The Argiope Coronam has come to be called the Crown-weaver spider because Argiope Coronam is hard to remember and the Crown-weaver’s venom inflicts a similar effect to the spell Crown of Madness.
The spider appears like many others, seemingly harmless, tiny household spider; it’s true nature is revealed however, when you see the underbelly of the spider. Red and purple markings near the creature's venom sacs indicate the arachnid’s potent venom. A trained eye may also notice the more delicate needle-like fangs.
The intent is for this spider to be used alongside some drow, or regular spiders to sew havoc, to have an ally seemingly bewitched and violent, and for the cause not to be some invisible or hidden wizard, but in fact hiding on the body of your ally, fiendishly difficult to spot but easy to remove.
I for one recommend hiding a few of these in a bucket along with a swarm of spiders…. And then trapping a hallway to drop the bucket on an adventurer that fails to notice the traps trigger. That’s sure to incite some groans at the table, as the thought of being covered in spiders doesn’t appeal to many, and they may perceive the first few attacks as the character’s attempt to rid themselves of the spider swarm about their person.
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The Stone Giant Hunters are outliers from Stone Giant culture. Typically left as peripheral guardians, this sect of Stone Giants have taken it upon themselves to try and earn their way back into the “inner sanctum” through presentation of great trophies and plentiful resources.
Each giant creates their own bow and arrows. These colossal bows stand up to 30 feet tall, with arrows the width of fence posts, also some 15 foot long. A typical calculation of Mighty Bow length is one-and-a-half times the Giant’s own height, with arrows 1- or 2-feet longer than the draw distance of the bow. Due to the great size of the weapon and its ammunition, the giants do not carry an abundance of them, and once they have expended their ammunition they will temporarily abandon their bow in favour of their large axes that also serve as tools for the felling of trees.
Due to their neutral nature and lack of concern in the outside world (considering it to be a dream-like place of no consequence or danger), Stone Giant hunters don’t show fear in the face of even the mightiest of foes, and are often approachable, as they simply do not see any creature outside of their own race as a threat. The counter side of this is a Giant who feels they have been wronged can also switch from amiable to hostile in a split-second, unhindered by concern of consequence, they may offhandedly insult someone, brush them aside, or kill them, with little motivation.
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Plague wyverns are created by followers of Gods such as Yurtrus and Incabulos. They capture and torture the wyverns with poisons and diseases, both magical and mundane. Arguably the most abhorrent part of the process is the removal of the wyvern’s stinger.
A variation of the wyvern, this creature could be used to bolster the ranks of a cult, an environmental encounter that indicates the presence of such nearby cults, or even a plot hook to seek a cure for the once noble or noble-adjacent creature.
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No, this is not Robert Baratheon, this is a leather-clad Satyr that has made a pact with the Lord of the Hunt. This is a creature that lives for the thrill of the hunt, for excitement or one sort or another. A fearsome warrior and a worrisome hedonist.
Typically adorned in leather armours, a helmet that exposes their horns and scantily clad in green and brown cloth. The Stag Knight is a unique silhouette on the battlefield. The Satyr’s typically ram-like horns become twisted and elongated like those of a stag, their length and size a testament to the length of time they have loyally served the Lord of the Hunt.
With their fabled pact weapons they are able to snare their quarry and allow the Wild Hunt time to close in and capture their prey. Any hunting party isn’t really a party until the Stag Knight arrives.
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The Xanmu is a green-eyed monster. It is the demonic embodiment of envy, and as such it wants what you have. Ugly, swollen and green, its few arms and many eyes are unsettling to look upon as it attempts to wrestle your possessions out of your hands.
In the true spirit of envy, once a Xanmu has acquired something it wants, it will rapidly become bored and unsatisfied, choosing to either drop it, or throw it at its previous owner.
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Mimes are mysterious entertainers, although often the subject of ridicule or annoyance a truly excellent mime can amaze and bewitch an audience with their performance. Those elite mimes are often inducted into a college of the arts that lies somewhere between illusion and conjuration. Some say this is the shadow weave, some believe it is faith and others swear they can see the wires, smoke and mirrors that expose the mime as a fraudster.
A mime can be a friend or a foe to any adventuring party.
If you choose foe, then consider this; The party have been hired to protect a noble at a large event, the party do not know who a potential assassin may be, so they must prepare the event’s security. The mime will attempt to conjure a weapon and attack the noble, using his performance and deception skills to ensure it is a surprise. Regardless of how successful the attack is, the mime will probably need to use his skills to escape, blocking doors with wall of force, or using a prop ladder to gain height and using his walls to stay aloft or bridge the gap from building to building.
If you choose friend, the perhaps the mime can assist the party scale a sheer cliff’s edge. By conjuring his walls as steps he can slowly ascend any wall five foot at a time, however the party must come up with some clever method to ensure they don’t fall, whether it is using their natural dexterity and speed or perhaps covering the wall segments in dirt so the party can see them it is up to you. If the mime’s stairs stray too close to a giant eagles nest and territory the great beast will surely attack, the party should endeavour to protect the mime as if his concentration drops… so will they all.
That being said, negotiations or conversations with a mime are tough, often devolving into a game of charades. This can be an interesting way to communicate in character for a DM, but if your players really aren’t getting it, allow their characters an insight check to decrypt your clues.
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The Landu is the demonic embodiment of sloth. Similar in many ways to a large slug, it has a great gaping mouth that is half the circumference of its body, two droopy eyes, and it propels itself, albeit slowly, with four very short legs.
The Landu exudes an aura that slows the reactions of those nearby, and can also cause them to lose the will to move or fight. Its gaping maw, when yawning, can slow its enemies, and its favoured form of offence is to sit on and suffocate adversaries.
Easy to outrun, but so abhorrent you want to kill it. Decisions, decisions. Perhaps it can wait until tomorrow.
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The origin of the Pigasus is a petty one, a mage with a penchant for gambling was owed quite the sum of money but the debt was ignored with spite, “When pigs fly!”.
The young mage then turned to his studies, taking the idiom literally. His research of pigs and winged creatures coming to a head with the pegasus. After months of work he was able to conjure a purebreed pigasus, the first of it’s kind. When he confronted his gambling companion astride a flying pig, the speechless degenerate was quick to pay.
Once the pigasus was created, things got out of hand. They became popular, and specialist breeders became pigasus experts, breeding flying mounts, corrupting pigasus into demonic hell-boars, domesticating them for house pets and raising them on farms for flying pork and bacon.
A sample encounter for four level 6 players. *Difficulty Medium, Total XP: 1,500, Adjusted XP: 3,000*
Three Dretches atop Three Hell-Boar Pigasi
Read to your players, three Dretches appear on the horizon, they appear to be moving quickly. As the Dretches come over the hill they appear to be mounted atop demonic looking warthogs with black feathered wings. They leap into the air and take flight, the Dretches ready their weapons, small white spheres, packed snow.
That’s right, three demons on flying pigs chucking snowballs. Roll initiative.
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A mythical creature of Aztec / Mesoamerican culture, the Ahuizotl is a small, dog-like being that ambushes fishermen from the water. It is said to have black fur, either smooth or spiked, four legs of which the front two may end in humanoid hands, and a tail that has a humanoid hand at the end.
Anything that approaches the water’s edge or spends to long in the depths runs the risk of becoming the Ahuizotl’s prey. It will ambush those unaware of it, and attempt to drag them to the depths to drown.
A wasteful creature, the Ahuizotl’s preferred food is eyes, nails and teeth, leaving the rest of the corpse to eventually float back to the surface of its watery domain.
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Similar to the Stag Knight, this high ranking Fey is a loyal servant of a Fey court.
Known for their ability to monopolise sound, they are experts in stealth despite their heavy armour. Once engaged in combat however they become thunderous forces of nature, using deafening sounds to disorient and damage their foes with their Thundering steps and Thundermauls. It is said the Lady of Twilight does not wish for her enemies to see her Knights coming, but she wants all to hear them arrive.
A Silent Knight is a deadly merchant of death, but more importantly they hold a position of necessity in the Twilight court. Answering only to the Lady of Twilight and the Knight of Twilight themselves. Upon death their armour and weaponry evaporate into light and sound before returning to their Lady, waiting to be bestowed upon a worthy successor.
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Today’s monsters are the 1d6 Barbarians. Looks like we rolled a 3.
We thought we’d try something a little different with today’s monsters. With so many archetypes for so many different classes, there are some slightly more obscure builds that might be overlooked or maybe even unheard of. We decided to build some NPCs of varying levels and varying non-core archetypes to showcase their differences, and so that you can simply “drag and drop” them into your own campaign setting should the need arise.
Barbarians are mighty warriors, but they come in all shapes and sizes, tapping into a deep fury to enhance their already impressive strength. Be it a member of the town guard with anger issues, a savage warrior of the badlands or just the rudest gnome who has ever challenged you to an arm wrestling match, all of these character concepts have one thing in common; They are as adept at dealing damage as they are at taking it, and they look pretty bad-ass whilst doing so.
So, here’s a few of our character concepts; A Dwarf whose inherited weapon is a conduit of its revered ancestors. These spiritual guardians guide and protect the party. A Dragonborn of a desert tribe, who harnesses the elemental fury of the burning sands to incinerate foes and shield friends. A Half-orc legend amongst berserkers, knowing only war they are zealous fury personified, seeking glorious death, be it their own or others.
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Roman Mythology says that when a Cacus stole cattle from Heracles, Heracles took it upon himself to slay the monster. A battle of boulder and tree throwing occurred until Heracles dug through the top of the mountain where the Cacus lived, jumped into the centre of the smoke, and strangled the Cacus to death.
Whether or not you choose to believe that a single man defeated a Cacus, and didn’t just get eaten, the Cacus do pose a very real threat. Extremely angry giants, they leave a gory mural around the entrance to their home to ward off invaders.
With a hatred burning so fiercely inside them they can actually blow smoke and fire, these Giants should be treated with just as much caution as any Dragon.
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These reclusive Storm Giants are sometimes referred to as Sea Giants, or Ocean Titans. They stand anywhere from twenty five to thirty feet tall, with light green skin, dark green hair and eyes. Although their skin becomes mottled with barnacles and lichen, their hair becomes webbed or tangled with seaweed, and their eyes become lighter, taking on the depth of the ocean. They tend to adorn themselves in clothes made from the sails of ships, these sails can be from sunken wrecks, or the giant may attack a ship that strays too close to their homes. Trinkets such as anchors, a ship’s wheel or netting and rigging are used as jewellery and adornments.
Water-bearers are granted their name as they carry an Urn of water with them. It is from this spiritual and physical connection to water they derive their wisdom and physical skill. Each morning a water-bearer will refill their urn using whatever source they have available, or using their ability to control the weather and summon a rainstorm if there is no water source available. They then purify this water, creating potable water. After a year and a day of these rituals the urn becomes magical in itself, and gives off an aura of purity, although the water-bearer will continue the ritual regardless.
Should you wish to represent a water-bearer that is less than a year into their training, take away the aura and their raging waves stance, also adjust the lightning surge to recharge on 6 rather than 5-6. The challenge rating will remain the same however.
Water-bearers are hermit-like martial arts masters, perhaps a party member could convince one to take them on as a pupil but this is rare, such as with the Hobgoblin Stoneclaw.
It is more likely that a Water-bearer will either serve as an ally, with knowledge the party desire or the ability to scry upon someone for the party. Alternatively as an antagonist, with the party needing to visit the water-bearer’s underwater home or island. They are very territorial giants, but can always be reasoned with as long as the party hasn’t done too much to offend them.
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A Yeti Abomination is an abominable Yeti that has been corrupted and twisted into an aberration. These savages are more feral and ferocious than their already abominable counterparts. With dark grey, matted and oft bloodstained fur, dark black twisted horns, eyes instilled with rage and crooked black fangs these creatures are dangerous and it is not advised to attempt diplomacy.
Corruption may be the result of a dark ritual, captured Yetis that are twisted to the will of evil gods. It may be a result of insidious and ancient magics in a desecrated temple or a malicious power taking root in the mind of the Yeti and slowly turning the creature into an instrument of death. It is also possible that a naturally aggressive Abominable Yeti could devote itself to malevolent forces in order to satiate an overwhelming bloodlust and be “blessed” with this transformation.
Regardless of the reason, these dangerous creations are often found guarding forbidden places, due to their territorial nature, or used as inconsiderate assassins, overwhelming entire winter caravans to achieve their goals.
The convoy is transporting leathers, silks, preserved food and various trinkets. Every turn the convoy guards deal 22 (4d10) damage to the Yetis if the adventurers intervene, the caravan is destroyed after 1d12+6 rounds at which point they stop damaging the Yetis. If they choose not to intervene then the yetis destroy the caravan in 1d10+4 rounds.
The Lynching Tree was a once ordinary tree. Over many years, subjected to cruel and heinous acts in its boughs, it has grown to hate humanoids, the beings capable of such inhumanity towards one another.
Infused with the souls of the innocents that have been killed in its boughs, and presuming the worst of any humanoids that approach it, the Lynching Tree will try and preemptively hang and strangle any who approach. It can also unleash a scream made by the spirits of the innocent souls, psychically assaulting those nearby.
A couple of examples of how a Lynching Tree could be used:
A party are travelling and see an NPC wandering into the tree line, suddenly grasped by the tree, and barely clinging to life. As they approach, the tree attacks.
The party are searching for a sheltered place to camp. They find a tree with a dense canopy and the remnants of what look like a child’s rope swing. The Lynching Tree waits until the party are camping down and setting up watches and they makes its move, starting with those on watch.
Today’s monsters are the 1d6 Bards, and we rolled another 3.
Bards are crafty spellcasters, often thought of as lofty musicians, strumming a lute whilst bringing some arcane energy to the battlefield. A bard is often the face of a party, persuading folk into giving up some more information, or haggling down the blacksmith’s prices. All tried and true, but not everyone has to fit into the tradition.
Bards can be leaders; a pirate captain with a penchant for exploration, adventure and the freedom of the open sea. Bards can be thieves, with their expertise of sleight of hand and thieves’ tools added to their natural confidence and hustling. Bards can be nobles, inspiring their court and subjects.
So, here’s a few of our character concepts;
A Tiefling taught magic by pixies, after being shunned by a society that rejects tiefling-kind, this tiefling embraced their otherworldly nature, but not in a malicious sense.
A Half-elven warrior, raised by a human soldier their skill with weapons and armour is significant, but the latent magic of their elven bloodline shines through. A natural leader this sergeant inspires and leads his troops from the front.
A Halfling diplomat, using his skill and position to gather information and sell it to the highest bidder, usually neighbouring kingdoms. Able to create scandal through the assassination and subsequent impersonation of key individuals, although for this he often has to use potions of enlargement.
Personally I believe our whispering diplomat to be an excellent villain in a more social game, although the swords sargeant is the easiest to drop in as a rival, ally or foe.
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The Granderhobb is a more powerful Banderhobb that has specialised in the kidnapping of spellcasters or those who would use magical items to escape it’s stomach. It’s antimagic belly shuts down many magical escape options. As such the Granderhobb is the minion of choice for spats between hags, or to trap a wizard.
Creatures of shadow and flesh, despite the Granderhobb’s large stature it is just as silent and sneaky as its smaller brethren. Constructed by similar dark rituals found in powerful fiends tomes, fey scribblings or arcane manuscripts. Your players could potentially learn to summon one… although the prospect is not without risk.
I would personally allow my players to summon a Granderhobb if they must battle a powerful spellcaster… like a [Bog Hag](https://www.reddit.com/r/monsteraday/comments/642dpi/day_30_bog_hag/)... if they’re successful then they have an ally for the combat. If not, well, they could end up fighting an angry Granderhobb and maybe a few Banderhobbs too!
The ritual should include finding an old tome or manuscript, then passing a few difficult arcana checks, arranging a ritual circle, gathering some rare ingredients, preparing some other spells like protection from evil and magic circle and finally some more arcana and concentration checks, maybe even have the other party members do some performance or knowledge checks to help too. If the party pass enough checks, lets say more than five checks out of eight, then they’re successful. It’s very 4e Skill Encounter, but it works.
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The Silverback Girallon is the Patriarch of a pack of Girallon. Inspiring its pack against the effects of magic that might deter them from a fight, and able to command them with its mighty roar, the Silverback is always a prime specimen of a creature.
Some Silverback’s ascend to leadership through use of their intellect rather than their brawn, however even the more scrawny Girallon is still a force to be reckoned with.
This would be just a run of the mill random encounter for anyone over level 10, but a decent set piece for anyone under it. *This is technically deadly for CR 10, but as the Silverback’s death causes the rest to flee, it’s not quite as tough as it initially looks.*
As the adventurers traverse a jungle-like environment known to be home to the Girallon they stray a little too close to Girallon territory. Ask for a group perception check from your adventurers, and measure that against the Silverback’s stealth check (+6). Alternatively just measure up the adventurers’ passive perception against the Silverback’s passive stealth (16).
If the adventurers identify they’re being tracked by a pack of Girallon with their perception, they then have two choices. Continue on into the Girallon’s territory, or find an alternative route. Should they realise and alter their route, they’ve defeated the encounter, as they’re not going to cause the Girallon to defend their territory, perhaps if they get into trouble the Silverback Girallon might even rush to their aid against a mutual foe, as it has taken the adventurers’ actions as a sign of respect for its domain.
Alternatively if the adventurers wander in blindly, the Girallon attack from the trees. The Girallon look to ambush the party and gain a surprise round, in the surprise round if they achieve one, the four Girallon attack but the Alpha remains hidden, choosing to act at the end of the initiative when all the Girallon are in position. If the adventurers attempt diplomacy the Girallon stop attacking and the Silverback Girallon observes, although it has no language if the adventurers can communicate with it somehow it will listen to reason as it’s only motivation is to protect the territory. If the adventurers manage to communicate, and understand they’re intruding and are willing to leave, the Girallon let them.
If communication fails or is not attempted, then the Silverback moves in, attacking whichever adventurer it has deemed a priority target. It uses it’s multiattack in the first round of combat, providing an ally Girallon has moved into a position where it is useful.
The Girallon flee if the Silverback falls, returning to their young and remaining pack members, they seek shelter from the invading adventurers.
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The feathers of a Nightmare Harpy are said to reflect an observer's deepest fear, be this the Harpy’s sorcery, or a natural oil that the harpy excretes from their skin that coats their feathers, is the subject of much debate. The Nightmare Harpy only concerns itself with causing fear, chaos, and pain. Once a victim has been thoroughly tortured and/or killed only then will it collect trophies and prizes.
Hags often slay the Nightmare Harpy for its feathers, to concoct powerful fear charms and potions; rumour has it cloaks adorned with many feathers, preserved and enchanted well enough, will grant the wearer the Harpy’s aura of fear, and advantage on saving throws against the frightened condition.
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Wildlife Correspondent and Hunter Extraordinaire, Sir Hunter Von Huntington III has finally resurfaced, after nearly 8 weeks tracking the mighty Prismhawk in its natural habitat.
“What ho, Adventurers. This task is surely evidence that one doesn’t have to go plane shifting, or wandering far and wide, to find something new and challenging.
We passed through a town called Frampt, at the base of High Farroth, the largest mountain nearby. With its snow-capped peak, high altitude, and inaccessibility, I was sure that we might find a Prismhawk up there. Frampt coincidently was a farming town, specialising in pigs for their annual sausage festival, so food was abundant.
We set out to scale the mountain, myself and Nergalee. While she approved of my pursuit of these lesser elemental hawks, she hadn’t expressed an interest in joining me. This task however, piqued her interest, and she sought to evidence the existence of this being not just by my eyes, but her own too.
The mountain was treacherous. It was as if it was actively resisting our advance, and it took us a full day to see any progress whatsoever. The ascent was slow, we had to stop and rest frequently. Nergalee adapted to the situation, spending most of her time as a mountain goat. I could have gotten uppity, her using her magic to make her progress easier, but I kept reminding myself that she was showing me consideration, since she could simply fly to the peak and be done with it.
It took a whole week for us to near the peak of High Farroth. We established a base camp, and started our search. It didn’t take long for us to catch our first glimpse of the creature, as the view was magnificent, and clear in almost all directions. The golden glinting, and prismatic refractions we glimpsed in the far distance, a sign that my intuition was correct, and High Farroth was indeed home to at least one Prismhawk.
It took almost another whole week of mapping, tracking, and keen eyes to find the nest of the creature, in a crevice, inaccessible by any means other than flight or extremely dangerous rappelling over jagged rocks. And there it was. A Prismhawk nest. A sight to behold, the nest was made of twigs, sticks, grass, and I swear enough treasure to rival a dragon’s horde. There was even evidence, Nergalee tells me, of an egg, long hatched, but still there.
And now, why i’ve been gone for a while.
In hindsight, with the mountaintop as devoid of life as it was, I should have known the Prismhawks were aware of our presence. But I was so eager to find these creatures, I got ahead of myself. While Nergalee and I were investigating the nest, the family returned. Mother, Father, and Fledgling “chick”. I say “chick” since despite clearly being the youngest, the creature was around the size of a cow.
There was a whistling noise, then a rumble, and then the top of the outcrop began to crumble on top of us. Before Nergalee or I had time to react, the ground beneath us opened in a great fissure and we began to fall. It was Nergalee’s quick thinking that saved us, as we fell, she turned into a great eagle, and grabbed me in her talon. She did her best to dodge the falling debris, but it felt like the entire mountain was collapsing on us. Her reactions were only so good, and eventually a large stone clipped her wing, and we began to free fall. Seemingly for an age, we fell. Nergalee wrapped her wings around me as best she could, to protect me from the impact that we knew was coming.
It felt like a torturously long time, then suddenly the worked stone ground rose to meet us, and we crashed into it with such force i thought us both surely dead. Nergalee’s ageless form, no longer an eagle, lay unconscious before me, but miraculously I seemed unscathed (I must give thanks to Gaerdal Ironhand now i’m back in civilization). I frantically search our packs for a healing kit, or anything I could use to treat Nergalee. I sometimes wonder if Nergalee has premonitions, or maybe magic that she hasn’t told us about, that lets her forsee the future. As I searched her pack, she had a selection of healing potions. Got to love that Elf! I picked the biggest, most elegant bottle and poured the liquid into her mouth. She roused almost immediately and I just had to give her a hearty handshake of thanks. She slipped back into unconsciousness almost as quickly, but at least I knew she was alive.
I knew she’d need to sleep this off, so I took the opportunity to make safe the surrounding area, and investigate where we were. It was only now that I realised the horrible stench. It was like a combination of sewage, rotten meat, and death. That doesn’t do it justice, but I can’t think of any other way to put it into words. The room looked ruined, a broken altar, evidence of a fight, skeletal remains of creatures of all shapes and sizes. The room wasn’t particularly impressive, other than the smell.
And this is where we stayed. It took Nergalee around a day to regain consciousness, and another few before she felt well enough to move. We wandered the ruins for days, looking for an exit. Rubble blocked every path we could find. Weeks into our imprisonment, we thought we were making progress when we found a shaft of some kind, leading down. With no clear way to descend, and most of our climbing gear still resting on the mountaintop, we had to improvise. Nergalee, as a nimble ape, carried me precariously down the shaft, a long, long way. Clearly we were in the very heart of the mountain down here. All the while, the smell was getting worse and worse. Indescribable pungence met us as we reached the bottom of the shaft, evidence of the wreckage of a lift of some kind. And before us was evidently the source of the smell. The remains of some creature, long dead, but still seemingly rotting, and just getting more ripe with age. Now as hardy as I am, I wouldn’t normally admit this, but the smell made me sick. Physically sick. You could taste it in the air, feel it in your eyes, you could even feel the smell on your skin, it hung so thickly in the air. I’m not proud but I was sick for a good, long time.
Once composure was regained, and as much cloth as could be spared had been used to cover our faces while still allowing us to breathe, we explored. There was a rough path toward the back of the cavern, but 20 or 30 feet down it the roof had collapsed and it was full of earth. This was the most promising find yet, since we could actually move earth!
So this was how we eventually got out. Nergalee demonstrated her burrowing powers and the wondrous magic at her disposal, while i went pick and shovel against the obstruction. I don’t know how long it took us, though I suspect it was another few weeks of digging shifts, to clear a path out of the godforsaken mountain.
And so, It was brief, but we did confirm the existence and description of the Prismhawk. But what we confirmed more is exactly why Nergalee is the Guildmaster. Without a thought she sacrificed herself to save me, and without her magical goodberries, we would have surely starved to death in that ruin.
The Prismhawk should be regarded with the utmost caution, they clearly were unperturbed by us investigating their presence, but when we invaded their nest, they nearly killed us both. You have been warned!”
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
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Today’s monster is the Crown-weaver Spider.
The Argiope Coronam has come to be called the Crown-weaver spider because Argiope Coronam is hard to remember and the Crown-weaver’s venom inflicts a similar effect to the spell Crown of Madness.
The spider appears like many others, seemingly harmless, tiny household spider; it’s true nature is revealed however, when you see the underbelly of the spider. Red and purple markings near the creature's venom sacs indicate the arachnid’s potent venom. A trained eye may also notice the more delicate needle-like fangs.
The intent is for this spider to be used alongside some drow, or regular spiders to sew havoc, to have an ally seemingly bewitched and violent, and for the cause not to be some invisible or hidden wizard, but in fact hiding on the body of your ally, fiendishly difficult to spot but easy to remove.
I for one recommend hiding a few of these in a bucket along with a swarm of spiders…. And then trapping a hallway to drop the bucket on an adventurer that fails to notice the traps trigger. That’s sure to incite some groans at the table, as the thought of being covered in spiders doesn’t appeal to many, and they may perceive the first few attacks as the character’s attempt to rid themselves of the spider swarm about their person.
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Today’s monster is the Stone Giant Colossus Hunter.
The Stone Giant Hunters are outliers from Stone Giant culture. Typically left as peripheral guardians, this sect of Stone Giants have taken it upon themselves to try and earn their way back into the “inner sanctum” through presentation of great trophies and plentiful resources.
Each giant creates their own bow and arrows. These colossal bows stand up to 30 feet tall, with arrows the width of fence posts, also some 15 foot long. A typical calculation of Mighty Bow length is one-and-a-half times the Giant’s own height, with arrows 1- or 2-feet longer than the draw distance of the bow. Due to the great size of the weapon and its ammunition, the giants do not carry an abundance of them, and once they have expended their ammunition they will temporarily abandon their bow in favour of their large axes that also serve as tools for the felling of trees.
Due to their neutral nature and lack of concern in the outside world (considering it to be a dream-like place of no consequence or danger), Stone Giant hunters don’t show fear in the face of even the mightiest of foes, and are often approachable, as they simply do not see any creature outside of their own race as a threat.
The counter side of this is a Giant who feels they have been wronged can also switch from amiable to hostile in a split-second, unhindered by concern of consequence, they may offhandedly insult someone, brush them aside, or kill them, with little motivation.
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Today’s monster is the Plague Wyvern.
Plague wyverns are created by followers of Gods such as Yurtrus and Incabulos. They capture and torture the wyverns with poisons and diseases, both magical and mundane. Arguably the most abhorrent part of the process is the removal of the wyvern’s stinger.
A variation of the wyvern, this creature could be used to bolster the ranks of a cult, an environmental encounter that indicates the presence of such nearby cults, or even a plot hook to seek a cure for the once noble or noble-adjacent creature.
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Today’s monster is the Stag Knight.
No, this is not Robert Baratheon, this is a leather-clad Satyr that has made a pact with the Lord of the Hunt. This is a creature that lives for the thrill of the hunt, for excitement or one sort or another. A fearsome warrior and a worrisome hedonist.
Typically adorned in leather armours, a helmet that exposes their horns and scantily clad in green and brown cloth. The Stag Knight is a unique silhouette on the battlefield. The Satyr’s typically ram-like horns become twisted and elongated like those of a stag, their length and size a testament to the length of time they have loyally served the Lord of the Hunt.
With their fabled pact weapons they are able to snare their quarry and allow the Wild Hunt time to close in and capture their prey. Any hunting party isn’t really a party until the Stag Knight arrives.
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Today’s monster is the Xanmu.
The Xanmu is a green-eyed monster. It is the demonic embodiment of envy, and as such it wants what you have. Ugly, swollen and green, its few arms and many eyes are unsettling to look upon as it attempts to wrestle your possessions out of your hands.
In the true spirit of envy, once a Xanmu has acquired something it wants, it will rapidly become bored and unsatisfied, choosing to either drop it, or throw it at its previous owner.
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Today’s monster is the Mime.
Mimes are mysterious entertainers, although often the subject of ridicule or annoyance a truly excellent mime can amaze and bewitch an audience with their performance. Those elite mimes are often inducted into a college of the arts that lies somewhere between illusion and conjuration. Some say this is the shadow weave, some believe it is faith and others swear they can see the wires, smoke and mirrors that expose the mime as a fraudster.
A mime can be a friend or a foe to any adventuring party.
If you choose foe, then consider this; The party have been hired to protect a noble at a large event, the party do not know who a potential assassin may be, so they must prepare the event’s security. The mime will attempt to conjure a weapon and attack the noble, using his performance and deception skills to ensure it is a surprise. Regardless of how successful the attack is, the mime will probably need to use his skills to escape, blocking doors with wall of force, or using a prop ladder to gain height and using his walls to stay aloft or bridge the gap from building to building.
If you choose friend, the perhaps the mime can assist the party scale a sheer cliff’s edge. By conjuring his walls as steps he can slowly ascend any wall five foot at a time, however the party must come up with some clever method to ensure they don’t fall, whether it is using their natural dexterity and speed or perhaps covering the wall segments in dirt so the party can see them it is up to you. If the mime’s stairs stray too close to a giant eagles nest and territory the great beast will surely attack, the party should endeavour to protect the mime as if his concentration drops… so will they all.
That being said, negotiations or conversations with a mime are tough, often devolving into a game of charades. This can be an interesting way to communicate in character for a DM, but if your players really aren’t getting it, allow their characters an insight check to decrypt your clues.
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Today’s monster is the Landu.
The Landu is the demonic embodiment of sloth. Similar in many ways to a large slug, it has a great gaping mouth that is half the circumference of its body, two droopy eyes, and it propels itself, albeit slowly, with four very short legs.
The Landu exudes an aura that slows the reactions of those nearby, and can also cause them to lose the will to move or fight. Its gaping maw, when yawning, can slow its enemies, and its favoured form of offence is to sit on and suffocate adversaries.
Easy to outrun, but so abhorrent you want to kill it. Decisions, decisions. Perhaps it can wait until tomorrow.
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Today’s monster is the Pigasus.
The origin of the Pigasus is a petty one, a mage with a penchant for gambling was owed quite the sum of money but the debt was ignored with spite, “When pigs fly!”.
The young mage then turned to his studies, taking the idiom literally. His research of pigs and winged creatures coming to a head with the pegasus. After months of work he was able to conjure a purebreed pigasus, the first of it’s kind. When he confronted his gambling companion astride a flying pig, the speechless degenerate was quick to pay.
Once the pigasus was created, things got out of hand. They became popular, and specialist breeders became pigasus experts, breeding flying mounts, corrupting pigasus into demonic hell-boars, domesticating them for house pets and raising them on farms for flying pork and bacon.
A sample encounter for four level 6 players. *Difficulty Medium, Total XP: 1,500, Adjusted XP: 3,000*
Three Dretches atop Three Hell-Boar Pigasi
Read to your players, three Dretches appear on the horizon, they appear to be moving quickly. As the Dretches come over the hill they appear to be mounted atop demonic looking warthogs with black feathered wings. They leap into the air and take flight, the Dretches ready their weapons, small white spheres, packed snow.
That’s right, three demons on flying pigs chucking snowballs. Roll initiative.
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Today’s monster is the Ahuizotl.
A mythical creature of Aztec / Mesoamerican culture, the Ahuizotl is a small, dog-like being that ambushes fishermen from the water. It is said to have black fur, either smooth or spiked, four legs of which the front two may end in humanoid hands, and a tail that has a humanoid hand at the end.
Anything that approaches the water’s edge or spends to long in the depths runs the risk of becoming the Ahuizotl’s prey. It will ambush those unaware of it, and attempt to drag them to the depths to drown.
A wasteful creature, the Ahuizotl’s preferred food is eyes, nails and teeth, leaving the rest of the corpse to eventually float back to the surface of its watery domain.
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Today’s monster is the Silent Knight.
Similar to the Stag Knight, this high ranking Fey is a loyal servant of a Fey court.
Known for their ability to monopolise sound, they are experts in stealth despite their heavy armour. Once engaged in combat however they become thunderous forces of nature, using deafening sounds to disorient and damage their foes with their Thundering steps and Thundermauls. It is said the Lady of Twilight does not wish for her enemies to see her Knights coming, but she wants all to hear them arrive.
A Silent Knight is a deadly merchant of death, but more importantly they hold a position of necessity in the Twilight court. Answering only to the Lady of Twilight and the Knight of Twilight themselves. Upon death their armour and weaponry evaporate into light and sound before returning to their Lady, waiting to be bestowed upon a worthy successor.
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Today’s monsters are the 1d6 Barbarians. Looks like we rolled a 3.
We thought we’d try something a little different with today’s monsters. With so many archetypes for so many different classes, there are some slightly more obscure builds that might be overlooked or maybe even unheard of. We decided to build some NPCs of varying levels and varying non-core archetypes to showcase their differences, and so that you can simply “drag and drop” them into your own campaign setting should the need arise.
Barbarians are mighty warriors, but they come in all shapes and sizes, tapping into a deep fury to enhance their already impressive strength. Be it a member of the town guard with anger issues, a savage warrior of the badlands or just the rudest gnome who has ever challenged you to an arm wrestling match, all of these character concepts have one thing in common; They are as adept at dealing damage as they are at taking it, and they look pretty bad-ass whilst doing so.
So, here’s a few of our character concepts;
A Dwarf whose inherited weapon is a conduit of its revered ancestors. These spiritual guardians guide and protect the party.
A Dragonborn of a desert tribe, who harnesses the elemental fury of the burning sands to incinerate foes and shield friends.
A Half-orc legend amongst berserkers, knowing only war they are zealous fury personified, seeking glorious death, be it their own or others.
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Today’s monsters is the Cacus.
Roman Mythology says that when a Cacus stole cattle from Heracles, Heracles took it upon himself to slay the monster. A battle of boulder and tree throwing occurred until Heracles dug through the top of the mountain where the Cacus lived, jumped into the centre of the smoke, and strangled the Cacus to death.
Whether or not you choose to believe that a single man defeated a Cacus, and didn’t just get eaten, the Cacus do pose a very real threat. Extremely angry giants, they leave a gory mural around the entrance to their home to ward off invaders.
With a hatred burning so fiercely inside them they can actually blow smoke and fire, these Giants should be treated with just as much caution as any Dragon.
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Today’s monsters is the Storm Giant Water-Bearer.
These reclusive Storm Giants are sometimes referred to as Sea Giants, or Ocean Titans. They stand anywhere from twenty five to thirty feet tall, with light green skin, dark green hair and eyes. Although their skin becomes mottled with barnacles and lichen, their hair becomes webbed or tangled with seaweed, and their eyes become lighter, taking on the depth of the ocean. They tend to adorn themselves in clothes made from the sails of ships, these sails can be from sunken wrecks, or the giant may attack a ship that strays too close to their homes. Trinkets such as anchors, a ship’s wheel or netting and rigging are used as jewellery and adornments.
Water-bearers are granted their name as they carry an Urn of water with them. It is from this spiritual and physical connection to water they derive their wisdom and physical skill. Each morning a water-bearer will refill their urn using whatever source they have available, or using their ability to control the weather and summon a rainstorm if there is no water source available. They then purify this water, creating potable water. After a year and a day of these rituals the urn becomes magical in itself, and gives off an aura of purity, although the water-bearer will continue the ritual regardless.
Should you wish to represent a water-bearer that is less than a year into their training, take away the aura and their raging waves stance, also adjust the lightning surge to recharge on 6 rather than 5-6. The challenge rating will remain the same however.
Water-bearers are hermit-like martial arts masters, perhaps a party member could convince one to take them on as a pupil but this is rare, such as with the Hobgoblin Stoneclaw.
It is more likely that a Water-bearer will either serve as an ally, with knowledge the party desire or the ability to scry upon someone for the party. Alternatively as an antagonist, with the party needing to visit the water-bearer’s underwater home or island. They are very territorial giants, but can always be reasoned with as long as the party hasn’t done too much to offend them.
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Today’s monster is the Yeti Abomination.
A Yeti Abomination is an abominable Yeti that has been corrupted and twisted into an aberration. These savages are more feral and ferocious than their already abominable counterparts. With dark grey, matted and oft bloodstained fur, dark black twisted horns, eyes instilled with rage and crooked black fangs these creatures are dangerous and it is not advised to attempt diplomacy.
Corruption may be the result of a dark ritual, captured Yetis that are twisted to the will of evil gods. It may be a result of insidious and ancient magics in a desecrated temple or a malicious power taking root in the mind of the Yeti and slowly turning the creature into an instrument of death. It is also possible that a naturally aggressive Abominable Yeti could devote itself to malevolent forces in order to satiate an overwhelming bloodlust and be “blessed” with this transformation.
Regardless of the reason, these dangerous creations are often found guarding forbidden places, due to their territorial nature, or used as inconsiderate assassins, overwhelming entire winter caravans to achieve their goals.
Sample Encounter for 4 level 8-11 players; **The Chilled Convoy** *Total XP: 18,400*
1 Yeti Abominations
2 Abominable Yetis
The convoy is transporting leathers, silks, preserved food and various trinkets. Every turn the convoy guards deal 22 (4d10) damage to the Yetis if the adventurers intervene, the caravan is destroyed after 1d12+6 rounds at which point they stop damaging the Yetis. If they choose not to intervene then the yetis destroy the caravan in 1d10+4 rounds.
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Today’s monster is the Lynching Tree.
The Lynching Tree was a once ordinary tree. Over many years, subjected to cruel and heinous acts in its boughs, it has grown to hate humanoids, the beings capable of such inhumanity towards one another.
Infused with the souls of the innocents that have been killed in its boughs, and presuming the worst of any humanoids that approach it, the Lynching Tree will try and preemptively hang and strangle any who approach. It can also unleash a scream made by the spirits of the innocent souls, psychically assaulting those nearby.
A couple of examples of how a Lynching Tree could be used:
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Today’s monsters are the 1d6 Bards, and we rolled another 3.
Bards are crafty spellcasters, often thought of as lofty musicians, strumming a lute whilst bringing some arcane energy to the battlefield. A bard is often the face of a party, persuading folk into giving up some more information, or haggling down the blacksmith’s prices. All tried and true, but not everyone has to fit into the tradition.
Bards can be leaders; a pirate captain with a penchant for exploration, adventure and the freedom of the open sea. Bards can be thieves, with their expertise of sleight of hand and thieves’ tools added to their natural confidence and hustling. Bards can be nobles, inspiring their court and subjects.
So, here’s a few of our character concepts;
A Tiefling taught magic by pixies, after being shunned by a society that rejects tiefling-kind, this tiefling embraced their otherworldly nature, but not in a malicious sense.
A Half-elven warrior, raised by a human soldier their skill with weapons and armour is significant, but the latent magic of their elven bloodline shines through. A natural leader this sergeant inspires and leads his troops from the front.
A Halfling diplomat, using his skill and position to gather information and sell it to the highest bidder, usually neighbouring kingdoms. Able to create scandal through the assassination and subsequent impersonation of key individuals, although for this he often has to use potions of enlargement.
Personally I believe our whispering diplomat to be an excellent villain in a more social game, although the swords sargeant is the easiest to drop in as a rival, ally or foe.
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Today’s monster is the Granderhobb.
The Granderhobb is a more powerful Banderhobb that has specialised in the kidnapping of spellcasters or those who would use magical items to escape it’s stomach. It’s antimagic belly shuts down many magical escape options. As such the Granderhobb is the minion of choice for spats between hags, or to trap a wizard.
Creatures of shadow and flesh, despite the Granderhobb’s large stature it is just as silent and sneaky as its smaller brethren. Constructed by similar dark rituals found in powerful fiends tomes, fey scribblings or arcane manuscripts. Your players could potentially learn to summon one… although the prospect is not without risk.
I would personally allow my players to summon a Granderhobb if they must battle a powerful spellcaster… like a [Bog Hag](https://www.reddit.com/r/monsteraday/comments/642dpi/day_30_bog_hag/)... if they’re successful then they have an ally for the combat. If not, well, they could end up fighting an angry Granderhobb and maybe a few Banderhobbs too!
The ritual should include finding an old tome or manuscript, then passing a few difficult arcana checks, arranging a ritual circle, gathering some rare ingredients, preparing some other spells like protection from evil and magic circle and finally some more arcana and concentration checks, maybe even have the other party members do some performance or knowledge checks to help too. If the party pass enough checks, lets say more than five checks out of eight, then they’re successful. It’s very 4e Skill Encounter, but it works.
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Today’s monster is the Silverback Girallon.
The Silverback Girallon is the Patriarch of a pack of Girallon. Inspiring its pack against the effects of magic that might deter them from a fight, and able to command them with its mighty roar, the Silverback is always a prime specimen of a creature.
Some Silverback’s ascend to leadership through use of their intellect rather than their brawn, however even the more scrawny Girallon is still a force to be reckoned with.
Sample Encounter; 1 Silverback Girallon, 4 Girallon
Total XP: 6,700
Adjusted XP: 13,400
This would be just a run of the mill random encounter for anyone over level 10, but a decent set piece for anyone under it. *This is technically deadly for CR 10, but as the Silverback’s death causes the rest to flee, it’s not quite as tough as it initially looks.*
As the adventurers traverse a jungle-like environment known to be home to the Girallon they stray a little too close to Girallon territory. Ask for a group perception check from your adventurers, and measure that against the Silverback’s stealth check (+6). Alternatively just measure up the adventurers’ passive perception against the Silverback’s passive stealth (16).
If the adventurers identify they’re being tracked by a pack of Girallon with their perception, they then have two choices. Continue on into the Girallon’s territory, or find an alternative route. Should they realise and alter their route, they’ve defeated the encounter, as they’re not going to cause the Girallon to defend their territory, perhaps if they get into trouble the Silverback Girallon might even rush to their aid against a mutual foe, as it has taken the adventurers’ actions as a sign of respect for its domain.
Alternatively if the adventurers wander in blindly, the Girallon attack from the trees. The Girallon look to ambush the party and gain a surprise round, in the surprise round if they achieve one, the four Girallon attack but the Alpha remains hidden, choosing to act at the end of the initiative when all the Girallon are in position. If the adventurers attempt diplomacy the Girallon stop attacking and the Silverback Girallon observes, although it has no language if the adventurers can communicate with it somehow it will listen to reason as it’s only motivation is to protect the territory. If the adventurers manage to communicate, and understand they’re intruding and are willing to leave, the Girallon let them.
If communication fails or is not attempted, then the Silverback moves in, attacking whichever adventurer it has deemed a priority target. It uses it’s multiattack in the first round of combat, providing an ally Girallon has moved into a position where it is useful.
The Girallon flee if the Silverback falls, returning to their young and remaining pack members, they seek shelter from the invading adventurers.
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Today’s monster is the Nightmare Harpy.
The feathers of a Nightmare Harpy are said to reflect an observer's deepest fear, be this the Harpy’s sorcery, or a natural oil that the harpy excretes from their skin that coats their feathers, is the subject of much debate. The Nightmare Harpy only concerns itself with causing fear, chaos, and pain. Once a victim has been thoroughly tortured and/or killed only then will it collect trophies and prizes.
Hags often slay the Nightmare Harpy for its feathers, to concoct powerful fear charms and potions; rumour has it cloaks adorned with many feathers, preserved and enchanted well enough, will grant the wearer the Harpy’s aura of fear, and advantage on saving throws against the frightened condition.
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Today’s monster is the Prismhawk.
Wildlife Correspondent and Hunter Extraordinaire, Sir Hunter Von Huntington III has finally resurfaced, after nearly 8 weeks tracking the mighty Prismhawk in its natural habitat.
“What ho, Adventurers. This task is surely evidence that one doesn’t have to go plane shifting, or wandering far and wide, to find something new and challenging.
We passed through a town called Frampt, at the base of High Farroth, the largest mountain nearby. With its snow-capped peak, high altitude, and inaccessibility, I was sure that we might find a Prismhawk up there. Frampt coincidently was a farming town, specialising in pigs for their annual sausage festival, so food was abundant.
We set out to scale the mountain, myself and Nergalee. While she approved of my pursuit of these lesser elemental hawks, she hadn’t expressed an interest in joining me. This task however, piqued her interest, and she sought to evidence the existence of this being not just by my eyes, but her own too.
The mountain was treacherous. It was as if it was actively resisting our advance, and it took us a full day to see any progress whatsoever. The ascent was slow, we had to stop and rest frequently. Nergalee adapted to the situation, spending most of her time as a mountain goat. I could have gotten uppity, her using her magic to make her progress easier, but I kept reminding myself that she was showing me consideration, since she could simply fly to the peak and be done with it.
It took a whole week for us to near the peak of High Farroth. We established a base camp, and started our search. It didn’t take long for us to catch our first glimpse of the creature, as the view was magnificent, and clear in almost all directions. The golden glinting, and prismatic refractions we glimpsed in the far distance, a sign that my intuition was correct, and High Farroth was indeed home to at least one Prismhawk.
It took almost another whole week of mapping, tracking, and keen eyes to find the nest of the creature, in a crevice, inaccessible by any means other than flight or extremely dangerous rappelling over jagged rocks. And there it was. A Prismhawk nest. A sight to behold, the nest was made of twigs, sticks, grass, and I swear enough treasure to rival a dragon’s horde. There was even evidence, Nergalee tells me, of an egg, long hatched, but still there.
And now, why i’ve been gone for a while.
In hindsight, with the mountaintop as devoid of life as it was, I should have known the Prismhawks were aware of our presence. But I was so eager to find these creatures, I got ahead of myself. While Nergalee and I were investigating the nest, the family returned. Mother, Father, and Fledgling “chick”. I say “chick” since despite clearly being the youngest, the creature was around the size of a cow.
There was a whistling noise, then a rumble, and then the top of the outcrop began to crumble on top of us. Before Nergalee or I had time to react, the ground beneath us opened in a great fissure and we began to fall. It was Nergalee’s quick thinking that saved us, as we fell, she turned into a great eagle, and grabbed me in her talon. She did her best to dodge the falling debris, but it felt like the entire mountain was collapsing on us. Her reactions were only so good, and eventually a large stone clipped her wing, and we began to free fall. Seemingly for an age, we fell. Nergalee wrapped her wings around me as best she could, to protect me from the impact that we knew was coming.
It felt like a torturously long time, then suddenly the worked stone ground rose to meet us, and we crashed into it with such force i thought us both surely dead. Nergalee’s ageless form, no longer an eagle, lay unconscious before me, but miraculously I seemed unscathed (I must give thanks to Gaerdal Ironhand now i’m back in civilization). I frantically search our packs for a healing kit, or anything I could use to treat Nergalee. I sometimes wonder if Nergalee has premonitions, or maybe magic that she hasn’t told us about, that lets her forsee the future. As I searched her pack, she had a selection of healing potions. Got to love that Elf! I picked the biggest, most elegant bottle and poured the liquid into her mouth. She roused almost immediately and I just had to give her a hearty handshake of thanks. She slipped back into unconsciousness almost as quickly, but at least I knew she was alive.
I knew she’d need to sleep this off, so I took the opportunity to make safe the surrounding area, and investigate where we were. It was only now that I realised the horrible stench. It was like a combination of sewage, rotten meat, and death. That doesn’t do it justice, but I can’t think of any other way to put it into words. The room looked ruined, a broken altar, evidence of a fight, skeletal remains of creatures of all shapes and sizes. The room wasn’t particularly impressive, other than the smell.
And this is where we stayed. It took Nergalee around a day to regain consciousness, and another few before she felt well enough to move. We wandered the ruins for days, looking for an exit. Rubble blocked every path we could find. Weeks into our imprisonment, we thought we were making progress when we found a shaft of some kind, leading down. With no clear way to descend, and most of our climbing gear still resting on the mountaintop, we had to improvise. Nergalee, as a nimble ape, carried me precariously down the shaft, a long, long way. Clearly we were in the very heart of the mountain down here. All the while, the smell was getting worse and worse. Indescribable pungence met us as we reached the bottom of the shaft, evidence of the wreckage of a lift of some kind. And before us was evidently the source of the smell. The remains of some creature, long dead, but still seemingly rotting, and just getting more ripe with age. Now as hardy as I am, I wouldn’t normally admit this, but the smell made me sick. Physically sick. You could taste it in the air, feel it in your eyes, you could even feel the smell on your skin, it hung so thickly in the air. I’m not proud but I was sick for a good, long time.
Once composure was regained, and as much cloth as could be spared had been used to cover our faces while still allowing us to breathe, we explored. There was a rough path toward the back of the cavern, but 20 or 30 feet down it the roof had collapsed and it was full of earth. This was the most promising find yet, since we could actually move earth!
So this was how we eventually got out. Nergalee demonstrated her burrowing powers and the wondrous magic at her disposal, while i went pick and shovel against the obstruction. I don’t know how long it took us, though I suspect it was another few weeks of digging shifts, to clear a path out of the godforsaken mountain.
And so, It was brief, but we did confirm the existence and description of the Prismhawk. But what we confirmed more is exactly why Nergalee is the Guildmaster. Without a thought she sacrificed herself to save me, and without her magical goodberries, we would have surely starved to death in that ruin.
The Prismhawk should be regarded with the utmost caution, they clearly were unperturbed by us investigating their presence, but when we invaded their nest, they nearly killed us both. You have been warned!”
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