Vagineer

Great Weapon Master. On Vagineer's turn, when he scores a critical hit with a melee weapon or reduce a creature to 0 HP with one, he can make one melee weapon attack as a bonus action. Before he makes a melee attack with a heavy weapon that he is proficient with, he can choose to take a -3 penalty to the attack roll to add +6 to the attack's damage.

Great Weapon Fighting. Vagineer can reroll a 1 or 2 on damage dice with melee weapons wielded with two hands.

Dwarven Fortitude. Whenever Vagineer takes the Dodge action in combat, he can spend one Hit Die to heal himself for the die's total plus his CON modifier (+3).

Dwarven Resilience. Groin has advantage on saves against poison and resistance against poison damage.

Divine Health. Immune to disease.

Divine Smite. When Groin hits with a melee weapon attack, he can expend one spell slot to deal 2d8 extra radiant damage to the target plus 1d8 for each spell level higher than 1st (max 5d8) and plus 1d8 against undead or fiends (max 6d8 total).

Aura of Protection. While Groin is conscious, he grants all friendly creatures (including himself) within 10 ft. a +3 bonus to all saving throws.

Spellcasting. Groin is an 8th-level spellcaster. Its spellcasting ability is Charisma (spell save DC 14, +6 to hit with spell attacks). It has the following paladin spells prepared:

1st level (4 slots): compelled duel, command, cure wounds, thunderous smite, shield of faith

2nd level (3 slots): aid, find steed, warding bond, zone of truth

Multiattack. Groin makes two attacks with Unholy Cleaver.

Unholy Cleaver (5 Charges). Melee Weapon Attack: +10; to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit:  13(1d8+9) slashing damage.

Charge Effects. One Charge is added on for every kill made. In addition, rolls to hit that are 19 or 20 add a single charge.

• Wormhole Rift. As a bonus action, Groin can cut a rift into the fabric of space. Walking through it will teleport you for 30X ft. per charge expended.
• Added Gravity. Whenever an attack is successfully landed Groin can addon 1d8 force damage per charge expended.
• Matter Shift. When Groin rolls to hit he can add +1 per charge expended.

Channel Divinity.

• Sacred Weapon. Groin can imbue one weapon that he is holding with positive energy. For 1 minute, the weapon is considered magical, he adds +5 to attack rolls, and it emits bright light for 20 ft. and dim light for 20 ft beyond that. He can end the effect as part of any other action, if he is no longer holding the weapon, or if he falls unconscious.
• Turn the Unholy. Each fiend or undead that Groin can see or hear him within 30 ft. must make a WIS saving throw (DC 16). On failure, it is turned for 1 minute or until it takes damage.

Lay on Hands. Groin has a pool of healing power that can restore 40 HP per long rest. As an action, he can touch a creature to restore any number of HP remaining in the pool, or 5 HP to either cure a disease or neutralize a poison affecting the creature.

Divine Sense (4/Long Rest). Vagineer can detect good and evil. Until the end of his next turn, he can sense anything affected by the hallow spell or know the location of any celestial, fiend, undead within 60 ft. that is not behind total cover.

Harness Divine Power (2/Long Rest). Vagineer can expend a use of his Channel Divinity to fuel his spells. As a bonus action, he touches his holy symbol, utters a prayer, and regains one expended spell slot, which can be no higher than level 2.

Channel Divinity.

Champion Challenge. Each creature of Vagineer's choice within 30 ft. must make a WIS saving throw (DC 14) or it can't willingly move more than 30 ft. away from him.

Turn the Tide. Each creature of Vagineer's choice within 30 ft. regains 1d6 +3 HP if it has no more than half its max HP.

Divine Allegiance. When a creature within 5 ft. of Vagineer takes damage, he can use his reaction to take the damage himself instead. This damage to him can’t be reduced or prevented in any way.