Monstrous Compendium Vol. 1: Spelljammer Creatures
Frozen Sick
D&D Beyond Basic Rules
Basic Rules (2014)
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Monstrous Compendium Vol. 1: Spelljammer CreaturesFrozen SickD&D Beyond Basic RulesBasic Rules (2014)Sign in to view your library & saved favorites.
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"Only reason they jam up is because of fools who dont take care of them, besides ive got this just in case" *taps his concealed shortsword sending out a ring* "so whats your job in this town?"
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
"What's wrong, good sir? If you don't trust my wares, I strongly encourage you to test them rigorously! C'mon, science, magic, whatever it takes! My work is the real deal!"
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
"Ah, I'm afraid... wait a second... oh yes! I have some of those!" He produces a strange, clock-like device with a port for some sort of liquid. "Just feed it some of any of my patent medicines or some of my Rareheart oils and it'll lead you where you need to go! Just a word of advice, be specific. It's not very clever, but it is omniscient while powered. Now, I'll give you a free bottle of Reprieve Wine to go with it, since a gift without an ability to make it run is just a terrible gift!"
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
Kirin snorts and shrugs "I take out the trash."
𝔾𝕖𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕥𝕠𝕡 𝕤𝕙𝕖𝕝𝕗, 𝕕𝕠𝕦𝕓𝕝𝕖 𝕣𝕠𝕔𝕜𝕤, 𝕡𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕥𝕔𝕙
𝕀'𝕧𝕖 𝕞𝕚𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕥𝕦𝕟𝕖 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕦𝕞𝕓𝕝𝕖𝕣𝕤 𝕔𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘
𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕝 𝕞𝕖 𝕚𝕟, 𝕜𝕚𝕔𝕜 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕚𝕟 𝕦𝕡 𝕒 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕔𝕙
𝔻𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕚𝕟 𝕢𝕦𝕚𝕔𝕜𝕤𝕒𝕟𝕕'𝕤 𝕗𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕟 𝕤𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘
"I am quite fine, partner. Already got my fill of 'magic' and 'sceince'." He tips his hat.
𝔾𝕖𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕥𝕠𝕡 𝕤𝕙𝕖𝕝𝕗, 𝕕𝕠𝕦𝕓𝕝𝕖 𝕣𝕠𝕔𝕜𝕤, 𝕡𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕥𝕔𝕙
𝕀'𝕧𝕖 𝕞𝕚𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕥𝕦𝕟𝕖 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕦𝕞𝕓𝕝𝕖𝕣𝕤 𝕔𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘
𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕝 𝕞𝕖 𝕚𝕟, 𝕜𝕚𝕔𝕜 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕚𝕟 𝕦𝕡 𝕒 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕔𝕙
𝔻𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕚𝕟 𝕢𝕦𝕚𝕔𝕜𝕤𝕒𝕟𝕕'𝕤 𝕗𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕟 𝕤𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘
*hunteros walks up to the man* "you said the first one is free right? no money? I dont have to give you anything?"
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
"Well... I can't fault you there! I've got some natural oils and remedies too, if that floats your boat."
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
"Of course! I've got weapons, cures, magical items, whatever you can imagine!"
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
*Shows him his rifle magazine* I would like for this magazine to never run out of ammunition."
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
The man grins. He pulls something out of his back pocket. It looks like a small tank to be loaded into the gun where the magazine would normally go. Sloshing can be heard from inside.
"This rifle magazine generates special Rareheart Oil and forms it into exceedingly powerful bullets! If you ever run out, just come back to me and I will pay you for your loss of time reloading! A word of advice, don't do over 300 bullets per second. I'm not sure how you would do that, but you'd have to wait a couple of seconds for it to fill back up again."
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
"thank you, say I have a question. Does everything of yours work on rareheart oil, and are you the only one who makes it?"
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
"Rareheart oil, despite its name, is very common in the country of Greyland. You can do just about anything with it, so that's what I do! I don't know anyone else who sells it here, especially not for my low, low prices! Just 5 copper per bottle! It's like I'm giving it away, really!"
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
"okay" *he hands over two gold pieces* "four bottles please. Theres no catch to using this oil right? no fumes causing side effects or anything like that?"
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
"I'm afraid not. Like most men, I prefer medicine from a Doctor or Cleric, not the kind that other peddle to make a buck." He said and nodded apologetically "No offense."
𝔾𝕖𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕥𝕠𝕡 𝕤𝕙𝕖𝕝𝕗, 𝕕𝕠𝕦𝕓𝕝𝕖 𝕣𝕠𝕔𝕜𝕤, 𝕡𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕥𝕔𝕙
𝕀'𝕧𝕖 𝕞𝕚𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕥𝕦𝕟𝕖 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕦𝕞𝕓𝕝𝕖𝕣𝕤 𝕔𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘
𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕝 𝕞𝕖 𝕚𝕟, 𝕜𝕚𝕔𝕜 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕚𝕟 𝕦𝕡 𝕒 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕔𝕙
𝔻𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕚𝕟 𝕢𝕦𝕚𝕔𝕜𝕤𝕒𝕟𝕕'𝕤 𝕗𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕟 𝕤𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘
*open chars?*
psychopath ^-^
* What does that mean?*
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
"If you aren't satisfied, you will get your money back immediately! Also, this is worth forty bottles, that's right, FORTY bottles! Are you sure you wanna give a 'con man' like me any extra coin to mess with? I might invent something new while you're away!" He says, with a jokingly warning tone.
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
"well lets see if your inventions work" *proceeds to shoot 20 rounds at a tree with his 8 round magazine* "well thank you ill take them, again no side effects?"
I AM HOMICIDE I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF FIRE I AM STRENGTH AND POWER PRAISE LORD JEFF THE EVIL ROOOOOOOMMMBBBAAAAA
I AM PURE HATE! MY NAME IS BURDURXA SHADEMAKER! TREMBLE IN FEAR AT ITS MENTION!!!! PM ME THE WORD TOMATO OR I WILL SLAP YOUR FIRST BORN CHILD!!
MY VENOM SYMBIOTE: FFFFUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYY
He sighs. He speaks without that advertiser's cadence for once. "Honestly, I'd give this crap away for free if people would take it, but then everyone would be suspicious. But, no offense taken." He turns the volume back up. "I hope you have a lovely day sir! If you ever want some free healing or something like that, I'm gonna be here for a long time."
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels
"Death is a very common one, but that is a potential side effect that comes with any strong medication fired from a rifle at someone's head."
The audience chuckles a bit.
Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.
Awake, impure, divine
Breathgiver of the Strugels