Patron: THE Betty White

THE Betty White's motives are benevolent to mortals, and Her Charisma so immense and powerful that even the greatest scholars cannot fully document the effects that She has produced, both directly and through those who have aligned themselves with Her. She is friendly with those who have been bestowed with a fraction of Her power and is known to frequently directly contact Her Thralls telepathically, through visions or in “person”. 

Yes, when you tap into Her powers, you become Enthralled by Her indelible humor and charisma. But you really don’t mind. She is a wonderful Patron.

THE Betty White does not identify as any Type of creature (Celestial, Demonic, Humanoid). She is of all Types and None, but she only appears as a Human Female of a particular age, one who celebrates the anniversary of her 29th Birthday.

The Quick-Wit

THE Betty White lets you choose from an expanded list of spells when you learn a warlock spell. The following spells are added to the warlock spell list for you.

THE Betty White Expanded Spell

SPELL LEVEL	SPELLS
1st	charm person, Comprehend Languages
2nd	Alter-Self, Enthrall
3rd	Hypnotic Pattern, Tongues
5th	Modify Memory, telepathic bond
9th	Wish

The Eloquence

Starting at 1st level, the Eloquence of Betty gives you the ability to touch the minds of other creatures. You can telepathically speak to any creature you can see within 30 feet of you. You don’t need to share a language with the creature for it to understand your telepathic message, but the creature must have the ability to laugh in some capacity (common examples include Humanoids, mammals, Draconics, Celestials, Infernals, Creatures with Intelligence of 4 or above).

The Grace

The attacker instantly regrets its attack against an avatar of THE Betty White and is drowned in remorse for doing so. The caster may, as a reaction when the attack is announced, but before any rolls are made, invoke the Ward. The attack is interrupted and all damage is negated (including damage that is unpreventable by other conditions) to both attacker and the Thrall. 

Additionally, the attacker loses the remainder of its turn on a failed Wisdom save. This effect persists for an additional number of rounds equal to your Charisma modifier (minimum 0). 

At the start of each of the target's turns, the target gets to make a new saving throw to end the spell.
Once you use this feature, it cannot be invoked again until you finish a long rest. 

The Humor

Those who channel the power of Betty can compel those around them to laugh at the joke (a audible manifestation of The Humor of THE Betty White), regardless of how funny it is to the target. All creatures in the area of effect are forced to make a Wisdom save. All targets in the area are healed for 2d8+Charisma Modifier (Minimum 0). On a successful save (DC10), each creature gains Advantage on their next two rolls (any kind) and gains Inspiration if they don't already have it. On a failed save, the target will lose it’s actions for the duration of the spell and retains Advantage on their next roll (any kind). An affected target loses Concentration and draws attention to itself. (Author’s Suggestion: automatic Success on all rolls to Detect the target, opposed rolls are unopposed or Advantage on Attack rolls against the creature)

The kind of laughter is a portion of the Verbal component (the Caster laughs after the punchline or end of the anecdote) and controls what kind of laugh they affect the target(s) with - Amused, Hysterical, Joyful, Nervous, etc. There is no evidence that the Joke was empowered by THE Betty White without the use of a Detect Magic spell. Otherwise, it is felt by the target(s) and viewers that they simply find the Joke incredibly funny. 

Also, the caster can choose to have no spell effects associated with the Joke, but everyone able to hear them will be at minimum amused. It is considered as a Critical Success on a Performance Skill check.
The caster may use this power once per minute and a number of times equal to their Proficiency Bonus. This is refreshed after a Long Rest. 

The Fans

At 14th level, you gain the ability to influence a humanoid’s mind (minimum Intelligence or Wisdom of 6) with THE Betty Whites’s amazing beauty. You can use your action to touch an incapacitated humanoid or those that are affected by LOL. That creature is then charmed by you until a remove curse spell is cast on it, the charmed condition is removed from it, or you use this feature again.

If the caster and target both agree, the target is permanently granted the Magic Initiate Feat (Warlock). The 1st-level spell granted from the Feat must be chosen from the bonus spell list for this subclass. Both 1st- and 2nd-level spells are valid choices. 

You can communicate telepathically with the charmed creature as long as the two of you are on the same plane of existence.