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Baal.

I‘m so sorry you have to deal with sh!t like that from your family, who are supposed to be the most supportive people in your life and cheering you on the whole way. That‘s godawful that they are treating you as a burden and leveraging your position in the family against you. I‘m sorry. I don‘t think there‘s any way I can make it better, but we‘re all here for you on ddb. Don‘t forget that. You‘re an amazing person, and while you have made mistakes, you have really interesting character concepts, threads, and fun interactions with other members of our amazing community here. Please stay safe and find help if you can, I know that sometimes talking isn‘t the right answer, but occasionally it is. Have you tried reaching out to your family about this?

If you ever need to rant, you know where to find me. Sorry for not responding earlier, I‘m in Scotland rn.

 I hear Scotland! I have mostly Scottish heritage.

 Scotland has always seemed cool to me. I love the accents

If I was forced to move to a different country that would be probably be pretty high on my list. I realize "forced" doesn't sound like I'd like it but most people don't just move countries for no reason obviously

(If I had to move states I'd go to Maine, countries I'd go to Canada, and If I had to move somewhere besides Canada I'd to go to Europe. Most of the countries are cool but somewhere in the UK or Scandinavia would probably be my first picks)

 Why Maine?

 Is there something you have against Maine?

Well, a couple of reasons
1. Its in New England, which is an area I already live in. While I would be far from where my family lives it would still be close enough to make several visits a year. Obviously I live there so I'm biased but New England is really one of the only large areas in America I like. I have no sense of connection established with other areas of the U.S. (no offense to other parts of the U.S.)
2. I really appreciate nature, and Maine has great forests and wildlife from what I've seen
3. It's colder than other parts of New England, but it still gets warm in the summer. I enjoy the colder months a lot

Those are the major reasons

funny enough most of those reasons also translate to why I'd choose to move to Canada as a first pick If I had to move countries, its America's neighbour and shares more culture than Europe, goo wildlife, cold
The only difference is Canada comes with more downsides than Maine

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Baal.

I‘m so sorry you have to deal with sh!t like that from your family, who are supposed to be the most supportive people in your life and cheering you on the whole way. That‘s godawful that they are treating you as a burden and leveraging your position in the family against you. I‘m sorry. I don‘t think there‘s any way I can make it better, but we‘re all here for you on ddb. Don‘t forget that. You‘re an amazing person, and while you have made mistakes, you have really interesting character concepts, threads, and fun interactions with other members of our amazing community here. Please stay safe and find help if you can, I know that sometimes talking isn‘t the right answer, but occasionally it is. Have you tried reaching out to your family about this?

If you ever need to rant, you know where to find me. Sorry for not responding earlier, I‘m in Scotland rn.

 I hear Scotland! I have mostly Scottish heritage.

 Scotland has always seemed cool to me. I love the accents

If I was forced to move to a different country that would be probably be pretty high on my list. I realize "forced" doesn't sound like I'd like it but most people don't just move countries for no reason obviously

(If I had to move states I'd go to Maine, countries I'd go to Canada, and If I had to move somewhere besides Canada I'd to go to Europe. Most of the countries are cool but somewhere in the UK or Scandinavia would probably be my first picks)

 Why Maine?

 Is there something you have against Maine?

Well, a couple of reasons
1. Its in New England, which is an area I already live in. While I would be far from where my family lives it would still be close enough to make several visits a year. Obviously I live there so I'm biased but New England is really one of the only large areas in America I like. I have no sense of connection established with other areas of the U.S. (no offense to other parts of the U.S.)
2. I really appreciate nature, and Maine has great forests and wildlife from what I've seen
3. It's colder than other parts of New England, but it still gets warm in the summer. I enjoy the colder months a lot

Those are the major reasons

funny enough most of those reasons also translate to why I'd choose to move to Canada as a first pick If I had to move countries, its America's neighbour and shares more culture than Europe, goo wildlife, cold
The only difference is Canada comes with more downsides than Maine

 Yes, I do have something against Maine. Primarily because other than the nature, there’s nothing. And even then, if I want nature, I can go to a state that actually has interesting things, like Washington, Oregon, or Virginia. It’s just a bland and boring place to be. Also, where have you been outside of New England, because in my opinion, it’s one of the more boring parts of the US. It’s only real draws are Boston, Ivy Leagues and proximity to a far more interesting state ( New York )

Maine doesn’t have as many people as the average state, which does make it more lonely I agree

New England isnt boring

really I think pretty much the entirety of the East and west coast are cool. I like the northeast, but there are flaws. I’m sure whatever state of choice you have has a ton of haters as well. Every state has strengths and weaknesses. 
I love Nature, the cold, and a slightly more chill area population wise. So I like New England

AAAAAH IM NOT GONNA SLEEP

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I found out about Pintrest Wellbeing and I nearly cried. They put that there for people like me who are struggling.

I just want to thank God for this, and thank you all for being here for me.

 yeah... pinterest wellbeing is amazing <3

Quote from Baalzeboop >>

I'm gonna vent for a second.

My soul hurts.

My mom called my DMing a disappointment. She does not have the right to say that when she left the session a quarterway through the session to take a phone call.

I fight so hard to want to live, to feel good about anything, to feel loved. I tried to talk to them about this stuff, I tried to be reasonable, I tried to be forceful, but everything I do just makes them mad at me and there's nothing I can do about it.

All this stupid world building and character creation and EVERYTHING isn't just an aspect of my life, it is my life. Everything else exists to supplement my work.

And no one that lives with me has a thing to say about it. They don't care. They so, so obviously do not care.

They think I'm a burden. A burden they love, but a burden still.

I'm not. Why is it that you guys know this but not my family? 

My mom told me that if something happened to me, it would destroy the family. I don't want to hurt myself, and I certainly don't want to die, but they don't get to tell me how important I am then rip into me with every conversation. They don't get to tell me I'm not good enough when they never taught me the actual standard, let alone how to measure it or reach it.

I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say.

It hurts so much and I can't stand it.

 I'm so sorry... I understand the feeling. I'm always here to talk if you need me, Baal.

Quote from PJtheARCH3R >>

Maine doesn’t have as many people as the average state, which does make it more lonely I agree

New England isnt boring

 

really I think pretty much the entirety of the East and west coast are cool. I like the northeast, but there are flaws. I’m sure whatever state of choice you have has a ton of haters as well. Every state has strengths and weaknesses. 
I love Nature, the cold, and a slightly more chill area population wise. So I like New England

 

 Then what do you have in New England? What makes it special? And I’m well aware that every state has its own flaws. There’s no real such thing as the perfect location. There’s always gonna be someone who doesn’t like a state.

For example: I currently live in Maryland. What’s good about Maryland? We have nice beaches, the perfect combination of weather (grueling heat and freezing cold) and are close to pretty much everything. Virginia’s less than an hour away, D.C is in 30 minutes. Heck, you could go to South Carolina in a few hours. You like the north? Niagara Falls is close enough for a weekend trip. In my opinion, Maryland isn’t great because it has a bunch of stuff. It’s great because we’re in proximity to all of the interesting places on the east coast. We also have really good seafood 

What’s bad about Maryland? Well the temperature obviously aren’t for everyone. Our most populous city is a mess, and if you don’t like road trips,  there ain’t much to do outside of, Baltimore (aforementioned city that’s a mess), Annapolis and Ocean City. The people here aren’t always amazing either 

Hello

Quote from himynamesare >>

Quote from PJtheARCH3R >>

Maine doesn’t have as many people as the average state, which does make it more lonely I agree

New England isnt boring

 

really I think pretty much the entirety of the East and west coast are cool. I like the northeast, but there are flaws. I’m sure whatever state of choice you have has a ton of haters as well. Every state has strengths and weaknesses. 
I love Nature, the cold, and a slightly more chill area population wise. So I like New England

 

 Then what do you have in New England? What makes it special? And I’m well aware that every state has its own flaws. There’s no real such thing as the perfect location. There’s always gonna be someone who doesn’t like a state.

For example: I currently live in Maryland. What’s good about Maryland? We have nice beaches, the perfect combination of weather (grueling heat and freezing cold) and are close to pretty much everything. Virginia’s less than an hour away, D.C is in 30 minutes. Heck, you could go to South Carolina in a few hours. You like the north? Niagara Falls is close enough for a weekend trip. In my opinion, Maryland isn’t great because it has a bunch of stuff. It’s great because we’re in proximity to all of the interesting places on the east coast. We also have really good seafood 

What’s bad about Maryland? Well the temperature obviously aren’t for everyone. Our most populous city is a mess, and if you don’t like road trips,  there ain’t much to do outside of, Baltimore (aforementioned city that’s a mess), Annapolis and Ocean City. The people here aren’t always amazing either 

 I wrote a longer post but deleted it in favor of the short one, but here we go I guess.

1. I have a lot of heritage in New England and the nearby areas. In fact, almost all my aunts and uncles and cousins on my dads side are in a state together. If I left New England I'd probably lose a lot of connection with my family. And a good amount of my moms side is also on the neighboring Long Island. This is not as much of an objective reason, but the entire debate sprouted from why I specifically would stay or move to different places anyway
2. Like I said, the nature is good (especially the fall). I know this isn't entirely unique to New England, but it is well known for its nature, especially the foliage. In comparison to many other states its wildlife is better. It is especially enjoyable for people who are camping and hiking enthusiasts and anyone who likes the ocean
3. We are close to Canada, so you could visit there if you wanted
4. More of just an association sort of thing, but Vermont syrup is really great
5. despite what you think, there are a lot of cool places to go in New England. Mystic seaport and mystic as a town in general come to mind, and Acadia, Quassy, most of the state parks are great, Rocky Neck State park, especially the beach, there are a lot of others but those are some random ones I've personally been to
6. New England is consistently progressive/left, while there is definitely problematic groups/people to found in general people and the policy's are pretty accepting of everyone in a broader sense. Again, not entirely unique, there are other states like that, but still a perk. And the lower on the east coast you go generally the more conservative states get
7. Its not crammed, but there is still a lot of people if you're looking for them. Populations are more moderate. As someone who doesn't like big cities everywhere I enjoy this. And even so, there are good large cities if that's what you so desire
8. kind of falls into Nature, but we also have a lot of good beaches
9. I don't eat seafood, but we are known for seafood. Honestly though it feels like every single state on the east coast is, so its not that impressive
10. It is cold, especially the deeper you go into New England. as previously mentioned, I love the colder months. Even though it gets cold summer is still pretty warm, especially depending on which state you go to. I prefer cooler summers, especially with each passing summer being the hottest on record
11. A LOT of the east coast is, but New England states were part of the original thirteen colonies, and there's cool history. I'm pretty sure that's a major part of Boston tourist attractions. I'm not a history nerd or anything but its enjoyable

What do I think is bad about New England?
1. Like discussed, states like Maine often have not that many people and are therefore more lonely
2. It will take a very long time to get anywhere that isn't within one or two states of New England

Again, really just up to opinion, but it's a pretty hot take to say New England is just a boring area with nothing to do

I normally don't consider a character's sexual aspects (gender identity, biological differences based on the sexes, romantic preferences, etc.), but I did it for Theo yesterday, and it felt weirdly liberating. Like, a character's preferences and how they act about them can say a lot about them.

Theo Gildedguts is obsessed with power dynamics, but he prefers the sort of tradwife role. He's gay and it's kind of widely known due to his work as a "companion" in the past, but he still tries to hide it. He deflects everything about himself, trying to remain an enigma not worth looking into in the first place, and that's why he has his silent, intimidated, mechanized "death knight" to represent him. He wants to be big and scary so people will stop persecuting him and pushing him around, and being homosexual or loving is seen as a sign of weakness to many people, so he can never have a partner, never allow himself to fall in love, never be vulnerable with others.

He's a tragic character, and this is one of those tragic aspects of him that makes so much sense for him but would never have happened if I never left my comfort zone.

Admittedly, this will never come up in the campaign he's in, but it was excellent character building.

Quote from Baalzeboop >>

I normally don't consider a character's sexual aspects (gender identity, biological differences based on the sexes, romantic preferences, etc.), but I did it for Theo yesterday, and it felt weirdly liberating. Like, a character's preferences and how they act about them can say a lot about them.

Theo Gildedguts is obsessed with power dynamics, but he prefers the sort of tradwife role. He's gay and it's kind of widely known due to his work as a "companion" in the past, but he still tries to hide it. He deflects everything about himself, trying to remain an enigma not worth looking into in the first place, and that's why he has his silent, intimidated, mechanized "death knight" to represent him. He wants to be big and scary so people will stop persecuting him and pushing him around, and being homosexual or loving is seen as a sign of weakness to many people, so he can never have a partner, never allow himself to fall in love, never be vulnerable with others.

He's a tragic character, and this is one of those tragic aspects of him that makes so much sense for him but would never have happened if I never left my comfort zone.

Admittedly, this will never come up in the campaign he's in, but it was excellent character building.

 Ayyyy that‘s really cool Baal!

‘Ello!

Hi Sel

Hi moon

how are you

Kansas is scientifically flatter than a pancake I can almost die in peace now

Quote from Baalzeboop >>

I normally don't consider a character's sexual aspects (gender identity, biological differences based on the sexes, romantic preferences, etc.), but I did it for Theo yesterday, and it felt weirdly liberating. Like, a character's preferences and how they act about them can say a lot about them.

Theo Gildedguts is obsessed with power dynamics, but he prefers the sort of tradwife role. He's gay and it's kind of widely known due to his work as a "companion" in the past, but he still tries to hide it. He deflects everything about himself, trying to remain an enigma not worth looking into in the first place, and that's why he has his silent, intimidated, mechanized "death knight" to represent him. He wants to be big and scary so people will stop persecuting him and pushing him around, and being homosexual or loving is seen as a sign of weakness to many people, so he can never have a partner, never allow himself to fall in love, never be vulnerable with others.

He's a tragic character, and this is one of those tragic aspects of him that makes so much sense for him but would never have happened if I never left my comfort zone.

Admittedly, this will never come up in the campaign he's in, but it was excellent character building.

 I find it interesting how such small, seemingly insignificant things about a character can reveal so much about them as a person 

Anyone wanna RP?

I bullied a green lizard in Rain World today :D

WHAT?