I place a fully opaque box around the Tarasque Hoard an their portal that is only meant to cast a shadow on the inside of itself and thus fill up with diamonds in order to stop them from moving
I also say "hey shopkeeper make sure you are actually controlling the snake go getter so it does not eat the metal to
If voting for mayor is a free action i vote shopkeeper
Err: The Godmodder immunized the hoard against shadiamond! that is obvious, since they exist at all. mayoral voting is a free action. you have given your vote to [Shopkeeper]
"I'm not directly controlling the snake-go-getter, no, but it's been biologically engineered to go after snakes and not eat metal, so I should be fine unless there are other snakes in the pocket dimension."
33.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
The shopkeeper plucks the orange crayon out of the Maniac's hand and places an imperceptibly different color of orange crayon in his hand as he writes the shopkeep's name down. "Well if you want inspiring speeches you'll have to wait until the guy who's writing my dialogue feels a bit better, but as for twists I AM planning on summoning a giant robot in the near future, and I've got more surprises after that."
34.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
"you were already doing that. That's like if James said he was running for mayor and if he was elected, he would wear only a cheesebread box. he was already doing that. you were already doing that. you are bread. I am pineapples. the mayoral position is cheese. I am meant for them, and your defeat will elevate me. when people see me upon the position, and you crushed below me, they will immediately think "Жил был король когда-то, При нем блоха жила"- it stinks. but then, they will look again, and see that "Ya idu kuda sam tsar' idet peshkom." (it stinks). but then the truly wise of pravdan metro moschow will buy the movie rights for fifthbean killion boomals. This, I know from nothing! what, I'm going, to do?" "Kill Yo-"
"BLARGLARGLEBLUHAAAAAAAAAAAAANot Again! no! No Foliage! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" An airship flys overhead, and out falls a red sphere. then, meters from the Tree-ent, it explodes. the Tree"ent" dies. the Maniac, strangely enough, is unharmed. Cuphead uses chaser. he now has auto-attack respondy thing for 2 rounds. The LOG gasps. its bodyguards! it quickly tosses its vote in for the Maniac. then it starts trying to make a Arbor elemental to provide another vote. The maniac makes a big speech, having calmed his nerves. "Hello, everyone. citizens of 13th Avenue! dust hive bees of 121st house! Jake from pizza hut!("Thanks for the compliment. I'd vote for you, but it's called cheesebread. get it right. it's cheese. and bread. cheese on bread. cheesebread. i don't understand why people keep forgetting this.)" "AHAIM. I always keep 10 mousetraps in my pants. It's more painful than you can ever imagine, but it's worth it. You know how much shit can be done with a mouse trap? Yeah. A lot of shit. I know there are better ways to do all those things, and if I'm mayor of 13th avenue, I might just do them. but I do things unreasonably! you heard me! If I really was the kind of guy to go for the most reasonable approach, all of you would probably be dead right now. Isn't that nice, huh? Imagine if there was a version of me like that. Haha. He'd be unstoppable! Fortunately, he doesn't exist. you want to know what I'll bring to the office when I get elected? Well, I won't have an office. if you want to find me, I'll wander the streets killing people. I will stab your hated enemies between the eyes... WITH THIS KNIFE! (he waves his knife-hand in the air) "What a charming guy." "He's like me, I wanna stab people in the eyes" "I think that he makes sense, he should be president." when everyone inferior to me is dead, I will set up my office. in it, I will stand. that is, I am a lemonade stand. and I will resume my destiny, having lemonade on my back. and I will give everyone else a stand. the one from some ridiculous adventure. I swear, it is not a scam. i will not give you my limbs and declare them lemonade stands. because that WOULD BETRAY THE TRUST OF THE PEOPLE! I will be upfront and I WILL NOT BACK DOWN until every tree is conquered, every bush is burned, every shrub cooking into sweet, sweet rabbit stew... MINUS THE RABBIT! and that is not all, my dear citizens, no it is not! if someone tries to kill me, no matter who it is, I will survive! because I can't be hurt by entities. I can't be hurt by lots of things, actually, but entities are one of them! you know, I really wish I was a fire-eater! "wow, cool!" "I wish I had fire-eating skills too!" "we should vote for him!" And you know why I wish it? it's not just novelty, or cordialty, or anylty! no ,it's because If I had a penny every time I've heard someone blame their mistakes on some supernatural force, I'd almost have enough to start my own cult based around that! Well, I would if I hadn't already done it. which I did. I'm awesome that way! In Collusion, vote maniac 2013." That was. something. The Godmodder spends his action on something maniac-related. maybe the part where he ends every set of murmers with 'should vote for maniac'. or maybe something else. I don't know. by the way, you can't vote for yourself, so instead the maniac votes for some random guy who's never going to win... uh... what was his name again... oh right, jakefromcheesebreadhouse91224.
[A]Mayoral Competition.
Candidates
Maniac:1 Votes - Vote for him if you want to get a Stand! Yes, the one from that one game. or comic book. or was it an anime? the thing where when people say something is a stand, they don't mean an amusement park thing. He's giving off free Stands. It's probably a scam. It's actually just a lemonade stand, most likely. Maybe you don't want him to become the president, because even if throwing lemonade stands at people is cool and all, this fight will probably be ten times harder. Then again, it's might just be rigged in his favor anyway.
Several Shovels: 0 Votes- Vote for him if you like Reptilians! Who doesn't? They control Earth anyway, not like it makes a huge difference, just sorta... makes it more official. But who doesn't like Reptilians, right? I heard he's part of the illuminati, but that means he doesn't think he is, so be cool, ok?
"Your Name.": 1 Votes- in his own words, "all disposable income of the mayoral district will be spent on hopping up the charge stack on steroids instead of on ruining the battlefield in a decidedly Aiding-Godmodder fashion. However, to the actual citizens, you need not worry about being forgotten like the other candidates promise to, the shopkeep has keen business skills and will keep the economy running smoothly. A vote for shopkeep is a vote for true neutrality.". Vote for him if you want things to go up to 11. in the... uh... shenanigans department. sure, let's go with that.
The shopkeep stands up and goes to the speech stand.
"Ahem, fellow people, voters and Jake from Cheesebread Hut, I am announcing my candidacy as a valid member of society, and as someone who is not just a minion of the Godmodder, and thus doomed to the eventual death that all entities summoned by the Godmodder suffer eventually. The Maniac promises to be stalking the streets, stabbing your enemies in between the eyes, but how can he do that when he spends all of his time stabbing his OWN enemies in between the eyes, up until the point where his own enemies plant a dagger of their own in between his? It's a promise he has no intention of keeping, even if he had the capacity to! His entire foundation is built upon deception, as despite his claims that he cannot be hurt by many things, he also CAN be hurt by many things. Just in the past few rounds he's been hurt enough to reduce him to almost half of his initial health! And you don't want to vote for someone who dies easily, do you? It just means you'll have to listen to these stupid election speeches all over again! I'm even harder to kill than the Maniac, and, even better, I come back to life after dying due to being in a complicated meta-state of not-actually-aliveness that renders me unable to actually be killed. Not to mention, the Maniac is attempting to undermine the entire democratic process. He voted for someone who isn't even running for mayor/presidenthood! A man like that cannot be trusted with office.
But enough about the Maniac, I'm here to state my position. I have money, lots of money, and I know how to use it. I will bring great wealth to this town such that you won't need to wait for the maniac's semi-random antics to bring death to your hated enemies, but you will instead have enough money to be able to hire a hitman to do it exactly when you WANT them killed. Not only that, but I possess the capacity to put a lemonade stand on every corner, and an actual stand in the hands of those who want them. But I will hear the voice of the people, the Maniac wants to silence it. After all, how can you lovely folks voice your opinions if the Maniac's already killed you all? In short, my wonderful crowd, I urge you to vote for me. A vote for me is a vote for neutral, and aren't the neutral alignments the best ones anyways? None of the strict rules nonsense of good, and none of the requirements to drown kittens and kick puppies of evil, you are, in essence, free to do as you please! So vote for me, vote for neutrality, and vote for the future of 13th avenue."
I then vote for the Several Shovels, to counterspite the maniac for spelling You're Name wrong
35.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
It was supposed to cover to cover the ground in diamonds and thus surround them so they get stuck in a block of diamonds anyways I ad a charge to the reward
A small apologetic note arrives in the godmodders hands. "Apologies for running against your entity. It's nothing against you. It is mostly business driven, and partly driven by the fact that your maniac is unbearably obnoxious."
39.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
The shopkeep stands up and goes to the speech stand.
"Ahem, fellow people, voters and Jake from Cheesebread Hut (Oh hey, you remembered! have some cheesebread. I'm not actually a citizen since I'm supposed to be in super-Guantanamo bay. +1 jake's cheesebread.) , I am announcing my candidacy as a valid member of society, and as someone who is not just a minion of the Godmodder, and thus doomed to the eventual death that all entities summoned by the Godmodder suffer eventually (Lies! this isn't even my final form!). The Maniac promises to be stalking the streets, stabbing your enemies in between the eyes, but how can he do that when he spends all of his time stabbing his OWN enemies in between the eyes, up until the point where his own enemies plant a dagger of their own in between his?(he makes a good point.yeah, I'd rather he die so I can do the stabbing.But that'd be so boring! lets vote for the maniac anyway! ) It's a promise he has no intention of keeping, even if he had the capacity to! (Hey! I'm totally going to keep it!how, oh mayoniac?uh... not telling! but i swear i will!seems trustworthy to me my dudes.) His entire foundation is built upon deception, as despite his claims that he cannot be hurt by many things, he also CAN be hurt by many things. Just in the past few rounds he's been hurt enough to reduce him to almost half of his initial health!(I'm two, you're a zoo! if I can die, what about you? I'll never catch the flu, but guess what? now YOU DO!) And you don't want to vote for someone who dies easily, do you? It just means you'll have to listen to these stupid election speeches all over again! I'm even harder to kill than the Maniac, and, even better, I come back to life after dying due to being in a complicated meta-state of not-actually-aliveness that renders me unable to actually be killed. ("Give me your soul." the Maniac says. "No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says. "No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says. "No." the shopkeeper says. "say No." the Godmodder says. "No." the Maniac says. "Yes." the shopkeeper says. "Hah! You said yes! Now you have to give him your soul!" the Godmodder says. "No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "No." the Maniac says. "Yes." the shopkeeper says. "Hah! You said yes! Now you have to give me your soul!" the Maniac says. "Okay." the Maniac says.) Not to mention, the Maniac is attempting to undermine the entire democratic process. He voted for someone who isn't even running for mayor/presidenthood! A man like that cannot be trusted with office.(Hey, just because I'm not a citizen doesn't mean I'm running for office. I swear, some people... I'd remove my vote for you if I actually could!) (wow, this maniac is a menace.but then again muh man he stabs people in the eyes.yeah stabbing is great.)
But enough about the Maniac, I'm here to state my position. I have money, lots of money, and I know how to use it. (Gimme 32 and i'll gladly vote for you) I will bring great wealth to this town such that you won't need to wait for the maniac's semi-random antics to bring death to your hated enemies, but you will instead have enough money to be able to hire a hitman to do it exactly when you WANT them killed. (We can already do that. it's illegal.yeah who does he think he is?I can't believe this guy doesn't know that one in six people are assassins.I think He might be a bit incompetent...) Not only that, but I possess the capacity to put a lemonade stand on every corner, and an actual stand in the hands of those who want them. But I will hear the voice of the people, the Maniac wants to silence it. After all, how can you lovely folks voice your opinions if the Maniac's already killed you all? In short, my wonderful crowd, I urge you to vote for me. A vote for me is a vote for neutral, and aren't the neutral alignments the best ones anyways? None of the strict rules nonsense of good, and none of the requirements to drown kittens and kick puppies of evil, you are, in essence, free to do as you please! So vote for me, vote for neutrality, and vote for the future of 13th avenue." murmers of both approval and disapproval.
I then vote for the Several Shovels, to counterspite the maniac for spelling You're Name wrong
35.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Response to speech placed within speech for simplicity. colors other then shopkeeper color are not shopkeeper. Several Shovels voted for! you have recieved: somewhat increased voter popularity opportunity to bribe a voter 1 Jakes Cheesebread information about job distribution (1/6 people: assassins) You have lost: 1 Soul. you now have 0 souls. The Maniac has gained: 1 Soul. The maniac now has???+1 Souls The maniac has lost : Voter popularity. Time
It was supposed to cover to cover the ground in diamonds and thus surround them so they get stuck in a block of diamonds anyways I ad a charge to the reward
oh. the Tarasque are now stucl. How will they get to the voting booths like this?!
A small apologetic note arrives in the godmodders hands. "Apologies for running against your entity. It's nothing against you. It is mostly business driven, and partly driven by the fact that your maniac is unbearably obnoxious."
39.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
Godmodder: Don't I know it. he's effective, though. you have successfully passed the test: Patiensssssse- do not roleplay -interfere in any way with your snake go-getter for the round during which it is completing its mission. reward: +1.2 Charge orSnake Removal Item Tier 1
I cast a vote for the shopkeep, and go back to attacking the maniac.
Orders: take on the "Ent".
you vote shopkeeper. random note, votes are not set in stone until the election, and you can change your vote if you change your mind. You attack the maniac. man are you good at causing noun noun: attack; plural noun: attacks an instance of fierce public criticism or opposition. ! The maniac doesn't even argue against you, instead- "AAAAAAAAAAAI'M GREAT I'M GREAT I'M GREAT VOTE FOR ME I'M GREAT I'M GREAT VOTE FOR ME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA INSANITY IS THE BEST ESPECIALLY WHEN I HAVE IT BECAUSE I'M GREAT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" JUSTSHOUTING REAlly lOUD, SO... wait a second! nobody can hear you! Darn it, and those were some Amazing arguments, too! If only people had been able to hear you over the maniacs yelling, but they couldn't... I'm sure everyone would agree that the shopkeeper is better then the maniac, if only they heard you. Congratulations! by the power of completely ignoring the searing pain of multiple large, bleeding wounds for several rounds, you manage to heal back from critically wounded! this will only work once. you are still a solid diamond statue. Cuphead takes on the Ent. Wait, what ent? All we have is some PAPER. cuphead takes on the paper. the paper offers him an ETERNAL COVENANT. Cupheads worst experiences have been about contracts, especially ones he didn't read beforehand, so he refuses the covenant, which is written in -5pt font and some strange mix of hebrew, sanscrit, korean, and scribbles. instead, he shoots it. however, it survives, and becomes a voting sheet which responds to will, and goes over to the tarasque. as long as the PAPER is alive, the maniac gets an additional vote per 11 HP it possesses. also, it is protected by the sacred powers of DEMOCRACY, so find a way around those. The Maniac takes the opportunity to throw his hand at cuphead, clutching a knife. it swipes twice midflight, and misses both times, but for some reason only takes 15 damage instead of 20. maybe so the maniac won't have to go get his knife again.
The Godmodder looks at the mayoral competition... well, it's going ok. he'll step in if it looks like the maniac'll lose. Wait. is that... Cheesebread? Jakes Cheesebread? He Will have the cheesebread, he explains to piono , while he breaks open the Tarasque box and throws them at cuphead like a machine gun. Jakes cheesebread is a thing he wants.the Tarasque impact cuphead for ~10 damage, and all of them explode. except 3, that is, which stay to vote. the godmodder goes on to explain that if he does not get the Cheesebread, he will start a charge to kill Pionos next summon which doesn't get an owner.
.
[A]Mayoral Competition.
Candidates
Maniac:1+3 Votes - Vote for him if you want to get a Stand! Yes, the one from that one game. or comic book. or was it an anime? the thing where when people say something is a stand, they don't mean an amusement park thing. He's giving off free Stands. It's probably a scam. It's actually just a lemonade stand, most likely. Maybe you don't want him to become the president, because even if throwing lemonade stands at people is cool and all, this fight will probably be ten times harder. Then again, it's might just be rigged in his favor anyway.
Several Shovels: 1 Votes- Vote for him if you like Reptilians! Who doesn't? They control Earth anyway, not like it makes a huge difference, just sorta... makes it more official. But who doesn't like Reptilians, right? I heard he's part of the illuminati, but that means he doesn't think he is, so be cool, ok?
"You're Name.": 2 Votes- in his own words, "all disposable income of the mayoral district will be spent on hopping up the charge stack on steroids instead of on ruining the battlefield in a decidedly Aiding-Godmodder fashion. However, to the actual citizens, you need not worry about being forgotten like the other candidates promise to, the shopkeep has keen business skills and will keep the economy running smoothly. A vote for shopkeep is a vote for true neutrality.". Vote for him if you want things to go up to 11. in what department...? shenanigans probably.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP4/4 [AG-Shard II]Eishalon II - Manifest OfFollyDEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is.. [A] Cuphead 69/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 2/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope. 20A counter for 1! [OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 159/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 7/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero. 5% Seeded(DoT) (Stasis) [OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema [AG]PAPER. also known as: multiple thin sheaf of wood upon which people can write 33/128 HP will-based voting, protected by DEMOCRACY. [AG]"The" Maniac 8/13 HP. arm stump, gash on chest. +1 Soul [AG-Maniac] Hand 5/20 HP, on maniac shoulder. nife. [AQ] Tarasque portal (0% clogged) Tarasque Hoard (3) Trapped in diamond box
Piono: 0 Souls Eishaic Scythe, Starflesh Staff, 1 jakes cheesebread Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff)100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan) Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed. Goldhello: lite injruy. Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10 ). 8 Soul points. GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13mrald-goop,zombie mage corpse Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G]Eishalon Mask [D]Eishalon mask [F]
The shopkeep raises an eyebrow at the Godmodder, and takes a look over the cheesebread, just in case there's charge points hidden in it. He's learned from the incident with the dirt block. "Alright, I'm just going to point out that the only time I've ever actually cared about the well-being of... one of my summons? And that's because someone had already placed in an order for it. So while I invite you to blow a good 7 rounds killing a boss in one hit, I could point out that your time is better spent killing something that is actually hurting you. Alternatively, you could find something more productive to do with your time, instead of trying to do something that will get your credit account penalized for damages to my person. It'd be a real shame if you couldn't win yourself a boss from that game you've got with Algot because you were too busy spiting me." If the cheesebread doesn't have any charge value to it, the shopkeep shrugs and hands it over to the Godmodder.
The shopkeep then rounds on the Maniac. "You, my friend, are the worst psychopathic serial killer I have ever met. Now BE QUIET." He snaps his fingers and the Maniac's mouth is covered with magic duct tape. Now, normal duct tape would normally suffice, but the shopkeep is feeling spiteful, so every time the Maniac pulls off the duct tape to begin screaming again, he discovers that there's another, slightly more extensive placement of duct tape underneath that one. The Shopkeep flinches as he does this, having expended an action on it. By the time the Maniac reaches 300 or so his head is just totally wrapped in duct tape, but it's still not done yet. The exact number of layers of magical duct tape is 500, but this should keep the Maniac occupied for a while.
That done, the Shopkeep sends out mental energy to give his speech directly the minds of the residents of 13th avenue. It still plays out in their minds as if it were just the Shopkeep giving his speech directly from the pulpit, except they can still hear the Shopkeep's speech over the Maniac's screaming, unless they were far enough away that they wouldn't be able to hear it anyways. Why did the Shopkeep blow an action shutting the Maniac up if he didn't need to? Spite.
The Maniac wasn't defending against my position apparently, because the top response didn't load in for me properly.
On the other hand, I'm taking my soul back, and abdicating from my position in the running because you know what? This is STUPID. The bad kind of stupid. Every time I try to actually do something relevant to the actual game, JOE reminds me why I'm only here for the charges. First I get an item stolen from me out of the blue WHILE hijacking my character to make me look like an absolute donkey's arse, now THIS. I didn't spend half an hour typing up an actual, quality speech just for you to crap all over it AND THEN DO THE EXACT SAME THING THAT PISSED ME OFF LAST TIME. This isn't worth it, in the slightest.
I'm NOT a moron. STOP doing impromptu cutscenes designed specifically to say that I AM. If they were actually funny maybe I'd be okay with you hijacking my character like that, but they're not, and I'm not.
41.4/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
The shopkeep walks over to the Godmodder. "Here's a deal I'm going to make with you. While we may not be on the best terms, I think that you could be a valuable customer. If you wish to collaborate to make a machine capable of converting Godmodder energy into player actions and vice versa, I would be willing to put my other summonings on hold at the end of the current "stack" to collaborate on it with you. Additionally, if you agree to such a project, any future items that ostensibly belong to you that get... 'confiscated' by me for the purpose of furthering my charges will have their value added to your credit account as compensation."
After taking awhile to survey the place where I am, I ready my Sword and start exploring it. "well doesn't this look familiar."
(All weirdness in this image is a result of OOC technical difficulties which, sadly, will likely remain the case for the entirety of this sidequest. feel completely free to pretend it wasn't blurred, the sword looked like a sword, it said sword in normal letters,and the rats were actually looking at you.) You see there are several rats in front of you, including a king rat. you have no idea how it is different from a normal rat... regal aura of killyness, maybe, somehow? in the distance, you think you see an offshoot tunnel of some sort. Rat[Lv. 2] like 10 HP x2 King Rat [Lv. 6] around 30 hp
The shopkeep raises an eyebrow at the Godmodder, and takes a look over the cheesebread, just in case there's charge points hidden in it. He's learned from the incident with the dirt block. "Alright, I'm just going to point out that the only time I've ever actually cared about the well-being of... one of my summons? And that's because someone had already placed in an order for it. So while I invite you to blow a good 7 rounds killing a boss in one hit, I could point out that your time is better spent killing something that is actually hurting you. Alternatively, you could find something more productive to do with your time, instead of trying to do something that will get your credit account penalized for damages to my person. It'd be a real shame if you couldn't win yourself a boss from that game you've got with Algot because you were too busy spiting me." If the cheesebread doesn't have any charge value to it, the shopkeep shrugs and hands it over to the Godmodder.
The shopkeep then rounds on the Maniac. "You, my friend, are the worst psychopathic serial killer I have ever met. Now BE QUIET." He snaps his fingers and the Maniac's mouth is covered with magic duct tape. Now, normal duct tape would normally suffice, but the shopkeep is feeling spiteful, so every time the Maniac pulls off the duct tape to begin screaming again, he discovers that there's another, slightly more extensive placement of duct tape underneath that one. The Shopkeep flinches as he does this, having expended an action on it. By the time the Maniac reaches 300 or so his head is just totally wrapped in duct tape, but it's still not done yet. The exact number of layers of magical duct tape is 500, but this should keep the Maniac occupied for a while.
That done, the Shopkeep sends out mental energy to give his speech directly the minds of the residents of 13th avenue. It still plays out in their minds as if it were just the Shopkeep giving his speech directly from the pulpit, except they can still hear the Shopkeep's speech over the Maniac's screaming, unless they were far enough away that they wouldn't be able to hear it anyways. Why did the Shopkeep blow an action shutting the Maniac up if he didn't need to? Spite.
The Maniac wasn't defending against my position apparently, because the top response didn't load in for me properly.
On the other hand, I'm taking my soul back, and abdicating from my position in the running because you know what? This is STUPID. The bad kind of stupid. Every time I try to actually do something relevant to the actual game, JOE reminds me why I'm only here for the charges. First I get an item stolen from me out of the blue WHILE hijacking my character to make me look like an absolute donkey's arse, now THIS. I didn't spend half an hour typing up an actual, quality speech just for you to crap all over it AND THEN DO THE EXACT SAME THING THAT PISSED ME OFF LAST TIME. This isn't worth it, in the slightest.
I'm NOT a moron. STOP doing impromptu cutscenes designed specifically to say that I AM. If they were actually funny maybe I'd be okay with you hijacking my character like that, but they're not, and I'm not.
41.4/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
The shopkeep walks over to the Godmodder. "Here's a deal I'm going to make with you. While we may not be on the best terms, I think that you could be a valuable customer. If you wish to collaborate to make a machine capable of converting Godmodder energy into player actions and vice versa, I would be willing to put my other summonings on hold at the end of the current "stack" to collaborate on it with you. Additionally, if you agree to such a project, any future items that ostensibly belong to you that get... 'confiscated' by me for the purpose of furthering my charges will have their value added to your credit account as compensation."
1] you observe jakes cheesebread does not contain any charge points. as such, you give it to the Godmodder, who quickly eats it. GODMODDER: Man does Jakes Cheesebread taste good! Thanks man, if you need a favor just ask, and if you happen to find any more of it GIMME. It would appear that Jakes Cheesebread is merely exceptionally good cheesebread, to the point that all non-players aware of its existence covet it. it does not, however, force players to try to obtain it, though a player who has previously eaten Jakes Cheesebread will receive repetitive reminders as to the quality should more become available. 2]
"Yes." the Maniac says."No." the shopkeeper says. "No." the Maniac says. "Yes." the shopkeeper says. "Hah! You said yes! Now you have to give me your soul!" the Maniac says. "Okay." the Maniac says.)
the 'shopkeeper says yes by accident' bit might count as hijacking your character but I think anyone would eventually slip up after long enough- probably longer then the length i included, but making a small book consisting only of "yes the maniac says. no the shopkeeper says" would be stupid. Anyway uh... right. if i recall correctly my plan was something along the lines of 'if he notices he never agreed and tries to get it back he gets it back', and my intended portrayal of the shopkeeper was more "sufficiently annoyed by the maniac that he started ignoring them"... I'm not sure whether it qualifies as noticing so... you get back 1 Schrodingers soul! this is half a soul, on average.
(...Also, overall the speech gave you stuff, and you did it as a free action. I mean, you spent no actions and now the voters like you more, you got some lore, you have an opportunity to gain more votes for sure if you want to, and you got Jakes Cheesebread. in exchange you lost your soul, but your soul regenerates over time at a rate of "10% whenever I remember to do that" and only affects things that I've yet to see you attempt.)
3] GODMODDER: you can just... skimp off on the health of a summon and ask me to give it a shield or something. nobody bothers healing their entities anyway.
[Note for context: this was written before reading discord message.]
The shopkeep shakes his head sadly. "I wish I could do that, but no, it's gotta be full strength on arrival to the battlefield otherwise it doesn't count towards fulfilling my contract."
45/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
It seems that NOBODY has enough credits stored up to claim the Terror Pants, so now there's just a giant mechanical pair of pants on the battlefield not doing anything. I might set it to hostile at some point, I dunno.
Anyways, Terror Pants stats: Attacks (when ordering the entity, the owner chooses which of the 5 go off. Attacks are the same strength no matter which ones go off, so most of the time you’ll just want to activate all of them.) Bulletstorm: all of the guns facing in every direction fire aimlessly, filling the entire battlefield with bullets. All entities on the field take light damage, but take more the larger their health pool is. spray and pray: all of the front facing guns are pointed in the general direction of the enemy, and fired. Deals moderate damage to all enemies, with a miss chance that grows higher the smaller the enemy’s health pool is. Machine guns: The plethora of semi-aimed machineguns open fire on the targeted entity, riddling them with lead. Enemy armor has triple strength, and dodge chance is multiplied by 50% (so 50% dodge chance becomes 75%, stuff like that) ROCKETS: fires lots and lots of explosive rockets at a target, dealing heavy damage to them, and lighter damage to two random enemies that were a little too close. The Big Gun: the biggest, central gun on the pants lines up a shot and fires, dealing very heavy damage to the singular enemy target. Passive: Trousers. They ARE pants after all, if any humanoids arrive that are big enough, they can wear these terrifying pants. Two phases, terror pants in first phase. Once they hit half health, they become the terror shorts, losing half their max health and halving the power of all attacks but The Big Gun, but at the same time giving the Terror Shorts a nice chunk of dodge.
0.4/50 for Monolithium Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
Aeisenberg scans the Shopkeep, and gets an enormous mass of gibberish, eldritch tongues, and then something that breaks the scanning function for a few seconds due to not being possible to display properly. Only one actual word seems to make it through the scanning properly: Shepokep
1.4/50 for Monolithium Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
You do that! On the topic of the sidequest, I've realized there's no way I'm finishing the map I was trying to make for it, so I'm going to use a pre-existing map which, for this purpose, is lower quality. as such, The sidequest will begin as soon as I decide on mechanics, as opposed to some time next year. (seriously, I was still working on the SCP-base-place and hadn't gotten through anything outside of it, and I was less then a quarter done with That.)
Flawless logic, My friendo. though technically you also had a snake which ate half that pile of scrap. dunno what it's good for, but it exists. probably?
The shopkeep shakes his head sadly. "I wish I could do that, but no, it's gotta be full strength on arrival to the battlefield otherwise it doesn't count towards fulfilling my contract."
45/45 for The Wrong Trousers. Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits. Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
It seems that NOBODY has enough credits stored up to claim the Terror Pants, so now there's just a giant mechanical pair of pants on the battlefield not doing anything. I might set it to hostile at some point, I dunno.
Anyways, Terror Pants stats: Attacks (when ordering the entity, the owner chooses which of the 5 go off. Attacks are the same strength no matter which ones go off, so most of the time you’ll just want to activate all of them.) Bulletstorm: all of the guns facing in every direction fire aimlessly, filling the entire battlefield with bullets. All entities on the field take light damage, but take more the larger their health pool is. spray and pray: all of the front facing guns are pointed in the general direction of the enemy, and fired. Deals moderate damage to all enemies, with a miss chance that grows higher the smaller the enemy’s health pool is. Machine guns: The plethora of semi-aimed machineguns open fire on the targeted entity, riddling them with lead. Enemy armor has triple strength, and dodge chance is multiplied by 50% (so 50% dodge chance becomes 75%, stuff like that) ROCKETS: fires lots and lots of explosive rockets at a target, dealing heavy damage to them, and lighter damage to two random enemies that were a little too close. The Big Gun: the biggest, central gun on the pants lines up a shot and fires, dealing very heavy damage to the singular enemy target. Passive: Trousers. They ARE pants after all, if any humanoids arrive that are big enough, they can wear these terrifying pants. Two phases, terror pants in first phase. Once they hit half health, they become the terror shorts, losing half their max health and halving the power of all attacks but The Big Gun, but at the same time giving the Terror Shorts a nice chunk of dodge.
0.4/50 for Monolithium Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
450 baseHP. however, half of HP counts an additional 33% more. so, 380 HP (is only 7 off in statistical effeciancy). 90 A to split among things. the first third is do(logicing)es second half 67.5 and first 135. bulletstorm (is indiscriminate, 20cost treating as 60A) <50 = 5, <100=10 <200= 20, 35 beyond 200.) S&P: 33A (<50 = 75%dg, <100=66% <200=40%, 20 beyond 200, Avg pr'lly 40%, 25 Cost) MG: lets say... 30A counting as 20. R: 28 cost- 20A to main target, 6 to sub-targets. TBG: 42 cost, does 65 damage after lining up. (lower damage due to remaining full-strength post-shortening)
There we go. I'm not sure what'll happen if someone wears them. something amazing, I'm sure. Note that the large guy wearing them has to be of a decently high power, not a 5-charge or whatever. GODMODDER: Well... I won't stand against you on it, but I'm probably not going to help you. hard enough to punch things while wearing multiple layers of gloves without inventing science on the side.
(OOC: I'm going to side with Piono on this, it does kind of feel like you're cutting off their options.)
At the remark of "No one heals their entities, anyway," I cast Healing word on Cuphead.
"Cuphead, thank for all the help." The healing part is on the word "Thank".
I also use an idea I've sat on for a while, I scan the shopkeep. Not that I distrust them, I'm throwing my lot in with them, I'm just curious.
(OOC: to the extent that it occurs, it is not intentional. also, your action made me laugh again, so congratulations.) Thank. thank. Thank! thank! thank. Thank. Th4nk. thank, thank,thank. THANK. ...... +27 HP, overhealing at 1/4 efficiancy.
Aeisenberg scans the Shopkeep, and gets an enormous mass of gibberish, eldritch tongues, and then something that breaks the scanning function for a few seconds due to not being possible to display properly. Only one actual word seems to make it through the scanning properly: Shepokep
1.4/50 for Monolithium Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
ERR. Only 4 po- er, only 2 pos- gah, messed it up twice. only 3 psots per round. You know, I don't think that word actually made it through properly. unless he's secretly a derp sheep who controls or metaphysically is kelp. immediately after this, a translucent screen of sorts appears in the bottom-left of the shepokep's vision. beneath said translucent screen appears another line of text. Bounty: 18 so that... happens
the ground under the papers explodes due to being made of azidozide azide witch is a material that explodes if basically anything at all happens to it
BOOM! though you've got to wonder... how did the ground remain intact until now? also, there is a slight chance azidoazide azide is illegal, so it takes slightly less damage.
First of all, Shepokep drops out of the election! we're back to just SS and the Maniac, and the maniacs in the lead! on the other hand, Aeisenberg and Algot now have a vote again, so they could change the tide... Then, the Terror Pants... don't do any of their many-target attacks, because cuphead has counter. so, not bulletstorm or rockets. or spray and pray, since everything qualifies as an enemy for the pants right now. and the big gun needs aiming. so all that's left is the machine gun. the pants aim their machine gun at the paper, because how better to instigate terror then destroying DEMOCRAACCCCCYYYYYYYYYYYY? despite machine guns being illegal, they still do 15 damage, leaving the paper invalid as a ballot and the maniac tied with Several Shovels. the big gun takes aim on... enie, menie, minie, moe, catch a tiger by its toe, if you don't let it go, enie, menie, minie, moe... the tarasque box! Cuphead proceeds to use Spread on the maniac, the hand, andddd the terror pants. the terror pants, being the entirely sane and robotic entity that it is (just ignore the 'trousers' passive and they're sane i promise :P ), take 20 damage. the hand, though it has wacky HP, still dies. "Wait, how the hell is this thing dead!? I was going to glue it to my stub! Gom, I thought I told you to watch over it!!" the Maniac yells, flailing his knife-hand around. GODMODDER: you definitely did not tell me to watch over it. "But BECCAAIII, it was IMPLIED, Gosh." The maniac proceeds to "accidentally" block the 'spread' projectile with his knife before suddenly turning around and walking towards... random.org... the Shepokep. I think he either wants to die, is completely oblivious to Shepokep's distaste for him, or is trying to take advantage of the contract punishing non-building. probably the middle one. I don't think he's smart enough for the last one and he hasn't committed suicide yet. anyway, completely oblivious to the distaste the shepokep possesses for him, he enters the store and starts eating all over the stall. is it a store? is it a stall? I don't know. maybe it's both. After being completely insensitive, rude, and annoying, he turns to the shopkeeper and in his signature raspy, unpleasant voice, greets him and gives the shepokep the special premium selection of covenants. Obviously, anyone who isn't aligned with the Godmodder doesn't get to make normal deals with the maniac, if you would have even wanted to. which you probably don't either way. maybe the Godmodder doesn't get to do it either. I don't know. I wasn't there. all I saw was him mumbling about vintage rocks and then all of a sudden the maniac was here. and there was a script to follow. anyway, he offers you the , in exchange for you owing him a soul, or the , in exchange for you needing to decode it and understand it first. luckily, it's not in -5pt font, unlike the , or in... i think the is in korean? it might be Japanese though. I don't understand languages written in -5pt font, they're almost always invisible. anyway, the is in -5pt korean/japanese/something font,and costs 1 soul.It is of unknown value.The , on the other hand, is written in some weird language, but as long as you understand it, is free. it is believed to be worth an air strike (decoding the is a free action.). These are all the covenants he has, actually. not much of a premium selection with two items. what did the shepokep even do to get the selection? probably nothing. maybe the maniac just thinks since their scan is eldrich, he should try to get their soul. maybe the maniac is just insane. maybe the maniac rules hell. maybe i'm a flying electric robot cyborg plant-dinosaur-dragon with a gun. probably not that last one. or the one before that. The maniac doesn't seem to be paying much attention... maybe someone else could impersonate the shepokep, or sneak up behind him for a killy-killy attack-stab-fite? The paper is depressed at the lack of DEMOCRACY, what with it being almost dead. it exists, being depressed, at 2 hp. The Godmodder does... something. find the something to reverse it, if you want to!
.
[A]Mayoral Competition.
Candidates
Maniac:1 Votes - Vote for him if you want to get a Stand! Yes, the one from that one game. or comic book. or was it an anime? the thing where when people say something is a stand, they don't mean an amusement park thing. He's giving off free Stands. It's probably a scam. It's actually just a lemonade stand, most likely. Maybe you don't want him to become the president, because even if throwing lemonade stands at people is cool and all, this fight will probably be ten times harder. Then again, it's might just be rigged in his favor anyway.
hey everyone, it's... *Squints* Surplus Shovels: 1 Votes- Vote for him if you like Reptilians! Who doesn't? They control Earth anyway, not like it makes a huge difference, just sorta... makes it more official. But who doesn't like Reptilians, right? I heard he's part of the illuminati, but that means he doesn't think he is, so be cool, ok?
"You're Name.": 2 Votes- in his own words, "all disposable income of the mayoral district will be spent on hopping up the charge stack on steroids instead of on ruining the battlefield in a decidedly Aiding-Godmodder fashion. However, to the actual citizens, you need not worry about being forgotten like the other candidates promise to, the shopkeep has keen business skills and will keep the economy running smoothly. A vote for shopkeep is a vote for true neutrality.". Vote for him if you want things to go up to 11. in what department...? shenanigans probably. Dropped out!
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP4/4 [AG-Shard II]Eishalon II - Manifest OfFollyDEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is.. [A] Cuphead 88/88 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 3/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope. [A] Terror Pants 360/380 HP (Bulletstorm, Spray and pray, machine gun, rockets, The big gun. "Ownerless" [OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 159/200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 7/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero. 5% Seeded(DoT) (Stasis) [OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema [AG]PAPER. also known as: multiple thin sheaf of wood upon which people can write 2/128 HP Depressed due to lack of DEMOCRAAACCCCYYYYY. [AG]"The" Maniac 8/13 HP. knife on stump, gash on chest. offering . [AQ] Tarasque portal (0% clogged) Tarasque Hoard (213) Trapped in diamond box. targetted by the BIG GUN.
Piono: 0+0.5 Souls Eishaic Scythe, Starflesh Staff, 1 jakes cheesebread Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff)100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan) Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed. Goldhello: lite injruy. Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10 ). 8 Soul points. GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13mrald-goop,zombie mage corpse Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G]Eishalon Mask [D]Eishalon mask [F]
The Shopkeep ignores the popup in his vision, dismissing it with a wave of his hand, then punches the Maniac in the nose, sending the Maniac flying away from the stall at high speeds, but unfortunately due to lack of an applied action, doesn't deal any damage.
"I can't sign your contracts anyways you moron, I don't have a soul, never had one in the first place. I have something else, and it's something I'm not giving away, even if it were usable by something like you." The Shopkeep then notices that he's still got more Jake's Cheesebread in his inventory. If he still has Jakes Cheesebread available, he says the Godmodder can have it in exchange for help on the Godmodder to player action converter. If not, so I express my disappointment with a frowning emoji. :(
1.4/50 for Monolithium Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
Err: The Godmodder immunized the hoard against shadiamond! that is obvious, since they exist at all.
mayoral voting is a free action. you have given your vote to [Shopkeeper]
ychluglefnkurbigwoy!
"you were already doing that. That's like if James said he was running for mayor and if he was elected, he would wear only a cheesebread box. he was already doing that. you were already doing that. you are bread. I am pineapples. the mayoral position is cheese. I am meant for them, and your defeat will elevate me. when people see me upon the position, and you crushed below me, they will immediately think "Жил был король когда-то, При нем блоха жила"- it stinks. but then, they will look again, and see that "Ya idu kuda sam tsar' idet peshkom." (it stinks). but then the truly wise of pravdan metro moschow will buy the movie rights for fifthbean killion boomals. This, I know from nothing! what, I'm going, to do?"
"Kill Yo-"
"BLARGLARGLEBLUHAAAAAAAAAAAAANot Again! no! No Foliage! AAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
An airship flys overhead, and out falls a red sphere. then, meters from the Tree-ent, it explodes. the Tree"ent" dies. the Maniac, strangely enough, is unharmed.
Cuphead uses chaser. he now has auto-attack respondy thing for 2 rounds.
The LOG gasps. its bodyguards! it quickly tosses its vote in for the Maniac. then it starts trying to make a Arbor elemental to provide another vote.
The maniac makes a big speech, having calmed his nerves.
"Hello, everyone. citizens of 13th Avenue! dust hive bees of 121st house! Jake from pizza hut! ("Thanks for the compliment. I'd vote for you, but it's called cheesebread. get it right. it's cheese. and bread. cheese on bread. cheesebread. i don't understand why people keep forgetting this. )"
"AHAIM. I always keep 10 mousetraps in my pants. It's more painful than you can ever imagine, but it's worth it. You know how much shit can be done with a mouse trap? Yeah. A lot of shit. I know there are better ways to do all those things, and if I'm mayor of 13th avenue, I might just do them. but I do things unreasonably! you heard me! If I really was the kind of guy to go for the most reasonable approach, all of you would probably be dead right now. Isn't that nice, huh? Imagine if there was a version of me like that. Haha. He'd be unstoppable! Fortunately, he doesn't exist. you want to know what I'll bring to the office when I get elected? Well, I won't have an office. if you want to find me, I'll wander the streets killing people. I will stab your hated enemies between the eyes...
WITH THIS KNIFE! (he waves his knife-hand in the air)
"What a charming guy." "He's like me, I wanna stab people in the eyes" "I think that he makes sense, he should be president."
when everyone inferior to me is dead, I will set up my office. in it, I will stand. that is, I am a lemonade stand. and I will resume my destiny, having lemonade on my back. and I will give everyone else a stand. the one from some ridiculous adventure. I swear, it is not a scam. i will not give you my limbs and declare them lemonade stands. because that WOULD BETRAY THE TRUST OF THE PEOPLE! I will be upfront and I WILL NOT BACK DOWN until every tree is conquered, every bush is burned, every shrub cooking into sweet, sweet rabbit stew... MINUS THE RABBIT! and that is not all, my dear citizens, no it is not! if someone tries to kill me, no matter who it is, I will survive! because I can't be hurt by entities. I can't be hurt by lots of things, actually, but entities are one of them! you know, I really wish I was a fire-eater!
"wow, cool!" "I wish I had fire-eating skills too!" "we should vote for him!"
And you know why I wish it? it's not just novelty, or cordialty, or anylty! no ,it's because If I had a penny every time I've heard someone blame their mistakes on some supernatural force, I'd almost have enough to start my own cult based around that! Well, I would if I hadn't already done it. which I did. I'm awesome that way!
In Collusion, vote maniac 2013."
That was. something. The Godmodder spends his action on something maniac-related. maybe the part where he ends every set of murmers with 'should vote for maniac'. or maybe something else. I don't know. by the way, you can't vote for yourself, so instead the maniac votes for some random guy who's never going to win... uh... what was his name again... oh right, jakefromcheesebreadhouse91224.
[A] Mayoral Competition.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP 4/4
[AG-Shard II] Eishalon II - Manifest Of Folly DEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is..
[A] Cuphead 78/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 1/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope. 20A counter for 2!
[OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 159/
200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 7/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero. 5% Seeded(DoT) (Stasis)[OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema
[AG] LOG. also known as: Ent. 88/128 HP
[AG] Tree"Ent" Air strike'D!
[AG] "The" Maniac 8/13 HP. arm stump, gash on chest.
[AG-Maniac] Hand 20/20 HP, on maniac shoulder.
[AQ] Tarasque portal (0% clogged)
Tarasque Hoard (~410)
Piono: 95% shadiamond (invis) Eishaic Scythe, Starflesh Staff
Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff) seriously injured. 100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan)
Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed.
Goldhello: lite injruy.
Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10
GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13
Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G] Eishalon Mask [D] Eishalon mask [F]
The shopkeep stands up and goes to the speech stand.
"Ahem, fellow people, voters and Jake from Cheesebread Hut, I am announcing my candidacy as a valid member of society, and as someone who is not just a minion of the Godmodder, and thus doomed to the eventual death that all entities summoned by the Godmodder suffer eventually. The Maniac promises to be stalking the streets, stabbing your enemies in between the eyes, but how can he do that when he spends all of his time stabbing his OWN enemies in between the eyes, up until the point where his own enemies plant a dagger of their own in between his? It's a promise he has no intention of keeping, even if he had the capacity to! His entire foundation is built upon deception, as despite his claims that he cannot be hurt by many things, he also CAN be hurt by many things. Just in the past few rounds he's been hurt enough to reduce him to almost half of his initial health! And you don't want to vote for someone who dies easily, do you? It just means you'll have to listen to these stupid election speeches all over again! I'm even harder to kill than the Maniac, and, even better, I come back to life after dying due to being in a complicated meta-state of not-actually-aliveness that renders me unable to actually be killed.
Not to mention, the Maniac is attempting to undermine the entire democratic process. He voted for someone who isn't even running for mayor/presidenthood! A man like that cannot be trusted with office.
But enough about the Maniac, I'm here to state my position. I have money, lots of money, and I know how to use it. I will bring great wealth to this town such that you won't need to wait for the maniac's semi-random antics to bring death to your hated enemies, but you will instead have enough money to be able to hire a hitman to do it exactly when you WANT them killed.
Not only that, but I possess the capacity to put a lemonade stand on every corner, and an actual stand in the hands of those who want them. But I will hear the voice of the people, the Maniac wants to silence it. After all, how can you lovely folks voice your opinions if the Maniac's already killed you all?
In short, my wonderful crowd, I urge you to vote for me. A vote for me is a vote for neutral, and aren't the neutral alignments the best ones anyways? None of the strict rules nonsense of good, and none of the requirements to drown kittens and kick puppies of evil, you are, in essence, free to do as you please! So vote for me, vote for neutrality, and vote for the future of 13th avenue."
I then vote for the Several Shovels, to counterspite the maniac for spelling You're Name wrong
35.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
potential SCP credits: 8(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
It was supposed to cover to cover the ground in diamonds and thus surround them so they get stuck in a block of diamonds anyways I ad a charge to the reward
Thank you kindly Algot.
Uh... where was I with the snake catching snake, I forget.
38.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
potential SCP credits: 10(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
I turn the LOG. also known as: Ent. into paper
A small apologetic note arrives in the godmodders hands. "Apologies for running against your entity. It's nothing against you. It is mostly business driven, and partly driven by the fact that your maniac is unbearably obnoxious."
39.2/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
potential SCP credits: 10(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
Response to speech placed within speech for simplicity. colors other then shopkeeper color are not shopkeeper.
Several Shovels voted for! you have recieved:
somewhat increased voter popularity
opportunity to bribe a voter
1 Jakes Cheesebread
information about job distribution (1/6 people: assassins)
You have lost: 1 Soul. you now have 0 souls.
The Maniac has gained: 1 Soul. The maniac now has ?
?? +1 SoulsThe maniac has lost : Voter popularity.
Time
oh. the Tarasque are now stucl. How will they get to the voting booths like this?!
[REDACTED], to be shown next pasta.
ohmergawd. u ares nao fite PAPER. also known as: multiple thin sheaf of wood upon which people can write
Godmodder: Don't I know it. he's effective, though.
you have successfully passed the test: Patiensssssse- do not roleplay -interfere in any way with your snake go-getter for the round during which it is completing its mission. reward: +1.2 Charge or Snake Removal Item Tier 1
you vote shopkeeper. random note, votes are not set in stone until the election, and you can change your vote if you change your mind.
You attack the maniac. man are you good at causing
noun
noun: attack; plural noun: attacks
an instance of fierce public criticism or opposition.
! The maniac doesn't even argue against you, instead- "AAAAAAAAAAAI'M GREAT I'M GREAT I'M GREAT VOTE FOR ME I'M GREAT I'M GREAT VOTE FOR ME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA INSANITY IS THE BEST ESPECIALLY WHEN I HAVE IT BECAUSE I'M GREAT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" JUST SHOUTING REAlly lOUD, SO... wait a second! nobody can hear you! Darn it, and those were some Amazing arguments, too! If only people had been able to hear you over the maniacs yelling, but they couldn't... I'm sure everyone would agree that the shopkeeper is better then the maniac, if only they heard you.
Congratulations! by the power of completely ignoring the searing pain of multiple large, bleeding wounds for several rounds, you manage to heal back from critically wounded! this will only work once. you are still a solid diamond statue.
Cuphead takes on the Ent. Wait, what ent? All we have is some PAPER. cuphead takes on the paper. the paper offers him an ETERNAL COVENANT. Cupheads worst experiences have been about contracts, especially ones he didn't read beforehand, so he refuses the covenant, which is written in -5pt font and some strange mix of hebrew, sanscrit, korean, and scribbles. instead, he shoots it. however, it survives, and becomes a voting sheet which responds to will, and goes over to the tarasque. as long as the PAPER is alive, the maniac gets an additional vote per 11 HP it possesses. also, it is protected by the sacred powers of DEMOCRACY, so find a way around those.
The Maniac takes the opportunity to throw his hand at cuphead, clutching a knife. it swipes twice midflight, and misses both times, but for some reason only takes 15 damage instead of 20. maybe so the maniac won't have to go get his knife again.
The Godmodder looks at the mayoral competition... well, it's going ok. he'll step in if it looks like the maniac'll lose. Wait. is that... Cheesebread? Jakes Cheesebread? He Will have the cheesebread, he explains to piono , while he breaks open the Tarasque box and throws them at cuphead like a machine gun. Jakes cheesebread is a thing he wants.the Tarasque impact cuphead for ~10 damage, and all of them explode. except 3, that is, which stay to vote. the godmodder goes on to explain that if he does not get the Cheesebread, he will start a charge to kill Pionos next summon which doesn't get an owner.
.
[A] Mayoral Competition.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP 4/4
[AG-Shard II] Eishalon II - Manifest Of Folly DEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is..
[A] Cuphead 69/85 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 2/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope. 20A counter for 1!
[OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 159/
200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 7/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero. 5% Seeded(DoT) (Stasis)[OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema
[AG] PAPER. also known as: multiple thin sheaf of wood upon which people can write 33/128 HP will-based voting, protected by DEMOCRACY.
[AG] "The" Maniac 8/13 HP. arm stump, gash on chest. +1 Soul
[AG-Maniac] Hand 5/20 HP, on maniac shoulder. nife.
[AQ] Tarasque portal (0% clogged)
Tarasque Hoard (3) Trapped in diamond box
Piono: 0 Souls Eishaic Scythe, Starflesh Staff, 1 jakes cheesebread
Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff)100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan)
Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed.
Goldhello: lite injruy.
Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10
GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13
Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G] Eishalon Mask [D] Eishalon mask [F]
After taking awhile to survey the place where I am, I ready my Sword and start exploring it. "well doesn't this look familiar."
I came here to fight godmodders and chew bubblegum, and I'm all out of bubblegum
The shopkeep raises an eyebrow at the Godmodder, and takes a look over the cheesebread, just in case there's charge points hidden in it. He's learned from the incident with the dirt block. "Alright, I'm just going to point out that the only time I've ever actually cared about the well-being of... one of my summons? And that's because someone had already placed in an order for it. So while I invite you to blow a good 7 rounds killing a boss in one hit, I could point out that your time is better spent killing something that is actually hurting you. Alternatively, you could find something more productive to do with your time, instead of trying to do something that will get your credit account penalized for damages to my person. It'd be a real shame if you couldn't win yourself a boss from that game you've got with Algot because you were too busy spiting me." If the cheesebread doesn't have any charge value to it, the shopkeep shrugs and hands it over to the Godmodder.
The shopkeep then rounds on the Maniac. "You, my friend, are the worst psychopathic serial killer I have ever met. Now BE QUIET." He snaps his fingers and the Maniac's mouth is covered with magic duct tape. Now, normal duct tape would normally suffice, but the shopkeep is feeling spiteful, so every time the Maniac pulls off the duct tape to begin screaming again, he discovers that there's another, slightly more extensive placement of duct tape underneath that one. The Shopkeep flinches as he does this, having expended an action on it. By the time the Maniac reaches 300 or so his head is just totally wrapped in duct tape, but it's still not done yet. The exact number of layers of magical duct tape is 500, but this should keep the Maniac occupied for a while.That done, the Shopkeep sends out mental energy to give his speech directly the minds of the residents of 13th avenue. It still plays out in their minds as if it were just the Shopkeep giving his speech directly from the pulpit, except they can still hear the Shopkeep's speech over the Maniac's screaming, unless they were far enough away that they wouldn't be able to hear it anyways.Why did the Shopkeep blow an action shutting the Maniac up if he didn't need to? Spite.The Maniac wasn't defending against my position apparently, because the top response didn't load in for me properly.
On the other hand, I'm taking my soul back, and abdicating from my position in the running because you know what? This is STUPID. The bad kind of stupid. Every time I try to actually do something relevant to the actual game, JOE reminds me why I'm only here for the charges. First I get an item stolen from me out of the blue WHILE hijacking my character to make me look like an absolute donkey's arse, now THIS. I didn't spend half an hour typing up an actual, quality speech just for you to crap all over it AND THEN DO THE EXACT SAME THING THAT PISSED ME OFF LAST TIME. This isn't worth it, in the slightest.
I'm NOT a moron. STOP doing impromptu cutscenes designed specifically to say that I AM. If they were actually funny maybe I'd be okay with you hijacking my character like that, but they're not, and I'm not.
41.4/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
potential SCP credits: 10(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
The shopkeep walks over to the Godmodder. "Here's a deal I'm going to make with you. While we may not be on the best terms, I think that you could be a valuable customer. If you wish to collaborate to make a machine capable of converting Godmodder energy into player actions and vice versa, I would be willing to put my other summonings on hold at the end of the current "stack" to collaborate on it with you. Additionally, if you agree to such a project, any future items that ostensibly belong to you that get... 'confiscated' by me for the purpose of furthering my charges will have their value added to your credit account as compensation."
I ad to the reward
The Shopkeep reaches in and pulls out the snakes as they're teleported out, only to realize he now has a half eaten pile of scrap and no entity.
So to compensate I'm summoning a giant robotic pair of pants.
44.4/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
potential SCP credits: 12(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
(All weirdness in this image is a result of OOC technical difficulties which, sadly, will likely remain the case for the entirety of this sidequest. feel completely free to pretend it wasn't blurred, the sword looked like a sword, it said sword in normal letters,and the rats were actually looking at you.)
You see there are several rats in front of you, including a king rat. you have no idea how it is different from a normal rat... regal aura of killyness, maybe, somehow?
in the distance, you think you see an offshoot tunnel of some sort.
Rat [Lv. 2] like 10 HP x2
King Rat [Lv. 6] around 30 hp
1] you observe jakes cheesebread does not contain any charge points. as such, you give it to the Godmodder, who quickly eats it.
GODMODDER: Man does Jakes Cheesebread taste good! Thanks man, if you need a favor just ask, and if you happen to find any more of it GIMME.
It would appear that Jakes Cheesebread is merely exceptionally good cheesebread, to the point that all non-players aware of its existence covet it. it does not, however, force players to try to obtain it, though a player who has previously eaten Jakes Cheesebread will receive repetitive reminders as to the quality should more become available.
2]
the 'shopkeeper says yes by accident' bit might count as hijacking your character but I think anyone would eventually slip up after long enough- probably longer then the length i included, but making a small book consisting only of "yes the maniac says. no the shopkeeper says" would be stupid.
Anyway uh... right. if i recall correctly my plan was something along the lines of 'if he notices he never agreed and tries to get it back he gets it back', and my intended portrayal of the shopkeeper was more "sufficiently annoyed by the maniac that he started ignoring them"... I'm not sure whether it qualifies as noticing so... you get back 1 Schrodingers soul! this is half a soul, on average.
(...Also, overall the speech gave you stuff, and you did it as a free action. I mean, you spent no actions and now the voters like you more, you got some lore, you have an opportunity to gain more votes for sure if you want to, and you got Jakes Cheesebread. in exchange you lost your soul, but your soul regenerates over time at a rate of "10% whenever I remember to do that" and only affects things that I've yet to see you attempt.)
3] GODMODDER: you can just... skimp off on the health of a summon and ask me to give it a shield or something. nobody bothers healing their entities anyway.
[Note for context: this was written before reading discord message.]
The shopkeep shakes his head sadly. "I wish I could do that, but no, it's gotta be full strength on arrival to the battlefield otherwise it doesn't count towards fulfilling my contract."
45/45 for The Wrong Trousers.
Lowest acceptable price: 4.5 credits.
Highest you might be charged: 22.5 credits.
It seems that NOBODY has enough credits stored up to claim the Terror Pants, so now there's just a giant mechanical pair of pants on the battlefield not doing anything. I might set it to hostile at some point, I dunno.
Anyways, Terror Pants stats:
Attacks (when ordering the entity, the owner chooses which of the 5 go off. Attacks are the same strength no matter which ones go off, so most of the time you’ll just want to activate all of them.)
Bulletstorm: all of the guns facing in every direction fire aimlessly, filling the entire battlefield with bullets. All entities on the field take light damage, but take more the larger their health pool is.
spray and pray: all of the front facing guns are pointed in the general direction of the enemy, and fired. Deals moderate damage to all enemies, with a miss chance that grows higher the smaller the enemy’s health pool is.
Machine guns: The plethora of semi-aimed machineguns open fire on the targeted entity, riddling them with lead. Enemy armor has triple strength, and dodge chance is multiplied by 50% (so 50% dodge chance becomes 75%, stuff like that)
ROCKETS: fires lots and lots of explosive rockets at a target, dealing heavy damage to them, and lighter damage to two random enemies that were a little too close.
The Big Gun: the biggest, central gun on the pants lines up a shot and fires, dealing very heavy damage to the singular enemy target.
Passive: Trousers. They ARE pants after all, if any humanoids arrive that are big enough, they can wear these terrifying pants.
Two phases, terror pants in first phase. Once they hit half health, they become the terror shorts, losing half their max health and halving the power of all attacks but The Big Gun, but at the same time giving the Terror Shorts a nice chunk of dodge.
0.4/50 for Monolithium
Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits
Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
potential SCP credits: 12(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
Terror Pants: 22.5 credits
Aeisenberg scans the Shopkeep, and gets an enormous mass of gibberish, eldritch tongues, and then something that breaks the scanning function for a few seconds due to not being possible to display properly.
Only one actual word seems to make it through the scanning properly:
Shepokep
1.4/50 for Monolithium
Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits
Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
potential SCP credits: 12(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
Terror Pants: 22.5 credits
the ground under the papers explodes due to being made of azidozide azide witch is a material that explodes if basically anything at all happens to it
You do that! On the topic of the sidequest, I've realized there's no way I'm finishing the map I was trying to make for it, so I'm going to use a pre-existing map which, for this purpose, is lower quality. as such, The sidequest will begin as soon as I decide on mechanics, as opposed to some time next year. (seriously, I was still working on the SCP-base-place and hadn't gotten through anything outside of it, and I was less then a quarter done with That.)
Flawless logic, My friendo. though technically you also had a snake which ate half that pile of scrap. dunno what it's good for, but it exists. probably?
Generating Stats. . .
90 A to split among things. the first third is do(logicing)es second half 67.5 and first 135.
bulletstorm (is indiscriminate, 20cost treating as 60A) <50 = 5, <100=10 <200= 20, 35 beyond 200.)
S&P: 33A (<50 = 75%dg, <100=66% <200=40%, 20 beyond 200, Avg pr'lly 40%, 25 Cost)
MG: lets say... 30A counting as 20.
R: 28 cost- 20A to main target, 6 to sub-targets.
TBG: 42 cost, does 65 damage after lining up. (lower damage due to remaining full-strength post-shortening)
There we go. I'm not sure what'll happen if someone wears them. something amazing, I'm sure. Note that the large guy wearing them has to be of a decently high power, not a 5-charge or whatever.
GODMODDER: Well... I won't stand against you on it, but I'm probably not going to help you. hard enough to punch things while wearing multiple layers of gloves without inventing science on the side.
(OOC: to the extent that it occurs, it is not intentional. also, your action made me laugh again, so congratulations.)
Thank.
thank. Thank!
thank!
thank.
Thank.
Th4nk.
thank,
thank,thank.
THANK.
......
+27 HP, overhealing at 1/4 efficiancy.
ERR. Only 4 po- er, only 2 pos- gah, messed it up twice. only 3 psots per round.


You know, I don't think that word actually made it through properly. unless he's secretly a derp sheep who controls or metaphysically is kelp.
immediately after this, a translucent screen of sorts appears in the bottom-left of the shepokep's vision.
beneath said translucent screen appears another line of text.
Bounty: 18
so that... happens
BOOM! though you've got to wonder... how did the ground remain intact until now? also, there is a slight chance azidoazide azide is illegal, so it takes slightly less damage.
, in exchange for you owing him a soul, or the
, in exchange for you needing to decode it and understand it first. luckily, it's not in -5pt font, unlike the
, or in... i think the
is in korean? it might be Japanese though. I don't understand languages written in -5pt font, they're almost always invisible. anyway, the
is in -5pt korean/japanese/something font,and costs 1 soul.It is of unknown value.The
, on the other hand, is written in some weird language, but as long as you understand it, is free. it is believed to be worth an air strike (decoding the
is a free action.).
First of all, Shepokep drops out of the election! we're back to just SS and the Maniac, and the maniacs in the lead! on the other hand, Aeisenberg and Algot now have a vote again, so they could change the tide...
Then, the Terror Pants... don't do any of their many-target attacks, because cuphead has counter. so, not bulletstorm or rockets. or spray and pray, since everything qualifies as an enemy for the pants right now. and the big gun needs aiming. so all that's left is the machine gun. the pants aim their machine gun at the paper, because how better to instigate terror then destroying DEMOCRAACCCCCYYYYYYYYYYYY? despite machine guns being illegal, they still do 15 damage, leaving the paper invalid as a ballot and the maniac tied with Several Shovels. the big gun takes aim on... enie, menie, minie, moe, catch a tiger by its toe, if you don't let it go, enie, menie, minie, moe... the tarasque box!
Cuphead proceeds to use Spread on the maniac, the hand, andddd the terror pants. the terror pants, being the entirely sane and robotic entity that it is (just ignore the 'trousers' passive and they're sane i promise :P ), take 20 damage. the hand, though it has wacky HP, still dies.
"Wait, how the hell is this thing dead!? I was going to glue it to my stub! Gom, I thought I told you to watch over it!!" the Maniac yells, flailing his knife-hand around.
GODMODDER: you definitely did not tell me to watch over it. "But BECCAAIII, it was IMPLIED, Gosh." The maniac proceeds to "accidentally" block the 'spread' projectile with his knife before suddenly turning around and walking towards... random.org... the Shepokep. I think he either wants to die, is completely oblivious to Shepokep's distaste for him, or is trying to take advantage of the contract punishing non-building. probably the middle one. I don't think he's smart enough for the last one and he hasn't committed suicide yet. anyway, completely oblivious to the distaste the shepokep possesses for him, he enters the store and starts eating all over the stall. is it a store? is it a stall? I don't know. maybe it's both.
After being completely insensitive, rude, and annoying, he turns to the shopkeeper and in his signature raspy, unpleasant voice, greets him and gives the shepokep the special premium selection of covenants. Obviously, anyone who isn't aligned with the Godmodder doesn't get to make normal deals with the maniac, if you would have even wanted to. which you probably don't either way. maybe the Godmodder doesn't get to do it either. I don't know. I wasn't there. all I saw was him mumbling about vintage rocks and then all of a sudden the maniac was here. and there was a script to follow. anyway, he offers you the
These are all the covenants he has, actually. not much of a premium selection with two items. what did the shepokep even do to get the selection? probably nothing. maybe the maniac just thinks since their scan is eldrich, he should try to get their soul. maybe the maniac is just insane. maybe the maniac rules hell. maybe i'm a flying electric robot cyborg plant-dinosaur-dragon with a gun. probably not that last one. or the one before that.
The maniac doesn't seem to be paying much attention... maybe someone else could impersonate the shepokep, or sneak up behind him for a killy-killy attack-stab-fite?
The paper is depressed at the lack of DEMOCRACY, what with it being almost dead. it exists, being depressed, at 2 hp.
The Godmodder does... something. find the something to reverse it, if you want to!
.
[A] Mayoral Competition.
[GM] Godmodder: 284 /300 HP 4/4
.
[AG-Shard II] Eishalon II - Manifest Of Folly DEAD. as dead as I've heard 'disco' is..
[A] Cuphead 88/88 HP 75% dodge, [55Basic | 20Spread x3 | 50Chaser 20%Dneg ] 3/4 EX move 110, shadiamond proof! owned by aisenberg, bardic inspiration, temporal preservation, temporary hope.
[A] Terror Pants 360/380 HP (Bulletstorm, Spray and pray, machine gun, rockets, The big gun. "Ownerless"
[OG] Excalium Orbital Cannon 159/
200 HP Charge Gauge [IIIIIIII] 7/20, 35A (weak resistance to grounded attacks. portalshot ) owned by goldhero. 5% Seeded(DoT) (Stasis)[OG] faithful Dog 200/100HP -33 to incoming damage! Solid diamondnotLoyal to Aeisenberg Mastema
[AG] PAPER. also known as: multiple thin sheaf of wood upon which people can write 2/128 HP Depressed due to lack of DEMOCRAAACCCCYYYYY.
[AG] "The" Maniac 8/13 HP. knife on stump, gash on chest. offering
[AQ] Tarasque portal (0% clogged)
Tarasque Hoard (213) Trapped in diamond box. targetted by the BIG GUN.
Piono: 0+0.5 Souls Eishaic Scythe, Starflesh Staff, 1 jakes cheesebread
Aeisenberg: Flex tape rapier (minor attack buff)100% crystalized, Favour of the Deva, Coronal Relic (cyan)
Algot: 36% crystalized, glowing (noshadiamond). well fed.
Goldhello: lite injruy.
Acerac: dead (must make 1 post to return). Caaaaarl (.5 AP), tunnelbuild sidequest exists (10
GENE: slep. blackjack warrior. dulled voidshard (permanent) spider corpse, Warp organ, 13
Communal Inventory: Eishalon Mask [G] Eishalon Mask [D] Eishalon mask [F]
The Shopkeep ignores the popup in his vision, dismissing it with a wave of his hand, then punches the Maniac in the nose, sending the Maniac flying away from the stall at high speeds, but unfortunately due to lack of an applied action, doesn't deal any damage.
"I can't sign your contracts anyways you moron, I don't have a soul, never had one in the first place. I have something else, and it's something I'm not giving away, even if it were usable by something like you." The Shopkeep then notices that he's still got more Jake's Cheesebread in his inventory. If he still has Jakes Cheesebread available, he says the Godmodder can have it in exchange for help on the Godmodder to player action converter. If not, so I express my disappointment with a frowning emoji. :(
1.4/50 for Monolithium
Lowest acceptable price: 5 credits
Highest you might be charged: 25 credits
potential SCP credits: 12(?)
Credits:
Algot: 3
GENE: 1 (afk)
Redrover: 1 (afk)
Wooby: .8
Store:
Eishaic Scythe: 5 credits
Starflesh Staff: 4 credits
Terror Pants: 22.5 credits