You can speak, read, and write Common and Italian. Can hear the screams of your lunch.

Due to the fluid nature of your form, you can move through a space as narrow as 1 inch without squeezing. You leave behind any items you are carrying, and any equipment which you are proficient with merges into your form until you exit the space.

Your creature type is both humanoid and ooze. You don't require sleep and by moving across surfaces you can break down otherwise inedible substances to garner nutritional value.

If exposed to extremely warm temperatures for an extended period of time, you will begin melt and lose shape. When starting your turn in a hot environment, you take 1d6 necrotic damage at the start of each of your turns.If this damage reduces you to less than half of your maximum hit points, you are considered to be poisoned until your hit points are restored to over half your hit point maximum. Finally, if you are reduced to 0 hit points by this trait you die.

A monster with blindsight can perceive its surroundings without relying on sight, within 30 feet. You are blind beyond this range. Pasta doesn't have eyes.

Similar to a non-newtonian fluid, high attack rolls have no effect, low attack rolls are most damaging. Attack rolls of 1 are considered critical hits, and of 20 are a critical miss and you break your weapon if making an armed strike, or must roll to deal damage to yourself if making an unarmed strike. Instead of adding to 10 when calculating your AC value, subtract from it.

Your Constitution score increases by 2. Your Intelligence score increases by 1.

Timeless... But do check the expiration date.

Neutral alignment, delicious taste.

Depends on serving size and number.

Your base walking speed is 30 feet.