Homebrew Wee Knapkins Species Details

The moon of Calad Bar is full of wonders: skywhales, pipe-organ beasts, and in between it all — the Wee Knapkins, a napkin-sized species of anarchic fey who live in the hills, the undercity, and occasionally your pantry. Known for shouting at clouds, headbutting bureaucrats, and stealing sheep (which they claim are "on loan"), the Wee Knapkins are chaos in tartan form.

They don’t fly so much as walk through the air, because they don’t believe in gravity. Or decorum. Or property. Their attitude toward the laws of physics is the same as their attitude toward tax collectors: loud, disrespectful, and slightly flammable.

Most believe they’re already dead — and that dying again would mean returning to a boring life full of rules and quiet. As such, they approach everything with reckless enthusiasm: fighting, drinking, jousting, debating, stealing sheep, and setting things on fire for educational purposes.

Their society is loosely overseen by Knapkin Kheldas — elderly matriarchs with teapots, tactical slippers, and deep reserves of moral ambiguity. Even so, most Knapkins ignore politics entirely, including Calad Bar’s, because “it's too polite and not nearly on fire enough.”

Despite their size, Wee Knapkins are fierce. Some are wizards. Others are bards, bakers, rogues, alchemists, philosophers, or sheep-lords. One rides a sheep into jousts and only uses his forehead as a weapon. Another invented tactical jam. All of them are nuisances.

They are friends to Velvet Rampage, beloved by the Barking GNU, and considered a statistical anomaly by the Big Four — mostly because their exact population is unknown, fluctuates wildly, and sometimes includes goats.

Wee Knapkins Traits

As a wee knapkin, you have the following racial traits.

Creature Type

You are a Fey.

Size

You are Small.

Speed

Your walking speed is 30 feet.

Knapkin Magic

You know the druidcraft cantrip.

Starting at 3rd level, you can cast the faerie fire spell with this trait. Starting at 5th level, you can also cast the enlarge/reduce spell with this trait. Once you cast faerie fire or enlarge/reduce with this trait, you can’t cast that spell with it again until you finish a long rest. You can also cast either of those spells using any spell slots you have of the appropriate level.

Intelligence, Wisdom, or Charisma is your spellcasting ability for these spells when you cast them with this trait (choose when you select this race).

Airwalker

You have a flying speed of 30 feet, but you do not fly with wings. Instead, you walk through the air by sheer force of disbelief. You can hover, moon-stomp, and pace menacingly three feet off the ground if it suits your argument.