Greetings, commoner! Have you found yourself buried in rubble as a red dragon burns your village to the ground? Have your friends been melted by a black dragon's acid breath? Are your chances of survival dwindling by the second? Then you need The Commoner's Guide to Surviving Dragon Attacks!
For just two copper, this handy guide provides easy-to-follow steps to marginally increase your chances of survival in a dragon attack. With the Powers That Be introducing a new series of dragons in Fizban's Treasury of Dragons, you're sure to get your money's worth again and again! Now, read carefully but quickly!
1. Take cover!
When the alarm bells start ringing and the cries of agony fill the skies, it's best not to get curious! Find yourself some shelter, lest ye be turned to toast! Your local tavern's cellar will do the trick, though take a dagger with you in case of giant rats or the stray zombie. They do have a knack for showing up in such places.
Caught in an open field? Worry not! Any boulder that stands between you and a dragon's breath attack can buy you a few more precious seconds of your life. But when in doubt: stop, drop, and try not to scream. A bit of grass won't do much to stop an inferno or the stray bolt of lightning, but being hidden can spare you from the agony of being clawed or winged to death by a dragon.
Cover
Walls, trees, creatures, and other obstacles can provide cover during combat, making a target more difficult to harm. A target can benefit from cover only when an attack or other effect originates on the opposite side of the cover.
Half Cover
A target with half cover has a +2 bonus to AC and Dexterity saving throws. A target has half cover if an obstacle blocks at least half of its body. The obstacle might be a low wall, a large piece of furniture, a narrow tree trunk, or a creature, whether that creature is an enemy or a friend.
Three-Quarters Cover
A target with three-quarters cover has a +5 bonus to AC and Dexterity saving throws. A target has three-quarters cover if about three-quarters of it is covered by an obstacle. The obstacle might be a portcullis, an arrow slit, or a thick tree trunk.
Total Cover
A target with total cover can't be targeted directly by an attack or a spell, although some spells can reach such a target by including it in an area of effect. A target has total cover if it is completely concealed by an obstacle.
Source: Basic rules
2. Identify the dragon
Dragons come in all manner of different types. In fact, a dragon's color could help you identify a good dragon from a bad one, and how they might kill you! Early reports from Fizban, a curious but beloved adventurer, reveal that gem dragons are coming soon to the multiverse. Lucky you, chromatic dragons are your biggest threat until then!
To quickly identify the dragon currently destroying all you know and love, consult the table below:
Identify your dragon!* |
|||
Color | Characteristics | Signature attack | Preferred environment |
Black | Sadistic, prey on the weak, despise humanoid kingdoms | Acid breath (60-foot line, 5 feet wide) | Swamps, ruins of kingdoms |
Blue | Vain, territorial, patient but irritable | Lightning breath (90-feet line, 5 feet wide) | Caverns, tunnels beneath sand |
Green | Deceitful | Poison breath (60-foot cone) | Forests |
Red | Prideful, ambitious | Fire breath (60-foot cone) | Mountains, hills, volcanoes |
White | Vicious, animalistic | Cold breath (60-foot cone) | Icy mountains, glaciers |
* Provided information is for adult dragons. For dragons larger than huge, please consult The Commoner's Guide to Coping With Imminent Death. |
If your dragon's scales have a metallic sheen to them: congratulations, your people are being saved from a great evil! Kindly await the end of the dragon's assault.
Why is a 'good' dragon killing me?
The lines between good and evil can be a bit blurry. A chromatic dragon can be good and a metallic dragon can be evil. In the case of a dragon attack, it's important to consider the context.
Did your village chance upon a treasure chest of sentient magic items? You might have upset a brass dragon. Is an army laying siege to your city? A bronze dragon could be seeking glory. Was your great-great-grandfather a necromancer who hardboiled dragon eggs? A gold dragon could simply be seeking to wipe out your bloodline.
3. Beware the lair
Were you promised endless wealth for sneaking into a cavern? Has a roguish man in a fine hat threatened you into joining his band of thieves to the peak of a snowy mountain? You might have ventured into a dragon's lair. If so, your chances of survival are slimmer — but still not zero!
A dragon attack while you're in its lair isn't just about steering clear of teeth, claws, and the occasional stinky breath. Your surroundings can also pose a deadly risk. A magma geyser might erupt at your feet, a plague of insects could devour you, or that bush you've found yourself in could rip you to shreds! A dragon's type determines how it can manipulate its surroundings. And, oh boy, do some of these dragons pack a wallop!
Luckily, you've identified the dragon screeching overhead in step No. 2. Consult the following to determine whether or not the hiding place you've selected is an early grave:
- Blue dragon: Sandstorms, lightning arcs, collapsing ceilings, oh my! A blue dragon uses its lair to bury and blind its enemies. It can also create an arc of lightning that stretches from one surface to another. Best not stand beside your friends in that case.
- Black dragon: Beware pools of water and swarms of insects! In a black dragon's lair, these are the biggest threats to your life (aside from the dragon itself). If you have to choose between being pulled into a lake or devoured by insects, well, I think the choice is clear.
- Green dragon: Your green thumb won't save you here. A green dragon uses nearby foliage to restrain or shred its enemies. Find yourself a hollowed-out tree trunk and watch your head.
- Red dragon: A red dragon's lair can cook you faster than a marshmallow in a bonfire! When in doubt, it's better to rush into a cloud of volcanic gasses than ignore the lava seeping up out of the earth below you.
- White dragon: I hope you brought your winter clothes, because it is cold, cold, cold in a white dragon's lair. Quick tip: if you see a fog coming over you, get up and run! That stuff will chill you to the bone — literally! Oh, and do watch out for the falling spikes of ice.
4. Don't loot the treasure hoard
Is there a pile of gold nearby? Perhaps some glinting gems or arms that sheen? Leave them alone! Dragons love their treasure and they don't take kindly to humanoids with sticky fingers. In a pinch, though, a treasure hoard might not be the worst spot to hide. At least with red dragons, you're not likely to end up on the receiving end of a fire breath attack as they seek to preserve their riches.
5. Await the heroes
Ignore any inclinations you might have to be brave. Sure, your name might pop up in some bard's song because you took a claw to the face for your local lord, or you could end up in the history books for landing one good jab on the dragon. But is that really better than staying alive? Probably not. So, hunker down where it's safe and hold out for the heroes.
6. Run away!
Alas, the heroes have arrived! (If they haven't, see step No. 7.) With the dragon's attention divided, it's time to rush out of your hiding spot and make your way to safety. As you do, don't get anywhere near the heroes. Sure, they love their attention and praises, but there's always the chance they won't make it through this fight — don't let their deaths be in vain!
We've already covered the different types of breath attacks you'll encounter, so put that knowledge to use by keeping your distance from others. Dragons are highly skilled killers and will happily aim their breath attacks to maximize efficiency.
7. Beg for mercy
Your hiding place has been revealed. The walls around you are crumbling. Your friends, family, and adventurers have all fallen, and you're having a starring contest with a dragon. Now what?
Dragons are prideful and intelligent creatures. Any of them worth their salt is going to have minions (see: kobolds) and connections with the humanoid world. If you have your resume handy or something to parley with, now's the time to whip it out and start pleading your case.
Maybe you have black market connections, training in mason's tools, or have a wonderful singing voice. Whatever it is, pitch it! Swear your fealty and compliment the Nine Hells out of that dragon. Should they accept your offer: congratulations, you're a surviver!
More dragons to come
If you've made it this far: you're welcome! But also, pat yourself on the back. Surviving a dragon attack takes spunk. So, hold your head up high! But maybe not too high. Dragons do pair up at times...
Fizban's Treasury of Dragons is now available for preorder on D&D Beyond! The book adds new player options, including draconic ancestries for dragonborn, dragon-themed monk and ranger subclasses, as well as feats and spells. Learn all about 20 different kinds of dragons and their minions. Dungeon Masters will enjoy the included lair maps and the rich lore behind the First World and more! Those with a Master-tier subscription can share books they've purchased with players in their campaigns.
Michael Galvis (@michaelgalvis) is a tabletop content producer for D&D Beyond. He is a longtime Dungeon Master who enjoys horror films and all things fantasy and sci-fi. When he isn’t in the DM’s seat or rolling dice as his anxious halfling sorcerer, he’s playing League of Legends and Magic: The Gathering with his husband. They live together in Los Angeles with their adorable dog, Quentin.
Lol, what kind of latte?
Anytime my vict- I mean, adventurers, anger me, I have them fight 30 ancient red dragons.