College of the Uke

"They laugh when I take it out of its little case. They stop laughing by the second verse."

The College of the Uke trains bards who have found their voice not in the thunder of a lute or the wail of a horn, but in the intimate, four-stringed warmth of the ukulele. These bards are often underestimated, mistaken for buskers, entertainers, or harmless eccentrics, right up until the moment their "silly little song" turns the tide of a battle or unravels a tyrant's composure. Ukulele bards believe that the most powerful magic doesn't need to be loud; it needs to be true. A single sincere verse, played on an instrument small enough to fit in a satchel, can disarm a hostile court, steady a dying ally, or make a giant feel, for one confusing moment, very silly indeed.

Bards of this college are found in taverns, refugee camps, children's wards, and prison cells — anywhere a big sound would be inappropriate, but a small one is needed most.

Disarming Chord

You've learned to make yourself sound harmless, which is exactly what makes you dangerous. As a bonus action, you may play a quick tune on your ukulele and choose one creature within 30 feet that can hear you. That creature must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or be charmed by you until the end of your next turn, during which time it regards you as unthreatening and mildly delightful. While charmed this way, the creature has disadvantage on attack rolls against you, and if it was going to target you with a spell or ability requiring concentration or focus, there's a decent chance (in your GM's judgment) it hesitates for just a moment too long.

Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a short or long rest, unless you expend a use of Bardic Inspiration to use it again immediately.

Level 3: Pocket sized presence

Your instrument is small, your footprint is smaller, and your ability to be underestimated is a weapon in itself. You gain the following benefits:

• You can play your ukulele one-handed without penalty, including while holding a weapon, shield, or component pouch in your other hand.
• You have advantage on Charisma (Performance) and Charisma (Persuasion) checks made against any creature that has not yet seen you use magic or take violent action.
• Once per short rest, when you would be hit by an attack, you can play a quick, self-deprecating riff as a reaction. The attacker must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw (DC = your bardic spell save DC) or the attack automatically misses, as they're thrown off by how genuinely unthreatening you seem in that instant.

4 strings one truth

You've learned that a song doesn't need many notes to carry real weight; it just needs to mean something. When you cast a spell that has a casting time of 1 action and requires Verbal components, you can instead cast it using your ukulele in place of the verbal component (representing a short, meaningful musical phrase rather than words), so long as the spell's effect could plausibly be carried by music or emotion.

Additionally, you can use your Bardic Inspiration die to add to any saving throw made by a creature within 30 feet of you against being frightened, charmed, or having its emotions magically altered, including your own saving throws against such effects. This doesn't require your reaction, but you can only do this once per creature per turn.

The loudest Quiet Song

You've learned that a small song, played at exactly the right moment, can land harder than any battle hymn, because nobody sees it coming. As an action, you strum a single, devastating chord that carries every ounce of feeling you've been holding back. Choose any number of creatures you can see within 60 feet. Each one must make a Wisdom saving throw.

• Hostile creatures who fail are stunned until the end of your next turn, overwhelmed by an emotional gut-punch they were nowhere near ready for.
• Willing creatures instead regain hit points equal to two Bardic Inspiration dice rolled together plus your Charisma modifier, and gain advantage on their next saving throw against being frightened or charmed before the start of your next turn.

Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.