Okay fair, deryk was napping so he doesn't know either

i am commiting thread necromancy 

A devil walks in. “I heard one o’ my friend’s kids works here. I’d like unicorn steak with angle blood wine on the side. Also, is the halfling on the menu? If so, that too. By the way, I’m a good cook. Sign this contract and I’ll give the ability to run a nondisaster tavern. All it will cost is your soul...”

* Deryk's face at this point *

“I’m waiting!” he snarls.

" I think all our employees are on paid leave. " Deryk hides behind the counter, " I suggest trying another bar. "

" You know unless an employee will DO THEIR JOB! "

He sets the tavern on fire then says “To match your dragonburgers.” before disappearing.

I guess that's it... 

Sorry Samso but this thread kinda died a while ago... I apologize... * Deep Bow *

Somewhere out there the devil grins as a lemure crawls out of the river styx. It was formerly known as this thread. The end

Meanwhile, at the Green Dragon Inn across the street... of Neverwinter...

Quote from Samso1 >>

Somewhere out there the devil grins as a lemure crawls out of the river styx. It was formerly known as this thread. The end

 The tiefling: "Daaaaaad, please dont embarrass me in front of my frien- [catches himself] -companions."

we all commit thread necromancy

ditto methinks

A tabaxi walks in "is this where the dead people are coming from?"

(holding a knife with bread crumbs and butter off of the tip, and a tiny book with quill)

"If so, can I join?"

Quote from AstortheRouge >>

A tabaxi walks in "is this where the dead people are coming from?"

(holding a knife with bread crumbs and butter off of the tip, and a tiny book with quill)

"If so, can I join?"

 Deryk wakes with a start, " Depends who's asking, what can I get you. "

The tabaxi smirks at Deryk and curtseys deeply "Crushed Rubies in Wedding Bands, is the name and studying the macabre is my game". 

She reveals her book's front which seems to be written in runes (GOOLock, Chloistered Scholar).

"And if your asking for commerce, I will buy a glass of rosé and a pork roast. Also room and board, as I study this phenomenon. Is that all?" 

(Her eyes shift towards the undead and the Tiefling conversing with their father, as she drops her coinage for the meal/drink/and room and board for the first week)

Deryk Yawns, " Okay, as long as you don't blow up the place. " Takes down a key from the wall, " This is the key to your room, see if it's to your liking and your food will be ready momentarily. Just ignore the explosions if there are any. " And with that, Deryk goes to the Kitchen to explain to the chefs that a glass of rose does not mean an actual glass with a rose, and that you don't cast fireball to cook pork

Riddle serves up the food.

Quote from AvalonofWaterdeep >>

Riddle serves up the food.

 Good, riddle does a thing that does not involve injury