Happened recently: Random criminal tries to charm our friend, fails, and runs away. We just mercillesly beat him to death, giving him FOUR levels of exhaustion and still not killing him until randomly he becomes a skeleton because of some random god hand and then one of my party members kicked his skull off, killing him.
But did any of you say "stop, criminal scum"?
No we literally just wacked him to death.
Tell your party a random internet stranger is proud of them.
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- With all due respects, your friendly neighbourhood alchemist
Happened recently: Random criminal tries to charm our friend, fails, and runs away. We just mercillesly beat him to death, giving him FOUR levels of exhaustion and still not killing him until randomly he becomes a skeleton because of some random god hand and then one of my party members kicked his skull off, killing him.
But did any of you say "stop, criminal scum"?
No we literally just wacked him to death.
Tell your party a random internet stranger is proud of them.
LOL
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I am part of the Cult of Grammar. Respect us. Or we will find the slightest mistake in your grammar, and never let you forget it. Clones would have saved Star Wars, and Kylo Ren sucks. MAKE THE EMPIRE GREAT AGAIN!!! I am a stormtrooper, and the Skywalker family is made of nothing but idiots who are insane. Cough Anakin and Luke Skywalker Cough
Happened recently: Random criminal tries to charm our friend, fails, and runs away. We just mercillesly beat him to death, giving him FOUR levels of exhaustion and still not killing him until randomly he becomes a skeleton because of some random god hand and then one of my party members kicked his skull off, killing him.
But did any of you say "stop, criminal scum"?
No we literally just wacked him to death.
YOU SAY YOU ARE A PART OF THE GRAMMAR CULT BUT YOU DIDN'T EVEN SPELL "WHACKED" RIGHT LOL
Happened recently: Random criminal tries to charm our friend, fails, and runs away. We just mercillesly beat him to death, giving him FOUR levels of exhaustion and still not killing him until randomly he becomes a skeleton because of some random god hand and then one of my party members kicked his skull off, killing him.
But did any of you say "stop, criminal scum"?
No we literally just wacked him to death.
YOU SAY YOU ARE A PART OF THE GRAMMAR CULT BUT YOU DIDN'T EVEN SPELL "WHACKED" RIGHT LOL
Hey, everyone makes grammar mistakes sometimes. Also, your sentence doesn't have a period, so you're one to be talking.
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All stars fade. Some stars forever fall. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Homebrew (Mostly Outdated):Magic Items,Monsters,Spells,Subclasses ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
"Go right ahead. This is the 3rd adventure I've been on with you lot. I'm desensitized to pointless violence now."
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Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
bard ( casting thunderwave): everyone step back. bloodhunter: i step in front of mordrai to annoy him. bloodhunter as he almost dies from the 16 points of damage he took: ( sounds of extreme pain)
bard ( casting thunderwave): everyone step back. bloodhunter: i step in front of mordrai to annoy him. bloodhunter as he almost dies from the 16 points of damage he took: ( sounds of extreme pain)
bard ( casting thunderwave): everyone step back. bloodhunter: i step in front of mordrai to annoy him. bloodhunter as he almost dies from the 16 points of damage he took: ( sounds of extreme pain)
Okay, this one got me to snort, lmao
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- With all due respects, your friendly neighbourhood alchemist
NPC (DM): "Hi. I'm Jasper the Jailor. I've been part of the community for a long time. I'm the jailor like my father and his father before him and his father before him. We've been here forever and not just made up at the table."
(DM had rolled a die to see if the town had a jail.)
(Trivia: DM rolled the die to give himself one beat of time to decide if the town should have a jail. The roll didn't decide anything.)
Somewhere buried in this thread is the creation of Jasper.
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Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
GM: The dragon makes all of it's attacks on [Fighter] *rolls* <10 seconds of of silence> GM removes the screen and shows three 1-s Fighter: Wow. Now my payback time! <rolls three attacks, also three 1-s> Divination Wizard: I Swear to god it's not me.
GM: The dragon makes all of it's attacks on [Fighter] *rolls* <10 seconds of of silence> GM removes the screen and shows three 1-s Fighter: Wow. Now my payback time! <rolls three attacks, also three 1-s> Divination Wizard: I Swear to god it's not me.
That’s...that’s incredible.
And hilarious.
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Tell your party a random internet stranger is proud of them.
- With all due respects, your friendly neighbourhood alchemist
" WHY IS IT RAINING CHILDREN. "
Player walks over trap door with magic mouth cast on it and it says " WELCOME TO YOUR DEATH "
He says this to his freind after he skedaddles from the door.
" I think that trap door was a trap i mean its probbaly not it only told me it was my death "
KNIGHT OF RANDOM
Halike Morgad the Dhampir fist of arlo
Sir strange one of the centaurs
LOL
I am part of the Cult of Grammar. Respect us. Or we will find the slightest mistake in your grammar, and never let you forget it.
Clones would have saved Star Wars, and Kylo Ren sucks.
MAKE THE EMPIRE GREAT AGAIN!!! I am a stormtrooper, and the Skywalker family is made of nothing but idiots who are insane. Cough Anakin and Luke Skywalker Cough
Don't even TRY to argue with me about Star Wars.
"I want the crazy torch lady!"
"GOOOOOSE! GOOOOOOOSE!"
Chilling kinda vibe.
YOU SAY YOU ARE A PART OF THE GRAMMAR CULT BUT YOU DIDN'T EVEN SPELL "WHACKED" RIGHT LOL
Current Character: https://www.dndbeyond.com/profile/MajestorSteel1103/characters/44226318
Leader of the Cult of ANTI-Sedge
Priest of the Supreme Court of Sauce as well as one of the three founders (others being GreatAxeblade and ParticleHex)
Hey, everyone makes grammar mistakes sometimes. Also, your sentence doesn't have a period, so you're one to be talking.
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homebrew (Mostly Outdated): Magic Items, Monsters, Spells, Subclasses
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
"Both the snail and the half-elf are enraged"
"Go right ahead. This is the 3rd adventure I've been on with you lot. I'm desensitized to pointless violence now."
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
“Can I roll for a tavern?”
PC 1: “Remember last time we freed a ‘helpless’ prisoner?”
PC 2: “Yeah, we all do. I think you have hag PTSD.”
DM: “You hear the sound of giant spider mandibles. When you turn around, there’s nothing there.”
PC 1: “Ahh! Remember last time we heard disembodied sounds!?”
PC 2: “Yes, hags know minor illusion. And you DEFINITELY have PTSD.”
RIP Tavern.
All hail King Jovan Fluffycloud Prince
Teleporting elf monk supremacy!, but druids are better
[Cactus]Waffles!”I don’t have any good quotes to put in my sig.” -Me
"Can I give my armour to the mouse?"
"No, snails don't have feet!"
"Can I eat the fleshy rock?"
- With all due respects, your friendly neighbourhood alchemist
bard ( casting thunderwave): everyone step back. bloodhunter: i step in front of mordrai to annoy him. bloodhunter as he almost dies from the 16 points of damage he took: ( sounds of extreme pain)
these quotes are all so funny!
village of kobalds: we will give you many rewards if you help us kill the goblins.
my fellow players: lets kill them and take their treasure.
village of goblins: we will give you many rewards if you help us kill the kobalds.
my fellow players: lets kill them and take their treasure.
Okay, this one got me to snort, lmao
- With all due respects, your friendly neighbourhood alchemist
"I'm not /trying/ to kill you; you're all just dumb!" - A very exasperated DM
- With all due respects, your friendly neighbourhood alchemist
NPC (DM): "Hi. I'm Jasper the Jailor. I've been part of the community for a long time. I'm the jailor like my father and his father before him and his father before him. We've been here forever and not just made up at the table."
(DM had rolled a die to see if the town had a jail.)
(Trivia: DM rolled the die to give himself one beat of time to decide if the town should have a jail. The roll didn't decide anything.)
Somewhere buried in this thread is the creation of Jasper.
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
GM: The dragon makes all of it's attacks on [Fighter] *rolls*
<10 seconds of of silence>
GM removes the screen and shows three 1-s
Fighter: Wow. Now my payback time!
<rolls three attacks, also three 1-s>
Divination Wizard: I Swear to god it's not me.
That’s...that’s incredible.
And hilarious.