Context, we were talking to the Horsemen of War and we were basically too weak at the time to actually do anything and my character (who is a Divination bunny with horrendous HP) tried to establish a sense of dominance by talking him down.
"Wisdom stems from patience, and patience from frustration. Anything you say or do to us will only make me smarter and your plan weaker"
Cut to a week later where literally when we gave up hope on stopping the actual war and clearing our names, my character had the biggest brain moment I've ever had in and out of character where I found a way to clear our names and help calm the war down. Just saying the b***h made her smarter so it was his fault.
Never got to deliver the lines, but it would have been an epic moment... Tez was our BBEG... Both Milosh and Raigor were party members.
Tez: "You should have been my ally. I still don't understand why you're working with these pious patsies. Our goals align. Join me; help me kill the rest of the gods, and I'll make you regent of any plane you choose." Kat: "It's true. If you had come to me openly and in good faith before all of this started, I might have been your greatest disciple. Had you come to me with your plan even a year ago, I might have given it more than a passing thought, yet in the time since then you have done an injury to my honor, and that I can never forgive." Tez: "What injury to your honor?" Kat: "You stole from me." Tez: "I never--" Kat: "I know you will say that other hands did the deed. Your protestations fall on deaf ears. A malign intelligence has orchestrated all our suffering, and you were the architect of that plan." Tez: "What is it I'm meant to have stolen?" Kat: "You stole from me the chance to be reconciled with Kaia. With her death, I'll never know who she might have been when freed from your control." Tez: "You'd have been disappointed." Kat: "You stole Milosh's childhood from me." Tez: "That insignificant bug?" Kat: "Give me Raigor back, you son of a *****!"
"Sid Winterhall is Sid Winterhall in Sid Winterhall" - SerLoxy's amazing memos from a quest, many years ago.
To this day we still have absolutely no idea what I meant to write, but we laughed our a**es off then and everytime I stumble across the quote. It was actually some crucial bit of a information, like some big revelation, that is now forever lost. Even the DM couldn't decipher what the heck I wanted to mean by that. :P
(Barbarian skewers Divine Soul Sorcerer with multiple javelins)
(Divine Soul Sorcerer uses their “Unearthly Recovery” ability to heal themselves; forcing the javelins out of their body, and they clatter to the ground)
Divine Soul Sorcerer: (fixes their red eyes on the Barbarian) “….MORE.”
Barbarian: “…I go the f*ck back inside!”
(runs back into tower from this terrifying wraith)
In an intrigue game, my bard and the inquisitive rogue (being the whole party) had been chasing down a mysterious figure with an "M" monogram which they embroidered into the coats of every one of their henchmen. We found a secret room at the Dean of the university's office, and found these coats in there. She then confronted us from the doorway with a gun, and reveals her name is Moriarty.
I realise we're screwed if we don't get past her, and we have no fighters or barbarians to do that. So, as a bard, I start talking.
Me: "It's all well and good, and I would applaud you were it not for the mistakes."
Moriarty: "...mistakes? I don't make mistakes."
Me: "well, somebody did. If I may?" *gestures to the hanging coats.*
DM as Moriarty, clearly curious where this is going, nods.
Me, picking up a coat. "Take this coat, for example." *steps closer as if to show her something* "With the M embroidered inside. Only a fool would let me get this close."
Me, to DM: "I throw the coat over her head and make a shove to knock her over, so we can run."
DM: "I... What? How did... I thought you were going to talk about the embroidered M! I did not see that coming! Yes, you absolutely dupe her into that! Make a contested strength check, with advantage!"
After being called to join in a brutal fight, initiated by a party member, a kobold PC says, "I told you this when we met. What part of 'I will not harm a dragon; all dragons are sacred,' did you not understand?"
"It's true that your friends may overwhelm me. Eventually. But not before I've torn your head off and used your skull for a chamber pot. So think carefully about whether or not you truly wish to 'start something', city dweller." My barbarian succeeding an Intimidate check.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Find your own truth, choose your enemies carefully, and never deal with a dragon.
"Canon" is what's factual to D&D lore. "Cannon" is what you're going to be shot with if you keep getting the word wrong.
My dmpc doesn't trust the rouge as he killed a halfling commoner for no reason(very in charicter tbh)
So when/if a conversation about trust comes up i'm going to work this in
"the only reason i'm giving you a chance is because I hear theres hounor among theives"
The dmpcs first line was when the rounge was battling rats at the inn "blimey what the bloody 'ells this racket i was tryna get some sleep ... Want a hand with them rats?"
The dead halfling is a recurring topic/joke now
My player wanted to dm so i let him rewrite the inn encounter but with hew pcs and his own dmpc but set it in the extended lore of the main campain
Dm(as we enter the room of said halfling murder) you find a halfling skeleton what do you do
Dwarf: Well nothing we can do(pause)he's dead let's go kill some orcs
Party were attacking ice giants, one was a homebrew monster called an Avalanche, which was so corrupted with cold that it was basically a walking glacier. It had an AC of 24.
The barbarian, with a strength of 20 and at level 12, so +9 to hit, failed to hit, for three turns in a row, with reckless attack and two attacks per turn.
On the fourth turn he was attacking, I said "Let's try to give you some luck," and asked what his character was doing, giving his character his full name. The other players started chanting his full name, and he rolled a nat 20 to hit, and killed the Avalanche (it was badly hurt from others already). He then ran to another giant who had just been thrown from a skyship by a t-rex, and everyone started chanting again. Second attack, also a nat 20! That giant also died, and then the skyship crashed into a hill and the combat was wrapped up.
I have a recurring joke aboout the halfling commoner who my rouge killed where for example the party met as the rouge was on his way to meet a friend who had a job for him he arrives at the stonehill inn where the wizard is staying they team up to kill some rats and in the privvy the halfling is hiding and the rouge kills hIm.
A week later said friend arrives in town and before assigning the job says "I had a chap to help you but ... Poor halfling, such terrible buisness"
Two sessions later a spy who lives in phandalin is ment to approach the party for help so my hook is theres a memorial for rat attack victems and sheds told "heres the adventuers i told yer about" any way she asks the rouge how he knew the halfling and he's vauge this goes on for a few minutes before she says "anyway i need your skill set" and that then opens up our quest
The wizard is a halfling too so he may be the BBEG if the rouge keeps doing things he doesn't like oh yeah the wizard is the dmpc lol
To preface, this is a god deceiving himself into believing him a king.
'You call me such horrid names. But I am no god. A god is nothing to a nonbeliever. I am the King of Rot, Sovereign of Decay, Father of Necromancy, but most of all...I am the Bringer of Death, Fatalos. And you will soon see the blight I will rid the world of..."
To preface, this is a god deceiving himself into believing him a king.
'You call me such horrid names. But I am no god. A god is nothing to a nonbeliever. I am the King of Rot, Sovereign of Decay, Father of Necromancy, but most of all...I am the Bringer of Death, Fatalos. And you will soon see the blight I will rid the world of..."
sounds like a line from an 80s fantasy novel or JRPG kind of fitting for dnd
Context, we were talking to the Horsemen of War and we were basically too weak at the time to actually do anything and my character (who is a Divination bunny with horrendous HP) tried to establish a sense of dominance by talking him down.
"Wisdom stems from patience, and patience from frustration. Anything you say or do to us will only make me smarter and your plan weaker"
Cut to a week later where literally when we gave up hope on stopping the actual war and clearing our names, my character had the biggest brain moment I've ever had in and out of character where I found a way to clear our names and help calm the war down. Just saying the b***h made her smarter so it was his fault.
Never got to deliver the lines, but it would have been an epic moment... Tez was our BBEG... Both Milosh and Raigor were party members.
Tez: "You should have been my ally. I still don't understand why you're working with these pious patsies. Our goals align. Join me; help me kill the rest of the gods, and I'll make you regent of any plane you choose."
Kat: "It's true. If you had come to me openly and in good faith before all of this started, I might have been your greatest disciple. Had you come to me with your plan even a year ago, I might have given it more than a passing thought, yet in the time since then you have done an injury to my honor, and that I can never forgive."
Tez: "What injury to your honor?"
Kat: "You stole from me."
Tez: "I never--"
Kat: "I know you will say that other hands did the deed. Your protestations fall on deaf ears. A malign intelligence has orchestrated all our suffering, and you were the architect of that plan."
Tez: "What is it I'm meant to have stolen?"
Kat: "You stole from me the chance to be reconciled with Kaia. With her death, I'll never know who she might have been when freed from your control."
Tez: "You'd have been disappointed."
Kat: "You stole Milosh's childhood from me."
Tez: "That insignificant bug?"
Kat: "Give me Raigor back, you son of a *****!"
"Sid Winterhall is Sid Winterhall in Sid Winterhall" - SerLoxy's amazing memos from a quest, many years ago.
To this day we still have absolutely no idea what I meant to write, but we laughed our a**es off then and everytime I stumble across the quote. It was actually some crucial bit of a information, like some big revelation, that is now forever lost. Even the DM couldn't decipher what the heck I wanted to mean by that. :P
Finland GMT/UTC +2
(Barbarian skewers Divine Soul Sorcerer with multiple javelins)
(Divine Soul Sorcerer uses their “Unearthly Recovery” ability to heal themselves; forcing the javelins out of their body, and they clatter to the ground)
Divine Soul Sorcerer: (fixes their red eyes on the Barbarian) “….MORE.”
Barbarian: “…I go the f*ck back inside!”
(runs back into tower from this terrifying wraith)
"You believe in Pelor, I believe in rock and roll. We've all got our things."
Nikolai Buckman | vampire | bard
Solace Redgrove | tiefling | bard
“Absolutely not you crusty musty man” my wizard counterspelling a lich
In an intrigue game, my bard and the inquisitive rogue (being the whole party) had been chasing down a mysterious figure with an "M" monogram which they embroidered into the coats of every one of their henchmen. We found a secret room at the Dean of the university's office, and found these coats in there. She then confronted us from the doorway with a gun, and reveals her name is Moriarty.
I realise we're screwed if we don't get past her, and we have no fighters or barbarians to do that. So, as a bard, I start talking.
Me: "It's all well and good, and I would applaud you were it not for the mistakes."
Moriarty: "...mistakes? I don't make mistakes."
Me: "well, somebody did. If I may?" *gestures to the hanging coats.*
DM as Moriarty, clearly curious where this is going, nods.
Me, picking up a coat. "Take this coat, for example." *steps closer as if to show her something* "With the M embroidered inside. Only a fool would let me get this close."
Me, to DM: "I throw the coat over her head and make a shove to knock her over, so we can run."
DM: "I... What? How did... I thought you were going to talk about the embroidered M! I did not see that coming! Yes, you absolutely dupe her into that! Make a contested strength check, with advantage!"
Make your Artificer work with any other class with 174 Multiclassing Feats for your Artificer Multiclass Character!
DM's Guild Releases on This Thread Or check them all out on DMs Guild!
DrivethruRPG Releases on This Thread - latest release: My Character is a Werewolf: balanced rules for Lycanthropy!
I have started discussing/reviewing 3rd party D&D content on Substack - stay tuned for semi-regular posts!
After being called to join in a brutal fight, initiated by a party member, a kobold PC says, "I told you this when we met. What part of 'I will not harm a dragon; all dragons are sacred,' did you not understand?"
STOP GIVING HIM IDEAS! (Referring to me, the DM.)
"You broke me, Scarlet. Broke me enough to break you." Peril from my recently ended WoF campaign.
"It's true that your friends may overwhelm me. Eventually. But not before I've torn your head off and used your skull for a chamber pot. So think carefully about whether or not you truly wish to 'start something', city dweller." My barbarian succeeding an Intimidate check.
Find your own truth, choose your enemies carefully, and never deal with a dragon.
"Canon" is what's factual to D&D lore. "Cannon" is what you're going to be shot with if you keep getting the word wrong.
Note: My PC had been separated from the party and our BBEG had cornered them and tried to convince them to join them.
Previously they had threw me off a roof.
DM (as Devas our BBEG): Your skills deserve for you to be apart of something so much more.
Me: Whispers: You threw me off a roof
Devas: What?
Me: You threw me...off a roof.
Devas: That does not answer my question will you join me?
Me: YOU THREW ME...OFF MY ROOF.
As I proceed to miss an attack and he pushes me off a roof.
Lore, Lore, and More! That's what I'm about!
PM me if you wish for some lore on a person or place!
Ha ha ha…YES!
More like Ha Ha...Ow.
Lore, Lore, and More! That's what I'm about!
PM me if you wish for some lore on a person or place!
My dmpc doesn't trust the rouge as he killed a halfling commoner for no reason(very in charicter tbh)
So when/if a conversation about trust comes up i'm going to work this in
"the only reason i'm giving you a chance is because I hear theres hounor among theives"
The dmpcs first line was when the rounge was battling rats at the inn "blimey what the bloody 'ells this racket i was tryna get some sleep ... Want a hand with them rats?"
The dead halfling is a recurring topic/joke now
My player wanted to dm so i let him rewrite the inn encounter but with hew pcs and his own dmpc but set it in the extended lore of the main campain
Dm(as we enter the room of said halfling murder) you find a halfling skeleton what do you do
Dwarf: Well nothing we can do(pause)he's dead let's go kill some orcs
in a hole in the ground you notice a halfling
Badass moment from yesterday's game.
Party were attacking ice giants, one was a homebrew monster called an Avalanche, which was so corrupted with cold that it was basically a walking glacier. It had an AC of 24.
The barbarian, with a strength of 20 and at level 12, so +9 to hit, failed to hit, for three turns in a row, with reckless attack and two attacks per turn.
On the fourth turn he was attacking, I said "Let's try to give you some luck," and asked what his character was doing, giving his character his full name. The other players started chanting his full name, and he rolled a nat 20 to hit, and killed the Avalanche (it was badly hurt from others already). He then ran to another giant who had just been thrown from a skyship by a t-rex, and everyone started chanting again. Second attack, also a nat 20! That giant also died, and then the skyship crashed into a hill and the combat was wrapped up.
It was very badass.
Make your Artificer work with any other class with 174 Multiclassing Feats for your Artificer Multiclass Character!
DM's Guild Releases on This Thread Or check them all out on DMs Guild!
DrivethruRPG Releases on This Thread - latest release: My Character is a Werewolf: balanced rules for Lycanthropy!
I have started discussing/reviewing 3rd party D&D content on Substack - stay tuned for semi-regular posts!
I have a recurring joke aboout the halfling commoner who my rouge killed where for example the party met as the rouge was on his way to meet a friend who had a job for him he arrives at the stonehill inn where the wizard is staying they team up to kill some rats and in the privvy the halfling is hiding and the rouge kills hIm.
A week later said friend arrives in town and before assigning the job says "I had a chap to help you but ... Poor halfling, such terrible buisness"
Two sessions later a spy who lives in phandalin is ment to approach the party for help so my hook is theres a memorial for rat attack victems and sheds told "heres the adventuers i told yer about" any way she asks the rouge how he knew the halfling and he's vauge this goes on for a few minutes before she says "anyway i need your skill set" and that then opens up our quest
The wizard is a halfling too so he may be the BBEG if the rouge keeps doing things he doesn't like oh yeah the wizard is the dmpc lol
in a hole in the ground you notice a halfling
To preface, this is a god deceiving himself into believing him a king.
'You call me such horrid names. But I am no god. A god is nothing to a nonbeliever. I am the King of Rot, Sovereign of Decay, Father of Necromancy, but most of all...I am the Bringer of Death, Fatalos. And you will soon see the blight I will rid the world of..."
sounds like a line from an 80s fantasy novel or JRPG kind of fitting for dnd
in a hole in the ground you notice a halfling
Guard is refusing to let the party into their destination:
Fighter: "Sir, my I ask your name?"
Guard: "Tyrell"
Fighter: "Goodbye Tyrell" Then swiftly pulls out knife a stabs the guard in the head from under his jaw.