problem players

this thread is a place to out your storys of problem players and also any tips you may have to dealing with them.

srrisly tho im DMing for the first time today and im worryed one of the players could be a problem player.

Wrong forum.

Eh. Not really the wrong forum, but I would suggest moving it to General Discussion if you want more things.

There was one player I had in an in-person game a while back who would come with incorrectly min-maxed characters, then argue about how it should work. The main way I stopped that for the time being was simply to say, "I am the DM. Stop arguing." 

this is General Discussion tho

Quote from SoulSealedSulfur >>

this is General Discussion tho

The thread got moved by the moderators.

There are no real universal tips for dealing with problem players because there is no universal solution to the infinite ways a player can be a problem.  If you are having a specific problem and want the advice of the forums, your best course of action is going to be spelling out (a) what the problem is and (b) what are the circumstances of the game (in person or remote? Are you playing with an existing friend group?  Are there other issues relevant to the discussion those giving advice might not know about?).

Otherwise, the only real advice anyone can give are platitudes. Be fair and treat all players equally.  Make sure the problem player knows it is a team game and everyone’s enjoyment is necessary.  Have a new session zero to establish boundaries.  Divorce your feelings as a friend from your role as DM, and make sure they understand you are speaking not just as yourself, but as the DM.

All of that is fine, usually universal advice (though there’s obviously situations that warrant more dramatic responses than a new session zero).  But it probably does not help you as much as something tailored to your specific circumstances. 

Quote from Caerwyn_Glyndwr >>

There are no real universal tips for dealing with problem players because there is no universal solution to the infinite ways a player can be a problem.  

 There's one, IMO: Talk to your players about problems outside of the game, rather than trying to fix problems with in-game methods.

Quote from jl8e >>

Quote from Caerwyn_Glyndwr >>

There are no real universal tips for dealing with problem players because there is no universal solution to the infinite ways a player can be a problem.  

 There's one, IMO: Talk to your players about problems outside of the game, rather than trying to fix problems with in-game methods.

 
I agree with this on the big, game-killing ways a person can be a problem, as well as it being the best baseline advice for pick up groups.  But I do not think it is a universal solution.

Some players, for example, respond poorly to being told by a person in a position of authority how to act - and for better or worse, the DM is in a position of authority over a campaign.  Those kinds of player often respond better to learning the correct answer on their own, such as through imposition of in-game consequences.  I find this is particularly true of new players or players who have gotten away with things like murder-hoboing in the past—they don’t want to break character to be told “you are not playing the game right;” they want to develop themselves through their in-game lessons.

So, while I think the above is generally good advice, I would be hesitant to say it constitutes a “universal solution” to problem players.

I've been pretty lucky in that I haven't really had any "problem players'. 

I did have an occasion where one of the players was experienced at D&D and the other players were all brand new to it. The experienced player tended to take the lead in every situation, speaking first to NPC's, coming up with ideas for plans first, etc. This seemed to be stifling the ability of the new players to try things out and get involved, so I simply talked to the experienced player 1-on-1 after session one time and explained that I loved their enthusiasm, however would it be possible to maybe step back a bit and let the newer players react first for a bit so they could get more experience and feel more comfortable making decisions in-game. The experienced player agreed, and there haven't really been any issues since.

I'll say as a general tip, one way to curtail "problem players" is simply to ensure that expectations for the game are known by all. This includes expectations of the type of game it is going to be, behavior of players at the table, etc. Things like a 2-drink maximum, explaining and using safety tools, the type of game being played (heavy on combat, more focused on social encounters, gritty realism, etc), etc being explicitly stated at the beginning of the campaign will make sure that it's not just you as the DM holding people accountable, but players holding players (and players holding you, the DM) accountable as well. 

Of course this won't solve every problem and address every problem player, but properly setting expectations for how the game will be played, both in-game and at the table, goes a long way to making sure everyone is on the same page. 

I haven't really had a problem player in a while except for this one munchkin and I knew it was a bad idea to let him in the group. He hangs out with this troll I met at Synagogue. He is a self proclaimed troll but in real life he's alright. Just don't friend him online. Anyway, his friend wanted to play so against my better judgement I agreed.

Now, I don't care if players steal or PvP but they have to be ready for the consequences and I'm not favoring any side in those fights. In fact I sometimes encourage distrust as a DM for plot and every other time it has worked out well but this dude was just really trying to screw everyone over and ruin their game not just be the dirt bag character in the party. He stole everyone's gold for spells, took the enchanted items from other players while they were sleeping. He even stole the other Wizard's spellbook to copy it and then tossed it overboard into the sea. Eventually, he came clean to the party at the end of a session because they hit a real threat and he realized he might have just killed himself along with them. A few days go by and I mentioned he screwed the party over in the Discord but he forgot he came out to them. So then he got pissed and I screenshotted his text apologizing to the party on Discord saying it was what his character would do. Then he rage quit.

My only advice to deal with party on party backstabbery is just to roll the dice and let the players sort it out. As for munchkins in general just ignore their pestering about wanting to run a level 20 character in a level 1-4 campaign and enforce whatever rules you make. I cannot think of anyone else who was ever an issue at the table but then I embrace players going nuts.

... wait no I take that back. We did have a racist join us once. They claimed Jews were a race so I banned them after discussing it with them and linked them a article on the racism of a certain group from the US National Holocaust Museum whose sentiments and statements he was mirroring exactly. Most my family died in that so I don't really want that around me. Otherwise I've never had another issue like that despite having players of every majority and minority in the mix. Like we don't need to agree on everything but we should at least tolerate each other enough to play a game instead of using gaming as a way to harass people. In fact the trans community from D&D had my back when I was being sexually harassed by a trans moderator I rejected when they asked me out in Star Citizen and then banned me. They came after me on other platforms and tried to have my Discord account banned but D&D players had my back because I never cared about their gender. It just isn't my orientation. It was then I knew my tribe. I'm a neckbreard not a space dad.