Granted! But it's broken and doesn't work.

I wish that someone would buy me the subclasses in the player handbook, in real life, and not as a made-up thing in a game thread.

But seriously, somebody buy me some subclasses. Please? PLEASE???

Quote from WilliamOThewisps >>

Maybe Otter is fine with the burnt, baby peacock earring, he didn't specify.

 They or Aer pls

Quote from KingOrc >>

Granted! But it's broken and doesn't work.

I wish that someone would buy me the subclasses in the player handbook, in real life, and not as a made-up thing in a game thread.

But seriously, somebody buy me some subclasses. Please? PLEASE???

 Granted, but the purchase doesn't go through. The person's credit card declined.

I wish I could be more active on this site

Granted. Unfortunately, doing any type of physical activities on the servers of https://www.dndbeyond.com breaks it.

I wish to touch grass.

Granted, but you can only touch it in a simulation >:)

I wish we all lived in a simulation

Quote from timededge >>

Granted, but you can only touch it in a simulation >:)

I wish we all lived in a simulation

 Granted… but a glitch in the matrix deletes you 3 seconds afterward

I wish for anything ever to happen or not

Granted. Good job, buddy, you just created a paradox. Now everything that could possibly be happening is happening...but also not happening? Weird.

I wish I knew how to fix a paradox

Granted. Buy guerrilla glue today! Fix all problems!

-15/11 sin 48 degrees= x sin 98 degrees

x% off!

I wish snow would be around me

Granted. Have fun being trapped in a large pile of snow!

I wish that someone or something procrastinates the inevitable heat death of the universe

Granted. Unfortunately, the somewhere community gets angry and tells the someone and something community to ignore your plea.

I wish to be a tree that can perform magic

granted. your body spontainiasly combusts and a tiny tree sapling apears on the ground. you grow like a normal tree taking forever to get to your full size. you can not move and can only grant magic to other people and you cant get yourself out of being a tree.

I wish for 5 star meals for the rest of my life.

Granted! 5 burning, flaming stars crash into your home, and stay there, waiting to be eaten. And if you ever try to eat anything else, the food disappears. 

I wish you could eat stars. 

Granted, but they are super hot and they melt you from the inside out.

I wish to be as powerful as Cthulhu.

Granted, but dogs want to eat you. 

I wish I could communicate with my dog and know exactly what she was thinking or trying to say. 

Granted, you learn some very disturbing things, such as: Your dog doesn’t love you, your dog will eat you when you die, your dog will devour your soul, you dog is quite hungry, ball.

I wish my black cat actually loved me :(

Granted. They now follow you around and cause bad things to happen wherever you go unless you make the choice to put them down or put them up for adoption.

I wish black cats weren't unlucky

Granted! But they technically never were unlucky or lucky based on the actual logic of his the universe works. To make them not unlucky, we had to first make them unlucky, and a black cat ate you in that time.

I wish more people would by ragdoll cat breeds.

Granted! Suddenly, ragdoll replicas of various cat breeds start selling out extremely quickly.

I wish I could make the ideas in my head reality

Granted! You subconsciously imagine your death...

I wish you hadn't died

Granted! @timededge your wish is as if it never took place

I wish for a sandwich