A1: The economy is in the opposite of shambles, we'll have to start managing growth! Let's start with positioning ourselves in the logging industry to take over. We'll start by designating A Really Big Tree as subject to logging as part of our attempt to conquer the area. Assorted saws and trucking are called in to help with that big takedown.
A2: So, the BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE has a cult! Well, since plenty of cults hang out near their cult leaders, I'll construct some cult lodgings in the Which House in case they come over. Really this just consists of tossing in some beds and secret society paraphernalia books to make some form of bedroom library hangout, but that's housing in this economy!
A3: ...I should really figure out 'this economy' if I'm going to worry about it so much. I add a fancy analytics computer to the Basement Tinworks and connect it so someone can keep track of how the economy's going on.
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That 'someone' is likely to be the F. Heading over to the analytics computer, they check out how the economy's doing. News reports seem okay? Stock market going alright?
The little economy robots busy themselves on environment analysis efforts, looking for convenient jobs. I've started a logging venture if nothing else, but let's see what's available.
Looks like for the time being we can go back to just charging. Although Sky High does have that Mana point. Which raises the question...
What happens when you combine stage magic with real magic?
Entity Orders:
First, Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees regenerate (if possible).
Then, Sky High enchants Mister Mistoffelees' hat! Mister Mistoffelees reaches in... and pulls out a certain lawyer. He can't be bodyguarded by the tree from here! Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees beat his face in.
I queue up some music, getting ready to rap. The bopping song echoes across the entire field. The Godmodder tenses as I approach, mic in hand. I breath in, and....
Scream as loud as I can at the Godmodder, unleashing a pure wave of sound that attempts to shatter his eardrums. For good measure, i then pick up my boombox and hit him with it.
A1: The economy is in the opposite of shambles, we'll have to start managing growth! Let's start with positioning ourselves in the logging industry to take over. We'll start by designating A Really Big Tree as subject to logging as part of our attempt to conquer the area. Assorted saws and trucking are called in to help with that big takedown.
A2: So, the BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE has a cult! Well, since plenty of cults hang out near their cult leaders, I'll construct some cult lodgings in the Which House in case they come over. Really this just consists of tossing in some beds and secret society paraphernalia books to make some form of bedroom library hangout, but that's housing in this economy!
A3: ...I should really figure out 'this economy' if I'm going to worry about it so much. I add a fancy analytics computer to the Basement Tinworks and connect it so someone can keep track of how the economy's going on.
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That 'someone' is likely to be the F. Heading over to the analytics computer, they check out how the economy's doing. News reports seem okay? Stock market going alright?
The little economy robots busy themselves on environment analysis efforts, looking for convenient jobs. I've started a logging venture if nothing else, but let's see what's available.
Seeing insightfully that there is a valuable and quite large tree available, you start logging it! 20 damage, and you harvest 1 cluster of Iceberries(the tree was, after all, made of snowballing) and (4+5+2=11) Spruce Wood! You also take the time to construct lodgings in the Which House! the Which House is healed for 20 HP, and can now summon Cultists! You upgrade the Tinworks for Economic Analysis!
Looks like for the time being we can go back to just charging. Although Sky High does have that Mana point. Which raises the question...
What happens when you combine stage magic with real magic?
Entity Orders:
First, Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees regenerate (if possible).
Then, Sky High enchants Mister Mistoffelees' hat! Mister Mistoffelees reaches in... and pulls out a certain lawyer. He can't be bodyguarded by the tree from here! Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees beat his face in.
I queue up some music, getting ready to rap. The bopping song echoes across the entire field. The Godmodder tenses as I approach, mic in hand. I breath in, and....
Scream as loud as I can at the Godmodder, unleashing a pure wave of sound that attempts to shatter his eardrums. For good measure, i then pick up my boombox and hit him with it.
Rather than tense, the Godmodder snorts. Really, sound damage? do you know how many times he's dealt with sound damage? He- hey, where did his convenient earmuffs of sound immunity go? While the Godmodder is distracted locating his wayward earmuffs (The BRRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE stole them some time ago), you whack him with your boombox. 1 damage!
Sky High starts enchanting Mister Mistoffelees' Hat! However, even the most efficient teleport spells consume at least two Mana; the enchantment will need at least one more round to complete. In the meantime, Sky High, Leader, and Mistoffelees attack the Mercenaries, killing most of them! They also regenerate appropriately. The F analyses the Economy. Things seem fairly stable on the whole, though the individual best unnamed is accruing an increasingly large share of the economy through his expert administration. There's pretty high demand for food, potions, and the like, which seems to be a constant fixture going back at least months, and the economy is pretty war-oriented. The Economy Robots find there are also openings in farming, fishing, baking, and brewing in the area. There's also an exposed vein of gold not too far away, but it's mostly unremarked on for some reason. The Darkness is Training. It goes very poorly and makes no progress. the etrahedral one's sealed side starts leaking a steady stream of translucent cubes. on it appear the letters 'CTG', for some reason. Sovereign nglish once again idles. John Phoenix's Mercenaries are extremely professional and well-trained, not breaking despite heavy losses. They are also more skilled in combat than anticipated, dealing 18 damage to the Cat. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE decides to target Sovereign nglish... But Sovereign nglish dodges. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE isn't done yet, though! The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE rolls to dodge Sovereign nglish's dodge! which is not how any of that works! Also, it fails the roll, so it doesn't matter! The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE then rolls to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! It still fails! But The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE is insane, and then means it keeps trying! It rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! It fails! So it rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! oooh, so close! but it's off by two! It rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! nope! So it rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! Then, it rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! This roll fails! It then stops being able to make dodge rolls because the description of the dodge roll got longer than a line per roll, which is a good point to stop on. The Which House summons a Cultist. The GLock Robster continues to search for a Glock. John Phoenix continues managing John Phoenix's ventures. One venture John Phoenix Co-owned was a farm. John Phoenix wanted to own the farm entirely, because that would make it much more valuable to Him, because then He would own the entire farm, which would make it easier for Him to manage the farm, which would improve its value, because John Phoenix was very good at management, so John Phoenix wanted to make sure the rest of the owners would abandon the farm. However, John Phoenix was too moral to simply destroy the owners of the farm, because they did not have phones, so it would not be possible to kill them untraceably. But John Phoenix was extremely smart. John Phoenix was so smart that He was the only person who could solve the entirety of His first case in under half a second with one glance at the court record. Not only was John Phoenix smart, but He also had extremely good eyes, which allowed Him to clearly see and read an entire court record in half a second. He had said He had done it in 45 seconds at the time, but that was because He had been concealing His abilities. Revealing the amount of time it had actually taken Him would have made everyone move from the point of being in awe at His skill to being suspicious of the circumstances. At the time the judge and court did not know of His reputation, because He had not had a reputation, because it has been His first case, because there's a first time for anything that happens, so if John Phoenix had said it had taken Him half a second, they would have thought He was lying and had already read the court record before He read the court record, and so would have thought it takes Him possibly as long as minutes or hours to solve a case, which would have been wrong. The reason they would have thought this is that it would not be possible to look through each page in the court record normally in half a second and John Phoenix had in fact not flipped through the court record that fast. But John Phoenix saw using His eyes, which were very good eyes, because they were John Phoenix's eyes, and could see through paper, so He had been able to look at every page of the court record at once. This was how He had been able to read the entire court record in one quarter of a second. He had then solved the case in the remaining quarter of a second using His NASA supercomputer brain. This is all very important, because John Phoenix was using His eyes now. He used His eyes to see. He needed to use His eyes to see because His psychic powers were busy managing His business. Using His eyes, He looked at the town. The town was far away, but His eyes were good eyes, so this didn't matter. He saw that there was a group of people praying to a cow. He immediately was able to tell they were a cult. They were clearly a cult because they were praying, and they were small, and not many people were praying to a cow. Using His NASA supercomputer brain, He remembered a court case He had read about for use as a precedent. This cult would be useful. Using this cult, John Phoenix would be able to destroy His enemies in the farming industry, legally. You see, legally, every member of this cult was a cow. So, John Phoenix could tell the cult to do things without liability, because cows don't speak english, legally speaking. This was because of the cults religious beliefs. they believed that they should all be cows. This was why they had fought to be legally recognized as cows. Cows were a very special animal, according to the cult, because they made milk, and they were cows. this made cows special. Since they were special, they should be free. So, John Phoenix told the cows about how His farm which He only owned part of had cows and told them how to get into it. They would not be breaking the law because they were legally considered cows, because they had fought very hard to qualify as cows in the eyes of the law. John Phoenix was also not breaking the law. Because nobody was breaking the law, this was all legal, so John Phoenix was in the right. Soon the cows were ready and they stormed into the farm and freed all the cows, because the cows in the farm were non-human cows and deserved freedom. John Phoenix then blew the cows cover, leading to a long battle between the cows and the farmers who were not John Phoenix, until eventually the farmers were out of money, and some of the cows were dead. but this was okay, because it was legal to kill cows if nobody owned them, because cows were just animals. Now everyone who owned part of this farm was in debt, except for John Phoenix, so He bought the rest of the farm from them, and now John Phoenix had an entire farm. Using the revenue from His farm, which was a lot, because food was in high demand, because people needed food to live, because otherwise they would starve, John Phoenix bought Himself armor that was like Sky Highs, but more indestructible. He also bought more mercenaries. John Phoenix made sure to use the same posters for recruitment as He had last round, so the Mercenaries did not know John Phoenix's Mercenaries had a high death rate, so they did not charge any more money than last time.
The Godmodder sees an opportunity to be very evil. So, naturally, he takes it, creating a Post-Post-Post Post-Post Post-Post Post-Poster Post, which he lobs through the etrahedral one. ... This doesn't seem to do much of anything.
[A-megamaths] Sky High 483/753 HP, 52A, -40 to incoming damage, 3.1 Player Actions/round, 65 Regen. 1/1 Mana. [A-megamaths] Leader 359/349 HP, 47A, 4.1 Player Actions/Round, -20 to incoming damage. 13Regen. Greater Hollowing. Least Splintering. Lesser Blazing Blood. Lightly Spoiled. [-Nedben] The F 230/230 HP, 6 Regen, -5 To incoming damage, 0.6 Generic Action Capability, 0.1 Shaping💍. 38 Gossamer, +1/Essence/Round. 1 Essence. Solid Frost! in the BRRRRRRRanded One's Basement! Assumption of Air shape (7 G: see P152). Forging the Ring Grace (1E, 1G:see P152). Ordinary Object Conjuration (1+ G: See P153.) Equipped: Regal Tiara (+19 MHP, +0.01 Generic Action Capability, +10% loot. The F's Ring Grace) [-Nedben] Basement Tinworks: 35 HP, completely nullifies external psychic assault! Tracks the Economy. [-Nedben] little economy robots 2x20 HP, 1x20 Economy Cat [Ruth-A][4.5]: HP 227/275, Attack 30, Stage Magic 5 [OG-Lyricsdusk] Darkness given Form 424/1002 HP 435A, blades of abyss,lightless onslaught. Darkness Given Soul ✦✦✦✦✦✦✦✦ SP, and something crawled out, but a hateful mirror. Darkness with purpose.••••••••••. heritage of the black star and the reign of none. [OG-naturewriter]Cosmic Monolith 46/100 HP 75% dodge chance. Dark Pulse(65) Antimatter(25x3) Flash (?) 4/4 Doomsday. [AG] etrahedral one : Sealed. Glass Side. [AG] Military Dames 3x9+2 AP, null attack!A, Guarding Snowball. [AG] Sovereign nglish, a highly reputable nglishman in possession of Ninety Six out of Number Health. 1x10 dodge Points. Sovereign nglishes Abstract Representation of Collected Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Pronouns, and other linguistic paraphernalia is currently: containing, Strain,,,SCHMING, stat, soteric. Regarding his manipulations of the collected paraphernalia, he possesses the following quantity of Degrees of reasonableness: Eight, though this is slowly increasing at a linear rate. [AG] A Really Big Tree 1252 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix to a limited degree! [AG] John Phoenix's Mercenaries 15x14+6x1 HP, 2x15A [GIoPC] The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE 181/430 HP, -32 to Incoming Damage, 5% dodge, -30 HP if not full mana. Eishalon Masked! Cool Staff Bro! 20/20 Mana(2R)! goes BRRRRRRR and E! 82$. 2SP energy. Minor Void Blood. Hat of Hats - 4 (x2 per Hat tip!). Earmuffs of Sound Immunity! Cult! has a custom M16. [GIoPC] Which House 74/194 HP, guarding BRRRRRRRanded One! Co-owned by Nedben! Summons 1 Cultist per round! [GIoPC] Cultists 5x1 HP [GIoPC] GLock Robster, 1 Glock, 31 Rocks 13 Snow, collects 2 Rocks, 0.5 Snow/round [GM] Godmodder: 258 /300 HP 6/6 Demon Who Hunts. 5/100 Self-Actualisation II 4/4 Empirically Infallible Insurance 12/10 Self-Actualisation I 4/2 Noonday Sky 5/5 Give me a Sign! 3/3 if it weighs... the same.. as a duck... Holding 11 HP, 52.68CP stats.
The- Purity embodied. Honorary Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! (Signed photo of Waluigi! Box of Thymemicrophoneamen. has a Safe. full of stuff. and a spike-bush.) Woobydoobydoo: Hella Dosh! Kneecap (+1 Style point! +2ish Attack!). Light Wounds. Founding Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! The Brand shines. Darkside(Alastair Dragovich): Rock Snake Corpse (59 rocks), probably hopelessly confused. went on a sidequest in a vain attempt to become, perhaps, slightly less confused; ended up in a game of monopoly, making them more confused. Megamaths: Light Wounds! Thalai: Proud member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! Truly Ludicrous Supply Of partially-enchanted Kitchen Knives. Water solidification. Cup of ManaTTTTTTT on a T on a T with ttt's. Opposition: Godmodder. 8 Soul Points. Nedben: in possession of a preceding reputation. Fast. has a Solar-Powered Telephonesis Phone, 11 Spruce Wood, 1 bunch of Iceberries. 30-HP shield: Mental Influence Negation! TinyTimCanpy: is sort of Anti Hyphen Taxman. Is alive! 80 HP Shield! Ad JohnPhoenix █████: Moderate Wounds. Poisoned intensely(unaffected?). Speak of the Devil. The ventures of John Phoenix. ███████. Mitigated Geas of Mundanity: will almost-exclusively use mundane or psychic flavor. Lawyer(Decent I Guess), Psychic Missiles, Custom 9mm Mac-10's. Wearing Armor!
Looks like for the time being we can go back to just charging. Although Sky High does have that Mana point. Which raises the question...
What happens when you combine stage magic with real magic?
Entity Orders:
First, Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees regenerate (if possible).
Then, Sky High enchants Mister Mistoffelees' hat! Mister Mistoffelees reaches in... and pulls out a certain lawyer. He can't be bodyguarded by the tree from here! Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees beat his face in.
A1: Ah, there's a shortage of potions? Well, we'll just have to figure out the supply chain for that. But while we're by the house, workshopping. I upgrade the Which House to add on kitchens, setting up appropriate preparation and storage areas so we can work on the food side. This should help with baking and brewing operations locally in the event of further buyouts.
A2: As significant farming has been bought out by an adversary who naming is not advisable, I invest in a sustainable fishery operation on the side.
A3: I sorcerously genetically engineer plants that produce relevant potion supplies (basically a more adaptive Omni Plant that comes preloaded with the information to synthesize certain common products if nobody's provided them with what constitutes 'relevant' to copy, so it can produce whatever basic goods like ordinary foodstuffs if not otherwise tasked) and garden them by the Which House kitchen for on-site production.
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The F continues monitoring, paying particular attention to the possible shakeup in the food markets due to consolidated expert management and whether our recent support is likely at scale enough to matter.
The little economy robots get various jobs based on what openings they're capable of filling at their stature. A group of prospectors breaks off to identify the exposed gold and its potential value: is gold even relevant around here or would it be better off processed into orichalcum?
A guy falls from the sky and spontaneously disassembles into a pile of code bits. All these pixellated code bits spray on the Godmodder, and it must be known that pixels are /sharp/!
A1: In the Which House I create a gunjuration portal that allows me to access the worlds inside bullets...including souls of bullets inside other bullets!
A2: I use necromancy and the gunjuration portal so I can set up a method to gain access to the evil ghosts and evil people (and the bullets inside bullets, for good measure), possibly by cheesing what qualifies as inside or outside bullets.
A3: Negotiating with the evil terrorists (and bullets), I work out an arrangement where I can summon them as terror operations to commit terrorism. I'm not sure what I can use evil ghosts and such for right now but we can figure out ghost-operable weapons later once we discuss the ghosts' (and bullets') capabilities.
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The F feels sorry for the GLock Robster and decides to....start making Glock parts? The parts might actually put together and make a whole Glock depending on object ordinariness. I'm not really sure how much gossamer that's going to take but the F can figure it out as they try I guess.
The little economy robots keep manning the economy, with the prospector squad attempting to mine some gold from that gold vein over there.
A1: The guy gets up, brushes himself off, and jumps into a nearby car. He then proceeds to crash... into the stock market. The stocks take a nosedive (due to the guy attempting to activate the car's Plane Mode), rendering John Phoenix's riches completely worthless.
A2: The guy takes out his trusty McZepp Enterprises Match Youth Proceed, the pinnacle of console entertainment, and begins building a couple of four-to-eight second "puny-games". (Charge start, I guess? 1/?)
A3: The guy, who is me let's stop kidding around, wears the Godmodder as a hat. I then turn over an hourglass, plunging myself into the Underbattlefield for my hubris. Why did I think I could wield the inexorable power of time??? The world will never know.
A1: In the Which House I create a gunjuration portal that allows me to access the worlds inside bullets...including souls of bullets inside other bullets!
A2: I use necromancy and the gunjuration portal so I can set up a method to gain access to the evil ghosts and evil people (and the bullets inside bullets, for good measure), possibly by cheesing what qualifies as inside or outside bullets.
A3: Negotiating with the evil terrorists (and bullets), I work out an arrangement where I can summon them as terror operations to commit terrorism. I'm not sure what I can use evil ghosts and such for right now but we can figure out ghost-operable weapons later once we discuss the ghosts' (and bullets') capabilities.
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The F feels sorry for the GLock Robster and decides to....start making Glock parts? The parts might actually put together and make a whole Glock depending on object ordinariness. I'm not really sure how much gossamer that's going to take but the F can figure it out as they try I guess.
The little economy robots keep manning the economy, with the prospector squad attempting to mine some gold from that gold vein over there.
You gain access to the worlds inside of bullets inside bullets! But removing the souls from bullets inside bullets was impossible. No one could free someone from an angel bullet, not even G*D. Your necromantic magic fails to extract them.
A1: The guy gets up, brushes himself off, and jumps into a nearby car. He then proceeds to crash... into the stock market. The stocks take a nosedive (due to the guy attempting to activate the car's Plane Mode), rendering John Phoenix's riches completely worthless.
A2: The guy takes out his trusty McZepp Enterprises Match Youth Proceed, the pinnacle of console entertainment, and begins building a couple of four-to-eight second "puny-games". (Charge start, I guess? 1/?)
A3: The guy, who is me let's stop kidding around, wears the Godmodder as a hat. I then turn over an hourglass, plunging myself into the Underbattlefield for my hubris. Why did I think I could wield the inexorable power of time??? The world will never know.
You crash the stock market!... But almost all of John Phoenix's wealth is by owning and directly managing corporations with genuine value, such as farms. Even with the stock market in a nosedive, He can continue to sell products for an almost untouched stream of profit! You begin developing various mini-games! +0.3 Charge Progress from the pun! You then wear the Godmodder and attempt to trap him in the underbattlefield! success!... wait, why isn't this Godmodder moving? You suddenly realize this is not the Godmodder, but a Godmodder-shaped hat! blast! You are now in the Underbattlefield! It looks a lot like a cave system.
Sky High and Leader idle and regen. The F creates a Glock using 1 Gossamer! The Economy Robots obtain 4 more units of grain and 1 unit of Gold! the Cat auto-attacks the Mercenaries, killing 2 of them! The Darkness is Training. It goes well! +16 attack, and +45 HP! Sovereign nglish idles. John Phoenix's Mercenaries hit the Cat with their swords and their spears and their daggers and their bows and their arrows and their weapons and their limbs again and again until eventually they hit the Cat so much and move their limbs so often they get tired and stop, dealing 60 damage! The emotional impact of seeing the Cat hurt by John Phoenix's Mercanaries deals 3 damage to Sky High and 4 to Leader! The BANG RRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE decides to target The Godmodder! They do this using the Custom M16 they stole from John Phoenix! Its bullets are faster than most other bullets, so they fired before The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE pulled the trigger! But The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE didn't know how much faster, because unlike John Phoenix, The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE had never used John Phoenix's custom M16, which worked differently from normal M16s, because it had been made just for John Phoenix, and was customised to be better for John Phoenix and not anyone else, so instead of the bullet going to hit the Godmodder, The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE accidentally shot themself in the foot for 40 damage, like the idiot they, as a person who opposed John Phoenix, surely were. John Phoenix did not snort at this, however. John Phoenix was busy. John Phoenix was busy because He was doing important things. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE then did many other hilarious and incompetent things, but they were so nonsensical that trying to describe it would be pointless, so let's see what John Phoenix is up to instead. John Phoenix was running his businesses. This was a task which required his utmost concentration, because it was a tumultuous time. It was a tumultuous time because the stock market was going down very quickly. The stock market continued to go down quickly. John Phoenix was not bothered by this, however. John Phoenix knew how to take advantage of anything, even the stock market going down very quickly, which it was doing because it was crashing. John Phoenix knew what a short was. It was a good way to make money off the stock market going down very quickly. But John Phoenix had not expected the stock market to begin crashing, so he did not sell any shorts. the reason he did not expect it to begin crashing was because it should not be crashing. But it was crashing anyway. This was very puzzling, but not for John Phoenix. John Phoenix was very smart. He had a high IQ. This IQ was many times higher than his uncle, Phoenix Wright, who he had surpassed since he was a baby in all factors except height, and surpassed in height some time ago. It was also many times higher than the IQ of everyone else involved in the economy. So despite that the stock market should not be crashing, John Phoenix was not puzzled by its crashing. This was because John Phoenix had a good memory. He also had precise information. Because of this, he knew that the stock market had started crashing when 'The guy' had crashed into the Stock Market. This meant he knew why the stock market was crashing, because he was able to make connections between events. This was why John Phoenix was not puzzled by the crashing stock market. In fact, this was a good opportunity. John Phoenix could use his riches to purchase additional stocks in other companies. When the stock market finished crashing, this would make him much richer. John Phoenix considered this plan and concluded it was a good plan. But it was not a perfect plan. That was okay, however, because there was no such thing as a perfect plan. There was no such thing as a perfect plan because things could go wrong. this was why John Phoenix's plan of buying stocks was not perfect. However, John Phoenix would be able to skillfully decide when to buy stocks, allowing him to turn it into a perfect plan by making things go right. this was why John Phoenix was so rich, because he always made things go right. Using some of his other money, John Phoenix lobbied for it to be illegal for the dead to testify in court. He had a very good argument. his argument was that "the dead can't be trusted! Dead people are dead, so they are either in hell or heaven, and everyone in heaven is busy praying to G*D. so all the dead people we see are from hell, which people go to when they are evil and terrorists, unlike heaven, which has no terrorists.". and he was right. He was right because he knew a lot about heaven and hell, because he had been to heaven court, because he had needed to avoid the plot of John Dragon, which was on earth. He also had other reasons which were also good. John Phoenix also got a potion for himself and drank it, so he was now containing only Major wounds. This was free because he owned a potion brewery now, because he had bought a controlling share from the nosediving stock market. He had bought these stocks even though the market was still nosediving, because he wanted the brewery, not just the stocks. This showed that sometimes even smart people who could outperform the stock market would make choices which would temporarily lead to them having lower value stocks. John Phoenix was then done his turn. Earlier, however, when the BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE was doing things, other people had also been doing things. also, other things had been happening. things had occurred. here are those things. The Which House summons a Cultist! One Cultist mans the farm and plant, producing 1 Potion supply, trout meat, and trout oil! a second cultist uses 2 Barley Grain and 2 Trout Oil to make a health potion! It can heal 8 HP! The GLock Robster steals the Glock made by The F, gaining 1 Glock! It's extremely happy about this turn of events.
The Godmodder stealthily changes two details in the battlefield! If not detected (as a free action), the changes will become permanent!
[A-megamaths] Sky High 570/753 HP, 52A, adds 40 to incoming damage, 3.1 Player Actions/round, 65 Regen. 1/1 Mana. [A-megamaths] Leader 355/369 HP, 47A, 4.1 Player Actions/Round, -20 to incoming damage. 13Regen. Greater Hollowing. Least Splintering. Lesser Blazing Blood. Lightly Spoiled. [-Nedben] The F 242/242 HP, 6 Regen, -5 To incoming damage, 0.6 Generic Action Capability, 0.1 Shaping💍. 39 Gossamer, +1/Essence/Round. 1 Essence. Solid Frost! in the BRRRRRRRanded One's Basement! Assumption of Air shape (7 G: see P152). Forging the Ring Grace (1E, 1G:see P152). Ordinary Object Conjuration (1+ G: See P153.) Not Equipped: Regal Tiara (+19 MHP, +0.01 Generic Action Capability, +10% loot. The F's Ring Grace) [-Nedben] Basement Tinworks: 35 HP, completely nullifies external psychic assault! Tracks the Economy. [-Nedben] little economy robots 2x20 HP, 1x20 Economy Cat [Ruth-A][4.5]: HP 132/275, Attack 30, Stage Magic 5 [OG-Lyricsdusk] Darkness given Form 475/1053 HP 453A, blades of abyss,lightless onslaught. Darkness Given Soul ✦✦✦✦✦✦✦✦ SP, and something crawled out, but a hateful mirror. Darkness with purpose.••••••••••. heritage of the black star and the reign of none. [OG-naturewriter]Cosmic Monolith 46/100 HP 75% dodge chance. Dark Pulse(65) Antimatter(25x3) Flash (?) 4/4 Doomsday. [AG] etrahedral one : Sealed. Glass Side. [AG] Sovereign nglish, a highly reputable nglishman in possession of Ninety Six out of Number Health. 1x10 dodge Points. Sovereign nglishes Abstract Representation of Collected Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Pronouns, and other linguistic paraphernalia is currently: Strain,,,SCHMING, stat, soteric. Regarding his manipulations of the collected paraphernalia, he possesses the following quantity of Degrees of reasonableness: Nine, though this is slowly increasing at a linear rate. [AG] A Really Big Tree 1252 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix to a limited degree! [AG] John Phoenix's Mercenaries 15x24+6x1 HP, 2x25A [GIoPC] The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE 141/430 HP, -32 to Incoming Damage, 5% dodge, -30 HP if not full mana. Eishalon Masked! Cool Staff Bro! 20/20 Mana(2R)! goes BRRRRRRR and E! 82$. 2SP energy. Minor Void Blood. Hat of Hats - 4 (x2 per Hat tip!). Earmuffs of Sound Immunity! Cult! has a custom M16. [GIoPC] Which House 74/194 HP, guarding BRRRRRRRanded One! Co-owned by Nedben! Summons 1 Cultist per round! Produces 1 Potion Supply, Trout Meat, and Trout Oil per round! Cooking/Brewing Station. Stored: 2 Potion supply, 2 Trout Meat, 0 Trout Oil, 6 Barley Grains, 1 Gold, 1 Potion. [GIoPC] Cultists 5x3 HP [GIoPC] GLock Robster, 2 Glock, 35 Rocks 14 Snow, collects 2 Rocks, 0.5 Snow/round [GM] Godmodder: 258 /300 HP 1/? Fake Evidence 6/6 Demon Who Hunts. 5/100 Self-Actualisation II 4/4 Empirically Infallible Insurance 12/10 Self-Actualisation I 4/2 Noonday Sky 5/5 Give me a Sign! 3/3 if it weighs... the same.. as a duck... Holding 11 HP, 52.68CP stats.
The- Purity embodied. Honorary Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! (Signed photo of Waluigi! Box of Thymemicrophoneamen. has a Safe. full of stuff. and a spike-bush.) Woobydoobydoo: Hella Dosh! Kneecap (+1 Style point! +2ish Attack!). Light Wounds. Founding Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! The Brand shines. Darkside(Alastair Dragovich): Rock Snake Corpse (59 rocks), probably hopelessly confused. went on a sidequest in a vain attempt to become, perhaps, slightly less confused; ended up in a game of monopoly, making them more confused. Megamaths: Light Wounds! Thalai: Proud member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! Truly Ludicrous Supply Of partially-enchanted Kitchen Knives. Water solidification. Cup of ManaTTTTTTT on a T on a T with ttt's. Opposition: Godmodder. 8 Soul Points. Nedben: in possession of a preceding reputation. Fast. has a Solar-Powered Telephonesis Phone, 11 Spruce Wood, 1 bunch of Iceberries. 30-HP shield: Mental Influence Negation! TinyTimCanpy: is sort of Anti Hyphen Taxman. Is alive! 80 HP Shield! KingFuffy: in the underbattlefield! Ad JohnPhoenix █████: containing Major Wounds. Poisoned intensely(unaffected?). Speak of the Devil. The ventures of John Phoenix. ███████. Mitigated Geas of Mundanity: will almost-exclusively use mundane or psychic flavor. Lawyer(Decent I Guess), Psychic Missiles, Custom 9mm Mac-10's.
Free: The F already-equips its Regal Tiara, that Not Equipped is incorrect.
Also free: Sky High should subtract 40 incoming damage, not add it.
A1+A2+A3: I combine the power to make the impossible possible with the power of No One. By the armament of Da Vinci I am become Pioneer of the Stars. By the power of Odysseus I obtain the power to be 'No One, not even G*D' to wield that truth as written as one who could. And with this I will surpass the foul curses laid by the edges of possibility. I will again grant liberation to the sealed.
If this is not enough, I will begin the journey toward more with this. Inventors, sailors, whatever it takes, I have a new thing to obsess over.
-
The F uses the computer and that Ad in the battlefield to design some advertisements.
The little economy robots continue participating in the economy.
3.1 - Sky High activates his wings, flies high into the air, and dives at absurdly high speeds! He divebombs a certain lawyer and thrusts his spear!
But he doesn't hit the lawyer. He hits juuuuust to the lawyer's right. But what effect does this have?
Simple! juuuuuuust to the lawyer's right is the word "Containing." It's now forcefully dislodged from the lawyer's stat block!
(All other actions charge.)
Entity orders: Mister Mistoffelees and Sky High combine their magic to distract the tree that's bodyguarding the lawyer. Then, both of them and Leader attack the lawyer.
Leader and Sky High regenerate HP. Sky High fixes the DR in his statblock - it should reduce, not add.
Free: The F already-equips its Regal Tiara, that Not Equipped is incorrect.
Also free: Sky High should subtract 40 incoming damage, not add it.
A1+A2+A3: I combine the power to make the impossible possible with the power of No One. By the armament of Da Vinci I am become Pioneer of the Stars. By the power of Odysseus I obtain the power to be 'No One, not even G*D' to wield that truth as written as one who could. And with this I will surpass the foul curses laid by the edges of possibility. I will again grant liberation to the sealed.
If this is not enough, I will begin the journey toward more with this. Inventors, sailors, whatever it takes, I have a new thing to obsess over.
-
The F uses the computer and that Ad in the battlefield to design some advertisements.
The little economy robots continue participating in the economy.
You successfully catch, and neutralise, both of the Godmodder's modifications! No One, not even G*D saves the souls from the bullet in the bullet in the bullet! 8 Evil Terrorist Farmers summoned! 4 Evil Ghosts summoned! The Evil Terrorist Farmers have the power to be evil terrorists, and also to farm things! The Evil Ghosts have the power to be a nuisance!
As an aside, it seems like I've not been clear on this, so I'll restate it - The F's shaping action is a bonus action. they can both perform shaping and do their normal action, in the same turn.
A1: I explore the Underbattlefield and try to pick up some cool rocks.
A2: I build more microgamez. (2/?)
A3: Now's my chance to be a big shot. I stab myself with a giant syringe, boosting my capabilities slightly.
You explore the Underbattlefield! the cave runs into what looks to be an underground ruin of some kind. there's also a branch that forks upwards, which seems to be just more tunnel. you find 4 pieces of worn memorabilia for something unidentified; they seem to be carved out of granite. you also find 3 green crystals shaped roughly like rupees. You continue to build your microgames! you got +0.3 charge progress last round, so you're at 2.3, not 2. You stab yourself with a giant syringe! until you next take damage, your base action power is increased by 1 point!
3.1 - Sky High activates his wings, flies high into the air, and dives at absurdly high speeds! He divebombs a certain lawyer and thrusts his spear!
But he doesn't hit the lawyer. He hits juuuuust to the lawyer's right. But what effect does this have?
Simple! juuuuuuust to the lawyer's right is the word "Containing." It's now forcefully dislodged from the lawyer's stat block!
(All other actions charge.)
Entity orders: Mister Mistoffelees and Sky High combine their magic to distract the tree that's bodyguarding the lawyer. Then, both of them and Leader attack the lawyer.
Leader and Sky High regenerate HP. Sky High fixes the DR in his statblock - it should reduce, not add.
You charge! The lawyer in question is no longer Containing their major wounds! they are now majorly wounded again, reducing their action power substantially! Sky High's DR was already fixed by Nedben! he receives 1 additional DR for his troubles.
Mistoffelees tries to distract the Really Big Tree! [1d20:3] ...this goes poorly, seeing as it is... a tree. not very distractable things, trees. Mistoffelees, Sky High, and Leader then attack the lawyer! A Really Big Tree blocks Sky High and Leader, but Mistoffelees gets through, reducing their target to Critical Wounds! the other two deal 99 damage to A Really Big Tree, and regenerate. The F designs some advertisements! What are you advertising, to be clear? I mean, I'm sure these are good advertisements, but what are they for? The Economy Robots produce 4 more Barley Grains and 1 more Gold! (The existence of the Evil Terrorist Farmers leads to a change to the numbering of Economy for future math ease. This has not altered the actual value of the Economy Robots.) The Darkness Is Training. It goes 'aight, +26 HP and +5 attack. Sovereign nglish idles again. John Phoenix's Mercenaries attack the Cat again, dealing 50 more damage. They also patch up the single injured mercenary for 9 health. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE decides to target... himself! yes, not even The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE is safe from the terrible scourge that is The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE's indiscriminate and completely random attacks! The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE wallops itself in the face and falls over from the force! 1 damage! Then they get up and do it again! 1 damage! with a mighty slam, it hits itself in the face with its Staff, producing an explosion of elemental damage for 3 damage! phew, now, that sure was tiring. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE goes to sleep and has a nap, healing itself for 5 health. The Which House summons another cultist! one cultist harvests the plant and fish! another cultist uses 2 trout meat and 2 barley grain to make a Snack. it heals for 4 HP per round for 3 rounds. the third cultist idles. The GLock Robster polishes its Glocks happily. John Phoenix is Critically wounded, but that doesn't completely remove his ability to increase his wealth through skillful business decisions. Nor does it ensure his demise; the wounds aren't mortal wounds. John Phoenix knows his survival, as the greatest defence attorney to ever live, is worth any amount of money, because John Phoenix is smart enough to know the difference between true and false modesty and knows just how good he is. John Phoenix looked down from his perch on A Very Big Tree, even as honestly quite impressive quantities of blackish-purple blood poured out of his wounds, and spent a lot of money, which was enough money to buy many things. John Phoenix grew more determined as he spent this money. He was determined because he had reason to be determined, because to survive he had to be determined, because determined sounded like de-termined, which was sort of like saying undead, something John Phoenix might have to become to survive. But, owing to his Critical wounds, John Phoenix was not able to make nearly as good of a deal as he normally made, and ended up becoming much less wealthy, and only managed to buy 8 Mercenary Meatshields. Still, John Phoenix knew he was going to survive. but he was, of course, wrong.
The Godmodder picks up the little Economy Robots, rolls them all into a ball, set it on fire, and throws it through the ground at The F! The Economy Ball then explodes, dealing 190 damage to The F and completely wrecking the Tinworks! If he can't dominate his foes, he'll just kill them! Hmph!
[A-megamaths] Sky High 635/753 HP, 52A, -41 to incoming damage, 3.1 Player Actions/round, 65 Regen. 1/1 Mana. [A-megamaths] Leader 365/369 HP, 47A, 4.1 Player Actions/Round, -20 to incoming damage. 13Regen. Greater Hollowing. Least Splintering. Lesser Blazing Blood. Lightly Spoiled. [-Nedben] The F 58/248 HP, 6 Regen, -5 To incoming damage, 0.6 Generic Action Capability, 0.1 Shaping💍. 40 Gossamer, +1/Essence/Round. 1 Essence. Solid Frost! in the BRRRRRRRanded One's Basement! Assumption of Air shape (7 G: see P152). Forging the Ring Grace (1E, 1G:see P152). Ordinary Object Conjuration (1+ G: See P153.) Equipped: Regal Tiara (+19 MHP, +0.01 Generic Action Capability, +10% loot. The F's Ring Grace) [-Nedben] Basement Tinworks: 0 HP, completely nullifies external psychic assault! Tracks the Economy. [-Nedben] little economy robots 2x0 HP, 0.25x0 Economy [-Nedben] Evil Terrorist Farmers 5x8 HP, 1x8 Farmerly Terrorism [-Nedben] Evil Ghosts 2x4 HP, 50% dodge, 1x4 Nuisance!A Cat [Ruth-A][4.5]: HP 82/275, Attack 30, Stage Magic 5 [OG-Lyricsdusk] Darkness given Form 501/1079 HP 458A, blades of abyss,lightless onslaught. Darkness Given Soul ✦✦✦✦✦✦✦✦ SP, and something crawled out, but a hateful mirror. Darkness with purpose.••••••••••. heritage of the black star and the reign of none. [OG-naturewriter]Cosmic Monolith 46/100 HP 75% dodge chance. Dark Pulse(65) Antimatter(25x3) Flash (?) 4/4 Doomsday. [AG] etrahedral one : Sealed. Glass Side. [AG] Sovereign nglish, a highly reputable nglishman in possession of Ninety Six out of Number Health. 1x10 dodge Points. Sovereign nglishes Abstract Representation of Collected Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Pronouns, and other linguistic paraphernalia is currently: Strain,,,SCHMING, stat, soteric. Regarding his manipulations of the collected paraphernalia, he possesses the following quantity of Degrees of reasonableness: Ten, though this is slowly increasing at a linear rate. [AG] A Really Big Tree 1153 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix to a limited degree! [AG] John Phoenix's Mercenaries 15x25 HP, 2x25A [AG] John Phoenix's Meatshields 15x8 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix. [GIoPC] The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE 141/430 HP, -32 to Incoming Damage, 5% dodge, -30 HP if not full mana. Eishalon Masked! Cool Staff Bro! 20/20 Mana(2R)! goes BRRRRRRR and E! 82$. 2SP energy. Minor Void Blood. Hat of Hats - 32 (x2 per Hat tip!). Earmuffs of Sound Immunity! Cult! has a custom M16. [GIoPC] Which House 74/194 HP, guarding BRRRRRRRanded One! Co-owned by Nedben! Summons 1 Cultist per round! Produces 1 Potion Supply, Trout Meat, and Trout Oil per round! Cooking/Brewing Station. Stored: 3 Potion supply, 1 Trout Meat, 1 Trout Oil, 8 Barley Grains, 2 Gold, 1 Potion, 1 Snack. [GIoPC] Cultists 5x4 HP [GIoPC] GLock Robster, 2 Glock, 37 Rocks 14.5 Snow, collects 2 Rocks, 0.5 Snow/round [GM] Godmodder: 258 /300 HP 1/? Fake Evidence 6/6 Demon Who Hunts. 5/100 Self-Actualisation II 4/4 Empirically Infallible Insurance 12/10 Self-Actualisation I 4/2 Noonday Sky 5/5 Give me a Sign! 3/3 if it weighs... the same.. as a duck... Holding 11 HP, 52.68CP stats.
The- Purity embodied. Honorary Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! (Signed photo of Waluigi! Box of Thymemicrophoneamen. has a Safe. full of stuff. and a spike-bush.) Woobydoobydoo: Hella Dosh! Kneecap (+1 Style point! +2ish Attack!). Light Wounds. Founding Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! The Brand shines. Darkside(Alastair Dragovich): Rock Snake Corpse (59 rocks), probably hopelessly confused. went on a sidequest in a vain attempt to become, perhaps, slightly less confused; ended up in a game of monopoly, making them more confused. Megamaths: Light Wounds! Thalai: Proud member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! Truly Ludicrous Supply Of partially-enchanted Kitchen Knives. Water solidification. Cup of ManaTTTTTTT on a T on a T with ttt's. Opposition: Godmodder. 8 Soul Points. Nedben: in possession of a preceding reputation. Fast. has a Solar-Powered Telephonesis Phone, 11 Spruce Wood, 1 bunch of Iceberries. 30-HP shield: Mental Influence Negation! TinyTimCanpy: is sort of Anti Hyphen Taxman. Is alive! 80 HP Shield! KingFuffy: in the underbattlefield! 4 Granite Memorabilia, 3. JohnPhoenix █████: Critical Wounds. Poisoned intensely(unaffected?). Speak of the Devil. The depleted ventures of John Phoenix. ███████. Mitigated Geas of Mundanity: will almost-exclusively use mundane or psychic flavor. Lawyer(Decent I Guess), Psychic Missiles, Custom 9mm Mac-10's. Containing
A1: Glaring daggers at your enemies is overdone, so I glare lens flare at the Godmodder instead. They are beset by shiny. The resulting lighting is overly bright and distracting, but transient.
A2: Seeing the wide variety of injuries on display, this wartime economy could really use better medical healthcare. I set up an infirmary in the Which House because we probably need somewhere to treat our allies.
A3: Using the powers of rapid wood-aspect reconstruction, I acquire healing herbs and make a poultice for the F, applying it because that sounds like something healing-y I can do.
-
The F uses its regular action to further recover from explosion trauma by stabilizing and resupplying the ice making up its primary Assumption.
Shapingwise, it spins the tale of a space for recovery where principles tend toward reconstruction and maintenance, improving the effectiveness of the infirmary for this round because it really does need to focus on healing. The F also reveals the ads were for... this house! It's for the cult apparently.
The evil terrorist farmers man the farming operation, which is mostly sorting the food and potion supplies and tending the omni plants.
The evil ghosts annoy Sovereign nglish because why not I guess.
4.1 (+1 Mana) - Leader notices Mister Mistoffelees is in danger! This simply won't do, so Leader and Sky High use Sky High's Mana to conjure up a Magical Medkit, which they smash over Mister Mistoffelees's head. Now, if you smashed a regular medkit over a regular cat's head, it would hurt. But this is a Magical Medkit and a Magical Cat. So instead it heals. A lot.
3 - Want to do something right? ....Gotta do it yourself.
I temporarily borrow T's action power, which is really just mine. Suddenly, my massive hand reaches through the Fourth Wall and squeezes... a certain lawyer... to death!
Remaining actions used to charge.
Leader and Sky High regenerate. Leader and Sky High attack the lawyer who shall remain nameless, unless he's already dead. In that case they do not attack at all.
A1: I pick up some more rocks, focusing on those shiny crystals........
...why do I want these...?
...
...
...
!
FLASHBACK NEO CARAMELISEATTLE
The streets bustle with people. It is a lovely day, and your name is KEANE MCZUPP. As you walk peacefully down the NEO CARAMELISEATTLE STREET, something catches your eye in a shop window... a DELICIOUS CARAMEL APPLE.
You salivate over the CARAMEL APPLE for several minutes, before checking the price-tag...
KEANE MCZUPP: ONE TRILLION ECONOMY???????
This will not STAND! You call up your FLOATSHIP, hop in, and BLAST OFF to another planet to gather the currency you need for that DELICIOUS CARAMEL APPLE, one step at a time!
END FLASHBACK
A2: I build more microgames, this time including one where you break a window and steal a candy apple, and another one where you sell John Phoenix faulty mercenaries. (3.3/?)
A1: I pick up one of the skeletons lying around and set up a revitalization system to have blood production in it or something. This produces extra blood for the blood sacrifices, because we don't want to run out of blood to sacrifice before we've even exsanguinated the cult or whatever.
A2: I bake the Godmodder into a pie. They are now in a pie tray, surrounded by pie filling and topped with a pie crust. Why? Why not.
A3: I ask the Darkness given Form what it's doing and why it's here, because I am distracted by battle and not reading the backlog.
-
The F decides to start writing cult scripture and exegesis or something because publishing what this is even a cult about would probably be useful. I guess it's time to become a novelist? Spend gossamer for miscellaneous writing supplies as appropriate.
Shapingwise it spins the story of 'atmosphere conducive to writing', making the place suitable for putting pen to paper and words to word processing software should anyone see fit to join them in publication.
A1: I float over the side of the balcony and down to the altar, checking it for artifacts or items.
A2: I push a button on my FLOATSHIP. (Which is a small hover-chair that is normally capable of interstellar travel, but right now that feature is broken.) The RESOURCE-MAGNET activates, drawing minuscule bits of relevant material towards me.
A3: I take the 0.6 Charge Progress and use it to charge my Match Youth Proceed. AKA I add it to the charge. (4.9/?)
10.2: Sky High and Leader decide Mister Mistoffelees is in too much danger. So they give him 10 charge-worth of HP regen and 0.2 charge-worth of Stage Magic.
Sky High bodyguards Mister Misoffelees. All entities regenerate. They also only attack if attacked.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
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A1: The economy is in the opposite of shambles, we'll have to start managing growth! Let's start with positioning ourselves in the logging industry to take over. We'll start by designating A Really Big Tree as subject to logging as part of our attempt to conquer the area. Assorted saws and trucking are called in to help with that big takedown.
A2: So, the BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE has a cult! Well, since plenty of cults hang out near their cult leaders, I'll construct some cult lodgings in the Which House in case they come over. Really this just consists of tossing in some beds and secret society paraphernalia books to make some form of bedroom library hangout, but that's housing in this economy!
A3: ...I should really figure out 'this economy' if I'm going to worry about it so much. I add a fancy analytics computer to the Basement Tinworks and connect it so someone can keep track of how the economy's going on.
-
That 'someone' is likely to be the F. Heading over to the analytics computer, they check out how the economy's doing. News reports seem okay? Stock market going alright?
The little economy robots busy themselves on environment analysis efforts, looking for convenient jobs. I've started a logging venture if nothing else, but let's see what's available.
190.1/300
Looks like for the time being we can go back to just charging. Although Sky High does have that Mana point. Which raises the question...
What happens when you combine stage magic with real magic?
Entity Orders:
First, Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees regenerate (if possible).
Then, Sky High enchants Mister Mistoffelees' hat! Mister Mistoffelees reaches in... and pulls out a certain lawyer. He can't be bodyguarded by the tree from here! Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees beat his face in.
I queue up some music, getting ready to rap. The bopping song echoes across the entire field. The Godmodder tenses as I approach, mic in hand. I breath in, and....
Scream as loud as I can at the Godmodder, unleashing a pure wave of sound that attempts to shatter his eardrums. For good measure, i then pick up my boombox and hit him with it.
Seeing insightfully that there is a valuable and quite large tree available, you start logging it! 20 damage, and you harvest 1 cluster of Iceberries(the tree was, after all, made of snowballing) and (4+5+2=11) Spruce Wood!
You also take the time to construct lodgings in the Which House! the Which House is healed for 20 HP, and can now summon Cultists!
You upgrade the Tinworks for Economic Analysis!
You charge!
Rather than tense, the Godmodder snorts. Really, sound damage? do you know how many times he's dealt with sound damage? He-
- Purity embodied. Honorary Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club!
hey, where did his convenient earmuffs of sound immunity go?
While the Godmodder is distracted locating his wayward earmuffs (The BRRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE stole them some time ago), you whack him with your boombox. 1 damage!
Sky High starts enchanting Mister Mistoffelees' Hat! However, even the most efficient teleport spells consume at least two Mana; the enchantment will need at least one more round to complete. In the meantime, Sky High, Leader, and Mistoffelees attack the Mercenaries, killing most of them! They also regenerate appropriately.
The F analyses the Economy. Things seem fairly stable on the whole, though the individual best unnamed is accruing an increasingly large share of the economy through his expert administration. There's pretty high demand for food, potions, and the like, which seems to be a constant fixture going back at least months, and the economy is pretty war-oriented.
The Economy Robots find there are also openings in farming, fishing, baking, and brewing in the area. There's also an exposed vein of gold not too far away, but it's mostly unremarked on for some reason.
The Darkness is Training. It goes very poorly and makes no progress.
the etrahedral one's sealed side starts leaking a steady stream of translucent cubes. on it appear the letters 'CTG', for some reason.
Sovereign nglish once again idles.
John Phoenix's Mercenaries are extremely professional and well-trained, not breaking despite heavy losses. They are also more skilled in combat than anticipated, dealing 18 damage to the Cat.
The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE decides to target Sovereign nglish... But Sovereign nglish dodges. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE isn't done yet, though! The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE rolls to dodge Sovereign nglish's dodge! which is not how any of that works! Also, it fails the roll, so it doesn't matter!
The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE then rolls to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! It still fails! But The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE is insane, and then means it keeps trying! It rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! It fails! So it rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! oooh, so close! but it's off by two! It rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! nope! So it rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! Then, it rolls to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its roll to dodge the failure of its dodge roll! This roll fails! It then stops being able to make dodge rolls because the description of the dodge roll got longer than a line per roll, which is a good point to stop on.
The Which House summons a Cultist.
The GLock Robster continues to search for a Glock.
John Phoenix continues managing John Phoenix's ventures. One venture John Phoenix Co-owned was a farm. John Phoenix wanted to own the farm entirely, because that would make it much more valuable to Him, because then He would own the entire farm, which would make it easier for Him to manage the farm, which would improve its value, because John Phoenix was very good at management, so John Phoenix wanted to make sure the rest of the owners would abandon the farm. However, John Phoenix was too moral to simply destroy the owners of the farm, because they did not have phones, so it would not be possible to kill them untraceably. But John Phoenix was extremely smart. John Phoenix was so smart that He was the only person who could solve the entirety of His first case in under half a second with one glance at the court record. Not only was John Phoenix smart, but He also had extremely good eyes, which allowed Him to clearly see and read an entire court record in half a second. He had said He had done it in 45 seconds at the time, but that was because He had been concealing His abilities. Revealing the amount of time it had actually taken Him would have made everyone move from the point of being in awe at His skill to being suspicious of the circumstances. At the time the judge and court did not know of His reputation, because He had not had a reputation, because it has been His first case, because there's a first time for anything that happens, so if John Phoenix had said it had taken Him half a second, they would have thought He was lying and had already read the court record before He read the court record, and so would have thought it takes Him possibly as long as minutes or hours to solve a case, which would have been wrong. The reason they would have thought this is that it would not be possible to look through each page in the court record normally in half a second and John Phoenix had in fact not flipped through the court record that fast. But John Phoenix saw using His eyes, which were very good eyes, because they were John Phoenix's eyes, and could see through paper, so He had been able to look at every page of the court record at once. This was how He had been able to read the entire court record in one quarter of a second. He had then solved the case in the remaining quarter of a second using His NASA supercomputer brain. This is all very important, because John Phoenix was using His eyes now. He used His eyes to see. He needed to use His eyes to see because His psychic powers were busy managing His business. Using His eyes, He looked at the town. The town was far away, but His eyes were good eyes, so this didn't matter. He saw that there was a group of people praying to a cow. He immediately was able to tell they were a cult. They were clearly a cult because they were praying, and they were small, and not many people were praying to a cow. Using His NASA supercomputer brain, He remembered a court case He had read about for use as a precedent. This cult would be useful. Using this cult, John Phoenix would be able to destroy His enemies in the farming industry, legally. You see, legally, every member of this cult was a cow. So, John Phoenix could tell the cult to do things without liability, because cows don't speak english, legally speaking. This was because of the cults religious beliefs. they believed that they should all be cows. This was why they had fought to be legally recognized as cows. Cows were a very special animal, according to the cult, because they made milk, and they were cows. this made cows special. Since they were special, they should be free. So, John Phoenix told the cows about how His farm which He only owned part of had cows and told them how to get into it. They would not be breaking the law because they were legally considered cows, because they had fought very hard to qualify as cows in the eyes of the law. John Phoenix was also not breaking the law. Because nobody was breaking the law, this was all legal, so John Phoenix was in the right. Soon the cows were ready and they stormed into the farm and freed all the cows, because the cows in the farm were non-human cows and deserved freedom. John Phoenix then blew the cows cover, leading to a long battle between the cows and the farmers who were not John Phoenix, until eventually the farmers were out of money, and some of the cows were dead. but this was okay, because it was legal to kill cows if nobody owned them, because cows were just animals. Now everyone who owned part of this farm was in debt, except for John Phoenix, so He bought the rest of the farm from them, and now John Phoenix had an entire farm. Using the revenue from His farm, which was a lot, because food was in high demand, because people needed food to live, because otherwise they would starve, John Phoenix bought Himself armor that was like Sky Highs, but more indestructible. He also bought more mercenaries. John Phoenix made sure to use the same posters for recruitment as He had last round, so the Mercenaries did not know John Phoenix's Mercenaries had a high death rate, so they did not charge any more money than last time.
The Godmodder sees an opportunity to be very evil. So, naturally, he takes it, creating a Post-Post-Post Post-Post Post-Post Post-Poster Post, which he lobs through the etrahedral one.
...
This doesn't seem to do much of anything.
[A-megamaths] Sky High 483/753 HP, 52A, -40 to incoming damage, 3.1 Player Actions/round, 65 Regen. 1/1 Mana.
[A-megamaths] Leader 359/349 HP, 47A, 4.1 Player Actions/Round, -20 to incoming damage. 13 Regen. Greater Hollowing. Least Splintering. Lesser Blazing Blood. Lightly Spoiled.
[-Nedben] The F 230/230 HP, 6 Regen, -5 To incoming damage, 0.6 Generic Action Capability, 0.1 Shaping💍. 38 Gossamer, +1/Essence/Round. 1 Essence. Solid Frost! in the BRRRRRRRanded One's Basement! Assumption of Air shape (7 G: see P152). Forging the Ring Grace (1E, 1G:see P152). Ordinary Object Conjuration (1+ G: See P153.)
Equipped: Regal Tiara (+19 MHP, +0.01 Generic Action Capability, +10% loot. The F's Ring Grace)
[-Nedben] Basement Tinworks: 35 HP, completely nullifies external psychic assault! Tracks the Economy.
[-Nedben] little economy robots 2x20 HP, 1x20 Economy
Cat [Ruth-A][4.5]: HP 227/275, Attack 30, Stage Magic 5
[OG-Lyricsdusk] Darkness given Form 424/1002 HP 435A, blades of abyss,lightless onslaught. Darkness Given Soul ✦✦✦✦✦✦✦✦ SP, and something crawled out, but a hateful mirror. Darkness with purpose.••••••••••. heritage of the black star and the reign of none.
[OG-naturewriter] Cosmic Monolith 46/100 HP 75% dodge chance. Dark Pulse(65) Antimatter(25x3) Flash (?) 4/4 Doomsday.
[AG] etrahedral one : Sealed. Glass Side.
[AG] Military Dames 3x9+2 AP, null attack!A, Guarding Snowball.
[AG] Sovereign nglish, a highly reputable nglishman in possession of Ninety Six out of Number Health. 1x10 dodge Points. Sovereign nglishes Abstract Representation of Collected Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Pronouns, and other linguistic paraphernalia is currently: containing, Strain,,,SCHMING, stat, soteric. Regarding his manipulations of the collected paraphernalia, he possesses the following quantity of Degrees of reasonableness: Eight, though this is slowly increasing at a linear rate.
[AG] A Really Big Tree 1252 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix to a limited degree!
[AG] John Phoenix's Mercenaries 15x14+6x1 HP, 2x15A
[GIoPC] The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE 181/430 HP, -32 to Incoming Damage, 5% dodge, -30 HP if not full mana. Eishalon Masked! Cool Staff Bro! 20/20 Mana(2R)! goes BRRRRRRR and E! 82$. 2SP energy. Minor Void Blood. Hat of Hats - 4 (x2 per Hat tip!). Earmuffs of Sound Immunity! Cult! has a custom M16.
[GIoPC] Which House 74/194 HP, guarding BRRRRRRRanded One! Co-owned by Nedben! Summons 1 Cultist per round!
[GIoPC] Cultists 5x1 HP
[GIoPC] GLock Robster, 1 Glock, 31 Rocks 13 Snow, collects 2 Rocks, 0.5 Snow/round
[GM] Godmodder: 258 /300 HP 6/6 Demon Who Hunts. 5/100 Self-Actualisation II 4/4 Empirically Infallible Insurance 12/10 Self-Actualisation I 4/2 Noonday Sky 5/5 Give me a Sign! 3/3 if it weighs... the same.. as a duck... Holding 11 HP, 52.68CP stats.
The
(Signed photo of Waluigi! Box of Thymemicrophoneamen. has a Safe. full of stuff. and a spike-bush.)
Woobydoobydoo: Hella Dosh! Kneecap (+1 Style point! +2ish Attack!). Light Wounds. Founding Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! The Brand shines.
Darkside(Alastair Dragovich): Rock Snake Corpse (59 rocks), probably hopelessly confused. went on a sidequest in a
vainattempt to become, perhaps, slightly less confused; ended up in a game of monopoly, making them more confused.Megamaths: Light Wounds!
Thalai: Proud member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! Truly Ludicrous Supply Of partially-enchanted Kitchen Knives. Water solidification. Cup of ManaTTTTTTT on a T on a T with ttt's. Opposition: Godmodder. 8 Soul Points.
Nedben: in possession of a preceding reputation. Fast. has a Solar-Powered Telephonesis Phone, 11 Spruce Wood, 1 bunch of Iceberries. 30-HP shield: Mental Influence Negation!
TinyTimCanpy: is sort of Anti Hyphen Taxman. Is alive! 80 HP Shield!
Ad
John Phoenix █████: Moderate Wounds. Poisoned intensely(unaffected?). Speak of the Devil. The ventures of John Phoenix. ███████. Mitigated Geas of Mundanity: will almost-exclusively use mundane or psychic flavor. Lawyer(Decent I Guess), Psychic Missiles, Custom 9mm Mac-10's. Wearing Armor!
Alright, let's try this again from the top.
200.3/300
Looks like for the time being we can go back to just charging. Although Sky High does have that Mana point. Which raises the question...
What happens when you combine stage magic with real magic?
Entity Orders:
First, Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees regenerate (if possible).
Then, Sky High enchants Mister Mistoffelees' hat! Mister Mistoffelees reaches in... and pulls out a certain lawyer. He can't be bodyguarded by the tree from here! Sky High, Leader, and Mister Mistoffelees beat his face in.
A1: Ah, there's a shortage of potions? Well, we'll just have to figure out the supply chain for that. But while we're by the house, workshopping. I upgrade the Which House to add on kitchens, setting up appropriate preparation and storage areas so we can work on the food side. This should help with baking and brewing operations locally in the event of further buyouts.
A2: As significant farming has been bought out by an adversary who naming is not advisable, I invest in a sustainable fishery operation on the side.
A3: I sorcerously genetically engineer plants that produce relevant potion supplies (basically a more adaptive Omni Plant that comes preloaded with the information to synthesize certain common products if nobody's provided them with what constitutes 'relevant' to copy, so it can produce whatever basic goods like ordinary foodstuffs if not otherwise tasked) and garden them by the Which House kitchen for on-site production.
-
The F continues monitoring, paying particular attention to the possible shakeup in the food markets due to consolidated expert management and whether our recent support is likely at scale enough to matter.
The little economy robots get various jobs based on what openings they're capable of filling at their stature. A group of prospectors breaks off to identify the exposed gold and its potential value: is gold even relevant around here or would it be better off processed into orichalcum?
"GOD"
"DAMN IT"
A guy falls from the sky and spontaneously disassembles into a pile of code bits. All these pixellated code bits spray on the Godmodder, and it must be known that pixels are /sharp/!
A1: In the Which House I create a gunjuration portal that allows me to access the worlds inside bullets...including souls of bullets inside other bullets!
A2: I use necromancy and the gunjuration portal so I can set up a method to gain access to the evil ghosts and evil people (and the bullets inside bullets, for good measure), possibly by cheesing what qualifies as inside or outside bullets.
A3: Negotiating with the evil terrorists (and bullets), I work out an arrangement where I can summon them as terror operations to commit terrorism. I'm not sure what I can use evil ghosts and such for right now but we can figure out ghost-operable weapons later once we discuss the ghosts' (and bullets') capabilities.
-
The F feels sorry for the GLock Robster and decides to....start making Glock parts? The parts might actually put together and make a whole Glock depending on object ordinariness. I'm not really sure how much gossamer that's going to take but the F can figure it out as they try I guess.
The little economy robots keep manning the economy, with the prospector squad attempting to mine some gold from that gold vein over there.
A1: The guy gets up, brushes himself off, and jumps into a nearby car. He then proceeds to crash... into the stock market. The stocks take a nosedive (due to the guy attempting to activate the car's Plane Mode), rendering John Phoenix's riches completely worthless.
A2: The guy takes out his trusty McZepp Enterprises Match Youth Proceed, the pinnacle of console entertainment, and begins building a couple of four-to-eight second "puny-games". (Charge start, I guess? 1/?)
A3: The guy, who is me let's stop kidding around, wears the Godmodder as a hat. I then turn over an hourglass, plunging myself into the Underbattlefield for my hubris. Why did I think I could wield the inexorable power of time??? The world will never know.
You gain access to the worlds inside of bullets inside bullets! But removing the souls from bullets inside bullets was impossible. No one could free someone from an angel bullet, not even G*D. Your necromantic magic fails to extract them.
You crash the stock market!... But almost all of John Phoenix's wealth is by owning and directly managing corporations with genuine value, such as farms. Even with the stock market in a nosedive, He can continue to sell products for an almost untouched stream of profit!
- Purity embodied. Honorary Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club!
You begin developing various mini-games! +0.3 Charge Progress from the pun!
You then wear the Godmodder and attempt to trap him in the underbattlefield! success!... wait, why isn't this Godmodder moving? You suddenly realize this is not the Godmodder, but a Godmodder-shaped hat! blast! You are now in the Underbattlefield! It looks a lot like a cave system.
Sky High and Leader idle and regen.
The F creates a Glock using 1 Gossamer! The Economy Robots obtain 4 more units of grain and 1 unit of Gold!
the Cat auto-attacks the Mercenaries, killing 2 of them!
The Darkness is Training. It goes well! +16 attack, and +45 HP!
Sovereign nglish idles.
John Phoenix's Mercenaries hit the Cat with their swords and their spears and their daggers and their bows and their arrows and their weapons and their limbs again and again until eventually they hit the Cat so much and move their limbs so often they get tired and stop, dealing 60 damage! The emotional impact of seeing the Cat hurt by John Phoenix's Mercanaries deals 3 damage to Sky High and 4 to Leader!
The BANG RRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE decides to target The Godmodder! They do this using the Custom M16 they stole from John Phoenix! Its bullets are faster than most other bullets, so they fired before The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE pulled the trigger! But The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE didn't know how much faster, because unlike John Phoenix, The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE had never used John Phoenix's custom M16, which worked differently from normal M16s, because it had been made just for John Phoenix, and was customised to be better for John Phoenix and not anyone else, so instead of the bullet going to hit the Godmodder, The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE accidentally shot themself in the foot for 40 damage, like the idiot they, as a person who opposed John Phoenix, surely were. John Phoenix did not snort at this, however. John Phoenix was busy. John Phoenix was busy because He was doing important things. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE then did many other hilarious and incompetent things, but they were so nonsensical that trying to describe it would be pointless, so let's see what John Phoenix is up to instead.
John Phoenix was running his businesses. This was a task which required his utmost concentration, because it was a tumultuous time. It was a tumultuous time because the stock market was going down very quickly. The stock market continued to go down quickly. John Phoenix was not bothered by this, however. John Phoenix knew how to take advantage of anything, even the stock market going down very quickly, which it was doing because it was crashing. John Phoenix knew what a short was. It was a good way to make money off the stock market going down very quickly. But John Phoenix had not expected the stock market to begin crashing, so he did not sell any shorts. the reason he did not expect it to begin crashing was because it should not be crashing. But it was crashing anyway. This was very puzzling, but not for John Phoenix. John Phoenix was very smart. He had a high IQ. This IQ was many times higher than his uncle, Phoenix Wright, who he had surpassed since he was a baby in all factors except height, and surpassed in height some time ago. It was also many times higher than the IQ of everyone else involved in the economy. So despite that the stock market should not be crashing, John Phoenix was not puzzled by its crashing. This was because John Phoenix had a good memory. He also had precise information. Because of this, he knew that the stock market had started crashing when 'The guy' had crashed into the Stock Market. This meant he knew why the stock market was crashing, because he was able to make connections between events. This was why John Phoenix was not puzzled by the crashing stock market. In fact, this was a good opportunity. John Phoenix could use his riches to purchase additional stocks in other companies. When the stock market finished crashing, this would make him much richer. John Phoenix considered this plan and concluded it was a good plan. But it was not a perfect plan. That was okay, however, because there was no such thing as a perfect plan. There was no such thing as a perfect plan because things could go wrong. this was why John Phoenix's plan of buying stocks was not perfect. However, John Phoenix would be able to skillfully decide when to buy stocks, allowing him to turn it into a perfect plan by making things go right. this was why John Phoenix was so rich, because he always made things go right. Using some of his other money, John Phoenix lobbied for it to be illegal for the dead to testify in court. He had a very good argument. his argument was that "the dead can't be trusted! Dead people are dead, so they are either in hell or heaven, and everyone in heaven is busy praying to G*D. so all the dead people we see are from hell, which people go to when they are evil and terrorists, unlike heaven, which has no terrorists.". and he was right. He was right because he knew a lot about heaven and hell, because he had been to heaven court, because he had needed to avoid the plot of John Dragon, which was on earth. He also had other reasons which were also good. John Phoenix also got a potion for himself and drank it, so he was now containing only Major wounds. This was free because he owned a potion brewery now, because he had bought a controlling share from the nosediving stock market. He had bought these stocks even though the market was still nosediving, because he wanted the brewery, not just the stocks. This showed that sometimes even smart people who could outperform the stock market would make choices which would temporarily lead to them having lower value stocks.
John Phoenix was then done his turn. Earlier, however, when the BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE was doing things, other people had also been doing things. also, other things had been happening. things had occurred. here are those things.
The Which House summons a Cultist! One Cultist mans the farm and plant, producing 1 Potion supply, trout meat, and trout oil! a second cultist uses 2 Barley Grain and 2 Trout Oil to make a health potion! It can heal 8 HP! The GLock Robster steals the Glock made by The F, gaining 1 Glock! It's extremely happy about this turn of events.
The Godmodder stealthily changes two details in the battlefield! If not detected (as a free action), the changes will become permanent!
[A-megamaths] Sky High 570/753 HP, 52A, adds 40 to incoming damage, 3.1 Player Actions/round, 65 Regen. 1/1 Mana.
[A-megamaths] Leader 355/369 HP, 47A, 4.1 Player Actions/Round, -20 to incoming damage. 13 Regen. Greater Hollowing. Least Splintering. Lesser Blazing Blood. Lightly Spoiled.
[-Nedben] The F 242/242 HP, 6 Regen, -5 To incoming damage, 0.6 Generic Action Capability, 0.1 Shaping💍. 39 Gossamer, +1/Essence/Round. 1 Essence. Solid Frost! in the BRRRRRRRanded One's Basement! Assumption of Air shape (7 G: see P152). Forging the Ring Grace (1E, 1G:see P152). Ordinary Object Conjuration (1+ G: See P153.)
Not Equipped: Regal Tiara (+19 MHP, +0.01 Generic Action Capability, +10% loot. The F's Ring Grace)
[-Nedben] Basement Tinworks: 35 HP, completely nullifies external psychic assault! Tracks the Economy.
[-Nedben] little economy robots 2x20 HP, 1x20 Economy
Cat [Ruth-A][4.5]: HP 132/275, Attack 30, Stage Magic 5
[OG-Lyricsdusk] Darkness given Form 475/1053 HP 453A, blades of abyss,lightless onslaught. Darkness Given Soul ✦✦✦✦✦✦✦✦ SP, and something crawled out, but a hateful mirror. Darkness with purpose.••••••••••. heritage of the black star and the reign of none.
[OG-naturewriter] Cosmic Monolith 46/100 HP 75% dodge chance. Dark Pulse(65) Antimatter(25x3) Flash (?) 4/4 Doomsday.
[AG] etrahedral one : Sealed. Glass Side.
[AG] Sovereign nglish, a highly reputable nglishman in possession of Ninety Six out of Number Health. 1x10 dodge Points. Sovereign nglishes Abstract Representation of Collected Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Pronouns, and other linguistic paraphernalia is currently: Strain,,,SCHMING, stat, soteric. Regarding his manipulations of the collected paraphernalia, he possesses the following quantity of Degrees of reasonableness: Nine, though this is slowly increasing at a linear rate.
[AG] A Really Big Tree 1252 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix to a limited degree!
[AG] John Phoenix's Mercenaries 15x24+6x1 HP, 2x25A
[GIoPC] The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE 141/430 HP, -32 to Incoming Damage, 5% dodge, -30 HP if not full mana. Eishalon Masked! Cool Staff Bro! 20/20 Mana(2R)! goes BRRRRRRR and E! 82$. 2SP energy. Minor Void Blood. Hat of Hats - 4 (x2 per Hat tip!). Earmuffs of Sound Immunity! Cult! has a custom M16.
[GIoPC] Which House 74/194 HP, guarding BRRRRRRRanded One! Co-owned by Nedben! Summons 1 Cultist per round! Produces 1 Potion Supply, Trout Meat, and Trout Oil per round! Cooking/Brewing Station. Stored: 2 Potion supply, 2 Trout Meat, 0 Trout Oil, 6 Barley Grains, 1 Gold, 1 Potion.
[GIoPC] Cultists 5x3 HP
[GIoPC] GLock Robster, 2 Glock, 35 Rocks 14 Snow, collects 2 Rocks, 0.5 Snow/round
[GM] Godmodder: 258 /300 HP 1/? Fake Evidence 6/6 Demon Who Hunts. 5/100 Self-Actualisation II 4/4 Empirically Infallible Insurance 12/10 Self-Actualisation I 4/2 Noonday Sky 5/5 Give me a Sign! 3/3 if it weighs... the same.. as a duck... Holding 11 HP, 52.68CP stats.
The
(Signed photo of Waluigi! Box of Thymemicrophoneamen. has a Safe. full of stuff. and a spike-bush.)
Woobydoobydoo: Hella Dosh! Kneecap (+1 Style point! +2ish Attack!). Light Wounds. Founding Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! The Brand shines.
Darkside(Alastair Dragovich): Rock Snake Corpse (59 rocks), probably hopelessly confused. went on a sidequest in a
vainattempt to become, perhaps, slightly less confused; ended up in a game of monopoly, making them more confused.Megamaths: Light Wounds!
Thalai: Proud member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! Truly Ludicrous Supply Of partially-enchanted Kitchen Knives. Water solidification. Cup of ManaTTTTTTT on a T on a T with ttt's. Opposition: Godmodder. 8 Soul Points.
Nedben: in possession of a preceding reputation. Fast. has a Solar-Powered Telephonesis Phone, 11 Spruce Wood, 1 bunch of Iceberries. 30-HP shield: Mental Influence Negation!
TinyTimCanpy: is sort of Anti Hyphen Taxman. Is alive! 80 HP Shield!
KingFuffy: in the underbattlefield!
Ad
John Phoenix █████: containing Major Wounds. Poisoned intensely(unaffected?). Speak of the Devil. The ventures of John Phoenix. ███████. Mitigated Geas of Mundanity: will almost-exclusively use mundane or psychic flavor. Lawyer(Decent I Guess), Psychic Missiles, Custom 9mm Mac-10's.
Free: The F already-equips its Regal Tiara, that Not Equipped is incorrect.
Also free: Sky High should subtract 40 incoming damage, not add it.
A1+A2+A3: I combine the power to make the impossible possible with the power of No One. By the armament of Da Vinci I am become Pioneer of the Stars. By the power of Odysseus I obtain the power to be 'No One, not even G*D' to wield that truth as written as one who could. And with this I will surpass the foul curses laid by the edges of possibility. I will again grant liberation to the sealed.
If this is not enough, I will begin the journey toward more with this. Inventors, sailors, whatever it takes, I have a new thing to obsess over.
-
The F uses the computer and that Ad in the battlefield to design some advertisements.
The little economy robots continue participating in the economy.
A1: I explore the Underbattlefield and try to pick up some cool rocks.
A2: I build more microgamez. (2/?)
A3: Now's my chance to be a big shot. I stab myself with a giant syringe, boosting my capabilities slightly.
207.4/300
3.1 - Sky High activates his wings, flies high into the air, and dives at absurdly high speeds! He divebombs a certain lawyer and thrusts his spear!
But he doesn't hit the lawyer. He hits juuuuust to the lawyer's right. But what effect does this have?
Simple! juuuuuuust to the lawyer's right is the word "Containing." It's now forcefully dislodged from the lawyer's stat block!
(All other actions charge.)
Entity orders: Mister Mistoffelees and Sky High combine their magic to distract the tree that's bodyguarding the lawyer. Then, both of them and Leader attack the lawyer.
Leader and Sky High regenerate HP. Sky High fixes the DR in his statblock - it should reduce, not add.
You successfully catch, and neutralise, both of the Godmodder's modifications!
No One, not even G*D saves the souls from the bullet in the bullet in the bullet! 8 Evil Terrorist Farmers summoned! 4 Evil Ghosts summoned! The Evil Terrorist Farmers have the power to be evil terrorists, and also to farm things! The Evil Ghosts have the power to be a nuisance!
As an aside, it seems like I've not been clear on this, so I'll restate it - The F's shaping action is a bonus action. they can both perform shaping and do their normal action, in the same turn.
You explore the Underbattlefield! the cave runs into what looks to be an underground ruin of some kind. there's also a branch that forks upwards, which seems to be just more tunnel. you find 4 pieces of worn memorabilia for something unidentified; they seem to be carved out of granite. you also find 3 green crystals shaped roughly like rupees.
You continue to build your microgames! you got +0.3 charge progress last round, so you're at 2.3, not 2.
You stab yourself with a giant syringe! until you next take damage, your base action power is increased by 1 point!
You charge!
- Purity embodied. Honorary Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club!
.
The lawyer in question is no longer Containing their major wounds! they are now majorly wounded again, reducing their action power substantially!
Sky High's DR was already fixed by Nedben! he receives 1 additional DR for his troubles.
Mistoffelees tries to distract the Really Big Tree! [1d20:3] ...this goes poorly, seeing as it is... a tree. not very distractable things, trees. Mistoffelees, Sky High, and Leader then attack the lawyer! A Really Big Tree blocks Sky High and Leader, but Mistoffelees gets through, reducing their target to Critical Wounds! the other two deal 99 damage to A Really Big Tree, and regenerate.
The F designs some advertisements! What are you advertising, to be clear? I mean, I'm sure these are good advertisements, but what are they for?
The Economy Robots produce 4 more Barley Grains and 1 more Gold!
(The existence of the Evil Terrorist Farmers leads to a change to the numbering of Economy for future math ease. This has not altered the actual value of the Economy Robots.)
The Darkness Is Training. It goes 'aight, +26 HP and +5 attack.
Sovereign nglish idles again.
John Phoenix's Mercenaries attack the Cat again, dealing 50 more damage. They also patch up the single injured mercenary for 9 health.
The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE decides to target... himself! yes, not even The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE is safe from the terrible scourge that is The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE's indiscriminate and completely random attacks! The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE wallops itself in the face and falls over from the force! 1 damage! Then they get up and do it again! 1 damage! with a mighty slam, it hits itself in the face with its Staff, producing an explosion of elemental damage for 3 damage! phew, now, that sure was tiring. The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE goes to sleep and has a nap, healing itself for 5 health.
The Which House summons another cultist! one cultist harvests the plant and fish! another cultist uses 2 trout meat and 2 barley grain to make a Snack. it heals for 4 HP per round for 3 rounds. the third cultist idles.
The GLock Robster polishes its Glocks happily.
John Phoenix is Critically wounded, but that doesn't completely remove his ability to increase his wealth through skillful business decisions. Nor does it ensure his demise; the wounds aren't mortal wounds. John Phoenix knows his survival, as the greatest defence attorney to ever live, is worth any amount of money, because John Phoenix is smart enough to know the difference between true and false modesty and knows just how good he is. John Phoenix looked down from his perch on A Very Big Tree, even as honestly quite impressive quantities of blackish-purple blood poured out of his wounds, and spent a lot of money, which was enough money to buy many things. John Phoenix grew more determined as he spent this money. He was determined because he had reason to be determined, because to survive he had to be determined, because determined sounded like de-termined, which was sort of like saying undead, something John Phoenix might have to become to survive. But, owing to his Critical wounds, John Phoenix was not able to make nearly as good of a deal as he normally made, and ended up becoming much less wealthy, and only managed to buy 8 Mercenary Meatshields. Still, John Phoenix knew he was going to survive. but he was, of course, wrong.
The Godmodder picks up the little Economy Robots, rolls them all into a ball, set it on fire, and throws it through the ground at The F! The Economy Ball then explodes, dealing 190 damage to The F and completely wrecking the Tinworks! If he can't dominate his foes, he'll just kill them! Hmph!
[A-megamaths] Sky High 635/753 HP, 52A, -41 to incoming damage, 3.1 Player Actions/round, 65 Regen. 1/1 Mana.
[A-megamaths] Leader 365/369 HP, 47A, 4.1 Player Actions/Round, -20 to incoming damage. 13 Regen. Greater Hollowing. Least Splintering. Lesser Blazing Blood. Lightly Spoiled.
[-Nedben] The F 58/248 HP, 6 Regen, -5 To incoming damage, 0.6 Generic Action Capability, 0.1 Shaping💍. 40 Gossamer, +1/Essence/Round. 1 Essence. Solid Frost! in the BRRRRRRRanded One's Basement! Assumption of Air shape (7 G: see P152). Forging the Ring Grace (1E, 1G:see P152). Ordinary Object Conjuration (1+ G: See P153.)
Equipped: Regal Tiara (+19 MHP, +0.01 Generic Action Capability, +10% loot. The F's Ring Grace)
[-Nedben] Basement Tinworks: 0 HP, completely nullifies external psychic assault! Tracks the Economy.
[-Nedben] little economy robots 2x0 HP, 0.25x0 Economy
[-Nedben] Evil Terrorist Farmers 5x8 HP, 1x8 Farmerly Terrorism
[-Nedben] Evil Ghosts 2x4 HP, 50% dodge, 1x4 Nuisance!A
Cat [Ruth-A][4.5]: HP 82/275, Attack 30, Stage Magic 5
[OG-Lyricsdusk] Darkness given Form 501/1079 HP 458A, blades of abyss,lightless onslaught. Darkness Given Soul ✦✦✦✦✦✦✦✦ SP, and something crawled out, but a hateful mirror. Darkness with purpose.••••••••••. heritage of the black star and the reign of none.
[OG-naturewriter] Cosmic Monolith 46/100 HP 75% dodge chance. Dark Pulse(65) Antimatter(25x3) Flash (?) 4/4 Doomsday.
[AG] etrahedral one : Sealed. Glass Side.
[AG] Sovereign nglish, a highly reputable nglishman in possession of Ninety Six out of Number Health. 1x10 dodge Points. Sovereign nglishes Abstract Representation of Collected Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Pronouns, and other linguistic paraphernalia is currently: Strain,,,SCHMING, stat, soteric. Regarding his manipulations of the collected paraphernalia, he possesses the following quantity of Degrees of reasonableness: Ten, though this is slowly increasing at a linear rate.
[AG] A Really Big Tree 1153 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix to a limited degree!
[AG] John Phoenix's Mercenaries 15x25 HP, 2x25A
[AG] John Phoenix's Meatshields 15x8 HP, Bodyguarding John Phoenix.
[GIoPC] The BRRRRRRanded OnEEEEEEEEE 141/430 HP, -32 to Incoming Damage, 5% dodge, -30 HP if not full mana. Eishalon Masked! Cool Staff Bro! 20/20 Mana(2R)! goes BRRRRRRR and E! 82$. 2SP energy. Minor Void Blood. Hat of Hats - 32 (x2 per Hat tip!). Earmuffs of Sound Immunity! Cult! has a custom M16.
[GIoPC] Which House 74/194 HP, guarding BRRRRRRRanded One! Co-owned by Nedben! Summons 1 Cultist per round! Produces 1 Potion Supply, Trout Meat, and Trout Oil per round! Cooking/Brewing Station. Stored: 3 Potion supply, 1 Trout Meat, 1 Trout Oil, 8 Barley Grains, 2 Gold, 1 Potion, 1 Snack.
[GIoPC] Cultists 5x4 HP
[GIoPC] GLock Robster, 2 Glock, 37 Rocks 14.5 Snow, collects 2 Rocks, 0.5 Snow/round
[GM] Godmodder: 258 /300 HP 1/? Fake Evidence 6/6 Demon Who Hunts. 5/100 Self-Actualisation II 4/4 Empirically Infallible Insurance 12/10 Self-Actualisation I 4/2 Noonday Sky 5/5 Give me a Sign! 3/3 if it weighs... the same.. as a duck... Holding 11 HP, 52.68CP stats.
The
(Signed photo of Waluigi! Box of Thymemicrophoneamen. has a Safe. full of stuff. and a spike-bush.)
Woobydoobydoo: Hella Dosh! Kneecap (+1 Style point! +2ish Attack!). Light Wounds. Founding Member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! The Brand shines.
Darkside(Alastair Dragovich): Rock Snake Corpse (59 rocks), probably hopelessly confused. went on a sidequest in a
vainattempt to become, perhaps, slightly less confused; ended up in a game of monopoly, making them more confused.Megamaths: Light Wounds!
Thalai: Proud member of the Going Insane On Purpose Club! Truly Ludicrous Supply Of partially-enchanted Kitchen Knives. Water solidification. Cup of ManaTTTTTTT on a T on a T with ttt's. Opposition: Godmodder. 8 Soul Points.
Nedben: in possession of a preceding reputation. Fast. has a Solar-Powered Telephonesis Phone, 11 Spruce Wood, 1 bunch of Iceberries. 30-HP shield: Mental Influence Negation!
TinyTimCanpy: is sort of Anti Hyphen Taxman. Is alive! 80 HP Shield!
KingFuffy: in the underbattlefield! 4 Granite Memorabilia, 3
John Phoenix █████: Critical Wounds. Poisoned intensely(unaffected?). Speak of the Devil. The depleted ventures of John Phoenix. ███████. Mitigated Geas of Mundanity: will almost-exclusively use mundane or psychic flavor. Lawyer(Decent I Guess), Psychic Missiles, Custom 9mm Mac-10's.
Containing
A1: Glaring daggers at your enemies is overdone, so I glare lens flare at the Godmodder instead. They are beset by shiny. The resulting lighting is overly bright and distracting, but transient.
A2: Seeing the wide variety of injuries on display, this wartime economy could really use better medical healthcare. I set up an infirmary in the Which House because we probably need somewhere to treat our allies.
A3: Using the powers of rapid wood-aspect reconstruction, I acquire healing herbs and make a poultice for the F, applying it because that sounds like something healing-y I can do.
-
The F uses its regular action to further recover from explosion trauma by stabilizing and resupplying the ice making up its primary Assumption.
Shapingwise, it spins the tale of a space for recovery where principles tend toward reconstruction and maintenance, improving the effectiveness of the infirmary for this round because it really does need to focus on healing. The F also reveals the ads were for... this house! It's for the cult apparently.
The evil terrorist farmers man the farming operation, which is mostly sorting the food and potion supplies and tending the omni plants.
The evil ghosts annoy Sovereign nglish because why not I guess.
210.5/300
4.1 (+1 Mana) - Leader notices Mister Mistoffelees is in danger! This simply won't do, so Leader and Sky High use Sky High's Mana to conjure up a Magical Medkit, which they smash over Mister Mistoffelees's head. Now, if you smashed a regular medkit over a regular cat's head, it would hurt. But this is a Magical Medkit and a Magical Cat. So instead it heals. A lot.
3 - Want to do something right? ....Gotta do it yourself.
I temporarily borrow T's action power, which is really just mine. Suddenly, my massive hand reaches through the Fourth Wall and squeezes... a certain lawyer... to death!
Remaining actions used to charge.
Leader and Sky High regenerate. Leader and Sky High attack the lawyer who shall remain nameless, unless he's already dead. In that case they do not attack at all.
A1: I pick up some more rocks, focusing on those shiny crystals........
...why do I want these...?
...
...
...
!
FLASHBACK
NEO CARAMELISEATTLE
The streets bustle with people. It is a lovely day, and your name is KEANE MCZUPP.
As you walk peacefully down the NEO CARAMELISEATTLE STREET, something catches your eye in a shop window... a DELICIOUS CARAMEL APPLE.
You salivate over the CARAMEL APPLE for several minutes, before checking the price-tag...
KEANE MCZUPP: ONE TRILLION ECONOMY???????
This will not STAND! You call up your FLOATSHIP, hop in, and BLAST OFF to another planet to gather the currency you need for that DELICIOUS CARAMEL APPLE, one step at a time!
END FLASHBACK
A2: I build more microgames, this time including one where you break a window and steal a candy apple, and another one where you sell John Phoenix faulty mercenaries. (3.3/?)
A3: I continue walking along, heading to that underground ruin! Ruins and temples ALWAYS carry magical artifacts that can be easily incorporated into microgame collections according to the first law of- well, not always, but most of the time. Probably shouldn't mention the name of the first law in case it invokes some sort of encounter.
INVENTORY:
4 Granite Memorabilia
3
A1: I pick up one of the skeletons lying around and set up a revitalization system to have blood production in it or something. This produces extra blood for the blood sacrifices, because we don't want to run out of blood to sacrifice before we've even exsanguinated the cult or whatever.
A2: I bake the Godmodder into a pie. They are now in a pie tray, surrounded by pie filling and topped with a pie crust. Why? Why not.
A3: I ask the Darkness given Form what it's doing and why it's here, because I am distracted by battle and not reading the backlog.
-
The F decides to start writing cult scripture and exegesis or something because publishing what this is even a cult about would probably be useful. I guess it's time to become a novelist? Spend gossamer for miscellaneous writing supplies as appropriate.
Shapingwise it spins the story of 'atmosphere conducive to writing', making the place suitable for putting pen to paper and words to word processing software should anyone see fit to join them in publication.
The other entities continue their jobs I guess.
A1: I float over the side of the balcony and down to the altar, checking it for artifacts or items.
A2: I push a button on my FLOATSHIP. (Which is a small hover-chair that is normally capable of interstellar travel, but right now that feature is broken.) The RESOURCE-MAGNET activates, drawing minuscule bits of relevant material towards me.
A3: I take the 0.6 Charge Progress and use it to charge my Match Youth Proceed. AKA I add it to the charge. (4.9/?)
4 Granite Memorabilia
25
210.5/300
10.2: Sky High and Leader decide Mister Mistoffelees is in too much danger. So they give him 10 charge-worth of HP regen and 0.2 charge-worth of Stage Magic.
Sky High bodyguards Mister Misoffelees. All entities regenerate. They also only attack if attacked.