Re-enactment of an encounter: The players feel like they were duped by a Ranger into going in circles and returned to where they had round him. A different Ranger was present and started on the same spiel that the other ranger had said:
Ranger (DM): "This is Ranger's Guild territory. Only the most daring, the most charming, and the most--" Everyone: "SKIP!" Ranger: "These woods have been protected by--" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Ranger: "The dragon has been overhead--" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Ranger: "For three--" Rogue: "Oh, SKIP!" Ranger: "The Gods of Natu--" Artifice: "SKIP!" Ranger: "The wolves and the frogs--" Rogue+Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Ranger: "As long as these woods--" Rogue: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Rogue: "Skippity-SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SHUT-UP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Ranger: "Up your butts--" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Rogue: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Ranger: "You must speak this exact phrase--" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!.. SKIP!"
(They fall for another ruse, return to find yet a different Ranger, and immediately all yell, "SKIP!" before she even begins to speak.)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
In a heated battle, a player rolls his D20, picks it up and rolls it again. The DM asks, "what are you doing?", without missing a beat, player says, "I could not see it, does a 22 hit?"
Re-enactment of an encounter: The players feel like they were duped by a Ranger into going in circles and returned to where they had round him. A different Ranger was present and started on the same spiel that the other ranger had said:
Ranger (DM): "This is Ranger's Guild territory. Only the most daring, the most charming, and the most--" Everyone: "SKIP!" Ranger: "These woods have been protected by--" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Ranger: "The dragon has been overhead--" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Ranger: "For three--" Rogue: "Oh, SKIP!" Ranger: "The Gods of Natu--" Artifice: "SKIP!" Ranger: "The wolves and the frogs--" Rogue+Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Ranger: "As long as these woods--" Rogue: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Rogue: "Skippity-SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SHUT-UP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Ranger: "Up your butts--" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Rogue: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Ranger: "You must speak this exact phrase--" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!.. SKIP!"
(They fall for another ruse, return to find yet a different Ranger, and immediately all yell, "SKIP!" before she even begins to speak.)
"Bearer of the curse...SKIP!...seek...SKIP!...seek...SKIP!...lest...SKIP...!"
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
Some groups like to plan before an encounter all through the night and into the next morning. (Exaggerating, but only just.)
There's a DM who let's the players ramble off plans and then interrupts them if they're taking too long, kicking off the encounter - such as they're trying to come up with a cover story and the person they're trying to fool walks in while they're talking about the key points of the plan and hears what they're saying, ruining their plans.
Every time that happens, the Artificer shouts, "Aw, piss!"
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider. My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong. I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲 “It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Some groups like to plan before an encounter all through the night and into the next morning. (Exaggerating, but only just.)
There's a DM who let's the players ramble off plans and then interrupts them if they're taking too long, kicking off the encounter - such as they're trying to come up with a cover story and the person they're trying to fool walks in while they're talking about the key points of the plan and hears what they're saying, ruining their plans.
Every time that happens, the Artificer shouts, "Aw, piss!"
Druid: Don't you guys trust me? Sorcerer: Remember last session, when you spent 15 minutes trying to figure out if you were able to kill off the rest of the party in one round with thunderwave? Druid: That was me as a player, not me as a character. [Druid]'s alignment is Chaotic Good. My alignment is Chaotic Neutral. Now, what's your Constitution save, again?
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Homebrew (Mostly Outdated):Magic Items,Monsters,Spells,Subclasses ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
=========================== Laugh at life or life will laugh at you.
Current D&D Characters: Kromen Flintfist, Hill Dwarf Order of the Scribes Wizard/Armorer Artificer Eiphrok, Half-Orc Oath of Glory Paladin/Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer
Helper of Create a World thread/Sedge is Chaotic Neutral/ Mega Yahtzee High: 34, Low: 14/I speak English, je me parle le Francais, agus Labhraim beagan Gaeilge
This is cheating because it didn't happen during a D&D session, but I was talking about what happened during our recent session to one of my coworkers.
Co-Worker: Sounds like you had fun riding on the back of a yellow whale.
Me: Don't be ridiculous. There's no such thing as a yellow whale. That is completely unrealistic and unbelievable. The whale was whatever the natural color is for sperm whales. Instead, we were riding inside a magical, yellow, waterproof dome that was sitting on the back of a sentient whale. That's *much* more believable and realistic.
=========================== Laugh at life or life will laugh at you.
Current D&D Characters: Kromen Flintfist, Hill Dwarf Order of the Scribes Wizard/Armorer Artificer Eiphrok, Half-Orc Oath of Glory Paladin/Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer
This happened in the beginning of OOTA (out of the abyss)
My character sees orc in prison with us, names him orc in the corner
Me "Hey sup wanna be ffrriieennddss?"
Orc "No"
Me "how about if I break your chains with this iron bar?"
Orc grunts
I smite chains breaking them
Orc punches me in the face. "You're a weakling."
Since my race is minor deity, homebrew, one of my party members is my paladin, walks over, and one shots him with thunderous smite
Guards come running, ask whats happening.
Me "We're having a tea party" -rolls nat 20-
Guards, since were obviously not having a tea party, come into the cell a little confused, one stays in cell, others go to alert other guards, my bard friend charms the guard in the cell
This happened in the beginning of OOTA (out of the abyss)
My character sees orc in prison with us, names him orc in the corner
Me "Hey sup wanna be ffrriieennddss?"
Orc "No"
Me "how about if I break your chains with this iron bar?"
Orc grunts
I smite chains breaking them
Orc punches me in the face. "You're a weakling."
Since my race is minor deity, homebrew, one of my party members is my paladin, walks over, and one shots him with thunderous smite
Guards come running, ask whats happening.
Me "We're having a tea party" -rolls nat 20-
Guards, since were obviously not having a tea party, come into the cell a little confused, one stays in cell, others go to alert other guards, my bard friend charms the guard in the cell
This happened in the beginning of OOTA (out of the abyss)
My character sees orc in prison with us, names him orc in the corner
Me "Hey sup wanna be ffrriieennddss?"
Orc "No"
Me "how about if I break your chains with this iron bar?"
Orc grunts
I smite chains breaking them
Orc punches me in the face. "You're a weakling."
Since my race is minor deity, homebrew, one of my party members is my paladin, walks over, and one shots him with thunderous smite
Guards come running, ask whats happening.
Me "We're having a tea party" -rolls nat 20-
Guards, since were obviously not having a tea party, come into the cell a little confused, one stays in cell, others go to alert other guards, my bard friend charms the guard in the cell
I know that this isn't a quote but i wanted to show my profile picture:
Bert didn't know what all that stuff about "his immortal soul" and "aeons of servitude" was, but a 1d10 cantrip sure sounded cool.
Current Character: https://www.dndbeyond.com/profile/MajestorSteel1103/characters/44226318
Leader of the Cult of ANTI-Sedge
Priest of the Supreme Court of Sauce as well as one of the three founders (others being GreatAxeblade and ParticleHex)
Re-enactment of an encounter: The players feel like they were duped by a Ranger into going in circles and returned to where they had round him. A different Ranger was present and started on the same spiel that the other ranger had said:
Ranger (DM): "This is Ranger's Guild territory. Only the most daring, the most charming, and the most--"
Everyone: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "These woods have been protected by--"
Sorcerer: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "The dragon has been overhead--"
Barbarian: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "For three--"
Rogue: "Oh, SKIP!"
Ranger: "The Gods of Natu--"
Artifice: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "The wolves and the frogs--"
Rogue+Sorcerer: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "As long as these woods--"
Rogue: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Rogue: "Skippity-SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SHUT-UP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "Up your butts--"
Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Barbarian: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Rogue: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!" Sorcerer: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!"
Ranger: "You must speak this exact phrase--"
Barbarian: "SKIP!" Artificer: "SKIP!.. SKIP!"
(They fall for another ruse, return to find yet a different Ranger, and immediately all yell, "SKIP!" before she even begins to speak.)
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
In a heated battle, a player rolls his D20, picks it up and rolls it again. The DM asks, "what are you doing?", without missing a beat, player says, "I could not see it, does a 22 hit?"
i don't get it
Come participate in the Competition of the Finest Brews, Edition XXVIII?
My homebrew stuff:
Spells, Monsters, Magic Items, Feats, Subclasses.
I am an Archfey, but nobody seems to notice.
Extended Signature
"Bearer of the curse...SKIP!...seek...SKIP!...seek...SKIP!...lest...SKIP...!"
“Don’t be a tyrannosaurus"
“I tell the dragon that if you water water it grows"
“Why is it that you can drink a drink, but can’t eat a food?"
All hail the great and mighty platypus.
Resisting is simply standing in front of the tide and pushing at it. Even if you endure at first, you will eventually break down. Adapting, by contrast, is turning into a fish.
-me
Rangers are not underpowered. They’re just exploration-oriented.
My homebrew setting: https://www.dndbeyond.com/forums/d-d-beyond-general/story-lore/94809-wakai-a-setting-inspired-by-japanese-folklore-and
This account is kinda old and I haven’t used it in a while
Some groups like to plan before an encounter all through the night and into the next morning. (Exaggerating, but only just.)
There's a DM who let's the players ramble off plans and then interrupts them if they're taking too long, kicking off the encounter - such as they're trying to come up with a cover story and the person they're trying to fool walks in while they're talking about the key points of the plan and hears what they're saying, ruining their plans.
Every time that happens, the Artificer shouts, "Aw, piss!"
Human. Male. Possibly. Don't be a divider.
My characters' backgrounds are written like instruction manuals rather than stories. My opinion and preferences don't mean you're wrong.
I am 99.7603% convinced that the digital dice are messing with me. I roll high when nobody's looking and low when anyone else can see.🎲
“It's a bit early to be thinking about an epitaph. No?” will be my epitaph.
Is this a TF2 reference I smell?
Looking for a campaign? Or, perhaps, trying to start one? Come join Rolegate! Just send me a friend request (same name as here) and I'll help you get started!
Ducks are just geese lite. Focus on the future. It'll become the past soon enough.
Istari and White Counsel in Club. Not the wish-granter of a thread.
Become a Plague Doctor today!
Join the Knights of the Random Table and Calius and Kothar Industries!
Homebrew: Artifact, Dungeon
May be offline due to school
Our Warlock confronted an NPC about drinking too much.
Then later, the Warlock told that NPC not to gamble with his wedding ring.
Later after that, that same NPC gets accused of murder, and is locked up in a cell:
Warlock: “Oy, mate...how ya doin’?”
NPC: (looks up) “Of for the love of...you again?!”
Warlock: “Got yer self inta a right bad situation, dinya?”
NPC: “Who are you?! Why do you keep showing up!?”
Warlock: (grins) “I must be your guardian angel.”
(the Warlock is a tiefling)
NPC: “Very funny...”
Warlock: “Look, I got some questions for ya, mate.”
NPC: “Why can’t you just leave me alone..?”
Warlock: “Cuz you keep makin’ bad decisions!”
That's a pretty good one.
Looking for a campaign? Or, perhaps, trying to start one? Come join Rolegate! Just send me a friend request (same name as here) and I'll help you get started!
Ducks are just geese lite. Focus on the future. It'll become the past soon enough.
Istari and White Counsel in Club. Not the wish-granter of a thread.
Become a Plague Doctor today!
Join the Knights of the Random Table and Calius and Kothar Industries!
Homebrew: Artifact, Dungeon
May be offline due to school
This was from a recent session:
Druid: Don't you guys trust me?
Sorcerer: Remember last session, when you spent 15 minutes trying to figure out if you were able to kill off the rest of the party in one round with thunderwave?
Druid: That was me as a player, not me as a character. [Druid]'s alignment is Chaotic Good. My alignment is Chaotic Neutral. Now, what's your Constitution save, again?
All stars fade. Some stars forever fall.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homebrew (Mostly Outdated): Magic Items, Monsters, Spells, Subclasses
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If there was no light, people wouldn't fear the dark.
"My entire action economy, without the ki points. To kill a motherf*** BUSH!"
Hombrew: Way of Wresting, Circle of Sacrifice
"I cast guidance on the whale."
===========================
Laugh at life or life will laugh at you.
Current D&D Characters:
Kromen Flintfist, Hill Dwarf Order of the Scribes Wizard/Armorer Artificer
Eiphrok, Half-Orc Oath of Glory Paladin/Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer
Me likee healing potees
Helper of Create a World thread/Sedge is Chaotic Neutral/ Mega Yahtzee High: 34, Low: 14/I speak English, je me parle le Francais, agus Labhraim beagan Gaeilge
Dream of Days Lore Bard 9/Wizard 4 Baulder's Gate: Descent to Avernus (In Person/Over Zoom)
Saleadon Morgul Battle Smith Artificer 11 Tyranny of Dragons (In Person/Over Zoom)
Hurtharn Serpti Ghostslayer Blood Hunter 7 Spelljammer (Over Zoom)
Ex Sig
This is cheating because it didn't happen during a D&D session, but I was talking about what happened during our recent session to one of my coworkers.
Co-Worker: Sounds like you had fun riding on the back of a yellow whale.
Me: Don't be ridiculous. There's no such thing as a yellow whale. That is completely unrealistic and unbelievable. The whale was whatever the natural color is for sperm whales. Instead, we were riding inside a magical, yellow, waterproof dome that was sitting on the back of a sentient whale. That's *much* more believable and realistic.
===========================
Laugh at life or life will laugh at you.
Current D&D Characters:
Kromen Flintfist, Hill Dwarf Order of the Scribes Wizard/Armorer Artificer
Eiphrok, Half-Orc Oath of Glory Paladin/Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer
"aardvarks are chaotic evil fiends!!"
I am an average mathematics enjoyer.
>Extended Signature<
Squirrels are Chaotic Evil Aberrations in my campaign. Geese are the fiends. Squirrels and Geese fight often.
Looking for a campaign? Or, perhaps, trying to start one? Come join Rolegate! Just send me a friend request (same name as here) and I'll help you get started!
Ducks are just geese lite. Focus on the future. It'll become the past soon enough.
Istari and White Counsel in Club. Not the wish-granter of a thread.
Become a Plague Doctor today!
Join the Knights of the Random Table and Calius and Kothar Industries!
Homebrew: Artifact, Dungeon
May be offline due to school
This happened in the beginning of OOTA (out of the abyss)
My character sees orc in prison with us, names him orc in the corner
Me "Hey sup wanna be ffrriieennddss?"
Orc "No"
Me "how about if I break your chains with this iron bar?"
Orc grunts
I smite chains breaking them
Orc punches me in the face. "You're a weakling."
Since my race is minor deity, homebrew, one of my party members is my paladin, walks over, and one shots him with thunderous smite
Guards come running, ask whats happening.
Me "We're having a tea party" -rolls nat 20-
Guards, since were obviously not having a tea party, come into the cell a little confused, one stays in cell, others go to alert other guards, my bard friend charms the guard in the cell
etc.
Current Character: https://www.dndbeyond.com/profile/MajestorSteel1103/characters/44226318
Leader of the Cult of ANTI-Sedge
Priest of the Supreme Court of Sauce as well as one of the three founders (others being GreatAxeblade and ParticleHex)
...wow.
Looking for a campaign? Or, perhaps, trying to start one? Come join Rolegate! Just send me a friend request (same name as here) and I'll help you get started!
Ducks are just geese lite. Focus on the future. It'll become the past soon enough.
Istari and White Counsel in Club. Not the wish-granter of a thread.
Become a Plague Doctor today!
Join the Knights of the Random Table and Calius and Kothar Industries!
Homebrew: Artifact, Dungeon
May be offline due to school
You can't cast spells in that part of OotA.
I have a weird sense of humor.
I also make maps.(That's a link)