Roll 1d20 and follow the effect table below.
Roll a 1 - A creature you can see that is Hostile towards you gains a free use of the Wish spell. Any creature can cast this spell without verbal or somatic components. However, they need the cremated ashes of your left kidney as a Material component to cast the spell.
"What could possibly go wrong?
Help me...."
Roll a 2 - You and 3 creatures of your choice turn into plushies. All of your Hit Point Maximums are reduced to 5. After a Long Rest, you revert back to your original forms.
"squish"
Roll a 3 - You turn into an Octopus for 1d6+2 hours. Your entire stat block, except for your alignment, Intelligence, and Wisdom is changed to that of an octopus.
"Oh, no, not again!"
Roll a 4 - Every creature within a 50-foot radius of you is teleported to the Nine Hells for five minutes. You teleport back to your current plane after the 5 minutes or when you die with no memory of being in the Nine Hells.
"Can you survive. . . Five Minutes at Devil's?"
Roll a 5 - You regurgitate 5d8 slaad tadpoles.
"Erm. . . uhh. . . excuse me?"
Roll a 6 - Nothing happens. You cannot cast this spell again until you complete a Long Rest.
"The rehab of DND."
Roll a 7 - You regain all expended spell slots.
"Lucky number!"
Roll an 8 - One monster from any place and any plane of existence is teleported in front of you. The monster is Neutral towards you.
"Oh, well, hello there, Mr. Tarrasque. How has your day been?"
Roll a 9 - You gain 1 more action this turn, but that action can only be used for eating grass.
"It CAN be useful. I just don't know how."
Roll a 10 - Nothing happens.
"Is my symbol broken again?!"
Roll an 11 - Five chocolate bars appear in front of you.
"Chocolate?
CHOCOLATE?!?
CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCOLATE!!!!
CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
Roll a 12 - Regain 1d4 hit points and all Exhaustion Levels.
"How are you enjoying your five-course air dinner, my good sir?"
Roll a 13 - A ladder floats above your head until you hit a creature. Upon hitting a creature, the ladder falls. You and the creature make DC 13 Dexterity saving throws. On a failed save, you take 1d20 bludgeoning damage. On a success, you take half as much damage only.
"Thirteen is unlucky. Now you're stuck walking under a ladder for a while."
Roll a 14 - Your skin turns blue and you grow 1 size for 1d4 days.
"They call 'im Big Blue."
Roll a 15 - The next spell you cast requires no Spell Slot or material component.
"MORE GAMBLING!"
Roll a 16 - 10 eggs appear within 10 feet of you in random spots. Each of these eggs contains 1 platinum and 5 gold.
"Capitalist Easter. No context needed."
Roll a 17 - Gain 15 temporary hit points and Proficiency in all stats for 1 hour.
"Noice."
Roll an 18 - An object of your choice appears within 10 feet of you. The object cannot be Huge or larger.
"I cast piano!"
Roll a 19 - 1 creature of your choice within your sight takes 1d100 necrotic damage.
"I'm in danger!"
Roll a 20 - You turn into an Aboleth for 2 hours.
"It's abolethin' time."
* - (a mummified goblin hand)
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