Because Mendigo has committed several of what I presume are war crimes (soul-stealing, brainwashing, necromancy, etc.), and the Jerry needs to be contained before it grows to swallow all of Adohand's Kitchen.
Yep, you forgot mass murder, serial arson, destruction of property, theft, destruction of religious grounds, smuggling, forgery, blackmail, unlicensed teleportation, substance abuse (gasoline), and jaywalking (doesn’t being made of the tortured souls of people who have died in a fire count as a crime?) That’s just Mendigo’s list too! Wait until you get Jerry’s list! (Which I believe doubles after becoming a deity…)
Even Jerry himself has committed countless crimes, and the Jerry Hive is spreading out of control. Even Plopped, the guy who started the whole Jerry Hive before Mendigo took over, knows about the atrocious acts Jerry has committed! Don't you see? The Jerry need to be stopped for the safety of Adohand's Kitchen!
Jerry, did do lots of crime. like, his whole deal was "i like crime". although im not SUPER tuned into the lore of this thing... cant we have evil deities? like, there are evil gods, just say'n. also, is Jerry still alive? what state of being is he in? demi-god? dunno about me but I wouldn't drop a bunch of angry slimes on a cult that warships a VERY angry pseudo-god...
I would if I had a lot of backup. Besides, the Hive is getting out of control, and we're making sure it stays in check. Arsonistic hive-minds aren't something we're just gonna let swallow up all of Adohand's Kitchen.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Former Spider Queen of the Spider Guild, and friendly neighborhood scheming creature.
"Made by spiders, for spiders, of spiders."
My pronouns are she/her.
Web Weaver of Everlasting Narrative! (title bestowed by Drummer)
Jerry and mendigo's story of brain washing to collect souls and bring back THE original jerry.
THEN the resistance and Elendon fighting back several times until they went to the infinity plane where stargazer just WAS A BOSS.
NOW newcomers are oblivious to this history and want to ruin Jerry's chances of becoming a diety? I might be naive but I love a comeback story, and I say HECK YEAH JERRY!!
Both as a reader of ANCIENT history and a PROUD supporter of JERRY, I propose we make a deal with the spider queen in order to avoid violence and make certain we DON'T repeat the past mistakes of Jerry followers....
If jerry allows, I would like to be an ambassador of peace and opportunity.
IN DEFENSE OF MENDIGO/JERRY AGAINST ALL WAR CRIMES,
Firstly, I just want to say to everyone who was brainwashed or "forced" into the hive: You Will Recover. I know trusting someone who literally wanted to devour you and your soul is difficult - but not impossible.
When I first read through the "books" of ancient lore on the jerry (the history of this thread) I asked myself, why would someone create this CULT, or whatever you wanna call it, without a purpose right? SURELY there must be a purpose for growing an army to use? Perhaps it was greed, hunger for attention, thirst for blood? BUT IT WAS NONE OF THESE THINGS. While very accurate that this group of Jerries was concerning for people, they never said specifically WHY they were "collecting" souls. While true that Jerry (secretly Mendigo) was bending other free wills to his own, it wasn't out of HATE or for CHAOS. Never did Jerry take more than he needed. He just wanted someone back. He was so desperate, he would try ANYTHING to get jerry back.
At the start, it didn't seem to be very effective. Just creating a home (thread) called "we are jerry" clearly was not enough to gather attention, or was it? Soon, like moths to a flame, they came one by one, some resisting easily, others swayed to Jerry's side quickly. FINALLY, when push came to shove, Jerry pushed his influence against those who would destroy his followers he'd already gained.
In reality It was not Jerry who picked a fight with the resistance - it was the resistance who decided to OPPOSE all of Jerry. Jerry did what anyone would do. All of his hard work and following being quelled by the resistance, he decided to defend against the resistance by spreading his influence even further and in doing so he would end all conflict. There would be no more resistance versus jerry. There would just be jerry and peace.
DID jerry take it too far? DUH, yeah, well yup. Yes, there is no denying jerry went beyond reasonable "methods" to defend his hive, but haven't we all done this before? THINK ABOUT IT. When your little brother (or any sibling) pranks and annoys you so much, you commit war crimes to get revenge right? When you're so bored, you make SUPER dark jokes about other people's war crimes. When you are just DONE with life, and you decide nothing matters so you commit war crimes cuz they're fun. When you do these, YOU'RE just like JERRY.
After a long and strange afternoon of reading about the "infinity war" and Stargazer's assistant gods coming to fight jerry and ultimately barely defeating him, I came to respect and admire Jerry and his foolish ways. Because in the end, Mendigo made the deal with Stargazer to release his control over brainwashed people and in return got THE original Jerry back, which is all that really matters.
If after reading this, the Spider Queen still wants to kill Mendigo and Jerry, I hope Elendon hears my pleas and halts this chaos before it goes too far, before all is lost.....
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
We don't "infect" people anymore....
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
A different voice, one that's much more melodic than Stargazer's, sounds from seemingly nowhere and everywhere at the same time. "The time has come to show myself once again."
With that, a brilliant purple beam of light strikes the ground about 10 ft. from you. A figure emerges from the dust as the light dims. He's wearing unusual armor: it has symmetrical blades and ridges extending from almost everywhere, including a set of three on the helmet. Sheathed on his hips are a pair of beautifully forged curved swords, and slung over his left shoulder is an exquisitely carved blackened bow. On his back is a blood red cloak edged in gold and silver threads.
With voice that is familiar to those of the Jerry Hive, the stranger says "I thought you were supposed to release all those who were not willing member of the hive, weren't you? Wasn't that part of the deal you made with Stargazer?"
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
A different voice, one that's much more melodic than Stargazer's, sounds from seemingly nowhere and everywhere at the same time. "The time has come to show myself once again."
With that, a brilliant purple beam of light strikes the ground about 10 ft. from you. A figure emerges from the dust as the light dims. He's wearing unusual armor: it has symmetrical blades and ridges extending from almost everywhere, including a set of three on the helmet. Sheathed on his hips are a pair of beautifully forged curved swords, and slung over his left shoulder is an exquisitely carved blackened bow. On his back is a blood red cloak edged in gold and silver threads.
With voice that is familiar to those of the Jerry Hive, the stranger says "I thought you were supposed to release all those who were not willing member of the hive, weren't you? Wasn't that part of the deal you made with Stargazer?"
"Elendon, is it not? We did release them. I know not what sort of spell he might be under."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.
IN DEFENSE OF MENDIGO/JERRY AGAINST ALL WAR CRIMES,
Firstly, I just want to say to everyone who was brainwashed or "forced" into the hive: You Will Recover. I know trusting someone who literally wanted to devour you and your soul is difficult - but not impossible.
When I first read through the "books" of ancient lore on the jerry (the history of this thread) I asked myself, why would someone create this CULT, or whatever you wanna call it, without a purpose right? SURELY there must be a purpose for growing an army to use? Perhaps it was greed, hunger for attention, thirst for blood? BUT IT WAS NONE OF THESE THINGS. While very accurate that this group of Jerries was concerning for people, they never said specifically WHY they were "collecting" souls. While true that Jerry (secretly Mendigo) was bending other free wills to his own, it wasn't out of HATE or for CHAOS. Never did Jerry take more than he needed. He just wanted someone back. He was so desperate, he would try ANYTHING to get jerry back.
At the start, it didn't seem to be very effective. Just creating a home (thread) called "we are jerry" clearly was not enough to gather attention, or was it? Soon, like moths to a flame, they came one by one, some resisting easily, others swayed to Jerry's side quickly. FINALLY, when push came to shove, Jerry pushed his influence against those who would destroy his followers he'd already gained.
In reality It was not Jerry who picked a fight with the resistance - it was the resistance who decided to OPPOSE all of Jerry. Jerry did what anyone would do. All of his hard work and following being quelled by the resistance, he decided to defend against the resistance by spreading his influence even further and in doing so he would end all conflict. There would be no more resistance versus jerry. There would just be jerry and peace.
DID jerry take it too far? DUH, yeah, well yup. Yes, there is no denying jerry went beyond reasonable "methods" to defend his hive, but haven't we all done this before? THINK ABOUT IT. When your little brother (or any sibling) pranks and annoys you so much, you commit war crimes to get revenge right? When you're so bored, you make SUPER dark jokes about other people's war crimes. When you are just DONE with life, and you decide nothing matters so you commit war crimes cuz they're fun. When you do these, YOU'RE just like JERRY.
After a long and strange afternoon of reading about the "infinity war" and Stargazer's assistant gods coming to fight jerry and ultimately barely defeating him, I came to respect and admire Jerry and his foolish ways. Because in the end, Mendigo made the deal with Stargazer to release his control over brainwashed people and in return got THE original Jerry back, which is all that really matters.
If after reading this, the Spider Queen still wants to kill Mendigo and Jerry, I hope Elendon hears my pleas and halts this chaos before it goes too far, before all is lost.....
You hear a voice from above as a small drone opens up to reveal a speaker.
"We do not wish to kill Mendigo and Jerry, but we will do so if they attack us. Stargazer's deal with Mendigo was more of a slap on the wrist for the crimes the Jerry Hive and Mendigo have committed. We are simply doing what has been due for a long time: Punishing the Jerry Hive for all the atrocities they have committed. Now, the great scales shall be evened, and you shall know the cold steel of justice's blade. Release the Atlas!"
The door to the Jerry Hive is smashed into splinters as a wave of 600 soldiers comes forth. Automatons of silksteel and tarrasque bone, each of them a burly ogre-sized dreadnought of Jerry destruction, all 600 Atlas march forwards as one, ready for battle.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Former Spider Queen of the Spider Guild, and friendly neighborhood scheming creature.
"Made by spiders, for spiders, of spiders."
My pronouns are she/her.
Web Weaver of Everlasting Narrative! (title bestowed by Drummer)
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
A different voice, one that's much more melodic than Stargazer's, sounds from seemingly nowhere and everywhere at the same time. "The time has come to show myself once again."
With that, a brilliant purple beam of light strikes the ground about 10 ft. from you. A figure emerges from the dust as the light dims. He's wearing unusual armor: it has symmetrical blades and ridges extending from almost everywhere, including a set of three on the helmet. Sheathed on his hips are a pair of beautifully forged curved swords, and slung over his left shoulder is an exquisitely carved blackened bow. On his back is a blood red cloak edged in gold and silver threads.
With voice that is familiar to those of the Jerry Hive, the stranger says "I thought you were supposed to release all those who were not willing member of the hive, weren't you? Wasn't that part of the deal you made with Stargazer?"
"Elendon, is it not? We did release them. I know not what sort of spell he might be under."
"I'm glad to see you still remember me Helmut." Elendon says. "If you truly do not know why Zombles is still claiming to be part of your hive, then you would be willing to help figure it out, right? Maybe even cure him?"
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
A different voice, one that's much more melodic than Stargazer's, sounds from seemingly nowhere and everywhere at the same time. "The time has come to show myself once again."
With that, a brilliant purple beam of light strikes the ground about 10 ft. from you. A figure emerges from the dust as the light dims. He's wearing unusual armor: it has symmetrical blades and ridges extending from almost everywhere, including a set of three on the helmet. Sheathed on his hips are a pair of beautifully forged curved swords, and slung over his left shoulder is an exquisitely carved blackened bow. On his back is a blood red cloak edged in gold and silver threads.
With voice that is familiar to those of the Jerry Hive, the stranger says "I thought you were supposed to release all those who were not willing member of the hive, weren't you? Wasn't that part of the deal you made with Stargazer?"
"Elendon, is it not? We did release them. I know not what sort of spell he might be under."
"I'm glad to see you still remember me Helmut." Elendon says. "If you truly do not know why Zombles is still claiming to be part of your hive, then you would be willing to help figure it out, right? Maybe even cure him?"
"I would be willing to, yes.... What do you require of me?
"Ooh, idea! We can cure him with the cleansing balm of fire!
"Just kidding."
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.
To post a comment, please login or register a new account.
I would if I had a lot of backup. Besides, the Hive is getting out of control, and we're making sure it stays in check. Arsonistic hive-minds aren't something we're just gonna let swallow up all of Adohand's Kitchen.
Former Spider Queen of the Spider Guild, and friendly neighborhood scheming creature.
"Made by spiders, for spiders, of spiders."
My pronouns are she/her.
Web Weaver of Everlasting Narrative! (title bestowed by Drummer)
Wow this thread is.....
AWESOME!
Jerry and mendigo's story of brain washing to collect souls and bring back THE original jerry.
THEN the resistance and Elendon fighting back several times until they went to the infinity plane where stargazer just WAS A BOSS.
NOW newcomers are oblivious to this history and want to ruin Jerry's chances of becoming a diety? I might be naive but I love a comeback story, and I say HECK YEAH JERRY!!
The brief mentions of the Jerry-borg, the bob, frank, and Ben&Jerry, were usually hilarious and made the war feel chaotic.
Man, I really hope this story continues and allows Jerry and Mendigo to develope into godhood or maybe develope into madness......
Both as a reader of ANCIENT history and a PROUD supporter of JERRY, I propose we make a deal with the spider queen in order to avoid violence and make certain we DON'T repeat the past mistakes of Jerry followers....
If jerry allows, I would like to be an ambassador of peace and opportunity.
IN DEFENSE OF MENDIGO/JERRY AGAINST ALL WAR CRIMES,
Firstly, I just want to say to everyone who was brainwashed or "forced" into the hive: You Will Recover. I know trusting someone who literally wanted to devour you and your soul is difficult - but not impossible.
When I first read through the "books" of ancient lore on the jerry (the history of this thread) I asked myself, why would someone create this CULT, or whatever you wanna call it, without a purpose right? SURELY there must be a purpose for growing an army to use? Perhaps it was greed, hunger for attention, thirst for blood? BUT IT WAS NONE OF THESE THINGS. While very accurate that this group of Jerries was concerning for people, they never said specifically WHY they were "collecting" souls. While true that Jerry (secretly Mendigo) was bending other free wills to his own, it wasn't out of HATE or for CHAOS. Never did Jerry take more than he needed. He just wanted someone back. He was so desperate, he would try ANYTHING to get jerry back.
At the start, it didn't seem to be very effective. Just creating a home (thread) called "we are jerry" clearly was not enough to gather attention, or was it? Soon, like moths to a flame, they came one by one, some resisting easily, others swayed to Jerry's side quickly. FINALLY, when push came to shove, Jerry pushed his influence against those who would destroy his followers he'd already gained.
In reality It was not Jerry who picked a fight with the resistance - it was the resistance who decided to OPPOSE all of Jerry. Jerry did what anyone would do. All of his hard work and following being quelled by the resistance, he decided to defend against the resistance by spreading his influence even further and in doing so he would end all conflict. There would be no more resistance versus jerry. There would just be jerry and peace.
DID jerry take it too far? DUH, yeah, well yup. Yes, there is no denying jerry went beyond reasonable "methods" to defend his hive, but haven't we all done this before? THINK ABOUT IT. When your little brother (or any sibling) pranks and annoys you so much, you commit war crimes to get revenge right? When you're so bored, you make SUPER dark jokes about other people's war crimes. When you are just DONE with life, and you decide nothing matters so you commit war crimes cuz they're fun. When you do these, YOU'RE just like JERRY.
After a long and strange afternoon of reading about the "infinity war" and Stargazer's assistant gods coming to fight jerry and ultimately barely defeating him, I came to respect and admire Jerry and his foolish ways. Because in the end, Mendigo made the deal with Stargazer to release his control over brainwashed people and in return got THE original Jerry back, which is all that really matters.
If after reading this, the Spider Queen still wants to kill Mendigo and Jerry, I hope Elendon hears my pleas and halts this chaos before it goes too far, before all is lost.....
Fun Fact: Frank is the original Resistance.
I am also here.
Am snek.
LOL I love this thread too much now for it to die.
ZobleKlein!? your our enemies? dang it.
She/They/it
Keep in mind I'm in the UK so my time zone's GMT.
Definitely not an undead.
YES IT WAS ME ALL ALONG
I am also here.
Am snek.
Why must you side with the wretched Jerry? he can suck a potato.
She/They/it
Keep in mind I'm in the UK so my time zone's GMT.
Definitely not an undead.
No! You misunderstand! I side with the Resistance, I am it's avatar. I am in danger, My mind is no longer fully my own. Jerry, Jerry is in there. Help me.
I am also here.
Am snek.
QUICK SOLDIERS! FOLLOW THE QUEENS ORDERS QUICKLY! GET THE MATERIALS SHE ASKED FOR!
Stargazer, can help this poor infected soul? ther my friend please.
She/They/it
Keep in mind I'm in the UK so my time zone's GMT.
Definitely not an undead.
We don't "infect" people anymore....
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.
A different voice, one that's much more melodic than Stargazer's, sounds from seemingly nowhere and everywhere at the same time. "The time has come to show myself once again."
With that, a brilliant purple beam of light strikes the ground about 10 ft. from you. A figure emerges from the dust as the light dims. He's wearing unusual armor: it has symmetrical blades and ridges extending from almost everywhere, including a set of three on the helmet. Sheathed on his hips are a pair of beautifully forged curved swords, and slung over his left shoulder is an exquisitely carved blackened bow. On his back is a blood red cloak edged in gold and silver threads.
With voice that is familiar to those of the Jerry Hive, the stranger says "I thought you were supposed to release all those who were not willing member of the hive, weren't you? Wasn't that part of the deal you made with Stargazer?"
"Elendon, is it not? We did release them. I know not what sort of spell he might be under."
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.
(Also, this thing has over 500 comments. Crazy.)
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.
You hear a voice from above as a small drone opens up to reveal a speaker.
"We do not wish to kill Mendigo and Jerry, but we will do so if they attack us. Stargazer's deal with Mendigo was more of a slap on the wrist for the crimes the Jerry Hive and Mendigo have committed. We are simply doing what has been due for a long time: Punishing the Jerry Hive for all the atrocities they have committed. Now, the great scales shall be evened, and you shall know the cold steel of justice's blade. Release the Atlas!"
The door to the Jerry Hive is smashed into splinters as a wave of 600 soldiers comes forth. Automatons of silksteel and tarrasque bone, each of them a burly ogre-sized dreadnought of Jerry destruction, all 600 Atlas march forwards as one, ready for battle.
Former Spider Queen of the Spider Guild, and friendly neighborhood scheming creature.
"Made by spiders, for spiders, of spiders."
My pronouns are she/her.
Web Weaver of Everlasting Narrative! (title bestowed by Drummer)
"I'm glad to see you still remember me Helmut." Elendon says. "If you truly do not know why Zombles is still claiming to be part of your hive, then you would be willing to help figure it out, right? Maybe even cure him?"
"I would be willing to, yes.... What do you require of me?
"Ooh, idea! We can cure him with the cleansing balm of fire!
"Just kidding."
Paladin main who spends most of his D&D time worldbuilding or DMing, not Paladin-ing.