I know some DMs have a “no dating/romance” policy in their games. I could handle that for a one shot or even like a four day tournament but in a long term campaign I would get bored if I couldn’t explore that facet of my characters’ lives. What do you guys think?
This depends on the other players at your table. I had a couple who pcs were married in the game. I have some couples where their pcs did not like each other. I had some people have their pcs flirt with other pcs. The flirting was okay for some of the players, but I had to tell the flirter not to hit on two of the players pcs. One person was uncomfortable because they thought the flirter was indirectly asking them for a date. The other person was uncomfortable for reasons not given. SO talk to your fellow players.
Awesome. Thanks for answering. But I was also thinking of PCs dating NPCs (one of my friends her character actually married an NPC bard after they’d been dating in character for a year but by then her and the DM were dating for real).
It’s all a personal thing. Even if the DM allows it the other player(s) may object. Basically, follow the same rules as real life: Have an honest conversation with the person first, gain their consent before doing anything either of you might regret, and if they say no then no means no, but yes means yes is more important so if they say they are no longer comfortable or wish to stop for any reason then that means the yes you got before has been revoked and you must stop.
Also, PC romance may be fine, but when emotions turn physical the camera should pan to the fireplace and then a scene change because nobody else at the table will want to sit through it.
Basically, be honest, respectful, polite, considerate and sincere.
Awesome. Thanks for answering. But I was also thinking of PCs dating NPCs (one of my friends her character actually married an NPC bard after they’d been dating in character for a year but by then her and the DM were dating for real).
IMO, NPCs are fair game as long as the DM is comfortable RPing the romance and the rest of the players don’t mind. So, basically everything I said in my last post.
It’s all a personal thing. Even if the DM allows it the other player(s) may object. Basically, follow the same rules as real life: Have an honest conversation with the person first, gain their consent before doing anything either of you might regret, and if they say no then no means no, but yes means yes is more important so if they say they are no longer comfortable or wish to stop for any reason then that means the yes you got before has been revoked and you must stop.
Also, PC romance may be fine, but when emotions turn physical the camera should pan to the fireplace and then a scene change because nobody else at the table will want to sit through it.
Basically, be honest, respectful, polite, considerate and sincere.
Absolutely agree. Thank you guys all of you for answering.
For me, it always depends on the other person. Most people I’m just not that comfortable RPing that kind of intimacy with. When I am, it can be very rewarding. Two of the PCs in my current game have romantic partners, and it makes for interesting stories and gets all the involved parties mutually invested, which is really nice! But it would feel weird with even some other people at my own table.
We don't have a policy, but in about 10 years of weekly games it hasn't really come up, outside of like a bard being way over the top to flirt their way past a guard or something. It weirds me out a bit to picture a romance being played out at my table, but maybe that's just because I'm not used to it. Or maybe it's because we're older.
It's just not really a necessary thing in the stories we're telling. There was no romance in Moana, or Aliens, or The Shawshank Redemption, or Godfather II.
True. Moana was a cool movie, though I question your statement that there was no romance in the Godfather (didn’t Michael have a gf named Kay?). I personally like it and so do most of the people I play with, which is why I asked this question. Adds depth and realism and a little spice to the game. But thank you for answering.
My NPCs sometimes flirt with each other and date each other and my players sometimes witness the affection. This is basically me saying that the topic is open for them if they want to explore it. If they observe NPC's trying it, maybe they get more comfortable. Or maybe not, hard to say. So far they seem to be interested more in my NPCs than in each other despite being married xD
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
To post a comment, please login or register a new account.
I know some DMs have a “no dating/romance” policy in their games. I could handle that for a one shot or even like a four day tournament but in a long term campaign I would get bored if I couldn’t explore that facet of my characters’ lives. What do you guys think?
This depends on the other players at your table. I had a couple who pcs were married in the game. I have some couples where their pcs did not like each other. I had some people have their pcs flirt with other pcs. The flirting was okay for some of the players, but I had to tell the flirter not to hit on two of the players pcs. One person was uncomfortable because they thought the flirter was indirectly asking them for a date. The other person was uncomfortable for reasons not given. SO talk to your fellow players.
No Gaming is Better than Bad Gaming.
Awesome. Thanks for answering. But I was also thinking of PCs dating NPCs (one of my friends her character actually married an NPC bard after they’d been dating in character for a year but by then her and the DM were dating for real).
It’s all a personal thing. Even if the DM allows it the other player(s) may object. Basically, follow the same rules as real life: Have an honest conversation with the person first, gain their consent before doing anything either of you might regret, and if they say no then no means no, but yes means yes is more important so if they say they are no longer comfortable or wish to stop for any reason then that means the yes you got before has been revoked and you must stop.
Also, PC romance may be fine, but when emotions turn physical the camera should pan to the fireplace and then a scene change because nobody else at the table will want to sit through it.
Basically, be honest, respectful, polite, considerate and sincere.
Creating Epic Boons on DDB
DDB Buyers' Guide
Hardcovers, DDB & You
Content Troubleshooting
IMO, NPCs are fair game as long as the DM is comfortable RPing the romance and the rest of the players don’t mind. So, basically everything I said in my last post.
Creating Epic Boons on DDB
DDB Buyers' Guide
Hardcovers, DDB & You
Content Troubleshooting
Absolutely agree. Thank you guys all of you for answering.
I think part of it is I’m instinctively good at boundaries and dealing with stuff like that, but not everyone is as adept at dealing with it as I am.
For me, it always depends on the other person. Most people I’m just not that comfortable RPing that kind of intimacy with. When I am, it can be very rewarding. Two of the PCs in my current game have romantic partners, and it makes for interesting stories and gets all the involved parties mutually invested, which is really nice! But it would feel weird with even some other people at my own table.
We don't have a policy, but in about 10 years of weekly games it hasn't really come up, outside of like a bard being way over the top to flirt their way past a guard or something. It weirds me out a bit to picture a romance being played out at my table, but maybe that's just because I'm not used to it. Or maybe it's because we're older.
It's just not really a necessary thing in the stories we're telling. There was no romance in Moana, or Aliens, or The Shawshank Redemption, or Godfather II.
My homebrew subclasses (full list here)
(Artificer) Swordmage | Glasswright | (Barbarian) Path of the Savage Embrace
(Bard) College of Dance | (Fighter) Warlord | Cannoneer
(Monk) Way of the Elements | (Ranger) Blade Dancer
(Rogue) DaggerMaster | Inquisitor | (Sorcerer) Riftwalker | Spellfist
(Warlock) The Swarm
True. Moana was a cool movie, though I question your statement that there was no romance in the Godfather (didn’t Michael have a gf named Kay?). I personally like it and so do most of the people I play with, which is why I asked this question. Adds depth and realism and a little spice to the game. But thank you for answering.
My NPCs sometimes flirt with each other and date each other and my players sometimes witness the affection. This is basically me saying that the topic is open for them if they want to explore it. If they observe NPC's trying it, maybe they get more comfortable. Or maybe not, hard to say. So far they seem to be interested more in my NPCs than in each other despite being married xD