Life is very busy unfortunately, gone from most Pbp's indefinitely. If you'd like to contact me, I am on Discord at GreatAxeblade#7595, always happy to chat :)
So in my last 3 sessions (a solo adventure I'm running) I invented a character who is called Jeeves (original, I know), and he's a robotic butler who transports himself around the mansion in pipes. He only ever emerges from the pipes suddenly and with a loud "Thwop!" sound.
The PC (Molly) had gone to the artificers mansion to have an item identified. When she arrived, Jeeves appeared and she swung a punch at him as he popped up right next to her. She then apologised and he said "don't worry miss, it happens all the time".
She later realised that she had left the item on her horse, so the artificer said "Don't worry, I'll send Jeeves to get it". Jeeves disappeared, and in the distance they heard a "Thwop", a horse spooking, and a clang. Jeeves then reappeared holding the artefact with a hoof-shaped dent in his head, saying "a spirited animal you have there, miss".
Jeeves later reappeared with, unusually, a steak strapped to his face over the dent, and was sent to give a message to the innkeeper in the local village. Jeeves came back with the steak cut in half and a sword cut across his face, with a letter from the innkeeper apologising for damaging him, he hadn't expected him to pop up from his barrel of apples!
Note to self: Find a way to prevent Jeeves from jumpscaring those he pops up next to, for his health.
So in my last 3 sessions (a solo adventure I'm running) I invented a character who is called Jeeves (original, I know), and he's a robotic butler who transports himself around the mansion in pipes. He only ever emerges from the pipes suddenly and with a loud "Thwop!" sound.
The PC (Molly) had gone to the artificers mansion to have an item identified. When she arrived, Jeeves appeared and she swung a punch at him as he popped up right next to her. She then apologised and he said "don't worry miss, it happens all the time".
She later realised that she had left the item on her horse, so the artificer said "Don't worry, I'll send Jeeves to get it". Jeeves disappeared, and in the distance they heard a "Thwop", a horse spooking, and a clang. Jeeves then reappeared holding the artefact with a hoof-shaped dent in his head, saying "a spirited animal you have there, miss".
Jeeves later reappeared with, unusually, a steak strapped to his face over the dent, and was sent to give a message to the innkeeper in the local village. Jeeves came back with the steak cut in half and a sword cut across his face, with a letter from the innkeeper apologising for damaging him, he hadn't expected him to pop up from his barrel of apples!
Note to self: Find a way to prevent Jeeves from jumpscaring those he pops up next to, for his health.
Agreed. Petition to keep Jeeves safe, he is too helpful to keep being dented.
Seventh level party of Ferrin (half elf wizard), Sister Serena (aasimar cleric), Venn (tiefling sorcerer), Xanlar (half elf paladin), and Nu (axolotl shifter druid), plus NPCs Phillip (human ranger) and "the kobold" (who's name we still haven't learned). The party is leading a group of NPCs they rescued from a sacrifice ritual, several of whom are wounded, maimed, or otherwise not in fighting shape. Also there's Al, Xanlar and Venn's old sergeant who has since revealed himself to be a Fravian [enemy nation] expatriate who ran away and before joining the army of Solstice [Venn, Xanlar, and Serena's nation] and isn't a halfling as he appears, but some sort of fey-ish race and also a cleric of Amaunator.
DM notes that Xanlar's sentient, blood drinking dagger, is vibrating.
Xanlar: "He's just nervous. I pet him."
====
Returning to the entrance of the underground cave we were at a few sessions ago to seek shelter and recover from the big fight, along with several wounded NPCs.
Nu: "I fall down the hole. Weeee!"
====
After "catching" several NPCs who also went down the slide-like passage before falling twenty feet to the cave floor.
Nu: "I'm like a dented plushie."
====
Serena: "Since I'm the last one and I can hear all of the noise from everybody falling and cursing below me, can I get an athletics check to roll with it for less damage?"
DM: "Roll acrobatics."
Serena: "That's dex..." *rolls a 4, modified to a 3 from Serena's dex score of 9*
DM: "You land right on your ass and take...four points of damage."
====
Serena and the only female NPC go over to an obscured corner to bathe in the underground lake away from the otherwise male PC/NPCs. And Nu. Al turns and looks at Nu.
Al: "What about this...uh, person? Um, are you a boy or a girl?"
Nu: "Huh?"
Al: "Uh, nevermind."
====
Speaking to Mikhail, a twelve year old child soldier recruit that was rescued.
Serena: "We need to get these people away from the front and to someplace safe. All the way back to Solstice if possible. Don't take this the wrong way but you're way too young to be out here."
Mikhail: "Oh, I agree miss! I think I'm way too young to be out here, too!"
Al: "You're all way too young to be out here."
Serena "I am an adult and I can make my own decisions." *OOC notes that Serena is seventeen*
Al: "I am a hundred and fifty years old. You're all kids to me."
Serena: "Who was rescuing who just yesterday?"
Al: "Good point. You can make your own decisions."
====
Speaking of the evil guy that was leading the ritual we interrupted.
Serena: "He called you 'brother,' are you actually related or was that just because you're similar or from the same place or something."
Al: "We grew up together but we're not related. He...went down a different path. He became dark, and strong. But you did something nobody has for a long time. You hurt him."
Serena: "Well, I was trying to hurt him a lot more but he got away."
====
Trying to figure out how to get everybody up through the twenty foot high hole in the ceiling.
Kobold: "Can't the pink thing just turn into a giant scarab or something and climb up with the rope?"
Nu: "What's a scarab? I've never seen one of those."
*Kobold picks up a scarab from the cave floor and holds it up in front of Nu*
Kobold: "It's this."
Nu*ooc*: "I eat it."
After a rather long and somewhat amusing ordeal we manage to get everybody out. We leave most of the NPCs, except for Al, at the village of the bullywugs we've befriended and set out for the former hideout of a disgraced Solstice officer on the run. Ferrin is hoping to get some information from him. DM calls for survival rolls to navigate the jungle. Serena and Nu do not roll well.
Serena "I am definitely somewhere."
Nu: "I think we're back in the cave."
The hideout is built as a tavern in the middle of the jungle. While searching it, Venn and Xanlar get into the liquor supplies which include some very nice booze. Venn tries explaining liquor to Nu.
Venn:" It's, uh, water. But spicy. Like it has fire in it."
Nu: "Fire? In water? That's against the laws of nature! It's blasphemy water!"
====
Nu discovers a small bag inside a latrine, obviously hidden there intentionally.
Nu: ""What's in the bag? Is it sh*t? Ugh. I pull it out. What's in the sh*t bag?"
====
At the end of the session, OOC.
Xanlar: "Huh, we didn't actually fight anything today."
Nu: "Today's battle was against a hole in the ceiling. We took damage and everything."
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco. No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
Barbarian: I'm going to beat him mercilessly with non-lethal damage.
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=========================== Laugh at life or life will laugh at you.
Current D&D Characters: Kromen Flintfist, Hill Dwarf Order of the Scribes Wizard/Armorer Artificer Eiphrok, Half-Orc Oath of Glory Paladin/Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer
Background: the PCs are in a version of neverwinter destroyed by a magical storm, and they found a infant in a wrecked building, of course they decided to adopt the child and raise it, shortly after they get into a fight with some bandits they get roughed pretty bad, so they rest, then continue on.
DM: *Smirking and stifling a laugh* Aren’t you guys forgetting something?
Eldritch Knight IC: I know I’m forgetting something but I can’t quite put my finger on it..... THE CHILD!!!!!!!!!! *runs back*.
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco. No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco. No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
That’s an old one. And what about the firebreathing statue? And Frederika (is that how you spell it)? And Bob the water elemental?
I will be getting to those.
Good, because there great!
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This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco. No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
(Karseth the Barbarian, when attacking an ancient and all powerful being called an Archean): FOR CARE BEARS!!!
I forgot about that one. Karseth was great.
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This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco. No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
Karseth has definitely been your funniest character. Even Phil was less funny.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco. No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
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🤔
Life is very busy unfortunately, gone from most Pbp's indefinitely.
If you'd like to contact me, I am on Discord at GreatAxeblade#7595, always happy to chat :)
Homebrew races: ~Otterfolk! Play as a otter!~ Playable Dryad! (Literally just the monster sheet ported to player race)
Sauce Archpriest!- Join the Supreme Court of Sauces! Join the Cult of Cults! EXTENDED SIGNATURE Tooltips
Note to self: Find a way to prevent Jeeves from jumpscaring those he pops up next to, for his health.
Agreed. Petition to keep Jeeves safe, he is too helpful to keep being dented.
Some highlights from our last few sessions:
"I tried to become leader of the alligators but it didn't work."
"It's because you didn't have lemonade."
~~~
"Can you help us lift our dead omen?"
~~~
(Casting Mind Sliver) "Eat my migraine, you bastard!"
~~~
"Ghost summons the spirits of angry, traumatized child labourers and unionizes them in the afterlife."
~~~
"Glenn is full of murder."
"Like a cat."
"Also full of rat."
"Like a cat."
~~~
"True friends give frantic chase after you in the night. They don't suck your O+ out through your carotid."
Jude, He/They
Former gnome evocation wizard and dhampir fey wanderer ranger, current simic hybrid aberrant mind sorcerer
Rookie Call of Cthulhu Keeper
Seventh level party of Ferrin (half elf wizard), Sister Serena (aasimar cleric), Venn (tiefling sorcerer), Xanlar (half elf paladin), and Nu (axolotl shifter druid), plus NPCs Phillip (human ranger) and "the kobold" (who's name we still haven't learned). The party is leading a group of NPCs they rescued from a sacrifice ritual, several of whom are wounded, maimed, or otherwise not in fighting shape. Also there's Al, Xanlar and Venn's old sergeant who has since revealed himself to be a Fravian [enemy nation] expatriate who ran away and before joining the army of Solstice [Venn, Xanlar, and Serena's nation] and isn't a halfling as he appears, but some sort of fey-ish race and also a cleric of Amaunator.
DM notes that Xanlar's sentient, blood drinking dagger, is vibrating.
Xanlar: "He's just nervous. I pet him."
====
Returning to the entrance of the underground cave we were at a few sessions ago to seek shelter and recover from the big fight, along with several wounded NPCs.
Nu: "I fall down the hole. Weeee!"
====
After "catching" several NPCs who also went down the slide-like passage before falling twenty feet to the cave floor.
Nu: "I'm like a dented plushie."
====
Serena: "Since I'm the last one and I can hear all of the noise from everybody falling and cursing below me, can I get an athletics check to roll with it for less damage?"
DM: "Roll acrobatics."
Serena: "That's dex..." *rolls a 4, modified to a 3 from Serena's dex score of 9*
DM: "You land right on your ass and take...four points of damage."
====
Serena and the only female NPC go over to an obscured corner to bathe in the underground lake away from the otherwise male PC/NPCs. And Nu. Al turns and looks at Nu.
Al: "What about this...uh, person? Um, are you a boy or a girl?"
Nu: "Huh?"
Al: "Uh, nevermind."
====
Speaking to Mikhail, a twelve year old child soldier recruit that was rescued.
Serena: "We need to get these people away from the front and to someplace safe. All the way back to Solstice if possible. Don't take this the wrong way but you're way too young to be out here."
Mikhail: "Oh, I agree miss! I think I'm way too young to be out here, too!"
Al: "You're all way too young to be out here."
Serena "I am an adult and I can make my own decisions." *OOC notes that Serena is seventeen*
Al: "I am a hundred and fifty years old. You're all kids to me."
Serena: "Who was rescuing who just yesterday?"
Al: "Good point. You can make your own decisions."
====
Speaking of the evil guy that was leading the ritual we interrupted.
Serena: "He called you 'brother,' are you actually related or was that just because you're similar or from the same place or something."
Al: "We grew up together but we're not related. He...went down a different path. He became dark, and strong. But you did something nobody has for a long time. You hurt him."
Serena: "Well, I was trying to hurt him a lot more but he got away."
====
Trying to figure out how to get everybody up through the twenty foot high hole in the ceiling.
Kobold: "Can't the pink thing just turn into a giant scarab or something and climb up with the rope?"
Nu: "What's a scarab? I've never seen one of those."
*Kobold picks up a scarab from the cave floor and holds it up in front of Nu*
Kobold: "It's this."
Nu*ooc*: "I eat it."
After a rather long and somewhat amusing ordeal we manage to get everybody out. We leave most of the NPCs, except for Al, at the village of the bullywugs we've befriended and set out for the former hideout of a disgraced Solstice officer on the run. Ferrin is hoping to get some information from him. DM calls for survival rolls to navigate the jungle. Serena and Nu do not roll well.
Serena "I am definitely somewhere."
Nu: "I think we're back in the cave."
The hideout is built as a tavern in the middle of the jungle. While searching it, Venn and Xanlar get into the liquor supplies which include some very nice booze. Venn tries explaining liquor to Nu.
Venn:" It's, uh, water. But spicy. Like it has fire in it."
Nu: "Fire? In water? That's against the laws of nature! It's blasphemy water!"
====
Nu discovers a small bag inside a latrine, obviously hidden there intentionally.
Nu: ""What's in the bag? Is it sh*t? Ugh. I pull it out. What's in the sh*t bag?"
====
At the end of the session, OOC.
Xanlar: "Huh, we didn't actually fight anything today."
Nu: "Today's battle was against a hole in the ceiling. We took damage and everything."
Your stories are great.
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco.
No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
Context: Riczu (A 1st level grung artificer) is listening to satyr play "A boss is approaching"
Me *ooc*: I want to start playing the soviet anthe- (Realization) What if Riczu is a communist Grung?
Crusher of Cranium in the "oops, i accidentally destroyed someones brain" cult.
I sell bamboozle insurance
Barbarian: I'm going to beat him mercilessly with non-lethal damage.
===========================
Laugh at life or life will laugh at you.
Current D&D Characters:
Kromen Flintfist, Hill Dwarf Order of the Scribes Wizard/Armorer Artificer
Eiphrok, Half-Orc Oath of Glory Paladin/Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer
Background: the PCs are in a version of neverwinter destroyed by a magical storm, and they found a infant in a wrecked building, of course they decided to adopt the child and raise it, shortly after they get into a fight with some bandits they get roughed pretty bad, so they rest, then continue on.
DM: *Smirking and stifling a laugh* Aren’t you guys forgetting something?
Eldritch Knight IC: I know I’m forgetting something but I can’t quite put my finger on it..... THE CHILD!!!!!!!!!! *runs back*.
Mystic v3 should be official, nuff said.
You don't have parents! They are made of bread!
i can roll nat 1s on command
my homebrew thingies
Magic Items - Monsters - Subclasses
Karseth eat bricks! Bricks tasty!
That’s a great one.
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco.
No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
That’s an old one. And what about the firebreathing statue? And Frederika (is that how you spell it)? And Bob the water elemental?
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco.
No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
(Karseth the Barbarian, when attacking an ancient and all powerful being called an Archean): FOR CARE BEARS!!!
I will be getting to those.
Good, because there great!
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco.
No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
I forgot about that one. Karseth was great.
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco.
No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.
PC: What do you call that water elemental that you keep summoning with your bowl of water elemantal summoning?
Karseth: Bob. Bob Karseth´s adopted son.
PC: Why do you keep kissing your maul?
Karseth: Her name Fredericka, and she Karseth´s wife.
Karseth has definitely been your funniest character. Even Phil was less funny.
This isn't actually a signature, just something I copy and paste onto the bottom of all my posts. Or is it? Yep, it is. Or is it..? I’m a hobbit, and the master cranial imploder of the "Oops, I Accidently Destroyed Someone's Brain" cult. Extended sig. I'm actually in Limbo, it says I'm in Mechanus because that's where I get my WiFi from. Please don't tell the modrons, they're still angry from the 'Spawning Stone' fiasco.
No connection to Dragonslayer8 other than knowing them in real life.