So, one of my players is a problem. And we are at a dilemma whether to boot him from our campaigns all together, the reason he is a problem. Is because he: repeatedly invites himself to sessions (when we say he cant come he has a massive arguement with us), Doesnt take any of the game seriously (i know theres suppose to be funny parts, but he just takes the piss out of all of us tryna actually play normally), is just genuinely unfocused sitting on his phone the whole campaign blasting tiktoks and laughing at them he claims he is just 'waiting for his turn because we all take too ******* long' to which he then does not understand anything that is going on and gives us half baked responses, refuses to put in as much effort as the other players (Voices, playing characters ect) which just generally puts other people off and lowers morale, puts in no effort making his character (putting unfunny ass jokes in places meant to describe and build his characters appearance), refuses to make names for his character opting for naming them unfunny jokes (ex gorth the rizzler of women, the scroogiest of griddies. I know these names work for dnd especially with a comic relief character, however it happens every single time and to me. Just shows a lack of wanting to play/commitment to playing the game) and he also blantantly told us he would rather go out than play dnd, then when we say 'ok then go out with some other mates' (cos we dont go out too often) he starts a big arguement about it and becomes really shitty. Now this may sound like an easy question to answer, 'just kick him out and be done with it' however i am worried that it will make further dnd sessions awkward and paint me to seem as some form of tyrant/horrible dm that is strict on the players.
Seriously, the answer is kick him out of the group. If the other players feel the same as you then they will be happy when you kick him out. If you don't kick him out then the good players may leave because they're sick of this guy.
Personally, I'd say kick him, particularly if you've tried to discuss this with him and he hasn't listened. If he's bringing the mood down at the table that bad, I doubt anyone is going to feel like you're being a tyrant for showing him the door.
I was thinking i make a little group full of my other players and make a poll to see whether they want him gone or not, do you reckon that would be a good idea?
I mean im the DM of his upcoming campaign and we have worked on making it for 3 months and him just being the is making us fill with a feeling of dread
If everybody agrees that the problem needs to go, then it's not dictatorial to kick the player. If you don't you will eventually lose the game all together.
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I know what you're thinking: "In that flurry of blows, did he use all his ki points, or save one?" Well, are ya feeling lucky, punk?
Unless you're using the royal "We" your post indicates that everybody in the group is tired of this guy's behavior. That being the case there's no reason to be concerned with coming across as a tyrant/horrible DM. He's the only one that's going to be saying that. If the rest of the group likes his shenanigans then just stop DMing for them because he's ruining your fun and unless they're paying you for your time you're there to have fun too.
But you've already tried to tell him he can't come and he shows up anyways? Can you not lock the door?
Tell him straight that he is not welcome in the group. When he "becomes real shitty" tell him that's exactly the behavior you're talking about. Then walk away. Simply don't engage with him. If he somehow gets into your session then immediately stop the game.
I kind of meant we as in me and my other dm, i am not entirely too sure on my other players thoughts on it. However i've seen clearly that they often get put off by him sitting in the corner on his phone doing nothing, i am planning on having a long chat with him about the things hes doing and why its not working, and if it does go belly up ill take your advice. Thank you by the way i cant emphasize how grateful i am, i was stuck in such a corner with this.
Seems to me like he doesn't have much interest in D&D, but also, that he doesn't have anyone to hang out with. I would say yeah, D&D is not for him, but unless you guys really don't like him, maybe consider inviting him to do something else. You said you don't really go out but surely you do something between sessions.
Yea we do, is just that its very infrequent that we go out. Hes one of my good mates and i dont wanna part ways with him over dnd
Then I would talk to him and explain to him that you guys really are not having fun and it sounds like he is not having fun either, but also that you would like to do something else with him. Don't leave it hanging there with some 'maybe sorta' thing. Schedule it then and there, so he doesn't feel like he just got dumped.
It is extremely easy to take care of this. If you are playing online, send him a DM, he's not a good fit for the campaign and he's no longer invited to play. Kick him from discord and change the meeting invite.
If its in person, move it to someone's home instead of the hobby shop if that's possible. When you allow a bad player to fester it kills the group. You don't ask anonymous people this question, just cut the guy before you lose the group.
So, one of my players is a problem. And we are at a dilemma whether to boot him from our campaigns all together, the reason he is a problem. Is because he: repeatedly invites himself to sessions (when we say he cant come he has a massive arguement with us), Doesnt take any of the game seriously (i know theres suppose to be funny parts, but he just takes the piss out of all of us tryna actually play normally), is just genuinely unfocused sitting on his phone the whole campaign blasting tiktoks and laughing at them he claims he is just 'waiting for his turn because we all take too ******* long' to which he then does not understand anything that is going on and gives us half baked responses, refuses to put in as much effort as the other players (Voices, playing characters ect) which just generally puts other people off and lowers morale, puts in no effort making his character (putting unfunny ass jokes in places meant to describe and build his characters appearance), refuses to make names for his character opting for naming them unfunny jokes (ex gorth the rizzler of women, the scroogiest of griddies. I know these names work for dnd especially with a comic relief character, however it happens every single time and to me. Just shows a lack of wanting to play/commitment to playing the game) and he also blantantly told us he would rather go out than play dnd, then when we say 'ok then go out with some other mates' (cos we dont go out too often) he starts a big arguement about it and becomes really shitty. Now this may sound like an easy question to answer, 'just kick him out and be done with it' however i am worried that it will make further dnd sessions awkward and paint me to seem as some form of tyrant/horrible dm that is strict on the players.
Seriously, the answer is kick him out of the group. If the other players feel the same as you then they will be happy when you kick him out. If you don't kick him out then the good players may leave because they're sick of this guy.
Personally, I'd say kick him, particularly if you've tried to discuss this with him and he hasn't listened. If he's bringing the mood down at the table that bad, I doubt anyone is going to feel like you're being a tyrant for showing him the door.
I was thinking i make a little group full of my other players and make a poll to see whether they want him gone or not, do you reckon that would be a good idea?
I mean im the DM of his upcoming campaign and we have worked on making it for 3 months and him just being the is making us fill with a feeling of dread
If everybody agrees that the problem needs to go, then it's not dictatorial to kick the player. If you don't you will eventually lose the game all together.
I know what you're thinking: "In that flurry of blows, did he use all his ki points, or save one?" Well, are ya feeling lucky, punk?
Unless you're using the royal "We" your post indicates that everybody in the group is tired of this guy's behavior. That being the case there's no reason to be concerned with coming across as a tyrant/horrible DM. He's the only one that's going to be saying that. If the rest of the group likes his shenanigans then just stop DMing for them because he's ruining your fun and unless they're paying you for your time you're there to have fun too.
But you've already tried to tell him he can't come and he shows up anyways? Can you not lock the door?
Tell him straight that he is not welcome in the group. When he "becomes real shitty" tell him that's exactly the behavior you're talking about. Then walk away. Simply don't engage with him. If he somehow gets into your session then immediately stop the game.
I kind of meant we as in me and my other dm, i am not entirely too sure on my other players thoughts on it. However i've seen clearly that they often get put off by him sitting in the corner on his phone doing nothing, i am planning on having a long chat with him about the things hes doing and why its not working, and if it does go belly up ill take your advice. Thank you by the way i cant emphasize how grateful i am, i was stuck in such a corner with this.
Yes thank you all(im the other dm)
Seems to me like he doesn't have much interest in D&D, but also, that he doesn't have anyone to hang out with. I would say yeah, D&D is not for him, but unless you guys really don't like him, maybe consider inviting him to do something else. You said you don't really go out but surely you do something between sessions.
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Yea we do, is just that its very infrequent that we go out. Hes one of my good mates and i dont wanna part ways with him over dnd
Then I would talk to him and explain to him that you guys really are not having fun and it sounds like he is not having fun either, but also that you would like to do something else with him. Don't leave it hanging there with some 'maybe sorta' thing. Schedule it then and there, so he doesn't feel like he just got dumped.
DM mostly, Player occasionally | Session 0 form | He/Him/They/Them
EXTENDED SIGNATURE!
Doctor/Published Scholar/Science and Healthcare Advocate/Critter/Trekkie/Gandalf with a Glock
Try DDB free: Free Rules (2024), premade PCs, adventures, one shots, encounters, SC, homebrew, more
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Alright, will do. Thanks btw
It is extremely easy to take care of this. If you are playing online, send him a DM, he's not a good fit for the campaign and he's no longer invited to play. Kick him from discord and change the meeting invite.
If its in person, move it to someone's home instead of the hobby shop if that's possible. When you allow a bad player to fester it kills the group. You don't ask anonymous people this question, just cut the guy before you lose the group.