Slopnik strides over. "Ah, activism? How prudent of you! Most these days simply wield violence as a means to an end, only to find that it was their end they were pursuing the whole time." He holds out a hand for a leaflet. "Now, what would your cause be?"
In a branching and likely reconnecting timeling, Slopnik approaches the rodentfolk. "Well, hello there! Are you one of that kid's relatives?"
'Alliance between the civilised beastfolk and the surface-dwellers'
'That kid? Ah, Skulk, yeah, I've heard he's been hanging out here'
He nods. "Admirable goal. I've tried to do the same, but my methods usually involve inventions as opposed to direct intervention. After all, we shape our tools as our tools shape us, right?"
He tilts his head. "Yeah, I gave him a meal yesterday. He gave me a vague location to deliver the food to, so apologies if we got the wrong place."
'I suppose so. It just seems ridiculous that people like you and I are lumped in with the maggots and cockroaches, when we're clearly worth just as much as the humans. If we somehow got their ear, got ourselves some influence in their society, think about what we could do.'
'We got it, don't worry. Got some scouts to find the food, you weren't far away from our den. What have you been doing with this food, if you don't mind me askin'? People don't just go handing out free samples. Not that I'm saying it's poisoned or something, Skulk knows to sniff every morsel given by strangers, he can tell poison since those sickos tried to kill us'
He nods. "Admirable goal. I've tried to do the same, but my methods usually involve inventions as opposed to direct intervention. After all, we shape our tools as our tools shape us, right?"
He tilts his head. "Yeah, I gave him a meal yesterday. He gave me a vague location to deliver the food to, so apologies if we got the wrong place."
'I suppose so. It just seems ridiculous that people like you and I are lumped in with the maggots and cockroaches, when we're clearly worth just as much as the humans. If we somehow got their ear, got ourselves some influence in their society, think about what we could do.'
'We got it, don't worry. Got some scouts to find the food, you weren't far away from our den. What have you been doing with this food, if you don't mind me askin'? People don't just go handing out free samples. Not that I'm saying it's poisoned or something, Skulk knows to sniff every morsel given by strangers, he can tell poison since those sickos tried to kill us'
The doctor shrugs. "Technically, I am biologically human, but due to my gigantism and odd behavior I'm not normally treated like one. I've been trying to influence society for 30 years, but as I've learned, it's a rigged game. It takes some cheating, which is why I've decided to become a villain."
He chuckles. "With what that food is made of, I'm surprised you didn't get any false positives. Don't get me wrong, it's still food, and I have rigorous quality control to protect my customers, but a lot of people wouldn't qualify this as 'legal.' Believe it or not, it's technically vegan since there are no real animal products. Not even in the burgers. It tastes just like real meat though, doesn't it?"
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
The small, shadowy bug is curled up in a corner, waiting for someone to tell it to get out.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
He nods. "Admirable goal. I've tried to do the same, but my methods usually involve inventions as opposed to direct intervention. After all, we shape our tools as our tools shape us, right?"
He tilts his head. "Yeah, I gave him a meal yesterday. He gave me a vague location to deliver the food to, so apologies if we got the wrong place."
'I suppose so. It just seems ridiculous that people like you and I are lumped in with the maggots and cockroaches, when we're clearly worth just as much as the humans. If we somehow got their ear, got ourselves some influence in their society, think about what we could do.'
'We got it, don't worry. Got some scouts to find the food, you weren't far away from our den. What have you been doing with this food, if you don't mind me askin'? People don't just go handing out free samples. Not that I'm saying it's poisoned or something, Skulk knows to sniff every morsel given by strangers, he can tell poison since those sickos tried to kill us'
The doctor shrugs. "Technically, I am biologically human, but due to my gigantism and odd behavior I'm not normally treated like one. I've been trying to influence society for 30 years, but as I've learned, it's a rigged game. It takes some cheating, which is why I've decided to become a villain."
He chuckles. "With what that food is made of, I'm surprised you didn't get any false positives. Don't get me wrong, it's still food, and I have rigorous quality control to protect my customers, but a lot of people wouldn't qualify this as 'legal.' Believe it or not, it's technically vegan since there are no real animal products. Not even in the burgers. It tastes just like real meat though, doesn't it?"
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
He nods. "Admirable goal. I've tried to do the same, but my methods usually involve inventions as opposed to direct intervention. After all, we shape our tools as our tools shape us, right?"
He tilts his head. "Yeah, I gave him a meal yesterday. He gave me a vague location to deliver the food to, so apologies if we got the wrong place."
'I suppose so. It just seems ridiculous that people like you and I are lumped in with the maggots and cockroaches, when we're clearly worth just as much as the humans. If we somehow got their ear, got ourselves some influence in their society, think about what we could do.'
'We got it, don't worry. Got some scouts to find the food, you weren't far away from our den. What have you been doing with this food, if you don't mind me askin'? People don't just go handing out free samples. Not that I'm saying it's poisoned or something, Skulk knows to sniff every morsel given by strangers, he can tell poison since those sickos tried to kill us'
The doctor shrugs. "Technically, I am biologically human, but due to my gigantism and odd behavior I'm not normally treated like one. I've been trying to influence society for 30 years, but as I've learned, it's a rigged game. It takes some cheating, which is why I've decided to become a villain."
He chuckles. "With what that food is made of, I'm surprised you didn't get any false positives. Don't get me wrong, it's still food, and I have rigorous quality control to protect my customers, but a lot of people wouldn't qualify this as 'legal.' Believe it or not, it's technically vegan since there are no real animal products. Not even in the burgers. It tastes just like real meat though, doesn't it?"
'A villain? In what way? A respectable one, I hope'
The doctor shrugs. "Technically, I am biologically human, but due to my gigantism and odd behavior I'm not normally treated like one. I've been trying to influence society for 30 years, but as I've learned, it's a rigged game. It takes some cheating, which is why I've decided to become a villain."
He chuckles. "With what that food is made of, I'm surprised you didn't get any false positives. Don't get me wrong, it's still food, and I have rigorous quality control to protect my customers, but a lot of people wouldn't qualify this as 'legal.' Believe it or not, it's technically vegan since there are no real animal products. Not even in the burgers. It tastes just like real meat though, doesn't it?"
'A villain? In what way? A respectable one, I hope'
'Indeed it does. How much does it cost?'
"Oh, a very respectable one. I stir up conflict now and then, challenging ideals and causing a couple hundred dollars of public property damage each time I pull out an evil plan." He grins proudly and straightens his tie. "A villain isn't there to rack up a body count or cause suffering, but to challenge the status quo in a way that needs to be addressed directly. I like big, bulletproof mechs and armies of mindless constructs for my plans. It's hard to get attention without hurting people, so I mostly break windows on government buildings and disrupt the flow of traffic. And, for extra evil power, I never pay for traffic tickets. Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
"Well, you can get a meal for 25 cents, complete with a burger, small drink, and your choice of a small side. My profit margins are razor thin, but I sell so much it hardly matters. It's ironic, since people hate me so much."
(25 cents is about 0.0134 British Pounds, I don't know your currency very well. Sorry.)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
The doctor shrugs. "Technically, I am biologically human, but due to my gigantism and odd behavior I'm not normally treated like one. I've been trying to influence society for 30 years, but as I've learned, it's a rigged game. It takes some cheating, which is why I've decided to become a villain."
He chuckles. "With what that food is made of, I'm surprised you didn't get any false positives. Don't get me wrong, it's still food, and I have rigorous quality control to protect my customers, but a lot of people wouldn't qualify this as 'legal.' Believe it or not, it's technically vegan since there are no real animal products. Not even in the burgers. It tastes just like real meat though, doesn't it?"
'A villain? In what way? A respectable one, I hope'
'Indeed it does. How much does it cost?'
"Oh, a very respectable one. I stir up conflict now and then, challenging ideals and causing a couple hundred dollars of public property damage each time I pull out an evil plan." He grins proudly and straightens his tie. "A villain isn't there to rack up a body count or cause suffering, but to challenge the status quo in a way that needs to be addressed directly. I like big, bulletproof mechs and armies of mindless constructs for my plans. It's hard to get attention without hurting people, so I mostly break windows on government buildings and disrupt the flow of traffic. And, for extra evil power, I never pay for traffic tickets. Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
"Well, you can get a meal for 25 cents, complete with a burger, small drink, and your choice of a small side. My profit margins are razor thin, but I sell so much it hardly matters. It's ironic, since people hate me so much."
(25 cents is about 0.0134 British Pounds, I don't know your currency very well. Sorry.)
'Challenge the status quo? We need more people like that, that's for sure. I can agree with you on a lot, to be honest. Serial killers with no motive, random chaos-peddlers, boring. But using your power to tear open the hypocrisies and lies of the world, and hopefully create a cleaner world free of them, I don't even know if I'd call you a villain. More my kind of hero. And I can tell you, the current powers that be need a shock to their system. They can't keep ignoring us, treating us as lesser. For the devil's sake, I'm a cat. What are cats? Intelligent, playful, likeable, well-groomed. And we're predators, the top of the food chain, not built to be subjugated. We could do so much better than what we're given.'
'Sounds pretty good deal. Why do they hate you? You seem pretty reasonable, and if you've tolerated my son then you can't be all bad.'
"Oh, a very respectable one. I stir up conflict now and then, challenging ideals and causing a couple hundred dollars of public property damage each time I pull out an evil plan." He grins proudly and straightens his tie. "A villain isn't there to rack up a body count or cause suffering, but to challenge the status quo in a way that needs to be addressed directly. I like big, bulletproof mechs and armies of mindless constructs for my plans. It's hard to get attention without hurting people, so I mostly break windows on government buildings and disrupt the flow of traffic. And, for extra evil power, I never pay for traffic tickets. Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
"Well, you can get a meal for 25 cents, complete with a burger, small drink, and your choice of a small side. My profit margins are razor thin, but I sell so much it hardly matters. It's ironic, since people hate me so much."
(25 cents is about 0.0134 British Pounds, I don't know your currency very well. Sorry.)
'Challenge the status quo? We need more people like that, that's for sure. I can agree with you on a lot, to be honest. Serial killers with no motive, random chaos-peddlers, boring. But using your power to tear open the hypocrisies and lies of the world, and hopefully create a cleaner world free of them, I don't even know if I'd call you a villain. More my kind of hero. And I can tell you, the current powers that be need a shock to their system. They can't keep ignoring us, treating us as lesser. For the devil's sake, I'm a cat. What are cats? Intelligent, playful, likeable, well-groomed. And we're predators, the top of the food chain, not built to be subjugated. We could do so much better than what we're given.'
'Sounds pretty good deal. Why do they hate you? You seem pretty reasonable, and if you've tolerated my son then you can't be all bad.'
"Which is another big part of my operation, actually. My inventions make the most of a bad situation without sacrificing morality. Those who have to compromise their... humanity, for want of a better word, are weak or stupid. I don't compromise, because I am a genius and I can do anything, even cause major government reform."
"Humans typically trust the government. I rail against it like my life depends on it. They say I'm genetically flawed and mentally ill, which, while both true, are not accepted features in human society. Brings me too close to the mutants in their eyes. I mean, I'm eight feet tall, so it's not like I can hide it. What makes it even worse is that no one has found a way to keep me under wraps or controlled for long enough to come up with effective countermeasures. People fear what they can't control."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
"Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
*we have confirmation that Dr. Slopnik is a better citizen than Yoshi*
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
"Oh, a very respectable one. I stir up conflict now and then, challenging ideals and causing a couple hundred dollars of public property damage each time I pull out an evil plan." He grins proudly and straightens his tie. "A villain isn't there to rack up a body count or cause suffering, but to challenge the status quo in a way that needs to be addressed directly. I like big, bulletproof mechs and armies of mindless constructs for my plans. It's hard to get attention without hurting people, so I mostly break windows on government buildings and disrupt the flow of traffic. And, for extra evil power, I never pay for traffic tickets. Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
"Well, you can get a meal for 25 cents, complete with a burger, small drink, and your choice of a small side. My profit margins are razor thin, but I sell so much it hardly matters. It's ironic, since people hate me so much."
(25 cents is about 0.0134 British Pounds, I don't know your currency very well. Sorry.)
'Challenge the status quo? We need more people like that, that's for sure. I can agree with you on a lot, to be honest. Serial killers with no motive, random chaos-peddlers, boring. But using your power to tear open the hypocrisies and lies of the world, and hopefully create a cleaner world free of them, I don't even know if I'd call you a villain. More my kind of hero. And I can tell you, the current powers that be need a shock to their system. They can't keep ignoring us, treating us as lesser. For the devil's sake, I'm a cat. What are cats? Intelligent, playful, likeable, well-groomed. And we're predators, the top of the food chain, not built to be subjugated. We could do so much better than what we're given.'
'Sounds pretty good deal. Why do they hate you? You seem pretty reasonable, and if you've tolerated my son then you can't be all bad.'
"Which is another big part of my operation, actually. My inventions make the most of a bad situation without sacrificing morality. Those who have to compromise their... humanity, for want of a better word, are weak or stupid. I don't compromise, because I am a genius and I can do anything, even cause major government reform."
"Humans typically trust the government. I rail against it like my life depends on it. They say I'm genetically flawed and mentally ill, which, while both true, are not accepted features in human society. Brings me too close to the mutants in their eyes. I mean, I'm eight feet tall, so it's not like I can hide it. What makes it even worse is that no one has found a way to keep me under wraps or controlled for long enough to come up with effective countermeasures. People fear what they can't control."
'That's a good attitude. Perhaps I may be of help to you? I have been trying to rally the people to get us better integrated with human society. Draw a line with us in the circle with the humans, and the real beasts outside, you understand. I have access to humans so I could potentially divert some your way, I run a small tour company, Redclaw Tours, that shows humans how real beastfolk live'
'Aye, that they do. You'd be welcome here, we don't exactly like them up there either. Hear them talking about how something ought to be done about us, like we're rats and not people. Good luck to them though, they ain't got a chance against us.'
He can see a small, shadowy bug trying to hide in the corner.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
"Which is another big part of my operation, actually. My inventions make the most of a bad situation without sacrificing morality. Those who have to compromise their... humanity, for want of a better word, are weak or stupid. I don't compromise, because I am a genius and I can do anything, even cause major government reform."
"Humans typically trust the government. I rail against it like my life depends on it. They say I'm genetically flawed and mentally ill, which, while both true, are not accepted features in human society. Brings me too close to the mutants in their eyes. I mean, I'm eight feet tall, so it's not like I can hide it. What makes it even worse is that no one has found a way to keep me under wraps or controlled for long enough to come up with effective countermeasures. People fear what they can't control."
'That's a good attitude. Perhaps I may be of help to you? I have been trying to rally the people to get us better integrated with human society. Draw a line with us in the circle with the humans, and the real beasts outside, you understand. I have access to humans so I could potentially divert some your way, I run a small tour company, Redclaw Tours, that shows humans how real beastfolk live'
'Aye, that they do. You'd be welcome here, we don't exactly like them up there either. Hear them talking about how something ought to be done about us, like we're rats and not people. Good luck to them though, they ain't got a chance against us.'
He raises an eyebrow. "'Real beasts?' What do you mean by that?"
He snorts. "Bah! Bunch of fools, really. If you can't control it, either become one with it or leave it alone. Destroying it is stupid. They're dealing with forces beyond them, and they know it. Natural power that was there before them and will survive long after."
"Oh, a very respectable one. I stir up conflict now and then, challenging ideals and causing a couple hundred dollars of public property damage each time I pull out an evil plan." He grins proudly and straightens his tie. "A villain isn't there to rack up a body count or cause suffering, but to challenge the status quo in a way that needs to be addressed directly. I like big, bulletproof mechs and armies of mindless constructs for my plans. It's hard to get attention without hurting people, so I mostly break windows on government buildings and disrupt the flow of traffic. And, for extra evil power, I never pay for traffic tickets. Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
"Well, you can get a meal for 25 cents, complete with a burger, small drink, and your choice of a small side. My profit margins are razor thin, but I sell so much it hardly matters. It's ironic, since people hate me so much."
(25 cents is about 0.0134 British Pounds, I don't know your currency very well. Sorry.)
'Challenge the status quo? We need more people like that, that's for sure. I can agree with you on a lot, to be honest. Serial killers with no motive, random chaos-peddlers, boring. But using your power to tear open the hypocrisies and lies of the world, and hopefully create a cleaner world free of them, I don't even know if I'd call you a villain. More my kind of hero. And I can tell you, the current powers that be need a shock to their system. They can't keep ignoring us, treating us as lesser. For the devil's sake, I'm a cat. What are cats? Intelligent, playful, likeable, well-groomed. And we're predators, the top of the food chain, not built to be subjugated. We could do so much better than what we're given.'
'Sounds pretty good deal. Why do they hate you? You seem pretty reasonable, and if you've tolerated my son then you can't be all bad.'
"Which is another big part of my operation, actually. My inventions make the most of a bad situation without sacrificing morality. Those who have to compromise their... humanity, for want of a better word, are weak or stupid. I don't compromise, because I am a genius and I can do anything, even cause major government reform."
"Humans typically trust the government. I rail against it like my life depends on it. They say I'm genetically flawed and mentally ill, which, while both true, are not accepted features in human society. Brings me too close to the mutants in their eyes. I mean, I'm eight feet tall, so it's not like I can hide it. What makes it even worse is that no one has found a way to keep me under wraps or controlled for long enough to come up with effective countermeasures. People fear what they can't control."
'That's a good attitude. Perhaps I may be of help to you? I have been trying to rally the people to get us better integrated with human society. Draw a line with us in the circle with the humans, and the real beasts outside, you understand. I have access to humans so I could potentially divert some your way, I run a small tour company, Redclaw Tours, that shows humans how real beastfolk live'
'Aye, that they do. You'd be welcome here, we don't exactly like them up there either. Hear them talking about how something ought to be done about us, like we're rats and not people. Good luck to them though, they ain't got a chance against us.'
He raises an eyebrow. "'Real beasts?' What do you mean by that?"
He snorts. "Bah! Bunch of fools, really. If you can't control it, either become one with it or leave it alone. Destroying it is stupid. They're dealing with forces beyond them, and they know it. Natural power that was there before them and will survive long after."
'You know, those who can't be civilised. It's a sad fact, but not every type of beastfolk is suited to it. Take the dung beetles. You could give them a house and a vote, they'd still run off to live in dumps and eat dung. Or the hyenas. You surely don't think that they're going to play nice as soon as they're offered jobs? Nature is a powerful thing, we all have our different places within the great food chain, after all. We can't expect to override mother nature with wishful thinking.'
'I'd like to think so. And now we have a stable food source, that's one step closer to security for us. The name's Grimecoat, by the way'
He raises an eyebrow. "'Real beasts?' What do you mean by that?"
He snorts. "Bah! Bunch of fools, really. If you can't control it, either become one with it or leave it alone. Destroying it is stupid. They're dealing with forces beyond them, and they know it. Natural power that was there before them and will survive long after."
'You know, those who can't be civilised. It's a sad fact, but not every type of beastfolk is suited to it. Take the dung beetles. You could give them a house and a vote, they'd still run off to live in dumps and eat dung. Or the hyenas. You surely don't think that they're going to play nice as soon as they're offered jobs? Nature is a powerful thing, we all have our different places within the great food chain, after all. We can't expect to override mother nature with wishful thinking.'
'I'd like to think so. And now we have a stable food source, that's one step closer to security for us. The name's Grimecoat, by the way'
He grabs Tom by the throat and tosses him across the room with surprising strength. "Would you like to rephrase, Doublespeak? Or perhaps you weren't paying attention." He starts to walk over, his footsteps thundering as he pulls up one sleeve to reveal a control console. Various patrons stand back.
He chuckles. "Nice to meet you, Grimecoat! I'm glad that you all like the food. You should supplement it with other meals, but if you just need calories then Slophaven is the right place! I'm building a new location soon! Very close to this tavern, actually! Muahahaha!"
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
He raises an eyebrow. "'Real beasts?' What do you mean by that?"
He snorts. "Bah! Bunch of fools, really. If you can't control it, either become one with it or leave it alone. Destroying it is stupid. They're dealing with forces beyond them, and they know it. Natural power that was there before them and will survive long after."
'You know, those who can't be civilised. It's a sad fact, but not every type of beastfolk is suited to it. Take the dung beetles. You could give them a house and a vote, they'd still run off to live in dumps and eat dung. Or the hyenas. You surely don't think that they're going to play nice as soon as they're offered jobs? Nature is a powerful thing, we all have our different places within the great food chain, after all. We can't expect to override mother nature with wishful thinking.'
'I'd like to think so. And now we have a stable food source, that's one step closer to security for us. The name's Grimecoat, by the way'
He grabs Tom by the throat and tosses him across the room with surprising strength. "Would you like to rephrase, Doublespeak? Or perhaps you weren't paying attention." He starts to walk over, his footsteps thundering as he pulls up one sleeve to reveal a control console. Various patrons stand back.
He chuckles. "Nice to meet you, Grimecoat! I'm glad that you all like the food. You should supplement it with other meals, but if you just need calories then Slophaven is the right place! I'm building a new location soon! Very close to this tavern, actually! Muahahaha!"
'Rephrase? Do you think that we should all be hiding in the shadows, then? Do you disagree that intelligent beastfolk deserve the same rights as humans?' Tom retorts back, as much for the 'benefit' of the viewing patrons as anyone else.
'Muahahaha? Skulk was right, you do sound like a cartoon villain. But let's hope you're not as bad as you like to present yourself.'
He grabs Tom by the throat and tosses him across the room with surprising strength. "Would you like to rephrase, Doublespeak? Or perhaps you weren't paying attention." He starts to walk over, his footsteps thundering as he pulls up one sleeve to reveal a control console. Various patrons stand back.
He chuckles. "Nice to meet you, Grimecoat! I'm glad that you all like the food. You should supplement it with other meals, but if you just need calories then Slophaven is the right place! I'm building a new location soon! Very close to this tavern, actually! Muahahaha!"
'Rephrase? Do you think that we should all be hiding in the shadows, then? Do you disagree that intelligent beastfolk deserve the same rights as humans?' Tom retorts back, as much for the 'benefit' of the viewing patrons as anyone else.
'Muahahaha? Skulk was right, you do sound like a cartoon villain. But let's hope you're not as bad as you like to present yourself.'
"I don't think anyone should be forced to hide in the shadows, bugs and mutants included." His overlarge mouth is contorted into a grimace, and his undersized eyes twisted into a disdainful glare. "You talk a big game, but you lack the moral fiber needed to be a true supervillain. 'The great food chain?' Seriously? Do you hear yourself? Humans have always been at the top of the food chain, and anyone here knows how badly that's gone! You don't want to change the order... you just want to change your position in it."
"I can be as bad as I need to be, but as a genius, that badness level is very low. Y'all better be thankful for that, too. If I weren't as smart as I am, I would probably have done something dangerous by now under the name of 'necessity.'" He says that last word with a mocking tone.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
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'I suppose so. It just seems ridiculous that people like you and I are lumped in with the maggots and cockroaches, when we're clearly worth just as much as the humans. If we somehow got their ear, got ourselves some influence in their society, think about what we could do.'
'We got it, don't worry. Got some scouts to find the food, you weren't far away from our den. What have you been doing with this food, if you don't mind me askin'? People don't just go handing out free samples. Not that I'm saying it's poisoned or something, Skulk knows to sniff every morsel given by strangers, he can tell poison since those sickos tried to kill us'
🍅 PM me the word 'tomato' 🍅 Extended Signature Musk Sucks, Quit X!
The doctor shrugs. "Technically, I am biologically human, but due to my gigantism and odd behavior I'm not normally treated like one. I've been trying to influence society for 30 years, but as I've learned, it's a rigged game. It takes some cheating, which is why I've decided to become a villain."
He chuckles. "With what that food is made of, I'm surprised you didn't get any false positives. Don't get me wrong, it's still food, and I have rigorous quality control to protect my customers, but a lot of people wouldn't qualify this as 'legal.' Believe it or not, it's technically vegan since there are no real animal products. Not even in the burgers. It tastes just like real meat though, doesn't it?"
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
#BRINGBACKNATIONALDEX
where"s SilverRaccoon3...
Claimed by SilverRaccoon3
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*Not on the site for the past 3 days*
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
#BRINGBACKNATIONALDEX
Tom is drinking a purple drink in the bar
Skulk is skittering about trying to sell necklaces made from pull tabs
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Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
'A villain? In what way? A respectable one, I hope'
'Indeed it does. How much does it cost?'
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"Oh, a very respectable one. I stir up conflict now and then, challenging ideals and causing a couple hundred dollars of public property damage each time I pull out an evil plan." He grins proudly and straightens his tie. "A villain isn't there to rack up a body count or cause suffering, but to challenge the status quo in a way that needs to be addressed directly. I like big, bulletproof mechs and armies of mindless constructs for my plans. It's hard to get attention without hurting people, so I mostly break windows on government buildings and disrupt the flow of traffic. And, for extra evil power, I never pay for traffic tickets. Taxes are different, though. I pay those. I'm not afraid of the IRS, I just think it's good to support the occasional good thing the government funds."
"Well, you can get a meal for 25 cents, complete with a burger, small drink, and your choice of a small side. My profit margins are razor thin, but I sell so much it hardly matters. It's ironic, since people hate me so much."
(25 cents is about 0.0134 British Pounds, I don't know your currency very well. Sorry.)
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
'Challenge the status quo? We need more people like that, that's for sure. I can agree with you on a lot, to be honest. Serial killers with no motive, random chaos-peddlers, boring. But using your power to tear open the hypocrisies and lies of the world, and hopefully create a cleaner world free of them, I don't even know if I'd call you a villain. More my kind of hero. And I can tell you, the current powers that be need a shock to their system. They can't keep ignoring us, treating us as lesser. For the devil's sake, I'm a cat. What are cats? Intelligent, playful, likeable, well-groomed. And we're predators, the top of the food chain, not built to be subjugated. We could do so much better than what we're given.'
'Sounds pretty good deal. Why do they hate you? You seem pretty reasonable, and if you've tolerated my son then you can't be all bad.'
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"Which is another big part of my operation, actually. My inventions make the most of a bad situation without sacrificing morality. Those who have to compromise their... humanity, for want of a better word, are weak or stupid. I don't compromise, because I am a genius and I can do anything, even cause major government reform."
"Humans typically trust the government. I rail against it like my life depends on it. They say I'm genetically flawed and mentally ill, which, while both true, are not accepted features in human society. Brings me too close to the mutants in their eyes. I mean, I'm eight feet tall, so it's not like I can hide it. What makes it even worse is that no one has found a way to keep me under wraps or controlled for long enough to come up with effective countermeasures. People fear what they can't control."
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
*we have confirmation that Dr. Slopnik is a better citizen than Yoshi*
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
#BRINGBACKNATIONALDEX
'That's a good attitude. Perhaps I may be of help to you? I have been trying to rally the people to get us better integrated with human society. Draw a line with us in the circle with the humans, and the real beasts outside, you understand. I have access to humans so I could potentially divert some your way, I run a small tour company, Redclaw Tours, that shows humans how real beastfolk live'
'Aye, that they do. You'd be welcome here, we don't exactly like them up there either. Hear them talking about how something ought to be done about us, like we're rats and not people. Good luck to them though, they ain't got a chance against us.'
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He can see a small, shadowy bug trying to hide in the corner.
Pokemon Master, Hero of Hyrule, Jedi Knight, Minecrafter, Celestial Being Beyond Comprehension, Bounty Hunter, Salmon Runner, Nailmaster, Yarn Yoshi Enjoyer, Animal Lover, Math Rock Roller, Nerd King in all Aspects.
(And, of course, Dragon Tamer. It is in the name, after all)
#BRINGBACKNATIONALDEX
'Ah, hello there.' Tom's feline pupils narrow in suspicion
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He raises an eyebrow. "'Real beasts?' What do you mean by that?"
He snorts. "Bah! Bunch of fools, really. If you can't control it, either become one with it or leave it alone. Destroying it is stupid. They're dealing with forces beyond them, and they know it. Natural power that was there before them and will survive long after."
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
'You know, those who can't be civilised. It's a sad fact, but not every type of beastfolk is suited to it. Take the dung beetles. You could give them a house and a vote, they'd still run off to live in dumps and eat dung. Or the hyenas. You surely don't think that they're going to play nice as soon as they're offered jobs? Nature is a powerful thing, we all have our different places within the great food chain, after all. We can't expect to override mother nature with wishful thinking.'
'I'd like to think so. And now we have a stable food source, that's one step closer to security for us. The name's Grimecoat, by the way'
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He grabs Tom by the throat and tosses him across the room with surprising strength. "Would you like to rephrase, Doublespeak? Or perhaps you weren't paying attention." He starts to walk over, his footsteps thundering as he pulls up one sleeve to reveal a control console. Various patrons stand back.
He chuckles. "Nice to meet you, Grimecoat! I'm glad that you all like the food. You should supplement it with other meals, but if you just need calories then Slophaven is the right place! I'm building a new location soon! Very close to this tavern, actually! Muahahaha!"
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.
'Rephrase? Do you think that we should all be hiding in the shadows, then? Do you disagree that intelligent beastfolk deserve the same rights as humans?' Tom retorts back, as much for the 'benefit' of the viewing patrons as anyone else.
'Muahahaha? Skulk was right, you do sound like a cartoon villain. But let's hope you're not as bad as you like to present yourself.'
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"I don't think anyone should be forced to hide in the shadows, bugs and mutants included." His overlarge mouth is contorted into a grimace, and his undersized eyes twisted into a disdainful glare. "You talk a big game, but you lack the moral fiber needed to be a true supervillain. 'The great food chain?' Seriously? Do you hear yourself? Humans have always been at the top of the food chain, and anyone here knows how badly that's gone! You don't want to change the order... you just want to change your position in it."
"I can be as bad as I need to be, but as a genius, that badness level is very low. Y'all better be thankful for that, too. If I weren't as smart as I am, I would probably have done something dangerous by now under the name of 'necessity.'" He says that last word with a mocking tone.
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
May each word that I speak be backed by each of my teeth.