Small unknown, Chaotic Evil
AC 22 Bully's Untouchability    Initiative +14 (24)
HP 3500 (175d20)
Speed 35 ft., Fly 40 ft.
Mod Save
STR 2 −4 +0
DEX 20 +5 +9
CON 4 −3 +1
Mod Save
INT 21 +5 +9
WIS 2 −4 +0
CHA 22 +6 +20
Skills Acrobatics +14, Deception +16, Perception +6, Performance +15, Stealth +12
Resistances All damage from spells except Thunder damage
Immunities Charmed, Exhaustion
Senses Unknown She can sense your growing frustration; Passive Perception 14
Languages None
CR 9 (XP 5,000; PB +4)
Traits

Disgusting. Unarmed Strikes have disadvantage against Britney.

Creepy. If the party is in an area with Britney, no one can leave that 400 x 400 ft area until Britney is defeated.

Idol. All monsters with a wisdom or intelligence score lower than 10 are simps for Britney.

Social (non) Distancing. Any creature who breathes air within 5 ft of Britney gets the poisoned and stunned conditions.

Angel's Looks, Devil's Personality. All creatures fighting Britney have disadvantage in saving throws against being charmed by her.

Sleeptalker. Britney can use spells with verbal components while unconscious.

Getting to Their Heads. Britney can stack the effects of spells cast with her charisma modifier.

Resting B***h Face. Britney never loses concentration on debuff spells unless she concentrates on another spell. She can stack the same spell, however.

Harvest. Britney recovers a first level spell slot every time she does damage to a creature.

Spellcasting. Britney is a 2nd level spellcaster. Her spellcasting ability is [Charisma] (spell save DC 19, +22 to hit with spell attacks). Britney has following Bard spells prepared:
Cantrips (at will): [Vicious Mockery], [Friends]

1st level (20 slots): [Charm Person], [Bane]

2nd level (10 slots): [Suggestion]

Legendary Resistance. Twice a round when Britney fails a saving throw, she may succeed instead.

Actions

Britney has 2 attacks, which can be spread in any way.

Bully's Untouchability. Area of Effect Attack: DC 16, 60 ft radius from Britney, On Saving Throw Failure: 1 force damage, disadvantage on all attack rolls and saving throws, and incoming attacks against the affected creature have advantage.

Fake Fingernail Scratch. Melee Weapon Attack: +10 to hit, reach 5 ft., 2 target. Hit: (1) [slashing] damage. Blinds creatures on hit.

Epic Queen Beam. Ranged Magic Attack: +16 to hit, range 7/200 ft., 2 target. Hit: 1 [radiant] damage. Hit creatures are incapacitated for their next turn.

”Beautiful Smile”. Area of Effect Magic Attack: DC 18 (CON saving throw), affects all creatures currently watching. Upon Save Fail: creatures who fail the save are so disgusted that they gain disadvantage on all attack rolls and ability checks.

Bonus Actions

Lob. If Britney is near a monster or player character that is large or smaller, she may move them up to 40 ft in any direction, just not through obstacles.

Reactions

Randomize. Britney is so stupid that the attacker questions their entire existence. They now have to roll their attack with no bonuses. It can sometimes hit random places too. This is done in exchange for 50 of Britney's hit points. This ability also lowers a saving throw DC down to 10.

Legendary Actions

Britney can use 3 legendary actions (resets after Britney takes damage).

Substitute (Costs 1 Action). Britney secretly teleports to a place in the area she is trapped with the party members in of her choosing, leaving a doppelgänger that has all the same abilities as Britney and 100 health behind in exchange for 10 hit points. Upon dying, the doppelgänger explodes and blinds everything within 10 ft of it. Doppelgängers cannot use legendary or mythic actions.

Tantrum. (Costs 2 actions). Britney summons a total of 5 CR 3 monsters that do her bidding.

Mythic Actions

Britney has 1 mythic action, which comes into effect only after her health reaches 0.

I'm Back. Britney is back. But wait, there is more. Her action economy and legendary actions have both doubled. Now Britney has 4 attacks and 4 legendary actions. She has become even worse. Also, her health comes back to full, and all spell slots are refilled.

Description

This is Britney. She is fake, uninteresting, ugly, and stupid. But most of all, she is annoying. She is weak as hell, but who cares. She can make any fight last forever! I have attempted to create the most annoying entity in DND 5e. To do so, I have made sure that Britney is really tough to kill, so I gave her a ton of health. That is the first step. However, what most do not understand is that if one is to make an annoying creature, it must still have the party invested in the game. For instance, anyone can create a TPK encounter, but Britney is just here to waste your time. That is why her damage is so low and her debuffs are so ridiculous. What really makes her annoying is the Dance Beam, Randomize, Substitute, and I'm Back. Dance beam skips turns, can be used to stun 4 people max, if they are clumped together, and has a range of 200 ft and a super high hit bonus as well. When the mythic action occurs and this attack can be used 4 times instead of 2, it gets even worse. She also can charm party members with her spell selection mid fight, due to one of her traits. This makes her a force to be reckoned with, and even more annoying. Substitute is a broken ability, and I had to balance it a little to make sure that it was not unbeatable, as this ability is close to straight up invincibility unless the party improvises. I did not want her to heal, as that would be unfair. Why am I bringing up fairness? Because if it is unbeatable, then there is no point in fighting it, and it just makes people despair. This, however, especially with an outside time limit, makes this really stressful and annoying, especially since this monster has to be beaten, but is like an endless swarm of mosquitos, which you would rather walk away from. However, I have trapped them with her. Back to substitute though, this substitute can use all of Britney's abilities aside from legendary and mythic actions, so it is near indistinguishable from the real one (however, it can still be identified). Randomize makes it that much more annoying. It is like silvery barbs but way worse. Finally, what is worse than one annoying fight? One that is even worse, as Britney now has 2 actions instead of one. I also gave her some really awful proficiencies and a flight speed as well as legendary resistances to just make this worse. Finally, you may have noticed how little damage Britney does. That is to let players know that she is there solely to waste their time, and would have a hard time actually killing them. I encourage you all to test this menace out with your parties. Peace!

Previous Versions

Name Date Modified Views Adds Version Actions
8/6/2025 9:23:50 PM
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1
1
Coming Soon
8/12/2025 8:19:28 PM
3
1
1.5
Coming Soon

Habitat: Any

ElPadre1

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