I have two arms thank you very much

I don’t think you’re un-intelligent. You just have bad luck with thinking.

Whereas all your thinking is purely good luck

Wow! A thought crossed your mind? The journey must have been long and lonely.

not as lonely as you though

Not lonely enough. I’m jealous of the people that haven’t met you.

if you're so sick of me, why can't you be bothered to up and leave this chat? Are you really that lazy?

No, it simply brings me more joy to roast you. 

If i ever said anything to offend you, it was completely and purely intentional.

Offend me? You're going to have to try harder. Your insults are puny and weak!

Wow. Honestly, I’m surprised. You aren’t as bad as people say!

you’re a whole lot worse! Who knew you as dead inside as me, not caring about anything anybody says!

Fey aren't even the best monsters

Now honestly, i expect a better opinion from you! Oh wait-… no i don’t.

I should be a capital letter!

You’re being Quite original here.

This is, once again, sarcasm.

No, literally, I should be a capital letter! I'm clearly more important than the other letters.

Oh look! We’ve spotted a Narcissist! If only it were justified.

Most of the world's most successful people are narcissists, so maybe I'm destined for greatness

Too bad! The fates forgot you existed. No destiny for you.

No destiny means I have the freedom to do what I want. You are a puppet of fate, forced to obey their every command

Unfortunately you simply aren’t good enough to do anything with that freedom.