this spear can only be used at daybreak. otherwise, it crumbles into a pile of ashes.

potion of jokes

When consumed the potion turns you into a joke, the laughing stock of the entier town.

The staff of the stardust dragon.

When you use it it sprinkles a cloud of glittering "stardust" in the shape of a dragon to distract your enemies and provide cover.

The Ring of Potential 

This ring only exists in potential.  It's very complicated and probably quantum. 

circlet of understanding

When you wear this circlet, you understand the reason behind you wearing it.

Rainbow Snowflake

The legendary sword Rainbow Snowflake, which requires attunement by someone whose clothes--with the exception of up to one frilled or beribboned white dress per ten--are all pink or purple. 

wand of smiles

This wand, when held, makes you smile.

By injecting a painful poison in you which forces your facial muscles to contract.

mask of comedy

Your friends laugh at you when you wear this because it is very ugly; It also turns into your own face

S.D.M.G- Space dolphin machine gun

(since you said no item)

A dolphin with a machine gun. In spaaaaace...

It's useless, because nobody is in space, and dolphins don't have fingers.

The spoon of smiting.

When you bring this spoon to your mouth to eat with it, it realy hurts. Like you where clubed in the face.

The ancient manipulator.

(Anyone realizes im geting these from the game terraria?)

It's the title of a book about a political figure two thousand years ago. No magical properties, just a book.

The Dragonheart Sword

Its just a sword that pumps out blood from the heart of a engraved dragon makeing a trail of blood behind you when you wield it.

The Ring of Rage

This ring when worn will replace your heart, give you the abillity to fly, mindless fury, and a sick new pare of red and black threads.

Pants of the panda.

Panda-print pants.

Wand of Magic Missile

It is made from a magic missle, anyone whom touches it takes 1d4 force dmg and it vanishes.

Golden fishing rod of 100 tasks.

When held the rod has a mind of its own and you perform 100 random tasks at once... which may or may not kill you.

Ring of Halfling Nimbleness

All haflings within 20ft are nimble when a non-hafling wears this ring.

Affordable Exploding greatsword of healing

Mass-produced swords that produce an explosion of positive energy when touched. The energy spiritually heals anything within 30 ft.

The cape of vanishing