One of our craziest happened with a boss fight that ended with 3 npcs including the boss just disappearing. One of which was implied to be a dying god. We went into the next room and found the portal that the creature had exited, and before anyone could say anything my (now completely insane character, from tons of failed saves) jumped into the portal and discovered a lot about this other realm. Got chased by something that I couldn't see and exited. Relayed the info, then overheard that the portal might be able to be closed with divine magic, so I used max level smite and blew up the church we were in, nearly killing the entire party.
One of my favorites I call my Maury Povich session. The party met an NPC who's help they needed. But he couldn't help because of this drama with an ex-lover. The only reason he could think of that she would be so mad at him is because he lost an amulet she gave him in a card game. The party spent the whole session re-creating the amulet (their idea). Went to a bunch of shops, did some crafting and made a pretty good copy. They ended up with an 18 on their final roll.
So armed with the good copy they went with the NPC to present the amulet and try to win her back. After getting past her friend who answered the door with some smooth talking they finally get the ex to come out to the porch and talk. He presents her with the amulet and apologizes for loosing it. She looks at the amulet and says...
"You moron! You think this is about a stupid piece of jewelry, I"M PREGNANT!"
Our campaigns have been going back to when 5e was released. Some highlights:
In our Curse of Strahd game, we figured out how to keep Strahd from returning...ever. I cast Hallowed on his crypt so his minions couldn't save him. Then I used Stone Shape to make the inside of his sarcophagus pointy and sealed it shut. I put in a Blessed item we'd been carrying around forever. Oh, and I made the rider component of Hallowed that there could be no sound in the area. So, every 7-10 days (?) after he dies, Strahd is resurrected inside his sarcophagus where he takes damage from being on Hallowed ground and in the presence of a Blessed item. He can't regenerate because of the radiant damage, he can't cast Dispel because it has a verbal component and he's been silenced. So, he dies every week or ten days...over and over...
In our recent game, we were fighting a powerful Science Wizard (essentially an Artificer) from the Void Material Plane. He'd spread the idea around all of the Warforged he'd made that he was a god. We blew up the metal dragon he'd made by casting Flame Bolt into the aperture in his chest that was spewing a flammable oil every turn. Our Fighter/Rogue managed to put about 90 points of damage on the BBEG in one round and then the Barbarian and the Paladin did almost as much, each. It was one of those fights where you're losing...you're losing...hey, did we just win?
My all-time best con of my players was the time I made them believe they were dead. In order to enter a hidden temple and retrieve the Maguffin, they had to pass through a pitch-black portal. The Warlock sent his familiar in first and it promptly died. Believing that I wouldn't kill them outright, they all jumped through. They woke to find the NPC Cleric (an established friend who fed them missions), reviving them. He told them that he'd felt something wrong with the psychic connection he shared with them and he rushed to find them. He found them dead after several days of travel and tried to revive them. He wasn't powerful enough to bring them back fully but a gift they'd all received, one instance of Death Ward each, had preserved their souls. He'd brought them all back as Revenants so they could finish their mission. Necromantic damage would heal them but Healing would hurt. In the end, it was all a sham. The Cleric was an agent of the BBEG and he'd transformed them to all feel cold and lifeless and to drain the color from their skin. If anyone had actually tried a Healing spell, it would have worked and the jig would have been up.
To sum up a few without going overboard on details:
First, the party decided to free some animals. Then the warlock rode a wild rhino through some circus workers. Then the circus tent caught fire. Then the party fought (briefly) a recurring enemy, an Ettin artificer with heavy armour and twin greatswords. Then the party artificer/paladin nearly got eaten by a giant spider.
First, the party discovered that the monks mount could talk, for 24 hours. Then they all piled aboard a brothel-ship called the Incubus and Succubus. Then the Barbarian was pole dancing whilst a wizard cast grease on him. Then the warlock got drunk and ordered massages for the monk and the paladin, then passed out.
First, the party started the campaign, and entered the tavern to buy lodgings. Then this became one of the PCs parents tavern. Then I had to improvise an entire fighting pit scene because their parents tavern hosts fights. Then the Monk almost fell to the paladins dad, but won because the cleric dropped a chandelier on him. Then the session ended, having succeeded only in making it past the "you arrive in the town" line of my prep notes.
To sum up a few without going overboard on details:
First, the party decided to free some animals. Then the warlock rode a wild rhino through some circus workers. Then the circus tent caught fire. Then the party fought (briefly) a recurring enemy, an Ettin artificer with heavy armour and twin greatswords. Then the party artificer/paladin nearly got eaten by a giant spider.
First, the party discovered that the monks mount could talk, for 24 hours. Then they all piled aboard a brothel-ship called the Incubus and Succubus. Then the Barbarian was pole dancing whilst a wizard cast grease on him. Then the warlock got drunk and ordered massages for the monk and the paladin, then passed out.
First, the party started the campaign, and entered the tavern to buy lodgings. Then this became one of the PCs parents tavern. Then I had to improvise an entire fighting pit scene because their parents tavern hosts fights. Then the Monk almost fell to the paladins dad, but won because the cleric dropped a chandelier on him. Then the session ended, having succeeded only in making it past the "you arrive in the town" line of my prep notes.
What crazy or wild sessions have you had, where the weird and unexpected happen.
I was the DM and there were only two players that night so I rolled up three NPCs to help the party. They had ended the last session by escaping a zombie horde (100+) and ducking into a nearby building. It was a two story warehouse with technically a third story clearance making the building 30ft tall and 90ft squared. The bottom floor was empty but a wooden catwalk ringed the second floor where there was an office.
At the start of the session they realize on party member didn't make it inside and that there were two half-elves as well as a dwarf hiding inside the building. The party lied to the NPCs about some minor unimportant stuff for no reason other than to just lie and the dwarf NPC called the party out on their lie. Instead of just explaining it or doing what normal people would they go murderhobo and start attacking the NPCs. In the heat of the battle, which nearly killed them, they lit the warehouse on fire by accident. At the end of battle they realize that the place is burning down and zombies will break inside at any moment. I used a physical thirty minute hour glass to show how long they have until the building burns forcing them to rush through their turns and creating a sense of urgency.
The party bolted up the stairs then climbed the ladder up to the roof, which again is technically an additional story tall. They make it up and lock the trap door to the roof behind them. Running around the edge of the roof they realize the fire has brought more zombies over to their location and they lost both of their immovable rods as well as both of collapsible poles. No one has flying or levitate. The building is sill burning and the roof is starting to get weaker as they IRL have fifteen minutes left in the thirty minute hour glass. Hatching a plan they use their battleaxe as an improvised weapon after tying a rope to it. They toss it over across the 15ft wide street through a window of the fourth floor into the four story stone building next door. It took them two goes then secured itself as a makeshift grappling hook. They then proceeded to tie the other end of their rope to the trapdoor on the roof and began to climb across the gap on the rope.
One party member makes it just as the thirty minute hour glass runs put of sand and the roof gives way. The rope attached to the trapdoor goes slack with the other party member on the line. Only the battle axe used as a makeshift grappling hook keeps them from plummeting straight to their doom. The party member who made it across dives for the battle axe as it jumps from it's hold and passes his check to grab it. Meanwhile the other party member swings into the side of the stone building receiving a concussion and being knocked out. They fall but were tied off so they only fall so far until they are just out of reach of the zombie horde below.
Now the kicker is the party member who grabbed the axe and made it across was the weak one and also the one who had almost no gear on because they were the weak one and though it would be easier to climb across unencumbered. So, they gave everything to the party member who is now dead weight on the other end of this rope hanging out over a horde of zombies. The had to make an athletics check to draw them up, one for each story so two, but they kept succeeding and then failing so they made about eight checks. It was super tense and hilarious but eventually he got his party member to safety inside the building. Lucky for them the building was a bank and so while zombies had gotten inside they were all trapped being the barriers on the first floor. This building was impenetrable and it had sewer access so they could easily get in and out without much fuss from zombies.
They had a lot of fun. People always do in that campaign because no one ever expects for the environment to challenge their characters. It is always a trap or a monster but never just circumstances and natural obstacles like climbing. It is hard to make those more mundane checks fun, but as a DM when you do it really makes the entire campaign!
To sum up a few without going overboard on details:
First, the party decided to free some animals. Then the warlock rode a wild rhino through some circus workers. Then the circus tent caught fire. Then the party fought (briefly) a recurring enemy, an Ettin artificer with heavy armour and twin greatswords. Then the party artificer/paladin nearly got eaten by a giant spider.
First, the party discovered that the monks mount could talk, for 24 hours. Then they all piled aboard a brothel-ship called the Incubus and Succubus. Then the Barbarian was pole dancing whilst a wizard cast grease on him. Then the warlock got drunk and ordered massages for the monk and the paladin, then passed out.
First, the party started the campaign, and entered the tavern to buy lodgings. Then this became one of the PCs parents tavern. Then I had to improvise an entire fighting pit scene because their parents tavern hosts fights. Then the Monk almost fell to the paladins dad, but won because the cleric dropped a chandelier on him. Then the session ended, having succeeded only in making it past the "you arrive in the town" line of my prep notes.
Okay...the pole-dancing Barb sounds EPIC!
I neglected to mention that the entire session was Improv, because I had drawn a huge lake, with piers at both ends, between them and their goal, and did not (for whatever reason) anticipate them travelling by boat.
Today's was probably the wildest and most fun session I've ever run in my admittedly short career. For context I'm running Tomb of Annihilation and the level 3 (almost 4) party consisted of a tabaxi artificer with a panda steel defender, lizardfolk wizard, dwarf fighter, half-elf light cleric, and Azaka Stormfang the guide NPC.
I don't know how to mark for spoilers or spells or anything but there are a few spoilers in here if you're playing ToA. Read at your own risk.
We'd stopped last session just as Zalkoré (medusa queen who was tripping balls) sicced 3 eblis on them, so the party fights them first thing. The lizardfolk wizard had it in his head that he wanted to make "eblis noodle soup", and every turn he'd make a comment like "I will cook you into eblis noodle soup!" They were scared that after killing her eblis that Zalkoré was going to kill them next, but she just applaueded their skill and called for another eblis to bring in some (poisoned) fruit and wine. The dwarf fighter was still salty from the fight and tried to intimidate Z into giving up the thing that they came for in the first place (a rare flower for use in a ritual), however she rolled really low and Z turned to her hallucinatory boyfriend and said "Oh she's so funny love, we should keep her". This made the fighter grumpy but not enough to fight yet as no one wanted to get petrified.
We also had an entertaining moment where the cleric pretended to eat the poisoned fruit to keep Z happy, rubbing his stomach and saying how good it was. She tried to give him drugs, but he disposed of them less convincingly.
Highlight of the session was an epic natural 20 by the artificer to steal the flower and run for it, everyone crept out without alerting Z except for Azaka, their guide. She shoved the others out of the room and would have faced Z alone by virtue of being a weretiger, but the fighter and cleric convinced the others to go back and save her. Cue the epic battle with 2 near petrifications and liberal use of the Catapult spell by the artificer. They won, and I got to describe Z's ghostly boyfriend kneel before her body and sob silently before disappearing.
There was really crappy loot except for some of Z's leftover drugs, which the artificer took happily and the rest went to the cleric and wizard. Next session we're logging new abilities from a level-up and the artificer will make a gun. Looking forward to it for sure!
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Forever DM but I want to play at some point
I'm not very experienced with D&D Beyond, so sorry if I mess something up.
The setting: Someone in our party was challenged to a duel that was set at the same time as the ball, we did the duel on a large stage about a third of the size of the ballroom.
Classes: Ranger, Rogue, Druid (me), Fighter (my bestie who I lived on an island with after getting exiled from Olympus), Barbarian, Cleric (two of them)
I was chosen as Fighter's 2nd for this duel, somehow most everyone else got involved, except for the Barbarian and Ranger who were somewhere else (the players didn't show up that day) and one of our Clerics (in canon, they hated working with us, so they just watched from a table near to the stage) and the Rogue (who liked to mess with my character in every imaginable way possible, so she was at a different table).
It was set up as a tag-team thing, our opponent and his lackeys swapping with some monsters of my DM's own creation (evil bugger).
We're fighting, everything's going as normal as a duel in the Feywild could be, everyone attending the ball is watching at this point, including representatives of the Court of Beasts and Brutality and their human slaves (this is important info for later)..... then Evil Bugger releases his specially crafted monsters, one was a slimy and grotesque ooze and another was like an owlbear but Not, there was also a giant ostrich because why not. I realize as we're fighting these guys that the Ooze is really powerful and we're going to need help, so I use my beast-speech to convince the Ostrich to p*ss off (I actually made it have an existenstial crisis that made it realize that it's spent its whole life serving these a-holes, so it jumped off the stage and started to run outside to go find sanctuary in the nearby wood, which is when our Rogue decided to JUMP ON ITS BACK AND RIDE THE F*CKER, ACCIDENTALLY KILLING ONE OF THE COURT REPS AND MAIMING ANOTHER) and our other Cleric convinced the Not Owlbear to turn against Ooze. Ooze quickly kills Not Owlbear by literally ripping it in half at the waist and eating it. I see an opportunity and use a heightened Control Water spell to manipulate the blood of Dead Not Owlbear, exploding it and Ooze. We celebrate too early. Guy We're Dueling sends out some knight that died in his last duel against adventurers and sends him after Other Cleric. At this point, Dead Ooze is in three main pieces and now they're alive for some reason (dude's an effin' flatworm is what I'm thinking to myself) and now we have MORE monsters than before, so I use Mass Suggestion to seize the minds of the human slaves of the CoBnB Reps and make 'em fall in love with me (my character is a Nymph btw, so it's not like it's unreasonable) and fight for me, I make sure to tell them to get actual weapons tho. The majority of Human Slaves grabbed like sticks or knives or the occasional sword but this one dude named Leonard took it upon himself to get an effin' CIVIL WAR RIFLE which he f*ckin sucked with. With this new-found Human Infantry that I've acquired, two of the Ooze Remnants die (permanently this time) and Leonard shoots Other Cleric in the shoulder, lower back, and leg at different times while Other Cleric was fighting Zombie Knight (I defended my loyal marksman of course by saying that Other Cleric should've just moved-- despite being grappled by Zombie Knight at the time of being shot). The fight has been going on for a while at this point so I just use the Tidal Wave spell and we call it a day.
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What crazy or wild sessions have you had, where the weird and unexpected happen.
Soon to be DM.
Currently in a homebrew post-apocalyptic game.
One of our craziest happened with a boss fight that ended with 3 npcs including the boss just disappearing. One of which was implied to be a dying god. We went into the next room and found the portal that the creature had exited, and before anyone could say anything my (now completely insane character, from tons of failed saves) jumped into the portal and discovered a lot about this other realm. Got chased by something that I couldn't see and exited. Relayed the info, then overheard that the portal might be able to be closed with divine magic, so I used max level smite and blew up the church we were in, nearly killing the entire party.
One of my favorites I call my Maury Povich session. The party met an NPC who's help they needed. But he couldn't help because of this drama with an ex-lover. The only reason he could think of that she would be so mad at him is because he lost an amulet she gave him in a card game. The party spent the whole session re-creating the amulet (their idea). Went to a bunch of shops, did some crafting and made a pretty good copy. They ended up with an 18 on their final roll.
So armed with the good copy they went with the NPC to present the amulet and try to win her back. After getting past her friend who answered the door with some smooth talking they finally get the ex to come out to the porch and talk. He presents her with the amulet and apologizes for loosing it. She looks at the amulet and says...
"You moron! You think this is about a stupid piece of jewelry, I"M PREGNANT!"
That's what happens when you wear a helmet your whole life!
My house rules
Having our Giff literally strength check a Goristro during it's horn charge attack. Pulled a Captain America holding back Thanos glove.
"You are a beginner once, but a student for life." - Firearm Instruction Adage.
...
Soon to be DM.
Currently in a homebrew post-apocalyptic game.
Our campaigns have been going back to when 5e was released. Some highlights:
In our Curse of Strahd game, we figured out how to keep Strahd from returning...ever. I cast Hallowed on his crypt so his minions couldn't save him. Then I used Stone Shape to make the inside of his sarcophagus pointy and sealed it shut. I put in a Blessed item we'd been carrying around forever. Oh, and I made the rider component of Hallowed that there could be no sound in the area. So, every 7-10 days (?) after he dies, Strahd is resurrected inside his sarcophagus where he takes damage from being on Hallowed ground and in the presence of a Blessed item. He can't regenerate because of the radiant damage, he can't cast Dispel because it has a verbal component and he's been silenced. So, he dies every week or ten days...over and over...
In our recent game, we were fighting a powerful Science Wizard (essentially an Artificer) from the Void Material Plane. He'd spread the idea around all of the Warforged he'd made that he was a god. We blew up the metal dragon he'd made by casting Flame Bolt into the aperture in his chest that was spewing a flammable oil every turn. Our Fighter/Rogue managed to put about 90 points of damage on the BBEG in one round and then the Barbarian and the Paladin did almost as much, each. It was one of those fights where you're losing...you're losing...hey, did we just win?
My all-time best con of my players was the time I made them believe they were dead. In order to enter a hidden temple and retrieve the Maguffin, they had to pass through a pitch-black portal. The Warlock sent his familiar in first and it promptly died. Believing that I wouldn't kill them outright, they all jumped through. They woke to find the NPC Cleric (an established friend who fed them missions), reviving them. He told them that he'd felt something wrong with the psychic connection he shared with them and he rushed to find them. He found them dead after several days of travel and tried to revive them. He wasn't powerful enough to bring them back fully but a gift they'd all received, one instance of Death Ward each, had preserved their souls. He'd brought them all back as Revenants so they could finish their mission. Necromantic damage would heal them but Healing would hurt. In the end, it was all a sham. The Cleric was an agent of the BBEG and he'd transformed them to all feel cold and lifeless and to drain the color from their skin. If anyone had actually tried a Healing spell, it would have worked and the jig would have been up.
To sum up a few without going overboard on details:
Make your Artificer work with any other class with 174 Multiclassing Feats for your Artificer Multiclass Character!
DM's Guild Releases on This Thread Or check them all out on DMs Guild!
DrivethruRPG Releases on This Thread - latest release: My Character is a Werewolf: balanced rules for Lycanthropy!
I have started discussing/reviewing 3rd party D&D content on Substack - stay tuned for semi-regular posts!
Okay...the pole-dancing Barb sounds EPIC!
I was the DM and there were only two players that night so I rolled up three NPCs to help the party. They had ended the last session by escaping a zombie horde (100+) and ducking into a nearby building. It was a two story warehouse with technically a third story clearance making the building 30ft tall and 90ft squared. The bottom floor was empty but a wooden catwalk ringed the second floor where there was an office.
At the start of the session they realize on party member didn't make it inside and that there were two half-elves as well as a dwarf hiding inside the building. The party lied to the NPCs about some minor unimportant stuff for no reason other than to just lie and the dwarf NPC called the party out on their lie. Instead of just explaining it or doing what normal people would they go murderhobo and start attacking the NPCs. In the heat of the battle, which nearly killed them, they lit the warehouse on fire by accident. At the end of battle they realize that the place is burning down and zombies will break inside at any moment. I used a physical thirty minute hour glass to show how long they have until the building burns forcing them to rush through their turns and creating a sense of urgency.
The party bolted up the stairs then climbed the ladder up to the roof, which again is technically an additional story tall. They make it up and lock the trap door to the roof behind them. Running around the edge of the roof they realize the fire has brought more zombies over to their location and they lost both of their immovable rods as well as both of collapsible poles. No one has flying or levitate. The building is sill burning and the roof is starting to get weaker as they IRL have fifteen minutes left in the thirty minute hour glass. Hatching a plan they use their battleaxe as an improvised weapon after tying a rope to it. They toss it over across the 15ft wide street through a window of the fourth floor into the four story stone building next door. It took them two goes then secured itself as a makeshift grappling hook. They then proceeded to tie the other end of their rope to the trapdoor on the roof and began to climb across the gap on the rope.
One party member makes it just as the thirty minute hour glass runs put of sand and the roof gives way. The rope attached to the trapdoor goes slack with the other party member on the line. Only the battle axe used as a makeshift grappling hook keeps them from plummeting straight to their doom. The party member who made it across dives for the battle axe as it jumps from it's hold and passes his check to grab it. Meanwhile the other party member swings into the side of the stone building receiving a concussion and being knocked out. They fall but were tied off so they only fall so far until they are just out of reach of the zombie horde below.
Now the kicker is the party member who grabbed the axe and made it across was the weak one and also the one who had almost no gear on because they were the weak one and though it would be easier to climb across unencumbered. So, they gave everything to the party member who is now dead weight on the other end of this rope hanging out over a horde of zombies. The had to make an athletics check to draw them up, one for each story so two, but they kept succeeding and then failing so they made about eight checks. It was super tense and hilarious but eventually he got his party member to safety inside the building. Lucky for them the building was a bank and so while zombies had gotten inside they were all trapped being the barriers on the first floor. This building was impenetrable and it had sewer access so they could easily get in and out without much fuss from zombies.
They had a lot of fun. People always do in that campaign because no one ever expects for the environment to challenge their characters. It is always a trap or a monster but never just circumstances and natural obstacles like climbing. It is hard to make those more mundane checks fun, but as a DM when you do it really makes the entire campaign!
"Life is Cast by Random Dice"
Burn my candle twice.
I have done my life justice
Against random dice.
I neglected to mention that the entire session was Improv, because I had drawn a huge lake, with piers at both ends, between them and their goal, and did not (for whatever reason) anticipate them travelling by boat.
Make your Artificer work with any other class with 174 Multiclassing Feats for your Artificer Multiclass Character!
DM's Guild Releases on This Thread Or check them all out on DMs Guild!
DrivethruRPG Releases on This Thread - latest release: My Character is a Werewolf: balanced rules for Lycanthropy!
I have started discussing/reviewing 3rd party D&D content on Substack - stay tuned for semi-regular posts!
Today's was probably the wildest and most fun session I've ever run in my admittedly short career. For context I'm running Tomb of Annihilation and the level 3 (almost 4) party consisted of a tabaxi artificer with a panda steel defender, lizardfolk wizard, dwarf fighter, half-elf light cleric, and Azaka Stormfang the guide NPC.
I don't know how to mark for spoilers or spells or anything but there are a few spoilers in here if you're playing ToA. Read at your own risk.
We'd stopped last session just as Zalkoré (medusa queen who was tripping balls) sicced 3 eblis on them, so the party fights them first thing. The lizardfolk wizard had it in his head that he wanted to make "eblis noodle soup", and every turn he'd make a comment like "I will cook you into eblis noodle soup!" They were scared that after killing her eblis that Zalkoré was going to kill them next, but she just applaueded their skill and called for another eblis to bring in some (poisoned) fruit and wine. The dwarf fighter was still salty from the fight and tried to intimidate Z into giving up the thing that they came for in the first place (a rare flower for use in a ritual), however she rolled really low and Z turned to her hallucinatory boyfriend and said "Oh she's so funny love, we should keep her". This made the fighter grumpy but not enough to fight yet as no one wanted to get petrified.
We also had an entertaining moment where the cleric pretended to eat the poisoned fruit to keep Z happy, rubbing his stomach and saying how good it was. She tried to give him drugs, but he disposed of them less convincingly.
Highlight of the session was an epic natural 20 by the artificer to steal the flower and run for it, everyone crept out without alerting Z except for Azaka, their guide. She shoved the others out of the room and would have faced Z alone by virtue of being a weretiger, but the fighter and cleric convinced the others to go back and save her. Cue the epic battle with 2 near petrifications and liberal use of the Catapult spell by the artificer. They won, and I got to describe Z's ghostly boyfriend kneel before her body and sob silently before disappearing.
There was really crappy loot except for some of Z's leftover drugs, which the artificer took happily and the rest went to the cleric and wizard. Next session we're logging new abilities from a level-up and the artificer will make a gun. Looking forward to it for sure!
Forever DM but I want to play at some point
I'm not very experienced with D&D Beyond, so sorry if I mess something up.
The setting: Someone in our party was challenged to a duel that was set at the same time as the ball, we did the duel on a large stage about a third of the size of the ballroom.
Classes: Ranger, Rogue, Druid (me), Fighter (my bestie who I lived on an island with after getting exiled from Olympus), Barbarian, Cleric (two of them)
I was chosen as Fighter's 2nd for this duel, somehow most everyone else got involved, except for the Barbarian and Ranger who were somewhere else (the players didn't show up that day) and one of our Clerics (in canon, they hated working with us, so they just watched from a table near to the stage) and the Rogue (who liked to mess with my character in every imaginable way possible, so she was at a different table).
It was set up as a tag-team thing, our opponent and his lackeys swapping with some monsters of my DM's own creation (evil bugger).
We're fighting, everything's going as normal as a duel in the Feywild could be, everyone attending the ball is watching at this point, including representatives of the Court of Beasts and Brutality and their human slaves (this is important info for later)..... then Evil Bugger releases his specially crafted monsters, one was a slimy and grotesque ooze and another was like an owlbear but Not, there was also a giant ostrich because why not. I realize as we're fighting these guys that the Ooze is really powerful and we're going to need help, so I use my beast-speech to convince the Ostrich to p*ss off (I actually made it have an existenstial crisis that made it realize that it's spent its whole life serving these a-holes, so it jumped off the stage and started to run outside to go find sanctuary in the nearby wood, which is when our Rogue decided to JUMP ON ITS BACK AND RIDE THE F*CKER, ACCIDENTALLY KILLING ONE OF THE COURT REPS AND MAIMING ANOTHER) and our other Cleric convinced the Not Owlbear to turn against Ooze. Ooze quickly kills Not Owlbear by literally ripping it in half at the waist and eating it. I see an opportunity and use a heightened Control Water spell to manipulate the blood of Dead Not Owlbear, exploding it and Ooze. We celebrate too early. Guy We're Dueling sends out some knight that died in his last duel against adventurers and sends him after Other Cleric. At this point, Dead Ooze is in three main pieces and now they're alive for some reason (dude's an effin' flatworm is what I'm thinking to myself) and now we have MORE monsters than before, so I use Mass Suggestion to seize the minds of the human slaves of the CoBnB Reps and make 'em fall in love with me (my character is a Nymph btw, so it's not like it's unreasonable) and fight for me, I make sure to tell them to get actual weapons tho. The majority of Human Slaves grabbed like sticks or knives or the occasional sword but this one dude named Leonard took it upon himself to get an effin' CIVIL WAR RIFLE which he f*ckin sucked with. With this new-found Human Infantry that I've acquired, two of the Ooze Remnants die (permanently this time) and Leonard shoots Other Cleric in the shoulder, lower back, and leg at different times while Other Cleric was fighting Zombie Knight (I defended my loyal marksman of course by saying that Other Cleric should've just moved-- despite being grappled by Zombie Knight at the time of being shot). The fight has been going on for a while at this point so I just use the Tidal Wave spell and we call it a day.