be a ******* field medic, a motivational speaker. I'll be tongue deep in the enemies' ****. That can't happen.
He turns to the group, "will you ********ers hurry up? We're missing--" He suddenly jerks his head back around towards the glowing light. "Look alive!" He cries as he forcefully whips his sword to the side in a large arc across his body, throwing the sheath from the blade. It hurls nearly 15 feet before slamming down in the mud, he holds the blade up ready to attack, only to be greeted by the chattering construct. He lowers the blade, looks dejectedly back to the group before trudging over to retrieve his sheath. He slides his hand along the length to clear the mud from it. "I...I, ****...I'm gonna need someones help to get this thing back on."
Character Sheet
AC: 16
Ryloos's follows along with the collective group, attempting to cover her wounded pride from her jumbled spell. Her shame is just about forgotten as soon as she recognizes several familiarly worn stones on the White Road. However, something feels off. It is as if the fog is the corrupting everything around and within her. This bothers her on a level she can barely rationalize. This ******* fog. Taken so much from me and still it takes more. She clears all thoughts from her mind focusing on the task at hand.
As Helios rejoins the group, she hears what the sun-imbued mechanism says. If it is over the east wall, they must go she will ensure that they make their way as intelligently as possible. She'll save that til the time comes. She looks to Lofty skeptically.
"Right, ah" Lofty stoops to pick up the discarded sheath and holds it steady while addressing the warforged. "Excellent scouting there soldier, lead the way." He wonders, not for the first time, what the metal warrior is thinking. There aren't many folks brave enough to walk into the mist alone and Helios treated it like an errand. Was it bravery, did it know fear?
The eerily drawn out rasp of Bouyside's blade sliding home shakes him from his reverie. "I've got a tainted health potion for the first soldier to climb into the breach and secure a rope for the rest of us."
Character Sheets: Page1 Page2 Page3
HP: 35 AC: 20 Saves: Str+2 Dex+0 Con+4 Int+2 Wis+2 Cha+6
"Yes Sergeant. Please follow me this way." HELIOS raises his hand high above his head, reforming the ball of energy as a light to lead the lost. He heads deeper back into the fog to the East towards where the wall and the collapsed parapet were told to be. "I should have no problem scaling the wall upon arrival, I was built to be quick and agile and as a result can scour vertical surfaces with ease. Just provide me with a rope and I will find a place to secure it."
Keep a close eye on the surroundings as he walks forward HELIOS attempts to guide the group forward to their destination.
Perception check - 8
Survival check - 18
H.E.L.I.O.S - Warforged Sun Soul Monk
AC - 19
ALL
The fog covers the plains between the camp and the high walls of the city. As you progress forward, you occasionally stray from the White Road...and would have been lost, had it not been for Ryloos' keen eyes. Reoriented, you follow the White Road for a time. Unfortunately, the fog is so thick that you can barely see one another. You know that your trajectory should place you on the trail of the saints and the landsknecht, that the front - and with it, a number of friendly faces - should be somewhere ahead. Instead, you become increasingly more and more disoriented. The sounds of battle seemingly grow more distant until you are surrounded by a deafening silence. A massive object looms in the fog; after an initial panic, you realize that it is merely a ruined, abandoned siege engine. Its wooden boards, painted the brilliant colors of Ardun Ghariba, are shattered and splintered in such a way that it suggests an impact of tremendous force.
HELIOS
You note dispassionately that the boards bear large, linear incisions consistent with an enormous, serrated claw. You are unfamiliar with the exact identity of the beast, but deduce that it is likely quadrupedal and supranatural. And capable of overwhelming violence. You all note a surprisingly lack of corpses in the siege engine, an incongruity that your sentience algorithm attempts to parse several times unsuccessfully before accepting it as a epistemological blackbox.
ALL
What appears to be snow begins to fall from the sky. It breaks lightly on your skin, but does not feel cold. You stand there - looking up to the sky, precipitate dusting your face - when you hear the squelch of a boot in the sodden slurry of grass and mud behind you.
"About face!" Lofty shouts, whipping the shield from his back. He reverses grip on his spear as he turns, lifting it into a throwing position.
Character Sheets: Page1 Page2 Page3
HP: 35 AC: 20 Saves: Str+2 Dex+0 Con+4 Int+2 Wis+2 Cha+6
"it appears something large and very dangerous caused the destruction of this siege engine. I bet it would make for a mo..." As Lofty's command comes HELIOS turns around with what seems like an unnatural speed, and breaks into a prepared, defensive stance, a small ball of energy forming in each hand. Unlike the energy before, this time it seems to have the intensity of a great fire instead of just a soft bright light.
"st formidable opponent. Even with our numbers, the sheer size of this beast is something to watch out for." He finishes his statement without any hesitation. If you hadn't seen him spin to attention mid sentence one might have assumed he didn't even hear the Sergeants words.
H.E.L.I.O.S - Warforged Sun Soul Monk
AC - 19
Xantlin stands idly by, observing the massive destroyed weapon and attempting to figure out the source of the warm snow, when he hears the sudden sound being the group. He quickly spins around, though not as quickly as the supernatural spin of HELIOS, drawing his mace and preparing for whatever comes. The fog continues to make the surroundings a mystery, he tries to figure out what approaches.
Perception check - 23
Xantlin Pegason (imgur)
33/33 HP
4/4 level 1 spells, 3/3 level 2 spells, 2/2 level 3 spells
AC = 15, Spell attack bonus = 7, spell save DC = 15
Buoyside turns to the sound, readying his blade but not unsheathing again...he can't bear the embarrassment of a premature unsheathing again. "Come, mother****er!" He hollers into the mist. "Your ashen snow is not a bother to the WUSS, you gaudy queen!"
Intimidation check - 15
Character Sheet
AC: 16
Ryloos quickly stands guard with the rest of the group, wielding her rapier. She takes notes the discrepancy between her armor and the rest of her compatriots. "No problem, I'll just have to adjust," she whispers to herself. She eyes the mist surrounding them. Something primal stirs within her as she looks upon the siege engine for a moment. Her eyes fall upon Helios and for the first time, she is glad to witness the machine and his power.
ALL
From out of the mist stumbles one of the landsknecht, dressed in bright blues and purples. He appears...intoxicated, his gait ataxic and unbalanced. He woozily leers at your group, standing as you are in a loose semi-circle, before winking salaciously at Ryloos. He takes a step forward...
...and collapses to the ground, his back a mess of shorn ribbons of flesh, blood pouring from countless cruel lacerations.
It is at this moment that you are ambushed by the leathchinn.
Who gets grabbed? (Lofty = 1, Ryloos = 2, Xantlin = 3, Buoyside = 4, HELIOS = 5) 5
HELIOS saving throw (DC 10) 7
They come out of the fog so suddenly that your group is blindsided - first two, then four, then six creatures come stumbling out of the fog. At first glance, they might pass for a man; after all, they still bear the livery and pinions of their home provinces and many are still clad in mail or leather armor. But the illusion is quickly dispelled; their limbs bend at unnatural angles (and often not where a joint would anatomically lie), their gait staggering and unstable. Their faces...well, their faces will haunt your dreams: stretched perpetually in a voiceless scream of agony, their expressions bespeak a horrific and unspeakably painful death. Without a sound, the leathchinn wordlessly waylay you.
One of the beasts surprises HELIOS from behind, wrapping its shockingly strong arms around your chest. Helpless, you are pulled away from the group and into the fog.
FIGHT TIME BABY.
For practical purposes, the remaining four of you are standing in a group, roughly five feet apart. There are six leathchinn in your midst, one of whom is noticeably larger and more hideous than the others. HELIOS is roughly 10 feet away, though you are uncertain of which direction he has been moved. He is not currently visible to you due to the thick fog.
The leathchinn use the same stats as your usual zombie. The big one is identical to the others, save that its HP pool is 30, its strength is 16 (+3), and its armor class is 12.
You can attack in any order. Specify your target by giving them a number (i.e., "leathcheann #5") with leathcheann #1 being the closest to your group and leathcheann #6 being the superzombie.
HELIOS, you will need to succeed either an athletics check (strength), acrobatics check (dexterity), or persuasion check (charisma) to escape the leathcheann's grasp. We'll say the DC remains at 10. I really am shocked that you failed that damn grapple - I even used dexterity as your saving throw! Escaping a grapple serves as your action for a turn. If you fail to escape, you cannot move or act otherwise.
HELIOS is ashamed to be taken unaware. He attempts to kick back at the leg of the leathcheann that grabbed him and break the grapple.
Acrobatics check - 11
Succeeding to knock the foul creature off balance with the kick he quickly rolls forward onto the ground turning to face the leathcheann and reforming the radiant energy in his hands.
H.E.L.I.O.S - Warforged Sun Soul Monk
AC - 19
Ryloos's anger peaks and she snaps to action. Breaking formation, she charges at leathcheann #1 and attacks.
Hit attack - 23
Damage roll - 6
Ryloos bull-rushes leathceann #1 wielding her rapier in her right hand. As the undead lunges at her, she slides to its right and swings up: lopping off the zombie's right leg. In what appears as one swift movement, Ryloos's foot catches an upturned stone of the White Road which she uses to stop, turn and bring her rapier down across the beast's back. Unfortunately, the stone is a foot too far from where the beast falls and she only leaves a shallow slash from its right shoulder to left hip.
Sergeant Lofty places a hand on Bouyside's shoulder. The big man was in one of his foul moods, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Lofty focuses on the well of power within himself and begins to draw from it, siphoning as much of that volatile energy as he can into the paladin beside him. "I think they want to fight you." Bouyside shimmers for a moment and begins to grow rapidly until he's roughly the size of a barn. "The fools."
I cast Enlarge on Bouyside. His sword is enormous.
Character Sheets: Page1 Page2 Page3
HP: 35 AC: 20 Saves: Str+2 Dex+0 Con+4 Int+2 Wis+2 Cha+6
It seems only natural to let the now even more enormous Bouyside lead the line, so Xantlin makes a quick jump back and to the side of the giant, ensuring he is far enough away to avoid a wayward swing of his outrageous sword.
Fearing Ryloos's charge into battle may have been a bit hasty, Xantlin decides to support her in attacking leathcheann #1 with a Firebolt
Spell attack - 26
Xantlin Pegason (imgur)
33/33 HP
4/4 level 1 spells, 3/3 level 2 spells, 2/2 level 3 spells
AC = 15, Spell attack bonus = 7, spell save DC = 15
3
With a murmur and a flick of the wrist, Xantlin conjures a firebolt that flies through the air and smashes into leathcheann #1 in the beast's midsection.
Xantlin Pegason (imgur)
33/33 HP
4/4 level 1 spells, 3/3 level 2 spells, 2/2 level 3 spells
AC = 15, Spell attack bonus = 7, spell save DC = 15
Buoyside’s eyes light up with joy as he watches his enormous blade extend, growing out to an absolute unit 18 feet. It isn’t until he looks down on Lofty before he realizes that his entire being has doubled in size. He laughs a deep, hearty laugh. “I am now your lord. I am a powerhorse, I am the moon, the sun and the stars.” He raises his sword high into the air “I smite you, you decrepid husk!”
he brings the sword down on zombie #2.
(I rolled a 19, I don’t know how to copy and paste it here. Matt, you can check my JohnRoep orokos to confirm)
the enormous blade smashes into the rotting creature, pounding it into the ground and sending large chunks of the earth out in an explosive shockwave.
Damage: 15 (14 on initial roll (I accidentally did 1d10+7 on my roll, should have been 1d10+4 so I subtracted 3 from the 14 I rolled. Then the extra 1d4 for being big and got a 4. Sorry this got messy)
Character Sheet
AC: 16
Hot damn.
ZOMBIE 1
The first leathcheann does not so much collapse as involute, a smoldering ruin of a corpse.
Is the zombie dead? (DC 19 [5+14]) 12 That's one dead zombarg.
It collapses to the ground and, after a moment of writhing, lies still. Forever. The smell of its burning flesh is cloying.
ZOMBIE 2 - BUOYSIDE
The second beast races forward only to be pulverized by Buoyside's now enormous blade. Its bones are shattered, its rotting flesh mashed into a jellied pulp. It lies in its crater, a quivering mess of stale blood and bent limbs...but then begins its inexorable crawl forward, its progress undiminished.
Zombie attack? (Buoyside AC 16) 4
The creature feebly attempts to grab your ankles, but its pulverized frame little affords it the mobility or dexterity necessary to attack. It merely begins gnawing on the corner of your immense boot.
ZOMBIE 3 - RYLOOS
Your fancy, high-falootin' attacks may have may short work of the zombie, but they leave you exposed to attack. Leathcheann #3 races towards your back, arms outstretched.
Zombie attack? (Ryloos AC 15) 18
Zombie damage? (Ryloos HP 38) 4
The beast slams into you from behind, sending you stumbling forward. Its claws rake your arm, drawing blood.
ZOMBIE 4 & 5 - XANTLIN
Nothing instills hatred in the undead such as a cleric. The remaining two corpses race toward you, slack-jawed and silent.
Zombie attack? (Xantlin AC 15) 22, 8
Zombie damage? (Xantlin HP 33) 3
You manage to sidestep the first leathcheann, its idiot legs carrying it stumbling past you. You are less fortunate with the second creature, however. It strikes you - some might use the word "slap," even - directly across the face, dislodging a tooth and filling your mouth with the taste of blood.
ZOMBIE 6 - HELIOS
The bastard stands a full two feet above you - you appreciate that he must have been a colossus as a living man. Like the other leathchinn, he is mute; and mutely, he throws himself into the task before him. Namely, murdering you.
Zombie attack? (HELIOS DC 19) 16
The beast's first blow strikes you in your armored chassis. You correctly assess that you have sustained no structural damage. However, as you shift your weight to spin away from the leathcheann, it swings a second time.
Zombie attack? (HELIOS DC 19) 22
Zombie damage? (HELIOS HP 43) 7
This second blow lands on one of the articulation points of your body's fuselage. These joints are somewhat weaker than the plates they connect, and you feel the weld yield dangerously. Your sentience algorithm estimates roughly 5% reduction in your overall operational functionality.
You may feel neglected, Lofty, but there are other things lurking in the fog. And they are coming for you.