This small bag contains an infinite supply of the loudest snacks imaginable—shatter mints, gargle rocks, crinkle crisps, snap sticks, squeak chews, crunch nuggets, and boom berries. The snacks can be eaten normally, except in a library, archive, scriptorium, or similarly quiet location, where their accompanying sounds and properties are magically amplified to socially unacceptable levels… unless you're in the staff break‑room. They provide no sustenance, but if eaten for 10 rounds within such a location, they count as 1 day of rations. You cannot cast spells with verbal components while the snacks are in your mouth, as they are extremely dry and powdery… in a way that feels almost vindictive.
Shushpocalypse
Whenever you eat snacks from the bag in such a location, make a DC 14 Dexterity check to chew quietly. On a failure, everyone who can hear you within 30 feet instantly knows your location and you also have disadvantage on Stealth checks until the end of your next turn when you finish chewing and swallow… and they may collectively shush you in uncanny, librarian‑like unison (a flavor reaction). In addition, any creature within 5 feet of you involuntarily twitches and makes a small startled noise, becoming frightened of you until the end of your turn. A frightened creature may use its reaction to unleash a loud, panicked shush in your direction… often louder than the snack itself… earning you even more public ire and immediately ending its frightened condition.
Chipmunk Panic
If you both fail the Shushpocalypse check and have already been shushed, you may use your reaction to stop chewing as your eyes bulge and your cheeks puff out with food‑stuffed panic… resembling a chipmunk caught with another chipmunk’s nuts in its mouth. Due to the dry‑powdered nature of the snacks, you must make a DC 14 Constitution check at the end of your turn to swallow the food and end the Shushpocalypse effect; on a failure, you cough and uncontrollably spit out the food… with an unmistakably loud and echoing “patooey,” and the Shushpocalypse effect resumes until the end of your next turn.
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