Granted. (No corruptions, just granted. You'll regret it soon enough. And you can't turn it off.)

I wish to know if man's interstellar future will be with FTL travel, wormhole-like travel, generation-ship travel, or something else.

Granted. The pure amount of information flowing through you breaks your mind.

I wish for the aaaaaaacccccccceeeeeee subreddit to still have the greatest tits and blue-footed boobies on the internet.

Granted. All other tits and blue-footed boobies are removed from the internet.

I wish for the ability to create any kind of food with a thought. 

Granted. You can now only create gourmet dishes with a thought. But some people on twitter cancel you for being racist. Or foodist. Half of twitter is just so mentally ill.

I wish the entire population of humans becomes more mature.

Granted, everyone becomes 100 years old and humanity collectively dies of old age within a year.

I wish for the destruction of all social media. 

Granted. This includes DnDBeyond.

I wish to have a book that contains the entirety of human history, accurate, and in my language.

Quote from Bluepanther512 >>

Granted. This includes DnDBeyond.

 

I wish to have a book that contains the entirety of human history, accurate, and in my language.

 Gotcha. its the size of an atom. 

I wish to have the most high quality gamer pc with no reprecussions.

Granted. As it needs to be the most high quality gaming computer, it is a supercomputer and incredibly expensive and difficult to maintain.

I wish for an invasion of Denmark.

Granted. But only after a convoluted plot involving brother murder, daughter murder, uncle murder, and seeing the ghost of one's deceased father occurs. To be or not to be, the invasion depends upon this.

I wish for brown rice to go on sale the next time I'm at the store.

Granted, at a -90% discount.

I wish for the ability to make great tea that I enjoy whenever I want.

Granted. It is three gallons of tea that appears in your stomach, bursting it.

I wish for a good D&D character.

granted. it's someone else's.

I wish to own every DnD sourcebook ever created in both the present and the future

Granted. You own them, but they are not in your possession.

I wish for money.

Granted. But mo' money, mo' problems. You're now on the run in fear for your life.

I wish for inspiration.

Granted. You are now inspired to continue existing.

I wish for Bardic Inspiration.

Granted. you are inspired to create a new twilight series and are hated by both fans and critics of the original series

I wish for the power to fly

Granted. You can fly……………………in an airplane.

I wish for one singular lemon to appear.

Granted. But when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. And guess what the IRS knows that you didn’t put that in as money earned from a small business.

I wish for a singular baguette.

Granted. It appears, uh, in a very uncomfortable place. unless you're into that, in which case it probably feels great. I wouldn't eat it though.

I wish for a singular grain of rice. 

Granted. You have a single grain of rice in the back of your eye sock.

I wish for a 100% off coupon to the bank.