Humor-Philiac

Spells can absolutely be cast with a spell slot, but you have the innate ability to take blood and mix it with your own magic to cast a spell.  After all, sorcery is magic from within. 

 

Clownin' Out

Your powers may come from blood magic, but you're still a clown.  You start with abilities that are more for entertainment than dismemberment for now.  You may choose one of the following abilities to give your character. These abilities can only be used once until you take a short or long rest.

Can't You Take a Joke?

If you cast Viscous Mockery successfully, you can use your bonus action to add insult to injury. At the start of its next turn, the target must use its movement to get within 5 feet of you (or as close as possible), and then use its action to make a melee attack against you (if possible). It can then carry out the rest of its turn as normal.

Laughter's the Best Medicine

As an action, you can make an attempt to heal an ally. You must both be within line of sight and/or able to hear each other. Make a Performance check to determine how much health is recovered.  (Before you roll, you may use 1 hitpoint to add you CON modifier to the score.)

• Critical fail: targeted ally hates your taste in humor. They make a Wisdom saving throw. If they fail, they loudly scorn you. You take 1 point of emotional psychic damage. 
• DC 0-5: they sigh; no health recovered 
• DC 5-10: they snicker; 1 point recovered 
• DC 11-15: they chuckle; 2 points recovered 
• DC 16 or higher: they belly-laugh; 3 points recovered 
• Critical success: you managed to make them cry laughing. They recover 5 health, and gain 5 temporary hitpoints. However, they must make a Wisdom saving throw. If they fail, they laugh hard enough to fall prone.

Turn that Frown Upside-down

Choose a target humanoid. Use an action to attempt to cheer them up. They make a Wisdom saving throw (which they can choose to fail) against your Spell DC. If they fail, you may choose to suppress the effects that charm or frighten the target, or make the target indifferent to creatures they are currently hostile towards. Either effect lasts for 30 seconds, or until the target and/or its allies are harmed.

Pap-Hilarious

As a hemomancer, your blood is naturally magical. The rest of the world, not so much. You can use your own blood to add spell slots and sorcery points, but other creature's blood needs to be enchanted. In the time of one action to turn a number of blood vials (or 4 oz in any mundane container) equal to your Sorcerer level into psudo Humor-Philiac blood. Each vial is worth 1 hitpoint for the purposes of the Humor-Philiac subclass.

Starting at level 1, you can use an action to spend 5 HP to recover any one charge that requires a short rest.

Give Them a Hand

A clown can't just rely on silly quirks and quick jokes. Sometimes, you gotta use physical humor. Choose one of the abilities listed (or an additional Clownin' Out ability, with an additional charge). You can only use this ability once per short rest.

AWOO-GAH!

Sound the bike war horn! As an unarmed strike, deal 2d6 thunder damage on success 

Custard Pie

Let 'em have it! c:< You can make your unarmed strike a ranged attack (20/60 ft)

Joy Buzzer

Add an extra d8 lightning damage to your unarmed strike. You can also make a Deception roll against any creature not hostile towards you. On success, you can touch the target to deal 3d8 lightning damage.

Globin Trotting

Time to get the juices flowing. The magical blood you have can be used for spells and sorcery points. Use an action  to do any of the following:

• Recovering a spent spell slot- (4 oz)x(slot level)²
• Recovering a spent sorcery point- 8 oz per point
• Adding a new temporary spell slot- (20 oz)x(slot level)²
• Adding a new temporary sorcery point- 30 oz per point

Literal Pocket Dimension

Let's see what's in this tiny back pocket... Oh! It's an oversized hammer and a large serrated blade! As an action, you can reach behind yourself and pull out any mundane weapon. As a bonus action, you can spend blood to imbue the weapon. This only works if you imbue it before you pull it out.

• +1 weapon: 12 oz
• +2 weapon: 32 oz
• +3 weapon: 68 oz
• Silly weapon (the weapon damage is changed to psychic, you gain proficiency with it, and add your CON modifier) : 40 oz

Siphon? Psy-Fun!

No more carefully collecting other creature's blood for you! You can now command blood easily. Well, at least spilled blood. If it's still inside, that's a bit trickier. As an action, you can pull up to 200 oz (50 HP) of spilled blood. Alternatively, you can try pulling blood out of a wounded target. Make a CON roll against their CON saving throw. On success, deal 4d10 necrotic damage, and you gain the blood equal to the damage dealt. On fail, deal 5d4 necrotic damage and gain blood equal to the damage 

Let's Put the "Laughter" Back in "Manslaughter"

Your back pocket seems to have lots of fun little tricks. You can take the fresh corpse of a creature and put it behind you. Once in your Literal Pocket Dimension, its max HP becomes blood for you to use. The corpse can only be at most 24 hours old (undead corpses count the time before resurrection).

You're so Vein, you Think My Magic Came from You

Your magic is oh so easy to transfer now. You no longer need to spend anything to transfer your magic into blood. Any blood you have on you can immediately be counted towards a blood cost (provided you have the actions to do so)