Elf: Of course I'm against cannibalism. It's barbaric. Human: I've seen you eating an ork heart for a ritual. Elf: And I've seen you eating a pork roast. What's your point?
ZING!
(People still say, "Zing," when someone gets roasted. Right? ...or am I showing my age?)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
"Alright, you stole Gordon Ramsay's teeth, but only 12 of them!"
"I blocked the blow just because I'm a dragonborn with a pain fetish, it wasn't about you."
"Wait, we all let Ayayron fall down the cliff and you can cast Feather Falling?"
I’m sorry, but is one of your characters named “AyAyron”? That’s priceless
Yep. Ayayron, Tim the Enchanter, [REDACTED], God, and Polnareff.
Polnareff?
Yeah. Pretty sure it's some anime character's name
Isn't there a stereotype about every DND group having a uncreative weeb?, is there really any truth to that?
Definitely changes with your age group. The anime thing, not the creativity thing. There's always at least one person who can't express what happened in a game without using game rules or jargon terms.
Although, in older groups, that gets replaced by the guy who just doesn't understand offensive stereotypes are a thing. My wife's uncle is part of our regular group, and last time he was running he named the half orc cook npc 'Aunt Jemima'. Everyone else at the table promptly told him we aren't ever calling her that.
Elf: Of course I'm against cannibalism. It's barbaric. Human: I've seen you eating an ork heart for a ritual. Elf: And I've seen you eating a pork roast. What's your point?
ZING!
(People still say, "Zing," when someone gets roasted. Right? ...or am I showing my age?)
Now THATS a lot of damage
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Helper of Create a World thread/Sedge is Chaotic Neutral/ Mega Yahtzee High: 34, Low: 14/I speak English, je me parle le Francais, agus Labhraim beagan Gaeilge
DM: Okay, you guys see something moving in the distance. Druid: Is it [NPC who betrayed us and almost killed us]? Sorcerer: Why do you sound so excited?!
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Homebrew (Mostly Outdated):Magic Items,Monsters,Spells,Subclasses ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
Although, in older groups, that gets replaced by the guy who just doesn't understand offensive stereotypes are a thing. My wife's uncle is part of our regular group, and last time he was running he named the half orc cook npc 'Aunt Jemima'. Everyone else at the table promptly told him we aren't ever calling her that
Thanks for the response and someone should talk to your uncle-in-law, bro
"Alright, you stole Gordon Ramsay's teeth, but only 12 of them!"
"I blocked the blow just because I'm a dragonborn with a pain fetish, it wasn't about you."
"Wait, we all let Ayayron fall down the cliff and you can cast Feather Falling?"
I’m sorry, but is one of your characters named “AyAyron”? That’s priceless
Yep. Ayayron, Tim the Enchanter, [REDACTED], God, and Polnareff.
Polnareff?
Yeah. Pretty sure it's some anime character's name
Isn't there a stereotype about every DND group having a uncreative weeb?, is there really any truth to that?
Definitely changes with your age group. The anime thing, not the creativity thing. There's always at least one person who can't express what happened in a game without using game rules or jargon terms.
I saw a meme it was like, a normal party, and then there's this plagiarized anime character rogue and he says " I'm kirito uchiha elric, I steal the wizard's spellbook cuz' it's what my character would, and the normal-looking dragonborn fighter responds, " oh s**t it's this guy LOL
"OK, I missed the memo about the 5 Dragons apparently..."
"Guys? I ran out of dragon."
"I do flashy blue eyes like, yeah, uh-huh."
"Oh I'm sorry. Is your elbow in my way?"
"Player: I drop my pants.
Story Teller: She runs screaming.
Player: At me?"
"NPC: He's being very compliant.
PC: If you like that sort of thing."
"Why don't you leash these things before you try raising them from the dead?"
The group got into doing accents. One player, our artificer, decided he was going to sound German, specifically because he was an artificer. That was the logic. Anyway, at one point, while flustered, he came out with this bit of crazy: "ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und vatch das blinkenlights!!!"
Sorceress: (Finds a play that the bard's boyfriend was writing about the party's adventures) "I write down 'Carrots cause (Sorceress) to turn into a giant powerful monster who can only be defeated by (Sorceress' baby bulette)'"
NPC: "Here, wear these, they'll trap evil spirits."*Gives the party holly crowns*
Kenku Warlock: *Starts eating the holly berries*
NPC: "DON'T EAT THAT!!!"(grabs Warlock's holly crown and makes him spit the berries out)
Warlock: *Calls NPC a sh**head in halfling*
Halfling Bard: "No! We don't call people that!"
NPC: "Wait, what did he just say?"
Bard's Ghost Child: "Ohhhhhhhhhh! Raven's in trooouuble! And might possibly diiiieeee!"
Warlock: *Calls Ghost Child a sh**head in halfling*
Ghost Child: *Gasps* "MOOOOOM!"
Bard: "Both of you, stop it!"
NPC: "...So I take it that wasn't a very nice word?"
DM: (Collapsed on the floor laughing) "I CAN'T BELIEVE (SORCERESS) GOT A SUGAR MOMMY!"
DM: "(NPC) is a very good deterrent against doing anything frisky because you look over and there's just a scallop man sitting in a bathtub in the middle of the room."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Morrigan Corax, The Phantom Queen, Breaker of The Elemental Chains, and Flaming Chicken Cassilia Decalia, Servant of His Xanthous Majesty. "It's not narcissism, it's histrionicism, dearie." Dokuhebi Tsuchinoko, child of the serpent goddess and temporary mother of squidlings Envelope Lastname is going to be the death of me. I'm allergic to fireball
I did a pseudo-Asian setting for a campaign, and had two players, separately, ask me if their pseudodragon could be a little red oriental dragon that talks like Eddy Murphy. People like Mulan... well, the animated one...
Isn't there a stereotype about every DND group having a uncreative weeb?, is there really any truth to that?
Mystic v3 should be official, nuff said.
ZING!
(People still say, "Zing," when someone gets roasted. Right? ...or am I showing my age?)
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Definitely changes with your age group. The anime thing, not the creativity thing. There's always at least one person who can't express what happened in a game without using game rules or jargon terms.
Although, in older groups, that gets replaced by the guy who just doesn't understand offensive stereotypes are a thing. My wife's uncle is part of our regular group, and last time he was running he named the half orc cook npc 'Aunt Jemima'. Everyone else at the table promptly told him we aren't ever calling her that.
Can we return to the purpose of this thread?
Come participate in the Competition of the Finest Brews, Edition XXVIII?
My homebrew stuff:
Spells, Monsters, Magic Items, Feats, Subclasses.
I am an Archfey, but nobody seems to notice.
Extended Signature
"That was a waste of a perfectly good suicide pebble."
"I destroyed it! That's what suicide pebbles are for!"
RIP Tavern.
All hail King Jovan Fluffycloud Prince
Teleporting elf monk supremacy!, but druids are better
[Cactus]Waffles!”I don’t have any good quotes to put in my sig.” -Me
Now THATS a lot of damage
Helper of Create a World thread/Sedge is Chaotic Neutral/ Mega Yahtzee High: 34, Low: 14/I speak English, je me parle le Francais, agus Labhraim beagan Gaeilge
Dream of Days Lore Bard 9/Wizard 4 Baulder's Gate: Descent to Avernus (In Person/Over Zoom)
Saleadon Morgul Battle Smith Artificer 11 Tyranny of Dragons (In Person/Over Zoom)
Hurtharn Serpti Ghostslayer Blood Hunter 7 Spelljammer (Over Zoom)
Ex Sig
"Oh, he's just casting fire bolt, it's fine."
Come participate in the Competition of the Finest Brews, Edition XXVIII?
My homebrew stuff:
Spells, Monsters, Magic Items, Feats, Subclasses.
I am an Archfey, but nobody seems to notice.
Extended Signature
DM: Okay, you guys see something moving in the distance.
Druid: Is it [NPC who betrayed us and almost killed us]?
Sorcerer: Why do you sound so excited?!
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homebrew (Mostly Outdated): Magic Items, Monsters, Spells, Subclasses
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
Thanks for the response and someone should talk to your uncle-in-law, bro
Mystic v3 should be official, nuff said.
And then there's the one dude in the thread with an anime profile pic LOL
Mystic v3 should be official, nuff said.
I saw a meme it was like, a normal party, and then there's this plagiarized anime character rogue and he says " I'm kirito uchiha elric, I steal the wizard's spellbook cuz' it's what my character would, and the normal-looking dragonborn fighter responds, " oh s**t it's this guy LOL
Mystic v3 should be official, nuff said.
sorry to derail the thread for the second time LOL
Mystic v3 should be official, nuff said.
Well to get back on track-
"OK, I missed the memo about the 5 Dragons apparently..."
"Guys? I ran out of dragon."
"I do flashy blue eyes like, yeah, uh-huh."
"Oh I'm sorry. Is your elbow in my way?"
"Player: I drop my pants.
Story Teller: She runs screaming.
Player: At me?"
"NPC: He's being very compliant.
PC: If you like that sort of thing."
"Why don't you leash these things before you try raising them from the dead?"
The group got into doing accents. One player, our artificer, decided he was going to sound German, specifically because he was an artificer. That was the logic. Anyway, at one point, while flustered, he came out with this bit of crazy: "ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und vatch das blinkenlights!!!"
Sorceress: (Finds a play that the bard's boyfriend was writing about the party's adventures) "I write down 'Carrots cause (Sorceress) to turn into a giant powerful monster who can only be defeated by (Sorceress' baby bulette)'"
NPC: "Here, wear these, they'll trap evil spirits."*Gives the party holly crowns*
Kenku Warlock: *Starts eating the holly berries*
NPC: "DON'T EAT THAT!!!"(grabs Warlock's holly crown and makes him spit the berries out)
Warlock: *Calls NPC a sh**head in halfling*
Halfling Bard: "No! We don't call people that!"
NPC: "Wait, what did he just say?"
Bard's Ghost Child: "Ohhhhhhhhhh! Raven's in trooouuble! And might possibly diiiieeee!"
Warlock: *Calls Ghost Child a sh**head in halfling*
Ghost Child: *Gasps* "MOOOOOM!"
Bard: "Both of you, stop it!"
NPC: "...So I take it that wasn't a very nice word?"
DM: (Collapsed on the floor laughing) "I CAN'T BELIEVE (SORCERESS) GOT A SUGAR MOMMY!"
DM: "(NPC) is a very good deterrent against doing anything frisky because you look over and there's just a scallop man sitting in a bathtub in the middle of the room."
Morrigan Corax, The Phantom Queen, Breaker of The Elemental Chains, and Flaming Chicken
Cassilia Decalia, Servant of His Xanthous Majesty. "It's not narcissism, it's histrionicism, dearie."
Dokuhebi Tsuchinoko, child of the serpent goddess and temporary mother of squidlings
Envelope Lastname is going to be the death of me.
I'm allergic to fireball
"My familiar is Eddy Murphy"
I did a pseudo-Asian setting for a campaign, and had two players, separately, ask me if their pseudodragon could be a little red oriental dragon that talks like Eddy Murphy. People like Mulan... well, the animated one...
(after capturing some bandits posing as guards)
Rogue: "wait, Gavin promised you money to kill us?"
Bandit: "yeah."
Rogue: "but he hired us too! He promised us fifty gold, what did he promise you?"
Bandit: "uhh, about a hundred platinum to kill everyone and make it look like you turned on each other."
Rogue: "oh my gods, guys... do you know what this means?"
Paladin : "yeah, all this time, Gavin was the-"
Rouge: "Gavin was short changing us!"
(in a separate event two days later, where a cart of supplies got left on the road after the party got the owner arrested)
Monk: "maybe we should take the cart down to the village, let them use the supplies since they were kind to us."
Rogue: *currently going through the cart and shoving stuff in her bag.*: "you know that will count as stealing, right?"
I think I broke the like button on this comment...
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Ducks are just geese lite. Focus on the future. It'll become the past soon enough.
Istari and White Counsel in Club. Not the wish-granter of a thread.
Become a Plague Doctor today!
Join the Knights of the Random Table and Calius and Kothar Industries!
Homebrew: Artifact, Dungeon
May be offline due to school
lol
Current Character: https://www.dndbeyond.com/profile/MajestorSteel1103/characters/44226318
Leader of the Cult of ANTI-Sedge
Priest of the Supreme Court of Sauce as well as one of the three founders (others being GreatAxeblade and ParticleHex)