Quote from VitusW >>

An Indominus Rex comes along, creating an epic team-up between the legacy velociraptor and t-rex for the climax of the movie. And me, running along in high heels, am fine.

You're in a mansion after a dinosaur sale gone wrong and there's an Indoraptor chasing you through the home.

 Luckily, a velociraptor helps me drop it through the ceiling onto a spike, winning the fight and ending the movie.

you were riding a plane when a flying dinosaur decides to be a jerk and destroy it.

500 posts!

I used my animal handling skills to tame the Pteranodon and now have a flying dino mount!

You are a lowly goblin when an adventurer comes barreling at your while riding a Pteranodon.

I am the CEO of Jurassic Park.

I am the CEO of Jurassic Park.

so you die. he dies.

Quote from taliaswiftpoint >>

so you die. he dies.

You decided it was a good idea to go down Niagara Falls in a barrel

I'm riding in one of those indestructible barrels they use in The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug. 

You're a random orc alongside the river when suddenly a hobbit wearing a barrel as a suit of armor sticks out two axes and starts swinging.

I slip into the river and get swallowed by a whale who spits me out because I taste like an orc.

You're stuck in a web with a giant spider because a weird creature with dual-personality syndrome led you here because he's mad that you took his jewelry.

contrary to how the story normally goes, I cast fireball on the web, burning the spider alive, and I run back to the shire, and live out the rest of my days there.

the person who was supposed throw the one ring into Mordor just decided to go back home and do nothing about it, now all of middle earth is in peril, and your village is being attacked by orcs.

As he's walking out a goblinoid creature obsessed with getting that ring climbs on the person supposed to throw the ring into the fire. The goblinoid creatures loses his balance and slips into the fiery volcano, ring and all.

Quote from CandlekeeperofCastle >>

As he's walking out a goblinoid creature obsessed with getting that ring climbs on the person supposed to throw the ring into the fire. The goblinoid creatures loses his balance and slips into the fiery volcano, ring and all.

 (and what would the next challenge be?) 

Quote from Yondor_The_Fantastic >>

Quote from CandlekeeperofCastle >>

As he's walking out a goblinoid creature obsessed with getting that ring climbs on the person supposed to throw the ring into the fire. The goblinoid creatures loses his balance and slips into the fiery volcano, ring and all.

 (and what would the next challenge be?) 

 you are that goblin.

The fiery volcano gets put out by an old wizard in a grey cloak at the last second.

i just got shot by three giant arrows

I am a tarresque. They are like splinters.

You just shot a tarresque with 3 giant arrows.

From my airship. I fly away. 

You are a pigeon that just got hit by a fast-moving airship. 

You walked through the portal to CartoonLand, and I just attack the camera.

You are a wildlife cameraman who was just attacked by a pigeon and is now rapidly descending into a mountain.

Luckily, the ceiling collapses behind me, keeping the pigeon away, and after a few hours of wandering, I find my way out.

you just dropped the players handbook on your toe

From 1 millimeter above it.

 You are a lone level 1 character who mistook a mimic for a chair.

Quote from UndauntedDM >>

From 1 millimeter above it.

 You are a lone level 1 character who mistook a mimic for a chair.

 *For old times sake*

I call out, and a Tabaxi made of yarn swings in and scratches the mimic to death.

You're Jhon the Tabaxi, and you are being attacked by the mimics retrieval team, and the whole retrieval team is just a bunch of mimics.

I'm Jhon the Tabaxi. 

You are the retrieval team. 

Due to Jhon the Tabaxi's long slumber he is out of practice and weak. He falls swiftly into our bellies. 

You just defeated a dragon and decided to take a high dive into the dragon's pile of gold and swim in it like Scrooge McDuck. But your DM plays by real world phyics and so you just jumped 500 ft into a pile of hard metal.