The stress of college life has driven you to madness. You can use your unpredictable nature to distract your foes, and empower your allies. DISCLAIMER: Uses a homebrew Wild Magic Table for some abilities, make sure this works for your DM.
Ridiculous Defense
When you join the College of Lunacy at 3rd level, you gain proficiency in the Disguise Kit if you aren't already, and make a Costume specific to your expression of madness. You could possibly wear a bunny suit or even nothing at all. Your sheer unpredictability makes it difficult for enemies to get a solid hit on you, because they just can't grasp what the hell is going on in front of them.
While you wear your costume and no armor or shield, add your proficiency bonus to your AC (AC = 10 + DEX + Proficiency Bonus).
Starting at 3rd level, you can do something unpredictable to distract and/or throw your opponents off.
As an action, you can roll on the Wild Magic Surge Table and use one of your Bardic Inspiration die. Any enemies that can see your action within 60ft of you must roll a Wisdom save against your spellcasting DC. On a failed save, reduce the number rolled from the inspiration die to their Attack Rolls, Ability Checks, and Saving Throws until the start of your next turn.
Random Success
At 6th level you've learned to make the most of your madness, finding a way to help your allies come out on top.
As a reaction, when an ally fails an attack roll, ability check, or saving throw, you can give them an Inspiration die to add to the roll. If the die turns it to a success, roll the Wild Magic Surge table. (Creature can't have already added an Inspiration die to the roll)
Spreading Madness
At 14th level, you can spread your madness to your enemies.
As an action, you can infect the minds of your enemies. Any enemies within 60ft of you must make an Intelligence save against your spellcasting DC. On a failed save, each creature is subject to Confusion. You must continue to use your actions on this ability each turn to keep the remaining confused creatures under this effect. You can use this ability a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus per long rest.
Wild Magic Table
--- Credit to list is from Famous Jake on YouTube.
Video Here ---
01-02 -Summon a squirrel at your feet. If in range (60ft), next round you cast
Power Word Kill on it.
03-04 - Regain all expended Bardic Inspiration die.
05-06 - Give all remaining Bardic Inspiration die to a creature of your choice. Their next action uses them all.
07-08 - You are proficient in ALL skills for 1 hour.
09-10 - Up to 10 creatures of your choice begin chanting your name as their bonus action.
11-12 - A random creature within 30 ft of you starts to uncontrollably laugh at whatever you say.
13-14 - Do a backflip.
15-16 - Cast
Mass Suggestion on all children within a 20 mile radius. They are convinced to kill your party. The spell ends after 24 hours or until your party is dead.
17-18 - Your eyes fall out. You can still see through them. After consuming them both, your eyes will instantly reappear in their sockets unharmed.
19-20 - You lay an ostrich egg.
21-22 - You slap yourself and take 1d4 damage.
23-24 - You speak exclusively in Elvish for the next 1d10 hours.
25-26 - A miniature version of yourself is summoned. It has the stats of a
homunculus and 1/4 the power of your abilities. It screams whenever you cast a spell, giving everyone disadvantage that round.
27-28 - You hear a maddening voice in your head that deals 1d6 psychic damage every minute until you kill a creature.
29-30 - You are put in a motionless trance reciting some ancient story in an ancient language for 1 hour or until you take damage.
31-32 - Your head detaches from your body and floats up 100 ft into the air. You see with your head, but can still control your body normally. After 2 minutes, your head falls.
33-34 - A basic hat of your choice appears on your head.
35-36 - You throw up acid on a creature of your choice dealing 3d6 damage.
37-38 - Your gain another stomach.
39-40 - Summon a grand piano over a location of your choice.
41-42 - All of your equipment, including instruments and weapons, become tiny for 1 minute.
43-44 - Up to 6 people of your choosing gain advantage on their next turn.
45-46 - Cast
True Polymorph on any creature of cr 2 or lower and turn them into an instrument of your choice. You can use the instrument and speak with the creature if you can understand its language.
47-48 - Everyone within a 30 ft radius of you are dressed in masterfully crafted Nobel attire.
49-50 - A cabbage appears in front of you.
53-54 - Shout a piercing bolt that deals 2d8 psychic damage.
57-58 - Cast
Dream on the last creature you spoke to.
59-60 - A small dark raining cloud follows you around for 24 hours, even indoors.
61-62 - Summon a masterfully-crafted costume of a creature of your choice.
63-64 - Your head becomes 3 times larger for 1d8 hours.
65-66 - Summon a kazoo for up to 6 creatures.
67-68 - Turn a non-magical weapon within 20 ft of you into a
poisonous snake.
69-70 - Your feet are stuck to the ground for 5 minutes.
71-72 - Cast
Bestow Curse on yourself. Enemies have advantage on attack rolls against you for 1 minute or until the curse is removed.
73-74 - Cast
Commune with a deity of your choice.
75-76 - Sing the perfect note and instantly use Song of Rest for all creatures within earshot.
77-78 - Your remaining Bardic Inspiration die become d12s. Any die regained afterwards revert to your normal die.
79-80 - You cast
Confusion centered on yourself.
81-82 - You cast
Fly on a random creature within 60 feet of you.
83-84 - Grow wings for the next 5 minute. You have 30 flight speed.
85-86 - Your weapons become animated. They have the same stats as a
flying sword. For 1 minute or until they reach 0 hp, they attack all creatures.
87-88 - Your hands are replaced by lobster claws for 1 hour. They deal (your level x d6) unarmed piercing damage.
89-90 - You summon a
Lemure. You own it's soul.
91-92 - Every creature within 30 ft of you gains an udder for 1 hour.
93-94 - It rains a food weighing less than 5 lbs of your choice for the next hour in a 30 ft radius over your person. Even indoors.
95-96 - You smell as though you haven't bathed in your life. Bathe to remove the effect.
97-98 - You poop.
99-00 - For the next minute any d20 rolls that are 5 or below, activate this wild magic chart
Base Class: Bard
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