Ranger: I send a herd of reindeer to trample the BBEG [basically the grinch] DM (not me this time): How do you kill him? Ranger: It's like the stampede scene from "The Lion King" but without the sad.
Kraken Priest: Yes! I have drawn you down here! You may have bested my servants, but now you shall face the power of Nereus! Lori (tiefling tempest cleric): Give us control of the ship! Holly (Half-Orc druid/barbarian): *growls to give advantage* Lori: *rolls nat 20* Kraken Priest: *fails save* Okay! Cultist: You're just going to give it to them? Holly: *growls* Cultist: Okay, you win!
Incubus: Imps! Come to do my bidding! Giovanni (Tiefling Blood Hunter/Rogue): Why weren't they here before? Incubus: *me as the dm stumbles for an explanation* They were on their union-mandated break.
I didn't know that devils had worker's unions.
they do their whole thing is being a giant infernal union
"I, Sir William James-Jackson Donahue the Second, shall not partake in this feast, for I view no Whoppers, nor Big Macs. Good day. Geoffrey, with me. I'm off to Micky D's. If they deny my patronage for a third time, then BK."
"I, Sir William James-Jackson Donahue the Second, shall not partake in this feast, for I view no Whoppers, nor Big Macs. Good day. Geoffrey, with me. I'm off to Micky D's. If they deny my patronage for a third time, then BK."
In some cases, I would request context. But this, this is too glorious for context.
"I, Sir William James-Jackson Donahue the Second, shall not partake in this feast, for I view no Whoppers, nor Big Macs. Good day. Geoffrey, with me. I'm off to Micky D's. If they deny my patronage for a third time, then BK."
In some cases, I would request context. But this, this is too glorious for context.
A man of eloquence & taste, to be sure.
I like how there is a knock-off McDonalds in this world, called Mickey D‘s...and that this guy has managed to get kicked out two times already.
The party came across a malevolent cult. They capture a member of the cult and ask “what do you worship?” “We worship Nonya” “who dat?” ”Nonya business”
Dm: The monk successfully impersonates a stone, you on the other hand stand on top of a rock and cover your eyes. By your logic if you can't see them they can't see you.
Dm: The monk successfully impersonates a stone, you on the other hand stand on top of a rock and cover your eyes. By your logic if you can't see them they can't see you.
Why do I feel like that's actually something your character might think?
Dm: The monk successfully impersonates a stone, you on the other hand stand on top of a rock and cover your eyes. By your logic if you can't see them they can't see you.
Why do I feel like that's actually something your character might think?
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken. Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing. Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan. Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer. Plays god on Saturdays.
I hate everything about this. I weep for the DM, I shudder to think of what even is the endgame of the characters. This makes me so very glad i don't have players like this in my campaigns.
just got back from another session here is a gold one "is the wall under a 1000 ft tall" says me dm says"yes barely" then i say "im over the wall"
and finally it ends this gem "congrats you escaped the boundries of the world level up"
Check out my homebrew subclasses spells magic items feats monsters races
i am a sauce priest
help create a world here
From a Christmas oneshot:
Ranger: I send a herd of reindeer to trample the BBEG [basically the grinch]
DM (not me this time): How do you kill him?
Ranger: It's like the stampede scene from "The Lion King" but without the sad.
*immediately dies due to lack of CO2*
Ah, that makes a bit more sense.
im an air genasi so i did not die
Check out my homebrew subclasses spells magic items feats monsters races
i am a sauce priest
help create a world here
"I, Sir William James-Jackson Donahue the Second, shall not partake in this feast, for I view no Whoppers, nor Big Macs. Good day. Geoffrey, with me. I'm off to Micky D's. If they deny my patronage for a third time, then BK."
"every self respecting tavern has a blue dragon"
my character refering to the magic wine in my setting not the creature
Check out my homebrew subclasses spells magic items feats monsters races
i am a sauce priest
help create a world here
In some cases, I would request context. But this, this is too glorious for context.
A man of eloquence & taste, to be sure.
I like how there is a knock-off McDonalds in this world, called Mickey D‘s...and that this guy has managed to get kicked out two times already.
[You probably won't get this if you're not from the UK.]
"Hurrah! We have saved Middlesborough form the dragon!"
Chilling kinda vibe.
The party came across a malevolent cult. They capture a member of the cult and ask “what do you worship?” “We worship Nonya” “who dat?” ”Nonya business”
Dm: Okay roll stealth
Me: Rolls
Monk: Nat 20
Me: This might be a bad time but I got a nat 1
Dm: The monk successfully impersonates a stone, you on the other hand stand on top of a rock and cover your eyes. By your logic if you can't see them they can't see you.
: Systems Online : Nikoli_Goodfellow Homebrew : My WIP Homebrew Class :
(\_/)
( u u)
o/ \🥛🍪 Hey, take care of yourself alright?
PC 1: “Am I the only one who thinks killing little baby manticores is morally grey?!”
PC 2: “Yes. Yes you are.”
Lizardfolk Druid: “Here, have a lillypad cake.”
NPC: *takes a bite* “Blah! You EAT this? It tastes like dirt and mud... and algea!”
Druid: “Don’t worry, that’s just the swamp water. Aren’t they delicious?”
Barbarian (whispering): “Ignore him, he’s a little coo-coo.”
“As my bonus action, I incinerate some perfectly good grass.”
PC: “I ask their names.”
DM: “They tell you their names.”
PC: “What are their names?”
DM: “Um... I didn’t come up with names for them.”
PC (in group chat): “Bob, Bobby, Bobette, and Bob Jr.”
RIP Tavern.
All hail King Jovan Fluffycloud Prince
Teleporting elf monk supremacy!, but druids are better
[Cactus]Waffles!”I don’t have any good quotes to put in my sig.” -Me
I spent 6 weeks living in Middlesborough doing a course at North Riding Infirmary back in 1993 ish. It was an interesting time.
Why do I feel like that's actually something your character might think?
I have a weird sense of humor.
I also make maps.(That's a link)
Slowly looks in any other direction
: Systems Online : Nikoli_Goodfellow Homebrew : My WIP Homebrew Class :
(\_/)
( u u)
o/ \🥛🍪 Hey, take care of yourself alright?
"Theren, is he doing the 'shame kink' you told me about? You will not shame kink me!"
Nikolai Buckman | vampire | bard
Solace Redgrove | tiefling | bard
my friend, who plays as goofy from mickey mouse said "So... who can we kill?'
My response "Depends"
Goofy "can we burn the other town on the map and raid the orphanage for human flesh so we won't get hungry?"
Me "Sure?"
My other friend who was a rouge "This sounds like fun." he then tells me that he wants to drink all the ale that they just stole.
later at the town:
Goofy "I kill the adults first so everyone's an orphan then kill the rest."
The rouge "I'll steal some ale and burn the town."
Me "You... Do that... I guess."
my friend who is a fighter "I'll steal the kneecaps for my collection."
Me "ok?"
ROuge and goofy "done"
fighter "I'll rob the bank."
me "the rouge just burned it."
fighter "oh... I guess I'll just gnaw on this kneecap."
Something is wrong with your party. :/
Maximilian "Mad Max" Oceanus, transmutation wizard, best known for being on the team that saved the universe from Kozelak's infinite hunger, and also an avenger of the Unspoken.
Olaf Ericsson, a jolly ranger with a bit of an anger problem. Also likes to sing.
Yaethel Akeelan, a druid with a plan; a very, very big plan.
Damien Rook, full time author, part time adventurer.
Plays god on Saturdays.
I hate everything about this. I weep for the DM, I shudder to think of what even is the endgame of the characters. This makes me so very glad i don't have players like this in my campaigns.
|| Sol Night-Arrow, Tabaxi Ranger ||
||Currently DMing a Homebrew Campaign ||
Guides or Important Threads of Mine ----- || List of ALL Official Familiars || My Homebrew Monsters ||
Level 3 One Shot Character Concepts ----- || Fist of the Gods || Triple Tap Hunter || Bullseye Dartmaster || Captain America ||
^^^Those are Links BTW^^^