Jumper. "Princess Biscuits" jump distance is determined using his Dexterity rather than his Strength.

Wily "Princess Biscuits" has an uncanny knack of surviving when he shouldn't. If damage would reduce his hit points to 0, make a constitution saving throw (DC10) to remain on 1 hit point. The DC increases by 3 each time this ability is used. Additionally, "Princess Biscuits" has advantage on death saving throws.

Poor depth perception "Princess Biscuits" has disadvantage on athletics and acrobatics checks involving judging distances.

Hard of hearing "Princess Biscuits" has disadvantage on perception checks involving hearing.

Scratch. Melee Attack Roll: +5, reach 5 ft. Hit: 1 Slashing damage.

Strangely intimidating. "Princess Biscuits" can use the altered eyes or booming voice traits of Thaumaturgy

UNLOCKABLE: Gift of the Abyssal one (1/day). "Princess Biscuits" may cast Infestation (DC15)

Pick at scabs "Princess Biscuits" scratches at a perpetually infected scab, taking 1 point of piercing damage. For the next minute his attacks deal an additional 1 point of poison damage if targets fail a constitution saving throw (DC12).

Feign death Upon being hit by am attack or otherwise taking damage, "Princess Biscuits" may feign death, in pathetic fashion, preventing him from being targeted by attacks from all creatures within sight of "Princess Biscuits" unless they succeed on a wisdom saving throw (DC14). Feign death ends when "Princess Biscuits" moves or takes another action.