My players will be getting a Sentient Magic Item that is self aware it's in a DND Game and will be making related puns. I am awful at making jokes/puns so I am asking you guys for help.
If you're curious, the item will be based off EmberFist. Thanks in advance!
When they do a perception check one day have the item question them, "Do you often hear voices in your head explain what something is to you while you stare so intently at it?"
Not a pun, but have the item call the party out when they metagame.
Dm- the hobgoblin has taken 6 damage.
Player serving as leader- that means it's taken 10 damage. It only needs to lose 1 more HP to die. Cast Green Flame Blade on the goblin next to it.
Self aware Emberfist- How exactly do you know how many HP this hobgoblin has let alone any hobgoblin? You've never faced a hobgoblin with this set of characters and their average intelligence barely needs a second hand to count to.
Or when a crit gets rolled:
SAEF- Can I roll the extra dice on that crit?
If it isn't getting a bunch of use:
SAEF- Now I know what Donkey from Shrek was feeling when he said, "Pick me! Pick me!"
My players will be getting a Sentient Magic Item that is self aware it's in a DND Game and will be making related puns. I am awful at making jokes/puns so I am asking you guys for help.
If you're curious, the item will be based off EmberFist. Thanks in advance!
https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/7ouqrx/your_best_dd_puns/
Read Piers Anthonys Magic of Xanth, at least the first 3 books.
The artifact starts gibbering "Roll the dice, buy some spice, catch some lice, men and mice …"
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt
The party walks through a field of tulips that try to kiss them
Bottles of Boot Rear, when you drink them you feel a kick in your butt
a wooden plaque on the wall with the rear end of a cat sticking out of it.
Read some Terry Pratchett novels. Lots of puns, lots of ideas.
playing since 1986
When they do a perception check one day have the item question them, "Do you often hear voices in your head explain what something is to you while you stare so intently at it?"
Not a pun, but have the item call the party out when they metagame.
Dm- the hobgoblin has taken 6 damage.
Player serving as leader- that means it's taken 10 damage. It only needs to lose 1 more HP to die. Cast Green Flame Blade on the goblin next to it.
Self aware Emberfist- How exactly do you know how many HP this hobgoblin has let alone any hobgoblin? You've never faced a hobgoblin with this set of characters and their average intelligence barely needs a second hand to count to.
Or when a crit gets rolled:
SAEF- Can I roll the extra dice on that crit?
If it isn't getting a bunch of use:
SAEF- Now I know what Donkey from Shrek was feeling when he said, "Pick me! Pick me!"
If someone farts:
SAEF- Now I'll make attacks at disadvantage...
For the math guys (and girls) there's my go-to original D&D joke:
"What's the opposite of a gelatinous cube? A gelatinous third root!"
Wizard (Gandalf) of the Tolkien Club