If I can't find M. Twain, maybe he can find me? I put more sauce on my middle finger, which makes it glow and grow. Soon you can see it from far away, a blinking, very long middle finger that sends following message over and over again:
While forming the following forms (possible because of extra joints) :
If MT knows the morse code or can interpret the middle finger, I can just wait for him.
suddenly, you feel like something stabbed your giant middle finger. its quite painful. then, you can't feel anything past the 27th joint, which is to say,the joint which exits the house. that's quite strange.
I search around for any keyhole or anything. If I find nothing, I head back to the village and ask the village leader about it.
[1/1] Village Leader: Hm? Oh, that's a key to the . we need them for the dungeon-clearing runs. (you did not find a keyhole) (pulse happens) (minimalist dop for the win and faster finish and sleep-on-time)
Before exiting the sidequest, I take a look at the strangely colored patch of floor.
you find... a mindless ectoplasmic replica of the Godmodders body, under a medium-level cloaking effect, without a soul that you can detect. hmmmm.... Hmmmm... HMMMMMM? Ectoplasmic Godmodder Body (soulless, immobile) 300/300 HP
I give piono a cookie that he eats gaining one action that he puts into the machine and also ask why he winced in pain when putting the mammoth and squid in stasis
someone either must have a small knife or an icicle, which would be more likely because I don't feel anything beyond the 27. joint ... no I take that back. I can't feel anything beyond the 27. joint so my bone must have vanished from reality since I can't feel it with my attunement or someone injected me with a drug that makes me unable to use my attunement on that part and cut it off OR someone obliterated me and this is an simulation. I know someone who made Harry Potters bones vanish: Gilderoy Lockarth. Oh wait. This isn't the house of Gilderoy Lockhart. Or is Markus Twain actually...
HMMMMMMMM......... :THONK:
But I should be able to feel my finger if only my bone is gone. Maybe they/he cut it off? Either way... what should I do now?
Investigate the scene right? I pull myself with my middle finger to the place where my sensations were cut off.
An entity tab pops up on my interface. Huh. Must be because I have the Excalium Orbital Cannon now.
Entities:
Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 2/20, 35A
Portable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply. Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge while I begin work on something new...
Super Soldier Camp: 1/15
you immediately come across the first problem: where to get the people. aside from players, their summons, and the Godmodder, this area is pretty much barren of people (probably because it's not a city or anything, but those ruins GENE found suggest it may have been one, once.). Minor correction for your entities tab, the cannon's [IIIIIIII] thing has each bar go dark red, then bright red, with dark red being 1 charge and bright being 2, to save space Adn b speshuil pl+s dorfinte.
I'm going to start putting the max and min price tags on the charges so people know how much they can get charged and how much they need to claim it. I'll fix up the formatting when I get a computer tomorrow.
2.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Okay. Log Goblin Zombie gets some stabbing now. He appears to be under the incorrect assumtion he is all that and a bag of chips. In reality, however, he is a zombie.
I also reassure Cuphead with false confidence. "Of course, of course, I'll bring you home as soon as we've vanquished the Godmodder. Until then, 'could use your help."
Orders: Hmmm... maybe if Cuphead, Perry, and The Faithful Hound all target the same spot on the eishalon, we'll at least be able to make a weak spot. It's worth a shot!
... ... all that and a bag of chips? I have no idea what it means, but somehow I found it amusing. you avoid the spinning log (fun fact, spin moves are more-or-less the worst option in real life) and stab the Log Goblin Zombie in like... the shoulder or something. this does 20 damage, and in the resulting pain the Log Goblin Zombie's grip on the Log loosens (-10% Grip). it keeps spinning from momentum, though, and knocks you away (Heavy Injuryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy wait... you dispelled your invisibility and got shadiamond'd, didn't you? This entire action should be impossible. retroactively reducing damage... After plowing into the ground near cuphead, you reassure them. Cuphead gained statuses: Temporal Preservation,Temporary hope [lasts until half HP]. Also, the hound got turned into shadiamond. it cannot act.
I give piono a cookie that he eats gaining one action that he puts into the machine and also ask why he winced in pain when putting the mammoth and squid in stasis
you charge to piono, and... huh, good question. I'm guessing it's because he was spending an action to do something other then charge.
I use Wish and take the Godmodder out of existence
you take him out of existence. The Godmodder pats you on the shoulder pleasantly and has a nice, long talk about all sorts of things. then, suddenly, he dispels your magic, returning to existence, time barely having passed while you were absent. shame, the conversation was just getting interesting... Also, welcome to the game!
EORR Perry attacks the Manifest of Folly. Cuphead joins him in the attack, but since the current attack is spread, it also attacks the log goblin zombie (which is no longer SPINNY ATTACK OF DOOM-ing, since it hit aeisenberg) for 20. the manifest rolls a 6 (+16) against Perrys first attack, or 22... but Perry has 30A, so that's 1 damage mite! no matter what it rolls, the remaining 8A can't hit the eishalon, so it still has 1 damage mite. then, the curse activates... now, the shadiamond resistance should make success impossible, but I rolled it anyway on a whim anddddd it rolled a 6. combined with it being struck by cuphead's 20 damage, this kills the eishalon. ....Geh, I can't find the image I made for uploading here. Ok, I got home and now can find it. However, I can't seem to find a way to link the image and have it display properly, so instead I am linking the page. The Eishalon does die though. The Godmodder winces at that, clutching his face for a moment, and takes 1 damage. huh, lower then normal. the Eishalons tendrils and body crack some more, and the three masks fall to the ground, landing slightly scattered around the eishalon. its tendrils loosen around the Coronal Relic, which drops to the floor as well, and rolls over to Aeisenberg. It also drops the Eishaic Scythe and Starflesh Staff, free for people to claim
of course, this does not keep me from continuing to updaLOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE: LOG TRUST ...it can't even spell? anyway, the Log Goblin Zombie is charging its log with some kind of energy and is going to shoot some kind of vaugely-defined energy beam at... lets say The Excalium Orbital Cannon, that thing's in the air so it makes as much sense as any entity-based attacks on it will. The radiation enforcer fires on the spot of air... where the Zombie assassin is! it was about to go insane from radiation anyway, so the amplification of radiation to kill it is smart of the Godmodder...how did he kill it when standard radioactivity is the problem and shadiamond only slows you down/petrifies you with a twist? well, he amplified Light radiation(as in photons). the Zombie Assassin starts burning up... Then the Godmodder grabs the assassin and punches it so hard it phases through the floor and ends up in the Jumble room, where the Godmodder stabs it with a toaster. 93✤+73✹ damage, which it survives wait no nevermind he shot it with a ceiling. A very special, completely unique ceiling... he has twelve more in the basement.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP4/4 5/5 Do you feel like wolf kabob Roth vantage? On his hopping high horse, which he is also wielding as a dire chain? [AG-Shard II]Eishalon II - Manifest OfFolly00 damage mites retainer of Folly x2 1 dm .2 dma (0% shadiamond) [A] Perry the Platypus 28/200 HP 10AC (+5 HP per turn) 30A owned by aeisenberg. 75% diamond (cannot increase) [A] Cuphead 85/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 2/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope [A] Tarasque portal (100% Clogged by diamond statues of Tarasque.) [OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 2/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero [OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema [AG] LOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE 80/120 HP Log Grip: 65% Log Durability: 100% Average attack: 35 State: Log Thrust at EOC. 15% shadiamond. [AG-A] Radiation enforcer (aimed somewhere) [AOOGA]Zombie assassin DED.
Piono: 74% shadiamond (invis) Carleah: 95% shadiamond Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff) seriously injured. 100% shadiamond, 100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan) Evonix: 75% shadiamond. transparent, meaning shadiamond will not further harm them. Algot: 34% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed. Goldhello: lite injruy. Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10 ). 8 Soul points. GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13mrald-goop,zombie mage corpse Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G]Eishalon Mask [D]Eishalon mask [F]
someone either must have a small knife or an icicle, which would be more likely because I don't feel anything beyond the 27. joint ... no I take that back. I can't feel anything beyond the 27. joint so my bone must have vanished from reality since I can't feel it with my attunement or someone injected me with a drug that makes me unable to use my attunement on that part and cut it off OR someone obliterated me and this is an simulation. I know someone who made Harry Potters bones vanish: Gilderoy Lockarth. Oh wait. This isn't the house of Gilderoy Lockhart. Or is Markus Twain actually...
HMMMMMMMM......... :THONK:
But I should be able to feel my finger if only my bone is gone. Maybe they/he cut it off? Either way... what should I do now?
Investigate the scene right? I pull myself with my middle finger to the place where my sensations were cut off.
I was actually talking about normal feeling, like what normal people without magic feel if you stab them. through attunement, you felt... large amounts of the sensory input vanishing, the pattern suggesting something similar to a knife that gets rid of the flesh it touches, or perhaps a sort of electric-bolt-like pattern of destruction. whatever it was isn't solid, so you couldn't sense it. Also, I literally said, in plain english, that the harry potter reference was a jooooooooke. Anyway, you pull yourself there and see...
The big red bit is blood from your finger, and the skin-color stuff is also from finger. also, it's supposed to loop slower- with a longer pause after the cyan thing vanishes- but i can't change it now
The shopkeeper nods to JOE's response to Algot's question. "I'm under contract to spend as much of my effort as possible manufacturing stuff for the shop. A very strict contract."
The shopkeep has an idea an picks up both the Eishaic Scythe and Starflesh Staff. If this doesn't take up his action, he scans the Scythe with an action. He winces in pain.
4.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
The shopkeep takes a deep breath, and does one of the following: If it took a full action to pick up the Eishaic Scythe, he picks up the Starflesh Staff If he picked up both, he uses his second action of the round to scan the Starflesh Staff. He shudders.
4.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 3/20, 35A
Portable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply. Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge...
Super Soldier Camp: 2/15
Well... technically we live in a multiverse where EVERYONE exists. I can grab people from different dimensions if they are willing to sign up from the program.
The shopkeeper nods to JOE's response to Algot's question. "I'm under contract to spend as much of my effort as possible manufacturing stuff for the shop. A very strict contract."
The shopkeep has an idea an picks up both the Eishaic Scythe and Starflesh Staff. If this doesn't take up his action, he scans the Scythe with an action. He winces in pain.
4.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
well, Technically, only Aeisenberg has been established to have scan as an ability, and for them it's a free action unless somehow resisted. but you're still getting some information so like stuff! Eishaic Scythe Fast attack speed [Damage Muted] Designed for series of attacks and long-range swings from a sort of prehensile tail or tendril, this scythe is somewhat difficult to use normally. the handle and blade are approximately the same in length- as long as the average person is tall (though the blade is somewhat longer, and the handle somewhat shorter). its usefulness in combat is doubtful for humans, but it has one known ability: Destroying Information. as well, it radδزاԶիꦙꦄꦄꦄ꧀ꦛ ЃгІЛѲ
The shopkeep takes a deep breath, and does one of the following: If it took a full action to pick up the Eishaic Scythe, he picks up the Starflesh Staff If he picked up both, he uses his second action of the round to scan the Starflesh Staff. He shudders.
4.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
There's less information discovered about the staff, but less already known as well. Pure Starflesh Staff Normal attack speed [Damage Muted] Created Fully-formed from the same Starflesh of an Eishalons life,This wand glows with Celestial energy, Intermixed in a strange симбиотన్నజీవిrelationship with the native Grief energy. a double helix of branch-shaped flesh is on one end, while the other becomes gradually less smooth before tapering to a point. the abilities of this staff are less clear then the Scythes, but it definitely has some.
Why does this cause you to shudder? does the contract not leave an opening for plans that are very likely more action-efficient, but are not directly charging?
Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 3/20, 35A
Portable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply. Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge...
Super Soldier Camp: 2/15
Well... technically we live in a multiverse where EVERYONE exists. I can grab people from different dimensions if they are willing to sign up from the program.
well...yes. that is the brute force solution, so to speak. just summoning whatever you need. it is, indeed, always an option. just like saying you summon whatever materials you need for the cannon, without logic or detail, would always be an option. (I mostly give charge boosts for either specific things I think up beforehand, or things I think are creative, interesting, or funny. however, there is a second problem with that approach:) also, being from different dimensions means they won't have the same genes etc- similar, probably, if you select for humanoid carbonbased etc etc, but not anyway near as close to the same as within a single reality, so you would need to find out how to supersoldieriffy each instance separately.
Mk. I go around town asking if people need any help other than getting emeralds.
well, the farming few want help obtaining water( there is a supply, but it's limited to how much the elder villagers make). the monster chunks guy takes an interest in your hat, and would like to know if he can have the rest of the monsters parts. the Egg merchant would like help acquiring wheat for his chickens, meat for his vultures, or seeds for his pigeons (Vultures are the most wanted: there's no meat for them except the dead of his chickens/pigeons, which he can't make fast enough. the pigeons/chickens can survive off apples and potatoes). the feather merchant would like you to help him obtain steal Soav or chicken feathers, especially surprisingly rigid ones, from the egg merchant. there might be other stuff but nothing else comes to mind at the moment- if anything does, I'll edit it and message you.
A dark mysterious figure. I let my minion shine the flashlight at the figure to make it less dark. Maybe even less mysterious.
Depending on what you meant about the figure, you either find a dark red grave marker whos designer thought they were being Clever, or that the blue thing is gone. one other thing you notice is that some parts of the cliffs don't seem to brighten from the light, suggesting the cliffs are naturally dark as opposed to just in shadow.
Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 4/20, 35A
Portable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply. Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge...
Super Soldier Camp: 3/15
Valid point. A more convenient way would be the dwarfs who live in their mountain vaults of sort. They SURVIVED. xD
"Please don't question it, I lost a bet, that's all you need to know." Anyways, the shopkeep adds the new items to the storefront, they cost 5 and 4 credits respectively.
5.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
I should return my middle finger to its normal state first before exploring though. I eat the opposite of sauce: a bowl. This returns my middle finger to its normal (and healthy) state... but it still won't stop sending this morse code. Well... I guess I'll live with it.
Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge[IIIIIIII] 4/20, 35A
Portable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply. Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge...
Super Soldier Camp: 3/15
Valid point. A more convenient way would be the dwarfs who live in their mountain vaults of sort. They SURVIVED. xD
Err: Excalium Cannon Charge increments when EORR is shown, not when you post the dwarves, you say? hm... after stealing hungry visitors book and reading the 'dwarven' section, you find that dwarves are native to mallet, and have never been known to visit the landmass you are on. also, they like trading even more then villagers: there are rumors you can barter your way from novelty items to divine artifacts.
"Please don't question it, I lost a bet, that's all you need to know." Anyways, the shopkeep adds the new items to the storefront, they cost 5 and 4 credits respectively.
5.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
on the one hand this would normally make me more curious. on the other hand it probably doesn't have any more details then 'noodle incident'. Anyway u chluisdbfk and declare you'll sell people those things for that amount. the Godmodder then walks up to you. GODMODDER: Hey, if you put on one of the masks for 10 rounds I'll pay you... something. definitely something at least. I'm open to negotiation. ITS A TARP! or is it? you never can tell with Godmodders. I hear he randomly proposes genuine deals some time after any non-genuine one, just to keep people on their toes. or does he? you just can't tell!
I whip out a rug. Do not ask where I got the rug from. I throw my rug at the Log Goblin Zombie. the second the rug makes contact, it lights on fire.
Orders: Keep up the assault on the Eishalon! No such thing as a perfect defense!
FWOOLOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE: AHHHHHHHH! WHAT IS THIS THING! AAAAAAAAA! IT BURNS!OOSH. the LOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE is currently wrestling with a flaming rug. unless it gets really lucky, this keeps it from maintaining the projectile aimed at the Excalium Orbital Cannon. just like how I won't ask where you got the rug from, I also will not ask how you threw it, given you are currently missing all your muscles. you are solid diamond. you should do something about that. You feel the coronal relic grow slightly warmer as the log goblin zombie burns... Also, the eishalon is dead. all that's left are retainers of folly. and only two of them. the cannon charges! Perry and Cuphead attack the remaining retainers. Cuphead's chaser is rather good at neutralizing all Grace based rolls, and perry does well enough for himself as well. The eishalon is finally, fully dead! So why isn't the Godmodder taking any more damage? Man does he look smug about that. The Log Goblin Zombie is screeching incoherently at the fire (thank me incoherent noise isn't printed. you're so lucky you don't need to listen to this), but a lucky movement throws the rug off. they're too late to restablize the log thrust, but theLOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE:MIRTH STOILLOG DANKS! mirth... stoil...? ok, they probably mean style, but... mirth...? danks is probably thanks, and... hm. Well, they're waving the log around like they're imitating a master swordperson or something, but they're not good enough to succeed. they can still bludgeon... cuphead, if they hit him. The Godmodder proceeds to charge at Cuphead, wildly swinging his hopping high horse dire chain. DIE, YOU... ANTHROPOMORPHIC CUP GU pfft GODMODDER: What's so funny? nothing, nothing, Carry on. Sadly for the Godmodder, Cuphead manages to make a fundamental discovery as to the nature of horses, and Dodges [88, DC25/100] his large dire chain horse.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP4/4 5/5 Do you feel like wolf kabob Roth vantage? On his hopping high horse, which he is also wielding as a dire chain? [AG-Shard II]Eishalon II - Manifest OfFollyDEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is. [A] Perry the Platypus 33/200 HP 10AC (+5 HP per turn) 30A owned by aeisenberg. 75% diamond (cannot increase) [A] Cuphead 85/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 3/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope [A] Tarasque portal (100% Clogged by diamond statues of Tarasque.) [OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 3/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero [OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema [AG] LOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE 80/120 HP Log Grip: 75 (permenant -5)% Log Durability: 100% Average attack: 35 State: danks attack on Cuphead. 20% shadiamond. [AG-A] Radiation enforcer (ready... aiming at Perry)
Piono: 74% shadiamond (invis) Carleah: 95% shadiamond Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff) seriously injured. 100% shadiamond, 100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan) Evonix: 75% shadiamond. transparent, meaning shadiamond will not further harm them. Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed. Goldhello: lite injruy. Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10 ). 8 Soul points. GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13mrald-goop,zombie mage corpse Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G]Eishalon Mask [D]Eishalon mask [F]
I should return my middle finger to its normal state first before exploring though. I eat the opposite of sauce: a bowl. This returns my middle finger to its normal (and healthy) state... but it still won't stop sending this morse code. Well... I guess I'll live with it.
the opposite of sauce... is a bowl. of course it is! OF COURSE! your finger is now the size of a normal finger. Nothing in particular happens while you are doing this.
With this in mind, I go forth looking for monsters, caves, loot, and whatnot.
I will continue looking every round until I find something.
you walk back through the area you were earlier, with the cave. your mental loot detector says the cave you already visited is loot-y. this is some very useful information, if not for the fact that you have already visited it. on the other hand, your mental inexploitability detector (which is to say, me talking about the concept of inexploitability, which boils down to 'if it's easy and everyone can do it, its not going to give you an advantage') says that if you want to make money, you're going to need to take advantage of something other people here can't. they can all walk around in the viscinity of the town, so you need something better. maybe you can take advantage of your weapons multi-elemental nature,or of that fact that you are unlikely to settle down here, so making the guy selling chicken eggs hate you isn't your concern. your advantage so far was the Godmodder throwing enemies at you, but with the manifest dead he's going to be somewhat more busy... maybe you can take advantage of having contact with all the other players in the other dimension? there's bound to be stuff they can find easily that's rare here.
I take the flashlight from my minion and order it to explore the surrounding area. I also take out a very good camera to film its progress... maybe it won't return.
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suddenly, you feel like something stabbed your giant middle finger. its quite painful. then, you can't feel anything past the 27th joint, which is to say,the joint which exits the house. that's quite strange.
[1/1] Village Leader: Hm? Oh, that's a key to the . we need them for the dungeon-clearing runs.
(you did not find a keyhole)
(pulse happens)
(minimalist dop for the win and faster finish and sleep-on-time)
[40-Ma] Woobydoobydoo 446/597 ❤, pulse for 1 Equipped:
stick- Cool staff bro (unidentified)(two-handed) ? damage,
hat- corrupt beast's jaw (unidentified)(150 hp, min ~13 str, - 9 regen)
Chestplate- Shining gold chestplate (+247 HP) 8 soul Points 18/20 ✹ 37257/46000 XP Bubbles! (10 regen, thorns X) known spells: Heal (R-L-R), Teleport (R-R-R), Meteor (R-L-L), Ice snake (R-R-L)
Buffs: 15% crit chance, +15% non-crit damage, -14% to incoming damage, 14% dodge chance, -15% mana cost (random rounding), +15% ✹, ✦, elemental damage, +14% other elemental damage.
Wobbydoobydoo : key, beast jaw, cool staff bro, bbls, shining gold chestplate, unidentified leggings , 10+207 , thank-you note, weird "compass"
you find... a mindless ectoplasmic replica of the Godmodders body, under a medium-level cloaking effect, without a soul that you can detect.
hmmmm....
Hmmmm...
HMMMMMM?
Ectoplasmic Godmodder Body (soulless, immobile) 300/300 HP
I chlug, this somehow manifests into a pile of metal in a distant dimension.
3.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Credits:
Algot: 1
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
I give piono a cookie that he eats gaining one action that he puts into the machine and also ask why he winced in pain when putting the mammoth and squid in stasis
someone either must have a small knife or an icicle, which would be more likely because I don't feel anything beyond the 27. joint ... no I take that back. I can't feel anything beyond the 27. joint so my bone must have vanished from reality since I can't feel it with my attunement or someone injected me with a drug that makes me unable to use my attunement on that part and cut it off OR someone obliterated me and this is an simulation. I know someone who made Harry Potters bones vanish: Gilderoy Lockarth. Oh wait. This isn't the house of Gilderoy Lockhart. Or is Markus Twain actually...
HMMMMMMMM......... :THONK:
But I should be able to feel my finger if only my bone is gone. Maybe they/he cut it off?
Either way... what should I do now?
Investigate the scene right? I pull myself with my middle finger to the place where my sensations were cut off.
I use Wish and take the Godmodder out of existence
"Halt your wagging and wag your halters, for I am mastercryomancer!"
Check out my Expanded Signature
mhk.
mhhh... ok. shadiamondification neutralized.
you immediately come across the first problem: where to get the people. aside from players, their summons, and the Godmodder, this area is pretty much barren of people (probably because it's not a city or anything, but those ruins GENE found suggest it may have been one, once.).
Minor correction for your entities tab, the cannon's [IIIIIIII] thing has each bar go dark red, then bright red, with dark red being 1 charge and bright being 2, to save space
Adn b speshuil pl+s dorfinte.y'chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarge.
... ... all that and a bag of chips?
I have no idea what it means, but somehow I found it amusing. you avoid the spinning log (fun fact, spin moves are more-or-less the worst option in real life) and stab the Log Goblin Zombie in like... the shoulder or something.
this does 20 damage, and in the resulting pain the Log Goblin Zombie's grip on the Log loosens (-10% Grip). it keeps spinning from momentum, though, and knocks you away (Heavy Injuryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy wait... you dispelled your invisibility and got shadiamond'd, didn't you? This entire action should be impossible. retroactively reducing damage...
After plowing into the ground near cuphead, you reassure them.
Cuphead gained statuses: Temporal Preservation,Temporary hope [lasts until half HP].
Also, the hound got turned into shadiamond. it cannot act.
because of course it does... the dimension probably isn't that far away, since anything outside a certain distance is semi-blocked.
you charge to piono, and... huh, good question. I'm guessing it's because he was spending an action to do something other then charge.
you take him out of existence. The Godmodder pats you on the shoulder pleasantly and has a nice, long talk about all sorts of things. then, suddenly, he dispels your magic, returning to existence, time barely having passed while you were absent. shame, the conversation was just getting interesting... Also, welcome to the game!
EORR
Perry attacks the Manifest of Folly. Cuphead joins him in the attack, but since the current attack is spread, it also attacks the log goblin zombie (which is no longer SPINNY ATTACK OF DOOM-ing, since it hit aeisenberg) for 20. the manifest rolls a 6 (+16) against Perrys first attack, or 22... but Perry has 30A, so that's 1 damage mite! no matter what it rolls, the remaining 8A can't hit the eishalon, so it still has 1 damage mite. then, the curse activates... now, the shadiamond resistance should make success impossible, but I rolled it anyway on a whim anddddd it rolled a 6. combined with it being struck by cuphead's 20 damage, this kills the eishalon.
....Geh, I can't find the image I made for uploading here.
Ok, I got home and now can find it.
However, I can't seem to find a way to link the image and have it display properly, so instead I am linking the page.
The Eishalon does die though. The Godmodder winces at that, clutching his face for a moment, and takes 1 damage. huh, lower then normal.
the Eishalons tendrils and body crack some more, and the three masks fall to the ground, landing slightly scattered around the eishalon. its tendrils loosen around the Coronal Relic, which drops to the floor as well, and rolls over to Aeisenberg.
It also drops the Eishaic Scythe and Starflesh Staff, free for people to claim
of course, this does not keep me from continuing to updaLOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE: LOG TRUST
...it can't even spell? anyway, the Log Goblin Zombie is charging its log with some kind of energy and is going to shoot some kind of vaugely-defined energy beam at... lets say The Excalium Orbital Cannon, that thing's in the air so it makes as much sense as any entity-based attacks on it will.
The radiation enforcer fires on the spot of air... where the Zombie assassin is! it was about to go insane from radiation anyway, so the amplification of radiation to kill it is smart of the Godmodder...how did he kill it when standard radioactivity is the problem and shadiamond only slows you down/petrifies you with a twist? well, he amplified Light radiation(as in photons). the Zombie Assassin starts burning up...
Then the Godmodder grabs the assassin and punches it so hard it phases through the floor and ends up in the Jumble room, where the Godmodder stabs it with a toaster. 93✤+73✹ damage, which it survives wait no nevermind he shot it with a ceiling. A very special, completely unique ceiling... he has twelve more in the basement.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP 4/4 5/5 Do you feel like wolf kabob Roth vantage? On his hopping high horse, which he is also wielding as a dire chain?
[AG-Shard II] Eishalon II - Manifest Of Folly 00 damage mites
retainer of Folly x2 1 dm .2 dma (0% shadiamond)
[A] Perry the Platypus 28/200 HP 10AC (+5 HP per turn) 30A owned by aeisenberg. 75% diamond (cannot increase)
[A] Cuphead 85/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 2/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope
[A] Tarasque portal (100% Clogged by diamond statues of Tarasque.)
[OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/
200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 2/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero[OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema
[AG] LOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE 80/120 HP Log Grip: 65% Log Durability: 100% Average attack: 35 State: Log Thrust at EOC. 15% shadiamond.
[AG-A] Radiation enforcer (aimed somewhere)
[AOOGA] Zombie assassin DED.
Piono: 74% shadiamond (invis)
Carleah: 95% shadiamond
Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff) seriously injured. 100% shadiamond, 100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan)
Evonix: 75% shadiamond. transparent, meaning shadiamond will not further harm them.
Algot: 34% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed.
Goldhello: lite injruy.
Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10 ). 8 Soul points.
GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13 mrald-goop,zombie mage corpse
Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G] Eishalon Mask [D] Eishalon mask [F]
I was actually talking about normal feeling, like what normal people without magic feel if you stab them. through attunement, you felt... large amounts of the sensory input vanishing, the pattern suggesting something similar to a knife that gets rid of the flesh it touches, or perhaps a sort of electric-bolt-like pattern of destruction. whatever it was isn't solid, so you couldn't sense it.
Also, I literally said, in plain english, that the harry potter reference was a jooooooooke.
Anyway, you pull yourself there and see...
The big red bit is blood from your finger, and the skin-color stuff is also from finger.
also, it's supposed to loop slower- with a longer pause after the cyan thing vanishes- but i can't change it now
The shopkeeper nods to JOE's response to Algot's question. "I'm under contract to spend as much of my effort as possible manufacturing stuff for the shop. A very strict contract."
The shopkeep has an idea an picks up both the Eishaic Scythe and Starflesh Staff. If this doesn't take up his action, he scans the Scythe with an action. He winces in pain.
4.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Credits:
Algot: 2
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Mk. I go around town asking if people need any help other than getting emeralds.
"Ignorance is bliss, and you look absolutely miserable."
The shopkeep takes a deep breath, and does one of the following:
If it took a full action to pick up the Eishaic Scythe, he picks up the Starflesh Staff
If he picked up both, he uses his second action of the round to scan the Starflesh Staff.
He shudders.
4.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Credits:
Algot: 2
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
I hack the radiation enforcer using magic and aim it at the godmodder and amplify gravity radiation or gravitrons causing him to fall to the ground
Entities:
Excalium Orbital Cannon
200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 3/20, 35APortable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply.
Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge...
Super Soldier Camp: 2/15
Well... technically we live in a multiverse where EVERYONE exists. I can grab people from different dimensions if they are willing to sign up from the program.
A dark mysterious figure. I let my minion shine the flashlight at the figure to make it less dark. Maybe even less mysterious.
well, Technically, only Aeisenberg has been established to have scan as an ability, and for them it's a free action unless somehow resisted.
but you're still getting some information so like stuff!
Eishaic Scythe
Fast attack speed
[
Damage Muted]Designed for series of attacks and long-range swings from a sort of prehensile tail or tendril, this scythe is somewhat difficult to use normally. the handle and blade are approximately the same in length- as long as the average person is tall (though the blade is somewhat longer, and the handle somewhat shorter). its usefulness in combat is doubtful for humans, but it has one known ability: Destroying Information. as well, it ra
dδزاԶիꦙꦄꦄꦄ꧀ꦛ ЃгІЛѲThere's less information discovered about the staff, but less already known as well.
Pure Starflesh Staff
Normal attack speed
[
Damage Muted]Created Fully-formed from the same Starflesh of an Eishalons life,This wand glows with Celestial energy, Intermixed in a strange симбиотన్నజీవి relationship with the native Grief energy. a double helix of branch-shaped flesh is on one end, while the other becomes gradually less smooth before tapering to a point. the abilities of this staff are less clear then the Scythes, but it definitely has some.
Why does this cause you to shudder? does the contract not leave an opening for plans that are very likely more action-efficient, but are not directly charging?
.
well...yes. that is the brute force solution, so to speak. just summoning whatever you need. it is, indeed, always an option. just like saying you summon whatever materials you need for the cannon, without logic or detail, would always be an option.
(I mostly give charge boosts for either specific things I think up beforehand, or things I think are creative, interesting, or funny. however, there is a second problem with that approach:)
also, being from different dimensions means they won't have the same genes etc- similar, probably, if you select for humanoid carbonbased etc etc, but not anyway near as close to the same as within a single reality, so you would need to find out how to supersoldieriffy each instance separately.
well, the farming few want help obtaining water( there is a supply, but it's limited to how much the elder villagers make). the monster chunks guy takes an interest in your hat, and would like to know if he can have the rest of the monsters parts. the Egg merchant would like help acquiring wheat for his chickens, meat for his vultures, or seeds for his pigeons (Vultures are the most wanted: there's no meat for them except the dead of his chickens/pigeons, which he can't make fast enough. the pigeons/chickens can survive off apples and potatoes). the feather merchant would like you to help him
obtainsteal Soav or chicken feathers, especially surprisingly rigid ones, from the egg merchant.there might be other stuff but nothing else comes to mind at the moment- if anything does, I'll edit it and message you.
[40-Ma] Woobydoobydoo 492/597 ❤, Equipped:
stick- Cool staff bro (unidentified)(two-handed) ? damage,
hat- corrupt beast's jaw (unidentified)(150 hp, min ~13 str, - 9 regen)
Chestplate- Shining gold chestplate (+247 HP) 8 soul Points 20/20 ✹ 37257/46000 XP Bubbles! (10 regen, thorns X) known spells: Heal (R-L-R), Teleport (R-R-R), Meteor (R-L-L), Ice snake (R-R-L)
Buffs: 15% crit chance, +15% non-crit damage, -14% to incoming damage, 14% dodge chance, -15% mana cost (random rounding), +15% ✹, ✦, elemental damage, +14% other elemental damage.
Wobbydoobydoo : key, beast jaw, cool staff bro, bbls, shining gold chestplate, unidentified leggings , 10+207 , thank-you note, weird "compass"
Depending on what you meant about the figure, you either find a dark red grave marker whos designer thought they were being Clever, or that the blue thing is gone.
one other thing you notice is that some parts of the cliffs don't seem to brighten from the light, suggesting the cliffs are naturally dark as opposed to just in shadow.
Entities:
Excalium Orbital Cannon
200/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 4/20, 35APortable Portalable shot: owner can use its attack alongside their own action, within their turn, at the cost of its ability to attack later. all suitable buffs to either being apply.
Orbiting Sun: slight resistance to attacks by grounded beings
The Cannon continues to build charge...
Super Soldier Camp: 3/15
Valid point. A more convenient way would be the dwarfs who live in their mountain vaults of sort. They SURVIVED. xD
"Please don't question it, I lost a bet, that's all you need to know." Anyways, the shopkeep adds the new items to the storefront, they cost 5 and 4 credits respectively.
5.6/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Credits:
Algot: 2
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
Interesting. Blackened cliff, blood red crypt...
I should return my middle finger to its normal state first before exploring though. I eat the opposite of sauce: a bowl. This returns my middle finger to its normal (and healthy) state... but it still won't stop sending this morse code. Well... I guess I'll live with it.
With this in mind, I go forth looking for monsters, caves, loot, and whatnot.
I will continue looking every round until I find something.
"Ignorance is bliss, and you look absolutely miserable."
you grab onto the enforcer... but it's still recharging from the last shot, and nothing happens!
Err: Excalium Cannon Charge increments when EORR is shown, not when you post
the dwarves, you say? hm... after stealing hungry visitors book and reading the 'dwarven' section, you find that dwarves are native to mallet, and have never been known to visit the landmass you are on. also, they like trading even more then villagers: there are rumors you can barter your way from novelty items to divine artifacts.
on the one hand this would normally make me more curious.
on the other hand it probably doesn't have any more details then 'noodle incident'.
Anyway u chluisdbfk and declare you'll sell people those things for that amount. the Godmodder then walks up to you.
GODMODDER: Hey, if you put on one of the masks for 10 rounds I'll pay you... something. definitely something at least. I'm open to negotiation.
ITS A TARP! or is it? you never can tell with Godmodders. I hear he randomly proposes genuine deals some time after any non-genuine one, just to keep people on their toes. or does he? you just can't tell!
FWOOLOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE: AHHHHHHHH! WHAT IS THIS THING! AAAAAAAAA! IT BURNS!OOSH.
the LOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE is currently wrestling with a flaming rug. unless it gets really lucky, this keeps it from maintaining the projectile aimed at the Excalium Orbital Cannon. just like how I won't ask where you got the rug from, I also will not ask how you threw it, given you are currently missing all your muscles. you are solid diamond. you should do something about that.
You feel the coronal relic grow slightly warmer as the log goblin zombie burns...
Also, the eishalon is dead. all that's left are retainers of folly. and only two of them.
the cannon charges! Perry and Cuphead attack the remaining retainers. Cuphead's chaser is rather good at neutralizing all Grace based rolls, and perry does well enough for himself as well. The eishalon is finally, fully dead!
So why isn't the Godmodder taking any more damage?
Man does he look smug about that.
The Log Goblin Zombie is screeching incoherently at the fire (thank me incoherent noise isn't printed. you're so lucky you don't need to listen to this), but a lucky movement throws the rug off. they're too late to restablize the log thrust, but theLOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE:MIRTH STOILLOG DANKS! mirth... stoil...? ok, they probably mean style, but... mirth...? danks is probably thanks, and... hm.
Well, they're waving the log around like they're imitating a master swordperson or something, but they're not good enough to succeed. they can still bludgeon... cuphead, if they hit him.
The Godmodder proceeds to charge at Cuphead, wildly swinging his hopping high horse dire chain. DIE, YOU... ANTHROPOMORPHIC CUP GU pfft
GODMODDER: What's so funny?
nothing, nothing, Carry on.
Sadly for the Godmodder, Cuphead manages to make a fundamental discovery as to the nature of horses, and Dodges [88, DC25/100] his large dire chain horse.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP 4/4 5/5 Do you feel like wolf kabob Roth vantage? On his hopping high horse, which he is also wielding as a dire chain?
[AG-Shard II] Eishalon II - Manifest Of Folly DEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is.
[A] Perry the Platypus 33/200 HP 10AC (+5 HP per turn) 30A owned by aeisenberg. 75% diamond (cannot increase)
[A] Cuphead 85/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 3/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope
[A] Tarasque portal (100% Clogged by diamond statues of Tarasque.)
[OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 200/
200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 3/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero[OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema
[AG] LOG GOBLIN ZOMBIE 80/120 HP Log Grip: 75 (permenant -5)% Log Durability: 100% Average attack: 35 State: danks attack on Cuphead. 20% shadiamond.
[AG-A] Radiation enforcer (ready... aiming at Perry)
Piono: 74% shadiamond (invis)
Carleah: 95% shadiamond
Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff) seriously injured. 100% shadiamond, 100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan)
Evonix: 75% shadiamond. transparent, meaning shadiamond will not further harm them.
Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed.
Goldhello: lite injruy.
Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10 ). 8 Soul points.
GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13 mrald-goop,zombie mage corpse
Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G] Eishalon Mask [D] Eishalon mask [F]
the opposite of sauce... is a bowl. of course it is! OF COURSE!
your finger is now the size of a normal finger.
Nothing in particular happens while you are doing this.
you walk back through the area you were earlier, with the cave.
your mental loot detector says the cave you already visited is loot-y. this is some very useful information, if not for the fact that you have already visited it.
on the other hand, your mental inexploitability detector (which is to say, me talking about the concept of inexploitability, which boils down to 'if it's easy and everyone can do it, its not going to give you an advantage') says that if you want to make money, you're going to need to take advantage of something other people here can't. they can all walk around in the viscinity of the town, so you need something better. maybe you can take advantage of your weapons multi-elemental nature,or of that fact that you are unlikely to settle down here, so making the guy selling chicken eggs hate you isn't your concern. your advantage so far was the Godmodder throwing enemies at you, but with the manifest dead he's going to be somewhat more busy... maybe you can take advantage of having contact with all the other players in the other dimension? there's bound to be stuff they can find easily that's rare here.
[40-Ma] Woobydoobydoo 494/597 ❤, Equipped:
stick- Cool staff bro (unidentified)(two-handed) ? damage,
hat- corrupt beast's jaw (unidentified)(150 hp, min ~13 str, - 9 regen)
Chestplate- Shining gold chestplate (+247 HP) 8 soul Points 20/20 ✹ 37257/46000 XP Bubbles! (10 regen, thorns X) known spells: Heal (R-L-R), Teleport (R-R-R), Meteor (R-L-L), Ice snake (R-R-L)
Buffs: 15% crit chance, +15% non-crit damage, -14% to incoming damage, 14% dodge chance, -15% mana cost (random rounding), +15% ✹, ✦, elemental damage, +14% other elemental damage.
Wobbydoobydoo : key, beast jaw, cool staff bro, bbls, shining gold chestplate, unidentified leggings , 10+207 , thank-you note, weird "compass"
I take the flashlight from my minion and order it to explore the surrounding area. I also take out a very good camera to film its progress... maybe it won't return.