Last Comment Wins!

I loved talking, but I have to wake up early tomorrow for swimming, so Au Revoir!

Quote from Karavans >>

I loved talking, but I have to wake up early tomorrow for swimming, so Au Revoir!

 BYE! Good luck!

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from ChrisTheSoulcasterMage >>

 LMAO. Would he be evil enough to take up 2 parking spota at once?

 That’s a little too far. Demon kila would park just a little bit over the line

 EVEN WORSE!!! Now I have to try to get in while being terrified of slightly hitting it!

imma go try and find a new pfp. brb 

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

 what game is going on?

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

 what game is going on?

Cyno and Gibber were being warlock patrons so I'm starting up a Warlock MLM.

Quote from VitusW >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

 what game is going on?

Cyno and Gibber were being warlock patrons so I'm starting up a Warlock MLM.

 interesting

what are they offering lol

Ello!

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

 what game is going on?

Cyno and Gibber were being warlock patrons so I'm starting up a Warlock MLM.

 interesting

All you need to do is recruit two friends*, pay a $48 processing fee, and unlimited power is yours!

*in lieu of two friends' souls you will be required to pay with your own; your friends may also get the same deal if they recruit two others and their souls

Quote from VitusW >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

 what game is going on?

Cyno and Gibber were being warlock patrons so I'm starting up a Warlock MLM.

 interesting

All you need to do is recruit two friends*, pay a $48 processing fee, and unlimited power is yours!

*in lieu of two friends' souls you will be required to pay with your own; your friends may also get the same deal if they recruit two others and their souls

 i have $1.38

Quote from VitusW >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from VitusW >>

Since others are getting in on the game, I guess I'll throw my foot into it too.

Have you ever wanted to cast Eldritch Blast?
Do you love invocations?
Are you a fan of getting back all of your spells slots on a short rest?
THEN HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!

If you sign up today you'll not only get your choice of Eldritch Blast but also one more cantrip of your choice from a premium selection.

Have you wanted to wear armor while casting? Do d6s for hit dice scare you? Then don't worry! When you call now you'll get Light Armor proficiency and a d8 hit die. No more being squishy for you, precious caster friends.

You see the key to Vitus Warlockship is that unlike most other pacts, you don't have to sell your soul. Well, not exactly. Because by being my warlock I'll tap in and sublet you warlock powers of my own. Of course these powers are not free of charge. So you'll need to give $48 when signing up in addition to your soul. But that's okay! Because the Vitus Warlockship levels of patronage have a patented trade secret.

The soul you trade does not matter so long as it's a soul. So you can get your powers FREE OF CHARGE so long as you recruit two friends to the Warlockship. And they too can get out of paying with their own souls by getting another two to offer their souls.

With this patented organization system we can all get the powers of warlocks without needing to really give anything up so long as you're willing to put in the work.

Call now for a FREE consultation.

 hmmmm

 what game is going on?

Cyno and Gibber were being warlock patrons so I'm starting up a Warlock MLM.

 interesting

All you need to do is recruit two friends*, pay a $48 processing fee, and unlimited power is yours!

*in lieu of two friends' souls you will be required to pay with your own; your friends may also get the same deal if they recruit two others and their souls

 Great. Now I NEED to see this as an actual comercial. Thanks a lot Vitus.

Look, look these offers may be interesting and all, but I have a serious offer here. 

Have you ever wanted to hold some baby alligators? Maybe sicc some on your friends and enemies alike? Well boy do I have the deal for you! 

Become a Cyno warlock today! You get to pet dogs, crocodilians, and even punch annoying children you don’t like, free of consequence! Ever consider doing something slightly illegal, but was worried about the consequences? No problem! Alligator squads will take out any people that would dare snitch on your Youtube to MP3 downloads. 

We also offer free health insurance (Cynocare) plus dental! And occasionally when I’m not exhausted, free art! 

Our personal favorite plan includes a simple exchange of your mortal soul (we collect it at death - so no worries while you’re alive!), which unlocks every tier of reward from minmaxing with a three level Cyno warlock dip to your edgy paladin. Packing a colorful eldritch blast, some cool evocations, and even a Pact of the Chain with a little gator accompanying you, we have it all! As for your soul? All we do with it is turn it into an adorable marketable plushie. I mean, what were you expecting? Eternal servitude? Don’t read into that contract too hard, we have nothing to hide!

All you gotta do is head down to your nearest tree and ask it to put in a kind word for you, and we’ll get your free trial started. We value all of our loyal customers!

crocodile not included at first level, messaging rates may still apply. free art is not guaranteed 

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Look, look these offers may be interesting and all, but I have a serious offer here. 

Have you ever wanted to hold some baby alligators? Maybe sicc some on your friends and enemies alike? Well boy do I have the deal for you! 

Become a Cyno warlock today! You get to pet dogs, crocodilians, and even punch annoying children you don’t like, free of consequence! Ever consider doing something slightly illegal, but was worried about the consequences? No problem! Alligator squads will take out any people that would dare snitch on your Youtube to MP3 downloads. 

We also offer free health insurance (Cynocare) plus dental! And occasionally when I’m not exhausted, free art! 

Our personal favorite plan includes a simple exchange of your mortal soul (we collect it at death - so no worries while you’re alive!), which unlocks every tier of reward from minmaxing with a three level Cyno warlock dip to your edgy paladin. Packing a colorful eldritch blast, some cool evocations, and even a Pact of the Chain with a little gator accompanying you, we have it all! As for your soul? All we do with it is turn it into an adorable marketable plushie. I mean, what were you expecting? Eternal servitude? Don’t read into that contract too hard, we have nothing to hide!

All you gotta do is head down to your nearest tree and ask it to put in a kind word for you, and we’ll get your free trial started. We value all of our loyal customers!

crocodile not included at first level, messaging rates may still apply. free art is not guaranteed 

 small issue, i live in a desert

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

 small issue, i live in a desert

 Alligators shipped with a large complementary bathtub, free of charge!

Hey Arch, these Become a Warlock Now! comercials have got me thinking: do you get anything specific/out of the ordinary by being a warlock of the Archcrone?

The reason why I ask is because these other 2 patrons grant items and products specific to that pact.

Cyno, what is your obsession with alligators? Not trying to be rude, just askin'.

Quote from cynophobia_ >>

Quote from MoonWatcher19 >>

 small issue, i live in a desert

 Alligators shipped with a large complementary bathtub, free of charge!

 no trees, only sand