Ranari shakes her head. "Not the one in Hillcorn. The Inspired are finishing the construction of one at the edge of the Shanjueed Jungle-about two miles away. We think it's close enough that they'll try a foray there soon with additional power granted by the monolith. In two weeks, the Inspired will be finished and the rearguard they leave will depart. So we're giving you two weeks to prepare however you want and get across the border to meet with the rest of your team. Which brings me to the next part of this. Druhdaar will indeed be joining you, and you'll also be working with two other guides who have spent several months in Riedra observing the area. They'll have better information, but they've given us basic maps of the area and the location you'll be meeting them. As for getting to the meeting spot, I would recommend using the psionic portal system to get wherever you need to go for supplies, then use it to get to Tashalatora and go through the pass from there. It's only half a day's trek to the rendezvous from there."
Taran stills as Trailblazer Ranari talks. He imagines the forces of Riedra forcing their way through Shanjueed, of them seiging Tashalatora. Of Sim, caught in the path of that devastation, medical kit in hand as she runs from soldiers with dead eyes and crimson swords.
Then his thoughts turn to fire and death, before he forces himself to calm down and focus. They would die later, now he had to plan.
"T-T-Trailblazer, um, h-how d-d-do we d-destroy a hanbanali ? Ar-aren't they, well, n-nearly in-destructible?"
Taran blushes and lowers his head in shame, "And, um, well..." his voice catches, recriminations for his earlier folly's tearing at him, he should have known instead of doing what he did, "I-I al-already u-used all th-the funds y-you provided before... I-I'm s-sorry. I... I should have known something l-like this would c-come up. If I'm going to protect her, them, the people of Tashalatora... I w-would s-s-selfishly ask f-for further funds... I-I'm so sorry..."
Ranari nods. "Regarding the monolith. They're difficult to destroy, but a few things can do it. One, bonding with it psionically and setting it to self-destruct, which is taxing and dangerous, but gives you a little more control over the explosion. Two, dealing enough damage that it explodes almost immediately, giving you less time to get away but is less difficult. Three, overwhelming the core with power so that it self-destructs, which is also a more imminent explosion. The other two guides will likely have suggestions on the best way to bring down this one. And naturally you'll all be provided with funds, not to worry Taran. We understand this is a difficult mission that will require resources and purchases. We don't expect you to hoard your money against future crises, but rather prepare for the missions you have now."
"Alright, how will we know the names and verify the identity of the agents we're going to be in contact with?" Juhaan asks flipping his hat on his hands.
Ranari nods. "The guides will be at the rendezvous point all day in two weeks. It will follow a similar procedure to the rendezvous point you set up with the refugees, but the roles will be flipped this time. Your code word will be Ancient, and the one they'll give you will be Birth. I won't be giving you physical descriptions in case something happens during the interim between now and you meeting them, but one of them is named Sirkashtai and the other goes by Diamond. They've both been briefed on your names only as well, and will wait for you to initiate the code exchange."
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
Ranari stands. "All right, if there's nothing else you're dismissed. You have the next two weeks to prepare as you wish, just make sure you're at the rendezvous point in fourteen days." She hands you each a bag. "Two hundred gold each to prepare and buy stores. Good luck." Her eyes are serious. "This will be difficult, and potentially deadly. Listen to your teammates, work together, and deal a blow to the Inspired. Anyone who wishes to speak with me in private can of course do so now. May the Light guide your paths."
OOC: Okay. Ash is coming back on the 5th. You guys have until Sunday to prepare, unless you end up finishing early. Unless there are objections, I'll start Sunday with you approaching the rendezvous site with the other guides. Good luck!
Vishal, after his and Taran's private meeting with the Trailblazer, spots Taran heading back towards room. The young Road members eyes looking vacant and cried out. He was going to say something else but upon seeing Taran in this state says, "Taran. What's wrong?" Concern clear in his voice. Taran stops and turns, seeing Vishal. He straightens up and tries to pull himself together."Uh, um, Esteemed, I mean, Sir, I mean, V-v-Vishal, um...It's, um.... I'm s-sorry, I w-was... D-d-did you need something, Sir, I mean Vishal?"“Taran.” Vishal says sincerely and then realizing we’re in public he says, “Why don’t you come to my room?”"O-oh, um, okay?" he says, blinking a bit, but following Esteemed Vishal back to his room.
Taking him back to his room Vishal closes the door behind him and then sits on his bed. Lightly patting the spot next to him he says, “Sit down. You can relax.” Taran sits, though relaxed is far from what you could call it. "Um, d-d-did you need something? I-I w-was, well, I pr-probably was, going to st-start, um, selling the Riedran's eq-equipment and buying supplies... there's..." he chokes up a second, "th-there's a lot..."Vishal looks at Taran’s eyes and says, “What the matter? You’re obviously upset and have been crying. You were really fidgety in the meeting with Ranari. Please, tell me what’s the matter.”
"I-um, I,"Taran breaks eye contact, "I-I w-wouldn't even know where to s-s-start, and I-I don't w-w-want to bother you. Tr-Trailblazer Ra-Ranari is, sh-she already w-wants to l-let me t-take up her time, I-I don't want to t-take up yours too...I-I'll be a-a-able to do the m-m-mission. For her, for her a-at least, I w-w-won't l-let myself stop. N-not even if it k-kills me too."“Taran.” Vishal replies as he reaches out and grabs his hand, “I’m not asking if you’re okay because of the mission. The mission means nothing to me compared to you. I told you last time, we’re friends. And my friend is really upset right now. And I don’t know why or how to help because you’re leaving me in the dark. Don’t leave me in the dark Taran. Let me be a good friend and help. Please.” Taran shakes, trying to hold back the sobs. "Y-you can't... I-I don't even know... I don't know wh-what's bad or good or right or wrong, it's all gone, there's... I'm d-drowning in it... th-the one thing, the one thing I know is right, that I know I need to do... I need to protect Tashalatora... I n-need to pr-protect Sim... e-e-even if I'm a monster, that is right, that's good"
Vishal gently squeezes Taran's hand to let him know he's there for him, "Protecting those you hold dear is good Taran. But....you don't have to loose yourself, loose your humanity while you do it. That's the number one thing that separates us from the Inspired. Humanity. We haven't lost it. We still see the people as people and care for them. We still want to help them and....not kill everyone if we can. The Inspired don't care about that. They'll go through every human they can if that means the cycle never continues.""I d-don't know if I am human..." Taran says quietly. He squeezes Vishal's hand, when he starts talking, his voice is different, emotionless, "Non-dominant hand, dagger sheath on dominant side, flip and pull, off-balance you'll turn as you fall, I'll drive the dagger into your throat. Or twist and gut, surprise slows you down, pain stuns you, finish you before you think to heal yourself." He points to the door, hand rocksteady, "Someone bursts in, fire is most distracting, creates barrier, vial of alchemist fire in an underhand toss, even if I miss creates a barrier. flip over bed, pulling you with me, crossbow out and loaded within six seconds, bed provides cover, fire as enemies pour through. " His hand starts to shake, and Taran comes back, his voice normal, "He-he tr-trained me. B-but it was a lie. I killed people, I've thought about killing everyone, every room I look for exits and entrances, I hurt the Trailblazer in sparring, because I-I d-don't even know what normal sparring is like." His arm drops, "Ev-everything is a lie and he's dead and I d-don't know if I should h-h-hate him or cry for him or... anything. I-I-I don't know..."
"Taran..." Vishal says, showing a lot of worry and concern, "You are human. He may have trained you. He may have taught you to think everyone is an enemy. Of what to do if I turn on you, or we're suddenly ambushed here, or any other manner of unspeakable things. But he is not you, Taran. He may have taught you everything he knew, but not everything you know. You are your own person. You can make your own choices. Its your choice how you're going to live your life, what you're going to do, how you're going to implement his training."Looking at him Vishal then pulls his friend into a hug and says, "It's okay to be angry, its okay to cry, I'm here for you. So you can let it all out. Just....remember that you are you, not him." Taran is limp in Vishal's arms, tears all cried out earlier. "B-but I don't know what to do." his voice is quiet Father... Father taught me everything, I didn't even suspect... I didn't even think it was odd, not until Mister Lanaan did sparring so differently... and then the Trailblazer was doing a c-class... And e-e-even then, I th-thought, it was j-just different, j-just a d-different type of training..." He starts shaking again, "N-now... now he's d-d-d-d-dead, my... Sim is in d-danger, and ev-everything is a lie, or it isn't and... I'm so c-confused... how... how could so much change so quickly."
Vishal tightly squeezes as he continues to hug Taran, "I won't say I know exactly what you're going through Taran."Vishal says sincerely, "I don't. All I know is that you need a friend. A rock. And I'm here for you. I know things are so very confusing. And I'll do my best to try and help you get through it. The confusion, the changes, everything. Because that's what friends do." Vishal then chuckles as he says, "Do you think this is how the refugees feel? So very confused with everything changing around them." "Maybe...pr-probably..." Vishal is still tightly hugging Taran, not letting go until he does, "Well....I may not be the best at it but I will be here for you as long as you need me. I'll just have to do my work here." "N-n-no," Taran says, pushing back against Vishal, "Y-you have things to d-d-do, you need to go do them. I'll... Trailblazer R-Ranari is meeting with me. I d-d-don't want to keep you, you s-s-said you were going home right? Th-that's, you should do th-that.. don't... don't w-worry about me...""I can do my work here." Vishal replies letting Taran goes as he pushes back, "It's probably better. It'll keep me from running to Dulamul. Besides....what kind of friend would I be if I left you."
"I-I-I d-don't know"Taran says standing up, "Are-are th-there different types? B-b-but that d-d-doesn't matter. You, you should go, see y-your f-f-family. I-I'll k-keep busy... I n-n-need to d-do sh-shifts at the m-m-medical ward, and Tr-trailblazer Ranari s-said to meet her f-for sp-special tr-training, and I n-need to m-make supplies and find reagents and . and you have your own s-stuff to d-do... I'd... w-w-wouldn't I b-be a bad f-f-friend f-f-for t-taking up your time? ""Not if I'm freely giving it to you." Vishal replies wisely. He then shrugs and says, "You know....you can always come with me. A change of scenery might be good. I'm sure my parents would be happy to have you." "I'm, um, I'm s-s-supposed to meet with Tr-trailblazer Ranari..." Taran said, "e-e-everyday, I think, I... um, I know the p-portals are qu-quick but... that might be too much. I'll... here will b-b-be the same as there...f-f-for me..." he shrugs. Then he looks at Vishal, thinking of a way to change the topic, "Y-y-you n-never answered m-me... you were, you were looking for me, right? D-d-do you need me t-t-to make you s-something else? I don-don't think you w-w-would have run out of soap yet... um, d-d-did something c-c-come up?"
Vishal sighs as he gives into the topic changes, "I need your measurements actually."Taran blinks. "Wh-what sort of m-measurements?""Legs, chest, waist, shoulders, the whole shebang." Vishal replies. "I-I th-thought, y-you weren't m-making me armor, a-after I..." he gestures to the still relatively new Studded Leather. A set of armor Vishal might realize he has yet to see Taran take off. Vishal blushes as he puts his hands behind his head and said, "Well I got hit by some inspiration while waiting on out last mission so.....slight change of plans.""Oh, um, o-okay." Taran looks around the room, "Um, here?""All my tools do so are in here so that'd be preferred. I just need you to strip down so I can get some accurate readings." Taran shrugs, and starts taking off his armor. Revealing the stained and torn underclothes that are almost more of a collection of sewn together rags than actual clothing. Rags that likely had been thrown out for getting too torn up. Including leggings that sort of just stop around his knees. Taran makes sure to fold and stack his armor neatly off to the side, and turns to look at Vishal "U-um, wh-where do you w-want me to s-stand?"
“Over there is fine.”Vishal replies as he points to the middle of the room and gets his measuring tape and some paper and ink ready, not really paying attention to Taran. Taran moves to stand over there. As Taran turns around and Vishal turns to face himVishal’s face turns completely red as he says, “Taran. You’re....ummm....well....I can see your whole butt.” "Oh, s-s-sorry" Taran says looking down at the strip of cloth. "I'll t-try to f-find time to p-patch it up." Vishal a little distracted says, “Yeah. Ummm....how about I take you clothes shopping. We can do it while selling the other things.”"Um," Taran fidgets a bit, "w-wouldn't th-that be a waste? I-I s-still have some fishing l-line, it, um, it should hold up b-better th-than the thread did." Vishal shakes his head and composes himself before he goes to Taran’s front and starts measuring from there, “I think it’s time for new clothes. I know a nice shop let me take you.”
"B-but, I-I have clothes, an-and I c-can sew th-these up a little more, w-we sh-should save our money, f-for the mission, and for supplies. Medicines, that s-sort of thing" As Vishal begins measuring, he likely notices the scars, dozens of them, along Taran's back and shoulders. The one on his chest is huge, a white line stretched across his entire chest, while others look like knots, whorls and spots from punctures. Vishal does his best not to stare at the scars and doesn’t make any remarks about them as he says, “Taran. New clothes will make you feel nice. Trust me. You’re lucky I’m not dragging you to the baths as well. Now there’s no arguing with me on this one. I’ll let you win not having me glued to your side. But you’re not winning this. We’re getting you new clothes.”"I-I d-don't need to feel nice, Vishal," Taran says, "It-it's more important to m-make sure we have the th-things we need. So that e-everyone else m-makes it back a-alive from the mission."
“Taran. Everyone will be fine. I believe in your skills and mine. Plus it’ll cost like a gold maybe two. We’re getting you new clothes. You don’t need to live like you’re fighting to survive everyday.”"T-t-t-two gold?" Taran's eyes go huge, "on c-clothes? V-Vishal, sir, th-that's f-far to much, I th-thought a few silver, maybe, I-I can't spend that m-much on something like that. Th-that's c-crazy, I'll j-just patch this up, it, it isn't a b-big deal."“Two gold is nothing.” Vishal replies as he continues to take measurements. “And I already said I’m doing it and there’s no arguing out of it. You can either come with me to help pick out. Or I’ll pick them out myself, put them in your room, and then steal your old clothes and burn them so you have to wear the new stuff.” "You-you wouldn't" Taran says, "Vishal, two g-g-gold is almost two weeks wages for m-most people. I-you-I c-c-can't let you sp-spend that k-kind of money on me, it-it wouldn't be right and"he's clutching at straws, desperate to find something to prevent this, "and, s-s-something that nice, it'd, it'd just g-get ruined under my armor. Two Gold on something th-that'd j-just g-get ruined. Vishal, th-that's insane." “Well I guess I’m insane. And I’m going to do it. The clothes will be fine on you. Trust me.”"I-I do trust you, b-but..." Taran trails off, not sure what to say to change Vishal's mind.
“Good. We can stop after selling things.” Vishal replies as he finishes the measurements. He then blushes as he adds, “If it makes you feel better it can be considered something for the team in a weird way.” He then laughs nervously as he says, “You’re totally my type Taran. If we weren’t on a team I’d probably be flirting a lot with you. And now I’m going to be distracted knowing I can catch a sneak peak below the armor in your current clothes. And new clothes will let me know I can’t catch a peak.” "Oh, um, o-okay"Taran says clearly confused, "I'll... put on my armor, then." Vishal chuckles nervously as he adds, “Sorry. I...umm...yeah. I hope that knowledge doesn’t change anything.”"N-no, we sh-should be serious on missions, and always pr-prepared. So, I get why flirting is out. I'm not s-sure what you would be peeking at, but... if it's a problem... I'm sorry I-I didn't f-fix it before." Taran shrugs into the chest piece of his armor. "I-I'm not sure what type is, people say it sometimes about beautiful people or strong p-people, but, I-I'm not like that, s-so, if y-you were g-giving me a c-compliment, thank you?"
Vishal blushes some more as he explains, “Your butt. I would be attempting to get peaks at that. And yes it was a complement.” He then goes on to explain, “I mean....being physically attractive is a perk but it’s not what draws me in. It’s your quietness. Your kindness. Your inner strength. You’re really strong Taran. Maybe not as physically as other and you look down at your skills. But that’s not what matters are attracts me. It’s the quiet confidence to do what has to be done. To put others first. To always be kind and generous. That’s my type.” Taran drops the piece of armor he was holding, momentarily off-balance again, as he blushes scarlet. "W-w-w-w-w-ait, y-y-you're a-a-att-attracted to me? L-l-like, l-l-love and s-s-stuff?" Vishal blushes and nervously laughs, “Well....yeah. It’s....it’s more a crush than love but yeah. It’s...it’s part of why I went straight to Dulamul. He has a lot of the same traits and it keeps me from you.”
Taran stares, with his mouth hanging open, mind whirring. "W-w-wait, what d-d-does flirting mean then? I th-thought it was just when people were, you know, t-talking together and laughing and having fun, how-how does that connect to-to... what?"“Yeah. You can describe it like that. But there’s also a lot of subtext. A lot of physical touches and looks. And...well a feeling.” Vishal then starts to look a little worried as he says, “I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have told you. Since....well I’m pretty sure the Road members don’t let them date each other. It’s...another reason why I’ve been focusing and flirting with Dulamul.”
Taran sits with a thump, head reeling. "I-I had no idea, oh gods Vishal, did I accidentally flirt with Sim? I-I c-can't remember, and I didn't want her to know how I felt, I-I thought when people f-f-fell in love they, they just told each other, I-I didn't know... "It's clear Taran is only partially hearing what Vishal is saying, especially since the next leap in logic is, "W-wait, t-touching? W-what kind of touching?" He looks at Vishal, who might realizing just how innocent Taran is in the arena of love and dating, "I-I touch p-people all the time in the medical ward, is-is there a certain way? H-have I been flirting without realizing it? Why butts? I-I, don't you just go up to someone, say you love them and then get married?"
Vishal comes over and says, “Calm down Taran. Calm down. One question at a time. Yes you may have accidentally flirted, it happens. The touching has to be intentional. It’s lingering touches and touches in places other people don’t. Medical ward is different. There’s no attraction. That’s purely to help them get better. Butts is a personal preference. And no. You don’t no just go up to someone declare love and then get married. That’s not how it works.” Innocently Taran replies, "But... That's h-how it w-w-worked in the play..." Vishal smiles as he explains, “Real relationships don’t work like plays. Plays are sped up so the audience doesn’t get board. Relationships take time. Becoming friends. And then saying your feeling and hoping they return it. Then dating. And after you’ve been dating you say I love you and if you both say it then you get married.”
"Oh..."Taran says, calming down, "S-so.. She, she probably doesn't realize... Since it is... really c-complicated..." "Um.. S-s-sorry for freaking out... I, um, that... I wasn't... Todays been a d-day for learning all k-kinds of things I guess." Taran fidgets with his armor straps for a minute. "Um... Seriously though, why butts? Is it b-because it is the biggest muscle on the body?" Vishal chuckles before saying, “I think a good butt can make someone really attractive. Maybe it has to do with being gay. I don’t really know. I just know I find them really attractive. And a butt relatively big compared to the person is really nice. So maybe it’s because the biggest muscle. I do know you have a nice and distracting one.”"O-okay. Um, thanks I guess? I-maybe it i-is a medical thing, but" Taran shrugs, "Bodies j-just are, I know you h-have strong hips an-and defined calves, it-it's a d-dancer thing right? B-but..." He shrugs, "that's just a fact, n-nothing really s-special." He finishes putting on his armor. "Um... Sh-should I do something to em-emphasize my butt, since you like it? Or the opposite so I don't distract you d-during a mission, sir?"
Vishal smiles and laughs as he says, “Emphasizing it or not is up to you. It’s yours not mine. If you want to there are clothes that’ll do that. Speaking of which, it’s time to sell those swords and get you some clothes still.” "Oh... I f-forgot... M_maybe we don't go clothes shopping?" “Nope. We’re still going. Now let’s go.” Taran slumps, but follows Vishal. After selling the new stuff Vishal leads Taran by a familiar looking clothes store. They don’t get in yet as Vishal turns to him and says, “Taran. Are you really that against new clothes? Because I believe they’ll really do you some good. But if you’re that against them that you’re going to slump we won’t grab any.” Taran shrugs, "I-I don't n-need them. It, it would just be to look better, and I-I don't need to look g-good. I, m-my job is to fight, or to work in the m-medical ward... this-" he gestures to the studded leather armor he is wearing, "this is m-more than enough for someone l-like me..." He shakes his head, "B-but, I-I don't want to d-disappoint my s-second only f-friend either, so... if-if you think I should. I'll... I'll spend a little money on c-clothes..."
Vishal smiles as he says, "I'm spending it on you. And yes. New clothes can make you feel really confident. And confidence can really help you out in the field. Trust me. New clothes, new attitude, new you."He then chuckles before saying, "Maybe you can even visit Sim with your new clothes on. Try some flirting." Taran flushes scarlet for a second before withdrawing, "N-n-no, I... it's b-better if she doesn't know... she's... I-I'm not... I'm n-n-not the t-t-type of person she should be with..." He looks up at Vishal with wounded eyes, "Don't...don't tell her, please? She... she sh-shouldn't be with a murderer..." Vishal looks back with eyes of kindness and compassion, "I won't tell her. That's not my place to do so. But Taran. We've all killed in the name of this war. However, that doesn't make us murderers. And you're not a murderer for doing what your Dad told you to do. You're not a murderer, unless, unless you take a joy and pleasure in ending a life. Once that happens. Once you enjoy the killing, then you're a murderer." Taran breaks eye contact first, "L-l-let's g-get the c-clothes," he says instead, "I-I d-don't want to keep you t-too long." And with that he'd step past Vishal and into the shop. Vishal follows.
The shopkeeper gives you all a warm smile. "Hello, what can I get you?" Vishal smiles and says, “Hello again. We’re just clothes shopping and getting him a new outfit and I’m looking for a new shirt for a friend as well.”"Excellent. What sort of outfit, and what kind of shirt?""Um, I-um, i-it r-really d-doesn't need to be anything special, s-something cheap, th-that will last..."He looks at Vishal and then to the side of the shopkeeper, "Th-that's f-fine right?" Vishal speaks up as he says “You’re wearing it so it’s up to you.” However he seems to go in it more as if he’s thought about this and says, “But as we need undergarments and everything I was thinking some nice ones that show off your assets. And then some black leggings and a simple white tank top and that’s your normal undergarments to your armor. And then so you don’t have to wear your leather armor all the time some simple nice blue denim maybe a little fade washed with a simple v cut t-shirt in your favorite color followed by a nice light jacket over it in a complimentary color.”
Taran stares a bit agape at Vishal for a second, "U-um, b-b-but I need to wear my armor all the time. Wh-what if th-there is an attack, or an emergency mission? I-I have to ready." Vishal replies, “I make armor Taran. Trust me. In case of an emergency what I’m recommending for clothes will be enough. Plus armor isn’t made to me wore all the time." "B-but, I-I do wear my ar-armor all the time? It-it works fine, I just make sure to oil it and check th-the straps. It... it works fine..."He looks over at the shop owner, "N-n-not that I think your cl-clothes are b-bad or anything, but... th-they aren't meant for f-fighting in or working in the m-m-medical ward." Vishal replies, “Taran. You don’t have to be a soldier all the time. You don’t have to wear your armor all the time. Nice civilians clothes are good. And leather armor doesn’t take that long to get into.”"S-sixty seconds, af-after I run to g-get it," Taran says, "Th-that c-c-could g-get..." he trailed off, deflating. "I-I... if you w-want, V-Vishal..." he'd say.
Vishal let’s out his own defeated sigh before saying, “It’s your clothes Taran. It’s your choice. I’m just tying to let you know you don’t have to think like your Dad taught you. You don’t have to worry about being ambushed every second. There are plenty of defenses in place that’ll give you plenty of notice ahead of time.” He then thinks for a moment before saying, “I’ll talk to my psionsmith. He’s talked about armor that doffs in the push of a button. Maybe there’s some magical way to get armor that dons the same way.” "I'm s-sorry," Taran says not looking at Vishal, "I-I kn-know you want this t-to be g-good and f-fun and... and I'm just... n-n-not, even when I'm t-trying not to, I-I'm just making it h-hard on you, f-fighting with you. I-I'll just l-let you pick it out..."“It’s fine Taran. I’m not going to lie and say I wouldn’t like for you to at least try the civilian clothes. But we can just get the simple undergarments. It’s fine.”
"B-b-b-but it isn't," Taran's voice is rough, "I-I want what he wanted, I'm th-thinking like he told me to, I'm-I'm not normal, if-if I was normal then you c-could have j-just had fun t-t-taking me sh-shopping instead of this." He grabs his hair, "I c-can't want what I want, b-because that was what he wanted, b-but you want me to want what I want a-and you don't want to force me to g-get normal things th-that I should want. I-I'm too twisted up, I c-can't even tell..." He lets his arms fall limp, "J-just... t-tell me what to do..." Vishal can't tell if Taran is talking to him, or something else. Vishal doesn't really know what to do. What do you do when you're friend is having an identity crisis and a break down right before your eyes. Turning to the shop keep he says, "Get what I asked. Make the shirt gray and the jacket black. The extra shirt make a deep v-neck and a forest green. Wrap it all up but keep the green shirt separate." He then turns all his attention to Taran and pulls the man into another hug and says, "Its okay. All you have to do right now is breath. Just breath and listen to my heart. That's all you need to do right now."
The shopkeep begins getting clothes and placing them into bundles. Taran shudders against Vishal, breathing ragged. "N-n-n-not green... please... not green" he'll whisper, the pain and horror obvious in his cracking voice. Vishal begins to rub soothing circles on his back as he says,"Shhh....its okay. The green isn't for you." Taran nods jerkily. Continuing to gently rub Taran's back Vishal tells him, "After this. Let's return to my room. I think it's best if you lay down and take a nap. Okay?" "I-I...o-okay..." Taran responds. Vishal then looks towards the shopkeeper and seeing all their stuff ready he says, "I'm going to let go and grab out stuff. Then we're going back to my room. I'll be right back." Vishal tells Taran as he lets go and goes to quickly pay for the clothes. Taran doesn't really react, just stares out as the thoughts tumble around him. "Two and a half gold," the shopkeep informs Vishal quietly. Vishal quickly pays for the clothes, grabs them while giving the man a quiet "Thank you"before grabbing Taran's hand as he leads him back toward's Vishal's room. Taran follow meekly. "I'm sorry, Vishal..."he says quietly, "It's... it's all been today... all of it...""Hey, hey. You don't need to apologize. It's been a rough day. Just let me take care of you for a little bit. You can nap and then we'll talk once you wake up, okay?" Vishal replies calmly. "Okay..."
As they reach the inside of Vishal's room he makes sure to close and lock it behind him. Putting the clothes on a dresser he says, "Go ahead and lay down on my bed. I'll be here when you wake up." Taran lays down, fully armored, and stares at the ceiling. After a few minutes, he's fidgeting. "Is something the matter?" Vishal asks as he see's Taran fidget around. "J-just... th-there's so much to do...I-I.. I feel like I'm wasting time... th-that I should be doing stuff." Taran replies. "Taran. You've had a hard day. You've had a lot dropped on you at once. It's not safe to work when you're mind is occupied and reeling. Now I want you to relax and take a nap." Vishal's voice is showing concern and care but also trying to come at it from a rational side because he thinks that'll help Taran agree to it.
"Everyone al-always says that, that I can't keep working if I'm tired, or hurt, or confused... I used to think... it w-was because people th-thought I was still weak. Th-that they thought I still needed to get stronger..." "That wasn't it though, was it? Other people... th-they just aren't used to it. When I br-brewed my first healing potion, in Master Lukaan's class... I hadn't eaten for days... I hadn't realized the animals h-had figured out my traps... My first time in the medical ward? My st-stitches broke open, on my abdomen, I was bleeding everywhere... but no one noticed, because the soldiers we were treating were bleeding so much..." He holds up his hand, staring at it, "They were always steady. I-I-I could shake and shiver and tremble as much as I wanted... but my hands had to be steady. And they always are." He lets his hand fall back to the bed, "Tired, bleeding, starving, why is th-this any d-different?"
"It's not because they thought you were weak Taran." Vishal says, deciding on something as he begins to change out of his armor and into his own civilian clothes. "It's because they were concerned for you. Concerned you were pushing yourself too hard, too fast, too much and that you might die. Nobody wants that." Once he is done changing into his civilian clothes he makes his way towards the bed and crawls in next to Taran. "It's true you can be trained to ignore physical things like being tired and bleeding and all that. You've probably been trained to ignore those for a while. But this is more than something physical. This is mental and emotional. And that hurts just as much and you can't just ignore it. Because the more you do, the worst it gets.""I th-think I need to tell Mr. Dr-Druhdaar," Taran says suddenly, moving to give Vishal room on the bed, "He... he looks up to F-F-F-Father... he respects him, th-that's why... why he l-l-looked out for me, t-told me to be s-stronger, l-like Father was..." "I... It will hurt him... b-but I need to t-tell him, d-don't I?"
Vishal grabs Taran's hand so he cannot leave as he says, "You probably should. But now isn't the time. Let's get you in a better place first. Okay?" Taran nods, he wasn't trying to leave, just giving Vishal room, but he doesn't let go of his hand. "I d-don't even kn-know where he is,"he reminds Vishal. "Right. I kind of forgot he's on his own mission for a little bit." Vishal replies as gently rubs Taran's hand. "Hopefully he'll be back soon.""I-I think he's m-meeting us in Tashalatora... or n-near the monolith." Taran replies. "Okay. You can tell him then. And I'll be there for you the entire way." Taran goes back to staring at the ceiling of the room.
"If you're having trouble sleeping, I climbed in the bed so you can continue to listen to my heart. The rhythm should help."Vishal offers. "Maybe... I-I've n-never slept with someone before" Taran is still keeping his distance, not next to Vishal, just in the same bed. "Well you'll never know until you try. Come on." Vishal says with a smile. "Ok," Taran will awkwardly scoot closer to Vishal, feeling himself press up against the other man. Vishal smiles, "It's alright. I may like you but I'm not going to do anything. My Mom use to do this to me when I was upset and couldn't sleep. It helps a lot." "Do anything? Wh-what are you t-talking about..." Taran asks, though as close as they are Vishal would feel him tense up at the word Mom. "Oh...sorry. I...that's a touchy subject." Vishal replies as he feels the tensing up, "And by do anything I mean feel you up inappropriately. Touch areas I'm not suppose to." "Oh, th-the flirting st-stuff..." Taran responds, a littler slower, "Didn't... didn't even think a-about that. I'm... I'm not... if I do something wr-wrong, let me know? I'm just... th-this is different. Being so close to someone else, for so long..." "Don't worry, you're doing just fine. And...I hope this is helping. Even if you're not use to it.""Maybe..." Taran says. A few minutes later, Vishal might notice Taran having fallen asleep.
After about two hours, Taran would wake back up. Feeling unusually warm. Vishal hasn't moved from his spot and as he see's Taran waking up he says, "Good morning. How are you feeling?" Taran hesitates... "B-b-better.""Okay. That's good. And I'm glad that helped." Vishal replies sincerely before asking, "Do you....perhaps want to talk more? I understand you're going through a lot and you've been talking a lot. But I do think it's the best way to process everything.""I-I really should g-go," Taran says, starting to get up, "I-I've t-taken a l-lot of your t-time, and I s-still have t-to go b-buy s-supplies." "L-l-like I-I s-said... at th-the very least, I-I kn-know I h-have to protect Sim... and w-we'll need e-every tool t-t-to do that."
"Okay. Please. Come find me if you need anything. I'll be in Whitemouth for a day or two and then Malshashar. Don't hesitate Taran. Please. I'll give you time and space to think but....if it's too much please come seek me out." It is evident that Vishal is practically pleading with him as he says this, before he quietly adds, "And...don't forget your clothes." "I w-won't," he says grabbing the outfit of black and grey. "Th-thank you, V-vishal, I-I know y-you p-probably haven't used all th-the soap yet, but, um, s-since it-it isn't a surprise any more... I-is th-there a s-smell you'd r-really like? For the n-next one?"Vishal answers with, "The coffee one is probably my favorite. I won't use it to wash my body but I love the smell of it." Taran replies, "O-okay, I c-can do other smells, I might even b-be able to make you an oil, or something. J-just for the s-smell" "That would be great. But as long as you keep making stuff I'll keep using them." Taran will nod and head for the door. Vishal lets him go and says, "May the Light guide you Taran. And....please reach out if you need to." "M-may the Lady of S-Storms keep you safe." Would be his only response as the door shuts behind him.
Ranari is sitting at the table when you come in. "Vishal. Is this about Dulamul?"
“Yeah. I want to know how he was and if he’s still here.” Vishal replies
"He did fairly well. Expressed some interest in the light chambers, as well as learning how to read. He's not here anymore, he left yesterday for a village about five miles away. He should be there by now."
Vishal smiles. “That’s good. Am I allowed to know what village?”
"Certainly. It's called Whitemouth, named for its proximity to a limestone cave. There's a large population of shifters there, most born in Adar whose ancestors fled Riedra, but a few new refugees who were born into the Taskaan Legion like Dulamul."
Vishal nods and puts on a little bit of a forced smile, “That’s good. He sounded like he liked that one. To be with his people like him. I’m sure they can help him a lot.”
"He did seem interested in meeting other shifters who had escaped Riedra, and seeing the kind of life they could make." Ranari gives you a direct look. "He also asked if it would be difficult for you to visit."
Vishal’s eyes light back up a little with some hope, “Really? I mean....as long as I’m preparing for the mission I don’t see why it would be.”
Ranari raises an eyebrow. "No, I don't see why it would be," she says with a faint smile.
Vishal happily nods before saying, “Thank you for keeping an eye on him. I know you have more important things to do. But I really appreciate you doing me the favor.”
"Of course, Vishal." Ranari gives you a warm smile. "I was happy to make sure he was all right."
Vishal’s expression changes to one of curiosity as he then proceeds to ask, “Do you know where Lanan happened to land as well?”
Ranari frowns briefly. "Lanan is...still adjusting. It's not an uncommon reaction for ex-soldiers. However, he expressed interest in the Ghoza fortress, by the water, and is currently traveling their with the thickest-skinned guide we could find."
Vishal nods before saying, “Thank you. I want to make sure he’s not isolating himself. He’s kind of a brooder and wouldn’t have any friends if I didn’t speak up.”
Ranari snorts. "He's very busy being a cynical son of a *****. But maybe the inventions and innovations at Ghoza will spark his energy again."
Vishal chuckles as he says, "He's just prickly. But gives really great advise and is actually a good friend. Just gotta get past that exterior and find something to motivate him."
"That's what we hope Ghoza will do. He seems to actually have quite the head for strategy and tactics."
"Thats good to hear. I'll let him discover and get settled some before I bother him again. If you see him before I do though tell him he's still my favorite pain in the ass."
"I'll do that." Ranari laughs.
Vishal laughs some before saying, "Unless you have anything you wish to tell me in private. I'm going to take my leave now then. Plenty for me to do and I'm sure you have plenty to do as well."
"Thank you. May the Light guide your path." He replies before leaving.
Caelius's Private Conversation:
Ranari holds you behind as the others leave. "Caelius, what is it?"
Caelius blinks before opening his book and spelling out “Do We Need To Go T-H-R-O-U-G-H The M-A-N-I-F-E-S-T Z-O-N-E?”
Ranari shakes her head. "You don't," she says reassuringly. "You shouldn't need to go closer to it than the two miles the monolith is from it."
Caelius makes a face, one of both intense worry and discomfort for a split second before readjusting to a look of mild worry. He nods, and spells out “Thank You.”
Ranari gives you a reassuring smile. "I know about your history with Mabar, Caelius," she says gently. "I promise, you won't even be close enough to see Mabar-touched creatures."
Caelius zones out once she says Mabar, he snaps back and nods. He flips the page and points to a phrase, “May you always walk along the Path of Light.”
"And you as well," she answers.
Caelius bows slightly before walking swiftly out of the room.
Taran's Private Conversation:
Ranari tracks you down as you finish dropping your stuff off in your room and are getting ready to go shopping. "Taran? Did you want to speak to me?"
Taran freezes, "U-um... that is... I-I'm, to be honest, not that I w-w-would n-normally lie t-to you tr-trailblazer, but th-this is, well..."
"I-I'm s-scared to." He'd say in a tiny voice, "Y-you s-said you'd be l-l-looking into Father... If-if I d-d-don't talk to you, it-it remains a mystery. He d-d-disappeared and I j-just will n-never know wh-what happened..."
He'd grab his arm, trembling a little, "B-b-but, if, if he... if he.... d-d-d-d-didn't make it... I, I don't know if I want to know that... even if there are other things that... that I do want to know..."
Ranari nods seriously. "I looked into it. Why don't you ask me questions, and I'll answer what I can?"
The question sat in his chest, an ugly lump. The question a good son would ask. A strong son.
Taran took a ragged breath, then another, he... start with something easier, simpler...
"C-c-can you tell me, wh-where the m-mission was? I-I know I'm not allowed to know what the mission was, but... can I know where?"
"They were asked to escort a group of refugees from a village through a few dozen miles of hostile territory and into Malshashar. The group was composed mainly of women and children." Ranari frowns. "Do you want me to continue?"
Taran will nod mutely
"Three of the guides died, your father included," Ranari says gently. "I can't give you the details, I'm sorry. The remaining guide retired shortly thereafter."
Taran blinks up at Ranari, not quite sure why he is on the floor, a roaring in his ears. She wavers, like the plains do during the summer, air warping with the rising heat, but everything is cold like the void between stars.
A voice speaks, asking questions, questions that don't really matter but at the same time... "Did they succeed? Did the refugees make it?"
Ranari kneels next to you, offering you her hand. "Yes. All but one got across the border," she says gently.
"That's good," the voice says, as a hand fumbled into Ranari's. Just resting there, like a leaf on a pool. "The mission, that was always the most important thing. More important than anything else, make sure you complete the mission. Complete the mission. Hurt Riedra. Protect Adar. In that order, never forgot. He told me to never forget."
Something wet had fallen on his face, but that didn't matter. "He taught me everything. Everything I was supposed to be. Everything I failed to be. And now he's dead. He died, while I was still a failure."
"Now what do I do?"
"Taran," Ranari says, still in a gentle, reassuring voice. "Come with me for a bit."
Ranari gently leads you through Shalquar until you reach a plaza where kids are running around playing and someone has set up a stall with grilling meat and mushrooms. She brings you over to a bench. "Sit down, Taran."
He'd sit.
He doesn't really see the children or smell the food. Just the roaring in his ears. The endless silent roar
"Taran," Ranari says gently. "I want you to tell me about your father."
"He is a great man," He'd say after a moment, the words slow and quiet, but sounding rehearsed to a strange degree "Strong. A hero. He works hard protecting everyone from the Inspired. He is someone to look up to, someone I strive to be like, even a little."
He keeps talking, staring off a thousand yards at all the things he won't say.
"He escaped from Dor Maleer after my mother betrayed us. He saved my life, taking me across the country and here to Adar. He became a Guide after years of hard work, put through all the tests to prove himself, and he proved himself time and again."
"He is training me, trying to shape me into a warrior, so I can join the Summit Road. He is sacrificing the little time he has here in Adar, the few days or weeks when he is not on missions, trying to make me stronger." Tears flow and Taran's voice breaks, "I'm- I'm- ver-very th-thankful... for sob ev-everything he d-d-d-d-did."
"I don't want you to tell me what you think of him," Ranari says, her voice becoming a little firmer. "I want you to tell me about him. What kind of training you underwent. The sort of things he would tell you. About yourself, about Adar, about Riedra, about the Road. I've heard some...things about him, but I want to hear about him from you."
Taran turns to look at the Trailblazer, a spark of fear striking through the morass of despair and loss.
"I-I..." he starts shaking, "I d-don't... he is a h-hero, he-he d-d-d-d... I c-c-can't... I-I-I w-won't.... he didn't d-do an-anything wrong, I... I don't... he sh-should be r-r-r-r-remembered.... f-for pr-protecting Adar...."
"What you tell me won't affect how he'll be remembered. Someone is remembered for their actions in life, not what is said about them after death."
For a brief, mad second, Taran thought she was lying. That she had told him Father was dead to trick him. But... she is a Trailblazer, she is a hero of Adar. She wouldn't lie. And... if Father really was dead... he couldn't get angry at him, for talking about his training.
He could ask the things that had been yawning beneath him ever since he spared with Lanaan and attended the Trailblazer's class.
"He t-told me... th-that the Road was the only way t-to protect Adar, and that Adar was the only place in the world s-safe from the Inspired. He s-said... he said if we failed, and the R-Riedrans attacked, th-that everyone would be en-enslaved. We w-wouldn't be able to th-think our own thoughts, or dr-dream our own dreams. We'd be slaves. Forever."
Taran looks down at the cobblestones, "I-I asked, wh-what about the people? Of R-Riedra... He said th-they were al-already slaves. B-but then, I-I asked, what a-about us? An-and he g-got an-angry, b-but then he said... s-some p-people are st-strong enough to es-escape, because the Quori h-haven't won, and so th-they aren't s-strong enough yet. B-but if w-we are too weak, th-they'll win, and th-then there w-would be no hope..."
"Th-that's why I-I h-had to train s-so hard... s-so I c-could st-stop being weak..."
"And how did you train so you could stop being weak?"
Taran opened and closed his mouth, but nothing came out. Tremors wracked his body, and tears flowed. He gripped his arms, as if to hold himself together.
He wasn't supposed to tell. Father had said not to tell. If he told... if he told it would be admitting Father was dead. That he was never coming back. That he was all alone.
Except for Sim.
She was in Tashalatora, unaware of the Hanbanali, unaware of the danger.
If he told the Trailblazer no, if he refused to follow orders and talk... would she take him off the mission. Would he be in a prison cell when he heard about the monastery falling, that all the monks were killed or enslaved?
He'd sworn to protect her. He had to speak, or she might be taken by the Inspired, made a soulless, mindless drone in their Dreaming Darkness.
"It-it started with running." He'd say, his voice thick and rough, "I h-had to run to where he said before the hourglass ran out. If I was too slow, I-I didn't get to eat dinner. It got farther and farther. Up the mountains, in the forest. The c-caves were the worst. In the darkness, it was so easy to get lost, and I would get so hungry... I collapsed so many times... I thought, I thought I would die in the d-dark. That I was j-just too weak. Th-then I'd wake up, b-back home. Father had f-found me and brought me back. When I was eight... he had a mission. I was s-supposed to survive two weeks, he'd... he'd left a knife for me."
Taran chuckles, dark and bemused, "W-within the first few days I'd eaten something, some mushrooms I'd found... I was th-throwing up for hours, an-and I was cold, and I hurt. But I m-made it. I survived and wh-when Father got home... he said it was t-time..." He reaches up for the strap to his armor, but then remembers the children playing nearby. Instead he just traces his finger across his chest.
"He said to take the knife, and stab him. I-I said I didn't want to... he had his sword and... it hurt so bad. He-he said I learned two important things. I learned that Hesitation Kills, an-and I learned pain..."
Taran looks Ranari in the eyes, "I w-was a b-bad st-student. A we-weakling. He had to teach me again and again and again. S-s-such simple things. D-don't hesitate. Keep going no matter how much it hurt. He t-t-taught me how to use the dagger. The shortsword. Th-the b-b-bow. He'd go on a mission, be gone for a w-week, two, and I scavenged and foraged, and then he would come home, and we would spar. And... and it wasn't like how you sparred. He-he didn't stop. Not until I passed out, usually from bl-blood loss. Each scar was a lesson. A reminder. When to step back, when to duck, to never drop my weapon, to never stop attacking."
Taran turns back to the children laughing and playing. He'd always wondered what that would be like. "I only hit him once... I'd fallen, maybe I-I'd blacked out... he was reaching down for me, and I stabbed him in the side... He w-was furious. Sc-screaming about how I was b-betraying him. J-just like Mom... I think he almost killed me that day. I was in bed for so long, wrapped in bandages. Even with his healing magic, I couldn't move for days..."
"Th-there's one more th-thing..." Taran says, at a near whisper, "B-b-but... I c-can't... if I sh-show you... If I show you the memory... and... and Father was wr-wr-wrong... and... and I n-n-need to be p-punished.... can... Trailblazer, can you swear... can you swear you'll let me go and protect Tashalatora first? I-I won't run away, I promise, but... I don't want to be in jail... and hear that we failed, and that Sim is... I c-can't... she's... she's too important. Please?"
"I promise I'll let you protect Adar," Ranari says gently. "But I doubt you will need to be punished. Please show me, Taran."
He nods, and then enters the cave, opening his mind to her.
He's 13. Father is walking in front of him, talking about how this is an important test. A true test to see if he understands how important the lessons have been. They come to the cavern. A woman and a girl are chained to the the stalagmites. Father hands him the bow and a single arrow.
He says they are spies, captured trying to sneak into Adar. He knows Taran has been studying the human body, this would be a test of that knowledge. Of the knowledge of medical treatments he was taught.
Kill them both.
He can't protest. He tries but Father has the look in his eyes, the one that spells pain and new scars if he argues. He's shaking so bad, he can barely nock the arrow. It misses. Father cracks his sheathed sword against his shoulders and demands he retrieve the arrow. He's shouting, shouting how they are spies, traitors, how they were going to kill the monks with their powers. They are screaming, struggling against the chains and the gags.
He can't see straight for the second shot. Instead of a clean kill, it lodges in the woman's stomach. Father beats him again. Retrieve the arrow. This is his fault. If he wasn't hesitating they wouldn't be suffering. If he would stop being so weak, they would be dead and it would be over. Her eyes are green, tears and snot running down her face. He can understand her, this close, right next to her as he pulls at the arrow, hands covered in blood.
Begging for her daughter's life.
It takes two more shots. He doesn't know if he finally hit something vital or if she simply died from blood loss. The girl is hysterical. Her wrists are bleeding from ripping them against the chains. The gag falls off, she's screaming, calling them demons, murderers. She isn't using any powers.
He hears Father draw his sword. He sees the shadow against the wall, sees the blade rise behind him.
"Hesitation kills, Son."
.........
The snap of the arrow impacting her skull, the snap of her neck, the snap of the bow string. Green Eyes, staring at him, even so deep in the shadows that he can't hear himself screaming.
In the plaza, Taran is curled up on the bench, sobbing.
"I don't know, I don't know, I don't know."
Ranari gently wraps her arms around you. "It's all right, Taran. It's okay "
He flinches away from her.
Reeling, lost, hating himself and hating his Father whom he mourns for, Taran reaches for something, grasping at a glimmer, a glimmer he would see false if he was in his right mind.
"It- it w-was o-okay?"
Ranari frowns. "Taran. What happened..." She closes her eyes for a moment. "Take a moment to process. Then we'll talk."
Taran rounds on her, grabbing her by the shoulders, drowning, with only this one life line.
"N-N-no, please, I n-n-need to know sob, I need to know if-if they were in-innocent or g-guilt. Am I a soldier or a-a-a..." the last word is a whisper, "murderer."
"I don't know," Ranari says gently. "But I do know that you did what you thought was right. Because of the information your father gave you. But Taran," Ranari lifts his head a little. "You are not a bad person. You want to help people. I want to help you relearn the best way to do that."
All strength leaves Taran, the tears have stopped, though his eyes hurt with the want of more tears to shed.
"Everything was a lie, wasn't it? Father was a bad person. I killed people. I hurt them. I hurt you, because of how he trained me. What if... what if I hurt other people... How will I... what am I supposed to do..."
Ranari places a hand on your shoulder. "I'm going to help you with that."
Taran nods and askes quietly, "Wh-what do you w-w-want me to do, Madam Tr-Trailblazer?"
"First of all. In between missions, you're going to spend some time training with another trainer, depending on where you are. Someone who can help you sort out what you need to. This time, I'll help with that. But by the time you get back from your current mission, I'll have found someone who can take on the role in a more long-term fashion."
"O-Okay," Taran wipes his face with his arm, "I'll d-do what you ask... Um, I, I can take my normal training time and extend it a-a little, and st-still have time for gathering reagents, creating the s-supplies we need and w-working at l-least nine hours in the m-medical ward.... Um, w-would you rather I m-meet you in the morning Madam Tr-Trailblazer, since y-you have cl-classes in the evening?"
Ranari looks thoughtful. "We can figure that out in a moment. For now, let me ask you. Why do you fight for the Road? There is no wrong answer here."
Taran flushes, embarrassed because despite what she says, he knows his answer is wrong now.
"B-because Father told me to. Because it is the on-only way to protect people from the Inspired. So that they," he gestures to the children and the normal people laughing in the plaza (though a few might be staring at the boy breaking down and sobbing) "can be free and happy and not mindless slaves with no hopes or dreams..."
Ranari smiles. "That's why most people in the Road are a part of it. To defend the innocents from the Dreaming Dark. You see, Taran, you are a good person, no matter what your father said. The first step to this is understanding that."
Taran nods, but he isn't fully convinced
Ranari nods. "Right now, I'll give you some time to process. I think midafternoon would make a good time to meet, if that is all right with you?"
"I'll b-b-be there whenever you w-want me to ma'am." Taran says, completely serious, "I'll adjust everything else to f-fit it in." "Um," he blushes again, emotions running high, "where d-d-do you want me to meet you, madam Trailblazer?"
"How about back at the room you debriefed in?"
Taran blinks, "Isn't that..." he hesitates, but asks anyways, "Isn't that.. s-small for training?"
"I'll bring you to the room we'll use so that you can find it more easily."
"That sounds perfect. Stay with your friends, Taran. They can help more than you can imagine," Ranari says gently.
"I-I don't kn-know if we are f-friends..." Taran says, "I d-don't talk to them much, not really, I just... try and stay out of the way. To be u-useful in the fight a-against the Inspired... "
"You're very useful," Ranari says firmly. "From what I've heard, you were key in taking down the patrol."
Taran shrugs, "A-a-anyone could have thrown the M-morningstar. I-I wouldn't be surprised if there is an alchemist here in Shalquar that can make them. I just... I can't do magic, I don't have a connection to the Quori... so... I just try to do as much as I can... even if it is only little things..."
"Your worth in Adar is not determined by your ability to do magic or connect to quori," Ranari says flatly. "We don't work like that here-everyone is considered to have equal potential, and what you have done with yours is more than impressive."
"I'm sorry ma'am," Taran says hanging his head, "It's just... Father...he always said I was worthless. Th-that I c-couldn't do anything right... So... what I can do... I always thought.... it couldn't be very impressive. P-people w-would be nice about it, of course, but... if I could do it... anybody could..."
After buying the supplies he thought they would need, things for the mission, Taran had lain in bed, struggling to fall asleep. He knew the reasons, but he kept making new ones. The mid-morning nap, laying with Vishal, he blamed all of them for a time, trying to pave over the broken ground in his soul.
He woke the next morning with a plan, a schedule that kept him busy, kept him moving. Maybe that was what He would have wanted from him, but it was also normal. Normal was smooth, smooth would keep him quick, and if he was quick, they could save Tashalatora from utter destruction. That mattered.
He dressed quickly, and set out for the Medical Ward. Leaving the green beret in his bag. Signing in and volunteering. And maybe it was having a plan, maybe it was simply experience on the floor, but there was a quickness to his step that hadn't been there the last time (cunning action) and as he lost himself in the flow of work, of stitching wounds, of changing bandages and grinding medicine, he felt... light.
Too quickly for his taste, fourteenth bell approached. He had barely worked for eight bells, but, he had to meet with Ranari. He set out, pulling the jacket on over his leather armor. He had kept it in his bag to prevent it from getting blood on it. The material was more absorbent than his armor, after all. He left the green beret in the bag, staring up at him from the darkness.
He arrives at the room, a little before fourteenth bell.
Ranari's already in the room, working on a sheet of paper that looks like a form. She glances up with a smile. "Taran. You're early! Come in and have a seat."
"I-I-'m s-sorry I-I k-kept you waiting Tr-Trailblazer," he says sitting down in a seat , the new jacket bunches up behind him and he has to take a moment to adjust it, "I-I'll try t-t-o arrive ea-earlier t-tomorrow, I-I know y-you're very busy."
Ranari shakes her head. "I just said you were early, Taran," she reminds you gently. "I want you to come on time, a few minutes in either direction doesn't matter. I use a large variety of rooms in the monastery for dull things like paperwork, I'm just using this one today because I was already going to be in here."
"Oh," he says, "O-okay." he fidgets as he sits, keeping his gaze down, so he doesn't accidentally see any of the papers the Trailblazer is working on.
Ranari slips the papers into a folder, which she closes carefully. "Taran. Look at me, please."
He looks up at her, not making eye contact
"In my eyes, please," she says gently
He looks her in the eyes, and his breathing speeds up a hair, anxiety mostly
"Now. Today we're mostly going to focus on giving you a way to calm down when you're nervous, all right? To ground yourself."
"O-okay, um, I-I, um, I-I d-d-don't g-get nervous when I'm f-flowing though, a-and w-won't I b-be tr-training? S-so, I-I'll be o-okay... Madam Tr-trailblazer"
"This isn't just going to be weapons training. It going to be training of the sort most guides undergo, which involves knowing how to calm yourself under any circumstances, for example."
"oh" Taran says in a small voice, shoulders slumping a little, then he straightens up, a strained little smile on his face, "O-of c-course Trailblazer, I-I'm ready when y-you are."
"Okay. We're going to start by just helping you practice your breathing, all right?"
"O-okay"
"I want you to practice this pattern in breathing, focusing wholly on it. In for two counts, out for four."
Taran nods and starts the breathing, in for two, out for four, in for two out for four.
He steps back, going with the rhythm of his breath, stilling like a predator laying wait. In, out, this was the way of the hunter, there was no prey to wait on though, no beast walking down the mountain trail, or soldier patrolling. Perhaps there was someone else in the room though, hiding. Slow, in, out, scanning the room, stretching his senses, what was he missing, what wasn't he seeing.
Ranari watches you carefully as you fall into the rhythm. The silence stretches for one minute, two, more.
He couldn't detect anything, and it built in him, but he couldn't let the frustration out, that would be noise, motion, ruin the stealth.
Wait, that was all he could do, he didn't know for what, but he had to wait, stay still, wait, breath in, breath out, something would happen, he had to be ready. A twinge was beginning in his back, sitting was a poor angle for a long wait, slowly he stretched his shoulder up, working the muscles, keeping them loose.
Wait, breath, watch.
After nearly five minutes, Ranari speaks. "Tell me about that."
At Ranari's sudden voice, he twitches, breathing hitching and rhythm lost.
"U-um, s-sorry?" Taran asks, "I-I-I w-w-was just... i-it was like w-when I h-hunt, th-the br-breathing, th-that's wh-what it is s-supposed to be like, right? B-breathing, g-going still, w-waiting?"
"No, not watching," Ranari corrects gently. "Then you're focusing on something other than just the breathing. The idea here is to relax, Taran. To just breathe."
"B-but, w-what am I d-doing then?"
"Relaxing. Recentering your mind. If it helps, think of this as a way to resist mind games from the Inspired. Staying relaxed allows you to marshal your defenses in the best possible way."
"S-s-so, I-I sh-should th-think of d-defending? W-without m-moving, like th-the mountains?"
"No. You shouldn't be thinking about anything. If you allow your mind to be distracted by thinking about defense, or offense, or anything else, it'll detract from your focus on relaxing."
"I-I'm s-sorry," Taran says looking down, "I-I don't un-understand. Y-you w-want me to d-do n-nothing?"
Ranari nods. "Exactly. Nothing but breathe."
"O-okay, I-I'll try."
Taran starts breathing, two in, four out, two in four out. He starts stepping back, settling into the flow of the hunter, but that isn't right, those aren't his orders.
Nothing. He has to do nothing. But where is that? Three in three out. The rhythm breaks, he focuses on fixing it, two in, four out. Nothing, where could he find... one in two out, his breathing speeds up, he knows, but he doesn't want to go there.
Orders, do nothing. He has to, two in, four out, two in, four out. Don't step back. Go down. Down into the center of the Maelstrom, his breathing is erratic all over the place, but he focuses, down further, further. Keep the rhythm, two, four, two four, sink down, down.
It doesn't watch. It doesn't listen. It breathes. It is nothing.
Ranari is quiet for about five minutes, then speaks softly. "Taran? How are you?"
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Ranari gently puts a hand on your shoulder.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Ranari taps your shoulder, hard, a faint frown on her face.
A ripple nearly breaks the pattern, It focuses, keeping steady
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Ranari nods, then closes her eyes for a moment. You feel a prod at your mind, tentative first, gentle.
It doesn't respond, It holds the pattern. Two in, four out. Far below, deep, there may be a spark, but It holds the pattern.
Ranari sighs, nibbles her lip for a moment as if deciding what to do, then takes out her papers and goes back to them.
Ranari finishes her papers, closes her eyes, and gives you the mental equivalent of a slap across the face.
Taran lurches back, falling out of the chair, dagger slicing through the air, everything aches, and the sudden change in breathing catches in his chest.
He ends up on the ground, eyes wild, coughing and clutching his dagger in one hand
Ranari rises and offers you a hand up, apparently unfazed by the dagger in your hand.
Taran winces as he backs up, pulling himself up but not taking Ranari's hand as his eyes dart around the room, terrified
"Whcough what h-happened, wh-why... I-I'm st-stiff and... wh-what was that, w-was that a t-t-test, a-are w-we..."
"No test. You were doing quite well, but maybe a little too into the whole "doing nothing" thing. That could be a good emergency psychic defense, but let's also try and get you a way to relax without completely disengaging from your surroundings."
"I-I d-don't un-understand.." Taran says, still backed away and rubbing his sore muscles, kneading feeling back into them.
Ranari kneels on the ground. "You were...very disengaged from everything. It looked like a highly intensified version of the relaxed mental state we use to get psions in training in touch with their power by avoiding outside distractions. But it was highly intensified, so we're going to try and find a way to just relax you without disengaging you from everything."
"O-o-okay... um, wh-what do y-you want me to do? "
Part 2:
"Sit down again, next to me." Ranari gestures at the chair next to hers.
Taran heads over to the chair, sitting down next to Ranari, awkwardly adjusting the jacket again as it bunches up behind him
Ranari nods and looks at you. "All right, Taran. This isn't going to be easy, but I need you to pull back if you feel yourself tipping into nothing. So breathe with me, focusing on my voice. Two in, four out."
Taran nods, listening to Ranari, breathing two in and four out.
He feels himself starting to sink, but he pulls back, listening to the Trailblazer's voice. It's a struggle, but he tries to find an equilibrium, not letting the pattern drag him down again
After a few minutes, Ranari nods. "Okay, that's enough. Was that better?"
"U-um, I-I g-guess. I-it was really h-hard, st-staying up while counting. Listening to you m-made it easier, but, I d-don't think I c-could do i-it without you"
Ranari nods. "It's a start. Okay, now the next part of this, we are going to need a training room for." She rises from her seat.
"You're doing fine, Taran." Ranari gives you a reassuring smile. "I'm not expecting you to get everything perfect the first time."
He decides not to mention that they tried three times and he still hadn't gotten it right.
Instead he just follows her to the next test, hoping he didn't fail this one
Ranari brings you to a fairly large training room. She sits on the floor and taps the floor in front of her. "Sit down. We'll talk for a moment before getting started."
Taran sits, and waits for her to speak
"Why should you kill someone?" Ranari asks you calmly.
"U-um... B-b-because th-they are the en-enemy?" He asks in response
"How do you know they are the enemy? I'm not trying to trick you. Just tell me the method you use to determine whether someone is an enemy."
"U-um, y-you t-tell us which R-Riedrans to attack, and, um, if s-someone is a-attacking me or s-someone else..."
Ranari nods. "If I told you to kill the next person to come in this room, what would you do?"
"I-I..." Taran takes a deep breath, "I-I should f-follow orders. You w-wouldn't tell me to do that without a good reason. M-maybe the t-target can't know they a-are being targeted, and th-they are psychic, so I-I can't know who you invited. Y-You... I-I can t-trust you, right?"
Ranari nods thoughtfully. "You can trust me," she promises. "Don't kill the next person to come in this room," she adds quickly. "How do you discern right from wrong?" is her next question.
"U-um, helping people is r-right, b-because th-that helps the il-Yannah, and, um, f-following orders is right... Um, st-stealing is wrong, b-being a burden is wrong, k-k-killing is wr-wrong, b-but I'm already a killer, so that doesn't matter...
Ranari holds up her hand. "Taran, it always matters that killing is wrong. Even if you've already killed."
"B-b-but I'm g-going to kill again." Taran says quietly, looking down at the space between them, "Th-this mission, th-the next, the one a-a-after that... It-it doesn't matter that k-killing is wrong, I-I'm going to keep killing people. So that g-g-good people d-don't h-have to, so, so th-they can stay g-good and l-live in the A-Age of Light."
Ranari nods. "Yes. But it's important we remember that we are doing a terrible thing, even if it is for the good of others. If we become desensitized to killing people, we run the risk of becoming just as bad as the Inspired."
"I-I know, b-but," Taran looks up at the ceiling, "Af-after you hurt for s-so long, n-no matter how bad it hurts, it j-just becomes normal... And, if I go b-bad, th-then you'll j-just kill me," he looks at Ranari, "N-not y-you, specifically, b-but The R-Road will, an-and obviously I d-don't want th-that to happen, it-it'd be a w-waste of r-resources. H-Hopefully it-it will b-be o-one of the Riedran's who k-kills me."
"Taran," Ranari says levelly. "You should not allow yourself to fall into evil on the principle that we'll kill you when you get too bad. Nobody wants that."
"Oh, no, th-that's n-not... I'm s-sorry, I'm not ex-explaining it well... I-I d-don't want to become e-evil, b-but I-I'm just..." he shrugs, "I-I'm not w-worried. I'm already a b-b-bad person, and I-I'm not very im-important or very st-strong.... b-but I-I'll be c-careful, I promise, I kn-know n-no one w-wants m-me to b-be wasteful like that."
Ranari sighs. "Taran. Look at me. You are not a bad person."
Taran looks at her, confused.
"I've k-k-killed people, k-killing people is wr-wrong, a g-g-good person doesn't k-kill people. If I'm not a g-good person, I'm a b-bad person"
He gives her a small smile, "It's, it's okay. I-I'm n-not upset about it. I-I've known for years."
Ranari shakes her head. "Taran, I've killed people," she states flatly. "So has every trailblazer, and most members of the Road, including both the guides you'll be meeting to destroy the monolith. Killing people alone doesn't make you a bad person. It's your reasons, how you feel, and how you approach killing that affects what kind of person you are."
"I-I-I," Taran looks away, "I.. I kn-know you've k-k-killed p-people, Madam Tr-Trailblazer." he says, then quickly he tries to think of a way to change the subject, "Sh-shouldn't w-we s-start t-training soon, M-Madam Trailblazer?"
"This is training," Ranari says calmly. "Before I put a practice weapon in your hand and start a bout, I want to understand exactly how you think about yourself, how you see the world, and how you make your choices."
"O-oh, umm, b-b-but d-didn't you al-already l-let me use a pr-practice weapon? Did, well, did I s-skip a step before?"
"That was during a class, when you were just an ordinary student. Now we're having a one on one session, I'm getting a full sense of of you." Ranari shrugs. "Now let's return to the subject, please."
"O-okay, w-what else do you w-want to know, ma'am?"
"We were discussing the difference between killing and being a bad person," Ranari reminds you.
"Y-Y-Yes?" Taran tries to be innocent, but he knows the result even as he tries
"As I said. I've killed people, as have many members of the Road. What makes us different from you?"
Taran thinks hard, mind r-racing, but he can't see a way out of it. He could try talking too quietly, but he knows that won't work.
He doesn't want to say it, but, she's insisting and... he starts shaking and trembling, knowing this could ruin everything.
"N-n-n-n-nothing, Trailblazer, ma'am." It's quiet, but still loud enough to hear
"You're not a bad person, Taran," Ranari repeats softly.
"O-o-okay, ma'am" He say quietly
Ranari nods. "You aren't a bad person solely because you kill. The Road kills because we need to, and only when it's necessary. We don't kill innocents, or murder just because we want to, or for our own personal gain. That is what separates us from the Inspired, and if you give yourself up for lost, it won't just be a waste, it could do a great deal of damage to the Road, to Adar, your friends. And you would be mourned. And it's very important that you remember that, Taran. You're worth more than just the resources we would lose if you died."
"O-okay, Trailblazer," Taran says, but he isn't fully convinced
Ranari gives Taran a serious look. "New assignment. Each morning, I want you to repeat this to yourself. 'I am good. I have worth.' I want you to say that to yourself at least once a day, and any time you start to feel like you're a monster, or like you're nothing."
"O-o-o-okay, Ma'am," Taran says his voice small,
"Trust me, Taran," Ranari gives you a small smile. "I've met real monsters. You aren't one."
"I-I know, Madam Tr-trailblazer."
"Okay, now say it."
"I-I am g-good. I h-have worth."
Ranari nods. "It will take some time. But I want you to keep saying that to yourself. Now. And this is very important. The order of priorities is protect Adar, then hurt the Inspired."
"W-what a-about the m-mission?"
"The mission protects Adar first and foremost. The monolith is being destroyed because it threatens Tashalatora. But if, for example, you could destroy a Riedran patrol by leading them into a trap at an Adaran civilian village? We wouldn't do that, because it would be putting Adar at too much risk."
"Th-that makes sense." Taran says nodding along
Ranari nods. "Exactly. So the order is to protect Adar first, hurt the Inspired second."
Taran hesitates, then nods, "O-okay, M-mission, pr-protect A-adar, Hurt Riedra."
"Hurt the Inspired," Ranari corrects gently. "The Dreaming Dark. We kill Riedran commoners and ordinary soldiers if we have to, but it's never the purpose of a mission. The one you were just on, for example. You killed the soldiers, but it was to keep the Inspired from finding Shalquar. The goal of the mission was to protect Adar, not hurt innocent Riedrans."
"B-but, I can't hurt the Inspired." Taran says, confused again, "Th-their too strong, w-we can hurt the country, we can hurt Riedra, b-but none of the Ins-Inspired are there w-when we do our m-missions. We-we can't hurt them."
"We can hurt them by destroying their monoliths," Ranari explains. "We can cut off their access to their soldiers, confuse their efforts to find us, save the people they try to make an example of, undermine their effect on the people. There are a thousand ways to hurt them without directly engaging them. And it's possible that someday in the future, you'll be powerful and skilled enough that we'll call on you to go directly after one of the Inspired."
"O-oh, n-no, I'll, I'll never b-be th-that good."
Ranari raises an eyebrow. "You seem quite competent already. Don't make assumptions about what more experience and practice will do for your ability."
"O-okay, Tr-Trailblazer," Taran says, backing down again
Ranari frowns. "Taran, it doesn't matter what I say if you don't believe it."
"B-but, you are r-right, aren't you?" Taran says sinking down
"Right now it doesn't matter if I'm right or wrong. I'm trying to get you to change how you view yourself. That means that until I find a way to help you actually believe you have worth, I might as well be talking in Abyssal."
Ranari nods. "That's the purpose of the phrase. To slowly counteract that invasive idea that you're worth nothing."
Taran nods, silent
"Now let's go over how practice bouts will work."
"o-okay"
"With me, we won't be directly engaging much. Instead, I'll watch how you work on practice targets and such. Get you used to a constructive training environment."
"I-I d-don't follow."
"When you're training with me, or the person I choose to continue your training after this mission, mistakes will be treated as learning experiences, not crimes. It's okay to mess up, those are chances to improve, not be punished."
"O-okay, um, th-thank you?" Taran still isn't sure exactly how this is supposed to work
Ranari stands. "This is how training usually works," she explains. "As a supportive, enjoyable activity, rather than a harsh, painful one."
Taran bites his lip, and stands up.
Ranari points at a simply made humanoid target. "You can start with crossbow or sword, either one. There's practice swords right there, blunted bolts over there." She points to a few racks and boxes.
"I-I have one," Taran says unslinging his crossbow and pulling out his blunted bolt. He checks over the crossbow, tightening some screws and checking the string.
He then eyes the target and tries to measure out 120 feet away from it, to begin firing from.
"Closer please, Taran," Ranari requests. "Sixty to seventy feet away."
"We-we don't n-need to start th-that easy, " Taran says, "I-I u-usually sh-shoot from this di-distance for t-training."
Despite what he says, he does move up
"I'd just like to see you at various levels of difficulty," Ranari explains. "Shoot when ready."
"O-okay," Taran says, then he loads his bolt, raises and fires in one motion. Then he walks over to the target, picks up his bolt, and walks back to fire a second time
Ranari lets you fire five shots then calls. "Back ten feet and five more shots."
Taran backs up, and fires five more shots. Retrieving his bolt after every shot
Ranari has you repeat this until you're firing from 150 feet.
Taran does so without complaint, though he is noticing that he's moving faster than normal, covering ground quicker
Ranari calls a stop. "Okay, now let's switch to the shortsword, okay?"
"O-okay," Taran says as he puts away the crossbow and draws his shortsword, checking the edge, the feeling has been growing, an... unease.
"I-I'm s-sorry I'm not d-doing very well," He says finally, looking up, "I-I'm tr-trying to f-focus on y-your cues, b-but... i-it just doesn't feel right today. I-I can't s-seem to get it right..."
"You're doing fine, Taran," Ranari says reassuringly. "What do you think might be wrong?"
"I-I d-don't kn-know," Taran says, clearly frustrated, "I-it just... I-I'm n-not, I'm not moving right... I-I feel... w-worse than u-usual, I-I can't g-get in the flow"
Ranari comes over. "Describe what you feel you're doing incorrectly."
"I-I'm less f-focused," Taran says after a minute of thinking, "I-I'm moving s-slower, th-there's a hitch, wh-when I load the bolt, b-before I aim... It's.... n-none of it's right..."
Ranari nods. "Why don't you just run the loading for yourself for a moment. See if you can identify any powerful emotions or reasons for the hitch."
"O-Okay," he says, and pulls back out the crossbow.
He pulls out the bolt, winds up the arms, locks it, places the bolt. He pulls the bolt out and fires dry, resetting the crossbow.
He does it again, feeling the hitch.
Again. Bolt, wind, lock, hitch, place
Bolt, wind, lock, hitch, place
Bolt, wind, lock, hitch, place
He's moving faster, frustration and anger growing, it wasn't right, lock, hitch, lock, hitch. The flash of color. The spinning nut.
Tears stream down his face, sobs shaking him, he places the bolt, winds it up, the line locks in place, the nut spinning to show a tiny painted sun for a brief moment of light. Ranari looks at you. "Did you figure out what's wrong?"
Taran nods, his voice thick, "Wh-when sh-she b-bought it, sh-she thought I'd be a-alone, in the m-mountains. H-hunting g-goats or b-bobcats. Sh-she always w-wants to... to m-make p-people f-feel better... so, sh-she f-figured out h-how to t-take it apart, and sh-she painted a l-little sun on the nut th-that locks the string... t-to m-make m-my d-day a l-little b-brighter..."
Taran feels his knees hit the ground, clutching his crossbow and sobbing.
Ranari nods, kneeling next to Taran quietly. "She sounds like a wonderful person."
He nods, trying to wipe away the tears and pull himself back together
"Do you want to talk about her?"
"Sh-she is m-my first friend, m-my best friend..." Taran says, "Sh-she's the b-best person in the world... a-and... I, I need to k-keep lying to her..."
"About what?"
"A-about m-me... a-about h-how I g-got my scars and why I -I dis-disappeared and m-missed lessons. O-only n-now it's worse... b-because, i-it wasn't j-just s-stuff th-that c-could b-be m-misunderstood... i-i-it was......."
"Perhaps some day you'll feel comfortable enough to share with her."
"N-no!" Taran exclaims, "n-no... sh-she al-already w-worries a-about the wh-whole world... I-I d-don't... I don't de-, I don't w-want h-her worrying more a-about me."
"Well, I'm not going to push anything," Ranari promises.
"O-okay..." Taran say
Ranari nods. "I think that's enough for today. We'll try shortsword tomorrow."
"I-I, okay... I'm... I'm sorry, a-again, for all this, Madam Trailblazer"
On the day before the mission, Taran wakes up more nervous than usual. He get's dressed in his armor and the clothes Esteemed Vishal provided, and sits in the middle of the dark room, to say the mantra.
"I a-am g-good. I h-have w-worth."
He gathers up his supplies, the new alchemical items he has made, the reagents he had dried and stored. Then he heads to the portal, and steps out into Tashalatora. Home, for the most part.
You step out of the Tashalatora portal into the large cave it exits from.
Taran heads out of the cave, looking to go to the Temple proper, to ask after Sim and where she is going this morning. He keeps a sharp eye out for her distinctive purple robes though, not bothering to look for faces in case she was wearing a different one today.
When you get to the main temple, you find it's full of people bustling back and forth, from healers to warriors to priests.
Taran would approach one of the healers.
"U-Um, e-excuse m-me, s-sir, I-I'm t-trying to f-find Sim, um, w-would y-you know wh-where she i-is th-this morning? O-or wh-who w-would know? I-It isn't im-important but... I-I was hoping to m-meet with h-her today." The healer nods. "Sim's down that hall, in the first door on the left." He points.
"Th-thank you sir." Taran gives a quick bow and heads off down the hall.
He stopped in front of the door, trembling a bit with nerves before he quietly opens the door
Sim is mixing a poultice, tongue sticking out between her teeth as she crushes herbs and combines them.
Taran takes a deep breath, mumbles the mantra under his breath, and then quietly closes the door behind him.
"U-um, d-do you w-want s-some help?"
Sim turns as you come in. "Taran! Hi!" She jumps up and comes to give you a hug.
Taran awkwardly returns the hug.
"H-hi, um, I, well, I w-was... w-we have a m-mission n-nearby, t-tomorrow, and so, I, um, I th-thought I sh-should st-stop by."
"I'm so glad you did!" Sim grins. "Come on, you can help me add the redroot."
"O-okay, um, a-after, I-I g-got you s-something... you kn-know, s-since I've been away s-so long"
"Really?" Sim hands you a vial full of powdered leaf. "Two hard shakes."
Taran shakes the vial hard, twice.
"Y-yeah, um, I-I d-didn't h-have the m-money to b-buy s-something, but I found it, and I-I thought it w-would be u-useful."
"Okay, I'm listening." Sim grins as she mixes the herbs together.
Taran grabs the bowl of berries and starts juicing them.
"U-um, I w-want to show you, n-not just tell you Sim, b-but I don't want to t-take you away f-from your work."
Sim shakes her head. "You can show me! I'm almost done with the poultice."
"O-Okay," Taran says with a small smile, passing her the bowl of juice.
Then he wipes off his fingers and pulls out the jar of 80 Ephedra leaves, gently setting it on the table.
"I, um, well, I found a f-few patches... Over near Shalquar..."
Sim mixes the berry juice in, then gasps with delight. "Ephedra!"
"Yeah, I-I kn-know you make h-healing potions, and, um, I-I thought... well, l-like I s-said, I thought it would be useful
"It's amazing!" Sim gives you another hug. "Thank you so much, Taran!"
Taran hugs her back, smiling a little.
"N-no p-problem, I-I, y-yeah... um," he steps back from her, turning back to the table to begin putting things away, "S-so, um, I-I have un-until t-tomorrow. I,um, if it-it's okay, I th-thought, maybe, I-I c-could h-help you o-out today. J-just... you know..."
Sim nods. "Totally! We can always use help!"
"Gr-great, wh-where to f-first?"
"Okay, so I have to drop this off with Kiaara first, then I'm going to do some rounds in the wards, and then I have no idea!" Sim grins.
Taran chuckles a little, "W-well, l-let's g-get this to K-kiaara first then."
"Let's go!" Sim pulls you out the door, carrying the finished poultice in her other hand.
Taran allows himself to be dragged, trying hard to just be in the moment, with the girl he liked.
Sim chatters the whole way through the halls until you arrive at a door, which she opens, revealing a storeroom manned by a kalashtar with dark skin and hair. "Kiaara I have the poultice!" She puts it on the counter with a grin. "And this is Taran, he's my friend I told you about who got in the Road!"
"A-a pl-pleasure to meet you, Esteemed K-Kiaara." Taran says with a small bow.
"I don't have any title!" Kiaara laughs. "I'm just Kiaara. Nice to meet you too, Taran."
Taran will stand there awkwardly, not really knowing what to do or say.
Sim grins. "Anyway, here's the poultice! See you later Kiaara! Come on Taran!" She tugs you towards the door.
"H-Have a good day, Es-esteemed K-kiaara." Taran says as he gets dragged out of the room to follow Sim to the Wards.
Sim pokes you a bit. "Taran, you don't need to call all kalashtar “Esteemed," she laughs. "Anyway, I'm in the broken bones ward today, let's go!"
"R-right, I-I know, Es- I mean, V-Vishal s-said as m-much, but, it's..." a shadow flickers across Taran's face, "it's h-hard to st-stop doing s-something, after you've d-done it for so long."
He tries to shake the melancholy away, "S-So, br-broken b-bones ward, a-are we j-just ch-checking in, o-or are th-there cast changes t-today?"
"Probably a few cast changes." Sim shrugs. "There are about a dozen there, I think one person's due to get out!"
"It's great!" You two reach the ward entrance. "Okay, let's do this!"
"O-okay, I'll, um, I'll f-follow your lead, Sim, s-since I d-don't know the patients."
Sim and Taran make their way through the ward, changing casts, checking on bones, and taking the cast off one. After they finish, Sim grins at Taran. "Okay, your turn to pick something, I'm done with my stuff here!"
Taran freezes for a second before bashfully looking away.
"I-I j-just w-want t-to s-spend th-the d-day with m-m-m-my b-b-best f-friend," he stutters and stumbles out, "I-I-I, u-um, w-well, w-what d-do you w-want to do?"
Sim grins. "We could go by the temple, or you could tell whatever you're allowed to about your missions, or we could go exploring!"
"U-um, I-I c-can o-only t-tell you ab-about the f-first mission, really," Taran says, a small white lie, but he doesn't want to tell her about the potential danger. Or the killing.
"B-but, th-the t-temple or e-exploring, b-both sound g-good i-if I-I'm d-doing it with you," Taran freezes again, "U-Um, th-the wh-whole p-p-point is sp-spending t-time with you, so um, I, well, I don't c-care what we do..."
"Okay, we can explore while you talk!" Sim says cheerfully.
"O-okay, um, well, our f-first mission was to e-escort s-some refugees." Taran says as we walk, "Um, w-we met them out-outside of Hillcorn. Th-there was a young couple, t-two s-soldiers, one wh-who was a shifter, and, um, a young g-girl and I-I think h-her Father. She-she was the one who gave me th-this," Taran says indicating the grass braid
"That's adorable!" Sim grins and pulls you towards the exit tunnel. "They're all doing okay?"
"I-I th-think so," Taran says, following, "Um, V-Vishal sp-spent a d-day with the Shifter, I think, b-but that was a f-few weeks ago. I-I d-didn't r-really k-keep tr-track. I, well, I sp-spent a lot of my fr-free time wor-working the medical wards in Sh-Shalquar."
"That's great!" Sim ducks out of the tunnel in the mountainside. "So tell me about your teammates."
"U-um, w-well, th-there's Est- I mean, V-Vishal. He's... really kind. He's a d-dancer, and a l-leather worker, and he knows m-magic. Um, he l-likes my butt?" Taran says struggling to think of more details he can share.
"U-um, Mr. Dr-Druhdaar is on th-the t-team, that sur-surprised me. Th-then there is Mister Caelius, he c-can't hear or t-talk b-but he kn-knows a lot of m-magic, and he-he's al-always c-calm. Mister J-Juhaan is a ch-changeling, b-but I-I d-don't th-think he wants e-everyone to kn-know that. He, um, he gave me a beret," Taran says pointing to the bag, where he still has it stored.
"U-um, then there is Miss River, sh-she's a Kenku, an-and she's got r-really poweful m-magic, and a s-sword, th-though I've never seen her use it. I, um, I th-think she's n-nervous ab-about being p-part of the t-team..."
Sim giggles. "He likes your butt? And they all sound really nice! Have you just had the one mission?"
"Th-they are n-nice, um, we-we had a-another mission, b-but I sh-shouldn't talk about it." Taran points up one of the paths they are passing, "Th-there's a sp-spring up th-that way, if you w-want to go look?"
Sim nods. "Okay, let's go!" She grins. "You're already getting super secret missions, that's awesome!"
"Y-yeah," Taran says following her, "It-it's been a lot, an-and, t-tomorrows m-mission w-will be e-even b-bigger... b-but, wh-what about you? H-have y-you been d-doing ok?"
"I've been doing great!" Sim grins. "Lots of helping people and stuff. There's been a little more preparation for fighting lately, but there hasn't really been much change since you left."
"Pr-preparations? D-did s-someone s-say wh-why?" Taran trembles a bit, worrying, "I-I kn-know you d-don't l-like th-the fighting..."
Sim shakes her head. "Nope, no explanation, but you know Tashalatora goes through phases!" She laughs. "And nobody's asked me to do anything relating to violence." She makes a face. "So it hasn't really affected me, other than more blunt force wounds coming in from training sessions."
"G-good," Taran says showing her the hidden path to the spring, "N-not g-good th-that people are g-getting h-hurt, obviously, but, um, I-I d-don't w-want... It-it h-helps, kn-knowing y-you're safe..."
Sim grins. "I'm totally safe! This is an awesome path, so secrety."
"Y-yeah, I-I f-found it f-from a r-ridge, wh-while I w-was gathering some h-herbs, fr-from above y-you can tell a-a path is s-somewhere ar-around here, b-but it st-still took an hour to f-find the r-right spot. "
Taran steps out into the small little grove, with a crystal clear spring bubbling up in the center, surrounded by small bushes and hardy grasses.
"I-it's a n-nice litte s-spot."
"It's so beautiful!" Sim grins at Taran. "I love it."
Taran turns, trying to hide the blush spreading across his face, "I-I'm glad."
Sim sits down by the pool, taking her shoes off and sticking her feet in. "It's so clear."
"Y-yeah," Taran walks around the spring, pointing to a small crack in the basin, "Th-the water comes from there, p-pushed up th-through l-literal t-tons of rock and c-crystal, s-so an-anything that w-would b-be in the water gets c-caught below."
"That's incredible!" Sim grins at you.
Taran nods in agreement, sitting on the other end of the spring and watching Sim
Sim kicks her feet in the water, smiling as no silt is stirred up. "This is great. I hope I'm able to find it again while you're off on your mission."
"I-I c-can m-make a small mark, w-with some chalk, b-by the en-entrance, so you can." Taran says quickly.
"That would be amazing, thanks Taran." Sim beams at Taran.
"It-it's, n-nothing," Taran deflects, "I-it, it's j-just a little b-bit, g-give you somewhere to g-go, y-you know, i-in c-case y-you need a b-break.."
Sim giggles. "I'm touched you thought of it."
Taran hangs his head, trying to hide his blush again,
"I-it's n-nothing, Sim..."
"It's great!" Sim kicks a little water at you. "Seriously Taran, thank you."
"Y-your welcome," Taran s-said with a small grin, wiping the water off his face
Sim grins and lays back, feet still in the pool. "When'd you find this place?"
"Two, three m-months ago. Wh-while I w-was g-going th-through the R-road stuff..." Taran says putting a finger in the water, "I-I th-think it w-was after I f-found that b-big patch of Seregon."
"I remember that!" Sim grins. "Well I'm glad you found it."
"Me to." He says, enjoying the sunlight on the water, and Sims happiness.
"It's o-one of my t-t-top three spots."
"What are the other two?"
"O-one's r-really far away, we c-couldn't g-get there in a day, b-but th-there a path th-that leads to a cliff. And if you l-look out over the cliff, you c-can see the Jungle an-and the Falls. I-I w-was there d-during a sunset once, and the en-entire waterfall looked like it was on fire."
"Th-the other, It w-was a c-cave w-with beautiful cr-crystals, l-like a garden of light." tears prick Taran's eyes, "Th-that w-was the o-one, th-that th-the entrance c-collapsed." he lies, "S-so, I-I can't g-go there anymore."
He won't tell her that those spots are 2, 3 and 4 (reverse order) and that his favorite spot of all is where ever she is.
Sim grins. "They sound amazing. Maybe sometime when you have more time, you can show me the waterfall!"
"M-maybe, i-it is a l-long hike though, an-and we'd have to c-camp along the way, s-so we'd n-need to buy y-you a tent..." Taran trails off, "B-but, it, it would be nice to show you."
"I can get a tent while you're gone!" Sim says cheerfully. "And I can camp!"
"I-I kn-know, I-I just w-wanted t-to, um, well, it- I-I w-wanted to m-make sure you understood."
He couldn't tell her that it was the idea of being alone with her for a full day that had him so flustered, it'd sound weird.
Sim giggles. "Don't worry, I'll be fine camping."
"I-I know," Taran says, "Y-your g-good at everything, well, e-everything y-you wa-want to be g-good at..."
Sim laughs, blushing a bit. "I'm not good at everything! I just...practice a lot!"
"Y-you sp-spent more t-time pra-practicing pranks th-than th-the work M-Master Lukaan g-gave us, an-and you were s-still one of th-the b-best healer's in our wh-whole class." Taran points out, grinning a bit at the memories
Sim giggles. "Pranks are an important part of life!"
"I-I kn-know, y-you l-love making p-people happy," Taran says, "It-it's one of the things I l-l...like a-about you."
Sim beams. "I hope I'm making you happy right now. You're certainly making me happy."
Taran gapes for a second, struggling for words,
"Y-yeah, th-this... this is g-good," He finally says, burying in face in his knees, "I-I h-haven't... th-these p-past t-two weeks have... " He can't tell her, he can't burden her, he doesn't deserve that, he'll say the mantra later, "I-I'm g-glad we c-could sp-spend t-time t-together."
"Me too!" Sim laughs from her spot on her back, eyes tracing the clouds. "We should do it more often."
"Y-yeah, if-if I c-can, I-I'll try to st-stop by, wh-when I've g-got a l-little time. M-maybe, if... if I g-get a b-big break and y-you c-can l-leave th-the temple for a b-bit, I'll, I'll take you to the Falls."
"That would be amazing." Sim grins.
"Th-that's the p-plan then." Taran says, "Y-you g-get a tent, and the ne-next time I h-have a f-few d-days or a w-week, I'll c-come b-by, a-and we-we'll go to the Falls."
"That sounds perfect." Sim grins at you.
"Y-yeah," Taran says, th-then he stands up, "D-do y-you need to g-get b-back or do y-you have t-time for s-something cool?"
Sim bounces to her feet. "I totally have time for something cool!"
Taran chuckles, "O-okay, l-let's s-see if I r-remember where it is." He grabs a flask of the spring water, and then leads Sim out of the little clearing, marking the entrance with a tiny blue star, so she can find it again.
Sim follows you, grinning.
It doesn't take Taran long to find what he was looking for, though it is still another twenty minutes away from the spring.
It's a rock, sitting alone on one of the paths.
"I-I f-found it by accident," he says, pulling out two vials, he rubs the first oil onto the rock as he talks, "I w-w-was p-practicing u-up there," he points to the outcropping above them, "and I-I dr-dropped some of the vials I was working with."
"Uh huh." Sim nods.
Taran uses the spring water, to wash off the oil, and the rock takes on a slightly green tinge.
"W-well, I-I didn't w-want to l-leave st-stuff on the r-rock, c-cause I-I didn't kn-know what the mixture did, and you kn-know we sh-shouldn't leave mixtures to-to just react."
Sim grins. "It turns green!"
Taran grins, "Th-that's j-just w-what it l-looks like clean," He says, popping open the second vial, "Th-this, this is the cool part."
He pours a little of the second substance on his hand, and rubs it into the stone, where his hand passes, there is a faint light, resolving into a spider's web of green electricity, dancing beneath the surface of the stone.
"It-It's L-lamannian Flint, a-a whole b-bunch of it, and, if you add s-some ex-extract, y-you c-can pull th-the electrical e-energy to the s-surface."
The electricity will dance, just under the surface of the stone, for a minute or so
Sim laughs delightedly. "That's incredible!"
"I-I kn-know," Taran says, watching Sim's face light up,
"Lammania flint-as in flint from a Lammania manifest zone?"
"U-Usually," Taran says, "I-I don't kn-know if th-this one was ex-exposed th-that way, or if-if it was j-just exposed to a-a lot of l-lightning magic. B-but when I l-looked it up, th-that was the n-name the b-book gave. "
"Well that is awesome." Sim grins.
"I-I th-thought you might l-like it." Taran said, his expression a mix of melancholy and happiness
Sim nods. "I do!" She examines the rock and its electricity.
Ranari had suggested he try and exchange bad memories for good, to change associations. He tried that now, tried making this the memory of green that he thought of first. Of Sim's smile and excitement. Instead of the crack of bones and the shadows on the cave walls.
He wasn't sure it was working, but he'd made Sim happy, and there was nothing else that really mattered in the end
Sim giggles as she finishes examining the rock. "We should head back."
"Y-yeah," Taran said, checking out the sky, "We-we should."
Sim nods. "Lead the way, oh explorer," she says with a grin.
Taran chuckles slightly, then offers her a small bow before leading the way back to the monastery proper.
He wanted to ask about dinner, but she would probably eat in the cafeteria, with her friends and the people she worked with. He shouldn't intrude. This... this had been enough, right?
Sim grins. "Thanks Taran! When are you leaving?"
"U-um, th-the mission is t-tomorrow. We're s-supposed to m-meet other members of the R-road then."
"So you're leaving tomorrow," Sim checks.
"Y-yeah." He responds
"Then you can get dinner with me in the eating hall!"
Taran brightens, but then equivocates, "A-Are y-you s-sure, I-I sh-shouldn't in-intrude, y-you pr-probbly h-have plans t-to m-meet with p-people,"
"Taran, I haven't seen you in weeks! Come get dinner with me!"
"O-okay, s-sorry," Taran says giving in, "I-I j-just d-don't want to b-be a bother."
"You won't be a bother, you're my friend!"
"I-I know, I'm s-sorry." He gives a small bow, gesturing along the road, "L-ladies first, and all th-that."
Sim grins and grabs your hand, tugging you towards the eating hall.
Taran allows her to drag him along
Sim pulls you into the eating hall, which is fairly full of people, and heads for the food at the back.
Taran follows, automatically scanning the room.
Sim piles her plate with fruit, slow-roasted mushrooms, and flatbread, adding a slice of chocolate cake to the side.
Taran will grab some of the root vegetables and mushrooms, some nuts for protein that he knew he'd need. Trying to take only things there were plenty of. He wouldn't grab any desert
Sim sits at a table with the food and starts eating cheerfully.
Taran sits across from her and eats mechanically, not really caring about the taste and more just getting enough fuel for the day ahead
Sim mumbles through a mouthful of food, "Have you been to any other monasteries?"
"M-mostly Sh-Shalquar," Taran says after he finishes chewing, "Th-though I s-spent a little t-time at Malshashar. I-I st-still like it h-here b-best."
Sim grins. "We're the best!"
Taran grins shyly and nods, "Y-yeah."
Sim finishes her food. "So what's the coolest thing you've seen so far that you're allowed to tell me about?"
"U-um," Taran thinks, "I-I d-don't r-really know. I-I can't think of an-anything really. It's all b-been k-kind of n-normal really. I m-met some of the Trailblazers... Tr-trailblazer Ranari has b-been tr-training me a little."
"You're being trained by a trailblazer! That's awesome!"
"J-just, sh-she's h-helping... w-with some s-stuff." Taran says, "It-its... its b-been d-different...'
"It's still awesome." Sim grins. "I've never even met a trailblazer."
"Y-yeah, it's..." Taran takes a bite and chews, "I-It's r-really intimidating, t-to be honest."
"Well, you're going to have to tell me all about it when you see me next!" Sim grins and stands up, picking up her empty plate.
"Th-there isn't much to t-talk about." Taran says picking up his own plate, "W-we t-talk, sh-she h-has m-me go th-through some k-katas, it's-it's m-more about c-centering an-and, w-working th-through some st-stuff."
"You'll still have to tell me about it." Sim grins at you as she drops her plate off by the washing area.
"O-Okay, I-I will." Taran said, making sure to wipe as much as he could off his plate before setting it in the area, if someone was in the wash area, he'd thank them for cleaning the dishes
Sim grins and heads out of the eating hall. "Okay, I guess I should head to bed now."
"Have bright dreams, Taran." She waves and skips off.
"Y-yeah." Taran says.
He leaves the cafeteria, and after a moment, he turns and walks back outside the walls. Heading to the cabin, their house.
Taran climbs up the path, stopping in front of the wooden cabin that he had lived in, with Father. It was dark, cold, but the few weeks he'd been away hadn't been enough to cause any damage to the structure.
It was his home, where he grew up. Where he waited for Father to come home, and tell him where to go to find dinner.
Taran walked up to the door, then back to the path.
He knew dust and rodents had infested the cabin, they always moved in within a few days of them being out. He wanted to go in, to clean, to make sure everything was perfect for Father's return. Otherwise, Father might have thought he was slacking off, not keeping up with his work and training.
Father was never coming home.
As night fell, and the chill settled in, Taran curled up on the path, in view of the cabin, pulling his blanket around him. Unable to enter, unable to leave.
He dreamed of Father, angry, disappointed, and preparing to punish him for a day wasted in frivolous pursuits.
Vishal's trip is quiet and uneventful. When he get to the village, he find there are indeed a larger than usual number of shifters. In addition, there don't seem to be many kalashtar, and he get a few curious looks as you move through town. Spotting a couple places (Perception: 15) that Dulamul could be Vishal decides to go to the Path of Light temple knowing Dulamul is interested in it. The interior of the temple is quiet, veins of crystal running through the walls in such a way as to diffract the light through the room. Several people, both shifters and humans, are seated on benches or at tables, some speaking softly while others merely meditate in silence. One table has a kalashtar (the first you've seen in the village) leading a small discussion with three humans and two shifters, one of which is Dulamul. A smile cannot help but come across Vishal's face as he sees the shfiter. But not wanting to interrupt the discussion Vishal attempts to slip quietly into the background and just observe. He sees that Dulamul seems to be enjoying himself, his shoulders are relaxed, and occasionally you can see him give a brief laugh.Vishal has a small smile as he sees this and will just continue to observer until its either over or someone interrupts him. (Stealth: 13, Perception: 9, Insight: 15)
After about half an hour, they all rise from the table, standing to go. Vishal stands up as well and waits for Dulamul to notice him. Dulamul notices you about halfway to the door and stops, surprise on his face. Vishal, a giant smile on his face, walks towards him now that he's finally noticed. Not sure exactly what the proper way to say hello is after their last encounter he settles with a simple, "Hey. Fancy seeing you here." "I thought you were on mission?" Dulamul raises an eyebrow. Vishal shrugs and says, "It was a short one. And I said I'd visit you after my next mission. I honestly didn't expect it to be so soon either.""Well, hello there," Dulamul laughs. Vishal laughs back before saying, "I don't know if you had any plans for after your meeting. But I'd love to get food and talk." Dulamul shakes his head. "I didn't have any plans."“Alright. How about we grab a bite then?” Vishal stomach then growls as he embarrassingly admits, “I may have skipped breakfast to be here quicker.” Dulamul snorts. "Come on." Vishal grins and attempts to grab Dulamul’s hand as he lets him lead him to where they need to go.
Dulamul smiles and takes it. He leads you to one of the taverns, where he waves at the bartender and grabs a table. Vishal has a really genuine bright smile on his face as he says, “You’re adjusting really well it seem.” Dulamul nods. "It's...nice. Peaceful." “That’s good.”Vishal replies with a smile before adding, “It looks like you’re already making friends. Which is good. And quick, you’ve only been here.....a day maybe two?” Dulamul shrugs. "Everyone here's very friendly." “That good to hear. Are they helping you get everything you need. A place to live. A way to get food and water. Money.” Vishal looks embarrassed as he says, “I honestly don’t know much about what happens once we get you to safety.”Dulamul smiles. "The Road gave me some funds to get started while I...figure stuff out." Vishal nods as he says, “That’s good. I guess you have a lot of thinking to do still.” Dulamul nods. "Yeah...like I said, still figuring stuff out." Vishal replies, “Ranari told me that you’re interested in learning to read and the Path of Light still.” Dulamul shrugs. "They both seem...interesting."
“And what about drawing? Given anymore thought to that.” Dulamul shrugs again. "I'm not sure. It was just something I was trying out...it's only been a couple days since you've seen me after all," he says with a faint smile.“Right sorry.”Vishal says with a nervous laugh, “I guess I’m forgetting that. Being on missions kind of....makes you feel like you’re missing out on a lot.”"I'm pretty sure that's not specific to a mission,"Dulamul says with a smile. "I think that happens anytime someone goes on a trip."“Yeah you’re right.”Vishal replies before adding, “I’m just always gone. And even when I’m not I’m expected to prepare for the next mission.” Dulamul shrugs. "I wouldn't expect anything else."“Yeah. But it doesn’t help with the feeling like you missed a lot stuff.” Dulamul smiles. "Understandable."
Vishal smiles and then ask, “How’s the food here?”"Not bad. A lot more flavor than what I'm used to."Dulamul replies. “Do you like it? I mean....if you don’t you can probably ask for less spice.” Dulamul shakes his head. "It's good, just...different."“Okay.”Vishal replies with a smile, “I just wanted to make sure you knew it was okay to not like something and ask for it to be changed.” Dulamul nods. "I've had the acceptance of dissatisfaction emphasized quite a bit over the last few days,"he laughs. Vishal looks legitimately confused, “What?” "It's okay to say you don't like something,"Dulamul smiles. “Oh.” Vishal says now that he gets it. He then chuckles a bit now that he gets it.
Dulamul smiles and waves a server over. "Platter of roasted mushroom and some flatbread for me." “Can I have some meat skewers and flatbread please.” Vishal orders. The server nods and heads back to the bar. As the waiter leaves Vishal says, “I broght you a gift Dulamul.” Dulamul raises an eyebrow. "Yeah?""Yeah. It's nothing too special but....I remember talking about it."Vishal replies as he goes into his pack and pulls out the wrapped package. Dulamul cocks his head curiously. "Go ahead. Open it." Vishal says excitedly. Dulamul opens it carefully, smiling a little as he sees the shirt inside. "A shirt, huh? Making a statement about my fashion sense?" he teases. Vishal smiles before saying, "Hey. I picked out your outfit. And I think I have great fashion sense."Dulamul smiles. "There's a shock." Vishal smiles and laughs before saying, "If you didn't like it you wouldn't be wearing them still." Dulamul rolls his eyes. "I have a limited number of outfits right now, you know."Vishal shrugs as he says, "Still wearing what I picked out. And as long as I'm around I'll keep giving you clothes. That way I know you're looking extra good."
Dulamul laughs. "Well, thank you then." Vishal smiles and says, "You're welcomed. And I hope you like it.""I do, it's wonderful." Vishal smiles even brighter as he says, "Great." He then looks around a little bit and says, "I've never actually been to this village. I know there limestone cave is nearby but I've actually never visited it." Dulamul nods. "From what I've heard, it's a beautiful place. Underground river, slots of stone letting in light, that kind of thing. This place is nice. Quiet, like I said. And peaceful." "That sounds amazing. Have you been yet?" Vishal asks curiously. Dulamul shakes his head. "Do you want to go after this meal?" Dulamul shakes his head. "I was planning on going in a few days, some of the other shifters said they'd take me. I want to show you a spot I found yesterday.""Okay." Vishal replies excited that Dulamul is going to show hime something. "The next time I visit you can show me the cave." "Sounds good." Dulamul nods.
Smiling Vishal decides to say, "So....I don't think Druhdaar has figured out it was us that did that prank yet. He actually wasn't on our last mission." Dulamul raises an eyebrow. "Why?""He got assigned to a different one."Vishal replies with a shrug, "Sounded like a personal mission. But he'll be on our next one." Dulamul nods. "Makes sense." "Right." Vishal says with a nod before saying, "I'll see if I can tease him a little bit about it once I see him again." Dulamul laughs. "Let me know how it goes...if you survive." Vishal smiles and laughs as he says, "I think I can take him. I'm stronger than I look." Dulamul smirks. "He seems like he'd...overreact to that kind of thing." Vishal chuckles as he says, "Maybe but it'll be fine. I'm just hopping it'll help him open up some.""Well I wish you luck with that." Dulamul should as the server give over your orders and two mugs of water. “Thank you.” Vishal says to Dulamul and the server before he takes a bite of his skewer.
It's well spiced and excellently cooked. Dulamul piles some mushrooms on flatbread and takes a bite. Vishal hides his mouth as he says, “This is so good.” And unable to help himself starts to very quickly dig into it. Stopping at one point to quickly gulp some water down as he didn’t chew a piece all the way in his hunger. Dulamul smiles as you eat. Finishing his food in under 10 minutes Vishal has a giant content smile on his face as he says, “That really hit the spot. And I guess I was hungry than I thought.”"Well you skipped breakfast," Dulamul points out with a smile. “Right. I didn’t think it’d effect me that much.” Dulamul raises an eyebrow. "Well now you know." Vishal laughs before saying, “Well....skipping breakfast was worth it.” "Yeah?" “Yeah completely.” Vishal blushes a little as he says, “I wouldn’t eat at all if it meant seeing you just a little bit sooner.” Dulamul laughs. "I wouldn't want that. A little delay is okay if it means you stay healthy."
Vishal softly smiles as he says, “Yeah, okay. I just don’t have as much time as I’d want with you so...I’m trying to maximize it.” Dulamul shrugs. "How long will you be in Whitemouth?"Vishal let’s out a sigh as he says, “I probably shouldn’t stay more than the day. Our next mission is in two weeks. It’s a really big and well.....dangerous one. We have a lot to prepare. I need to make some armor which is going to take at least a week plus however long the psionsmith takes to put the enchantment on the armor.” Dulamul nods. "Good luck," he says seriously. “Thank you.” Vishal replies sincerely as he adds, “This is the first one where....well where I think we really need it and....this is more dangerous than the others.” Dulamul nods. "Is there anything you can tell me-anything I can help with?"Vishal looks at him and says, “I’m heading across the border. I can’t say anymore than that. And.....knowing you’re here, you’re safe, and thinking about me. Well....that’s more than enough to motivate me to make it back.”
Dulamul smiles. "Well, I'll just have to make today particularly memorable, if you've only got the one." Outwardly Vishal has a smile on his face as he says, “Thank you. That’ll help more than you know.”While on the inside he’s mentally telling himself to not get his hopes up about anything. "Great!"Dulamul swallows the last of his food. "Ready to go?" Vishal smiles and says, “I’m ready let’s go.” Dulamul nods and rises, leaving an assortment of coins on the table. "Come on." Vishal smiles and quickly follows Dulamul, excited to see what the shifter has to show him.
The two weeks pass relatively uneventfully for most of you, as you spend it preparing, training, visiting, and other such things. Two weeks after the briefing, you find yourselves arriving at the rendezvous point, having been rejoined by Druhdaar shortly before arriving. As you arrive at the spot, a small valley between two hills, the word "Birth," rings out from the walls.
After giving the countersign, you see two figures drop down from a well-concealed blind in the hill walls.
One is a young kalashtar woman with silver hair and eyes, a recently stitched cut on her cheek appearing to be healing. She gives you all an even look, then a brief bow. "Sirkashtai."
The other is a young man wearing glasses with his dark hair back in a messy ponytail. Pale, diamond shaped tattoos cover his arms, and he gives you all a grin, sticking his hand out. "6947, but everyone just calls me Diamond. So you're the guides we'll be working with, huh?"
Before they hopped through the portal Vishal had gifted Taran a new set of studded leather armor and quickly told him what it does, including magic to help with stealth, pockets with lots and lots of space similar to but smaller than Juhaan’s bag, and the hidden wrist compartment for daggers.
“Looks like it. My name is Vishal, by the way.” Vishal says aloud introducing himself to the others. “I’ll let the rest of the team introduce themselves.”
Ever since he returned within the group, the others can't help to notice something drastic has happened with Druhdaar's appearance: the once-hirsute, discheveled wild man is now, if not exactly well-groomed, at least a lot cleaner and more soberly dressed. The first thing that strikes the group is the druid's new hairdo, as both sides of his pate have been almost completely shaved, only leaving a shade of stubble around his head and back towards the nape of his neck, in the old classic Talashatori warrior monk style. As for his rank-smelling hide armor, it's been replaced by a simply cut but clean tunic of coarse, grey-beige cloth reinforced at the shoulders, elbows and knees, with a thick wide belt of the same material overlaid with heavy cotton thread. Most surprising of all: his forehead, left cheekbone and bare left shoulder now bear the markings of the Shalquar monastery signifying his belonging to the Novice Order.
As for his general mood, it remains gruff but the big man seems a little more subdued, as if some of the old seething anger just underneath the surface was somehow better kept in check. Finally Druhdaar also seems to have lost some weight, the ruddy puffiness of his face giving way to a leaner, more settled expression.
One thing that hasn't changed: he barely utters a word to the others as he resumes his old place within the team, answering most comments and questions here with a quiet look, there with a non-committal grunt.
' Rogues Will Be Rogues ' (Circle of Fives Admission Rules, § 6 par. IV) " Put It Down. Now. Or Be Sorry. " (D. Khar-Errendis' Reported Tips For Curing Soul Ailments And Assorted Bad Behaviours, v. LIV p.XIII) " Tween thisThy and yonThou, shall I prove to Thee that these art what thou dost see ? " (Grimoire of The Great Pananthyr) " This One has said enough. Now, we fight. This way please ?" (8th Grade Bronze Disciple Raulnar Drohjo, Way of the Open Palm)
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Ranari shakes her head. "Not the one in Hillcorn. The Inspired are finishing the construction of one at the edge of the Shanjueed Jungle-about two miles away. We think it's close enough that they'll try a foray there soon with additional power granted by the monolith. In two weeks, the Inspired will be finished and the rearguard they leave will depart. So we're giving you two weeks to prepare however you want and get across the border to meet with the rest of your team. Which brings me to the next part of this. Druhdaar will indeed be joining you, and you'll also be working with two other guides who have spent several months in Riedra observing the area. They'll have better information, but they've given us basic maps of the area and the location you'll be meeting them. As for getting to the meeting spot, I would recommend using the psionic portal system to get wherever you need to go for supplies, then use it to get to Tashalatora and go through the pass from there. It's only half a day's trek to the rendezvous from there."
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Taran stills as Trailblazer Ranari talks. He imagines the forces of Riedra forcing their way through Shanjueed, of them seiging Tashalatora. Of Sim, caught in the path of that devastation, medical kit in hand as she runs from soldiers with dead eyes and crimson swords.
Then his thoughts turn to fire and death, before he forces himself to calm down and focus. They would die later, now he had to plan.
"T-T-Trailblazer, um, h-how d-d-do we d-destroy a hanbanali ? Ar-aren't they, well, n-nearly in-destructible?"
Taran blushes and lowers his head in shame, "And, um, well..." his voice catches, recriminations for his earlier folly's tearing at him, he should have known instead of doing what he did, "I-I al-already u-used all th-the funds y-you provided before... I-I'm s-sorry. I... I should have known something l-like this would c-come up. If I'm going to protect her, them, the people of Tashalatora... I w-would s-s-selfishly ask f-for further funds... I-I'm so sorry..."
Taran Cragshollow (Summit Road)
Ranari nods. "Regarding the monolith. They're difficult to destroy, but a few things can do it. One, bonding with it psionically and setting it to self-destruct, which is taxing and dangerous, but gives you a little more control over the explosion. Two, dealing enough damage that it explodes almost immediately, giving you less time to get away but is less difficult. Three, overwhelming the core with power so that it self-destructs, which is also a more imminent explosion. The other two guides will likely have suggestions on the best way to bring down this one. And naturally you'll all be provided with funds, not to worry Taran. We understand this is a difficult mission that will require resources and purchases. We don't expect you to hoard your money against future crises, but rather prepare for the missions you have now."
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Juhaan
"Alright, how will we know the names and verify the identity of the agents we're going to be in contact with?" Juhaan asks flipping his hat on his hands.
Ranari nods. "The guides will be at the rendezvous point all day in two weeks. It will follow a similar procedure to the rendezvous point you set up with the refugees, but the roles will be flipped this time. Your code word will be Ancient, and the one they'll give you will be Birth. I won't be giving you physical descriptions in case something happens during the interim between now and you meeting them, but one of them is named Sirkashtai and the other goes by Diamond. They've both been briefed on your names only as well, and will wait for you to initiate the code exchange."
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Caelius has been completely silent, looking intensely concerned. Finally he raises his hand and signs,
“How large is a M-O-N-O-L-I-T-H?”
Tooltips | Snippet Code | How to Homebrew on D&D Beyond | Subclass Guide | Feature Roadmap
Astromancer's Homebrew Assembly
"The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read." - Terry Pratchett
Taran looks at Caelius, then turns to the Trailblazer, "Um, Mister C-Caelius wants to kn-know , um, h-how l-large is a Hanbanali m-monolith?"
Taran Cragshollow (Summit Road)
"Typically the shell is about a hundred and fifty feet in diameter," Ranari explains. "Your allies will have specifics on this particular one."
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Ranari stands. "All right, if there's nothing else you're dismissed. You have the next two weeks to prepare as you wish, just make sure you're at the rendezvous point in fourteen days." She hands you each a bag. "Two hundred gold each to prepare and buy stores. Good luck." Her eyes are serious. "This will be difficult, and potentially deadly. Listen to your teammates, work together, and deal a blow to the Inspired. Anyone who wishes to speak with me in private can of course do so now. May the Light guide your paths."
OOC: Okay. Ash is coming back on the 5th. You guys have until Sunday to prepare, unless you end up finishing early. Unless there are objections, I'll start Sunday with you approaching the rendezvous site with the other guides. Good luck!
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Vishal and Taran: Part 1
Vishal, after his and Taran's private meeting with the Trailblazer, spots Taran heading back towards room. The young Road members eyes looking vacant and cried out. He was going to say something else but upon seeing Taran in this state says, "Taran. What's wrong?" Concern clear in his voice. Taran stops and turns, seeing Vishal. He straightens up and tries to pull himself together. "Uh, um, Esteemed, I mean, Sir, I mean, V-v-Vishal, um...It's, um.... I'm s-sorry, I w-was... D-d-did you need something, Sir, I mean Vishal?" “Taran.” Vishal says sincerely and then realizing we’re in public he says, “Why don’t you come to my room?” "O-oh, um, okay?" he says, blinking a bit, but following Esteemed Vishal back to his room.
Taking him back to his room Vishal closes the door behind him and then sits on his bed. Lightly patting the spot next to him he says, “Sit down. You can relax.” Taran sits, though relaxed is far from what you could call it. "Um, d-d-did you need something? I-I w-was, well, I pr-probably was, going to st-start, um, selling the Riedran's eq-equipment and buying supplies... there's..." he chokes up a second, "th-there's a lot..." Vishal looks at Taran’s eyes and says, “What the matter? You’re obviously upset and have been crying. You were really fidgety in the meeting with Ranari. Please, tell me what’s the matter.”
"I-um, I," Taran breaks eye contact, "I-I w-wouldn't even know where to s-s-start, and I-I don't w-w-want to bother you. Tr-Trailblazer Ra-Ranari is, sh-she already w-wants to l-let me t-take up her time, I-I don't want to t-take up yours too...I-I'll be a-a-able to do the m-m-mission. For her, for her a-at least, I w-w-won't l-let myself stop. N-not even if it k-kills me too." “Taran.” Vishal replies as he reaches out and grabs his hand, “I’m not asking if you’re okay because of the mission. The mission means nothing to me compared to you. I told you last time, we’re friends. And my friend is really upset right now. And I don’t know why or how to help because you’re leaving me in the dark. Don’t leave me in the dark Taran. Let me be a good friend and help. Please.” Taran shakes, trying to hold back the sobs. "Y-you can't... I-I don't even know... I don't know wh-what's bad or good or right or wrong, it's all gone, there's... I'm d-drowning in it... th-the one thing, the one thing I know is right, that I know I need to do... I need to protect Tashalatora... I n-need to pr-protect Sim... e-e-even if I'm a monster, that is right, that's good"
Vishal gently squeezes Taran's hand to let him know he's there for him, "Protecting those you hold dear is good Taran. But....you don't have to loose yourself, loose your humanity while you do it. That's the number one thing that separates us from the Inspired. Humanity. We haven't lost it. We still see the people as people and care for them. We still want to help them and....not kill everyone if we can. The Inspired don't care about that. They'll go through every human they can if that means the cycle never continues." "I d-don't know if I am human..." Taran says quietly. He squeezes Vishal's hand, when he starts talking, his voice is different, emotionless, "Non-dominant hand, dagger sheath on dominant side, flip and pull, off-balance you'll turn as you fall, I'll drive the dagger into your throat. Or twist and gut, surprise slows you down, pain stuns you, finish you before you think to heal yourself." He points to the door, hand rocksteady, "Someone bursts in, fire is most distracting, creates barrier, vial of alchemist fire in an underhand toss, even if I miss creates a barrier. flip over bed, pulling you with me, crossbow out and loaded within six seconds, bed provides cover, fire as enemies pour through. " His hand starts to shake, and Taran comes back, his voice normal, "He-he tr-trained me. B-but it was a lie. I killed people, I've thought about killing everyone, every room I look for exits and entrances, I hurt the Trailblazer in sparring, because I-I d-don't even know what normal sparring is like." His arm drops, "Ev-everything is a lie and he's dead and I d-don't know if I should h-h-hate him or cry for him or... anything. I-I-I don't know..."
"Taran..." Vishal says, showing a lot of worry and concern, "You are human. He may have trained you. He may have taught you to think everyone is an enemy. Of what to do if I turn on you, or we're suddenly ambushed here, or any other manner of unspeakable things. But he is not you, Taran. He may have taught you everything he knew, but not everything you know. You are your own person. You can make your own choices. Its your choice how you're going to live your life, what you're going to do, how you're going to implement his training." Looking at him Vishal then pulls his friend into a hug and says, "It's okay to be angry, its okay to cry, I'm here for you. So you can let it all out. Just....remember that you are you, not him." Taran is limp in Vishal's arms, tears all cried out earlier. "B-but I don't know what to do." his voice is quiet Father... Father taught me everything, I didn't even suspect... I didn't even think it was odd, not until Mister Lanaan did sparring so differently... and then the Trailblazer was doing a c-class... And e-e-even then, I th-thought, it was j-just different, j-just a d-different type of training..." He starts shaking again, "N-now... now he's d-d-d-d-dead, my... Sim is in d-danger, and ev-everything is a lie, or it isn't and... I'm so c-confused... how... how could so much change so quickly."
Vishal tightly squeezes as he continues to hug Taran, "I won't say I know exactly what you're going through Taran." Vishal says sincerely, "I don't. All I know is that you need a friend. A rock. And I'm here for you. I know things are so very confusing. And I'll do my best to try and help you get through it. The confusion, the changes, everything. Because that's what friends do." Vishal then chuckles as he says, "Do you think this is how the refugees feel? So very confused with everything changing around them." "Maybe...pr-probably..." Vishal is still tightly hugging Taran, not letting go until he does, "Well....I may not be the best at it but I will be here for you as long as you need me. I'll just have to do my work here." "N-n-no," Taran says, pushing back against Vishal, "Y-you have things to d-d-do, you need to go do them. I'll... Trailblazer R-Ranari is meeting with me. I d-d-don't want to keep you, you s-s-said you were going home right? Th-that's, you should do th-that.. don't... don't w-worry about me..." "I can do my work here." Vishal replies letting Taran goes as he pushes back, "It's probably better. It'll keep me from running to Dulamul. Besides....what kind of friend would I be if I left you."
"I-I-I d-don't know" Taran says standing up, "Are-are th-there different types? B-b-but that d-d-doesn't matter. You, you should go, see y-your f-f-family. I-I'll k-keep busy... I n-n-need to d-do sh-shifts at the m-m-medical ward, and Tr-trailblazer Ranari s-said to meet her f-for sp-special tr-training, and I n-need to m-make supplies and find reagents and . and you have your own s-stuff to d-do... I'd... w-w-wouldn't I b-be a bad f-f-friend f-f-for t-taking up your time? " "Not if I'm freely giving it to you." Vishal replies wisely. He then shrugs and says, "You know....you can always come with me. A change of scenery might be good. I'm sure my parents would be happy to have you." "I'm, um, I'm s-s-supposed to meet with Tr-trailblazer Ranari..." Taran said, "e-e-everyday, I think, I... um, I know the p-portals are qu-quick but... that might be too much. I'll... here will b-b-be the same as there...f-f-for me..." he shrugs. Then he looks at Vishal, thinking of a way to change the topic, "Y-y-you n-never answered m-me... you were, you were looking for me, right? D-d-do you need me t-t-to make you s-something else? I don-don't think you w-w-would have run out of soap yet... um, d-d-did something c-c-come up?"
Vishal sighs as he gives into the topic changes, "I need your measurements actually." Taran blinks. "Wh-what sort of m-measurements?" "Legs, chest, waist, shoulders, the whole shebang." Vishal replies. "I-I th-thought, y-you weren't m-making me armor, a-after I..." he gestures to the still relatively new Studded Leather. A set of armor Vishal might realize he has yet to see Taran take off. Vishal blushes as he puts his hands behind his head and said, "Well I got hit by some inspiration while waiting on out last mission so.....slight change of plans." "Oh, um, o-okay." Taran looks around the room, "Um, here?" "All my tools do so are in here so that'd be preferred. I just need you to strip down so I can get some accurate readings." Taran shrugs, and starts taking off his armor. Revealing the stained and torn underclothes that are almost more of a collection of sewn together rags than actual clothing. Rags that likely had been thrown out for getting too torn up. Including leggings that sort of just stop around his knees. Taran makes sure to fold and stack his armor neatly off to the side, and turns to look at Vishal "U-um, wh-where do you w-want me to s-stand?"
“Over there is fine.” Vishal replies as he points to the middle of the room and gets his measuring tape and some paper and ink ready, not really paying attention to Taran. Taran moves to stand over there. As Taran turns around and Vishal turns to face himVishal’s face turns completely red as he says, “Taran. You’re....ummm....well....I can see your whole butt.” "Oh, s-s-sorry" Taran says looking down at the strip of cloth. "I'll t-try to f-find time to p-patch it up." Vishal a little distracted says, “Yeah. Ummm....how about I take you clothes shopping. We can do it while selling the other things.” "Um," Taran fidgets a bit, "w-wouldn't th-that be a waste? I-I s-still have some fishing l-line, it, um, it should hold up b-better th-than the thread did." Vishal shakes his head and composes himself before he goes to Taran’s front and starts measuring from there, “I think it’s time for new clothes. I know a nice shop let me take you.”
"B-but, I-I have clothes, an-and I c-can sew th-these up a little more, w-we sh-should save our money, f-for the mission, and for supplies. Medicines, that s-sort of thing" As Vishal begins measuring, he likely notices the scars, dozens of them, along Taran's back and shoulders. The one on his chest is huge, a white line stretched across his entire chest, while others look like knots, whorls and spots from punctures. Vishal does his best not to stare at the scars and doesn’t make any remarks about them as he says, “Taran. New clothes will make you feel nice. Trust me. You’re lucky I’m not dragging you to the baths as well. Now there’s no arguing with me on this one. I’ll let you win not having me glued to your side. But you’re not winning this. We’re getting you new clothes.” "I-I d-don't need to feel nice, Vishal," Taran says, "It-it's more important to m-make sure we have the th-things we need. So that e-everyone else m-makes it back a-alive from the mission."
“Taran. Everyone will be fine. I believe in your skills and mine. Plus it’ll cost like a gold maybe two. We’re getting you new clothes. You don’t need to live like you’re fighting to survive everyday.” "T-t-t-two gold?" Taran's eyes go huge, "on c-clothes? V-Vishal, sir, th-that's f-far to much, I th-thought a few silver, maybe, I-I can't spend that m-much on something like that. Th-that's c-crazy, I'll j-just patch this up, it, it isn't a b-big deal." “Two gold is nothing.” Vishal replies as he continues to take measurements. “And I already said I’m doing it and there’s no arguing out of it. You can either come with me to help pick out. Or I’ll pick them out myself, put them in your room, and then steal your old clothes and burn them so you have to wear the new stuff.” "You-you wouldn't" Taran says, "Vishal, two g-g-gold is almost two weeks wages for m-most people. I-you-I c-c-can't let you sp-spend that k-kind of money on me, it-it wouldn't be right and" he's clutching at straws, desperate to find something to prevent this, "and, s-s-something that nice, it'd, it'd just g-get ruined under my armor. Two Gold on something th-that'd j-just g-get ruined. Vishal, th-that's insane." “Well I guess I’m insane. And I’m going to do it. The clothes will be fine on you. Trust me.” "I-I do trust you, b-but..." Taran trails off, not sure what to say to change Vishal's mind.
Vishal and Taran: Part 2
“Good. We can stop after selling things.” Vishal replies as he finishes the measurements. He then blushes as he adds, “If it makes you feel better it can be considered something for the team in a weird way.” He then laughs nervously as he says, “You’re totally my type Taran. If we weren’t on a team I’d probably be flirting a lot with you. And now I’m going to be distracted knowing I can catch a sneak peak below the armor in your current clothes. And new clothes will let me know I can’t catch a peak.” "Oh, um, o-okay" Taran says clearly confused, "I'll... put on my armor, then." Vishal chuckles nervously as he adds, “Sorry. I...umm...yeah. I hope that knowledge doesn’t change anything.” "N-no, we sh-should be serious on missions, and always pr-prepared. So, I get why flirting is out. I'm not s-sure what you would be peeking at, but... if it's a problem... I'm sorry I-I didn't f-fix it before." Taran shrugs into the chest piece of his armor. "I-I'm not sure what type is, people say it sometimes about beautiful people or strong p-people, but, I-I'm not like that, s-so, if y-you were g-giving me a c-compliment, thank you?"
Vishal blushes some more as he explains, “Your butt. I would be attempting to get peaks at that. And yes it was a complement.” He then goes on to explain, “I mean....being physically attractive is a perk but it’s not what draws me in. It’s your quietness. Your kindness. Your inner strength. You’re really strong Taran. Maybe not as physically as other and you look down at your skills. But that’s not what matters are attracts me. It’s the quiet confidence to do what has to be done. To put others first. To always be kind and generous. That’s my type.” Taran drops the piece of armor he was holding, momentarily off-balance again, as he blushes scarlet. "W-w-w-w-w-ait, y-y-you're a-a-att-attracted to me? L-l-like, l-l-love and s-s-stuff?" Vishal blushes and nervously laughs, “Well....yeah. It’s....it’s more a crush than love but yeah. It’s...it’s part of why I went straight to Dulamul. He has a lot of the same traits and it keeps me from you.”
Taran stares, with his mouth hanging open, mind whirring. "W-w-wait, what d-d-does flirting mean then? I th-thought it was just when people were, you know, t-talking together and laughing and having fun, how-how does that connect to-to... what?" “Yeah. You can describe it like that. But there’s also a lot of subtext. A lot of physical touches and looks. And...well a feeling.” Vishal then starts to look a little worried as he says, “I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have told you. Since....well I’m pretty sure the Road members don’t let them date each other. It’s...another reason why I’ve been focusing and flirting with Dulamul.”
Taran sits with a thump, head reeling. "I-I had no idea, oh gods Vishal, did I accidentally flirt with Sim? I-I c-can't remember, and I didn't want her to know how I felt, I-I thought when people f-f-fell in love they, they just told each other, I-I didn't know... " It's clear Taran is only partially hearing what Vishal is saying, especially since the next leap in logic is, "W-wait, t-touching? W-what kind of touching?" He looks at Vishal, who might realizing just how innocent Taran is in the arena of love and dating, "I-I touch p-people all the time in the medical ward, is-is there a certain way? H-have I been flirting without realizing it? Why butts? I-I, don't you just go up to someone, say you love them and then get married?"
Vishal comes over and says, “Calm down Taran. Calm down. One question at a time. Yes you may have accidentally flirted, it happens. The touching has to be intentional. It’s lingering touches and touches in places other people don’t. Medical ward is different. There’s no attraction. That’s purely to help them get better. Butts is a personal preference. And no. You don’t no just go up to someone declare love and then get married. That’s not how it works.” Innocently Taran replies, "But... That's h-how it w-w-worked in the play..." Vishal smiles as he explains, “Real relationships don’t work like plays. Plays are sped up so the audience doesn’t get board. Relationships take time. Becoming friends. And then saying your feeling and hoping they return it. Then dating. And after you’ve been dating you say I love you and if you both say it then you get married.”
"Oh..." Taran says, calming down, "S-so.. She, she probably doesn't realize... Since it is... really c-complicated..." "Um.. S-s-sorry for freaking out... I, um, that... I wasn't... Todays been a d-day for learning all k-kinds of things I guess." Taran fidgets with his armor straps for a minute. "Um... Seriously though, why butts? Is it b-because it is the biggest muscle on the body?" Vishal chuckles before saying, “I think a good butt can make someone really attractive. Maybe it has to do with being gay. I don’t really know. I just know I find them really attractive. And a butt relatively big compared to the person is really nice. So maybe it’s because the biggest muscle. I do know you have a nice and distracting one.” "O-okay. Um, thanks I guess? I-maybe it i-is a medical thing, but" Taran shrugs, "Bodies j-just are, I know you h-have strong hips an-and defined calves, it-it's a d-dancer thing right? B-but..." He shrugs, "that's just a fact, n-nothing really s-special." He finishes putting on his armor. "Um... Sh-should I do something to em-emphasize my butt, since you like it? Or the opposite so I don't distract you d-during a mission, sir?"
Vishal smiles and laughs as he says, “Emphasizing it or not is up to you. It’s yours not mine. If you want to there are clothes that’ll do that. Speaking of which, it’s time to sell those swords and get you some clothes still.” "Oh... I f-forgot... M_maybe we don't go clothes shopping?" “Nope. We’re still going. Now let’s go.” Taran slumps, but follows Vishal. After selling the new stuff Vishal leads Taran by a familiar looking clothes store. They don’t get in yet as Vishal turns to him and says, “Taran. Are you really that against new clothes? Because I believe they’ll really do you some good. But if you’re that against them that you’re going to slump we won’t grab any.” Taran shrugs, "I-I don't n-need them. It, it would just be to look better, and I-I don't need to look g-good. I, m-my job is to fight, or to work in the m-medical ward... this-" he gestures to the studded leather armor he is wearing, "this is m-more than enough for someone l-like me..." He shakes his head, "B-but, I-I don't want to d-disappoint my s-second only f-friend either, so... if-if you think I should. I'll... I'll spend a little money on c-clothes..."
Vishal smiles as he says, "I'm spending it on you. And yes. New clothes can make you feel really confident. And confidence can really help you out in the field. Trust me. New clothes, new attitude, new you." He then chuckles before saying, "Maybe you can even visit Sim with your new clothes on. Try some flirting." Taran flushes scarlet for a second before withdrawing, "N-n-no, I... it's b-better if she doesn't know... she's... I-I'm not... I'm n-n-not the t-t-type of person she should be with..." He looks up at Vishal with wounded eyes, "Don't...don't tell her, please? She... she sh-shouldn't be with a murderer..." Vishal looks back with eyes of kindness and compassion, "I won't tell her. That's not my place to do so. But Taran. We've all killed in the name of this war. However, that doesn't make us murderers. And you're not a murderer for doing what your Dad told you to do. You're not a murderer, unless, unless you take a joy and pleasure in ending a life. Once that happens. Once you enjoy the killing, then you're a murderer." Taran breaks eye contact first, "L-l-let's g-get the c-clothes," he says instead, "I-I d-don't want to keep you t-too long." And with that he'd step past Vishal and into the shop. Vishal follows.
Vishal and Taran: Part 3
The shopkeeper gives you all a warm smile. "Hello, what can I get you?" Vishal smiles and says, “Hello again. We’re just clothes shopping and getting him a new outfit and I’m looking for a new shirt for a friend as well.” "Excellent. What sort of outfit, and what kind of shirt?" "Um, I-um, i-it r-really d-doesn't need to be anything special, s-something cheap, th-that will last..." He looks at Vishal and then to the side of the shopkeeper, "Th-that's f-fine right?" Vishal speaks up as he says “You’re wearing it so it’s up to you.” However he seems to go in it more as if he’s thought about this and says, “But as we need undergarments and everything I was thinking some nice ones that show off your assets. And then some black leggings and a simple white tank top and that’s your normal undergarments to your armor. And then so you don’t have to wear your leather armor all the time some simple nice blue denim maybe a little fade washed with a simple v cut t-shirt in your favorite color followed by a nice light jacket over it in a complimentary color.”
Taran stares a bit agape at Vishal for a second, "U-um, b-b-but I need to wear my armor all the time. Wh-what if th-there is an attack, or an emergency mission? I-I have to ready." Vishal replies, “I make armor Taran. Trust me. In case of an emergency what I’m recommending for clothes will be enough. Plus armor isn’t made to me wore all the time." "B-but, I-I do wear my ar-armor all the time? It-it works fine, I just make sure to oil it and check th-the straps. It... it works fine..." He looks over at the shop owner, "N-n-not that I think your cl-clothes are b-bad or anything, but... th-they aren't meant for f-fighting in or working in the m-m-medical ward." Vishal replies, “Taran. You don’t have to be a soldier all the time. You don’t have to wear your armor all the time. Nice civilians clothes are good. And leather armor doesn’t take that long to get into.” "S-sixty seconds, af-after I run to g-get it," Taran says, "Th-that c-c-could g-get..." he trailed off, deflating. "I-I... if you w-want, V-Vishal..." he'd say.
Vishal let’s out his own defeated sigh before saying, “It’s your clothes Taran. It’s your choice. I’m just tying to let you know you don’t have to think like your Dad taught you. You don’t have to worry about being ambushed every second. There are plenty of defenses in place that’ll give you plenty of notice ahead of time.” He then thinks for a moment before saying, “I’ll talk to my psionsmith. He’s talked about armor that doffs in the push of a button. Maybe there’s some magical way to get armor that dons the same way.” "I'm s-sorry," Taran says not looking at Vishal, "I-I kn-know you want this t-to be g-good and f-fun and... and I'm just... n-n-not, even when I'm t-trying not to, I-I'm just making it h-hard on you, f-fighting with you. I-I'll just l-let you pick it out..." “It’s fine Taran. I’m not going to lie and say I wouldn’t like for you to at least try the civilian clothes. But we can just get the simple undergarments. It’s fine.”
"B-b-b-but it isn't," Taran's voice is rough, "I-I want what he wanted, I'm th-thinking like he told me to, I'm-I'm not normal, if-if I was normal then you c-could have j-just had fun t-t-taking me sh-shopping instead of this." He grabs his hair, "I c-can't want what I want, b-because that was what he wanted, b-but you want me to want what I want a-and you don't want to force me to g-get normal things th-that I should want. I-I'm too twisted up, I c-can't even tell..." He lets his arms fall limp, "J-just... t-tell me what to do..." Vishal can't tell if Taran is talking to him, or something else. Vishal doesn't really know what to do. What do you do when you're friend is having an identity crisis and a break down right before your eyes. Turning to the shop keep he says, "Get what I asked. Make the shirt gray and the jacket black. The extra shirt make a deep v-neck and a forest green. Wrap it all up but keep the green shirt separate." He then turns all his attention to Taran and pulls the man into another hug and says, "Its okay. All you have to do right now is breath. Just breath and listen to my heart. That's all you need to do right now."
The shopkeep begins getting clothes and placing them into bundles. Taran shudders against Vishal, breathing ragged. "N-n-n-not green... please... not green" he'll whisper, the pain and horror obvious in his cracking voice. Vishal begins to rub soothing circles on his back as he says, "Shhh....its okay. The green isn't for you." Taran nods jerkily. Continuing to gently rub Taran's back Vishal tells him, "After this. Let's return to my room. I think it's best if you lay down and take a nap. Okay?" "I-I...o-okay..." Taran responds. Vishal then looks towards the shopkeeper and seeing all their stuff ready he says, "I'm going to let go and grab out stuff. Then we're going back to my room. I'll be right back." Vishal tells Taran as he lets go and goes to quickly pay for the clothes. Taran doesn't really react, just stares out as the thoughts tumble around him. "Two and a half gold," the shopkeep informs Vishal quietly. Vishal quickly pays for the clothes, grabs them while giving the man a quiet "Thank you" before grabbing Taran's hand as he leads him back toward's Vishal's room. Taran follow meekly. "I'm sorry, Vishal..." he says quietly, "It's... it's all been today... all of it..." "Hey, hey. You don't need to apologize. It's been a rough day. Just let me take care of you for a little bit. You can nap and then we'll talk once you wake up, okay?" Vishal replies calmly. "Okay..."
Vishal and Taran: Part 4
As they reach the inside of Vishal's room he makes sure to close and lock it behind him. Putting the clothes on a dresser he says, "Go ahead and lay down on my bed. I'll be here when you wake up." Taran lays down, fully armored, and stares at the ceiling. After a few minutes, he's fidgeting. "Is something the matter?" Vishal asks as he see's Taran fidget around. "J-just... th-there's so much to do...I-I.. I feel like I'm wasting time... th-that I should be doing stuff." Taran replies. "Taran. You've had a hard day. You've had a lot dropped on you at once. It's not safe to work when you're mind is occupied and reeling. Now I want you to relax and take a nap." Vishal's voice is showing concern and care but also trying to come at it from a rational side because he thinks that'll help Taran agree to it.
"Everyone al-always says that, that I can't keep working if I'm tired, or hurt, or confused... I used to think... it w-was because people th-thought I was still weak. Th-that they thought I still needed to get stronger..." "That wasn't it though, was it? Other people... th-they just aren't used to it. When I br-brewed my first healing potion, in Master Lukaan's class... I hadn't eaten for days... I hadn't realized the animals h-had figured out my traps... My first time in the medical ward? My st-stitches broke open, on my abdomen, I was bleeding everywhere... but no one noticed, because the soldiers we were treating were bleeding so much..." He holds up his hand, staring at it, "They were always steady. I-I-I could shake and shiver and tremble as much as I wanted... but my hands had to be steady. And they always are." He lets his hand fall back to the bed, "Tired, bleeding, starving, why is th-this any d-different?"
"It's not because they thought you were weak Taran." Vishal says, deciding on something as he begins to change out of his armor and into his own civilian clothes. "It's because they were concerned for you. Concerned you were pushing yourself too hard, too fast, too much and that you might die. Nobody wants that." Once he is done changing into his civilian clothes he makes his way towards the bed and crawls in next to Taran. "It's true you can be trained to ignore physical things like being tired and bleeding and all that. You've probably been trained to ignore those for a while. But this is more than something physical. This is mental and emotional. And that hurts just as much and you can't just ignore it. Because the more you do, the worst it gets." "I th-think I need to tell Mr. Dr-Druhdaar," Taran says suddenly, moving to give Vishal room on the bed, "He... he looks up to F-F-F-Father... he respects him, th-that's why... why he l-l-looked out for me, t-told me to be s-stronger, l-like Father was..." "I... It will hurt him... b-but I need to t-tell him, d-don't I?"
Vishal grabs Taran's hand so he cannot leave as he says, "You probably should. But now isn't the time. Let's get you in a better place first. Okay?" Taran nods, he wasn't trying to leave, just giving Vishal room, but he doesn't let go of his hand. "I d-don't even kn-know where he is," he reminds Vishal. "Right. I kind of forgot he's on his own mission for a little bit." Vishal replies as gently rubs Taran's hand. "Hopefully he'll be back soon." "I-I think he's m-meeting us in Tashalatora... or n-near the monolith." Taran replies. "Okay. You can tell him then. And I'll be there for you the entire way." Taran goes back to staring at the ceiling of the room.
"If you're having trouble sleeping, I climbed in the bed so you can continue to listen to my heart. The rhythm should help." Vishal offers. "Maybe... I-I've n-never slept with someone before" Taran is still keeping his distance, not next to Vishal, just in the same bed. "Well you'll never know until you try. Come on." Vishal says with a smile. "Ok," Taran will awkwardly scoot closer to Vishal, feeling himself press up against the other man. Vishal smiles, "It's alright. I may like you but I'm not going to do anything. My Mom use to do this to me when I was upset and couldn't sleep. It helps a lot." "Do anything? Wh-what are you t-talking about..." Taran asks, though as close as they are Vishal would feel him tense up at the word Mom. "Oh...sorry. I...that's a touchy subject." Vishal replies as he feels the tensing up, "And by do anything I mean feel you up inappropriately. Touch areas I'm not suppose to." "Oh, th-the flirting st-stuff..." Taran responds, a littler slower, "Didn't... didn't even think a-about that. I'm... I'm not... if I do something wr-wrong, let me know? I'm just... th-this is different. Being so close to someone else, for so long..." "Don't worry, you're doing just fine. And...I hope this is helping. Even if you're not use to it." "Maybe..." Taran says. A few minutes later, Vishal might notice Taran having fallen asleep.
After about two hours, Taran would wake back up. Feeling unusually warm. Vishal hasn't moved from his spot and as he see's Taran waking up he says, "Good morning. How are you feeling?" Taran hesitates... "B-b-better." "Okay. That's good. And I'm glad that helped." Vishal replies sincerely before asking, "Do you....perhaps want to talk more? I understand you're going through a lot and you've been talking a lot. But I do think it's the best way to process everything." "I-I really should g-go," Taran says, starting to get up, "I-I've t-taken a l-lot of your t-time, and I s-still have t-to go b-buy s-supplies." "L-l-like I-I s-said... at th-the very least, I-I kn-know I h-have to protect Sim... and w-we'll need e-every tool t-t-to do that."
"Okay. Please. Come find me if you need anything. I'll be in Whitemouth for a day or two and then Malshashar. Don't hesitate Taran. Please. I'll give you time and space to think but....if it's too much please come seek me out." It is evident that Vishal is practically pleading with him as he says this, before he quietly adds, "And...don't forget your clothes." "I w-won't," he says grabbing the outfit of black and grey. "Th-thank you, V-vishal, I-I know y-you p-probably haven't used all th-the soap yet, but, um, s-since it-it isn't a surprise any more... I-is th-there a s-smell you'd r-really like? For the n-next one?" Vishal answers with, "The coffee one is probably my favorite. I won't use it to wash my body but I love the smell of it." Taran replies, "O-okay, I c-can do other smells, I might even b-be able to make you an oil, or something. J-just for the s-smell" "That would be great. But as long as you keep making stuff I'll keep using them." Taran will nod and head for the door. Vishal lets him go and says, "May the Light guide you Taran. And....please reach out if you need to." "M-may the Lady of S-Storms keep you safe." Would be his only response as the door shuts behind him.
Vishal's private conversation with Ranari:
Ranari is sitting at the table when you come in. "Vishal. Is this about Dulamul?"
“Yeah. I want to know how he was and if he’s still here.” Vishal replies
"He did fairly well. Expressed some interest in the light chambers, as well as learning how to read. He's not here anymore, he left yesterday for a village about five miles away. He should be there by now."
Vishal smiles. “That’s good. Am I allowed to know what village?”
"Certainly. It's called Whitemouth, named for its proximity to a limestone cave. There's a large population of shifters there, most born in Adar whose ancestors fled Riedra, but a few new refugees who were born into the Taskaan Legion like Dulamul."
Vishal nods and puts on a little bit of a forced smile, “That’s good. He sounded like he liked that one. To be with his people like him. I’m sure they can help him a lot.”
"He did seem interested in meeting other shifters who had escaped Riedra, and seeing the kind of life they could make." Ranari gives you a direct look. "He also asked if it would be difficult for you to visit."
Vishal’s eyes light back up a little with some hope, “Really? I mean....as long as I’m preparing for the mission I don’t see why it would be.”
Ranari raises an eyebrow. "No, I don't see why it would be," she says with a faint smile.
Vishal happily nods before saying, “Thank you for keeping an eye on him. I know you have more important things to do. But I really appreciate you doing me the favor.”
"Of course, Vishal." Ranari gives you a warm smile. "I was happy to make sure he was all right."
Vishal’s expression changes to one of curiosity as he then proceeds to ask, “Do you know where Lanan happened to land as well?”
Ranari frowns briefly. "Lanan is...still adjusting. It's not an uncommon reaction for ex-soldiers. However, he expressed interest in the Ghoza fortress, by the water, and is currently traveling their with the thickest-skinned guide we could find."
Vishal nods before saying, “Thank you. I want to make sure he’s not isolating himself. He’s kind of a brooder and wouldn’t have any friends if I didn’t speak up.”
Ranari snorts. "He's very busy being a cynical son of a *****. But maybe the inventions and innovations at Ghoza will spark his energy again."
Vishal chuckles as he says, "He's just prickly. But gives really great advise and is actually a good friend. Just gotta get past that exterior and find something to motivate him."
"That's what we hope Ghoza will do. He seems to actually have quite the head for strategy and tactics."
"Thats good to hear. I'll let him discover and get settled some before I bother him again. If you see him before I do though tell him he's still my favorite pain in the ass."
"I'll do that." Ranari laughs.
Vishal laughs some before saying, "Unless you have anything you wish to tell me in private. I'm going to take my leave now then. Plenty for me to do and I'm sure you have plenty to do as well."
"Thank you. May the Light guide your path." He replies before leaving.
Caelius's Private Conversation:
Ranari holds you behind as the others leave. "Caelius, what is it?"
Caelius blinks before opening his book and spelling out “Do We Need To Go T-H-R-O-U-G-H The M-A-N-I-F-E-S-T Z-O-N-E?”
Ranari shakes her head. "You don't," she says reassuringly. "You shouldn't need to go closer to it than the two miles the monolith is from it."
Caelius makes a face, one of both intense worry and discomfort for a split second before readjusting to a look of mild worry. He nods, and spells out “Thank You.”
Ranari gives you a reassuring smile. "I know about your history with Mabar, Caelius," she says gently. "I promise, you won't even be close enough to see Mabar-touched creatures."
Caelius zones out once she says Mabar, he snaps back and nods. He flips the page and points to a phrase, “May you always walk along the Path of Light.”
"And you as well," she answers.
Caelius bows slightly before walking swiftly out of the room.
Taran's Private Conversation:
Ranari tracks you down as you finish dropping your stuff off in your room and are getting ready to go shopping. "Taran? Did you want to speak to me?"
Taran freezes, "U-um... that is... I-I'm, to be honest, not that I w-w-would n-normally lie t-to you tr-trailblazer, but th-this is, well..."
"I-I'm s-scared to." He'd say in a tiny voice, "Y-you s-said you'd be l-l-looking into Father... If-if I d-d-don't talk to you, it-it remains a mystery. He d-d-disappeared and I j-just will n-never know wh-what happened..."
He'd grab his arm, trembling a little, "B-b-but, if, if he... if he.... d-d-d-d-didn't make it... I, I don't know if I want to know that... even if there are other things that... that I do want to know..."
Ranari nods seriously. "I looked into it. Why don't you ask me questions, and I'll answer what I can?"
The question sat in his chest, an ugly lump. The question a good son would ask. A strong son.
Taran took a ragged breath, then another, he... start with something easier, simpler...
"C-c-can you tell me, wh-where the m-mission was? I-I know I'm not allowed to know what the mission was, but... can I know where?"
"They were asked to escort a group of refugees from a village through a few dozen miles of hostile territory and into Malshashar. The group was composed mainly of women and children." Ranari frowns. "Do you want me to continue?"
Taran will nod mutely
"Three of the guides died, your father included," Ranari says gently. "I can't give you the details, I'm sorry. The remaining guide retired shortly thereafter."
Taran blinks up at Ranari, not quite sure why he is on the floor, a roaring in his ears. She wavers, like the plains do during the summer, air warping with the rising heat, but everything is cold like the void between stars.
A voice speaks, asking questions, questions that don't really matter but at the same time... "Did they succeed? Did the refugees make it?"
Ranari kneels next to you, offering you her hand. "Yes. All but one got across the border," she says gently.
"That's good," the voice says, as a hand fumbled into Ranari's. Just resting there, like a leaf on a pool. "The mission, that was always the most important thing. More important than anything else, make sure you complete the mission. Complete the mission. Hurt Riedra. Protect Adar. In that order, never forgot. He told me to never forget."
Something wet had fallen on his face, but that didn't matter. "He taught me everything. Everything I was supposed to be. Everything I failed to be. And now he's dead. He died, while I was still a failure."
"Now what do I do?"
"Taran," Ranari says, still in a gentle, reassuring voice. "Come with me for a bit."
Ranari gently leads you through Shalquar until you reach a plaza where kids are running around playing and someone has set up a stall with grilling meat and mushrooms. She brings you over to a bench. "Sit down, Taran."
He'd sit.
He doesn't really see the children or smell the food. Just the roaring in his ears. The endless silent roar
"Taran," Ranari says gently. "I want you to tell me about your father."
"He is a great man," He'd say after a moment, the words slow and quiet, but sounding rehearsed to a strange degree "Strong. A hero. He works hard protecting everyone from the Inspired. He is someone to look up to, someone I strive to be like, even a little."
He keeps talking, staring off a thousand yards at all the things he won't say.
"He escaped from Dor Maleer after my mother betrayed us. He saved my life, taking me across the country and here to Adar. He became a Guide after years of hard work, put through all the tests to prove himself, and he proved himself time and again."
"He is training me, trying to shape me into a warrior, so I can join the Summit Road. He is sacrificing the little time he has here in Adar, the few days or weeks when he is not on missions, trying to make me stronger." Tears flow and Taran's voice breaks, "I'm- I'm- ver-very th-thankful... for sob ev-everything he d-d-d-d-did."
"I don't want you to tell me what you think of him," Ranari says, her voice becoming a little firmer. "I want you to tell me about him. What kind of training you underwent. The sort of things he would tell you. About yourself, about Adar, about Riedra, about the Road. I've heard some...things about him, but I want to hear about him from you."
Taran turns to look at the Trailblazer, a spark of fear striking through the morass of despair and loss.
"I-I..." he starts shaking, "I d-don't... he is a h-hero, he-he d-d-d-d... I c-c-can't... I-I-I w-won't.... he didn't d-do an-anything wrong, I... I don't... he sh-should be r-r-r-r-remembered.... f-for pr-protecting Adar...."
"What you tell me won't affect how he'll be remembered. Someone is remembered for their actions in life, not what is said about them after death."
For a brief, mad second, Taran thought she was lying. That she had told him Father was dead to trick him. But... she is a Trailblazer, she is a hero of Adar. She wouldn't lie. And... if Father really was dead... he couldn't get angry at him, for talking about his training.
He could ask the things that had been yawning beneath him ever since he spared with Lanaan and attended the Trailblazer's class.
"He t-told me... th-that the Road was the only way t-to protect Adar, and that Adar was the only place in the world s-safe from the Inspired. He s-said... he said if we failed, and the R-Riedrans attacked, th-that everyone would be en-enslaved. We w-wouldn't be able to th-think our own thoughts, or dr-dream our own dreams. We'd be slaves. Forever."
Taran looks down at the cobblestones, "I-I asked, wh-what about the people? Of R-Riedra... He said th-they were al-already slaves. B-but then, I-I asked, what a-about us? An-and he g-got an-angry, b-but then he said... s-some p-people are st-strong enough to es-escape, because the Quori h-haven't won, and so th-they aren't s-strong enough yet. B-but if w-we are too weak, th-they'll win, and th-then there w-would be no hope..."
"Th-that's why I-I h-had to train s-so hard... s-so I c-could st-stop being weak..."
"And how did you train so you could stop being weak?"
Taran opened and closed his mouth, but nothing came out. Tremors wracked his body, and tears flowed. He gripped his arms, as if to hold himself together.
He wasn't supposed to tell. Father had said not to tell. If he told... if he told it would be admitting Father was dead. That he was never coming back. That he was all alone.
Except for Sim.
She was in Tashalatora, unaware of the Hanbanali, unaware of the danger.
If he told the Trailblazer no, if he refused to follow orders and talk... would she take him off the mission. Would he be in a prison cell when he heard about the monastery falling, that all the monks were killed or enslaved?
He'd sworn to protect her. He had to speak, or she might be taken by the Inspired, made a soulless, mindless drone in their Dreaming Darkness.
"It-it started with running." He'd say, his voice thick and rough, "I h-had to run to where he said before the hourglass ran out. If I was too slow, I-I didn't get to eat dinner. It got farther and farther. Up the mountains, in the forest. The c-caves were the worst. In the darkness, it was so easy to get lost, and I would get so hungry... I collapsed so many times... I thought, I thought I would die in the d-dark. That I was j-just too weak. Th-then I'd wake up, b-back home. Father had f-found me and brought me back. When I was eight... he had a mission. I was s-supposed to survive two weeks, he'd... he'd left a knife for me."
Taran chuckles, dark and bemused, "W-within the first few days I'd eaten something, some mushrooms I'd found... I was th-throwing up for hours, an-and I was cold, and I hurt. But I m-made it. I survived and wh-when Father got home... he said it was t-time..." He reaches up for the strap to his armor, but then remembers the children playing nearby. Instead he just traces his finger across his chest.
"He said to take the knife, and stab him. I-I said I didn't want to... he had his sword and... it hurt so bad. He-he said I learned two important things. I learned that Hesitation Kills, an-and I learned pain..."
Taran looks Ranari in the eyes, "I w-was a b-bad st-student. A we-weakling. He had to teach me again and again and again. S-s-such simple things. D-don't hesitate. Keep going no matter how much it hurt. He t-t-taught me how to use the dagger. The shortsword. Th-the b-b-bow. He'd go on a mission, be gone for a w-week, two, and I scavenged and foraged, and then he would come home, and we would spar. And... and it wasn't like how you sparred. He-he didn't stop. Not until I passed out, usually from bl-blood loss. Each scar was a lesson. A reminder. When to step back, when to duck, to never drop my weapon, to never stop attacking."
Taran turns back to the children laughing and playing. He'd always wondered what that would be like. "I only hit him once... I'd fallen, maybe I-I'd blacked out... he was reaching down for me, and I stabbed him in the side... He w-was furious. Sc-screaming about how I was b-betraying him. J-just like Mom... I think he almost killed me that day. I was in bed for so long, wrapped in bandages. Even with his healing magic, I couldn't move for days..."
"Th-there's one more th-thing..." Taran says, at a near whisper, "B-b-but... I c-can't... if I sh-show you... If I show you the memory... and... and Father was wr-wr-wrong... and... and I n-n-need to be p-punished.... can... Trailblazer, can you swear... can you swear you'll let me go and protect Tashalatora first? I-I won't run away, I promise, but... I don't want to be in jail... and hear that we failed, and that Sim is... I c-can't... she's... she's too important. Please?"
"I promise I'll let you protect Adar," Ranari says gently. "But I doubt you will need to be punished. Please show me, Taran."
He nods, and then enters the cave, opening his mind to her.
He's 13. Father is walking in front of him, talking about how this is an important test. A true test to see if he understands how important the lessons have been. They come to the cavern. A woman and a girl are chained to the the stalagmites. Father hands him the bow and a single arrow.
He says they are spies, captured trying to sneak into Adar. He knows Taran has been studying the human body, this would be a test of that knowledge. Of the knowledge of medical treatments he was taught.
Kill them both.
He can't protest. He tries but Father has the look in his eyes, the one that spells pain and new scars if he argues. He's shaking so bad, he can barely nock the arrow. It misses. Father cracks his sheathed sword against his shoulders and demands he retrieve the arrow. He's shouting, shouting how they are spies, traitors, how they were going to kill the monks with their powers. They are screaming, struggling against the chains and the gags.
He can't see straight for the second shot. Instead of a clean kill, it lodges in the woman's stomach. Father beats him again. Retrieve the arrow. This is his fault. If he wasn't hesitating they wouldn't be suffering. If he would stop being so weak, they would be dead and it would be over. Her eyes are green, tears and snot running down her face. He can understand her, this close, right next to her as he pulls at the arrow, hands covered in blood.
Begging for her daughter's life.
It takes two more shots. He doesn't know if he finally hit something vital or if she simply died from blood loss. The girl is hysterical. Her wrists are bleeding from ripping them against the chains. The gag falls off, she's screaming, calling them demons, murderers. She isn't using any powers.
He hears Father draw his sword. He sees the shadow against the wall, sees the blade rise behind him.
"Hesitation kills, Son."
.........
The snap of the arrow impacting her skull, the snap of her neck, the snap of the bow string. Green Eyes, staring at him, even so deep in the shadows that he can't hear himself screaming.
In the plaza, Taran is curled up on the bench, sobbing.
"I don't know, I don't know, I don't know."
Ranari gently wraps her arms around you. "It's all right, Taran. It's okay "
He flinches away from her.
Reeling, lost, hating himself and hating his Father whom he mourns for, Taran reaches for something, grasping at a glimmer, a glimmer he would see false if he was in his right mind.
"It- it w-was o-okay?"
Ranari frowns. "Taran. What happened..." She closes her eyes for a moment. "Take a moment to process. Then we'll talk."
Taran rounds on her, grabbing her by the shoulders, drowning, with only this one life line.
"N-N-no, please, I n-n-need to know sob, I need to know if-if they were in-innocent or g-guilt. Am I a soldier or a-a-a..." the last word is a whisper, "murderer."
"I don't know," Ranari says gently. "But I do know that you did what you thought was right. Because of the information your father gave you. But Taran," Ranari lifts his head a little. "You are not a bad person. You want to help people. I want to help you relearn the best way to do that."
All strength leaves Taran, the tears have stopped, though his eyes hurt with the want of more tears to shed.
"Everything was a lie, wasn't it? Father was a bad person. I killed people. I hurt them. I hurt you, because of how he trained me. What if... what if I hurt other people... How will I... what am I supposed to do..."
Ranari places a hand on your shoulder. "I'm going to help you with that."
Taran nods and askes quietly, "Wh-what do you w-w-want me to do, Madam Tr-Trailblazer?"
"First of all. In between missions, you're going to spend some time training with another trainer, depending on where you are. Someone who can help you sort out what you need to. This time, I'll help with that. But by the time you get back from your current mission, I'll have found someone who can take on the role in a more long-term fashion."
"O-Okay," Taran wipes his face with his arm, "I'll d-do what you ask... Um, I, I can take my normal training time and extend it a-a little, and st-still have time for gathering reagents, creating the s-supplies we need and w-working at l-least nine hours in the m-medical ward.... Um, w-would you rather I m-meet you in the morning Madam Tr-Trailblazer, since y-you have cl-classes in the evening?"
Ranari looks thoughtful. "We can figure that out in a moment. For now, let me ask you. Why do you fight for the Road? There is no wrong answer here."
Taran flushes, embarrassed because despite what she says, he knows his answer is wrong now.
"B-because Father told me to. Because it is the on-only way to protect people from the Inspired. So that they," he gestures to the children and the normal people laughing in the plaza (though a few might be staring at the boy breaking down and sobbing) "can be free and happy and not mindless slaves with no hopes or dreams..."
Ranari smiles. "That's why most people in the Road are a part of it. To defend the innocents from the Dreaming Dark. You see, Taran, you are a good person, no matter what your father said. The first step to this is understanding that."
Taran nods, but he isn't fully convinced
Ranari nods. "Right now, I'll give you some time to process. I think midafternoon would make a good time to meet, if that is all right with you?"
"I'll b-b-be there whenever you w-want me to ma'am." Taran says, completely serious, "I'll adjust everything else to f-fit it in." "Um," he blushes again, emotions running high, "where d-d-do you want me to meet you, madam Trailblazer?"
"How about back at the room you debriefed in?"
Taran blinks, "Isn't that..." he hesitates, but asks anyways, "Isn't that.. s-small for training?"
"I'll bring you to the room we'll use so that you can find it more easily."
"That sounds perfect. Stay with your friends, Taran. They can help more than you can imagine," Ranari says gently.
"I-I don't kn-know if we are f-friends..." Taran says, "I d-don't talk to them much, not really, I just... try and stay out of the way. To be u-useful in the fight a-against the Inspired... "
"You're very useful," Ranari says firmly. "From what I've heard, you were key in taking down the patrol."
Taran shrugs, "A-a-anyone could have thrown the M-morningstar. I-I wouldn't be surprised if there is an alchemist here in Shalquar that can make them. I just... I can't do magic, I don't have a connection to the Quori... so... I just try to do as much as I can... even if it is only little things..."
"Your worth in Adar is not determined by your ability to do magic or connect to quori," Ranari says flatly. "We don't work like that here-everyone is considered to have equal potential, and what you have done with yours is more than impressive."
"I'm sorry ma'am," Taran says hanging his head, "It's just... Father...he always said I was worthless. Th-that I c-couldn't do anything right... So... what I can do... I always thought.... it couldn't be very impressive. P-people w-would be nice about it, of course, but... if I could do it... anybody could..."
"You are a very capable young man, Taran."
He'd nod, wondering about... everything
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Training With Ranari:
Part 1:
After buying the supplies he thought they would need, things for the mission, Taran had lain in bed, struggling to fall asleep. He knew the reasons, but he kept making new ones. The mid-morning nap, laying with Vishal, he blamed all of them for a time, trying to pave over the broken ground in his soul.
He woke the next morning with a plan, a schedule that kept him busy, kept him moving. Maybe that was what He would have wanted from him, but it was also normal. Normal was smooth, smooth would keep him quick, and if he was quick, they could save Tashalatora from utter destruction. That mattered.
He dressed quickly, and set out for the Medical Ward. Leaving the green beret in his bag. Signing in and volunteering. And maybe it was having a plan, maybe it was simply experience on the floor, but there was a quickness to his step that hadn't been there the last time (cunning action) and as he lost himself in the flow of work, of stitching wounds, of changing bandages and grinding medicine, he felt... light.
Too quickly for his taste, fourteenth bell approached. He had barely worked for eight bells, but, he had to meet with Ranari. He set out, pulling the jacket on over his leather armor. He had kept it in his bag to prevent it from getting blood on it. The material was more absorbent than his armor, after all. He left the green beret in the bag, staring up at him from the darkness.
He arrives at the room, a little before fourteenth bell.
Ranari's already in the room, working on a sheet of paper that looks like a form. She glances up with a smile. "Taran. You're early! Come in and have a seat."
"I-I-'m s-sorry I-I k-kept you waiting Tr-Trailblazer," he says sitting down in a seat , the new jacket bunches up behind him and he has to take a moment to adjust it, "I-I'll try t-t-o arrive ea-earlier t-tomorrow, I-I know y-you're very busy."
Ranari shakes her head. "I just said you were early, Taran," she reminds you gently. "I want you to come on time, a few minutes in either direction doesn't matter. I use a large variety of rooms in the monastery for dull things like paperwork, I'm just using this one today because I was already going to be in here."
"Oh," he says, "O-okay." he fidgets as he sits, keeping his gaze down, so he doesn't accidentally see any of the papers the Trailblazer is working on.
Ranari slips the papers into a folder, which she closes carefully. "Taran. Look at me, please."
He looks up at her, not making eye contact
"In my eyes, please," she says gently
He looks her in the eyes, and his breathing speeds up a hair, anxiety mostly
"Now. Today we're mostly going to focus on giving you a way to calm down when you're nervous, all right? To ground yourself."
"O-okay, um, I-I, um, I-I d-d-don't g-get nervous when I'm f-flowing though, a-and w-won't I b-be tr-training? S-so, I-I'll be o-okay... Madam Tr-trailblazer"
"This isn't just going to be weapons training. It going to be training of the sort most guides undergo, which involves knowing how to calm yourself under any circumstances, for example."
"oh" Taran says in a small voice, shoulders slumping a little, then he straightens up, a strained little smile on his face, "O-of c-course Trailblazer, I-I'm ready when y-you are."
"Okay. We're going to start by just helping you practice your breathing, all right?"
"O-okay"
"I want you to practice this pattern in breathing, focusing wholly on it. In for two counts, out for four."
Taran nods and starts the breathing, in for two, out for four, in for two out for four.
He steps back, going with the rhythm of his breath, stilling like a predator laying wait. In, out, this was the way of the hunter, there was no prey to wait on though, no beast walking down the mountain trail, or soldier patrolling. Perhaps there was someone else in the room though, hiding. Slow, in, out, scanning the room, stretching his senses, what was he missing, what wasn't he seeing.
Ranari watches you carefully as you fall into the rhythm. The silence stretches for one minute, two, more.
He couldn't detect anything, and it built in him, but he couldn't let the frustration out, that would be noise, motion, ruin the stealth.
Wait, that was all he could do, he didn't know for what, but he had to wait, stay still, wait, breath in, breath out, something would happen, he had to be ready. A twinge was beginning in his back, sitting was a poor angle for a long wait, slowly he stretched his shoulder up, working the muscles, keeping them loose.
Wait, breath, watch.
After nearly five minutes, Ranari speaks. "Tell me about that."
At Ranari's sudden voice, he twitches, breathing hitching and rhythm lost.
"U-um, s-sorry?" Taran asks, "I-I-I w-w-was just... i-it was like w-when I h-hunt, th-the br-breathing, th-that's wh-what it is s-supposed to be like, right? B-breathing, g-going still, w-waiting?"
"No, not watching," Ranari corrects gently. "Then you're focusing on something other than just the breathing. The idea here is to relax, Taran. To just breathe."
"B-but, w-what am I d-doing then?"
"Relaxing. Recentering your mind. If it helps, think of this as a way to resist mind games from the Inspired. Staying relaxed allows you to marshal your defenses in the best possible way."
"S-s-so, I-I sh-should th-think of d-defending? W-without m-moving, like th-the mountains?"
"No. You shouldn't be thinking about anything. If you allow your mind to be distracted by thinking about defense, or offense, or anything else, it'll detract from your focus on relaxing."
"I-I'm s-sorry," Taran says looking down, "I-I don't un-understand. Y-you w-want me to d-do n-nothing?"
Ranari nods. "Exactly. Nothing but breathe."
"O-okay, I-I'll try."
Taran starts breathing, two in, four out, two in four out. He starts stepping back, settling into the flow of the hunter, but that isn't right, those aren't his orders.
Nothing. He has to do nothing. But where is that? Three in three out. The rhythm breaks, he focuses on fixing it, two in, four out. Nothing, where could he find... one in two out, his breathing speeds up, he knows, but he doesn't want to go there.
Orders, do nothing. He has to, two in, four out, two in, four out. Don't step back. Go down. Down into the center of the Maelstrom, his breathing is erratic all over the place, but he focuses, down further, further. Keep the rhythm, two, four, two four, sink down, down.
It doesn't watch. It doesn't listen. It breathes. It is nothing.
Ranari is quiet for about five minutes, then speaks softly. "Taran? How are you?"
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Ranari gently puts a hand on your shoulder.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Ranari taps your shoulder, hard, a faint frown on her face.
A ripple nearly breaks the pattern, It focuses, keeping steady
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Two in, four out.
Ranari nods, then closes her eyes for a moment. You feel a prod at your mind, tentative first, gentle.
It doesn't respond, It holds the pattern. Two in, four out. Far below, deep, there may be a spark, but It holds the pattern.
Ranari sighs, nibbles her lip for a moment as if deciding what to do, then takes out her papers and goes back to them.
Ranari finishes her papers, closes her eyes, and gives you the mental equivalent of a slap across the face.
Taran lurches back, falling out of the chair, dagger slicing through the air, everything aches, and the sudden change in breathing catches in his chest.
He ends up on the ground, eyes wild, coughing and clutching his dagger in one hand
Ranari rises and offers you a hand up, apparently unfazed by the dagger in your hand.
Taran winces as he backs up, pulling himself up but not taking Ranari's hand as his eyes dart around the room, terrified
"Whcough what h-happened, wh-why... I-I'm st-stiff and... wh-what was that, w-was that a t-t-test, a-are w-we..."
"No test. You were doing quite well, but maybe a little too into the whole "doing nothing" thing. That could be a good emergency psychic defense, but let's also try and get you a way to relax without completely disengaging from your surroundings."
"I-I d-don't un-understand.." Taran says, still backed away and rubbing his sore muscles, kneading feeling back into them.
Ranari kneels on the ground. "You were...very disengaged from everything. It looked like a highly intensified version of the relaxed mental state we use to get psions in training in touch with their power by avoiding outside distractions. But it was highly intensified, so we're going to try and find a way to just relax you without disengaging you from everything."
"O-o-okay... um, wh-what do y-you want me to do? "
Part 2:
"Sit down again, next to me." Ranari gestures at the chair next to hers.
Taran heads over to the chair, sitting down next to Ranari, awkwardly adjusting the jacket again as it bunches up behind him
Ranari nods and looks at you. "All right, Taran. This isn't going to be easy, but I need you to pull back if you feel yourself tipping into nothing. So breathe with me, focusing on my voice. Two in, four out."
Taran nods, listening to Ranari, breathing two in and four out.
He feels himself starting to sink, but he pulls back, listening to the Trailblazer's voice. It's a struggle, but he tries to find an equilibrium, not letting the pattern drag him down again
After a few minutes, Ranari nods. "Okay, that's enough. Was that better?"
"U-um, I-I g-guess. I-it was really h-hard, st-staying up while counting. Listening to you m-made it easier, but, I d-don't think I c-could do i-it without you"
Ranari nods. "It's a start. Okay, now the next part of this, we are going to need a training room for." She rises from her seat.
Taran stands and follows her,
"I'm s-s-sorry I'm s-still... I-I w-wish I w-was doing better, Madam Trailblazer."
"You're doing fine, Taran." Ranari gives you a reassuring smile. "I'm not expecting you to get everything perfect the first time."
He decides not to mention that they tried three times and he still hadn't gotten it right.
Instead he just follows her to the next test, hoping he didn't fail this one
Ranari brings you to a fairly large training room. She sits on the floor and taps the floor in front of her. "Sit down. We'll talk for a moment before getting started."
Taran sits, and waits for her to speak
"Why should you kill someone?" Ranari asks you calmly.
"U-um... B-b-because th-they are the en-enemy?" He asks in response
"How do you know they are the enemy? I'm not trying to trick you. Just tell me the method you use to determine whether someone is an enemy."
"U-um, y-you t-tell us which R-Riedrans to attack, and, um, if s-someone is a-attacking me or s-someone else..."
Ranari nods. "If I told you to kill the next person to come in this room, what would you do?"
"I-I..." Taran takes a deep breath, "I-I should f-follow orders. You w-wouldn't tell me to do that without a good reason. M-maybe the t-target can't know they a-are being targeted, and th-they are psychic, so I-I can't know who you invited. Y-You... I-I can t-trust you, right?"
Ranari nods thoughtfully. "You can trust me," she promises. "Don't kill the next person to come in this room," she adds quickly. "How do you discern right from wrong?" is her next question.
"U-um, helping people is r-right, b-because th-that helps the il-Yannah, and, um, f-following orders is right... Um, st-stealing is wrong, b-being a burden is wrong, k-k-killing is wr-wrong, b-but I'm already a killer, so that doesn't matter...
Ranari holds up her hand. "Taran, it always matters that killing is wrong. Even if you've already killed."
"B-b-but I'm g-going to kill again." Taran says quietly, looking down at the space between them, "Th-this mission, th-the next, the one a-a-after that... It-it doesn't matter that k-killing is wrong, I-I'm going to keep killing people. So that g-g-good people d-don't h-have to, so, so th-they can stay g-good and l-live in the A-Age of Light."
Ranari nods. "Yes. But it's important we remember that we are doing a terrible thing, even if it is for the good of others. If we become desensitized to killing people, we run the risk of becoming just as bad as the Inspired."
"I-I know, b-but," Taran looks up at the ceiling, "Af-after you hurt for s-so long, n-no matter how bad it hurts, it j-just becomes normal... And, if I go b-bad, th-then you'll j-just kill me," he looks at Ranari, "N-not y-you, specifically, b-but The R-Road will, an-and obviously I d-don't want th-that to happen, it-it'd be a w-waste of r-resources. H-Hopefully it-it will b-be o-one of the Riedran's who k-kills me."
"Taran," Ranari says levelly. "You should not allow yourself to fall into evil on the principle that we'll kill you when you get too bad. Nobody wants that."
"Oh, no, th-that's n-not... I'm s-sorry, I'm not ex-explaining it well... I-I d-don't want to become e-evil, b-but I-I'm just..." he shrugs, "I-I'm not w-worried. I'm already a b-b-bad person, and I-I'm not very im-important or very st-strong.... b-but I-I'll be c-careful, I promise, I kn-know n-no one w-wants m-me to b-be wasteful like that."
Ranari sighs. "Taran. Look at me. You are not a bad person."
Taran looks at her, confused.
"I've k-k-killed people, k-killing people is wr-wrong, a g-g-good person doesn't k-kill people. If I'm not a g-good person, I'm a b-bad person"
He gives her a small smile, "It's, it's okay. I-I'm n-not upset about it. I-I've known for years."
Ranari shakes her head. "Taran, I've killed people," she states flatly. "So has every trailblazer, and most members of the Road, including both the guides you'll be meeting to destroy the monolith. Killing people alone doesn't make you a bad person. It's your reasons, how you feel, and how you approach killing that affects what kind of person you are."
"I-I-I," Taran looks away, "I.. I kn-know you've k-k-killed p-people, Madam Tr-Trailblazer." he says, then quickly he tries to think of a way to change the subject, "Sh-shouldn't w-we s-start t-training soon, M-Madam Trailblazer?"
"This is training," Ranari says calmly. "Before I put a practice weapon in your hand and start a bout, I want to understand exactly how you think about yourself, how you see the world, and how you make your choices."
"O-oh, umm, b-b-but d-didn't you al-already l-let me use a pr-practice weapon? Did, well, did I s-skip a step before?"
"That was during a class, when you were just an ordinary student. Now we're having a one on one session, I'm getting a full sense of of you." Ranari shrugs. "Now let's return to the subject, please."
"O-okay, w-what else do you w-want to know, ma'am?"
"We were discussing the difference between killing and being a bad person," Ranari reminds you.
"Y-Y-Yes?" Taran tries to be innocent, but he knows the result even as he tries
"As I said. I've killed people, as have many members of the Road. What makes us different from you?"
Taran thinks hard, mind r-racing, but he can't see a way out of it. He could try talking too quietly, but he knows that won't work.
He doesn't want to say it, but, she's insisting and... he starts shaking and trembling, knowing this could ruin everything.
"N-n-n-n-nothing, Trailblazer, ma'am." It's quiet, but still loud enough to hear
"You're not a bad person, Taran," Ranari repeats softly.
"O-o-okay, ma'am" He say quietly
Ranari nods. "You aren't a bad person solely because you kill. The Road kills because we need to, and only when it's necessary. We don't kill innocents, or murder just because we want to, or for our own personal gain. That is what separates us from the Inspired, and if you give yourself up for lost, it won't just be a waste, it could do a great deal of damage to the Road, to Adar, your friends. And you would be mourned. And it's very important that you remember that, Taran. You're worth more than just the resources we would lose if you died."
"O-okay, Trailblazer," Taran says, but he isn't fully convinced
Ranari gives Taran a serious look. "New assignment. Each morning, I want you to repeat this to yourself. 'I am good. I have worth.' I want you to say that to yourself at least once a day, and any time you start to feel like you're a monster, or like you're nothing."
"O-o-o-okay, Ma'am," Taran says his voice small,
"Trust me, Taran," Ranari gives you a small smile. "I've met real monsters. You aren't one."
"I-I know, Madam Tr-trailblazer."
"Okay, now say it."
"I-I am g-good. I h-have worth."
Ranari nods. "It will take some time. But I want you to keep saying that to yourself. Now. And this is very important. The order of priorities is protect Adar, then hurt the Inspired."
"W-what a-about the m-mission?"
"The mission protects Adar first and foremost. The monolith is being destroyed because it threatens Tashalatora. But if, for example, you could destroy a Riedran patrol by leading them into a trap at an Adaran civilian village? We wouldn't do that, because it would be putting Adar at too much risk."
"Th-that makes sense." Taran says nodding along
Ranari nods. "Exactly. So the order is to protect Adar first, hurt the Inspired second."
Taran hesitates, then nods, "O-okay, M-mission, pr-protect A-adar, Hurt Riedra."
"Hurt the Inspired," Ranari corrects gently. "The Dreaming Dark. We kill Riedran commoners and ordinary soldiers if we have to, but it's never the purpose of a mission. The one you were just on, for example. You killed the soldiers, but it was to keep the Inspired from finding Shalquar. The goal of the mission was to protect Adar, not hurt innocent Riedrans."
"B-but, I can't hurt the Inspired." Taran says, confused again, "Th-their too strong, w-we can hurt the country, we can hurt Riedra, b-but none of the Ins-Inspired are there w-when we do our m-missions. We-we can't hurt them."
"We can hurt them by destroying their monoliths," Ranari explains. "We can cut off their access to their soldiers, confuse their efforts to find us, save the people they try to make an example of, undermine their effect on the people. There are a thousand ways to hurt them without directly engaging them. And it's possible that someday in the future, you'll be powerful and skilled enough that we'll call on you to go directly after one of the Inspired."
"O-oh, n-no, I'll, I'll never b-be th-that good."
Ranari raises an eyebrow. "You seem quite competent already. Don't make assumptions about what more experience and practice will do for your ability."
"O-okay, Tr-Trailblazer," Taran says, backing down again
Ranari frowns. "Taran, it doesn't matter what I say if you don't believe it."
"B-but, you are r-right, aren't you?" Taran says sinking down
"Right now it doesn't matter if I'm right or wrong. I'm trying to get you to change how you view yourself. That means that until I find a way to help you actually believe you have worth, I might as well be talking in Abyssal."
"I-I'm s-sorry ma'am, I-I, I know F-F-father w-w-w-w-was w-w-w-w-w-wr.... I-I kn-know...b-bu-but..."
Ranari nods. "That's the purpose of the phrase. To slowly counteract that invasive idea that you're worth nothing."
Taran nods, silent
"Now let's go over how practice bouts will work."
"o-okay"
"With me, we won't be directly engaging much. Instead, I'll watch how you work on practice targets and such. Get you used to a constructive training environment."
"I-I d-don't follow."
"When you're training with me, or the person I choose to continue your training after this mission, mistakes will be treated as learning experiences, not crimes. It's okay to mess up, those are chances to improve, not be punished."
"O-okay, um, th-thank you?" Taran still isn't sure exactly how this is supposed to work
Ranari stands. "This is how training usually works," she explains. "As a supportive, enjoyable activity, rather than a harsh, painful one."
Taran bites his lip, and stands up.
Ranari points at a simply made humanoid target. "You can start with crossbow or sword, either one. There's practice swords right there, blunted bolts over there." She points to a few racks and boxes.
"I-I have one," Taran says unslinging his crossbow and pulling out his blunted bolt. He checks over the crossbow, tightening some screws and checking the string.
He then eyes the target and tries to measure out 120 feet away from it, to begin firing from.
"Closer please, Taran," Ranari requests. "Sixty to seventy feet away."
"We-we don't n-need to start th-that easy, " Taran says, "I-I u-usually sh-shoot from this di-distance for t-training."
Despite what he says, he does move up
"I'd just like to see you at various levels of difficulty," Ranari explains. "Shoot when ready."
"O-okay," Taran says, then he loads his bolt, raises and fires in one motion. Then he walks over to the target, picks up his bolt, and walks back to fire a second time
Ranari lets you fire five shots then calls. "Back ten feet and five more shots."
Taran backs up, and fires five more shots. Retrieving his bolt after every shot
Ranari has you repeat this until you're firing from 150 feet.
Taran does so without complaint, though he is noticing that he's moving faster than normal, covering ground quicker
Ranari calls a stop. "Okay, now let's switch to the shortsword, okay?"
"O-okay," Taran says as he puts away the crossbow and draws his shortsword, checking the edge, the feeling has been growing, an... unease.
"I-I'm s-sorry I'm not d-doing very well," He says finally, looking up, "I-I'm tr-trying to f-focus on y-your cues, b-but... i-it just doesn't feel right today. I-I can't s-seem to get it right..."
"You're doing fine, Taran," Ranari says reassuringly. "What do you think might be wrong?"
"I-I d-don't kn-know," Taran says, clearly frustrated, "I-it just... I-I'm n-not, I'm not moving right... I-I feel... w-worse than u-usual, I-I can't g-get in the flow"
Ranari comes over. "Describe what you feel you're doing incorrectly."
"I-I'm less f-focused," Taran says after a minute of thinking, "I-I'm moving s-slower, th-there's a hitch, wh-when I load the bolt, b-before I aim... It's.... n-none of it's right..."
Ranari nods. "Why don't you just run the loading for yourself for a moment. See if you can identify any powerful emotions or reasons for the hitch."
"O-Okay," he says, and pulls back out the crossbow.
He pulls out the bolt, winds up the arms, locks it, places the bolt. He pulls the bolt out and fires dry, resetting the crossbow.
He does it again, feeling the hitch.
Again. Bolt, wind, lock, hitch, place
Bolt, wind, lock, hitch, place
Bolt, wind, lock, hitch, place
He's moving faster, frustration and anger growing, it wasn't right, lock, hitch, lock, hitch. The flash of color. The spinning nut.
Tears stream down his face, sobs shaking him, he places the bolt, winds it up, the line locks in place, the nut spinning to show a tiny painted sun for a brief moment of light.
Ranari looks at you. "Did you figure out what's wrong?"
Taran nods, his voice thick, "Wh-when sh-she b-bought it, sh-she thought I'd be a-alone, in the m-mountains. H-hunting g-goats or b-bobcats. Sh-she always w-wants to... to m-make p-people f-feel better... so, sh-she f-figured out h-how to t-take it apart, and sh-she painted a l-little sun on the nut th-that locks the string... t-to m-make m-my d-day a l-little b-brighter..."
Taran feels his knees hit the ground, clutching his crossbow and sobbing.
Ranari nods, kneeling next to Taran quietly. "She sounds like a wonderful person."
He nods, trying to wipe away the tears and pull himself back together
"Do you want to talk about her?"
"Sh-she is m-my first friend, m-my best friend..." Taran says, "Sh-she's the b-best person in the world... a-and... I, I need to k-keep lying to her..."
"About what?"
"A-about m-me... a-about h-how I g-got my scars and why I -I dis-disappeared and m-missed lessons. O-only n-now it's worse... b-because, i-it wasn't j-just s-stuff th-that c-could b-be m-misunderstood... i-i-it was......."
"Perhaps some day you'll feel comfortable enough to share with her."
"N-no!" Taran exclaims, "n-no... sh-she al-already w-worries a-about the wh-whole world... I-I d-don't... I don't de-, I don't w-want h-her worrying more a-about me."
"Well, I'm not going to push anything," Ranari promises.
"O-okay..." Taran say
Ranari nods. "I think that's enough for today. We'll try shortsword tomorrow."
"I-I, okay... I'm... I'm sorry, a-again, for all this, Madam Trailblazer"
"You didn't do anything wrong, Taran."
"I-... R-right, o-okay M-madam Trailblazer..."
"I'll see you tomorrow."
"O-okay"
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Taran's Tashalatoran Trip:
On the day before the mission, Taran wakes up more nervous than usual. He get's dressed in his armor and the clothes Esteemed Vishal provided, and sits in the middle of the dark room, to say the mantra.
"I a-am g-good. I h-have w-worth."
He gathers up his supplies, the new alchemical items he has made, the reagents he had dried and stored. Then he heads to the portal, and steps out into Tashalatora. Home, for the most part.
You step out of the Tashalatora portal into the large cave it exits from.
Taran heads out of the cave, looking to go to the Temple proper, to ask after Sim and where she is going this morning. He keeps a sharp eye out for her distinctive purple robes though, not bothering to look for faces in case she was wearing a different one today.
When you get to the main temple, you find it's full of people bustling back and forth, from healers to warriors to priests.
Taran would approach one of the healers.
"U-Um, e-excuse m-me, s-sir, I-I'm t-trying to f-find Sim, um, w-would y-you know wh-where she i-is th-this morning? O-or wh-who w-would know? I-It isn't im-important but... I-I was hoping to m-meet with h-her today."
The healer nods. "Sim's down that hall, in the first door on the left." He points.
"Th-thank you sir." Taran gives a quick bow and heads off down the hall.
He stopped in front of the door, trembling a bit with nerves before he quietly opens the door
Sim is mixing a poultice, tongue sticking out between her teeth as she crushes herbs and combines them.
Taran takes a deep breath, mumbles the mantra under his breath, and then quietly closes the door behind him.
"U-um, d-do you w-want s-some help?"
Sim turns as you come in. "Taran! Hi!" She jumps up and comes to give you a hug.
Taran awkwardly returns the hug.
"H-hi, um, I, well, I w-was... w-we have a m-mission n-nearby, t-tomorrow, and so, I, um, I th-thought I sh-should st-stop by."
"I'm so glad you did!" Sim grins. "Come on, you can help me add the redroot."
"O-okay, um, a-after, I-I g-got you s-something... you kn-know, s-since I've been away s-so long"
"Really?" Sim hands you a vial full of powdered leaf. "Two hard shakes."
Taran shakes the vial hard, twice.
"Y-yeah, um, I-I d-didn't h-have the m-money to b-buy s-something, but I found it, and I-I thought it w-would be u-useful."
"Okay, I'm listening." Sim grins as she mixes the herbs together.
Taran grabs the bowl of berries and starts juicing them.
"U-um, I w-want to show you, n-not just tell you Sim, b-but I don't want to t-take you away f-from your work."
Sim shakes her head. "You can show me! I'm almost done with the poultice."
"O-Okay," Taran says with a small smile, passing her the bowl of juice.
Then he wipes off his fingers and pulls out the jar of 80 Ephedra leaves, gently setting it on the table.
"I, um, well, I found a f-few patches... Over near Shalquar..."
Sim mixes the berry juice in, then gasps with delight. "Ephedra!"
"Yeah, I-I kn-know you make h-healing potions, and, um, I-I thought... well, l-like I s-said, I thought it would be useful
"It's amazing!" Sim gives you another hug. "Thank you so much, Taran!"
Taran hugs her back, smiling a little.
"N-no p-problem, I-I, y-yeah... um," he steps back from her, turning back to the table to begin putting things away, "S-so, um, I-I have un-until t-tomorrow. I,um, if it-it's okay, I th-thought, maybe, I-I c-could h-help you o-out today. J-just... you know..."
Sim nods. "Totally! We can always use help!"
"Gr-great, wh-where to f-first?"
"Okay, so I have to drop this off with Kiaara first, then I'm going to do some rounds in the wards, and then I have no idea!" Sim grins.
Taran chuckles a little, "W-well, l-let's g-get this to K-kiaara first then."
"Let's go!" Sim pulls you out the door, carrying the finished poultice in her other hand.
Taran allows himself to be dragged, trying hard to just be in the moment, with the girl he liked.
Sim chatters the whole way through the halls until you arrive at a door, which she opens, revealing a storeroom manned by a kalashtar with dark skin and hair. "Kiaara I have the poultice!" She puts it on the counter with a grin. "And this is Taran, he's my friend I told you about who got in the Road!"
"A-a pl-pleasure to meet you, Esteemed K-Kiaara." Taran says with a small bow.
"I don't have any title!" Kiaara laughs. "I'm just Kiaara. Nice to meet you too, Taran."
Taran will stand there awkwardly, not really knowing what to do or say.
Sim grins. "Anyway, here's the poultice! See you later Kiaara! Come on Taran!" She tugs you towards the door.
"H-Have a good day, Es-esteemed K-kiaara." Taran says as he gets dragged out of the room to follow Sim to the Wards.
Sim pokes you a bit. "Taran, you don't need to call all kalashtar “Esteemed," she laughs. "Anyway, I'm in the broken bones ward today, let's go!"
"R-right, I-I know, Es- I mean, V-Vishal s-said as m-much, but, it's..." a shadow flickers across Taran's face, "it's h-hard to st-stop doing s-something, after you've d-done it for so long."
He tries to shake the melancholy away, "S-So, br-broken b-bones ward, a-are we j-just ch-checking in, o-or are th-there cast changes t-today?"
"Probably a few cast changes." Sim shrugs. "There are about a dozen there, I think one person's due to get out!"
"Th-that's good," Taran says, "I-I'm always g-glad wh-when someone recovers."
"It's great!" You two reach the ward entrance. "Okay, let's do this!"
"O-okay, I'll, um, I'll f-follow your lead, Sim, s-since I d-don't know the patients."
Sim and Taran make their way through the ward, changing casts, checking on bones, and taking the cast off one. After they finish, Sim grins at Taran. "Okay, your turn to pick something, I'm done with my stuff here!"
Taran freezes for a second before bashfully looking away.
"I-I j-just w-want t-to s-spend th-the d-day with m-m-m-my b-b-best f-friend," he stutters and stumbles out, "I-I-I, u-um, w-well, w-what d-do you w-want to do?"
Sim grins. "We could go by the temple, or you could tell whatever you're allowed to about your missions, or we could go exploring!"
"U-um, I-I c-can o-only t-tell you ab-about the f-first mission, really," Taran says, a small white lie, but he doesn't want to tell her about the potential danger. Or the killing.
"B-but, th-the t-temple or e-exploring, b-both sound g-good i-if I-I'm d-doing it with you," Taran freezes again, "U-Um, th-the wh-whole p-p-point is sp-spending t-time with you, so um, I, well, I don't c-care what we do..."
"Okay, we can explore while you talk!" Sim says cheerfully.
"O-okay, um, well, our f-first mission was to e-escort s-some refugees." Taran says as we walk, "Um, w-we met them out-outside of Hillcorn. Th-there was a young couple, t-two s-soldiers, one wh-who was a shifter, and, um, a young g-girl and I-I think h-her Father. She-she was the one who gave me th-this," Taran says indicating the grass braid
"That's adorable!" Sim grins and pulls you towards the exit tunnel. "They're all doing okay?"
"I-I th-think so," Taran says, following, "Um, V-Vishal sp-spent a d-day with the Shifter, I think, b-but that was a f-few weeks ago. I-I d-didn't r-really k-keep tr-track. I, well, I sp-spent a lot of my fr-free time wor-working the medical wards in Sh-Shalquar."
"That's great!" Sim ducks out of the tunnel in the mountainside. "So tell me about your teammates."
"U-um, w-well, th-there's Est- I mean, V-Vishal. He's... really kind. He's a d-dancer, and a l-leather worker, and he knows m-magic. Um, he l-likes my butt?" Taran says struggling to think of more details he can share.
"U-um, Mr. Dr-Druhdaar is on th-the t-team, that sur-surprised me. Th-then there is Mister Caelius, he c-can't hear or t-talk b-but he kn-knows a lot of m-magic, and he-he's al-always c-calm. Mister J-Juhaan is a ch-changeling, b-but I-I d-don't th-think he wants e-everyone to kn-know that. He, um, he gave me a beret," Taran says pointing to the bag, where he still has it stored.
"U-um, then there is Miss River, sh-she's a Kenku, an-and she's got r-really poweful m-magic, and a s-sword, th-though I've never seen her use it. I, um, I th-think she's n-nervous ab-about being p-part of the t-team..."
Sim giggles. "He likes your butt? And they all sound really nice! Have you just had the one mission?"
"Th-they are n-nice, um, we-we had a-another mission, b-but I sh-shouldn't talk about it." Taran points up one of the paths they are passing, "Th-there's a sp-spring up th-that way, if you w-want to go look?"
Sim nods. "Okay, let's go!" She grins. "You're already getting super secret missions, that's awesome!"
"Y-yeah," Taran says following her, "It-it's been a lot, an-and, t-tomorrows m-mission w-will be e-even b-bigger... b-but, wh-what about you? H-have y-you been d-doing ok?"
"I've been doing great!" Sim grins. "Lots of helping people and stuff. There's been a little more preparation for fighting lately, but there hasn't really been much change since you left."
"Pr-preparations? D-did s-someone s-say wh-why?" Taran trembles a bit, worrying, "I-I kn-know you d-don't l-like th-the fighting..."
Sim shakes her head. "Nope, no explanation, but you know Tashalatora goes through phases!" She laughs. "And nobody's asked me to do anything relating to violence." She makes a face. "So it hasn't really affected me, other than more blunt force wounds coming in from training sessions."
"G-good," Taran says showing her the hidden path to the spring, "N-not g-good th-that people are g-getting h-hurt, obviously, but, um, I-I d-don't w-want... It-it h-helps, kn-knowing y-you're safe..."
Sim grins. "I'm totally safe! This is an awesome path, so secrety."
"Y-yeah, I-I f-found it f-from a r-ridge, wh-while I w-was gathering some h-herbs, fr-from above y-you can tell a-a path is s-somewhere ar-around here, b-but it st-still took an hour to f-find the r-right spot. "
Taran steps out into the small little grove, with a crystal clear spring bubbling up in the center, surrounded by small bushes and hardy grasses.
"I-it's a n-nice litte s-spot."
"It's so beautiful!" Sim grins at Taran. "I love it."
Taran turns, trying to hide the blush spreading across his face, "I-I'm glad."
Sim sits down by the pool, taking her shoes off and sticking her feet in. "It's so clear."
"Y-yeah," Taran walks around the spring, pointing to a small crack in the basin, "Th-the water comes from there, p-pushed up th-through l-literal t-tons of rock and c-crystal, s-so an-anything that w-would b-be in the water gets c-caught below."
"That's incredible!" Sim grins at you.
Taran nods in agreement, sitting on the other end of the spring and watching Sim
Sim kicks her feet in the water, smiling as no silt is stirred up. "This is great. I hope I'm able to find it again while you're off on your mission."
"I-I c-can m-make a small mark, w-with some chalk, b-by the en-entrance, so you can." Taran says quickly.
"That would be amazing, thanks Taran." Sim beams at Taran.
"It-it's, n-nothing," Taran deflects, "I-it, it's j-just a little b-bit, g-give you somewhere to g-go, y-you know, i-in c-case y-you need a b-break.."
Sim giggles. "I'm touched you thought of it."
Taran hangs his head, trying to hide his blush again,
"I-it's n-nothing, Sim..."
"It's great!" Sim kicks a little water at you. "Seriously Taran, thank you."
"Y-your welcome," Taran s-said with a small grin, wiping the water off his face
Sim grins and lays back, feet still in the pool. "When'd you find this place?"
"Two, three m-months ago. Wh-while I w-was g-going th-through the R-road stuff..." Taran says putting a finger in the water, "I-I th-think it w-was after I f-found that b-big patch of Seregon."
"I remember that!" Sim grins. "Well I'm glad you found it."
"Me to." He says, enjoying the sunlight on the water, and Sims happiness.
"It's o-one of my t-t-top three spots."
"What are the other two?"
"O-one's r-really far away, we c-couldn't g-get there in a day, b-but th-there a path th-that leads to a cliff. And if you l-look out over the cliff, you c-can see the Jungle an-and the Falls. I-I w-was there d-during a sunset once, and the en-entire waterfall looked like it was on fire."
"Th-the other, It w-was a c-cave w-with beautiful cr-crystals, l-like a garden of light." tears prick Taran's eyes, "Th-that w-was the o-one, th-that th-the entrance c-collapsed." he lies, "S-so, I-I can't g-go there anymore."
He won't tell her that those spots are 2, 3 and 4 (reverse order) and that his favorite spot of all is where ever she is.
Sim grins. "They sound amazing. Maybe sometime when you have more time, you can show me the waterfall!"
"M-maybe, i-it is a l-long hike though, an-and we'd have to c-camp along the way, s-so we'd n-need to buy y-you a tent..." Taran trails off, "B-but, it, it would be nice to show you."
"I can get a tent while you're gone!" Sim says cheerfully. "And I can camp!"
"I-I kn-know, I-I just w-wanted t-to, um, well, it- I-I w-wanted to m-make sure you understood."
He couldn't tell her that it was the idea of being alone with her for a full day that had him so flustered, it'd sound weird.
Sim giggles. "Don't worry, I'll be fine camping."
"I-I know," Taran says, "Y-your g-good at everything, well, e-everything y-you wa-want to be g-good at..."
Sim laughs, blushing a bit. "I'm not good at everything! I just...practice a lot!"
"Y-you sp-spent more t-time pra-practicing pranks th-than th-the work M-Master Lukaan g-gave us, an-and you were s-still one of th-the b-best healer's in our wh-whole class." Taran points out, grinning a bit at the memories
Sim giggles. "Pranks are an important part of life!"
"I-I kn-know, y-you l-love making p-people happy," Taran says, "It-it's one of the things I l-l...like a-about you."
Sim beams. "I hope I'm making you happy right now. You're certainly making me happy."
Taran gapes for a second, struggling for words,
"Y-yeah, th-this... this is g-good," He finally says, burying in face in his knees, "I-I h-haven't... th-these p-past t-two weeks have... " He can't tell her, he can't burden her, he doesn't deserve that, he'll say the mantra later, "I-I'm g-glad we c-could sp-spend t-time t-together."
"Me too!" Sim laughs from her spot on her back, eyes tracing the clouds. "We should do it more often."
"Y-yeah, if-if I c-can, I-I'll try to st-stop by, wh-when I've g-got a l-little time. M-maybe, if... if I g-get a b-big break and y-you c-can l-leave th-the temple for a b-bit, I'll, I'll take you to the Falls."
"That would be amazing." Sim grins.
"Th-that's the p-plan then." Taran says, "Y-you g-get a tent, and the ne-next time I h-have a f-few d-days or a w-week, I'll c-come b-by, a-and we-we'll go to the Falls."
"That sounds perfect." Sim grins at you.
"Y-yeah," Taran says, th-then he stands up, "D-do y-you need to g-get b-back or do y-you have t-time for s-something cool?"
Sim bounces to her feet. "I totally have time for something cool!"
Taran chuckles, "O-okay, l-let's s-see if I r-remember where it is." He grabs a flask of the spring water, and then leads Sim out of the little clearing, marking the entrance with a tiny blue star, so she can find it again.
Sim follows you, grinning.
It doesn't take Taran long to find what he was looking for, though it is still another twenty minutes away from the spring.
It's a rock, sitting alone on one of the paths.
"I-I f-found it by accident," he says, pulling out two vials, he rubs the first oil onto the rock as he talks, "I w-w-was p-practicing u-up there," he points to the outcropping above them, "and I-I dr-dropped some of the vials I was working with."
"Uh huh." Sim nods.
Taran uses the spring water, to wash off the oil, and the rock takes on a slightly green tinge.
"W-well, I-I didn't w-want to l-leave st-stuff on the r-rock, c-cause I-I didn't kn-know what the mixture did, and you kn-know we sh-shouldn't leave mixtures to-to just react."
Sim grins. "It turns green!"
Taran grins, "Th-that's j-just w-what it l-looks like clean," He says, popping open the second vial, "Th-this, this is the cool part."
He pours a little of the second substance on his hand, and rubs it into the stone, where his hand passes, there is a faint light, resolving into a spider's web of green electricity, dancing beneath the surface of the stone.
"It-It's L-lamannian Flint, a-a whole b-bunch of it, and, if you add s-some ex-extract, y-you c-can pull th-the electrical e-energy to the s-surface."
The electricity will dance, just under the surface of the stone, for a minute or so
Sim laughs delightedly. "That's incredible!"
"I-I kn-know," Taran says, watching Sim's face light up,
"Lammania flint-as in flint from a Lammania manifest zone?"
"U-Usually," Taran says, "I-I don't kn-know if th-this one was ex-exposed th-that way, or if-if it was j-just exposed to a-a lot of l-lightning magic. B-but when I l-looked it up, th-that was the n-name the b-book gave. "
"Well that is awesome." Sim grins.
"I-I th-thought you might l-like it." Taran said, his expression a mix of melancholy and happiness
Sim nods. "I do!" She examines the rock and its electricity.
Ranari had suggested he try and exchange bad memories for good, to change associations. He tried that now, tried making this the memory of green that he thought of first. Of Sim's smile and excitement. Instead of the crack of bones and the shadows on the cave walls.
He wasn't sure it was working, but he'd made Sim happy, and there was nothing else that really mattered in the end
Sim giggles as she finishes examining the rock. "We should head back."
"Y-yeah," Taran said, checking out the sky, "We-we should."
Sim nods. "Lead the way, oh explorer," she says with a grin.
Taran chuckles slightly, then offers her a small bow before leading the way back to the monastery proper.
He wanted to ask about dinner, but she would probably eat in the cafeteria, with her friends and the people she worked with. He shouldn't intrude. This... this had been enough, right?
Sim grins. "Thanks Taran! When are you leaving?"
"U-um, th-the mission is t-tomorrow. We're s-supposed to m-meet other members of the R-road then."
"So you're leaving tomorrow," Sim checks.
"Y-yeah." He responds
"Then you can get dinner with me in the eating hall!"
Taran brightens, but then equivocates, "A-Are y-you s-sure, I-I sh-shouldn't in-intrude, y-you pr-probbly h-have plans t-to m-meet with p-people,"
"Taran, I haven't seen you in weeks! Come get dinner with me!"
"O-okay, s-sorry," Taran says giving in, "I-I j-just d-don't want to b-be a bother."
"You won't be a bother, you're my friend!"
"I-I know, I'm s-sorry." He gives a small bow, gesturing along the road, "L-ladies first, and all th-that."
Sim grins and grabs your hand, tugging you towards the eating hall.
Taran allows her to drag him along
Sim pulls you into the eating hall, which is fairly full of people, and heads for the food at the back.
Taran follows, automatically scanning the room.
Sim piles her plate with fruit, slow-roasted mushrooms, and flatbread, adding a slice of chocolate cake to the side.
Taran will grab some of the root vegetables and mushrooms, some nuts for protein that he knew he'd need. Trying to take only things there were plenty of. He wouldn't grab any desert
Sim sits at a table with the food and starts eating cheerfully.
Taran sits across from her and eats mechanically, not really caring about the taste and more just getting enough fuel for the day ahead
Sim mumbles through a mouthful of food, "Have you been to any other monasteries?"
"M-mostly Sh-Shalquar," Taran says after he finishes chewing, "Th-though I s-spent a little t-time at Malshashar. I-I st-still like it h-here b-best."
Sim grins. "We're the best!"
Taran grins shyly and nods, "Y-yeah."
Sim finishes her food. "So what's the coolest thing you've seen so far that you're allowed to tell me about?"
"U-um," Taran thinks, "I-I d-don't r-really know. I-I can't think of an-anything really. It's all b-been k-kind of n-normal really. I m-met some of the Trailblazers... Tr-trailblazer Ranari has b-been tr-training me a little."
"You're being trained by a trailblazer! That's awesome!"
"J-just, sh-she's h-helping... w-with some s-stuff." Taran says, "It-its... its b-been d-different...'
"It's still awesome." Sim grins. "I've never even met a trailblazer."
"Y-yeah, it's..." Taran takes a bite and chews, "I-It's r-really intimidating, t-to be honest."
"I'm sure you'll get used to it." Sim grins.
"Pr-probably not," Taran says, "B-but, I-I'm t-trying."
"Well, you're going to have to tell me all about it when you see me next!" Sim grins and stands up, picking up her empty plate.
"Th-there isn't much to t-talk about." Taran says picking up his own plate, "W-we t-talk, sh-she h-has m-me go th-through some k-katas, it's-it's m-more about c-centering an-and, w-working th-through some st-stuff."
"You'll still have to tell me about it." Sim grins at you as she drops her plate off by the washing area.
"O-Okay, I-I will." Taran said, making sure to wipe as much as he could off his plate before setting it in the area, if someone was in the wash area, he'd thank them for cleaning the dishes
Sim grins and heads out of the eating hall. "Okay, I guess I should head to bed now."
"O-okay," Taran says, "N-night Sim... H-have b-bright dreams."
"Have bright dreams, Taran." She waves and skips off.
"Y-yeah." Taran says.
He leaves the cafeteria, and after a moment, he turns and walks back outside the walls. Heading to the cabin, their house.
Taran climbs up the path, stopping in front of the wooden cabin that he had lived in, with Father. It was dark, cold, but the few weeks he'd been away hadn't been enough to cause any damage to the structure.
It was his home, where he grew up. Where he waited for Father to come home, and tell him where to go to find dinner.
Taran walked up to the door, then back to the path.
He knew dust and rodents had infested the cabin, they always moved in within a few days of them being out. He wanted to go in, to clean, to make sure everything was perfect for Father's return. Otherwise, Father might have thought he was slacking off, not keeping up with his work and training.
Father was never coming home.
As night fell, and the chill settled in, Taran curled up on the path, in view of the cabin, pulling his blanket around him. Unable to enter, unable to leave.
He dreamed of Father, angry, disappointed, and preparing to punish him for a day wasted in frivolous pursuits.
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Vishan and Dulamul Part 1:
Vishal's trip is quiet and uneventful. When he get to the village, he find there are indeed a larger than usual number of shifters. In addition, there don't seem to be many kalashtar, and he get a few curious looks as you move through town. Spotting a couple places (Perception: 15) that Dulamul could be Vishal decides to go to the Path of Light temple knowing Dulamul is interested in it. The interior of the temple is quiet, veins of crystal running through the walls in such a way as to diffract the light through the room. Several people, both shifters and humans, are seated on benches or at tables, some speaking softly while others merely meditate in silence. One table has a kalashtar (the first you've seen in the village) leading a small discussion with three humans and two shifters, one of which is Dulamul. A smile cannot help but come across Vishal's face as he sees the shfiter. But not wanting to interrupt the discussion Vishal attempts to slip quietly into the background and just observe. He sees that Dulamul seems to be enjoying himself, his shoulders are relaxed, and occasionally you can see him give a brief laugh.Vishal has a small smile as he sees this and will just continue to observer until its either over or someone interrupts him. (Stealth: 13, Perception: 9, Insight: 15)
After about half an hour, they all rise from the table, standing to go. Vishal stands up as well and waits for Dulamul to notice him. Dulamul notices you about halfway to the door and stops, surprise on his face. Vishal, a giant smile on his face, walks towards him now that he's finally noticed. Not sure exactly what the proper way to say hello is after their last encounter he settles with a simple, "Hey. Fancy seeing you here." "I thought you were on mission?" Dulamul raises an eyebrow. Vishal shrugs and says, "It was a short one. And I said I'd visit you after my next mission. I honestly didn't expect it to be so soon either." "Well, hello there," Dulamul laughs. Vishal laughs back before saying, "I don't know if you had any plans for after your meeting. But I'd love to get food and talk." Dulamul shakes his head. "I didn't have any plans." “Alright. How about we grab a bite then?” Vishal stomach then growls as he embarrassingly admits, “I may have skipped breakfast to be here quicker.” Dulamul snorts. "Come on." Vishal grins and attempts to grab Dulamul’s hand as he lets him lead him to where they need to go.
Dulamul smiles and takes it. He leads you to one of the taverns, where he waves at the bartender and grabs a table. Vishal has a really genuine bright smile on his face as he says, “You’re adjusting really well it seem.” Dulamul nods. "It's...nice. Peaceful." “That’s good.” Vishal replies with a smile before adding, “It looks like you’re already making friends. Which is good. And quick, you’ve only been here.....a day maybe two?” Dulamul shrugs. "Everyone here's very friendly." “That good to hear. Are they helping you get everything you need. A place to live. A way to get food and water. Money.” Vishal looks embarrassed as he says, “I honestly don’t know much about what happens once we get you to safety.” Dulamul smiles. "The Road gave me some funds to get started while I...figure stuff out." Vishal nods as he says, “That’s good. I guess you have a lot of thinking to do still.” Dulamul nods. "Yeah...like I said, still figuring stuff out." Vishal replies, “Ranari told me that you’re interested in learning to read and the Path of Light still.” Dulamul shrugs. "They both seem...interesting."
“And what about drawing? Given anymore thought to that.” Dulamul shrugs again. "I'm not sure. It was just something I was trying out...it's only been a couple days since you've seen me after all," he says with a faint smile. “Right sorry.” Vishal says with a nervous laugh, “I guess I’m forgetting that. Being on missions kind of....makes you feel like you’re missing out on a lot.” "I'm pretty sure that's not specific to a mission," Dulamul says with a smile. "I think that happens anytime someone goes on a trip." “Yeah you’re right.” Vishal replies before adding, “I’m just always gone. And even when I’m not I’m expected to prepare for the next mission.” Dulamul shrugs. "I wouldn't expect anything else." “Yeah. But it doesn’t help with the feeling like you missed a lot stuff.” Dulamul smiles. "Understandable."
Vishal smiles and then ask, “How’s the food here?” "Not bad. A lot more flavor than what I'm used to." Dulamul replies. “Do you like it? I mean....if you don’t you can probably ask for less spice.” Dulamul shakes his head. "It's good, just...different." “Okay.” Vishal replies with a smile, “I just wanted to make sure you knew it was okay to not like something and ask for it to be changed.” Dulamul nods. "I've had the acceptance of dissatisfaction emphasized quite a bit over the last few days," he laughs. Vishal looks legitimately confused, “What?” "It's okay to say you don't like something," Dulamul smiles. “Oh.” Vishal says now that he gets it. He then chuckles a bit now that he gets it.
Dulamul smiles and waves a server over. "Platter of roasted mushroom and some flatbread for me." “Can I have some meat skewers and flatbread please.” Vishal orders. The server nods and heads back to the bar. As the waiter leaves Vishal says, “I broght you a gift Dulamul.” Dulamul raises an eyebrow. "Yeah?" "Yeah. It's nothing too special but....I remember talking about it." Vishal replies as he goes into his pack and pulls out the wrapped package. Dulamul cocks his head curiously. "Go ahead. Open it." Vishal says excitedly. Dulamul opens it carefully, smiling a little as he sees the shirt inside. "A shirt, huh? Making a statement about my fashion sense?" he teases. Vishal smiles before saying, "Hey. I picked out your outfit. And I think I have great fashion sense." Dulamul smiles. "There's a shock." Vishal smiles and laughs before saying, "If you didn't like it you wouldn't be wearing them still." Dulamul rolls his eyes. "I have a limited number of outfits right now, you know." Vishal shrugs as he says, "Still wearing what I picked out. And as long as I'm around I'll keep giving you clothes. That way I know you're looking extra good."
Dulamul laughs. "Well, thank you then." Vishal smiles and says, "You're welcomed. And I hope you like it." "I do, it's wonderful." Vishal smiles even brighter as he says, "Great." He then looks around a little bit and says, "I've never actually been to this village. I know there limestone cave is nearby but I've actually never visited it." Dulamul nods. "From what I've heard, it's a beautiful place. Underground river, slots of stone letting in light, that kind of thing. This place is nice. Quiet, like I said. And peaceful." "That sounds amazing. Have you been yet?" Vishal asks curiously. Dulamul shakes his head. "Do you want to go after this meal?" Dulamul shakes his head. "I was planning on going in a few days, some of the other shifters said they'd take me. I want to show you a spot I found yesterday." "Okay." Vishal replies excited that Dulamul is going to show hime something. "The next time I visit you can show me the cave." "Sounds good." Dulamul nods.
Smiling Vishal decides to say, "So....I don't think Druhdaar has figured out it was us that did that prank yet. He actually wasn't on our last mission." Dulamul raises an eyebrow. "Why?" "He got assigned to a different one." Vishal replies with a shrug, "Sounded like a personal mission. But he'll be on our next one." Dulamul nods. "Makes sense." "Right." Vishal says with a nod before saying, "I'll see if I can tease him a little bit about it once I see him again." Dulamul laughs. "Let me know how it goes...if you survive." Vishal smiles and laughs as he says, "I think I can take him. I'm stronger than I look." Dulamul smirks. "He seems like he'd...overreact to that kind of thing." Vishal chuckles as he says, "Maybe but it'll be fine. I'm just hopping it'll help him open up some." "Well I wish you luck with that." Dulamul should as the server give over your orders and two mugs of water. “Thank you.” Vishal says to Dulamul and the server before he takes a bite of his skewer.
It's well spiced and excellently cooked. Dulamul piles some mushrooms on flatbread and takes a bite. Vishal hides his mouth as he says, “This is so good.” And unable to help himself starts to very quickly dig into it. Stopping at one point to quickly gulp some water down as he didn’t chew a piece all the way in his hunger. Dulamul smiles as you eat. Finishing his food in under 10 minutes Vishal has a giant content smile on his face as he says, “That really hit the spot. And I guess I was hungry than I thought.” "Well you skipped breakfast," Dulamul points out with a smile. “Right. I didn’t think it’d effect me that much.” Dulamul raises an eyebrow. "Well now you know." Vishal laughs before saying, “Well....skipping breakfast was worth it.” "Yeah?" “Yeah completely.” Vishal blushes a little as he says, “I wouldn’t eat at all if it meant seeing you just a little bit sooner.” Dulamul laughs. "I wouldn't want that. A little delay is okay if it means you stay healthy."
Vishal softly smiles as he says, “Yeah, okay. I just don’t have as much time as I’d want with you so...I’m trying to maximize it.” Dulamul shrugs. "How long will you be in Whitemouth?" Vishal let’s out a sigh as he says, “I probably shouldn’t stay more than the day. Our next mission is in two weeks. It’s a really big and well.....dangerous one. We have a lot to prepare. I need to make some armor which is going to take at least a week plus however long the psionsmith takes to put the enchantment on the armor.” Dulamul nods. "Good luck," he says seriously. “Thank you.” Vishal replies sincerely as he adds, “This is the first one where....well where I think we really need it and....this is more dangerous than the others.” Dulamul nods. "Is there anything you can tell me-anything I can help with?" Vishal looks at him and says, “I’m heading across the border. I can’t say anymore than that. And.....knowing you’re here, you’re safe, and thinking about me. Well....that’s more than enough to motivate me to make it back.”
Dulamul smiles. "Well, I'll just have to make today particularly memorable, if you've only got the one." Outwardly Vishal has a smile on his face as he says, “Thank you. That’ll help more than you know.” While on the inside he’s mentally telling himself to not get his hopes up about anything. "Great!" Dulamul swallows the last of his food. "Ready to go?" Vishal smiles and says, “I’m ready let’s go.” Dulamul nods and rises, leaving an assortment of coins on the table. "Come on." Vishal smiles and quickly follows Dulamul, excited to see what the shifter has to show him.
The two weeks pass relatively uneventfully for most of you, as you spend it preparing, training, visiting, and other such things. Two weeks after the briefing, you find yourselves arriving at the rendezvous point, having been rejoined by Druhdaar shortly before arriving. As you arrive at the spot, a small valley between two hills, the word "Birth," rings out from the walls.
After giving the countersign, you see two figures drop down from a well-concealed blind in the hill walls.
One is a young kalashtar woman with silver hair and eyes, a recently stitched cut on her cheek appearing to be healing. She gives you all an even look, then a brief bow. "Sirkashtai."
The other is a young man wearing glasses with his dark hair back in a messy ponytail. Pale, diamond shaped tattoos cover his arms, and he gives you all a grin, sticking his hand out. "6947, but everyone just calls me Diamond. So you're the guides we'll be working with, huh?"
Stella Diamant, Human Rogue 17 (Swashbuckler), The Exploits of Misfit Company
Kat, Medtech, Cyberpunk: Red
Shi, Changeling Bard 4 (College of Spirits), Tyrant's Grasp
Dani, Human Artificer 9 (Armorer), Skulls and Starships
DM, Project Point (Teams Scimitar and Longsword)
Everything Else!
Before they hopped through the portal Vishal had gifted Taran a new set of studded leather armor and quickly told him what it does, including magic to help with stealth, pockets with lots and lots of space similar to but smaller than Juhaan’s bag, and the hidden wrist compartment for daggers.
“Looks like it. My name is Vishal, by the way.” Vishal says aloud introducing himself to the others. “I’ll let the rest of the team introduce themselves.”
Ever since he returned within the group, the others can't help to notice something drastic has happened with Druhdaar's appearance: the once-hirsute, discheveled wild man is now, if not exactly well-groomed, at least a lot cleaner and more soberly dressed. The first thing that strikes the group is the druid's new hairdo, as both sides of his pate have been almost completely shaved, only leaving a shade of stubble around his head and back towards the nape of his neck, in the old classic Talashatori warrior monk style. As for his rank-smelling hide armor, it's been replaced by a simply cut but clean tunic of coarse, grey-beige cloth reinforced at the shoulders, elbows and knees, with a thick wide belt of the same material overlaid with heavy cotton thread. Most surprising of all: his forehead, left cheekbone and bare left shoulder now bear the markings of the Shalquar monastery signifying his belonging to the Novice Order.
As for his general mood, it remains gruff but the big man seems a little more subdued, as if some of the old seething anger just underneath the surface was somehow better kept in check. Finally Druhdaar also seems to have lost some weight, the ruddy puffiness of his face giving way to a leaner, more settled expression.
One thing that hasn't changed: he barely utters a word to the others as he resumes his old place within the team, answering most comments and questions here with a quiet look, there with a non-committal grunt.
' Rogues Will Be Rogues ' (Circle of Fives Admission Rules, § 6 par. IV)
" Put It Down. Now. Or Be Sorry. " (D. Khar-Errendis' Reported Tips For Curing Soul Ailments And Assorted Bad Behaviours, v. LIV p.XIII)
" Tween thisThy and yonThou, shall I prove to Thee that these art what thou dost see ? " (Grimoire of The Great Pananthyr)
" This One has said enough. Now, we fight. This way please ?" (8th Grade Bronze Disciple Raulnar Drohjo, Way of the Open Palm)