Aura's First Tome Of Misspells

The tome seems to contain the following spells: Message, Mage Armour, Cure Wounds, Hold Person, Speak With Dead, Fire Storm, Ice Storm, Wish

However, in reality the spells contained are:

- Message = Massage: The target receives a pleasant massage that eases their body aches, and removes up to two levels of exhaustion if a target has them. A creature can benefit from this only once a long rest.

- Mage Armour = Mage Armoir: Summons a fancy wardrobe within 10 ft. of the caster. Any creature that enters the wardrobe and spends one minute to dress themselves can roll and add a d4 on their next charisma check within the next hour. A creature can benefit from this only once per long rest. The wardrobe itself is a normal wooden wardrobe, the contents of which warp out of existence if it is destroyed. A new wardrobe is summoned on every casting of the spell, which simultaneously removes any other wardrobes made by this spell, and the contents of the wardrobe are random each time but equally fashionable. If a creature places any piece of clothing inside the wardrobe, then it is always there when that creature summons a wardrobe, or a replica of it if the original was destroyed or not in the wardrobe last time.

- Cure Wounds = Cute Wounds: The target of the spell receives a wound on their body, and every creature that can see the target must succeed on a DC 14 wisdom saving throw or find them cute for the next hour. This does not restrict any creature from killing the target, but it does sound while finding them cute.

- Hold Person = Cold Person: The target must succeed on a DC 14 wisdom saving throw or be cold for the next hour. The creature feels cold even if it is set on fire, though it takes the same amount of damage it normally would from any sources of heat.

- Speak With Dead = Speak With Dad: The target is granted the ability to telepathically converse with their dad if he is still alive and on the same plane of existence. If he is dead or on a different plane of existence, the creature is instead connected to a random father figure of the DM's choosing.

- Fire Storm = File Storm: Files of all sorts of random official documents rain down in a 30 ft. radius from the chosen point. If a creature takes an action tor read one of these files, roll a d100. On a 100, the creature finds some useful information of the DM's choosing, but on a 1-5 the creature finds the file full of embarassing information about themself. Once a file has been read, all other files vanish from existence.

- Ice Storm = Ice Stork: The spell creates a beautifully carved ice sculpture of a stork within 5 ft. of the caster. Any creature that breaks the stork is cursed, causing an intangible spectral stork to appear within 5 ft. of them and question their every life choice. An infinite number of storks can be amassed in this manner, but upon reaching the hundredth the user also develops a phobia of ice.

- Wish = Wash: A wet sponge cleans the target of the spell vigorously, causing any creature that fails a DC 14 wisdom saving throw to compliment them for the next minute. This does not affect any of the other choices of a creature forced to compliment the target, allowing them to even kill the target of the spell while complimenting them.

All spells have the casting time and range of the original spells and can be cast without expending a spell slot.