Oath of Memes

The Oath of Memes binds a paladin to the loftiest ideals of laughter, pleasure and enjoyment. Sometimes called Memers, Viners or Old School Jokers, these paladins meet the ideal of the knight in shining armour, acting with honour in pursuit of spreading laughter and entertainment. They hold themselves to the highest standards of conduct, and some, for better or worse, hold the rest of the world to the same standards. Many who swear this oath are devoted to gods of trickery and good and use their gods’ tenets as the measure of their devotion. They often incorporate images of Meme logos into their helmets or coats of arms and spend their free time thinking of new ways to provide laughter amongst a party.

Channel Divinity

When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options.

Sacred Weapon. As an action, you can imbue one weapon that you are holding with positive energy, using your Channel Divinity. For 1 minute, you add your Charisma modifier to attack rolls made with that weapon (with a minimum bonus of +1). The weapon also emits bright light in a 20-foot radius and dim light 20 feet beyond that. If the weapon is not already magical, it becomes magical for the duration.

You can end this effect on your turn as part of any other action. If you are no longer holding or carrying this weapon, or if you fall unconscious, this effect ends.

Turn the Unholy. As an action, you present your holy symbol and speak a prayer censuring fiends and undead, using your Channel Divinity. Each fiend or undead that can see or hear you within 30 feet of you must make a Wisdom saving throw. If the creature fails its saving throw, it is turned for 1 minute or until it takes damage.

A turned creature must spend its turns trying to move as far away from you as it can, and it can’t willingly move to a space within 30 feet of you. It also can’t take reactions. For its action, it can use only the Dash action or try to escape from an effect that prevents it from moving. If there’s nowhere to move, the creature can use the Dodge action.

Oath Spells

You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.

Oath of Devotion Spells

It's just a prank bro

Once per short rest, you attempt to end a fight early by speaking this. The target must make a Wisdom saving throw. On a failed save the combat ends with that enemy unless they are attacked again. On a successful save however the target enters rage like state against you with the same benefits as a barbarian receives. If the target is already raging they gain immunity to all of your attacks and have advantage to hit you for the next 2d4 turns.

Jesus take the Wheel

Once per long rest, you summon your god into your body for 1 turn. Your god makes two attacks with your weapons dealing radiant/ necrotic damage, whichever is more effective against your opponents. Each attack has doubled damage and stacks with a natural 20 on the initial attack roll.

At 14th level this adds 2 additional damage dice to your gods attacks and can use this feature twice per long rest

Parry this you f**ing casual

A pistol appears in your hands for 1d4 turns with a +12 to hit and advantage to hit. The damage it deals is the same as a regular pistol in the campaign setting with 2 additional dice rolls. If used against an ally it heals them for the damage rolled.

At 18th level the pistol deals damage to creatures in a 10 foot radius to the target, dealing half damage to them or healing allies with the halved damage dealt.

Is that a Weed! I'm calling the Police

At 13th level you spot someone doing something suspicious and summon a group of 5 law enforcement officials to help you. They take your turn in initiative and will attack as usual unless you tell them otherwise using your bonus action. Their appearance is up to the DM but they have a 18 AC and 30 HP each. This feature can only be used twice per long rest.

You can expend one spell slot to summon another 5 officials to aid you if you wish.

Vicious Macarena

At 20th level, as an action, you can make all enemies in a 10 foot radius do the macarena with an INT save equal to your spell DC +5. They take 4d20 psychic damage and all attacks against them have have advantage, their AC is lowered by 4 (no lower than 16). they can repeat the saving throw at the end of each of their turns or until 2d6 turns have passed.

In addition, for the duration, you have advantage on saving throws against spells cast by fiends or undead.

Once you use this feature, you can’t use it again until you finish a long rest.

The Banhammer

Once per day, you can conjure a large floating pepe holding a sword, axe or hammer (players choice). the image attacks up to 5 targets. each target must succeed on a DC, equal to your spell DC + CHA +5, or be banished to a plane of existence that is harmless for 1d6 days. Whilst in the new plane they are incapacitated.

If the targets are native to the plane they are banished to the stay in that realm for 2d6 days. When the targets return they occupy the same space as before or the nearest unoccupied one. They hunt the player who banished them for 2d6 days moving without need for rest or sustenance allowing them to cover ground very rapidly. 

They return to their original place after the time has passed or the player has been killed.