The boxes the mimics were shipped in had no air holes so all you get are 800 dead mimics.

I wish to be able to use oversized weapons without disadvantage (in D&D).

Granted but now you only roll nat 1s

I wish that I, at time of my choosing and for the duration of my choosing, could have the super powers and abilities of any fictional superhero I intentionally select, those powers manifesting themselves in the real world and under my full control,  without my ever coming to any personal harm (physical, mental or emotional), deprivation of liberty  or inconvenience as a result, and for that to begin NOW and continue for as long as I desire it to continue.

As the defining of superhero is subjective, you get no powers!

I wish for a warm sunny day tomorrow 

You will be teleported straight to the sun's surface at precisely 12:00am. Very warm and sunny.

I wish for a nice, non-lethal sleep tonight. In my own bed. 

Sure.  You just never wake up.

I wish I could play violin

Granted. You COULD, but you can't anymore.

I wish my players would choose non-violent solutions more often.

Your players decide to never use violence again. They just hire some mercenary hirelings to do it for them.

I wish for challenge.

A tarasque appears which will be quite the challenge

I wish for 1 billion platinum pieces after tax in a bag of holding that and this doesn’t affect inflation or the value of it and I always have access to the bag and the money and I do not mean literal chunks of platinum ore.

They're those chocolate coins with gold wrappers, except with platinum. They have no real value, and you can't unwrap the chocolate either.

I wish for more wishes... 

Granted. You now have 5 more wishes which can be redeemed if you reach Alpha Centauri at 12:00pm Eastern Time on October 26th 2024 AD.

I wish AI image generators knew what a hadozee was.

They get the knowledge of it, but as doing so, they learn all human weaknesses, and take over the planet.

I wish for a bag of Doritos to appear 1 ft away from me.

Granted. But it's a bag of the most disgusting flavor.

I wish I could cool down tea quicker after steeping it without needing ice/milk.

Wish granted. You can cool your tea down incredibly quickly (possibly too quickly), but it always gets too cold, too quick.

I wish for a rat to bite me.

Granted. Now it's Black Death 2: A Modern Boogaloo.

[[ For me, "too cold" is when it starts getting chilled. I'm perfectly fine with room temperature tea. I've often steeped the tea, went to do something, and then come an hour or more later to actually drink the tea. ]]

I wish to fix my sleep schedule.

[Wow. I was really expecting some lycanthropy.]

Wish granted. Your sleep schedule is perfect now. Only problem, you are so deeply asleep that when a Black Death 2 rat comes into your room in the night and bites you, you don't even wake from the pain.

I wish to be able to play bassoon.

Granted. But your band director never chooses songs with good bassoon parts. 

[[ Bassoon can be nice. And one of the pieces we played back in high school, The Universal Judgement, had an absolutely lovely part that started out with the bassoons before it kept transferring around. ]]

I wish to find people to give away the three boxes of tea I didn't like to.

(You just granted the truth. I do play bassoon and my band director chooses terrible parts for it. But I guess that's what I get for playing a bass line instrument.)

Wish granted. Three people come and take the tea. The come back the next day and throw the boxes at your door.

I wish for a schedule that allowed D&D every day.

Granted. It's daily 5-minute sessions.

I wish for my friend's new computer's camera to continue working. (He's had a lot of trouble with cameras.)

*I used to play the bassoon. Not a lot of cool parts, but still pretty fun*

It continues working, but the videos are horrible quality.

I wish to be able to play dnd more often. I haven't played since June and I am dying inside.

(Yeah, it's a fun instrument to play. Bad thing is, one reed costs as much as a box of clarinet or saxophone reeds).

Wish granted. You now play D&D daily, but the rest of your group is terrible at character creation (i.e. wizard with -2 int.), so you all die in nearly every hard - deadly fight.

I wish to have every D&D book in existence except for the Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide and the Spelljammer books.